Pigtale: Straight from the Pig's Mouth

Ugly to Start With: Book Review

2012-01-23T15:50:00.001+05:30

Ugly to Start With is a series of interconnected short stories documenting the growing years of Jason Stevens. Penned by award winning author John Michael Cummings, Ugly to Start With is full of promises and nostalgia.

The reader is made to take the literary journey with Jason Stevens as the narrator. The setting of the stories is 1970s in Harper's Ferry that come alive with each passing chapter. The stories themselves are very visual and one can relate to them while going through the growing pains and experiences of Jason.

Each of the stories depict a particular emotional turbulence and are so well connected that the whole picture is nothing short of stunning. The various nuances of human nature; be it flaws or goodness come forth vividly through the vignettes.

John Michael Cummings has done an amazing job of bringing back memories of a life we no longer remember or care about. I don't know if it was intended or not but the stories follow a curve with the pace picking up from a dull start. My only complaint would be a missing strong last chapter. I would have really liked John to finish off the book with an upper cut and closing off on things. But that’s the way life is; isn't it. We all are looking for closures and that's what keeps us going.

The layout and quality of the stories are something that any author would envy (including me) and I have no hesitation in saying that this is a book all must read. If you want to see your life flash by, Ugly to Start With is a book you cannot afford to miss.

Disclosure: The author provided me with a review copy.

Catch Me If You Know How: Book Review

2012-01-19T15:27:00.000+05:30

Show me a person who has not heard of the Internet and I will stop writing this book review right now. I normally don't accept e-books for reviews as I just love the feel of a physical book (I know it sounds corny). When Travis Morgan approached me to review his book, Catch Me If You Know How, I obviously requested him to ship me a bound copy of the book. It turned out that the shipping cost would have been more than the cost of the book itself. Since the book was interesting going by various reviews, I agreed to review the book in its e-book avatar. I was not disappointed at all.

Travis Morgan's inspiration to write Catch Me If You Know How comes from his intent to help parents keep track of what their children are doing while online. The book doesn't profess snooping but is only meant for parents to keep their children out of harm's way while they use the Internet.

The Internet is full of illicit material, stalkers, pornography etc and it is everyone's nightmare to keep an eye on someone who is not supposed to fall prey to them. The book is very helpful for someone with workable knowledge of computers, browsers and the Internet. For an out and out IT guy, this book is of little or no help. What is in the book is something that a hardcore techie would already know about. If someone has to bypass the system, Catch Me If You Know How or any other book for that matter would be of no help. I'd rather place this book under the "IT Forensics for Dummies" category. Given the fact that Travis Morgan started working on this book a few years back, some of the information seems pretty outdated. Children have become a lot smarter since then.

But all said and done, I would not discount the intent of Travis Morgan as someone who is out there to spread the knowledge and make the online world a little safer. So if you are a parent or someone who has little knowledge of computers and would like to know what you can or can't do over the Internet, then this book is just for you.

Disclosure: The author provided me with a review copy in e-book format.

Shine in Kashmir: Book Review

2012-01-18T15:09:00.001+05:30

It's always a pleasure reading about India and its cultural diversity. One book or one author is not enough to capture the various shades of culture that is India. So when I came across Shine in Kashmir, I was obviously thrilled to review it. More so, because it has been written by D. Chris Castanga, who has traveled the world tasting various cultures.

Shine in Kashmir follows Justin Conrad, a 24 year old American through his journey in search of meaningful company, spirituality and the meaning of life. The book is one of the most amazing account of India that I have read in a long while. If you want to know the esoteric aspect of India, its people and culture seen through the eyes of a foreigner, this book is just for you.

All that Chris Castanga has done through Justin Conrad is soak-in the various cultures (and idiosyncrasies) of India and present them in the most vivid manner. In fact the descriptions are so visual, they made me cringe at some sections. Chris has portrayed India in such a realistic manner that it would make most Indians take offense...but that's the beauty of the narrative. It's so real that it's difficult to believe that it has been written by a non-Indian.

