Seven Billionth of the World's Opinion

The Other Me by Saskia Sarginson Shame over Suspected Nazi Father and Family Skeletons

2016-01-12T02:27:00.002-08:00

An emotionally charged novel, we learn of Klaudia’s shame over her German father, Otto, causes her to shirk from him as a child and to change her identity as an adult. This because she suspects he had committed atrocities during the Holocaust.

Buy from Amazon

And so the story is told from three (or rather two) viewpoints: Klaudia, her new identity, Eliza and Otto’s brother, Ernst.

Shame over Nazi Heritage

Klaudia is brought up in 80’s Wales in a small community where news travels fast and secrets are hard to keep. The result? Bullying at school, involving the Third Reich. This sets the catalyst for Klaudia’s new identity in the form of Eliza later in life. But her decision has consequences when she falls for Cosmo, who she hides the truth from. Poor Cosmo has the patience of a saint with Klaudia, who gives him confused messages, which gets a little irritating after a while. Her shame is tinged with self-centredness.

We also live through the eyes of Ernst, Otto’s brother during 1930s Germany. He is the more humane of the two brothers, yet it is he who ends up killing to survive. Ottos’ fate is not what one might expect.

Novel of Family Secrets

There are some frustrating moments in the novel when things are about to happen but tiresome obstructions get in the way. For instance, when Klaudia is about to learn the truth about her mother’s death, and when Cosmo is about to learn the truth about Klaudia’s true identity.

The ending was overlong, with undue solemnity. I found myself skimming paragraphs in the final chapters. Despite family members sharing years under the same roof, no one asks crucial questions. OK, so fear is an obstacle, but the result doesn’t make joyful reading. I just wished someone would break the spell and move things along.

This is a novel with sensitive portrayal of the protagonists and some good twists, but at times, the story was simply too drawn out and I got irritated with Klaudia. Well written, though and above par.

Only Ever Yours by Louise O’Neill: Nightmare School for Bitching and Dysmorphia

2016-01-07T02:19:00.000-08:00

The story is set in a horrific girl’s finishing school, where protagonist, freida is born to be brainwashed into being the ‘perfect’ eve. In other words, to be as close to a showroom dummy as possible: impassive, slim and obedient. Not even their names deserve to be capitalized.

Buy from Amazon

Novel about and Anorexia and Dysmorphia

This novel is making an important point about society’s pressures on women to be perfect in looks and behaviour. And so we are showered with descriptions of what the eves are wearing, their bitching and competitiveness as they dine at the low-carb table. At times, these descriptions repeat somewhat and I found myself gleaning, getting the point.

But soon, the eves are to graduate via a ‘ceremony’ where ‘inheritants’, (young boys) will pick the best of the eves to become their companions. The leftovers will be scrapped to become concubines or chastities or worse, cast to the Underground.

Freida is not too bright, allowing herself to become a victim of the system and making dumb choices throughout the novel. Her nasty guardian, chastity-ruth constantly makes freida’s life a misery. The only eve to act against the grain, is freida’s best friend, isobel. She puts on weight and rebels against the system. But there is more to isobel than meets the eye, which is revealed at the end.

Society’s Pressures on Women

Echoing of 1984 and the Stepford Wives, this is a chilling account of mass brainwashing where covert bullying is rife between the eves. Nasty megan is textbook, as well as her henchgirls, the robotic twins who are as nasty as they come.

Freida has her chance in Darwin, an inheritant who appears to want to choose her as his companion. But dumb freida does it again, when she betrays Darwin to megan who is as treacherous as a bag of snakes. Why? The mind boggles!

This novel makes an important point for every teenage girl who feels worthless, but freida’s wantonly victim behaviour is frustrating to live through, and the ending left me feeling bereft. There was no hope on the horizon or of change. Only total despair. Even 1984 had more hope to offer.

I couldn’t feel sorry for freida, because I prefer to live a story through the eyes of someone with a little more clout or intelligence, or something to yield the smallest surprise.

A novel with something to say but hardly uplifting.

In Plain Sight: the Life and Lies of Jimmy Savile by Dan Davies: A Shocking Read

2015-12-21T07:39:00.001-08:00

A compelling account on how Jimmy Savile fixed it for the British nation to be hoodwinked.

This indepth book opens with the chapter entitled Apocalypse Now Then. The distinction between the defacing of a tombstone on a Scarborough hillside and the glitzy life of Jimmy Savile could not be more extreme. I grew up with Savile on TV. He always grated on me for no definable reason. I felt obliged to ‘like’ him because he was the oldest teenager on Top of the Pops, did lots for charity and was one of England’s great eccentrics. Even as a young child, I just couldn’t like him. But what a shocking story Davies tells.

Savile's Interviews with Dan Davies

Buy from Amazon

Few can be more qualified to write about Savile’s life than Davies, who first met Savile during a Clunk Click episode, where he got spooked into a lifelong obsession on the man behind the cigar smoke. Davies met Savile numerous time throughout his journalistic life, stopping in the ‘Duchess’ (Savile’s then dead mother) bedroom overnight.

Davies’ descriptions of Savile interviews make compelling reading, particularly the small detail: the way Savile would smugly puff at his cigar and stretch that thin grin, telling the same old tales. But Davies remains sceptical. Was Savile ever really a Bevin Boy? It would seem evidence did not always back up Savile's claims.

The Double Life of Jimmy Savile

Each chapter alternates between the present and the past, where the two timelines eventually meet at the end. Davies’ account evidences fastidiously accurate research, yet never gets bogged down into a dry detail. Instead, the tale is played out in a slow car crash, where Savile ingratiates higher and higher into British circles. Meanwhile, like a fly in the soup, Davies skilfully sandwiches unsavoury accounts of the vulnerable in children’s’ homes Savile virtually ‘owned’. The reader is catapulted between the persona of a national hero and a sex predator.

Davies does not sensationalize, but tells it as it is. But had this account been written as fiction, it might be criticised for being farfetched. It just comes to show that regardless of emerging as the youngest runt of a Leeds litter, having monstrous narcissism can carry you into high circles.

I feel this book is an important inclusion on British society from the 1950s to the 1990s, not least because Savile managed to woo not only the nobles, but also the British public.

My only issue is that I wish the book had contained more images. It has about 5 images that are rather small and indistinct. I felt, with Davies’ gripping narrative, more imagery could have made the experience more rounded.

That said, the book is a memorable read that sits uncomfortably alongside the memories I had of Savile as a child

Junk Food in Supermarkets are Giving you Diabetes, Obesity and Candida

2015-12-14T03:50:00.001-08:00

According to the government’s obesity and healthy eating policy, most people in Britain are overweight or obese. This means that the risk of developing heart disease, cancer and diabetes are rife. But I find it no surprise when I see the dire state of our supermarkets. The food they stock is a disgrace.

Why the Government Action to Tackle Obesity in Britain will Not Work

I took this pic in the Coop Superstore

Their strategy might sound good on paper, but will not work in practice, and I’ll tell you why in a moment. For now, government’s strategy informs on:

Having a healthy diet and getting exercise.

This includes getting people to eat their 5 a day, reducing fat and salt, reducing portion sizes as well as alcohol intake.

Better labeling on food and drink to help consumers make healthier choices

Include healthy menus in restaurants.

Local councils to provide health services for obese people.

