Peanut Butter in my Hair- Stories of Life, Love and Loss

The Beginnings of a Dream

2012-02-28T20:22:00.000-06:00

"A dream is a wish your heart makes, when you're fast asleep"

I'm a shape shifter, a jack of all trades a master of none. That's what I've always thought.

Dip a toe in here, a toe in there. try it all because life is fun and short! While it's fun it has always left me feeling a little stretched and empty, like I could never master something or perfect anything because I too quickly would move on to something else. As a recovering perfectionist this feeds into an inner dialogue of self depreciation and criticism.

Why try?

Give it a week and you will want something new.

I'm learning to embrace a new identiy and accept that I am an atitst. I may not create huge sculptures like my sister or paint masterpieces but I am embracing the idea that I create beautiful things.

Sometimes that's through words. Or Photos. Or crafts. Or the eyes of my children.

This past weekend I dusted off an old dream.

Being on stage.

I hoped in the van with no kids. None at all. Not even the baby.

And the butterflies rubbled and threaten to burst, right of my belly, right out of my chest.

Words. Ready. Waiting to be set free.

Butterflies calmed with some bad music played loud. Very Loud.

Nerves calmed at the site of my city (and rockstar parking!)

The city that will always feel like home in my heart.

So perfect as this was uncommon ground for my feet to tread (though it felt so right, so normal)

In the bathroom.

A reminder needed. Beauty is not always seen What you have can't be summed up in your words on a page or spoken aloud. You are more than the sum of your parts.

And we take time for tea and we wait.

Wait to see where dreams land and words arrive.

But the gift, the dream revealed is not in getting the part, but in stepping out of the shell and going for it in the first place.

Listen to Your Mother has a few more auditions still happening if your interested (you should totally do it)

Madison March 3
Philadelphia (deadline March 9)
Northwest Indiana March 11

Blue

2012-02-27T13:38:00.001-06:00

He is the ocean, deep and grounded with depths so dark even he doesn't know what they hold

She is the sky free and light, going on into infinity.

She swirls and dances around him, whipping up his waves, dancing a tango that swells and recedes as her mood dictates.

No matter her mood, no matter his darkness they will always meet at the horizon.

A blending together to seemingly different entities at one spot, stretching out to infinity.

Combining and blending until no one knows where one ends and the other begins.

Inspired by Bigger Picture Blogs Monday Creative Prompt, do you have five minutes? Where does the image take you?

An Epically Ordinary Love Story {Part V}

2012-02-24T10:08:00.001-06:00

div style="text-align: center;"> Welcome to Bigger Picture Moments! Taking time to revel in the simple moments that make up the bigger picture of our life! The link up can be found at Part I.

As we wrap up our focus on love this month I thought it appropriate to finally share the story of the love of my life. It’s perfectly crazy hollywood style romantic comedy material, if I wanted to exgerate the fnny details. I won’t. It’s just an ordinary story of love, timing, and the amazing way God ensures we meet the people we need at the time (or times) we need them.

Taken That Night

Part V: The Boy on One Knee

After that New Years night our path never walked separately again.

It wasn’t a whirlwind and it wasn’t always perfect it was just epically ordinary love.

Fast forward (ever so slowly) to New Years Eve 2000. After ringing in 2000 in a completly boring way we bought tickets to see BB King at Chicago’s Union Station. It was sponsored by a local radio station, we were going to get dressed up, have drinks, listen to awesome music and it was going to be great!

Except it almost didn’t happen.

I was sick.

So sick.

I had a terrible bronchitis and was literally coughing up a lung every few minutes. It was terrible. The boy repeatedly tried to get me to cancel and sell the tickets. Me being as stubborn as ever completely refused. So we got dolled up and headed downtown.

I remember being hot with fever, pounding head, burning chest and going through spells of dizziness due to coughing. Romantic huh?

It was almost midnight and we were in the crowd in front of the stage waiting for the countdown. I was looking around for the champagne, we were supposed to get a glass and everyone knows you can’t toast the new year without a glass. The boy was trying to be all romantic, talking about how special I was, how I have really changed his life and he is so happy that he went to that New Years Party.

I think I looked at him confused, like really dude? We’re going to get deep now, minutes before the countdown? I think I even yeah, yeah, yeahed him. I don’t know I wasn’t even really paying attention. Then I almost died.

Okay, that may be a bit dramatic. I start coughing, bad. The boy pulled me out of the crowd and sat me down at a bench at the far end of the station while I coughed up a lung and tried to regain composure. He wanted to take me to the emergency room and I was adament that I didn’t need it, I just needed water and time.

We sat on that bench and he held me as my lungs ratted and sputtered. Once I started to feel better he stood up and started talking fast...I don’t remember a word he said because I saw him pull out a box and get down on his knee and I just kind of went all jello like. Butterflies filled my body and I just lost it in a pile of tears and kisses.

