A lot of what determines this is simple logistics: the what/where/when of your planning and execution. The underlying principle of good logistics is, in the simplest terms, always planning with sex in mind. Even if your dates don’t lead to sex—and they often won’t—planning for the best-case scenario will make you more successful, more often.

Good date-logistics start with the basics: picking a suitable venue and time. There’s no perfect place, so don’t obsess over this. Don’t plan anything complicated, distracting, or otherwise gratuitous, like skydiving or horseback riding. Since you’re supposed to be “getting to know each other,” you’re not going to raise any eyebrows by picking a simple bar or night lounge. Night is always better than day. And it’s always best to go to a place that serves alcohol, since coffee-shop or restaurant dates rarely lead to any kind of intimacy. Your goal is to establish a mood.

Coffee shops simply don’t provide the atmosphere for physical escalation. When was the last time you saw a guy make out with a girl at Starbucks? Restaurants are even worse. A girl with a full stomach is a girl with an empty vagina. The digestion process pulls blood away from the reproductive organs for both of you—especially if it’s a heavy meal with tons of cheese and meat. So even if she wanted to have sex before the meal, she’s not going to want to while she’s busy digesting and secretly farting every five minutes. Food also absorbs alcohol. So even if you drink eating, she’s not going to get into that relaxed, fun mood that is conducive to sex.

Schedule your dates after standard dinner time. If you end up in a place where they serve food, and the girl announces she’s hungry, say “you get food, I already ate.” She’ll likely get something small, so she doesn’t appear like a total porker in front of you—or will ask you to split something with her, where you can further control the selection. (The exception, of course, is if she’s fat, where she’s already demonstrated little shame in her eating behavior, as telegraphed by her sloppy physique that loudly advertises her love for food to the entire world.) Best case: avoid places that serve anything beyond light “tapas.”

Some bars are definitely better than others. It’s best if you already have venues in mind that are cool, comfortable, not too crowded or loud, and most importantly, conveniently located. That “perfect bar” that requires taking three buses or driving 45 minutes on the interstate to get there is going to do you no good. Ideally, you want to pick a venue from which you can easily and comfortably move to your place (or hers). It doesn’t need to be next door (this, in fact, might seem a little too transparent), but it should be accessible. Oftentimes, the only thing that keeps a girl from coming home with you is that it’s somehow difficult, time-consuming, or awkward. You need to anticipate and remove as many of those objections ahead of time as you can.

Smart venue selection can make all the difference between a memorable night with your date and another night of jerking off to Internet porn. Plan ahead and reap your rewards.

We’ve all been there. You met a girl out, and you did everything “right”: maybe you rubbed your boner against her for half-an-hour to some shitty music; you had her laughing at all your well-honed stories; maybe you even made out with her in the corner. You correctly tried to bounce from the bar with her, but she didn’t “want to leave her friends.” But she practically threw her number at you and you figured you had this one on lock-down. Then, after following the classic text conventions, you get nothing. There are a million ways this scenario plays out, but the theme is the same: guy has number, things look good, and the girl goes dark.

To fully comprehend this situation, you have to understand what you’re up against. Girls nowadays give out their numbers like candy. There are multiple reasons for this. For one, it’s the path of least resistance. Think about it: the quickest way to get a guy off your case is to give him your number, comfortably extricate yourself from the situation, and then just ignore his lobs. Girls avoid confrontation and awkwardness at all costs. But that only explains a situation where they don’t like the guy. What about when she showed clear signs of attraction?

We’re living in a world of endless distractions. The deadly combination of Facebook, ever-shrinking attention-spans, and the inherently flakey nature of young girls (especially American ones) conspire to create a bad situation. Cute girls have unlimited options. In other words, there’s a good chance you weren’t the only guy who rubbed your boner against her that weekend. What’s more, girls are forgetful. She could have fantasized about being impregnated by you the night she met you, but within an hour she forgot about that because she got a text from some other guy. This is a double-edged sword that can work to your advantage as much as it can hurt you, as we shall see.
So what do you do when a girl doesn’t reply to your text? Well first, let’s cover what you shouldn’t do. First off, resist the temptation of chasing down your text with a follow-up because you think, “she obviously didn’t get it.” She got it. Today’s girl is glued to her phone 24/7, and she’s reading and replying to texts constantly. The odds that the ether swallowed up your text before it got to her iPhone 9 are infinitesimal. Get that out of your head. Secondly, don’t go to the other extreme and do what a lot of experienced pickup artists mistakenly do: immediately delete her number and write her off. Remember: effectively texting girls requires a Zen-like patience that is counter-intuitive to our hunting nature. Just chill.

