PEACE from 6 Pieces

my suicide letter that led the cops to my front door

2018-04-11T18:25:00.001-06:00

11 months ago...
I was in an emotional dark place with a concussion, just detoxed off some harsh meds to put my Ulcerative Colitis in remission for a minute, difficult emotional repercussions of my divorce, kids emotionally struggling to process our new normal, one kid dealing with PTSD and one bi-polar disorder and then me still believing beliefs of old stories my subconscious had created to keep me safe but was now holding me back. All of this and probably more that I've let go, led to this letter being written after I'd heard a number of adults saying or writing on social media "I just don't understand how someone commits suicide. They are so selfish."
Since I'd been dealing with the mind numbing thoughts of suicide for 5 months at that point I wondered how someone couldn't understand how suicide becomes the only option and why they thought it was selfish.
My thoughts were far from selfish. So I wrote this letter to explain the darkness and help others understand the thoughts.

Suicide only becomes an option when all hope is lost and you are in the dark.

Hope exists when you can see light on the other side, an idea that a little bit of change

will happen and there will be light.

Change will happen by asking for help and help is granted or even possible.

Change will happen when you make decisions to change the scenario

dynamics so you can feel the light.

Hope is lost when you've asked for help and there isn't anything or

anyone can do other than be you better than you. Help is not possible.

Hope is lost when you've made decisions and caused change but the abuse

continues so the pain and suffering continue.

Hope is lost when there isn't enough change that could make everything alright.

Hope is lost when you accept you are the problem for those you love the most not the answer.

Hope is lost when there is no light to be seen because none exists.

From the outside you may feel this is wrong and there is always hope

but the hope you may see is not an actual scenario you can live with

therefore all options other than not living are gone.

Suicide is the option.

Life has asked me to climb many mountains and I have risen to every occasion to the

best of my ability and yet I've failed. People say to me I don't know how you're dealing with it all.

I'm not! I've failed at it all.

Life has finally handed me all it has so far and I can't go on. I have nothing left.

The saying goes "leave it all on the field".

I feel I have. I've lost my love, my health, my strength, my faith, my hope.

Hope is gone.

All that's left is to let the scenario I can't live with go on without me.

-Cobilynn Dickinson 5/10/17

I sent the letter to my therapist without the explanation that these are the thoughts I'd like to discuss at our visit the next day. So without that caveat it seemed like a suicide note and she did her job and called the police after she couldn't get a hold of me. Wow, was I surprised to see the cops at my door ready to take me to the hospital. It took a lot to convince them I would be ok for the night. I am grateful those men showed up to save my life. It was good to know they would show up if I needed them.

My pain and darkness was causing those I loved the pain, I hated that. I lost hope. There was no more hope that my life would ever change because I couldn't change those around me that were causing the pain. The next day in therapy, my angel therapist looked me in the eye and said "you either go to a wellness center, maybe "the work" for at least a week or I commit you into a mental hospital for your own safety." Ugh! Tears streaming down my face I knew she was right and agreed to find a place to go within the week or go to the hospital.

This is where Alicia Thompson walks into my life by recommendation from my therapist. Alicia is certified in "The Work" facilitation. "The Work" is the use of the Byron Katie's four questions from her book Loving What Is. I met with Alicia twice a week for months, questioning every stressful thought I had. Of course I continued to see my therapist and do EMDR, trauma therapy work. These two things along with meditation/self care I began to take back my power that I had given to everyone around me.

Now...

I know giving my power away is what led me to loosing faith in myself, hopelessness and suicidal thoughts. I couldn't change anyone but myself. I've learned that wanting to change anyone else or blaming others is one way of giving my power away and that is what is painful. Although I understood that statement I didn't know how to change myself, my way of thinking or the beliefs I'd held my whole life that were now keeping me from reality and truth.

This last year has been filled with a lot of mental work that has led me to loving who I am, loving my body, being the mom I always wanted to be (wether my kids validate my efforts or not), finding a spirituality that is more true to me than anything else ever before and HOPE or KNOWLEDGE that this life is here for me to play with not the other way around.

This is my experience as I see it now. Yes there is a lot more involved in the last year and a half that could possibly make for a possibly entertaining book like Aleisha McDaniel said but that will have to wait a bit, I'm working some other magic at the moment.

Why didn't I share my story till now? I was afraid someone would use it against me. I'm no longer afraid of that person so I'm sharing it now.

My March for Women's Rights

2017-01-21T16:00:00.000-07:00

Why I March for Women's Rights...

"Women deserve to live full and healthy lives, free of all forms of violence against our bodies. Today women around the world are marching for parity and equity for all women’s rights. Women's rights are human rights, regardless of a woman’s race, ethnicity, religion, immigration status, sexual identity, gender expression, economic status, age or disability. "-womensmarch.com

I march today to change the rhetoric of Marital/Intimate Partner rape, sexual abuse and/or sexual assault. I am frightened of the hurt or betrayal some may feel by me sharing my voice but I can not be silent any more. I will not be afraid. This is my truth as I have lived and survived it.

Common Belief

Some have lost their belief or may have never believed in the basic human right that No ONE has the right to any physical contact or sexual act with their body without their consent. There is a mindset in our world that by being married it automatically gives consent to any and all sexual acts at the desire of an intimate partner at anytime or place. This is not true. No means No, even in MARRIAGE & PARTNERSHIP. No one has the right to physical contact, penetration or to force themselves on any one else without mutual consent not even your intimate partner. A majority of society thinks that sexual consent looks like anyone of these excuses or many others...

Appeasement because you don't want to fight with your partner.
Appeasement due to guilt or shame.
If you're naked, you're asking for it.
If you're changing in front of your partner, you've given an open invitation.
If you're asleep or incapacitated, it's ok to do whatever with their body.

THIS IS NOT CONSENT! This is Intimate Partner/Marital rape, sexual abuse and/or sexual assault. To understand the definition of these visit this page.

Results of Marital Sexual Violence

Statistics show that marital sexual violence may result in more damage than stranger rape because victims may have difficulty identifying the acts for what they are so the sexual violence repeats for years without being acknowledged or because of the deep betrayal of a trusted partner. An intimate relationship is just that intimate and vulnerable and this person that you've trusted with your heart and soul has now taken all safety, trust, respect and self worth away from you.

My Acceptance of My Marital Sexual Violence

I bought into the common belief. I know that there are so many out there that believe this because it's all we've ever known.