Justin Conrad's character is amiable but reserved, gentleman but flirtatious and is entirely believable. He is someone who travels the world absorbing the essence of cultures while appreciating the conflicts that exist within.

When it comes to narration, the flow of the book is smooth and never falters. The descriptions of lovemaking and Tantra are so beautifully captured that they are nothing but amazingly sensual. The characters get etched on to the mind of the readers long after they have finished the story and placed it on the shelf. This book will satisfy ones' curiosity for eastern culture and religious philosophies.

It’s a nice read but there are a few places where Chris infers that Hinduism is all about spirituality and yoga. It's not the case Mr. Castanga but you surely have redeemed yourself by describing India in its full glory. Bless you for that!

Disclosure: The author provided me with a review copy.

The Guys’ Guy’s Guide To Love: Book Review

2011-12-30T13:33:00.000+05:30

Ok, this has been long due. I received a review copy of Robert Manni's weirdly (but aptly) titled book called The Guys’ Guy’s Guide To Love (GGGLove) a couple of months back but was unable to read it due to piles of other books in the pipeline. Finally I got to read it and found it be as fast moving as the story's setting in NYC.

The story GGGLove is set in New York where the city never sleeps in Madison Avenue. In fact the story is so believable that it could have taken place anywhere in the world.

The book is all about the dating scene where the womanizing Roger and Max sweat it out. The stakes are high and the people are unforgiving in a world of love, sex and power.

GGGLove turns contemporary dating logic on its head by referring that women prefer the traditional type of men than the new-age stud. Now that's some food for thought, isn't it?

And I have no reason to disbelieve the author, given the fact that he speaks from experience. I understand that the young professional women of today may not relate to the struggles their male counterparts face, but they understand their frustration and unhappiness. And this is the reason; they are looking out for the old-fashioned, low risk taking man.

GGGLove presents the story from both the men and women perspectives and provides an insight into the mind of the contemporary women and what they really want.

Robert Manni has done an amazing job with this role reversal fun read. Go read it as it comes from a master.

Disclosure: The author provided me with a review copy.

Copyright (c) Pigtale 2005-2012. Images copyright respective holders.

The Spirit Whisperer: Harbart (Book Review)

2011-12-23T21:31:00.000+05:30

Literary translations are always tricky as it is more of a creative act than just converting one language to another. More than just translation, it is the cultural knowledge that matters. A case in point would be to see "The Mask" with Hindi subtitles. Jim Carrey in one of the scenes says "Smoke Head" and you can't but laugh at what appears in the subtitles..."Dhumrapaan". The translator clearly did not understand the word and it's cultural meaning. And this is where many translators falter and display their weaknesses.

Having said that, it's never easy to translate a book without losing any of its original meaning. Some books can merely be translated but others like Harbart need something more like transliteration. When I started reading Harbart, I didn’t know what to review; the story or the translation (I haven't read the original Bengali version of the book). Maybe, I'll do both.

First about the story. At the heart of Nabarun Bhattacharya's Harbart is Herbert Sarkar or Harbart; an orphan who made a living by pretending to be a spirit whisperer. Little did anyone know that it was the ghosts of his own memories that haunted him.

The story opens with Harbart's death or rather suicide. The description of his death is sprinkled with grotesque details and serves as a diving board for the mystery ahead. The rest of the book gives us the back-story leading up to the suicide and the rather "explosive" climax.

The original book was first published in 1993 and using Harbart's character, Nabarun Bhattacharya throws the readers into an environment where almost everything was wrong with Kolkata at that time. In spite of the stench, decay and general apathy of Kolkata, Harbart rises with subtle aspiration of becoming an entity who is far cry from the city that he was a part of.

It was Harbart's first hand experiences with naxalism, death and humiliation that cajoles him to choose a profession that makes him famous. How the nonchalance of his surroundings finally brings about his downfall is something that I'd rather leave the readers of the book to find out. Nabarun Bhattacharya’s style of writing brought a whiff of freshness. The various nuances of imagery, sarcasm and dark humor makes Harbart a delight to read.