A certain percentage of the time just forgetting about your text is enough. I’ve had girls reply to me, literally, days later. We end up making plans, and I end up banging them in the long run. But a lot of the time that doesn’t happen. That’s where the re-start text comes in.

The restart text is basically simple text volley that aims at resurrecting a conversation that’s gone cold. It can work at any stage in your interaction with a girl: when all you have is the phone number; when you’ve gone out once but things fizzled; and even after you’ve banged her and lost touch with her because you moved on voluntarily. The important precursor is that you fully allow the conversation to actually go cold. I rarely send a restart text sooner than 10 days than my last communication. The goal of the restart text, simply told, is to re-spark the intrigue the girl presumably felt for you at some point. That’s all. It’s not a logical appeal to re-contact you because “you thought you had a good time.” This is where a girl’s forgetfulness works to your advantage. By the time you come around a second time, she’s likely forgotten about some stupid thing you said that made her stop contacting you in the first place, or about the other guy who temporarily knocked you out of the first-place position. Often it’s just as simple as catching a girl when she’s more amenable to having sex.

Two Different Types of Restart Texts

The restart text is an art that you have to customize to your own style and to each situation, but these are some basic techniques to get you started. Create your own text following these approaches.

1. The Mistaken Identity. This is probably the oldest, and most transparent, approach. Girls, especially the smarter ones, can sometimes see right through this one—even though that doesn’t mean it won’t work. After all, it’s all about plausible deniability. The important part is to make it clear that it wasn’t intended for her. It’s also nice to embed some juicy bait that she just won’t be able to resist.

Example: “sorry I’m running late, homie. got into argument with andy’s ugly sister. u were right about her!”

2. The Non Sequitur. This is basically a random, brief particle that will sufficiently stir a girl’s nosy instinct into inquiring further. Don’t make it creepy or gratuitously weird. The key is to wedge yourself into that nosy part of a girl’s brain that makes eavesdropping, celebrity gossip, and “mysterious guy” in the room irresistible to her.

Example: “it was $20.”

If she responds, you should follow that up with something like “oops, wrong person.”, adding a juicy tid-bit to have her respond a second time, like “wait, who’s this?” Once you re-activate the conversation, don’t make the mistake of bringing up your prior interaction or immediately revealing your identity or intentions (to plan a date). Also, don’t text endlessly with her. Dangle the carrot for a while—leaving gaps of different lengths between texts—get her interested, and plan to “meet up.” Keep it simple.

A lot of the time, the restart text won’t work. But it should definitely be part of your arsenal. You’ll be delightfully surprised when you re-capture a seemingly lost prospect with this simple, nearly effortless, technique.

If you’re like me, you’ve spent a lot of time in cities with droves of panhandling homeless people. In fact, for a significant part of my life, it’s been nearly impossible for me to get from Point A to Point B without being hit up for change at least once. Sometimes, I’d get asked for money by the same person on the way to my destination and on the return trip. With that much practice, one thing you get pretty good at doing is identifying the different techniques these guys use. There aren’t that many and, even when a guy is trying to be subtle about it, he usually telegraphs some sign that sets off your I’m-about-to-get-asked-for-money alert system.

Another area you hone is your arsenal of ways to say no. You can turn them down verbally, with a simple “sorry” or “I don’t have any” excuse; more gently, by giving a subtle “no” head-shake or shrugging-of-the-shoulders; or by preventing the interaction altogether, by speeding up or avoiding eye contact. Your skills improve with every solicitation. I had a friend who even figured out a way to stop his car just the right way at freeway entrances, so that when panhandlers approached his car, he could keep it crawling long enough for the light to turn green.

So what does all of this have to do with being a pickup artist?

I call it the homeless alarm. That same feeling you get when you absolutely know you’re about to get hit up for change by a homeless guy during the day—while just trying to go about your business—is the same feeling a cute girl gets when a “random guy” approaches her with low-quality or sloppy game. It doesn’t take much to set off that alarm and, because you can’t unring that bell, you want to avoid it at all costs. It automatically makes it a lot less likely that you’re going to get any “money” out of her.