Obviously I said Yes.

Turns out I was right, I ad meet my husband and we had passed each other by. The time wasn’t right and God knew it. He put him in my path when I was vunerable and needed someone to take care of me and he brought him back in my path when we were both ready to grow up and put someone else first.

So it wasn’t love at first site.

Or second.

Or third.

But love at Fourth site jsut doesn’t have the same ring to it does it?

11 Years, 3 kids later on our 10th Anniversary

An Epically Ordinary Love Story {Part IV}

2012-02-23T20:49:00.001-06:00

Welcome to Bigger Picture Moments! Taking time to revel in the simple moments that make up the bigger picture of our life! The link up can be found at Part I.

As we wrap up our focus on love this month I thought it appropriate to finally share the story of the love of my life. It’s perfectly crazy Hollywood style romantic comedy material, if I wanted to exaggerate the funny details. I won’t. It’s just an ordinary story of love, timing, and the amazing way God ensures we meet the people we need at the time (or times) we need them.

Part IV: So we meet again

It was 1997 and my roommates and I were all sitting around in one of our dorm rooms. It was the night before Christmas break and we were just chilling, chatting, and probably playing games. I had broken up with my boyfriend over Thanksgiving break and had fallen into a bad habit of hanging out with a (bad for me) ex-boyfriend when I was at home. I was not particularly looking forward to going home for break. I was also apparently in a reflective mood.

I don’t remember most of the conversation from the night, only that we had somehow gotten to talking about marriage and futures. Which makes sense when you have only a year and half of college left. What I said in the conversation though has stuck with me to this day and it still kind of gives me chills. I turned to my girlfriends and said;

“I don’t know I just feel like I have already meet my husband and we missed each other, we didn't meet or click or whatever. I just feel like he has already passed through my life”

I went home to just a normal break full of working, friends, and working some more. New years Eve was approaching and I had plans to do what we did every New Years Eve, head over to Alice’s.

Leonard was still trying to get Alice’s attention so he dragged Goatee boy with him to the party. I was totally excited when I saw them walk in, but I was trying to play it cool. I don’t remember a whole lot of specific details from the evening I remember being so glad that I smoked (at the time) so I could go outside and hang out with him. I remember fighting over the remote because he wanted to watch The Simpson's. I remember sitting so close to him on the couch and feeling the butterflies building up in my chest, the anticipation of that first kiss, trying to sneak it in when no one was looking.

Leonard ended up leaving on his own, and the boy stayed with me all night.

As I walked home I was on cloud nine. It was the best New Years ever.

We meet that night at Panera. We went on a date to the Art Institute. We hung out all weekend. I was totally smitten. But it was only four days and then I was back off to school. I left thinking that this was a great fun weekend but long distance was hard and no one ever makes the three hour trek out to my school.

He emailed me.

He called me. We talked for hours.

One week later he came up to visit me at school. With flowers.

I knew right then that this was going to be something different.

To be continued....

In case you missed them:
Part I: The Girl in the Back Seat
Part II: The Boy on the Porch
Part III: The Boy that Was Mistaken

and coming tomorrow, the epically ordinary ending! (It's here, Part V)

*Names changed to protect the innocent bystanders

An Epically Ordinary Love Story {Part III}

2012-02-23T11:42:00.000-06:00

Welcome to Bigger Picture Moments! Taking time to revel in the simple moments that make up the bigger picture of our life! The link up can be found at Part I.

Part III: The Boy who was Mistaken

Several week later and everyone was making plans for the Fourth of July. As is most suburban areas there are plenty of events to choose from over several nights. One of those evenings I decided to meet Alice and her cousin Zoe at a fair and fireworks display in a nearby town. A male friend of mine Sam invited me to go with him and his mom.

Now Sam and I were close friends and his mom was a doll who all of Sam’s friends frequently talked to and hung out with. This invite was not in anyway unusual. So we’re hanging out on the blanket waiting for the fireworks to start when Leonard and The Boy with the goatee walk up to us.

My heart flipped flopped in my chest and I tried to look cool and calm. We exchanged pleasantries but the boy was as aloof as ever and Leonard was just looking for Alice. They went on their way shortly after that.

------
(not very dramatic reenactment)

Leonard, shoving Goatee Boy in the arm. “Dude! What was that!”
“What” he says kicking the ground and shrugging his shoulders as he takes a drag off his cigarette. He knew exactly what he was talking about but he was trying to play cool.
“Dude, you know what, that’s the girl from the party. The one that’s interested in you, the one that is LEGAL unlike the one you were sucking face with”
“I keep telling you! SHE WAS LEGAL! Jeesh, anyway that grl is clearly on a date. Why else would she be here with a dude and his mom?”