Now a word on the translation. Arunava Sinha does an amazing work in bringing forth the dark humor that Harbart is all about. However, he could have done a little more justice. Arunava, I'm sure culturally understood the story but unfortunately, he didn't belong to Harbart's era. The word to word translations of the poems absolutely did not convey their significance.

It's imperative that a translator should reproduce the original author's style but this is not possible all the time. It wouldn’t and cannot be an absolute translation but the approximate should be aimed for. I am a Bengali who cannot read or write his mother tongue and this embarrassed soul says a Big Thank You to Arunava. I need to hand it to Arunava for making non-Bengali readers get access to an amazingly textured story like Harbart. Readers should not miss this unusual piece of Bengali Literature.

This review is a part of the Book Reviews Program at BlogAdda. Participate now to get free books!

The Blogging Affair- Book Review

2011-11-30T14:45:00.001+05:30

I spent the last few days reading The Blogging Affair by Amitabh Manu and I don't really think that it was a total waste of time.

According to the author, "It's not really a murder mystery". He was right as I could guess the murderer very early in the book.

So what is the plot? A lady has been found murdered and the paramour is the prime suspect. The suspect is a weird character who is married and thinks from between his legs (now most men do that, don’t they). And then there is the anonymous blogger who confesses to having murdered the lady.

The story moves forward using 3 points of view; the anonymous blogger, the man who is the suspect and the detectives/cops investigating the murder.

I will not dwell deep into the plot as it’s mostly an open and shut case and doesn't try to rise above the obvious. Barring grammatical mistakes and factual errors (since when did the Road Transport Office start having "Marital Status" on driving licenses?), the plot is pretty average.

The characterizations leave a lot to be desired. Apart from the suspect's one-track mind, nothing comes across that would register on one's mind. The anonymous blogger's digressions into religion, homeopathy, and spiritual enlightenment among others were totally lost on me. They did nothing to add or move the story forward or backward (given that the blogs are in reverse chronological order). All I recall are the persistent headaches that the blogger suffered from.

I would say that the only gripping narrative in the entire book is the one based on the cops. There are some unintentional moments of humor but the author at some places went completely overboard with the "word play".

The editing is a classic example of the importance of a good pair of eyes that would pick out the very obvious flaws. I don’t know if Amitabh engaged an editor or not but it is given that all authors need a second opinion, someone to see the obvious and at the extreme, someone to tell them that things need to be fixed. They need to have an editor with credentials and not just their best friend or wife/husband (unless the best friend or wife/husband is an editor).

All said and done, The Blogging Affair was written in right earnest and with all its flaws, the book makes a good read. It could have been a great read.

Disclosure: The author provided me with a review copy.

Can I Touch You There!

2011-11-18T05:44:00.001+05:30

So, apparently all vehicles are females. I don't know how or who started it but that's the way it is. Maybe, it dates back to the time when men controlled women (it's the exact opposite now) and since cars or other vehicles are also controlled by people, they are referred to as a 'she'.

Or maybe because they purr softly when handled with care, are temperamental when ignored. And if one is willing to splurge, they can look pretty sexy.

So the point I'm trying to make is that all vehicles are female except Maruti Suzuki SX4 which is "definitely male". And no, I am not tolerating a "it's got a hollow tailpipe" joke ; o)

Having made that point, let me take that a little further. In India, all vehicles are lesbians.

It is a well known secret if you have the same amount of free time as I have. So how is it that Indian vehicles are lesbian, you ask?

If you have been in India for as long as I have been, you wouldn't ask the question. The "answer" is at a touching distance from you. When was the last time you took out your vehicle and haven't touched or been touched by someone (another vehicle I mean).

It's such a delight to be on the road with vehicles touching each other, caressing them, purring sweet nothings into each other ears and literally scratching.

So the next time, your vehicle scratches another vehicle or vice-versa, don't be angry. Smile and remember that it’s their way of showing TLC!