It wasn't until my (now former) husband and I decided to separate that the line in my head became clear. Clear that if we are not together he has no right to my body. So 7 days later when he assaulted me I was in shock. When it happened I wasn't even sure I could label it as sexual assault, I just knew I felt dirty, used and worthless. I couldn't accept that my own husband would take advantage of me. The following week in my therapists office as I explained what happened I had to ask her to label it for me. When she uttered the words "You were sexually assaulted. Your husband sexually assaulted you." I fell apart and have only come to accept that this has been apart of my marriage for as long as I can remember. The acceptance of past and present marital sexual assault/rape became my reality.

When I finally accepted that sexual assault and abuse were apart of my past marriage and bravely opened up to my closest friends and church/Priesthood leaders I was shamed as they said "Why do you think you were sexually assaulted what happened? Well what were YOU doing? What were you doing to make him think he could do that? I thought you guys were changing clothes in front of each other at the time, so..? I just can’t believe he would do such a thing, he’s usually such a nice/respectful/righteous man."

If someone has the courage to share that they were sexually assaulted it means that they are certain this is the case, they aren't lying and are scared people won't believe them. No one has the right to question if it's true or under what circumstances in happened. These responses to someone saying they were sexually assaulted minimize the act, shame the person and do more harm.

Law Enforcement acceptance: rarely is martial/partner sexual violence reported or prosecuted because having concrete evidence is difficult to find and prove and sometimes isn't even taken seriously by law enforcement. Divorce courts don't deem abuse as a result of fault or see a need to help victims.

My religion acceptance: The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, my experience has been that abuse of all kinds is not deemed a sin or given any sort of condemning to any of my abusers. Yes the church states that abuse is not tolerated but actions speak louder than words and on more than one occasion in my life a blind eye has been turned to the physical, emotional, verbal and sexual abuse by "worthy Priesthood" holders.

Where does one turn for safety and peace when the people and institutions we rely on to share our secrets and to hold people accountable for violence and sin don't do it? It creates the rape accepted society we have today because their is no accountability. This has been a harsh and difficult reality for me to accept and the reason I am writing and marching today.

Our rape accepted society that we live in has got to STOP today! It is accepted when we minimize experiences, shame victims and abusers are not held accountable.

In this shame, guilt and denial victims can sometimes never become survivors.

We all deserve to be WARRIOR SURVIVORS.

How to Support Friends and Family to be Survivors

"Most people who have experienced sexual violence choose to tell someone close to them. This will be someone who they feel safe enough with to disclose the abuse that they have experienced. They need to believe that the person they are confiding in is trust-worthy, will believe them, and will keep the information they give confidential. As a ‘safe’ person to tell, you are an important source of support.

Listen - Listen to what they have to say and let them take their time. It might not be easy for them to start talking about an event especially if it is something that they may have kept silent about for a long time.
Believe – People rarely lie about sexual assault or abuse. It is important to believe what the person is saying.
Respect – It is important to respect their feelings and their decisions. If they feel like crying, let them, it can be part of their healing process.
Recognize – The courage it takes for a person to speak must be recognized and praised. It takes a great deal of courage to face up to fears and also to talk about any sexual experience.
Don’t judge – It is important to be accepting of the way the person reacts, even if this is not what you were expecting. It is best to get rid of any ideas you may have of how a person who has been sexually assaulted should behave, and to accept their reactions as normal.
Remember – It is not their fault – no one asks to be sexually assaulted or deserves it and they cannot be blamed for not preventing it. The blame lies with the rapist. Reassure them that no one has the right to rape or assault anyone no matter what the circumstances were.

Make time to listen if they wish to talk. Take your cue from them as to how much, how often, and when they want to talk about it. Do not force them to talk if they do not want to. It may be very difficult for you to empathize with what the person has experienced. It is important to support them in getting help and information from WMRSASC or any Rape Crisis Centre and other supportive friends and support services. Most people, once the initial shock and trauma has worn off, want their friend or relative to be ‘better’ or back to ‘normal’. However, any sexual assault significantly changes your perception of life and of the world you live in. There is no time limit after which they should have recovered. Each individual person learns to cope with the experience in their life according to their individual circumstances. This can take months or years."-West Mercia Rape and Sexual Abuse Support Centre

Now that you know what to do CHANGE the rhetoric

No means No, even in MARRIAGE & PARTNERSHIP

My 2017 One Word

2017-01-01T17:20:00.002-07:00

I'm not going to lie, this one is very hard for me. Last year I debated not picking a word but knew long before January what the word would be so I went with it. This last month I have fought off every inkling of idea of a word for 2017. I'm just wasn't sure I wanted to have a clear focus but as the first few seconds of 2017 rang in I knew my word, CLARITY.

I know this word will take on lots of different meanings over the year but the biggest idea or definition that is shouting at me today is that I first need to find clarity in being transparent and clear in my understanding of my self, health, spiritual, relationships and financial standing as of today.

Today I share with you my naked vulnerable true CLARITY. I know as I am vulnerable I give my thoughts and ideas to the world, which can then return to my open heart, mind and soul to help, heal and inspire me.

Enjoying new found self and acceptance as I know longer live in a box that someone else created for me to live in. I LIKE ME! I like my values, my beliefs, what I stand for and the purpose I have here on earth. Learning to love myself in a way that I only accept the kind of love from me and others that I'm worth. I WORTH it! Feeding this love through studying and self care is what keeps me capable to keep going everyday. How do you love you?

Health? I'm SICK, ugh I don't want to talk about this but I need to say something because my usual invisible disease, Ulcerative Colitis, has overtaken my face as it continues to retain water swelling to a size where I no longer recognize the person in the mirror. (yes, I fight off tears every day and yes, I know it could be worse) My disease and I hit rock bottom after being in a flare for over a year, the week before Thanksgiving. UC is a really shitty disease (pun intended because I hate talking about my disease and what it does). I would wish it on my enemies (if I had any). Stress is the main cause of a flare so with all going on this last year it's been very difficult on my body. At Thanksgiving the only option was to go on prednisone (a strong anti inflammatory) that will hopefully put me into remission by February. However the side effects of this drug are super fun (NOT, the water retention hurts, I sweat profusely {EW! gross}, I'm loosing my hair, etc.) and have left me wondering Whose face is this???

This new year I will be weaning off the prednisone, cleansing, exercising, trying some new western meds (Protandem) and open to anything else you want to share with me. How do you stay healthy? Are you fighting for your life? How do you fight peacefully? How do you reduce stress?

Spiritually I feel like my relationship with God is better than it's been in years even though that doesn't look like the picture perfect mormon church ad I've subscribed to in the past and totally support my family and friends in doing what's right for them. I don't know if I'll ever want that picture again. If I do I will be true to myself and go with it, but for now that's not it. My knowledge of truth, light and love are what I live by. This keeps me grounded and raw in the truth of God as we are all ONE. I'm open to truth and light in all forms even from others, I love that special friends can look into my soul and share with me insights to help me understand myself and see what I need. I want more of this in my life. How do you fill your spiritual bucket?