Even if she’s pretty young, she’s lived with bad game for years, and pretty much knows all the common, lame approaches average guys use. And, just like my friend’s car-crawling technique, she’s developed a set of techniques of her own for dismissing each of them quickly or, in most cases, avoiding the situation entirely. Even when a guy tries to be subtle about these crappy moves, she instinctively knows he wants something from her, and that he has little to offer in return besides an extended, open hand. She may listen for two seconds, but she’s actively looking for a way to get out of the discussion.

So how do you avoid setting off the homeless alarm?

Top-notch day game hinges on subtlety. Approaching girls during the day isn’t the same as being in a nightclub, where being direct and to-the-point about your intentions is not usually a problem and, in fact, often gets you results. In a way, this is what makes day game easier. So much of being successful during the daytime is about being in a mindset that probably more closely resembles your natural state: just having a regular, innocent conversation with “no intentions” going in.

When you approach a girl during the day, you have to think like a panhandler trying to avoid the setting off that alarm with the same, tired, transparent techniques every other guy on your block uses to try to get people to give up the change. You don’t want to look or seem “homeless.” It’s a sad testament, but if a clean, cool, well-spoken guy came up to you, chatted you up naturally, made you laugh, and after a while said, “hey, man, can I bum fifty cents off of you? I just realized I’m a little short for a sandwich,” you’d probably give it to him.

Be that guy. Don’t set off a girl’s homeless alarm until well into your conversation, after she’s already comfortable with you. You’ll be surprised at the “change” you collect by the end of the day.

An often-neglected part of that is optimizing your look. A lot of guys with serviceable game, as well as the killer instinct to deploy it, hold themselves back by not looking their best. One great thing about being a man is that looking good isn’t nearly as complicated as it is for girls. A basic understanding of fashion, your own physique, and your physical shortcomings can take you a long way. Even if you have average looks, an optimized look can make a world of difference. What’s more, because game is a feedback loop, looking good improves your overall confidence; the consequent swagger encourages more approaches; and more approaches improve your game.

Nice, stylish clothes that suit you are worth their weight in gold, but even if your whole closet is from Target, there are still things you can spend your money on to make yourself look better.

Good Face Wash and Lotion: $15-20

I’m surprised at the number of guys who walk around with dry-looking or greasy faces. Sure, you’re a man, but you’re not homeless. A healthy looking complexion can do a lot for making the panties wet—especially when a girl gets close enough to examine it or feel it. Every guy is different: maybe you sport a rugged, bearded face, or you may have a (relatively hairless) baby-face. But, whatever the case, you should at least wash and moisturize your face properly. Harsh soaps and bad shaves are often behind a lot of nasty skin problems. Go to your local “natural” beauty supply place—they all have men’s sections nowadays—or even your local drugstore, and buy a gentle cleanser and face moisturizer for your mug.

Whitening Toothpaste: $5

I’m not sure if this is a product of the Starbucks milkshake epidemic, but it seems like more and more people are walking around with brown or discolored teeth these days. I even see cute, young girls with rainbowed teeth. This is shocking, considering the number of teeth whitening products out there. I don’t recommend you go out a blast your teeth to glow-in-the-dark white with harsh bleaching agents, but it wouldn’t hurt to use a mildly whitening, national-brand toothpaste periodically. After drinking coffee or tea, rinse your mouth by swishing some clean water in your mouth. It makes a big difference. Just leave a little coffee in a white mug for few hours to see what coffee does to your teeth.

A Decent Haircut: $25-30

Nothing screams lame louder than a shitty, little-kid haircut. Still, the number of guys walking around with an unstylish cut is astounding. You don’t need to go out and spend a king’s ransom on a designer style, but look for one of these hipster barbershops that are popping up everywhere. They’re not dirt-cheap, but are still reasonably priced. Sit back and watch which of the stylists is giving a cool cut to a man and pick that person.  Don’t be afraid to ask your stylist what a good cut for you would be.

Hemming Your Jeans: $12-15

Whether your jeans are a crappy, squarish pair from Wal-Mart or an expensive pair you paid good money for, none of that matters if they’re dragging on the ground or are bagging up at the bottom because they’re too long for you. Decent tailors are a dying breed, but they still exist in nearly every major city. Bring your best stuff to a real tailor (not the dry cleaners) and get them altered. You can also have jackets or shirts fixed. The right fit goes a long way.