Retelling History: Chanakya's Chant (Book Review)

2011-08-04T16:01:00.001+05:30

“There is poison in the fang of the serpent, in the mouth of the fly and in the sting of a scorpion; but the wicked man is saturated with it.”
---Chanakya

Spanish American philosopher and author, George Santayana once said, “A country without a memory is a country of madmen." The recent spate of fiction based on Indian mythology by various authors does just that- retell history. Chanakya figures very prominently in our collective memory but Ashwin Sanghi manages to take Chanakya's story to a whole new level.

Time and again we have realized that the past is never dead. It comes back in one form or another and Chanakya's Chant illustrates this in the most vivid way. The shrewdness and ruthlessness that epitomized the then Chanakya is evident in Gangasagar Mishra of today.

Without giving away the details of the story, it suffices to say that just like Chanakya used his intelligence and shrewdness to install Chandragupta Maurya on the throne, Gangasagar Mishra does the same for Chandini Gupta; only this time the throne is the Prime Minister's chair. What happens between the start of the plan and the destination (and beyond) is what the book is all about.

The highly intelligent Chankakya was one of the most cunning strategists that the world has ever seen. Given his cold and calculating mind, he managed to take revenge of his father's murder, take on Alexander and install Chandragupta on the throne of the Maurya Empire and still found time to write his brilliant Arthasashtra. Gangasagar essays the role of the modern day Chanakya and displays rare ruthlessness and wit to become the kingmaker.

Just like his last book, The Rozabal Line, Ashwin Sanghi creates a common thread between the two stories that run parallely in the book. The amazing storyteller that he is, Ashwin Sanghi manages to weave a complex story using historical events and extrapolating them to present world that is full of manipulation. Mr. Sanghi knows his history well enough to find parallels and presents a well researched story. The voice is confident and the story is compelling. The editing is top notch with right dosage of drama and action. To top it all, there are tongue-in cheek statements on the reason for the Sepoy Mutiny or the "beauty of accounting" amongst other gems.

Chanaky's Chant makes us realize that no price is too high and no life too precious but at some places I felt that the author took it too far. Ashwin's flight of imagination made him write some portions of the book that seem implausible. How was it possible for Gangasagar to carry on bumping off people left right and center without anyone raising any eyebrows or objection? Were the people, law of the land and democracy totally impotent to handle the situation? But all said and done, this page-turner keeps the reader on hook, coaxing them to reach the last page.

I am not much into books that run into pages upwards of 400 but this is one of the few books that I wanted to go on and on. Chanaky's Chant is an awesome amalgamation of historical reality and contemporary fiction. If nothing else, these kinds of books will tempt the present generation to go and read the original works around Indian mythology. I have always felt that when it comes to Indian mythology, the more we scratch the surface, the more wonderful stories emerge from them.

This review is a part of the Book Reviews Program at BlogAdda. Participate now to get free books!

The New Prime Time: The 6pm Slot (Book Review)

2011-07-11T18:40:00.005+05:30

Television has long stopped being interested in the business of communication. All it does is deliver audiences to advertisers. TRP is the king- people are just merchandise.

One can't blame television entirely though. The fact that newspapers have a page two (and television doesn't) makes it all the more necessary for television to showcase even mundane news by airbrushing them to give them the "shock value".

The 6pm Slot by Naomi Datta is what television is all about today. The cover of The 6pm Slot belies its contents. It is in no way a chic-lit. It is a serious novel delving into a serious issue. Naomi Datta's book manages to portray the nitty-gritty of television the way it presently is. The author's bio page tells that Naomi is a television producer, presenter and film writer all rolled into one. I am not surprised as a book like The 6pm Slot can only be written by an "insider". This book throws the reader into a world full of dirty tricks, titillation and manipulation that is so synonymous with the television industry.

The book has a chequered list of characters of myriad shades. Right from the naive producer (Tania) to the self- appointed messiah of "newsdom" (and everyone in between), Naomi has nailed it. The 6pm Slot takes us through Tania's journey who has been asked to work on a show involving an agony aunt (a babe actually). The brief is clear; make 6pm the new prime time. All that Tania has is a hot host and her brilliantly colorful English. But there is a problem: the panning of camera on various bronzed titillating body parts and nondescript problems of adolescents are not enough to hook the nation.