Their ‘call to action’ makes the statement that it is everybody’s responsibility to lose weight. This means the individual, the family, the health service and the council. But what about the supermarkets?

Why is Britain is Fat and Will Stay Fat

Merry Christmas, you have Diabetes

This government policy may sound all well and good, but it will not work, because their strategy cannot be put into practice. And why? Walk into your average supermarket (Asda, Tesco, Aldi and the Coop) and you will find aisles and aisles of fizzy drinks, chocolates, crisps and booze. There is little choice of healthy foods and they are relatively harder to find.

“But there are aisles of fruit and veg,” I hear you cry.

Yes, there are, but eating lots of fruit and veg is only part of the story. In practice, it is hard because we live in a generally cold climate. Few people I speak to actually manage to eat eat five a day. This is because of the peeling and coring of highly perishable foods that leave you hungry, as they are quickly digested. They also take up loads of freezer space. Soon, you will find yourself groping for a quick unhealthy snack courtesy of Asda.

People will reach for the fruit juice thinking this counts as a 1 in the 5. But fruit juice contains a lot of sugar that is quickly digested. Great for diabetes and candida. Consuming lots of fruit juice will merely enhance your sugar cravings.

Cause of Candida Albicans

Hidden sugars will be found in the remaining aisles within tinned foods, frozen ready meals and so-called ‘low fat’ products. When I say low fat, I mean the sort of products that will make you fat. ‘Low fat’ yogurt contains loads of sugar. Cereals are the worst. Frosties should be banned. Sugar will make you fat.

If you were a healthy alien without candida, sugar cravings, excess weight or diabetes and you transported yourself into the average British town, such as Nuneaton, you will find yourself hard-pressed not to find a diet that will not eventually give you these conditions. It is virtually impossible to eat healthily in Britain because the average supermarket gives little choice of healthy foods. And even if they do, the prices are way too high.

If you don’t like chocolate, biscuits, crisps, bread, booze or sugar, you will find little else to cure your hunger. British supermarkets are geared to make you fat.

What the Government Needs to do to Cure Obesity

The government needs to target supermarkets to make them accountable for the junk they stock. I think we need different foods in the aisles. Put the junk food on a small aisle at the back of the store with the dog food.

Introduce more interesting foods from the around the world that are easy to cook or can be eaten in an instant. The answer lies in low carb, high protein and high fibre foods. I find foreign supermarkets more interesting than the British supermarket. End the rip-off prices of healthy foods in health shops such as Holland and Barrett and put the healthy foods into the average British supermarket. At supermarket prices.

British Supermarkets are Making You Fat

I found small packs of ground wheatgerm, flaxseeds, sunflower seed and pumpkin seeds in Asda. They were stuck on the bottom shelf where I could easily have missed them, but I almost jumped for joy at their discovery.

I also nearly had an orgasm when I discovered Polish bread with complex carbs and low in carbs (45%). There are also nut milks such as hazelnut, almond and Coconut produce. Stevia has recently made an appearance too, but the supermarket brand has added maltodextrin, which is a simple sugar. Shame.

But I would like to see more of this kind of thing. As we are a carb-loving country, I would like to see different flours and different breads and biscuits that supply satisfying, quick snacks that are slow to digest and low in carbohydrate. Complex carbs, high protein, low sugar. But not necessarily low fat, only healthy fat.

Since cutting a lot of sugar from my diet, I find a lot of foods in the supermarket horribly sweet. I grimace at the taste of fruit yoghurt and fizzy drinks. It is shocking how much sugar can be found within. Yet once upon a time, I liked this stuff because I was used to the taste and it satisfied my candida. Well, yeast’s gotta have sugar! It makes me sad to see people still stick this junk into their supermarket trolley, as I used to.

Healthy Fast Food

We live in a cold climate. We want carbs. We can’t help it. I find 5 a day fruit and veg hard to practice. The answer lies in complex low carb tasty snacks that are low in glycemic index. I’m afraid such a product has not been invented, but I would like to find high protein, high fibre biscuits and snacks that satisfy like the digestive biscuit. No simple sugars, no hydrogenated vegetable oil.

At the moment, I make my own ‘treats’ by using varying amounts of the following ingredients: coconut butter, Tahini, dried fruits, Manuka honey, Stevia, wheatgerm, Spelt flour, rye flour, ground almonds, ground brazil nuts and such stuff. Butter will not do you as much ham as sugar. Sugar is by far the biggest killer in this country and the government should be targeting sugar as the number one cause of obesity.

Until that day, I shall blog more on this subject.

The Violet Hour by Richard Montanari: Regular Reporter in Cat and Mouse with Serial Killer

2015-12-14T02:04:00.003-08:00

I was sold by the blurb and the opening of this thriller. A priest is murdered via overdose during shenanigans and then is thrown out of the window, mantel and all to plummet deathwards .Well, what isn’t there to hook the reader? We don’t know who the killer is, there are some colourful characters and the writing was fine. But I didn’t anticipate the next reading. In fact, I got distracted by another book halfway through and that is never a good sign.

Thriller with Colorful Characters

When I returned to the Violet Hour, I found I didn’t care much about what happened. There was a fair amount of aimless bantering between characters, it seemed, to illustrate the nature of cousins Nicky and Joe’s relationship, as well as the mete of the other hustlers in the neighbourhood. Nicky is a regular good guy with a lot of weird associations, only I didn’t care.

Thriller about Halloween Past

Halloween 1988 has significance to the killer and he is out for revenge for a traumatic event. There were some missing pieces that don’t come together until the end. There are some truly gruesome scenes where the killer slices bodily parts from his victims. Someone described this book as the new Hannibal, because the killer likes to use the body parts as props. But this book wasn’t half as good.

I wouldn’t call it a page turner, but some scenes might stay in the memory, only not for the right reasons. There is a twist at the end.

Andy Weir The Martian: In Space there are Potatoes Aplenty But No One Can Hear you Scream like a Girl

2015-12-06T03:16:00.002-08:00

This book seemed to be written with Matt Damon in mind, although I haven’t seen the film. Most of the story is told through abandoned astronaut, Watney’s log, which is tinged with tongue-in-cheek comments such as, ‘I’m off to play with drugs and radiation’ and ‘yay, I’m pretty much f..cked.’

Buy from Amazon

Science Fiction with Realism

But this irony is what really defines this book as well as an entertaining lesson on physics and chemistry. Stuck with seventies TV and disco as entertainment provides contrast against the harsh realities of Mars.

So, Watney is stranded on Mars after his team, believing him dead, cut their mission short. Knowing what we now know about Mars, the book asks ‘what if...?’ There are no little green men, only dust storms, low gravity, extreme cold and the sterile environment. In Bond fashion, Watney has to find creative solutions to seemingly unsolvable problems.

And the answers lie in a combination of potatoes, duct tape and sending Morse code via the positioning of rocks. At any moment, Watney could blow himself, up, starve to death, suffocate or die of thirst.

Survival Odds on Mars

I liked Watney being ahead of me in overcoming problems, some of which were nail-biting. Examples were avoiding dust storms that would reduce power to solar cells, leaving him stranded; getting blown up via a lethal mixture of oxygen and hydrogen and avoiding an overdose of radiation from the RTG, a vital source of heat.