---------

Sigh. I lean back on my arms and think to myself what does a girl have to do to get this boys attention!

Alice came bounding over with Zoe following behind her. “Did you see him? Did you see him? Goatee boy is here! Did you talk to him”

“Yeah but he didn’t have much to say and they left really quick.”

That was the last time I saw him that summer, but it would not be the last time that year....

To Be continued...

In case you missed the beginning:
Part I: The Girl in the Backseat
Part II: The Boy on the Porch

*Names changed to protect the innocent bystanders

An Epically Ordinary Love Story {Part II}

2012-02-23T07:55:00.003-06:00

Welcome to Bigger Picture Moments! Taking time to revel in the simple moments that make up the bigger picture of our life! The link up can be found at Part I.

Photo Credit Victoria Allen

Part II: The Boy on the Front Porch

Two years later, it was the summer between my sophomore and junior year of college. I hadn’t thought about the boy that drove me home even once. I was going about life working, playing and counting down the days until I could get back to college and out of my cramped house.I had just broken up with my boyfriend from college and was really not in the mood to deal with (rich) boys anymore.

My best friend Alice* was having her own predicament. A former boyfriend, Leonard* was doing his best to woo her back. She was not interested, but she was also way to nice to just say no and walk away. Leonard and her had been friends for a really long time so I don’t blame her. On this particular summer night Leonard was trying to get her to come to a party at the Boy in the Blue VW’s house, I agreed to go with her.

I went with a bit of a chip on my shoulder. I had just broken up with another (rich) preppy, do what I want, when I want it, get what I want, when I want it, boy and I assumed everyone who was at this party was the same based on the zip code. We arrived to a driveway full of boy racers and motorcycles so I decided to have some fun and leave early.

I made my way to the backyard in full, exuberant, let’s have fun mode, even though I had little interest in being there. When I first arrived I noticed that there was one guy who looked a little more grunge (cool) than the rest with a goatee, a cigarette and an aura of cool. I gave him I sideways look, I was definitely interested but I was not about to go out of my way.

At one point I wandered into the kitchen to help put some things together. There we’re two guys inside, a total modern day Laurel and Hardy. One tall, skinny, blonde the other short, stocky, dark Italian. They were both more then a bit inebriated and both were obviously trying to (unsuccessfully) seem like super cool guys. I started preparing some “drunk watermelon” and managed to convince both of them that I was a TV chef on our local PBS station. I laughed my way back outside to find the boy with the goatee.

Backyard parties were not Alice’s scene and she was itching to get to the clubs and dance, I was itching to try to talk to the boy with the goatee but I couldn’t find him anywhere so we decided to leave. We said good by to Leonard and asked where they boy was, since it was his house we wanted to say good bye and thank you for having us because we are nothing if not polite and proper.

Turns out he was on the front porch, with another girl. The history of this story is that she young. The boy insists she was older than Leonard and I continue to this day to tease him about Either way he was busy sucking face and all we got was an embarrassed wave when we left.

The next day Alice called me, Leonard had called her because one of the boys from the party wanted a date with me. “Oh is it the boy with the goatee?” I ask a little too excitedly, my own excitement in my voice surprised me embarrassed me. No, she says it’s his brother.

Now here is the Hollywood funny twist. I am terrible (TERRIBLE) at remembering peoples names and faces. I need to meet someone multiple times and make up things in my head to remember them, so after a short meeting at a party it’s unlikely I will remember anyone I meet. So the reality is that goatee boy’s brother was the tall (Laurel) guy in the Laurel and Hardy pair in the kitchen. In my mind he was the short (Hardy) of the pair.

So despite Alice’s insistence that he was a super nice guy I declined, I was not interested in a short Italian, Tall and skinny was more my style.

I went about the next few weeks of summer just doing my thing, wondering about that inreresting aloof boy with the goatee.

Little did I know we would meet again in a few weeks.

To be continued....

Part I: The Girl in the Backseat

*Names changed to protect the innoncent bystanders

An Epically Ordinary Love Story {Part 1}

2012-02-22T20:59:00.000-06:00

Welcome to Bigger Picture Moments! Taking time to revel in the simple moments that make up the bigger picture of our life!

Photo Credit Victoria Allen

Part 1- The girl in the back seat

I was 18 years old. It was the summer between high school graduation and leaving for college. Those akward 3 months where you are on the cusp of freedom and adulthood and change yet you sit in a holding pattern, still a child at home waiting for the great adventure to begin. I had landed a sweet job as a day camp counselor and had suddenly found myself with a group of new older friends from the other (rich) high school.