Motherhood is a choice everyday to be present. My children are going through so much right now individually, on top of their parents getting divorced and dad getting remarried all within 3 months, its left us all spinning wildly trying to find a new normal. As the mom these past few months I've spent most of my hours sustaining my children's emotional well being and physical needs. Which makes all the stuff above even more important to have in order.

Relationships can come in many forms and are said to be the most important thing here on earth. I cherish the people in my life and enjoy serving them. I am open to what comes my way. I'm taking one day at a time and accepting what comes with open arms. I don't want to deny myself what I'm worth wether that comes now or later. I will cultivate richer relationships in all aspects of my life. How do you cultivate deep meaningful relationships?

Financially I am sure I need to stick to a budget, JESS help! (haha) I sold my half of the company so I am looking for the next thing for me either as an entrepreneur or employee in order to provide financially for me. It's important to me that whatever it is I do I use my strengths and talents in a position where I GIVE and RECEIVE equally. My dream opportunity is to run a philanthropic organization I believe in. Therefore I am working on my own called Power Play, an indoor playground with a focus on nuerodiverse acceptance. I've also applied to The Younique Foundation. I hope for and would love to see both of these become a reality soon.

This is my CLARITY today, January 1st, 2017.

Now I stretch my arms open wide and ask for the light and love needed to fulfill my purpose. I need you, angels and God to help me achieve all I need to.

#Clarity2017 #gettingClear

GLAD 2015

2015-01-12T13:32:00.001-07:00

My one little word for 2015 is...

This word, GLAD, has been stuck in my head for the last month or so but I didn't think it would be my word until last week when it all came together and I decided I wanted to play The Glad Game all year!

I know and have always known that life is not easy, however I didn't think that some days would be so hard. I have always believed life could be amazing and still do. Now I just accept that every joy has it's equal and opposite amount of sorrow.

2014 was a year of accepting a lot of hard things. I realized I'm good at always looking forward to better days but not necessarily being happy in my difficult trials and was just waiting for it to be over so I could then be happy. When trials start with hours and turn into days and months and sometime years you can't wait to be happy. You've got to find happiness in the moment and sometimes even gratitude for it. (Did I just say that. Ugh! Haha) I've read many times this last year about how we should be grateful for our trials and I've had mixed feelings about it. I'm not grateful for all my trials. Some of them have strengthened me and others have torn me to pieces. It is the latter ones that are the most difficult to let go and be grateful for. But this year I want to choose how I react to the difficult moments in my life. Even if they last awhile they are still moments and pieces of our lives not all encompassing unless we let it become so.

This year I'm going to play The Glad Game, yep the very one Pollyanna taught us to play so many years ago. I have done this a few times mostly with sarcasm and it always lifts my spirits. This year I will still use sarcasm because it's a riot but I will also look for sincere things to be glad about even in my dark hours. I would LOVE for you to play with me, sarcasm and all. Wouldn't it be amazing if the world was a little bit more GLAD because we all play this game together. Join me! Use the hashtag

#thegladgame2015

and tag me in your posts so we can all be glad together.

I wish you all the gladness in the world.

Xoxo

2014 Warrior Reflection

2014-12-31T17:52:00.001-07:00

My one little 2014 word has been WARRIOR. I knew that this was the word for me this year but I have to admit it made me nervous. I worried about why I needed to be a warrior this year and what exactly it would entail. The definition of warrior I chose was...

"Warriors are not born and they are not made...Warriors create themselves through trial and error, pain and suffering, and their ability to conquer their own faults." -unknown

Oh man have I found this to be true. I made a list of the faults I would focus on and knew there would be others I would need to accept along the way. I sit here now to tell you that I have conquered...a few of them. Haha I have however worked on all of them and will continue.

As it is the final day of 2014 I feel the need to close up this year with a reflection on some of what has been created and conquered. I believe that I am a Warrior as I had learned through trial and error, pain and suffering and worked on conquering my faults.

1) I created a home for my family and I that we all feel safe, inspired and loved in. This move for my family was not far but nessesary for all of us to grow in ways we could not have imagined.

In the process of creating this home inside and out I realized I'd let others opinions and thoughts of me and my abilities make me feel less than I am. As I became more confidant in my interior design skills I shed layers of self doubt and the need for others validation. I love the home I've created and am grateful for all that I've been given.

2) Autism Gala and Events conquered and in the books with my gals. These events are a lot of work but when it all comes together I am overwhelmed and thrilled with all that we created and conquered. I am also stunned and humbled by the amount of love from family and friends who volunteer, attend and donate to our cause. I am truly grateful.

3) It was a thrill and honor to be apart of Megan Pyrah, BrassyApple's, I Am Brave and Beautiful movment to empower women.

4) After multiple escapes, one cop ride and 2 drownings the fact that all of us (family and friends) especially Hagen conquered the summer is something for us all to rejoice over. I can't even think back to 4 months ago without my stomach turning in knots and my heart start pounding with anxiety. We did it! It's over! He's moved on to other death defying tricks.

Me & My Buddy

5) I have had the opportunity to learn more about my body, what triggers ulcerative colitis flare ups and how to manage my stress in order to be healthy. I have not been perfect on my trek but I am continuing to learn and grow. Creating cleaner eating habits and finding a new medicine, Laminine, have helped me feel my best. Thank for those of you who have shared your knowledge and care with me.

6) People need people. I have learned so much from the people that waltz in and out of my life. If our minds are open to learning from others we will. If we give each other the benefit of the doubt and accept that we all have something great to give to will all become more accepting and understanding. I am a better human being because of all of you in my life. Here are a only a few highlights of those I've learned from.

7) Creating time with my girls has been a joy and trial as I navigate through these new waters of teenage hormones and needs. I love them more than words and I want them to be their best selves. I love the times we have jam out in the car, bust out in song at any given moment, being teased about how old I'm getting, teasing about boys and awkward selfies.

8) Conquering my dream of being a "Jet Setter" came true this year thanks to all the time spent as a single mom as my husband lives his dreams all over the world, I reap the benefits of sky miles. I was able to make a few 24hr hour trips just for an out of town concert or a quick sister visit. I'm grateful for this time to just be ME and the people that make it possible.

9) One thing I have not conquered but recognized more than ever this year is the need to...

...accept where we are in life, not where we imagined we should be.

...trust myself and the divine gifts that I've been given.

These are important and key to peace. I will keep working on these.