But enjoyable though the book was, I couldn’t believe any human could get through those 18 months alone on a desolate planet without more traumas to the psyche, even with NASA training. Where was Watney’s mental breakdown, being spooked or craving intimacy? He didn’t seem to miss a blue sky, a girlfriend or yearn for smell fresh air. There were no descriptions of the other characters or of the Mars’ landscape. How about the light? The mighty canyons? The weird haze in the sky? Sometimes, I didn’t get a sense of being there.

The read was diverting and educational, but the science stuff overshadowed what the experience would really be like for a lone astronaut on a desolate planet. Still, I left with a strong impression of Watney’s sardonic wit.

The Pilot’s Wife by Anita Shreve: Slow Burn Suspense of a Husband’s Betrayal

2015-11-27T07:22:00.002-08:00

This mystery thriller has a strong beginning, drawing the reader in with a multitude of questions. A wife living a blissful domestic life is interrupted by news that her pilot husband has been killed in an air crash off the cost of Ireland. But the nightmare is just beginning when Kathryn soon realises her husband was not the man she thought he was.

Buy from Amazon

Thriller of a Double Life

Shreve’s strength lies in her compelling narrative of the protagonist’s inner thoughts and resultant difficult emotions when investigator, Roger keeps coming back with questions about the cause of the crash. Had it been suicide? Political? An accident? Nothing seems to fit.

This thriller demonstrates how a woman living in domestic blissful life can be blind to her husband’s indiscretions. Her belief their marriage had been watertight falls apart, as well as her former identity which she questions. What had her role been in this long-standing marriage?

Revealing a Murky Past

After encountering mysterious notes on scraps of paper, Kathryn takes a trip to London to discover their meaning. And here, the full, ugly picture begins to emerge about her husband and his betrayal is laid bare. Despite having a supportive network, namely her own mother, Julia, Roger from the Agency and a teenage daughter, Kathryn is ultimately alone in a strange place.

I empathised for Kathryn, robbed of her ability to express anger towards her husband, and of feeling vulnerable under the questions of Roger, whose motives were at times questionable. However, this might have been more a reflection of Kathryn’s state of mind.

Shreve is great at conveying what it is like to experience conflicting emotions and misplaced trust, which I thought was brilliantly described. But this s a slow burn of a thriller, rather than a rollercoaster ride, but the pacing fitted the theme. The suspense is drip-fed in timely portions, retaining the story’s credulity. The momentum really picks up over the final third of the novel, which I read in one sitting

The Dining Club by Marina Anderson: The Low End of Fifty Shades with Freaky Twins

2015-11-23T04:12:00.000-08:00

So, I brought this book from Tesco’s thinking this might be an enticingly dark read with a mystery and erotica. And being a Sunday Times bestseller, urged me to stick it in my basket. How wrong can you be!

Buy from Amazon

David is a dark, scarred, emotionally stunted cold fish with as much sex appeal as a trout. And delusional Grace is desperate for his love. And after he decided to reveal his secret of the Dining Club where clients live out their sexual fantasies of BDSM, Grace is ecstatic.

But all that happens is that Grace has to pass different tests via the tables of the Dining Club that reveals deeper levels of BDSM. And all this to win the love of a trout! Yes, David has commitment issues, blowing hot and cold and keeping Grace’s heart in suspense. And to complicate matters, Grace seems to have competition via the current female boss of the Dining Club.

I disliked a lot of things about this book, notably the twin characters, which seems to afflict a lot of contemporary literature out there. Twins are not freaks, weirdos or sex objects. It seems both are in competition for male attention, getting sulky and jealous over stupid things. Twins do no behave that way because I am one. And these two have just dropped off the conveyor belt to fulfil yet another stereotypical role in literature. The other characters seemed to behave little more than puppets, namely, Grace’s other love interest, Andrew.

The purpose of a novel is to show how a character has changed, developed or evolved. I was left feeling that Grace was supposed to come across like a more whole person, a stronger person. She is no longer a needy sex object of David’s, but now feels ready to become new boss-ette sex object of the Dining Club. She has come far!

I like dark, sexy reads and scarred characters, but those that inhabit the Dining Club are thin, delusional, dislikeable or a bunch of trouts. I struggled to keep with it.

A Clockwork Orange by Anthony Burgess: Droog’s Viewpoint of an Orwellian Dystopia

2015-11-23T02:21:00.003-08:00

I felt this was one of those cult books to read before you die and enhance your reading prowess rather than as an enjoyable or relaxing read. And what does Burgess mean by pairing clockwork and orange?

Buy from Amazon

Teen ‘droog’ Alex relates of his nightmarish existence in a futuristic world of chaos via Nadstat lingo, a sort of slang mixed with Glasnost, which took a little getting used to, but once I had referred to the glossary a few times, I began to understand that moloko was milk, horrorshow means good, and I found I could ‘viddy’ see the meanings of other such words within sentences.

What Clockwork Orange Means

Alex’s friends George, Pete and Dim tear through the streets, wantonly fighting, raping and robbing. The old folks of the town lament the old days when things seemed good. A writer is caught in the crossfire, when Alex blithely tears up his beloved manuscript that is the namesake of this novel. I felt bad for the author, knowing just how precious a piece of writing can be to an author.

After the death of an old woman, Alex is incarcerated by the ‘millicent’ in the Staja State Prison, where this shameless subject becomes part of an experiment – the dodgy Ludovico mind control technique.

A Book to Read Before you Die

A book on a par with George Orwell’s 1984, the theme seemed to ask whether a man is truly good if the bad were simply taken from him. In the style of Stalin’s totalitarianism, Alex is de-individualised in the name of the many. To this end, Alex is forced to watch images of mayhem and violence whilst doctors inject Alex with nausea-inducing drugs. To twist the knife, they also create the same association of feeling sick with Alex’s love of classical music and sex.

Alex reacquaints himself with the author of A Clockwork Orange on his release, and we can see that Alex has become same himself – a fruit of nature crushed by the system, to behave as programmed, like clockwork.

But there is also a deeper meaning to these pairing of words, in as we can see he was a clockwork orange prior to the Ludovico technique of the Staja Prison in that nature has its own programming of how a human develops. In his senior years, Alex begins to crave a peaceful life, leaving behind his hectic years of teenhood, just as nature intended.

The question arises, where is free will if not found in the system and not in nature? Burgess seems to make the point that a man cannot be a man without free will. A heavy read, that might be due to an essay or exam requirement (or to read before you die), the question of the individual versus the system is an important one that concerns us all.

What Was Lost by Catherine O’Flynn: Funny Tragic Thriller Personifying a Shopping Mall

2015-11-22T15:32:00.002-08:00

And odd thriller, this novel is split into two times frames, 19 years apart. The story begins with amateur 10 year old sleuth, Kate who sets up Falcon Investigations, assisted by her toy chimp, Mikey. Her recordings of events within a shopping mall, Green Oakes, would appear inconsequential, such as the questionable meats of Mr. Watkins’ butchers and a tramp looting for discarded food in the bins. Fuelled by loneliness and loss, Kate strikes up a friendship with 22 year old neighbour, Adrian.

Green Oaks Personified

An interesting side-plot of tearaway Teresa runs full circle when she becomes a policewoman due to filling Kate’s place in an entry exam to a private school. Years later, Teresa becomes key in solving the questions around Kate’s disappearance. But hidden horrors lurk behind net curtains: Teresa’s so-called abusive dad, for instance, and how she keeps his nasty side subdued for her own survival. Crime lurks in domestic life rather than on the streets.