Their world was new, exciting and interesting to me, an outisder. It consisted of big empty houses, hot tubs, full bars and no parents, if you get my drift. We were celebrating at one of our weekly “we survived anoter week” parties and I behaved like most 18 year olds who had a small self esteem issues would; I jumped in with both feet eager to fit in and seem cool, one of them.

This particular night the festivities had grown beyond our group of counseolrs to friends and firends of friends. I, had too much fun earlier in the evening and was ready to go long before the friend who broght me wanted to leave so I crashed out on a couch in the unused living room. Apparently there was a bit of a freak out thinking that I was passed out and was going to be ill (I wasn't). My friend who was hosting the party asked her friends boyfriend to drive me home.

That boyfriend got in a fight with his girlfriend that night as I sat in the back seat of his blue VW fox. At the time I couldn’t have told you his name or what he looked like. I got of the car at my house, thanked him and went home, not even concerned with what his name was.

That boyfriend of a friend’s friend, would become my husband in 6 short (but long) years.

Not that we had any idea as I fell into bed and he apparently got chewed out all the way home. Our path was set for us, that day and it would cross several more times before we realized t was meant to be walked together.

To be continued....

Part II: The Boy that was Mistaken

Live.

Simple,historic love, that’s my Simple Moment, Bigger Picture this week. What’s yours?

Capture.

Link up yours at HERE! this week.

Share.

Please be sure to link to your post, not your blog. Your post must link back here or have our button (found on the sidebar).

Encourage.

Try to visit the other participants and encourage each other in this journey we call life.

I am...

2012-02-22T06:30:00.000-06:00

I am a mom, a wife, a writer, dreamer, a believer, ME.I wonder everyday if I’m doing this life right. I wonder what tomorrow brings and who my children will grow to be. I wonder about them and I wonder about me.I hear the silent rhythm of a house asleep. A stolen moment all for me. I wrap it around myself and hug it tight because it won’t last. It never lasts.

We have begun the third part in our Writing Me series over at Bigger Picture Blogs and I am up first. I would love it if you stopped by to read the rest.

I am....

Juggler {Just Write}

2012-02-21T06:51:00.000-06:00

Source: flickr.com via Melissa on Pinterest

I am a performer.
A juggler.
Grab this, throw it in the air so I can grab that.

Keep tossing, and grabbing and catching and throwing.
Walking the tightrope of life and trying to keep all the balls in the air.

Mother.
Wife.
Self.

I grab and toss.
Grab and toss.

Giving each thing just enough time so that it doesn’t crash to the floor and roll away.
But not giving it enough time so that it can grow flourish.

I’m just a performer juggling all the things.
A jack of all trades a master of none.

So I let one drop, let it fall to the ground.
It rolls away and I try not to look, try not to see what I dropped.
Focus on the balls still in the air.

Grab and toss.
Grab and toss.

Keep the show running and everyone entertained.

A Sweet Peek

2012-02-20T06:32:00.000-06:00

Oh we had a whirlwind weekend!

First we went to Indiana and had photos taken with the oh so talented Beth Fletcher Photography. You can see some sneak peeks from the shoot if you like her Facebook Page.

Saturday morning started with this:

Then I ran down to the oh so yummy and Cafe Ba*Ba*Reeba for the first Chicago Girls Lunch Out. Which was a great time!

The rest of my weekend looked like this:

And that's not even half of it.

I'll be spending the day eating my way out of a sugar coma.

One Year

2012-02-17T06:00:00.000-06:00

Wow.

One Year.

I still frequently jolt up and wonder if it's all a dream.

She has brought us so much grace, healing, love. She has completed our family in ways we didn't know we were incomplete.

I can't believe she's one already.

We're all still smitten, and we will be spending the weekend enjoying and celebrating her.

Psst, if you want to virtually celebrate with us, follow Random Bits of Peanut Butter. I'll be posting lots of pictures there!

History of Love {Simple Moments, Bigger Picture}

2012-02-16T07:35:00.001-06:00

There is something to be said for the lessons of history and lineage.

There have brought us to today, made us who we are.

These images at one time lined the table at my wedding. Greeting guests and reminding everyone of those that walked that aisle before us. Now they line the stairs in our home. Watching over us and showing our children the love that extends back through the generations.

Their stories are varied, the lives and loves different. Love doesn’t have just one face, one right way to be. It’s small and quite, simple and plain, rich an opulent, grand and large. It’s all these things and more.

Love is,

Foreigners in a foreign land.

Neighbors and classmates.

A blind date.

Love is tales of gypsies and carnivals, traveling the back dusty roads in old cars, of church weddings and making your own wedding cake.

The stories are different, the images changes but the love was the same.

These are not the epic tomes of love and romance that sell novels. There may not be grand sweeping gestures and movie like endings. But the lessons that are taught in the smiling faces lining the walls are much more important then flowery stories.