10) Speak only Truth was one of the abilities I wanted to conquer. It's not like I'm a compulsive liar or even think I have a lying problem, it is more than lying or not. Speaking the truth to me means to speak your heart, to uplift others only, stand up for what I believe and share love through words. I wouldn't say that I had this in the forefront of my mind everyday but I would look at my list of goals throughout the year and be reminded. I am not perfect but just having this as a goal has created the ability to see truth and the desire to have it around me always.

I'm not big on New Year Resolutions but picking my one little word every year gives me a focus on how to be better than I have been in the past. I highly suggest making goals whatever way works for you and your life.

Happy New Year!!!

Hexagon Wall Art

2014-11-01T17:03:00.001-06:00

It might take me awhile to put something on my walls, but when I do I LOVE it! I wondered if this would be weird but then I realized this is my kind of art, simple, clean and different.

Tutorial

1) I had the hexagons frames made for me by the wonderful man, Kevin, at The Wood Connection (a local Utah wood shop).

2) I picked out all different kinds of fabrics (fur, leather, linen, patterned cotton).

3) Cut the fabric the shape of the hexagon with enough fabric to fold it over the frame and staple.

4) Start stapling on one flat end in the middle and then staple that edge 1in. apart. Then go to the opposite flat side and do the same. Then work your way around pulling fabric tight with each staple.

A Far Reach

2014-11-01T16:24:00.001-06:00

Thank you to everyone who shared, posted and liked our I Am Brave and Beautiful stories. Megan followed her inspiration and I was blessed to join in the plans. I am so grateful to be able to share my thoughts and feelings with all of you. Thank you for sharing your stories with us. You have strengthened me and my girls. Women need Women to uplift and inspire one another. THANK YOU!!

I am Brave and Beautiful

2014-09-29T04:00:00.000-06:00

I am Brave and Beautiful - a beauty movement that is sweeping the globe. Colbie Caillat started it with her recent song and video called TRY. My blogging friend Megan of Brassy Apple wanted to push this movement along and invited women from all over to share what they looked like without make up and I joined in!! Colbie's song says, "Take your make up off. Let your hair down... Look into the mirror at yourself, Do you like you? Cause I like you... "

Megan and I have been the team behind this whole project. Our worldwide vision included creating our own video inspired by the song TRY. The talent of Robbins Creative made it possible for us to pull it off. You have to click play and see the beauty and bravery displayed and you might even recognize a few faces in there.

Me along with 101+ other blogging women from different backgrounds, religions, ethnicities, ages, shapes and sizes have decided to be Brave and Beautiful! You can join in this movement too by sharing what you look like without makeup on. You don't need a blog either! Just tag your photo with #IamBraveAndBeautiful on Instgram and search the hashtag to see who else has joined in. ALSO, if you tag it with a second hashtag - #ColbieTRY we just might be able to get Colbie Caillat's attention since she was the inspiration behind it all!

Are you brave and beautiful? I am, here I go!

In these two photos you can see a significant difference around my eyes, my wrinkles, smile lines, crows feet whatever you want to call them I have them in one picture and not in the other. I like the natural one better. Yep, I said natural is better. Why? Why am I ok with the wrinkles? Because I don't see them as wrinkles I see them as my WARRIOR lines. These wrinkles are a direct result of every smile and tear shed in my life. They are the result of a life well lived, full of meaning, deepened with every sorrow and extended with every joy. I look forward to being old and wrinkly because it is my outward testament of a great life, a warrior's life.

I think the only thing we have to "TRY" to do is own who we are. We are who we are because our families, friends, neighbors, strangers and the world needs us to be who we are. We don't have to "...TRY so hard", like Colbie Calliat says, because all we have to do is be ourselves. We each have strengths, talents, weaknesses and failures unique to us in order for us to learn, grow and accomplish our unique purpose here on earth. If we need makeup or no makeup in order to feel like our true self then that is what we need to do.

There are a lot of people, images and messages in our lives that will try to tear us down. They try to make us believe that we are not valued. We need, no we have to shut those messages out of our lives! In Coblie's song she says, "take your makeup off", to me the word makeup can be literal and it can be whatever or whoever is holding you back from liking you. We need to find and own the value of how we look, what our talents are and what our purpose is. Once we understand these things we will fly with self worth, light and truth and we will change the world one tiny insignificant moment at a time and live a warrior's life.
(Thank you Lindsay Black for taking my natural photo.)

Don't stop here. Get clicking around - its a blog hop! Below are more brave and beautiful women bearing more than their natural beauty. They each have a little bit of their heart to share with you. Some get very personal. Some share stories. For some this was very hard to do yet they gathered their courage and did it anyway. We hope as you click around (and YES pin these different posts!) you will feel the importance of it, the empowering effect it has and that it encourages you in some way.

>>>>>>>Important info! Blog Hops often have glitches the first day. If the link has an ERROR, simply click on the HOME button for each site, or google the blog name next to the link, and you should see their brave and beautiful post there. Links will be updated as soon as possible.<<<<<<<<<<<<

1. BrassyApple 2. Peace from 6 Pieces 3. Is this Really My Life 4. Among the Young 5. Love Me Dani Marie 6. Sweet Charli 7. Kim Orlandini 8. XO, Ashton Tilton 9. She Calls Me Mama Leisha 10. Raising Memories - Canada 11. A Little Tipsy 12. Amy Cornwell 13. A girl and a glue gun 14. My Craftily Ever After 15. Maybe I Will 16. WhipperBerry 17. Paging SuperMom 18. All Things Thrifty 19. Ashlee Marie 20. The Project Girl

21. One Little Momma 22. Entirely Eventful Day 23. Diary of a Brown Eyed Girl 24. Tips from a Typical Mom 25. Utah Sweet Savings 26. Flats to Flip Flops 27. One Krieger Chick 28. What Meegan Makes 29. Simply Kierste 30. Live to be Inspired 31. HoneyBear Lane 32. Pretty Providence 33. Ma Nouvelle Mode - in FRANCE 34. MomEntity 35. Serger Pepper - in ITALY 36. Kiki and Company 37. Girl Loves Glam 38. Thrive

39. The Potters Place 40. Crafting in the Rain 41. Cooking With Ruthie 42. Delineate Your Dwelling 43. The Pennington Point 44. Bakerette 45. The Happy Scraps 46. Shannon Baird Photography 47. Tried and Tasty 48. Lionesses at the Gate 49. Fry Sauce and Grits 50. Lolly Jane 51. That's What Che Said 52. Sugar Bee Crafts 53. Your HomeBased Mom 54. Happiness is Homemade 55. The Crafted Sparrow 56. R&R Workshop 57. I Should Be Mopping the Floor 58. Sassy Steals