Buy from Amazon

The second part of the book continues through the viewpoint of security guard, Kurt 19 years later after he spots what appears to be Kate through CCTV. Green Oaks lives through ghosts past and present, and through the voices of the people that pass through. It has hidden tunnels and is somewhat creepy. Humour is embedded within tragedy, such as dullard Ed, who strives to appear a moody and dark noir persona, but fails miserably, due to his middle classed background from Solihull. And Dave, his boss, who issues expletives in an affected way.

Ghostly Story of Past and Future

But this thriller is really about ghosts in it many forms, through the past, future through the thoughts that haunt the people that pass through the glass doors. Kurt’s past similarly haunts him, and this fuels his relationship with Lisa, both afflicted by loss.

O’Flynn makes us see enclosed spaces where people congregate as having a persona, living and breathing through its visitors. Green Oaks keeps secrets somewhere within its many passageways. The answers are in plain view, but are not made evident until new security guard, Gavin takes up assistant security guard alongside Kurt.

The final chapter is chilling and sad. Award winning novels are often overrated, but this one is an exception, being funny, chilling and sensitively written.

The Sad Truth about Amazon Reviews: Observations of a Book Reviewer

2015-11-19T02:40:00.000-08:00

Many book reviews on the Amazon platform are not genuine. This is a sad fact the average Amazon shopper may not realise. Dozens of five star reviews will often magically appear weeks before the release of an A-list author’s book, regardless of its quality. There has also stories of sockpuppets, rival authors giving one star reviews on books that compete within their genre. Authors will also create fake accounts to sockpuppet five stars upon their own work.

The Problem of Bogus Reviews

Amazon has tried to crack down on bogus reviews via algorithms that detect connections between the author and the reviewer, which might be the IP address of the computer, a home address or if there has been communications between reviewer and author online. For any of these reasons, reviews will disappear, but sadly, the review system on Amazon remains badly flawed.

The Stakes of Being a Vine Reviewer

Vine reviewers and highly-ranked reviewers have a lot at stake. Helpful votes will enhance and unhelpful votes will mar. Consider that a positive review is more likely to receive helpful votes than a negative review. Getting unhelpful votes will lower the reviewer’s score. For this reason, a reviewer that goes round giving four and five star reviews all the time is more likely get lots of helpful votes. Valued reviewers will also steer clear of controversial books or books they dislike, causing the posting of a ‘correct’ rather than an ‘honest’ review. Big publishers will give away hundreds of free books to the ‘correct’ reviewers, and if any of them don’t like the book, the review will not be published.

Popular Negative Reviews on Amazon

There are exceptions to this rule, for instance the ‘worst book ever written’ (I won’t say what the book is, but look it up) where people in their droves voted up the negative review. And on that matter, helpful votes are also given to a review simply for being funny.

Having produced books since 2006 have I learned one simple truth about Amazon. Your average honest and humble book lover simply will not leave book reviews. They just don’t want to – and I can’t really blame them. Book lovers like to read. Writing is a different matter. I have sold thousands of books. I’ve received my share of one-star potshots from rival authors and unfair reviews, but only a small amount are genuine reviews. In fact, I have received very few reviews overall. This is why I am always suspicious of a book tailed with dozens of book reviews weeks on its release.

Marketing a Poor Book Breed Success

This is the effectiveness of marketing prowess of huge book publishers. Even if the book is very poor, so long as it is backed by sponsors and those with a vested interest and those who receive freebies for being a ‘valued’ reviewer, it will get sales and reviews. I have yet to see a book published by the Big Five without a rack of reviews within a week or so of its release.

How to Tell if a Book is Any Good

The best way to determine if a book is any good or not is not to take Amazon at face value, but look at other sites. Some might consider Goodreads. Goodreads is owned by Amazon, and unlike its main platform, Amazon will not remove reviews or ratings there but it is very easy to set up several accounts and leave yourself lots of reviews. Goodreads is a system begging to be abused.

Platforms of lower caliber that have nothing to gain and nothing to lose are worth looking at. This is why I will often surf other sites for honest reviews. These include Barnes & Noble, Ibooks, Kobo, discussion threads, book review blogs or even Google itself.

When a Book Review is not a Book Review?

When it is posted on Amazon - boom boom. No, but seriously...

When a platform becomes competitive, when there is something to win or lose, when someone’s livelihood becomes dependent upon it, when sales are at stake, the system become corrupt. The same applies to everything else. Amazon has yet to crack the problem, but from where I stand, most of the reviews on Amazon are not a true reflection of a book’s quality, only of a political agenda.

The Drop by Michael Connelly: Likeable Plank Investigates a Suicide and an Undetected Serial Killer

2015-11-16T14:08:00.003-08:00

This, my first encounter with a Connelly book, the prose felt overwhelmingly male. How fitting the detective, Bosch would be a namesake to powertools – as upright as a plank, but likeable all the same.

Double Plot

Buy from Amazon

A double helix of a plot begins with an apparent cockup in the DNA department when a match is found between blood on an old murder victim and a suspect (Clayton Pell), only Pell would only have been eight at the time. Bosch’s nose starts twitching and he will not let up until he finds the answer to this riddle.

To Catch a Serial Killer

The plot gets complicated when old adversary, Councilman Irving asks Bosch to look into an apparent suicide of his son, found at the foot of a plush hotel. Bosch encounters corruption in high places, only those that pull the strings are being manipulated themselves. The story really takes momentum when Bosch rattles Irving’s cage, bringing about a showdown during a press conference.

But during all of this, a serial killer is sneaking beneath the radar, leaving a covert trail of blood three decades long. Things don’t go to plan with Pell and things almost go pear-shaped after Bosch’s partner Chu makes a mistake. Well, it is all very ‘high jingo.’. Bosch’s planky nature comes out when he does not forgive easily. He is also a little stilted with his daughter, whom he doesn’t spend much time with.

Connelly doesn’t go into detail of the serial killer’s horrors but he does so with food and navigational directions. Some might have seen the twist at the end, but I didn’t. A twisty turny plot that I enjoyed.

Bad Book Covers, So Bad, They’re Good, but Some are Simply Crap

2015-11-15T07:12:00.000-08:00

Crap book cover designs don’t necessarily dent the author’s sales as I had thought. They in fact attract attention. In this case, mine. Some are so bad, they are great. Find my choice selection of poor book cover designs.

PRE POLITICALLY CORRECT BOOK COVERS

Beethoven and Harpo have horrible secrets and so does the sexy daddy who is also a good lover. Never knew Baden-Powell felt that way, nor Tarzan about Cheetah. Anything with Savile’s face is abhorrent, and who will toss my salad?

BAD ARTWORK ON BOOK COVERS

Wobbly airbrush, dodgy compositions, figures look like taxidermist models or plastic Ken and Barbies. In the case, of Steez big red letters plonked over the redhead’s face. Stallion males have weird abs, cartoonish crabs and octopi instil wonder rather than fear and what is that face on fire?

DIVINE BOOKS NOT DIVINE IN COVER DESIGN

Questions arise, what is beneath the Mantle? Mother Theresa would be horrified and BIRTH CONTROL IS SINFUL IN THE CHRISTIAN MARRIAGES and...oh, forget to switch off CAPS. But learning some Jesus moves could help the retarded know God. Peek-a-boo, Jesus!