With the TRP sword hanging on Tania's head, she gives in to creating imaginary callers and their problems. One such brilliantly executed hoax spirals out of control when the nation almost exhausts its candle supply by "performing" the mandatory night vigil/march. How Tania uses her mental faculties to survive the fiasco is what the book is about. I would say that the buildup to the crux of the story is a little too long drawn. The ending is swift and calculated as if the author got fed up and wanted to finish off the story.

Not all creations of God are equal and it’s the same with the characters in this book. Some like Rahul and Harish are carved out intricately. Their descriptions are so vivid that you can almost see them if you close your eyes. Most of the other characters are not so fortunate. It would have been great if Naomi had invested in chalking out the other characters in detail to give a lasting impression.

In terms of language, it can safely be called the Delhi Belly of Indian literature. No, seriously, the language is easy and free-flowing and has dark humor. Naomi manages to explore a very real world of television with real issues in the most lucid manner.

The debut effort of Naomi is commendable as she gets most of the story-telling part right without digressing much. The ending mentions that, "It just keeps coming back in circles" and we wish that Naomi comes back with another one of her "insider" stories. The 7pm Slot! Anyone?

This review is a part of the Book Reviews Program at BlogAdda. Participate now to get free books!

Insinuating Insults

2011-07-04T17:06:00.026+05:30

When was the last time you wanted to verbally blast someone but were at a loss of words? If the answer is "last friday", "yesterday" or "now", then there is just the book for you. In fact it has been around for half a century now. Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you, the ultimate in pot-shots, comebacks, insulting retorts and more; 2000 Insults for All Occasions by Louis A. Safian.

This book also happens to be the oldest book in my personal library. The book was first printed in 1965 by Citadel Press and is as relevant today as it was the day metal press plates were made for the offset printing. I have a 1968 edition of the book.

I don't really recall where I got this book from but it's one of my prized possessions. This book is guaranteed to generate some laughs with its witty insults that are divided into sections like Nudists, Golddiggers, Juvenile Delinquents, Dumbbells, Husbands etc.

The audacious purpose of this compilation is to give you the opportunity of (at the drop of a hat and gag) shredding someone's self-respect with sharp swings of hard and negative truths. This book is a must for keeping your insult arsenal well stocked for expressing yourselves in situations that demand critical use of your verbal faculties.

Sample this in the "Playgirl" section:

When the little bell on her typewriter rings, she thinks it means a coffee break.

The above might be a little outdated (typewriters, anyone?) but you get the picture, right!

Spiderman's uncle told him that with great power comes great responsibility and I have realized that the great power of "insults" comes with great responsibility. So use this book responsibly and understand that you may need these comebacks sooner that you ever anticipated.

Book Review of "Zor: Philosophy, Spirituality and Science"

2011-05-27T05:22:00.010+05:30

There are three kinds of books one might have come across: One that you can connect with, one that you cannot connect with and then there is the third kind that is confusingly in between. Zor falls in the third category; Simple, lucid and thought provoking, it travels between familiarity and bizarre.

The story starts on a familiar note of an Investment Fund Manager who has seen it all, only to fall into the black hole of complacency and monotony. Then one day, John Brewster, the Fund Manger, chances upon a Haitian dwarf, Zor who changes everything. The equations that John had in his life go haywire when he starts listening and analyzing what Zor had to say..

The two almost always meet at a bar and discuss things ranging from being happy to being self. Strange explanations provided by Zor makes John change the way he has been thinking and forces him to find happiness and contentment and then almost lose all of it (I won’t let the suspense out).

Conversations with Zor lead John to take stock of his life, marriage and everything in between. The most well developed and also the most underdeveloped character in this book is that of Zor. We don’t really understand what or who is he. Mysterious at times but quite profound and crystal clear, Zor swings from Ch’i, mind, body, spirit to quantum physics, neurons and theory of relativity. It’s like moving very fast between fire and ice; suspicion and belief.