59. Let's Eat Grandpa 60. Being Spiffy 61. Sumo's Sweet Stuff 62. Ginger Snap Crafts 63. Bless This Mess 64. Apronista 65. Dreaming About Someday 66. Frenchie 67. Tastefully Frugal 68. Four Marrs and One Venus 69. Your Sister Circle 70. Over the Big Moon 71. See Vanessa Craft 72. Infarrantly Creative 73. Family StoryTelling

74. Albion Gould 75. Life as Mrs. Larson 76. Tried and True 77. Play.Party.Pin. 78. Bite of Delight 79. Ink Happi 80. ObSEUSSed 81. U Create 82. My Mommy Style 83. Find it Make it Love it 84. The Contractor Chronicles 85. Novae Clothing 86. Mommy Makes Things 87. At Home with Sweet T 88. We Like to Learn As We Go 89. House for Five 90. Organize and Decorate Everything 91. Sassy Southern Gurl 92. The Creative Mom 93. Keep Moving Forward with Me

94. The Benson Street 95. Mom 4 Real 96. Sowdering About 97. illistyle 98. The Crafty Blog Stalker 99. A Fiery Red Life 100. Cupcakes & Crowbars 101. One Sweet Appetite 102. My DayLights 103. Restless Risa

104. Sypsie Designs 105. Vintage Mother 106. Like Mother Like Daughter 107. 30 Handmade Days 108. Queen B and Me 109. Apples by Ashley 110. Boutique Cafe - in CANADA 111. Just My Little Mess 112. Bombshell Bling 113. Sarah Tyau 114. Taradara Make it 115. Capturing Joy 116. Ivory Lime Photography 117. Jenkins Kid Farm 118. Free Time Frolics 119. Bella Storia 120. Dana Ohlsen Photography

Ready in join in?Snap, hashtag and share! Tag @BrassyApple and @Peacefrom6Pieces if you can too!

Also follow our Bravery and Beauty PINTEREST board for more inspiration!

Anger stage of Grief

2014-01-21T01:28:00.001-07:00

I wasn't sure I'd ever hit the anger stage of grief and so far I've kept it at bay. But as the days go on and I miss my dad more and more I find it creeping in.

All the sudden I want my dad so bad I feel like throwing a full out two year old tantrum. Something like this...

I quickly (10 sec) pull my thoughts into check and tell myself angers not the way and a trantrum won't help. So I just cry and miss him extra hard for a bit.

I worry I might be like a volcano and just explode one of these days. (I'm only human.)

Is this normal? Anyone else felt this way? What helps you?

Pressure Diamonds Paradigm Shift

2014-01-19T12:37:00.001-07:00

I love Rhonna Designs App and the opportunity she gives me to create pictures (above).

I like to create inspirational pics especially on Sunday and as I was looking for something in the app this quote struck a cord with my heart.

As this week I was overloaded with added pressures with acedemic struggling children I found myself sad and overwhelmed. When things are added to my plate without me choosing I tend to crumble for a minute (or an evening) before I pick up my big girl warrior panties and charge on.

When I read this quote it gave me a paradigm shift... that I can accept the added pressures of life as an opportunity to create and conquer the warrior within me. The added pressures can be a gift to change and be better. Yes, even as I type this I cringe and say "I don't want to!" Haha just let those thoughts Go! (🎶 Let it go, Let it go 🎶 -Frozen)

The truth is I DO want to be a warrior. I want my light and strength to shine bright like a diamond. The only way to do that is to let the pressures become an opportunity to conquer.

My 2014 Word

2014-01-01T10:32:00.001-07:00

This word came to me in July. I've been searching for the right definition of this word. I don't see this word in a fighting or war like manor. To me it means strength, virtue, service.

"Warriors are not born and they are not made...Warriors create themselves through trial and error, pain and suffering, and their ability to conquer their own faults." -unknown

I will continue to create and conquer,

I AM A WARRIOR!

Its the word create that jumped out at me and made it perfect. I wrote this quote and thoughts in my phone 3 years ago. As I get older it's interesting to see the pieces of my life come together. I didn't know it then the Warrior God and I was/are creating.

My dad and I had many conversations about creating ourselves. When I told him this creating quote he loved it and we referred back to it in many of our life philosophy discussions. One of his life quotes was, "If it's to be...It's up to me!"

I owe so much of the Warrior I am today because of the guidance, belief and love of my parents. I'm so grateful.

Whatever comes this year I will learn and grow, create and conquer, I will be the Warrior God wants and needs me to be.

I'd love to lift each other up, if you have a pic or a quote that can do that share and use #warrior2014.

It's All Special November Link-Up

2013-11-07T18:00:00.000-07:00

Welcome to It's All Special: The Special Needs Link Up! This is It's All Special: November Edition, hosted by Mishmash Mama, Trust Me, I'm a Mom,and Peace from 6 Pieces through the It's All Special Community on Google+.

This month, our members are talking about "hope."

You are invited to link up your posts about hope and special needs parenting at the bottom of this post. If you missed last month's It's All Special, you can find it here. If you have questions, would like to co-host, or would like to sponsor a special needs appropriate giveaway, email Shannon at mishmashmamablog@gmail.com.

Your hosts are

When you link up, please:

Be on topic (silliness, humor, anger, honesty!) Old posts are fine.

Follow your hosts

Add our badge to your post, or link back here

Comment on at least 2 other posts! Share the love!

Use #ItsAllSpecial on social media

Also, feel free to request membership to It's All Special, our Google+ Community

...and finally, enter this month's giveaway, sponsored generously by Doodler Crayons.

Doodler Crayons™ are reshaped fun crayons

Great for kids big or little! Perfect for art projects, unique gifts, stocking stuffers, or even use them as party favors!

Doodler Crayons is a family run crayon recycle shop that was created in 2009. We are located on a small farm in the beautiful valley of Crow, Oregon. If you are ever in the area stop by and say Hi! We hand-craft each crayon with detail, care and love. We support the environment, green America and local economy.

Link up your post below, then come back and enter the giveaway!
a Rafflecopter giveaway

Don't forget your badge!

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Hope, It's All Special

2013-11-06T22:46:00.001-07:00

Life is funny. As little kids we imagine our lives in the future. We create dreams, goals and ideas that we HOPE will be our reality. We learn from others what we want and don't want. We plan and prepare for all of our dreams to come true. We believe that we are on the right track as things fall into place and we make the right decisions in order to accomplish our goals. And then...