ANYTHING WITH WEREWOLVES AND TORSOS

What is it about Werewolves and torsos? All aesthetic go out of the window when the two are put together. The Final Harvest of the Werewolf is...oh dear. I’m sorry, but a Mate for the Wolf could mean man and...er beast. Watch out for those fangs! What’s the deal with the freaky tattoo on the man’s back? And the hairy freak in Onio?

CHRONICLES OF THE BAD BOY BOSS BILLIONAIRE WITH A HUGE TORSOS AND GIGANTIC ABS

Look out for words like paranormal romance, shapeshifter, billionaire romance (or millionaire romance for the working class), saga collection, chronicles book one, or two or thirteen, or series book one (or thirteen), with words including blood, dragons, vampires, the Boss, bad boy, alpha male, bondage, pictures of moons, BBW (is that a typo for BMW? And other such acronyms), witches, aliens and arse clamps. Book cover design is incidental to what awaits within! By the way, is that Ryan Giggs on the top right?

The bigger the abs, the better.

CHEESY ROMANTIC BOOK COVER DESIGNS

I’d run a mile if I saw that ripped-shirted male beckoning to me with a bunch of flowers. ‘Oh, come to me, my fair one!’ The BBW and the Space Lord. It’s that BMW typo again, only with magnificent pecks! Showroom dummy figures, tormented virgins, and Fabio. Oh, let them eat cake!

DON'T THINK THEY MEANT THAT

According to the cover, who cares about the disabled? And yes, being awesome takes practice! And a woman that seemed progressive for the age tells us, ‘always ask a man!’ Watch out for that inappropriately placed cowboy’s log...Oh, do I have to go on? Let the covers speak for themselves!

BAD PHOTOSHOP SKILLS

Simply so bad, I love 'em. What can I say?

American Psycho by Bret Easton Ellis: A Void Lies at the End of the Rainbow for Yuppie Psychopath

2015-11-04T03:58:00.001-08:00

Bateman, a Wall Street yuppie, intelligent, handsome and emotionally derelict, is on a disturbing journey into psychosis.

Buy from Amazon

The story begins when Bateman blithely declares that his secretary and other women in his life are in love with him. In reality, he sees them as mere ‘hardbodies’ falling to the feet of his cloying charms. But his admirers remain oblivious to this hollow man, preoccupied with their own aspirations.

Yuppie Eighties Values Gone Wrong

Bateman is obsessed with vanity and worldly possessions. His pad is clinical, shiny and modern, where the simple sentiment of a sunset or a flower has no place. His religion is his platinum credit card and he fantasizes about smashing the faces of anyone who dares to outdo him in acquisitions.

We learn of his music tastes; Whitney Houston, Huey Lewis & the News and Genesis, intimately assessed. Yet there is no feeling in his appraisals. He seems unaware of how music can connect with mood, only of hard facts. The hairs on the back of his neck are untweakable.

His friends are equally soulless, dining only where to be seen and drinking the fashionable mineral water. Everyone is good looking, fashionable and aspiring. But all of it is empty.

Mind of a Psychopath

And this, it seems, is the point. Contrasting with this sickly perfection is Bateman’s inner thoughts, ugly and blackly comical. He slaughters a Japanese cook, bloodying a fortune cookie in the process. He bequeaths Evelyn, his long-time girlfriend, the cookie, claiming the sticky red substance is sweet and sour sauce. Equally blind to Bateman’s inner ugliness is Carruthers, a work colleague, infatuated to the point of clinging onto Bateman’s ankles like an overgrown toddler in Barney’s a public bar.

Meanwhile, Bateman is slaying tramps, prostitutes and work colleagues that no one notices have gone missing. Bateman grows paranoid that someone else is parading around pretending to be him. Could it be that Bateman’s identity is disintegrating as his slayings grow ever more frantic? I found myself wishing something would break the spell, as the endless gristle, eyeballs, privates and throats take a severing. The reading was at times gruesome.

Bateman’s girlfriend, Evelyn should have been the ideal bait, being gullible, naive and ditzy, yet these qualities seemed to be the saving of her.

The final part of the book became like a club to the head, Bateman’s fantasies repeating like acid reflux and I was no longer sure of what was real. Did the murders actually happen, or did they remain the fantasies of Bateman’s deranged mind?

Bateman could have been the black hole at the centre of the eighties Yuppie ideology. A disturbing glimpse into what is feels to confuse contentment with cold-hearted greed.

The God Delusion by Richard Dawkins: An Intricate Case of Science Versus Religion

2015-11-01T15:17:00.002-08:00

Dawkins’ long and in depth book is really about how the existence of God stands up against science, or in other words, rationalization against the supernatural.

Buy from Amazon

He begins by stating that a rational discussion is thwarted by a fear of stepping on the toes of religion. Violence and drug-taking is also made excusable when under the guise of religion. Unlike nature and science theories, religion does not evolve. It has special privileges. And according to Dawkins, is the trouble with religion.

Is America is more Religious than England?

Dawkins asks why some races are more religious than others. He examines the case of America, who are on the whole more religious than England and suggests this might be because modern America is borne from immigrants seeking comfort after being uprooted from their homeland.

This could be further argued in the case of children who are prone to ‘dualism’, a ‘parent’ complex, almost like having a familiar. A consoling voice in the head makes us feel we are not alone. Perhaps this belief clings into adulthood, creating a lifelong faith that offers spiritual solace.

Dawkins introduces the concept of ‘NOMA’ a non-overlapping magisteria, where science and religion cannot encroach. If one overlaps the other, religion can no longer exist. This can be seen in the power of prayer. If a group of candidates were asked to pray for a subject and the other not to pray, a paradox results. According to clerics, prayer is about faith, not science, (unless the experiment proves that prayer works). But if the experiment proves that prayer has no effect upon the outcome, it could be argued that religion is about faith, not hard proof.

Writers of the Scriptures

This obscurity can also be seen in the Scriptures, authored by various scribes with various political agendas, long after the time of Jesus. Some of it is illogical. An Old Testament prophecy states ‘the Messiah will be born from David’. This is not strictly true, as Jesus is born from a virgin (Joseph’s ancestry becomes immaterial) Personally, I still see Joseph as Jesus’ father, if not in body, but in mind and emotionally.

But what about God’s great design? Well, Dawkins states that small incremental improvements over millennia are the true designer of nature. Darwinian evolution is about survival of the fittest and the most successful in procreation.

This book is quite complex and is not an easy read. The arguments are quite simple, but are put in convoluted phrases, via such obscure words as prestidigitation and tergiversation, that may not be found in the regular dictionary. Still, I could glean their meanings in context of the sentence.

Making the God Delusion more Readable

As the argument for and against God concerns us all, I felt that Dawkins’ book could have been made more inclusive for various reading abilities. I also thought that each chapter could have been summarized via bullet points to make the reading easier to digest.

In the end, I felt the book was more about the logic of kindness and humaneness against blind faith. After all, tribes of peace-loving gods often out-survive tribes of warring gods. Kindness can be differentiated from religion.

Clerics may dislike this book, but anyone willing to argue against Dawkins’ theory would do best to read and understand the book fully first.