A Good Workout Book: $15-25

At the end of the day, nothing is going to make you look and feel better than being in good physical shape. The problem is that most guys know very little about exercising properly. If you’ve been to a gym more than once, you know exactly what I mean—you’ll see guys do the craziest things, like swinging a dumbbell over their heads like a lasso. If you’re straight-up overweight, you need to start with improving your diet. But, if you’re merely out of shape, weak-looking, or suffering from serious muscle imbalance, you need a good exercise program. I like Starting Strength, but look around for one that is well-rated online and suits your lifestyle and, most importantly, follow it.

Optimizing your look is an on-going process that you should be revisiting regularly. But these basic steps are a good place to start.

Day Bang is a 201-page book that teaches you how to pick up women during the day, primarily in a coffee shop, clothing store, bookstore, grocery store, subway, or on the street. It contains 51 openers, 23 long dialogue examples with commentary, and dozens of additional lines that teach by example.

Day Bang includes…

• The optimal day game mindset that leads to the most amount of success
• An easy mental trick to prevent your brain from going into a flight-or-fight response when it’s time to approach a woman you’re attracted to
• A detailed breakdown of how to use the “elderly opener,” an easy style of approach that reliably starts conversations with women
• 2 ways to tell if a girl will be receptive to your approach
• How to avoid the dreaded “interview vibe”
• 10 common mistakes guys make that hurt their chances of getting a number

Day Bang shares tons of tips and real examples on having successful conversations. It teaches you…

• How to use my bait system to get the girl engaged and interested in you
• How to segue out of the initial opening topic into a more personal chat where you’ll get to know the girl on a deeper level
• How to take the interesting things you’ve done (your accomplishments, hobbies, and experiences) and morph them into bait hooks that gets the girl intrigued enough to want to go out with you
• My “Galnuc” method to seamlessly get a girl’s number
• An easy hack at the end of your interactions that will reduce the chance of a flake and prime the girl for going out with you
• Ways to open up a conversation on a girl who isn’t giving you much to work with

Day Bang goes into painstaking detail on how to approach women in a variety of common environments…

• How to open a girl in coffee shops when she has a book, laptop, mp3 player, cell phone, research paper, crossword or Sudoku puzzle, or nothing at all
• Two methods for approaching a girl on the street, depending on if she’s moving or not, with a diagram to explain all the approach variations
• How to approach in a retail store or mall environment, with openers to use on customers or sales clerks
• How to approach in bookstores, with specific tips on how to customize your approaches in the cafe, magazine section, or general book aisles
• How to meet women in public transportation, on both the bus and subway
• How to meet women in grocery stores
• How to approach girls in secondary venues like a beach, casino, concert, gym, hair salon, handicraft fair, museum, art show, park, public square, or wine festival

Dozens of additional topics are logically organized into 12 chapters…

• Preparation. How to reduce your approach anxiety
• Opening. How to deliver your opener in a way that doesn’t scare women away
• Rambling. How to have conversations that make women interested in you
• Closing. How to get a number in a way that reduces the chance she’ll flake
• The Coffee Shop. How to pick up in coffee shops and cafes
• The Street. How to pick up outdoors
• The Clothing Shop. How to pick up in retail shops, malls, and big box stores
• The Bookstore. How to pick up in bookstores
• Public Transportation. How to pick up in the bus, subway, or long distance transportation
• The Grocery Store. How to pick up in grocery stores
• Other Venues. How to pick up just about anywhere else women can be found
• Putting It All Together. How to maximize your day game potential

The lessons taught in this 75,000 word, no-fluff textbook will help you meet women during the day. If you need tips on what to do after getting her number, consult my other book Bang, which contains an A-to-Z banging strategy. Day Bang focuses exclusively on daytime approaching.

Here’s a review by a reader who won a pre-release copy:

I was really excited to finally read Roosh’s take on day game. (That’s why I hit refresh about 1,000 times while trying to win it in the forum contest a few weeks back.) I was introduced to the concept by reading some of Jeremy Soul’s stuff from Love Systems, and I’ve loved reading Krauser’s uber-alpha take on it. It’s funny though, as both of them focus on approaching much the same way you do in night game: walk around, see a target you like, and then go open her.