We love.

We have been loved.

We are loved.

Love built this family.

Live.

Simple,historic love, that’s my Simple Moment, Bigger Picture this week. What’s yours?

Capture.

Link up yours at Tasting Grace this week.

Share.

Please be sure to link to your post, not your blog. Your post must link back here or have our button (found on the sidebar).

Encourage.

Try to visit the other participants and encourage each other in this journey we call life.

Wednesday Words of Wisdom

2012-02-15T12:38:00.002-06:00

Spaghetti Tightrope {Just Write}

2012-02-14T11:24:00.000-06:00

As a mother of a child lost I walk a wobbling tightrope of emotions everyday.

Not the taunt, tight steel ropes held a loft in a circus tent to display great feats of courage. No. My tight rope is like a wet wobbly noodle or the rope that a cartoon charter would walk.

It wobbles and bounces. One minute it’s straight and hard and I feel like I have it together and the next it’s wiggling and bouncing and slipping all over.

Parenting is hard. I’ve seen a saying that goes “I love my children with all my heart I just don’t always like them”.

Sometimes our kids are mean and rude and they scream and they yell and they fight sleep and they bite you and you just want to (and sometimes do) scream back. We all have off days.

When my baby acts up though. When she is pushing me to the edge so hard I can see the black bottom coming faster and faster, I am slammed in to a rock of guilt.

She’s a blessing, a second chance, you need to appreciate every. single. minute.

I do. I know this. I know this so deep that it hurts and it pulls and that tight rope of spaghetti goes all wobbly and cannot be controlled and then I fall.

Because I’m still human.

I’m still a mother and parenting is hard.

Parenting with the shadows of fear and loss only make it that much harder and more slippery of a path.

What my {Picky} 4year old ate this week

2012-02-12T20:28:00.000-06:00

If you are a parent who is fighting with a picky eater (like I was) I wanted to offer you some home. Sixth months after changing the way we make dinner, my picky eater has completely changed how she eats. It's not only making dinner pleasant but she is willing to try new things, so much so that she now takes a sandwich that is not peanut butter for lunch almost everyday!

Yes my daughter now eats Salami!

I thought it would be fun and maybe a little helpful to see what she has eaten this week.

White Chicken Chili with Hominy

What she ate:
- All the chicken from her bowl
- A dozen of the beans (traded for tortillas chips)
- A clementine for dessert

Whole Wheat Pasta with Chicken Sausage and Roasted Vegetables

What she ate:

- All the noodles

- A red onion!!!!!

- A red pepper!!!!!

- All the sausage

Pasta Arrabiata

This was a special request from our son who wanted that "tube pasta with the bacon".

What she ate:

- Pasta

- one tomato

Roasted Pork Sandwiches

The popcorn was a surprise for the kids because we were trying to make dinner with what was in the house.
What she ate:
-popcorn
- the pork
She actually took apart the sandwich and peeled the pork out from the provolone cheese. (note my spinach is on my sandwich).

Italian Wedding Soup

What she ate:
- the turkey meatballs
- bread

Cornflake Crusted baked chicken

What she ate:
- All the chicken then asked for more and ate it off the leg
- a bite of potato
- all her corn

Now I feel I also have to add a disclaimer now that I have all our meals lined up we don't normally have so many "bowl" meals in one week and we almost never have pasta twice in one week. We try to honor the kids request when they ask for good and healthy dishes so we when our son asked for arrabiata we wanted to honor it even though we already had the roasted vegetable pasta on the menu.

You can get all the recipes from our challenge on my pinterest board.

What are you and your kids eating this week?

Sibling Love {Simple Moments, Bigger Picture}

2012-02-10T11:10:00.003-06:00

It’s one thing to witness the pure baby love from your older children when you bring home a new baby. I mean who doesn’t love a new cuddly little baby.

It’s another thing to watch them continue to love on her when she is an almost walking, almost toddler who screeches and takes up a lot of mom and dads attention and patience.

Some of the sweetness to love this week:

Watching a little sister become a big sister through leading and guiding. We may have melted when she took her baby sister's hand and helped her walk across the room.

Mornings have been a bit rough around here do to lack of sleep, in fact just go read Heather because that’s many of my mornings (and it's something every mother/parent should read and take to heart). Yesterday however we slept 7 hours!!!! So the morning was going a bit smoother.

It started with big kid snuggles in my bed. Although nothing could convince them to call off school and stay there all day.

Than came morning cuddles and sweet calm nursing with a snugly, well rested baby. We had just finished and she was sitting in my lap cooing and just being cute when her door squeaks. We both turn to see some little hands reaching through the door. She immediately starts bouncing on her bottom, squealing and giggling with delight.