The Humans by Matt Haig: Alien Entity Ruled by Logic Thrown into the Human Experience

2015-11-01T04:45:00.003-08:00

Don’t be misled by the blurb, this unusual tale is not science fiction, but poses the question of being human. An alien known as a Vonnagon invades the body of brilliant mathematician Andrew Martin to avert the spread of his breakthrough in the Riemann Hypothesis.

Buy from Amazon

This solution to the puzzle of how prime numbers are sequenced could be disastrous for the alien race as well as the Cosmos as a whole. So the alien has been assigned to kill anyone who knows the answer.

What it Feels Like to be Human

But really, this is a novel about what it feels like to be human from an alien perspective. The alien, (now known as Andrew) starts to feel what humans feel as he gets to know Andrew’s family. This is an unusual and sensitively written book on how an advanced alien as this Vonnagon could be caught in a paradox of logic and being human.

The narrative style is at times stilted, like that written by an adolescent boy. I imagined Andrew to be like Data from Star Trek that has been pushed into a human body. For him, the experience is overwhelming and confusing and articulation of this experience is difficult. Hormones, food cravings, mortality and hangovers cannot cohabit logic. The only way to resolve everything is to read poetry and to love.

Advice for a Human

The opening scene describes Andrew’s first experience of earth as he walks naked down a street. People think this brilliant mathematician has simply suffered a mental breakdown. When spat at for the offence of public nakedness, Andrew spits back, thinking this is an earth greeting. Andrew also gets disastrously wrong infidelity and teenage suicide, but also right in a naive way.

The chapter ‘Advice for a Human’ is worth reading twice for these almost childish points. They would seem obvious, only they aren’t when living continuously within the human organism. Living in human skin is like not seeing the wood for the trees.

Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn: What it is Like to be Duped? Read this Thriller to Find Out

2015-10-31T15:19:00.003-07:00

A well crafted thriller that plays little tricks with the reader. But the manipulation really lies in the reader’s oblivion to this fact until halfway through the story.

Nick has been accused of foul play after his wife, Amy goes missing. All clues would appear to lead to an eventual discovery of a body, but no body is found. This confounds the police, particularly Boney who can read situations beyond what is apparent. Something doesn’t add up.

Buy from Amazon

Diary of a Psychopath

Alternating chapters tells Amy’s story via a secret diary up to the point of her disappearance. Nick apparently has been an unpleasant husband, spending all her money and growing more moody and selfish. The final straw is when Amy discovers Nick is having an affair with the local bimbo.

It would seem Amy had sacrificed her life as a writer and her friends in New York to live in the Deep South where she grows increasingly isolated and disillusioned. The story really drew me in and I enjoyed Flynn’s eloquent writing which underlined the sort of person Amy is. My feelings towards certain characters in the thriller took a 180 degree swing, not only regarding Nick and Amy, but also her ex boyfriend, Desi.

Duping the Reader

I did feel some unnecessary padding towards the final third of the book, where Amy loses money to a couple of tramps, and the ending was slightly unsatisfying, but did not detract from the entertainment value. But in the end, Flynn was making a point. Be careful of who you meet. Not everyone is what they appear to be. Some people make an art of duping. Lies can be wrapped in truth. But the nature of the narcissist will always come out in time.

The Savage Hour by Elaine Proctor: A Slow Paced South African Murder Mystery

2015-10-29T15:12:00.004-07:00

Matriarchal figure, Ouma is found drowned in the pool of a small African village and at first everyone thinks it was an accident. But footprints are found near the site as well as mysterious substance beneath the fingernails. Investigator Jannie is sent to solve the mystery and instead opens a can of worms within the locals.

South African Whodunit

Buy from Amazon

The people are grief stricken after the death of a figurehead who also acted as a doctor, counsellor and psychological anchor. But Ouma’s death is not what it seems. There are hidden grievances, jealousies and desires.

Yes, an interesting sounding story but the fact was, the pace was far too slow. Large chunks of the book simply described the sluggish pace of the community where little happens. It is only at around the final third of the book that anyone gets to examine the mysterious footprints near the body.

Solving the Mystery

There is a lot of grimness and misery. Klein Samson’s love is never requited and instead he yields to hunger of heart and stomach. Ex prostitute, Cheetah is treated with disdain, and then there is the stifling loneliness of Isla. Life in the village is brutal, poverty is crippling and the landscape is cruel. There is little hope. I simply wanted the story to end and found myself resisting the temptation of skipping chapters. Others might have given in. Not a page-turner.

The Wire in the Blood by Val McDermid: Psychologist Task Force versus Serial Killer

2015-10-25T14:00:00.005-07:00

Tony Hill is a psychologist who sets a task for his team of budding police officers: to look for a pattern in the mysterious disappearances of young girls across the UK. Officer Shaz is the brightest button of the crew, pitches her theory a high-profile celeb, Jacko Vance is the killer. This propels her colleagues into laughing fits.

Only when she starts probing deeper and making enquiries does something shocking happen that demonstrates Vance’s prowess as a truly chilling killer.

Buy from Amazon

But with this revelation early in the novel, there are few other surprises in store, other than learning some of Vance’s backstory, which Tony’s team does to get a conviction.

McDermid’s character and community descriptions are vivid, and I love some her turns of phrases, which brought clear imagery. But the plot got tediously hampered by two big-footed plods who decide to freeze the task force on suspicion of murder, simply because the victim ‘knew’ her colleagues. Both plods were so big-footed, they were almost unbelievable.

And so Tony and co have to go it alone in nailing Vance. They complete an in depth profile of their subject to prove he has the disposition of the archetypal serial killer. But this alone is not enough to nail him. Time is running short in finding the location of a young girl Vance has kidnapped.

I didn’t see the relevance of a subplot involving serial arson within an industrial estate. The two stories did not link up at the end. The main plot was rather too indepth in its journey through coppers’ conversing and recapping on events. At times, I wanted the story to move on.

Vance convinced as a psychopath, a twisted mind sheltered behind ‘Teflon’ man, non-stick and too glossy in front of the cameras. But the ending heralded a question mark on whether Tony could get a conviction once they had found the girl in Vance’s house. Since Vance had sexually abused his victim and spat at her, his DNA on her body would have been in no short supply. The story was set in 1997, so DNA science was still around.

Vivid scenes and with some compelling drama, but I did feel the thriller would have been tighter with some scenes cut.

House of Small Shadows by Adam Nevill: Gothic Horror of Weird Taxidermy and Creepy Artefacts

2015-10-25T05:35:00.001-07:00

Young auctioneer, Catherine is about to start a new life working for Osberne’s Valuers and wants to prove her worth by inspecting the collections of now dead mad genius M H Mason. His niece, Edith, now in her nineties, is the sole heir at the Red House.

But Catherine has a past she wants buried. We glimpse unsettling memories of Ellyll Field, of her childhood, also known as the Hell. And we also learn about the disastrous end to her TV career, due to a bullying boss.

Gothic Horror

But Catherine is about to face her biggest challenge yet. Old Edith is anything but a pushover as she takes Catherine on a nightmare tour of her uncle’s horrible collection of nasty taxidermy and creepy old doll’s faces with eerie gazes. Nevill throws in some sinister imagery of Seventies Britain of child abductions and unsettling lullabies of ice cream vans that leaves an unsavoury taste in the mouth. Catherine soon sees a connection between her childhood ‘hell’ and the Red House.

Nevill has a writing style to rival Stephen King – his descriptions of horrors within the Red House are truly chilling and I relished some of the descriptions. But the climax of the story seemed to go on too long, and Catherine was too much a victim of circumstances, without a will of her own.