I tried it out for a bit and found decent success, but it seemed so forced, much like the whole Mystery Method of night game. I don’t have the best game at night, but mostly my game is predicated on setting up what appears to be random bumps/introductions/questions, etc. As a result, it seems just entirely natural, and I’ve had many girls say that to me in bed afterwards, that they liked how I didn’t try to pick them up – it just naturally happened (which is, of course, not true).

I didn’t know what to expect from Roosh on this topic, but I’m already a big fan of his. His approach to game seems the least contrived of anyone out there. And after reading Day Bang, he cements his position as the guru for normal people. It is a method/philosophy that fits me like a glove.

I’ve always been an outgoing person, so the concept of the elderly ramble was not only hilarious, but something pretty close to what I do on a regular basis. But seeing it codified really hit home. Roosh focuses much more on situational pick ups than the street game so favored by others, and again, it just seems so much more natural. If I had to summarize Day Bang in one sentence, it would be “Day Game for Actual Humans”.

I could really go on at length, but the book is worth it even if just for getting to understand the idea of the elderly ramble or to internalize the metaphor of girls as cats during the day (Every day when I’m walking around the city, my head keeps saying “Don’t scare the cat.”). At its core, he gives simple rules like this to keep in your head until they become unconscious behaviors. The first half of the book is basics like this, which culminates in “Galnuc”. At first, I had no idea what that meant either – but after he explains it, it’s like every other one of his concepts. A simple explanation and map for a reality you already knew existed but couldn’t describe. Seriously, between the ramble, don’t scare the cat and Galnuc – that’s like 80% of the battle. And since I can internalize that quickly, I can begin to live in the moment, instead of focusing on mechanics.

I think this is Roosh’s best gift. He’s explaining simple fundamentals – things that no longer need explaining to him, as he has progressed well past them – however, despite his distance from such a beginner’s mindset, he’s able to lay out the structure in such clear and relaxed language. There’s none of that boot-camp “Approach 1,000 women now, private!” bullshit, just some of the best writing style in all of the game community. It never feels like he’s writing a book or talking from on high about how things have to be; you really don’t feel his ego coming through the pages like you do with other game writers.

The book concludes with just a ton of information on how to succeed in some particular locations. From simple tips – to full-on diagrams of coffee shops and more. The breakdowns of each place let you begin to see how he thinks, and that is the type of learning that builds you into a more complete man instead of a robot with pickup lines.

Somehow, Day Bang wasn’t at all what I was expecting. I had gotten used to the idea of day game being exclusively about street pickups. But after reading it, I feel like day game isn’t some big thing I have to conquer, it’s just going to become part of my life. Congrats Roosh. Job well done. And again, the writing style was so natural and flowed so well. You have honed a true skill.

Click one of the following links to learn more:

• Full details on what’s inside
• Ten full-length sample pages
• Details on how to order a copy in paperback or ebook

Thanks to everyone for being patient while I worked on this book. I think you’ll find that it was worth the wait.

Guys formulate all sorts of ridiculous excuses for why they don’t or shouldn’t approach girls on a regular basis. Picking up girls isn’t easy, and the human mind can play all sorts of crazy tricks to spare you the pain of rejection and the anxiety of approaching a complete stranger. But these excuses are deadly for your game. They swirl around in your head, crippling you from the inside out. Even if a guy continues to approach girls through these excuses, he will transmit an insecure vibe that will severely limit his success.

“The type of girls I like don’t like guys that are of my race”

Race-based excuses are among the most common I hear. I find that they’re most prevalent in guys whose cultures emphasize “modesty” or are racially homogenous (e.g., East Asian cultures, India), but it’s not limited to any one group. The truth is: if you live in large city and pay even a little attention, you will see men of your race with girls from other races. Whether you’re an Indian or Asian guy that wants to go out with white girls, or a white guy that wants to go out with Asian girls, don’t let racial insecurity blind you of your opportunities. Girls want cool, interesting guys. Period. Find an example of a famous, successful man in your race and emulate his style and swagger.

“I’m too short”

There’s no doubt that being tall is an advantage. Every inch over “average” will work in your favor with a lot of girls. That said, I see below-average guys with cute girls all the time. And, of course, I meet plenty of goofy tall guys with no girls or with ugly fatties on their arm. If you’re stocky or short, hit the gym. If you’re below-average height, wearing form-fitting clothing that “adds length” to your stature will do miracles for your appearance, as will maintaining an ideal, slender build.