The door flies open and her big brother and sister fall into the room in a bundle of giggles and smiles. She completely explodes with happiness. Giggles! Squeals! Bouncing! They all collapse into a big giggling group hug and my heart simply explodes.

It’s one thing for us to show love and teach love to our children but to see that love and joy flowing from them on their own between each other? It’s magical and makes me wonder how you ever decide to stop having more children?

Live.

Simple, sweet sibling loev, that’s my Simple Moment, Bigger Picture this week. What’s yours?

Capture.

Link up yours at Undercover Mother this week.

Share.

Please be sure to link to your post, not your blog. Your post must link back here or have our button (found on the sidebar).

Encourage.

Try to visit the other participants and encourage each other in this journey we call life.

We are focusing on little moments of love this month. This week we are focusing on sweetness, what's your sweet moment of love this week?

A Sweet Life

2012-02-07T20:05:00.000-06:00

It sneaks up on you.

The sweetness of a life you never expected.

You find it in scribbles on the floor.

In fresh flowers adoring the table.

The little bits and pieces of your children’s hearts decorated and hung on the wall.

This time of year can be dreary and dark, for me especially.

I have two angels that show me sweetness everyday. One in heaven shinning through her eyes her with me and covering me in kisses.

So we hang heart on a banister.

We greet strangers and friends alike with a heart and love.

Perhaps a little extra sweetness to chase away the grey as it tries to sneak in.

And I keep looking, keep stretching my eyes to find all those little bits of sweetness that I might not see if I wasn’t looking.

A Day in the Life of Me

2012-02-06T00:30:00.000-06:00

I always love when Alita does her ten on ten photo days. I have wanted to participate for a long time but never actually know what day it is until the day is half over.

So this past Friday I broke out the camera and joined in Rebekah's A Day in the Life.

Here is a slice of my everyday. Click on the photo to see the full image or see them as a set at Flickr.

Favorite Vegetarian Meals {Savory Sunday}

2012-02-05T08:00:00.000-06:00

I mentioned yesterday that after six months on this meal challenge we are really embracing change and have been doing more vegetarian meals. These are our favorite dishes so far. Remember you can get all our recipes on the Update Our Meals Challenge Board.

I mentioned that my husband has become obsessed with curry, this spicy vegetable curry is his favorite. He eats it served on basmanti rice.

Easy Chickpea Curry

Source: marthastewart.com via Melissa on Pinterest

Which happens to be made with one of my favorite new recipes:

Cauliflower Steaks with Roasted Pepper and Tomato Salad

Source: marthastewart.com via Melissa on Pinterest

Everyone enjoyed this meal even my picky eater who calls it white broccoli. We served it over whole wheat couscous. We're looking forward to trying it again over the summer with veggies from our garden and doing it on the grill!

This soup was not a super flavorful soup, I think it needed more broth, but I really enjoyed it as did PBboy and PBbaby threw a temper tantrum when it was gone. We added the tortillas individually to the bowls so they wouldn't get soggy.

Tortilla Soup with Black Beans

Source: marthastewart.com via Melissa on Pinterest

The last one was a recipe we were sure would be a bust and actually turned out really good and everyone liked it was a roasted vegetable pot pie. I can't find the recipe online right now so I will have to get that posted another time.

Do you do a Meatless Monday or some other regular vegetarian night? What are your families favorites?

Meat and Potatoes to Vegitarian {Savory Saturday}

2012-02-04T13:36:00.001-06:00

I took quite a bit of flack over at Mamapedia when I posted over there about fixing our picky eater. Several of the commenter's told me I was wrong, and cruel and basically that you can’t teach an old dog new tricks that picky eaters were born and I should stop trying to change my daughter.

I want to address that with a big fat, Nope, uh-uh and sorry charlie but you actually can teach an old dog new tricks.

For one I am a reformed picky eater. I did not eat a fresh strawberry, a stalk of asparagus or spinach in any form until I was well into my twenties and met my husband. Kale (ad all cooked greens really) have been repulsive to me for years. Now? Spinach has for the last few years been one of my favorite veggies. Since starting this challenge I have a new found love for kale and collard greens. Sometimes the root of picky-ness is actually in how things are prepared. I still don’t care for cabbage but have had it in several recipes where it wasn’t bad. There is now just about nothing that I won't at least try. When as a child I wouldn't even eat white rice.

Example two: My husband is a meat and potatoes kind of guy. His motto is anything can be made better with bacon or pork. After our second week of detox we decided to throw the kids a bone and make them macaroni and cheese and a ham steak. He ate leftover spicy vegetable curry. In fact he has become obsessed with curry. After that night he said to me, "you know what I think I could do this vegetarian thing, not all the time but a lot of the time". Since then we have been having two vegetarian meals a week.