It is evident that Catherine undergoes a prolonged mental breakdown in the final scenes, but not knowing what was real left many questions unanswered. I felt the story could have been tightened and scenes cut without affecting the story.

Mystery by Peter Straub: Solid Crime Novel of an Amateur Sleuth against Corruption on Mill Walk

2015-10-25T04:00:00.001-07:00

Peter Straub is a slightly off the wall thriller writer. Kobo and Ghost Story are among my favourites. And Mystery doesn’t disappoint – one third of the Trilogy about the Blue Rose murders. This thriller could stand on its own.

Sleuth Mystery

A polished, if a little complex plot, Mystery is worth sticking with and remembering the numerous characters. The tale begins with young Tom who, after a near death accident that renders him in a wheelchair for months, takes an interest in the crimes of Mill Walk, a small Caribbean island where he lives.

But his grandfather, Glen doesn’t take to Tom’s pastime too warmly, and neither does other influential figures of the island, namely his doctor. But this doesn’t stop sleuth Tom, who collects paper clippings and interviews of the underdogs of the island.

He learns how Magnate family, the Redwings virtually own the island and keep the police force and officials in their pockets. Glen wastes no time in sending Tom to Eagle Lake on the mainland to get him out of the way.

But this doesn’t stop Tom’s snooping, and along with the enigmatic hermit, Von Heilitz uncovers further corruption on the island. Tom grows very unpopular with the Redwings, who also take vacations on Eagle Lake, (not least because of love interest’s Sarah’ preference for Tom rather than a betrothed to a Redwing).

Tom’s passion for Sarah felt a little too textbook to be convincing. Early in the story, when Tom’s lower body is swathed in plaster after his near-fatal traffic accident, he fears he had been castrated. For months, he lived with the secret fear. But didn’t react in the cathartic way I had expected when discovering he had not been castrated after all. This robotic behavior continues on-and-off throughout the story.

I grew fond of the downtrodden nurses and underdogs of Mill Walk who were incorruptible. The neighborhoods of the island created a sense of a imperfect yet colorful society that was at times alluring.

Keep Your Friends Close by Paula Daly: Flaky Family and a Female Psychopath Readable Thriller

2015-10-25T03:20:00.001-07:00

Natty, perfectionist and workaholic owns a hotel owner in Windermere along with her husband Sean, when their daughter Felicity is taken to hospital to have her appendix out. And in steps old university friend, Eve to save the day and run the business while Natty is tending to her daughter.

Readable thriller

That’s when Eve sets to work seducing Natty’s husband by giving him a blowjob to win his heart. And it seemed, he had fallen heavily for this creepy usurper of their 16 old family home. From that point, I couldn’t care for his fate as he didn’t feel real.

Daly has an easy to read writing style that is a irresistible, even when some of the events left me dissatisfied. Natty’s silly decision to lie to the police about an altercation in the car park despite it all being caught on camera for instance. What was the point of lying? And then not being discrete enough about her secret enquiries about Eve’s past. Natty seemed to have chucked in logic for total meltdown.

Natty’s two daughters seem to accept Eve too readily despite Eve’s creepy behavior and Sean grew ever more oblivious to Eve’s scheming. Incredibly, the two daughters seem to accept Eve’s presence in the house whilst their mother has gone missing. The elder, Alice even hugs Eve when Alice's poor mother was trying to find the truth about Eve. Surely the daughters would form a united front against this usurper of their home?

Natty’s dad was the most likable character of the story, having more sense than the rest of them put together despite boozing and smoking weed. Joanne, the copper assigned to investigate also had a cool head, and could have saved a lot of grief if Natty had trusted her from the start.

Eve reminded me of Amy from Gone Girl, only Flynn’s female psychopath was a little more believable. Eve had similar thoughts as Amy about acting like the ‘cool girl’, acting out the ideal girlfriend that every fella wants.

Overplayed Pop Songs I Never Want to Hear Again: Golden Oldies that have Gone Mouldy

2015-10-05T14:46:00.000-07:00

Why do radio stations play the same one-hundred or so oldies over and over when there are so many lovely classics that hardly get an air play? Here is a list of old pop songs I would happy never have to hear again for my entire lifetime: the same chords, repetitive, cheesy, whatever. I don’t hate them, I simply don’t want to hear them anymore.

Anything by Spandau Ballet

Buy from Amazon

Gold (forever played in events involving gold, Olympics), True, I’ll Fly for You, to Cut a Long Story Short, Communication, Lifeline, yes, even Through the Barricades. Their tunes do the opposite to making the hairs stand on the back of my neck. Spandau’s make the hairs on the back of my neck flatten right down.

Banshee Wails to Chuck in the Slush

Not so much overplayed, I simply don't want to hear them anymore: Smalltown Boy by Bronski Beat, Seven Days by Craig David, Dry your Eyes by The Streets, Earth Song by Michael Jackson, Mull of Kintyre by Wings, You’re Beautiful by James Blunt.

Eighties Chunks

Most songs by ABC, Duran Duran, the Human League, Frankie Goes to Hollywood, and mixes by Stock, Aitken and Waterman.

Most Songs by Dire Straits Sultans of Swing, Walk of Life, Money for Nothing, Tunnel of Love, Private Investigations, Brothers in Arms. Huge in the eighties, what was the fuss all about?

Eighties Bowie. His earlier stuff was edgier. Shame he opted for snappy suits and Tin Machine with tinny melodies: Let’s Dance, Modern Love, China Girl. After the first bar, time to turn that dial.

Songs that Have Bent my Ears One Time Too Many

Wake me Up Before You Go Go by Wham, Shiny Happy People by REM, Maneater by Hall and Oates, Park Life by Blur, Come On Eileen, Dexy’s Midnight Runners, Tainted Love by Soft Cell, Love Shack by B52s, (Is this the Way to) Amarillo by Tony Christie, most songs by Westlife (Living without Wings), Angels by Robbie Williams, Every Breath You Take by the Police, The Final Countdown by Europe.

And Don’t Fear the Reaper by Blue Oyster Cult. Yes, it has a loyal following with Seventies luvvies, but the middle bit drones on and on and on....and on...and on.

Songs that Are Simply Over Played

Shame I have to include these as they are not bad songs, just overplayed by jocks who cannot delve deeper into the album from whence they came: Hotel California by the Eagles, The Joker by Steve Miller Band, Sweet Home Alabama by Lynyrd Skynyrd, Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen, Stairway to Heaven by Led Zeppelin, Walk This Way by Aerosmith, Livin’ on a Prayer by Bon Jovi, Band of Gold by Freda Payne, Boys of Summer Don Henley, Riders on the Storm by the Doors and others I have missed, no doubt.

Where has all the Non Padded Bras Gone? Invasion of the Padded Cups

2015-10-05T07:05:00.002-07:00

Shops stocking lingerie seem to be sending the message that all women want bigger boobs. Er, no. Some women simply want a bra that offers support and comfort. What do I see when I venture into the high street shop stocking lingerie? Racks and racks of padded bras. No non-padded bras to be seen.

Doreen Bra non padded
Click to buy from Amazon

Bras with a Padded Big Cup

I decided to try George at Asda the other day to be confronted with further racks of padded bras, every colour, support and style. I couldn’t find a normal bra anywhere. Yes, I could find sports bras, but you have to be a contortionist to get them on), and I could find kid’s bras (some of these were padded! Padded bras for twelve-year-olds, I ask you). But no other choice of bra.