“I want a nice girlfriend or wife, not to be a pick-up artist”

This is probably the most common—and ridiculous—of the bunch. What guys who believe this don’t realize is that in order to get a quality girlfriend, they need to have the skills to capture her. If you think she’s girlfriend material that likely means that, at any given moment, several guys are thinking the same thing. Plus, a nice, attractive girl gets hit on by several random guys a day.

If you haven’t developed your game skills, there’s no way you’re going to be able to snare your dream girl—even if you do find her. That’s like owning a store and saying you just want one customer to come in and buy all your merchandise so you can retire. The retail business doesn’t work like that and neither does game. The interesting thing is that what you think you want is liable to change once you get to know (and bang) other girls. In other words: you don’t really know what you want.

“When I have money/success I’ll have to beat the girls back with a stick.”

If you believe this, I can guarantee you one thing: you’re in for a major disappointment in a few years. Money doesn’t hurt your chances with girls, but it’s one of the most overrated things in the world of pickup. There’s a reason that high-end escort services are ridiculously profitable: all the lonely rich guys that are working 80 hours weeks to support their lavish lifestyle. For every rich guy with a hot girl, there are 10 dirt-poor artists or street guitarists with a harem of hot girls. Girls like social proof, and money alone doesn’t prove much. Making your money as an international pop star, for example, is way different than making it as a buttoned-down, overworked investment banker. Money by itself won’t make girls—apart from the occasional gold-digger—attracted to you. Don’t waste your best years working your ass off and celibate. Pick up girls while you’re making your bones so that you can get even better ones later, by smartly leveraging your loot.

If any of these excuses sound familiar, you should immediately start working on ridding yourself of this game-killing baggage.

Approaching is the hardest part of the game. There is nothing natural or easy about walking up to a girl you don't know and talking to her in a way that makes her laugh, builds attraction, and ends with her giving you her phone number.

After approaching hundreds of different girls with all types of openers, I finally settled on two that are my "defaults," meaning they are powerful enough that I can use them regardless of the girl or the environment. I share them in my book Bang, along with others you can use for bars, clubs, daytime spots, and even the gym. It has 64 pages on Early Game that focus exclusively on the approach and what to say immediately after. I share dozens of conversation tips with tons of word-for-word examples, and I also teach you the concept of threads to keep the interaction going without having awkward silences.

You can take the time to make up openers on your own, experimenting over the next several months, or you can learn mine and get started using something that works off the bat. If you want to learn my favorite natural openers that are easy to use and actually work, click here to learn more about my book Bang today.

A lot of guys complain incessantly that all of this has made planning dates more difficult, made flaking easier, and added undue challenges to building up a girl’s comfort level with you. Those are all fair criticisms. But don’t waste your energy bemoaning things you can’t change. Girls have been difficult since time immemorial. Cavemen probably complained that their girls were so stubborn they needed to be dragged by the hair into their (literal) man-caves. Some things will never change.

Texting is a double-edged sword, to be sure. It has its definite downside, but also built-in advantages. And, like anything else, it requires its own set of rules. Your goals with texting are simple: to minimize flaking, maximize response rates, and get a girl to go out with you.

Here are ten text game tips for getting dates with girls:

1. When in doubt, keep it simple. Know the limits of the technology. Don’t try to charm your way into a girl’s pants in a black-and-white, 160-character message completely divorced of tone and delivery. It never works. Also, you can bet your bottom dollar that, if she’s cute, she gets dozens of texts per day. She reads them with a cursory glance, not with a keen eye for your subtle nuance.

2. Largely ignore the rules of grammar. It’s a sad state of affairs that good grammar makes you look bad with girls but, when it comes to texting, it often does. A perfect text communicates that you’re trying hard and that communicates neediness—a kiss of death. Don’t come across as a totally illiterate moron but, unless your target is a Ph.D. student in English Literature, leave a few capitalization and punctuation flaws in place.

3. Use jokes, emoticons, and exclamation points sparingly. Don’t fall for the trap of trying to soften a risky statement with a smiley face or trying to manufacture excitement with all of your exclamations points!!! Emoticons, except when they’re absolutely necessary, make you seem timid and girlish. Real men use periods.

4. Follow the old phone-call commandments. Some of the same things that were cardinal rules when you used to actually call girls are cardinal rules with texts: wait 2-4 days to text a new prospect (especially resist the suicidal, same-night “it was good to meet you” text); suss out her future availability in person, while you’re getting the digits; and end the “discussion” on a high note—preferably by not responding.