You're hit by a 2x4 (literally or figuratively) and our reality we dreamed of and planned on is no longer available to us in its entirety. It's changed somehow. Maybe you planned to be be married with 5 kids, two dogs and live on a farm, but you find out after your first baby you can't have any more. Maybe you planned to go to NYC and enjoy single life in the city, but instead while in NY you meet the love of your life and follow his dreams. Maybe life is just the way you planned when you get hit by a car while on your bike and your hopes turn into a fight for your life.

In my life I feel like I've gone through a few of these reality altering experiences. Some of them I've welcomed and some of them I've handled like a two year old throwing a tantrum. Believe me when I say it's a lot easier to accept than resist because no matter what it is what it is. In my experience the life that is waiting for us to accept is better than what we hoped for.

The Rock's diagnosis with autism has been one of these experiences and all my hopes and dreams for my sweet baby boy changed. My hopes and dreams for my son became simplified. My hopes for him became what most every other child takes for granted. My hope for my son is that one day I'll be able to have a conversation, a simple answer to a simple question like:

Me "How was your day?"

Him "It was good."

Me "I love you, buddy."

Him "I love you too, Mom."

This will be the most amazing conversation I will ever have in my life.

My HOPE's for the Rock have become a belief, which I think are even stronger than hope. I BELIEVE that my son will one day talk with me, understand more than he does now and will be successful in the life he is meant to have. I don't know how this will all happen but because of my HOPE and BELIEF in him I continue to fight for him, work for him and accept the miracles that occur daily, you never know when it will all become our reality.

What do you hope for? How do you keep your hopes alive?

A New Normal without My Dad

2013-10-31T00:05:00.000-06:00

I haven't written much about my dad's passing, it's just so hard to sit at the computer and try to write with tears streaming down my face. There's so many things I want to say and share. I know too many people whose parents have passed on this year and as we all embark on tomorrow, Halloween, the beginning of the end of 2013 and all the festivities that will happen in the next two months, I hope that by sharing a little of my thoughts will help us all.

When dad died I cried everyday for 3 months straight, since then it's only about every other day but sometimes more. I haven't erased his texts (the last one I ever got says "Love you", I've saved his voice messages (oh, how I miss his voice) and I treasure more than ever the tokens of love he's given me. The everyday stuff kind of goes back to normal and it's as if my dad's traveling like usual, but then Sunday comes and he's not at dinner, there's no phone call on my birthday and tomorrow he won't be here to enjoy my soup or wassail, that both my parents taught me to make. Right now at midnight I just realized I don't even have groceries for tomorrow. My coping mechanism has been to accept what's coming and only do as much as I can. I let whatever is coming happen and then decide what I can do in the moment. As I'm writing I'm realizing this is what I do. So I guess we'll see how tomorrow goes and if we'll have soup and wassail. It's not that I'm putting it off, I'm just allowing myself to relax a bit and only run as fast as my feet and broken heart will let me.

I have been blessed with many tender mercies, feelings, thoughts and inspiration that I know came from my dad and a loving Heavenly Father over the last five months. I am so grateful for these experiences, they have carried me through. However with every new day I create a new normal without him being just a phone call away.

Tomorrow, Halloween, begins a new holiday normal and I believe this will be the most difficult holiday season I've ever had. My mom goes all out for holidays and dad is always right there with her, I can't imagine how hard this will be for her. They both make the holidays special in their own way from the food to the gifts it is magical. I've never made Thanksgiving dinner without my dad either in person or over the phone. I think sometimes my brain would purposely forget just so I could call my dad and have him by my side. December we get together at least twice a week for something, it's wonderful.........And now we'll do all those things with a big empty seat at Thanksgiving dinner, without our song leader on Sinter Klaas and without a poem from Dad Christmas morning (these are little tokens of him).

I know the firsts will be the hardest, but I don't know if it ever gets easy to let go of the pain, it's as if I'd be letting go of him. I don't want to ever let go! I want to always remember and miss him like crazy.

I love the fact that everyday something reminds me of my dad, as if it's him saying hello. It can be anything from an image to a song. Today it was Katy Perry's new song Unconditionally. One of the last conversations I had with my dad, I told him I was worried he'd be disappointed in me. He then told me with all the love a dad can have that there was Never Anything I could do to make him disappointed and that he loves me unconditionally. I love you, daddy.

Party, YES! Halloween Costumes, NO!!!!!

2013-10-28T00:03:00.000-06:00

Am I the worst mom IF I just dread coming up with Halloween costumes? Well I may be, but it's just not something I enjoy. I can throw a fun party any day (if I'm in the mood, Haha), but costumes are just plain no fun work for me. Sure, I think that all the costumes are cute and when I see Family Costumes I sometimes kick myself but then square my shoulders and accept that's just not me. I have done one or two family costumes throughout the last 13 years but not many and that's OK.
To all you talented costume making moms, I sincerely applaud you and admire your work.

This is the first year my girls 13 & 11 haven't had their difficult costumes planned since April. You know, when they talk about it for months and I still don't plan before Halloween how I'm going to make that work. Yay! They are growing up and out of costumes and I can let the guilt go.

Luckily my boys don't demand much from me. My 5 year old doesn't even like to be dressed at all. No, I don't let him go naked but I'm not about to fight to put on a costume neither of us care about. My 7 year old wants to be Fantasmic Mickey. That seemed easy enough, one trip to the Disney store and I'm done, right? Nope, they don't carry that costume. I am so lucky to have the most easy going boy and he's happy with what we've got left over from previous costumes to make it work.

I'm so glad time goes on and that all things come to PASS and not to stay. Even halloween costume designing motherhood time. Here's proof that I've done fun costumes and am good with moving on.

Board Games as Classroom Parties

2013-10-23T23:39:00.000-06:00

Yep! You guessed it, I'm a Room Mom for my sixth grader. At our school the kids are privileged to have classroom parties for a couple of holidays through out the year. With Halloween next week I thought I'd share with you how I took CLUE the board game and spun it into a full on party.

My daughter begged me NOT to have stations, but with 30 kids it's almost impossible to have a party in a classroom and not break into groups. I think what my daughter was really asking me to do was to have a cohesive party with a beginning, middle and end. What better way to do this than with a game.

I started with the lights off and window blinds closed so there was just a little light to set the mood. I was dressed up with a red ribbon around my neck and acted a little while another mom read a scary kids story "The Red Ribbon". When the story was over I explained with a "Dundunduuun" that we were going to find out who, where and how this happened to the woman with the red ribbon by playing a real live version of the game CLUE.