My meat and potatoes husband is enjoying being a vegetarian. He has learned to enjoy meals where meat is not the focus after 35 years of loving meat. If he can change, so can I, so can my daughter so can anyone*.

So how’s my picky eater doing? She is doing really well. She may not like everything but she will at least try everything we give her and we rarely, if ever have tears at dinner anymore. In fact the only fight we have had over dinner in the last month has really come out of exhaustion on all our parts and not entirely from a fight over food.

So stick with it parents! My family, me, my daughter and my meat and potatoes husband are proof that you can change your families eating habits.

Here are a few of my tips for what has worked for us:

Before you start commit to one month where you will not (WILL NOT) make any of the go to foods, for us it was macaroni and cheese. We made sure there was none in the house so we wouldn't be tempted to give up and we planned our meals accordingly.
Have at least two predictable nights where they know they will like the food. We do pizza on Saturday and chili on Sunday both nights she loves what she gets.
If possible modify. When recipes are hot and spicy we will generally leave the hot seasoning out until the end and pull out some for the kids and add more to ours. We don’t leave them without seasoning we just make it milder. Sometimes we will make an additional frozen vegetable if the only vegetable is say cabbage, which we know is hard for anyone other than my husband to get down.
Be consistent and don’t give in or fight. We had been fighting this battle for years. YEARS. and nothing changed until we (the parents did). We no longer got angry at the table, we did not beg, plead or bribe. We simply sated this is dinner, one bite of each is required or you can go to bed. End of story. It was the same every night no matter what. Sometimes that meant that my husband or myself would have to walk away from the table and cool down but the table because a peaceful no fighting zone.
Know that you are not going to scar them or ruin them by sending them to bed hungry. They will wake up and if they are under 4 have little to no memory of the day. They wake up ready to go, a new day a new slate. Don’t bring your frustration or anger form the previous meal to today's meal.
Work on one meal at a time. We only do dinner breakfast and lunch is always (ALWAYS) her choice.

Making family meals fun and nutritional for everyone is work, but we are almost sixth months into our journey and it has been an incredibly rewarding experience and we are all enjoying dinner time much more.

Come back tomorrow and I will share with you are {new} favorite vegetarian dishes!

*I am referring to children and people who do not have allergies or special needs in case that's not clear (which apparently at Mamapedia it wasn't) I would never force a child who had physically or mental difficulties or allergies to foods to eat things that are clearly upsetting them. My daughter does not have these issues she is just stubborn, like her mama.

Real Motherhood

2012-02-03T11:21:00.001-06:00

A real, tired, un-showered, un primped mother

What is real?

Look around your space how much of what you are looking at right now at this moment is real? I’m looking at beautiful watercolors of Venice and Florence. The paintings are of real places but they are art. An artist interpretation of what his eye saw.

There is a stack of magazines on the floor, newspapers, ads. They are filled with supposed “real” people. But they aren’t real. They have been styled, made up, airbrushed, posed. They have been turned into art by the photographer stylist, designer. They are real things presented as an interpretation of that persons idea of perfect yet they are sold to us as reality.

I want my daughters to know real.

Real beauty, real bodies.

We protect them from a lot. We don’t have cable. My women’s magazines are kept hidden and we don’t get Victoria’s Secret catalogs. They watch princess movies yes, but that is as far as Disney penetrates our house. There is no Glee, no High school Musical, no pop music. We are currently doing our best to keep Barbie at bay. We have been called prude told we are sheltering our children.

Shelter I will, for as long as I can for I want my daughters to know what Real beauty is, what real women look like.

That was my five minutes but I have more to say.

Casey is amazing. She is brave and beautiful and she bared her soul and belly over at Babble to help our girls, our society see that real women don’t strut down the cat walk weeks after having babies.

It's easy to beat ourselves up, especially as new first time moms. You don't see other's flaws only their perfections. We see snippets of moms and celebrities online, and they seem perfect. We compare our worse to their best. It's easy to believe that the painted picture of perfection is reality.

Reality is not perfect.

Reality is messy and broken and scratched and stretched, scared and healed.

This is reality

11.5 months postpartum

4 pregnancies

3 c-sections

1 umbilical hernia repair

That belly created beauty that surrounds me every day with little hands and hearts and sweet baby kisses. That my daughters will know that this is the reality of motherhood and it is beautiful .

Little Cupid {Simple Moments, Bigger Picture}

2012-02-02T11:22:00.000-06:00

She is our little lover.

She is out most empathetic child. She will cry when others are crying or yelling. In the church nursery I was holding a friend who is just a few weeks older than her. She was sad and missed her mommy ad was just sitting in my lap whimpering. My little PBbaby crawled over to her, tilted her head to the side in deep thought and then started kissing her cheeks.

Moments like that happen everyday, multiple times a day.