When I asked the shop assistant where I could find a non padded bra for adults, she said the padded bras were what the ‘younger generation’ wanted.

I see.

So us over-thirties don’t count, in the consumer demographic? So George only cater for the teenie chavs who want a 34 inch Zbust? Shame on you, Asda!

Where to Get Non Padded Bras

The terrible fact is, it seems all the other supermarkets are up to the same trick! Not only Adsa, but Tesco, Primark and other high street fashion shops. They are catering mostly for the female consumer who wants a breast augmentation. This is a terrible message to send the average female consumer who already has image hangups.

The message I would like to send to George at Asda and co, is: not all women want to look like Jodie Marsh! I like how I look and most women do too. They want an ordinary bra that offers support, comfort and most of all, retain the body image nature gave us.

Where to Find Non Padded Brazier

Bras to Enlarge the Cup

In the quest for the elusive non padded bra, I went to Debenhams. They stocked a couple of Doreen bras, which looked the ticket, but they were £30 each! I went into Co-op and found the same deal. Once you could find a couple of non padded bras quite cheaply, but not anymore. No pad, no bra.

I had to go online to buy my non padded bras, and they were £15 a pair cheaper than in Debenhams. Do the shops not realise, that boobs without proper support can cause back trouble? Maternity units in hospitals will testify. Some women don’t like having big boobs, and they don’t like having no support in the chest area either. I think fake boobs out of proportion to the body looks ugly.

But I found even big-cupped bras were padded. Is no boob big enough not to warrant a padded bra?

I went into the average market town on a quest for an ordinary non padded bra with support non-wired. I would have thought most women could find such an essential item like as a pair of comfy socks or a sun hat. But no pad, no bra.

I sincerely hope this exclusive choice of padded bras in shops will be gone. Begone along with the horrible message this is sending the female consumer. Not all of us want huge tits! Bring back the non padded bra!

Overrated Chocolate Bars: Review from a Chocolate Lover

2015-10-05T05:47:00.001-07:00

Has the taste of chocolate in the UK chocolate bar grown increasingly insipid? I used to like the chocolate bars displayed on the shop counters: Kit Kat, Twix, Minstrels and so forth, but nowadays, I eat them for the sugar rush, floundering for the chocolate flavor, then immediately regret eating them for the disappointment.

Has the Recipe of Chocolate Bars Changed?

Yum. Click2buy from Amazon

These high street chocolate bars taste more like sweet milk, bland. And as for the ‘layer’ of chocolate over the nougat or biscuit, about as thick as one micron, could you really technically call it a ‘chocolate’ bar? More like mostly-milk-sugar-biscuit with one milligram of chocolate included.

I can still taste other foods like I used to, but now find myself opting for the posh chocs like Thornton’s, (I luv them Sevilles) Green & Blacks or Marks & Spencer’s selection rather than touch the bars on offer at the supermarket counter. But of the bad bunch, Cadbury’s are still the best.

Milk chocolate remains my favourite. But I feel chocolate really comes into its own when combined with another ingredient like hazelnuts, orange or a little biscuit. Similarly, beef isn’t so interesting on its own; it needs a little mustard or horseradish sauce to bring it out. So what is going on with the chocolate bar in supermarkets with the nuts, biscuit and caramel? They don’t have much chocolaty taste, and like they certainly don't taste like they used to.

Here’s my List of Overrated Chocolate Bars in the UK.

Bounty Bar: chocolate over coconut flakes that loses flavor so quickly, it feels more like flaked skin caught between the teeth. Wait a minute, perhaps I had just chewed a fingernail!

Minstrels: The shells are more brittle than flaked bone and the chocolate taste sought after is washed away quicker than shit in a rainstorm.

No Chocolate Flavor

Snickers: The Marathon of olde. Peanuts glued together with a brown paste that sticks to your teeth along with a broken nut or two – or was that a filling that just came out? Never mind, just wash it down with hot tea then let the plaque commence!

Ditto for Lion Bar, Picnic, Star Bar, Toffee Crisp, Topic and Double Decker only with various blends of nougat, rice crispies, nuts, biscuit and bits of dried fruit designed to snuggle into every crevasse of your mouth. I wouldn’t mind this so much, if I didn’t mourn for the chocolate taste. Where did the chocolate go? Nothing but a sweet sludge on the tongue!

Maltesers: An inferior version of the Crunchie, without any chocolate flavour only a gluey maltcomb centre that sticks around longer than a fart smell in a lift.

Revels: Once my childhood favourite, but now, is a parody of itself. Once, the centres were the whole point of Revels. The orange centre was once the best. Now it is an overstatement with a chemical aftertaste. Not a good combination with that gluey maltcomb, bits of nut and dried fruit. And there are hardly any in a packet! What a swizz! Shame on you, Revels!

Twix: Come on, it’s not a chocolate bar, it’s 99.99999% biscuit and caramel, and 0.00000001% chocolate. No chocolate flavour to speak of, only very bland biscuit and an overly-sweet caramel. Ditto for Breakaway and Penguin,

Kit Kat: See above, only with a slightly thicker chocolate coating. Nice if you happen to get a rogue one that has no biscuit, only choc.

Milky Way: Texture like polystyrene that slides between your teeth, leaving a weird aftertaste. Good for wallpapering perhaps.

Smarties: Yes, the orange ones used to taste the best, but not anymore. The shells seem more brittle than of old and the chocolate tastes like the Easter egg chocolate that is 'flavored' rather than real chocolate.

Bournville: Please, it’s just medicine for upping your iron count, isn’t it? At least this one hasn’t changed in decades. But then, who cares?

Mars: Toffee with that Milky Way polystyrene that turns to sludge in your trap. Has a loyal following but I no-like. Best stick it in fried breadcrumbs like they do up North or feed it to the pigeons.

Yorkie: Not chocolaty. Just very sweet, very brown and very chunky. Like a Chippendale without the brawn.

Galaxy: Silky, melting, like their seductive adverts but leaving an insipid, milky taste. Shame. The Galaxy caramel is simply....sickly. Ditto for Rolos and chocolate eggs (filled I believe with white and yellow icing sugar).

Milky Bar: Revoltingly sweet and milky. Well, it is a milky bar after all. But it’s not white chocolate. It’s just....well white – or rather an off-white buff. A buff ‘chocolate’ bar without the chocolate.

The Best Chocolates out of a Bad Bunch

Aero, Wispa, chocolate buttons, Ripple, Flake, Drifters and Crunchie (although the honeycomb centre sticks like glue). At least they have some flavor of chocolate that lingers longer than most.

The Truth About Chocolate Bars

It seems the consumer can be fooled by adverts: the suggestion, the colour of the wrapper, the appearance of the bar, the product description and worst of all, the ‘retro bar’ label. It’s been there since my childhood, therefore it is an old favorite. Only, it isn't anymore. The recipe has changed.

But let’s take all that away. The taste buds have the last say. Chocolate bars have changed in my opinion and I have heeded my taste buds. I rarely buy those chocs from the supermarket like I used to. I have decided to go upmarket. Maybe it is because I am a chocolate lover that I have decided to give up on the chocolate bar found on the supermarket counters.