I split the kids into equal groups and had them each start at different stations. These stations were facilitated by other moms, who were all dressed up as characters from the game with some kind of resemblance to the room they were in (examples below).
Each group was given an actual board game CLUE sheet to record their findings.
At each station the kids had to do different activities, when the activity was completed the team was shown actual clue cards. These cards I divided up just like you do when playing the board game.
The kids rotated stations for the time we had allotted, at this point they all came to where I had displayed the game board in the classroom and placed the figures with who, where and how they thought the mystery played out.
I read the group suspicions and then pulled out the "Top Secret" cards and revealed the answer. This was also the CLUE as to where the classroom prize was hidden. The answer being Mr. Green in the Bathroom with the Rope. In the classroom bathroom I hid a plastic green jack-o-lantern full of glow it the dark necklaces.

Once the prizes were found the kids got to enjoy popcorn, soda and freshly made in the classroom cotton candy. The kids said it was the best party. Thanks to all the moms who made it all possible.

Here is how we divided up the characters, rooms and the activities we played...
Character Room Activity

Professor Plum Billiards Dart Board (every kid got a turn until they reach the set amount of points)
Mrs. Scarlet Lounge Halloween Word Scramble

Mrs. Peacock Dining Room Blindfolded Safety Pin Dig (in individual rice buckets)

Mr. Green GreenHouse Spider Throw (similar to darts but with sticky spiders and a web from Target)

Cl. Mustard Kitchen Fear Factor Blindfolded (everyday foods named something spooky)

Mrs. White Library Charades (every child took a turn acting to receive their clues)

Top 5 Common Response to Autism

2013-10-03T16:35:00.001-06:00

First of all I'm so excited to be a host for the very first #It'sAllSpecial monthly round up. I hope that you will share your posts with us and together we can uplift and inspire one another.

The older The Rock gets the more often I find it necessary to tell people he has autism. At the park the kids notice he doesn't talk and ask me why. Other kids ask him questions and he ignores them they ask why. Adults ask him how old he is and he won't look at them. When he was younger he could get away with this behavior and people would wave it off. Now it's not that simple. Sometimes I need to tell people he has autism for his safety. Most of the time I tell someone the Rock has autism I brace myself for impact because the "conversation plane" is about to crash.

Here are my top 5 common responses when I tell someone "My so has autism" AND what I wish I could say (only sometimes, sarcasm helps) and how I actually politely reply.

#5 "I'm sorry" with a frown

WISH~ "I'm NOT he's the most amazing blessing in my life. I'm sorry YOU weren't special enough for him to be yours."

ACTUAL~ "He's an amazing boy!"

#4 "oh, awesome. Not that it's awesome he's autistic."

WISH~ "Yeah, let me tell you what IS awesome! Watching you squirm." Jk that's mean and I'm too nice but sometimes I wish I could say that. Most of the time people just don't know what to say. I've done this myself. Ugh!

ACTUAL~ "You're right he is awesome!"

#3 "How did you know?"

WISH~ "He told me, duh?" or "I took a quiz online and diagnosis him myself."

ACTUAL~ "Two near death experiences and a lot of other signs" sometimes I share THE story if they ask more.

#2 "He doesn't look autistic."

WISH~ "You just can't see the mark right now. Ill show you later." Autism doesn't have "a look" and the spectrum is wide. When you say this it comes across as an accusation that the parent, doctors and specialists are wrong and you know more than anyone.

ACTUAL~ "He's beautiful and/or perfect!"

#1Common Response and the one I hate the most. Not the person just the question. "How autistic is he?" or "We'll he's high function right?" What if he's not high functioning and you just stuck your foot in your mouth again AND you rubbed salt into an open emotional wound.

WISH~ "You tell me, he doesn't speak independently, we've never had a conversation, he whines or screams at me for the last to help him and its a guessing game all day (that I rock at, NOW), he's constantly in danger if I let him get out of my sight for more than 5 min., he doesn't play with friends, he obsesses over movie trailers, he gags at most foods." On and on I could go.

ACTUAL~"mildly severe still learning to talk although he rocks at swimming, climbing and jumping." It's ok to focus on the positive. Our kiddos need to hear us talk about their talents and praise them. It feeds their spirits when we do.

Here's some suggested responses, that I'm grateful to hear on very very rare occasions, therefore not on the "common" response list.

"He looks like a great kid!"

"He's a cute kid."
"You're a lucky mom, he's special."
Give any other kind of compliment. We are all fighting a tough battle and we can use all the encourage we can give one another. Inspire one another by focusing on the positive. This quote is a good one.

It's All Special

2013-10-03T16:35:00.000-06:00

Welcome to the first edition of It's All Special: The Special Needs Link Up!

This is It's All Special: October Edition, hosted by Mishmash Mama, Trust Me, I'm a Mom, and Peace from 6 Pieces through the It's All Special Community on Google+.

This month, our members are talking about the responses they get when they tell people "My child has special needs."

When you link up, please:

Be on topic (silliness, humor, anger, honesty!)

Follow the hosts

Shannon @ Mishmash Mama

Facebook

Twitter

Google+

Cobilynn @ Peace from 6 Pieces

Google+

Facebook

Instagram

Michelle @ Trust Me, I'm A Mom

Twitter

Facebook

Instagram

Add our badge to your post, or link back here

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Comment on at least 2 other posts! Share the love!

Use #ItsAllSpecial on social media

Also, feel free to request membership to It's All Special, our Google+ Community

you know you're a M.O.M. when...

2013-10-01T07:00:00.000-06:00

...preparing for the worst takes all your worries away.
I was talking to a dear friend (Aleisha from She Calls Me "Mama Leisha") the other day and she was explaining to me how worried she was about "birthing a person" for the third time (she's a pro, right?). I told her she had it under control and not to worry. We all know that doesn't help. So I told her what I do when I'm worried.

When I'm worried it's usually because I've imagined the most terrible thing happening, one of my loved ones dead or extremely injured. This worry doesn't come out of no where, I have very spirited children who put themselves in dangerous situations all the time, just because they are not paying attention or they do not understand what danger is. Recently The Rock (5yr old with autism) realized he's able to reach the branch on the only tree in the backyard. This realization now makes it possible for him to be over the fence in 1min flat. The first time he did this I had my eyes off him for 5 minutes and he was found laying in the middle of the street (the one that people drive WAY too fast down the hill). Now we're back to house arrest. Haha

I understand worry but it turns into anxiety and that leads to a whole spectrum of debilitating scenarios, I don't enjoy. I've come up with my way to cope with this. I determine if I can change my situation, if I can I do. Obviously sometimes you can't, like my sweet pregnant friend, something you just have to go through have faith and LET IT PASS. In times of not being able to change the situation I imagine every possible scenario imaginable, I come up with a solution or decide what I would do if it happened and then???? I have to LET IT PASS. I've then prepared my mind as best I can for the worst and I have to have faith, turn it over to the angels watching and let whatever is suppose to happen occur.