She will throw herself from your arms if her sister, or especially her brother, come into a room after being gone. She throws herself on them to hug and kiss them.

Stuffed animals found in her path are picked up and hugged. No baby doll comes within arms reach of her without being given kisses.

I love it about her.

She will stop playing to crawl over to me and give me a kiss, for no reason. She has just started doing this throw her arms open wide and fall into you hugs. Wrapping her tiny little arms around your neck and sighing.

It's a gift and a reminder every single day that she was sent to heal us. To spread love and joy and heal broken hearts.

Love.

Healing.

Joy.

Through chubby arms, messy faces and plump little lips puckered up to mine

Live.

Simple acts of love, that’s my Simple Moment, Bigger Picture this week. What’s yours?

Capture.

Link up yours at Alita Jewel's Treasures this week.

Share.

Please be sure to link to your post, not your blog. Your post must link back here or have our button (found on the sidebar).

Encourage.

Try to visit the other participants and encourage each other in this journey we call life.

We are focusing on little moments of love this month. A moment, a proposal, your first kiss, the first time you looked in their eyes....will you share your little moments of love with us?

Pendulum

2012-02-01T13:09:00.001-06:00

Photos Credit

This season of life is a ride on a pendulum. Swinging from here to there, a push a pull.

The pull of desires, dreams, goals unfulfilled. The push to do this, that and the other.

It leaves you off balanced and teetering

Focus on the pull, get knocked over by the push. Focus on the push get pulled backwards by the pull.

So you hang on tight.

Swing left and right, front and back. Knowing that a pendulum will always come back to where it started eventually.

Eventually.

Holding her up

2012-01-30T21:38:00.002-06:00

Inspired by Bigger Picture Blogs Creative Inspiration Today I worked on this story some more, from his view. Warning, this did not have the editing time the last piece had it was just a quick free write.

-------------------------

He looks up at her with fear and sadness in his eyes. Who is this woman in front of him? A shell of her former self. Where is the spark, the light, the love that used to radiate from her. She could brighten a room and his mood with just a look, a small smile. Now she is a crumbled mass in his arms. Deep sobs racking her whole body. He doesn’t know what to do, what to say so he just rubs her head, kisses the top of it gently and whispers, "it will be okay".

But will it he wonders?

He pulls her up and cups her face in his hands. Willing her to look him in the eyes, to see how much he loves her, to see that while everything has changed they are still the same. The same couple that loves and cares for each other. The couple that holds hands as they walk down the street. Who would rather spend a date night at a burger joint than a fancy restaurant. Who will sit on their back porch talking about everything and nothing for hours.

“We will get through this” he whispers to her with a gaze so serious and intent. He is trying to bore his words onto her brain, make her see through her pain. “I love you, and you love me and we together we will hold each other up and we will figure this out”.

She does’t speak, she just closes her eyes and lets her head fall from his hands onto his chest. Tears streaming down her face, soaking his shirt.

He collapses to the floor into a crumpled pile of limbs, bringing her down with him. Together they sit, a tangled pile of humanity and emotions. In the darkness of this space he allows the tears to fall from his eyes. They mingle with hers and form rivers of pain that pool on his shirt. How did they get here? Just a few weeks earlier they were celebrating the image of their little “peanut” as they named him and now this.

Now there was nothing. Nothing but a crumbled imaged stained from her tears and a broken wife laying in his arms.

Savory Sunday: Peanut Butter Spoons

2012-01-29T20:09:00.000-06:00

A quick post for your Sunday evening.

You may or may not know that I have a love for Peanut Butter. It's practically a food group on it's own in our house as my daughter loves it too. If you want to really make me happy, add chocolate to it, that is a match made in heaven. In fact I have an entire Pinterest Board called "Peanut Butter in my Belly" that is, mostly chocolate peanut butter recipes.

However sleep deprivation, three kids, school jobs, stuff, stuff, and more stuff means I don't always have time to bake all, or any, of those wonderful goodies.

Sometimes thought it's necessary to have a sweet peanut butter chocolate treat. You just need a little to take the craving edge of when you are dieting or it may be that time of the month wen you need a little extra chocolate. Whatever it is I have invented (or modified a basic principle) the perfect less than a minute to prep chocolate peanut butter snack.

Peanut Butter Spoons

1. Dip spoon into jar of peanut butter (I prefer crunchy) and scoop a heaping spoonful

2. Sprinkle, roll, dip, otherwise cover with one of the following:

mini chocolate chips
chocolate chips
M&M's
Any other kind of chocolate bits and pieces you may have around

3. Eat and be happy.

Personally M&Ms have become my favorite, they really do make it the perfect snack.

Do you have a go to quick and easy guilty snack pleasure? Are you on Pinterest? Share your link so I can follow you!

Pin It