5. Apply the “Jumbotron Test.” It’s annoying as all hell, but girls share everything with their stupid girlfriends. Keep that in mind when you’re thinking about pouring your bleeding Romeo-heart out in a last-ditch effort to regain her interest. If you would feel comfortable with it being projected on the big-screen at a sold-out New York Knicks game, proceed with confidence.

6. Cultivate a Zen-like patience at all times. Texting girls can require nerves of steel. Irrespective of how friendly she was the night she met you, know that she won’t respond to your texts right away, for a variety of reasons: she’s genuinely busy, she’s trying to seem uninterested, or she’s actually trying to ignore you. Resist the temptation of sending a desperation follow-up text. When she does respond, wait as long, or longer, than she did to respond to you (without seeming obvious about it by doing it at precise times). Your goal is to seem comfortable and non-needy.

7. Insulate yourself from flakiness by leaving the discussion open. When you succeed in making plans with your girl—which should be the principle function of your exchange—don’t leave the conversation in a place where you won’t have a reason to talk before date-night. This is especially important if the date is more than a couple of days away. For instance, leave the location or exact time undetermined, so you can re-open the discussion with something like, “hey, you ever been to big ron’s house of cheap beer?”

8. Know when to shut up or give up. Less is more. Even if a girl is vibing you and sending you a bunch of texts, don’t correspond endlessly with her because, sooner or later, you’re going to overstay your welcome. What’s more, the more you say, the more likely you are to say something stupid that will dry up her panties. Conversely, if a girl is obviously not interested or clearly avoiding making plans with you, let the conversation go.

9. Use the “restart text” wisely. Even if you don’t succeed in setting a date with a girl initially, you can often resurrect the exchange a few days later with a simple, random hello-text. This is especially the case if you didn’t overkill things in the first place. I’ve often succeeded by sending a restart text long after she forgot some stupid thing I said or because I caught her in a hornier mood.

10. Don’t over-think things. Always remember this: she’s not agonizing over the texts she’s sending you. If you find yourself staring at your phone for minutes at a time contemplating what to punch in or asking your friends what to say, go back to #1.

These tips apply to girls you haven’t banged yet. Once you have sex with a girl, you can somewhat relax on these rules, but until then you must be almost obsessive about keeping your text game tight.

Flirting and building attraction is crucial when it comes to helping the girl decide that she wants to sleep with you. Before I knew how attraction really worked, I'd approach a girl and talk about boring topics such as work or her favorite movies, and then she would politely excuse herself from the conversation only a couple minutes into it. But now I know better. When you talk about more interesting topics, she sees you as more interesting. It's as simple as that. With a couple additional techniques, the "interesting" is turned into strong attraction.

Once attraction is built you can get her number and take her on a date or go for the one night stand (my preferred method). I teach you how to do all this in my book Bang, which details my complete banging system with step-by-step strategies such as The Four Key Moves To Intimacy (for when you want to kiss her) and my bedroom technique for sealing the deal. And of course my book tells you how to keep a fun conversation going, whether you just met her or are on a date.

If you had a system for building strong attraction with random girls you meet, would you get laid more than you are now? If you answered yes, then click here to learn more about Bang today.

Yes, a big part of being good at game is compiling substantial knowledge on what to say to women in different situations and, with practice, developing the skill of endlessly manufacturing your own things to say. That’s the obvious, most visible (even stereotypical) part of being a pick-up artist. But there’s also a massive intangible, that’s as important—if not more so—to cultivate from the outset: what’s popularly known as “inner game,” but sometimes referred to as “swagger,” “posture,” or “confidence.”

If you asked me to list three things that every successful pick-up artist has in common, I’d probably list these items (in no particular order, since I think their relative intensity varies from case to case):

1. A High-Quality, Congruent Look. This includes his natural, god-given gifts, but more importantly, how he’s optimized that canvas with tight fashion choices and an appropriate grooming regimen.

2. Air-Tight Game. His ability to say and do cool and interesting things in virtually any situation and around diverse types of people—especially hot girls—and convert those interactions into sex.

3. Some Form of Social Proof . Anything publicly visible that demonstrates he’s accepted by desirable people, has exceptional skills of some kind, or is otherwise more “valuable” as a person (e.g., musical skills, talent, popularity, wealth).