I totally agree with the idea to stay positive, look on the bright side, pray for the best outcome. But "if ye are prepared, ye shall not fear." This is how I make this scripture real for me and the ability to feel PEACE in these worrisome times. What do you do?

Catching Fire Premiere

2013-09-30T10:20:00.002-06:00

I get asked often (like we all do, right?) "What are you working on?" "What's your next project?"

I'm thrilled that I can finally tell you and give you some details.

I know the title gave it away, Yep, I'm working on our next movie Premiere for Charity.

Catching Fire is just 52 days away from opening night and the

SagaGirls Premiere Party for Charity

November 22, 2013

@ The District

(in South Jordan, UT)

It's going to be a great time with

Costume Contest

Target Practice (bow&arrows, of course)

Treats

Movie

and our own

REAPING

where we find out if

THE ODDS ARE IN YOUR FAVOR!

We are thrilled to have Doug Smith Auto as our Theater Host this year making it possible to give all the proceeds from this event to the Autism Council of Utah our charity of choice.

you know you're a M.O.M. when...

2013-09-12T07:00:00.000-06:00

you jump for joy when it gets dark by 8pm, so the fight from the children to go to bed will be over
(well at least the argument that it's not bedtime because it's light outside).

I believe this to be true for many a mom. We love our kids, but somedays we love them even more when they are sweetly sleeping. Like days like today where one after another they were upset at me for something and arguing with me about my parenting until I'd had enough and they are all in bed before 8 for everyone's sanity.

Seriously, I am looking for reasons to be happy it's getting dark early. I LOVE the sun and am sad when it goes away early. So here's to looking on the bright side of life. There's always a bright side.

NBC Fall Comedy, The Michael J. Fox Show

2013-09-11T07:00:00.000-06:00

Last week KSL was sweet and invited me to a Red Carpet screening of some of the new NBC fall comedies. My vote by far was the Michael J. Fox show. I was already excited to see Michael on TV again and the fact that it relates to his personal life off the air was pretty much a done deal for me before it even started.

For me these 30 minutes each week will be a reminder to laugh, even when things are NOT the way you planned them to be. To laugh often when someone in your family is fighting a debilitating disease. To enjoy the good, fight the bad and accept the ugly. The show scenario hits all too close to home for me, but I still enjoyed it.

Sure I cried when Michael was trying his hardest to open a jar of pickles and couldn't so his daughter stepped in and took over, that is what me, my sisters and mom would do for my dad.

Of course Michael will remind me of my dad every week. That's ok I want to remember my dad, his strength to overcome, persevere and his FIGHT for one more minute with all those he loves.

The preview had me at "Hello" and I hope it continues to keep me wanting more each week.
Thank you KSL for the opportunity to see the preview and share my thoughts.

Here is a sneak peak:

Golfing for Autism

2013-09-10T07:00:00.000-06:00

The American United Credit Union hosted a wonderful event benefiting the Autism Council of Utah.

I had the honor of volunteering at this event, by buzzing around in a fun golf cart all day passing out drinks to all of the players. It was a beautiful hot sunny day, a tough job, but someone had to do it.
Here's proof that we "worked" hard or maybe just made fun pictures!

I am so glad that I have the opportunity to "play" with these incredible women. Three major events this year, why? Why do I do these events? Besides the fact that I believe it is part of my purpose here on earth, I've been given talents to make them happen and it brings me PEACE. Other than that I do it because I believe it makes a difference. Living in a state that doesn't provide insurance for many families with special needs including autism, we need all the help we can get. The funds we raise for the Autism Council of Utah goes to Grants for organizations/families here in the state of Utah.
The ACU is ran completely by volunteers. No One gets paid, it just goes back to where it's needed most. I believe that's a cause worth "playing/working" for.

If you're around I hope you come to our next event in November.
(hint hint: You might Catch on Fire)

Summer by Instagram instead of Dates

2013-09-09T22:44:00.001-06:00

I love that the longest summer we've ever had, since kids were in school, can be measured by our Instagram pics instead of by the date. This summer was one of my most difficult as not a day has gone by that my heart didn't ache because of the loss of my father. I have tried very hard to laugh as much or more than I've cried.

JOY we did obtain often!

Here is a look at all the joy we had in 10 weeks.

you know you're a M.O.M. when......

2013-09-04T07:00:00.000-06:00

....time for YOU is at the bottom of the To Do list.

I know, I know some of you may be saying you do things for your self a lot and yes I do take some time to put my feet up and soak up the sun.

The thing is if you don't take time to do the everyday simple things like eating, showering, working out and putting on makeup, then the get aways, mommy time-outs may not be as much fun or as

rejuvenating . As it turns out I am actually a lot happier and way more productive if I do these simple things. If I do these simple things I will also be healthier and stronger and that is what makes me better.

I can say yes to a child, husband, friend and possibly even foe before I say YES TO ME.

I know I've learned this lesson before and I don't think that long ago, but here I am hoping that it's not just me and I can encourage YOU to say yes to you too.

This post is not intended to endorse selfishness! It's just a reminder to put the oxygen mask on me first so that I have all that I need to take care of those the Lord needs me to serve.

PEACE from 6 Pieces

my suicide letter that led the cops to my front door

My March for Women's Rights

My 2017 One Word

GLAD 2015

2014 Warrior Reflection

Hexagon Wall Art

A Far Reach

I am Brave and Beautiful

Anger stage of Grief

Pressure Diamonds Paradigm Shift

My 2014 Word

It's All Special November Link-Up

This month, our members are talking about "hope."

Your hosts are

Shannon @ Mishmash Mama

Cobilynn @ Peace from 6 Pieces

Michelle @ Trust Me, I'm A Mom

When you link up, please:

Doodler Crayons™ are reshaped fun crayons

Link up your post below, then come back and enter the giveaway! a Rafflecopter giveaway

Don't forget your badge!

Hope, It's All Special

A New Normal without My Dad

Party, YES! Halloween Costumes, NO!!!!!

Board Games as Classroom Parties

Top 5 Common Response to Autism

It's All Special

Welcome to the first edition of It's All Special: The Special Needs Link Up!

When you link up, please:

Shannon @ Mishmash Mama

Cobilynn @ Peace from 6 Pieces

Michelle @ Trust Me, I'm A Mom

you know you're a M.O.M. when...

Catching Fire Premiere

you know you're a M.O.M. when...

NBC Fall Comedy, The Michael J. Fox Show

Golfing for Autism

Summer by Instagram instead of Dates

you know you're a M.O.M. when......

Link up your post below, then come back and enter the giveaway!
a Rafflecopter giveaway