Clearly, all of these build on one another and are closely interrelated. An impressive sense of style will naturally add to a guy’s social proof. Conversely, a guy’s social proof miraculously adds to his looks. Everybody knows various examples of this principle: the rich guy with a hot, young girlfriend or the guy with a hot girl on his arm getting looks from all the other girls in the bar.

But one thing that’s threaded deep into the shag of all three of those traits is inner game. Every successful pick-up artist has a rock-solid inner game, created by their advances in those three areas. Or, they’ve progressed in those three areas by virtue of their natural confidence and swagger. It works in both directions. It sounds complicated, but it’s a simple idea. When you look good, you feel good. When you feel good, you act like it. Ever notice that when you’re in a happy, upbeat mood you say funnier things and people tend to migrate toward you?

The opposite is also true. Look around: a cool, single guy that’s dressed stylishly top-to-bottom walks around with a different vibe than a downtrodden married sap with an oversized t-shirt, lame cargo shorts, pushing a baby carriage, with his fat wife walking ahead of him. Do you think girls would notice this difference? Of course. Swagger matters.

As you work on learning to say the right things to girls, go to right places, and not making rookie mistakes like lavishing girls with drinks, keep in mind that you should also be working on your inner game. You should always seek out situations, practices, and people that will enhance it. Optimize your look with nice clothes that fit you properly. Do interesting things that will generate fascinating experiences and, by extension, stories you can tell. Cultivate relationships with cool people that add to your cachet and not detract from it.

All of these things will build on your inner game and redouble the power of every one of your pick-up skills.

It’s best to accept that buying alcohol for girls you’re trying to bang is pretty much a necessary evil. Guys will tell tales about how they didn’t spend a single dollar on a girl and slept with her anyway or, in some exceptional cases, somehow made money in the deal. (In fact, I once spent $1.37 over the course of an entire two-month relationship with a girl, not counting gas money.) But absent those cases, alcohol is often an important factor in getting a girl into bed. Alcohol loosens a girl up, makes her comfortable with you, and makes her more amenable to sex. Even if you don’t pound it that night, having drinks with her builds positive memories of having “fun” with you, which eventually leads to the bang.

Does that mean you should start throwing drinks at random chicks in hopes of getting laid? Absolutely not. In fact, that’ll produce the opposite effect. Unless you buy girls drinks the right way, in the right setting, all you’re doing is crushing money into her vagina—and losing respect in the process. I can’t count the times I’ve seen a guy in a bar buy a random girl a drink, only to get a 10-minute courtesy conversation and nothing else. Girls go to bars and clubs precisely because these venues are among the most advantageous settings for them. For a small fee (or no cost at all), girls get massive attention (something they covet as much as we covet sex), the luxury of turning down dozens of horny guys, and free drinks from chump drink-providers.

Here’s how to avoid becoming a drink-chump:

1. Buy Drinks Only for Girls That Have “Earned It”. Buying drinks for girls you don’t know, who haven’t made any kind of investment in you (e.g., going out on a date), or given you anything (like a kiss) is a sucker’s game. Don’t fall into the trap of trying to impress a girl by buying her things. If a girl has come out with you on a “date,” made out with you in the corner, or bought you a drink earlier in the night, she’s probably earned a drink from you. If a girl has the temerity to ask you for a drink, hit her with a strong wise-crack (e.g., “would you prefer the cash?”) and the rest will take care of itself.

2. “I’ll Get the First Round”. I learned this line when I was first getting into game and it remains, to this day, one of the most powerful in my arsenal. It’s best saved for pre-bang drink “dates.” It communicates two important messages: (1) I’m not a total cheap-ass who won’t buy you anything; but also (2) I’m not your free-refills drinking fountain for the night. I still crack a smile when, after the first round, a girl takes out her purse and asks me what I want.

3. The Power of Sharing Drinks. There are occasions when you’re vibing a girl at the bar, you want to keep her happily buzzed, but don’t want to ruin the interaction (and your cash flow) by buying her a drink. A solid middle-ground is offering to share a drink with her. This accomplishes several things at once: it starts to subconsciously prepare her for fluid exchange with you, it allows you to “critique” the drink together, it keeps her drinking, and it keeps you from looking like a drink provider. Not only that, you can often take turns with her on buying drinks for you to share, further escalating the effects.

As long as you follow these three guidelines, the drinks you buy will help you connect with the girl instead of the other way around.