One can understand by reading the book that Zor is just a physical allegory to our perception. Needless to say, it helps questioning our perceptions to break some myths. Simple, interesting and relatable, Zor is a book that questions our basic belief system.

There is not much of a story there in Zor but it has a message that rings loud and clear. Indians who are generally into spirituality would love to relate themselves with what’s in the book. Go read the book: it might not change your life but it will definitely change your outlook.

Buy: Zor: Philosophy, Spirituality, and Science
Author: J.B.
Paperback: 268 pages
Publisher: CreateSpace
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1452895406
ISBN-13: 978-1452895406

Disclosure: The author provided me with a review copy.

Bi(cycle) Winning!

2011-05-21T04:22:00.001+05:30

Following the accusation by Tyler Hamilton on how seven-time Tour de France winner Lance Armstrong used performance-enhancing drugs, there is nothing left to disbelieve. I don't know how murky it will get. I don't know how much vested interest Tyler has in all of this but it surely has dented Armstrong's reputation as someone who could fight a near- fatal disease to come back and score a win over life. In the meantime, I can give you this.

PS: I know that "Livestrong" has a typo but as long as the "IV" is at the right place, you'll get the joke.

World Peacekeeping Outsourced!

2011-05-11T09:51:00.008+05:30

So, the other day I tried to unearth as to how the US did what they claim they did..i.e bump off the Osama chap. And then I chanced upon this piece of conversation (ok, I created this and not chanced upon) and everything fell into place. Click on the image below to enlarge it.

If the enlarged image is still unclear, then right-click on it and save. Then open in any image viewer by setting the desired magnification.

Nameless Suffering!

2011-03-07T12:07:00.001+05:30

So what do you know about the fire that engulfed almost half of Bandra's slum shanties few day’s back?

Yes, it’s called Garib Nagar. What else?

Yes, it's in Mumbai. What else?

Come on! Give me the obvious answer.

Yes! You got it right. Rubina Ali lost her house and her Oscar.

Just look at the news about the fire that was covered by India's leading newspapers. All the headlines scream that Rubina's house has been gutted in the fire and that the Oscar statuette has been lost.

Not one of them goes on to tell the stories of the less fortunate ones. It's sad that the nameless people of the Bandra slum have to shed their tears in solitude while all the reporters hog on what's happening to Rubina.

The Oscar can be replaced; Rubina will surely have another house gifted to her but what about the others who haven't been fortunate to win an Oscar. Spare a thought for the lesser mortals!

Nursing an Eyesore

2011-02-03T14:39:00.000+05:30

The last time I visited Mumbai, I was due for a rude shock. It all started with the apartment complex my brother and parent stay in. I was standing in the basement parking area when I saw one. Then I saw another one. I turned around and scanned to notice a few others. One or two can be coincidental but a full 6+ cars missing their logos was a bit too much to pass off as usual. Yes, Mumbai has become a pioneer of sorts in finding a new way to create a business ecosystem.

Everyday, hundreds of cars have their logos ripped off and then sold in the grey market. Some of these find their way to the showrooms and authorized service centers as well. As far as I knew, these logos were chrome plated (that's why they never lose their shine). I might be wrong as someone told me that they are pure silver coated with chrome. Quite possible!

And it's quite a roaring business as well. A BMW logo sells for Rs 10,000 in the grey market. No wonder teenagers from even well to do families have taken to it (for some extra pocket money). I hear that this fad has caught on in other cities of India as well. Till the police do something about this, we might have to live with an awesome car (like the BMW below) nursing an eyesore of a missing logo.

Need help rehabilitating old students

2011-01-07T20:57:00.001+05:30

Yesterday (6th Jan 2011), the Justice Srikrishna panel's report on Telangana was released to the political stakeholders of Andhra Pradesh. The panel suggested that giving statehood to Telangana was "the second best option." This prompted Osmania University students to restart their agitation in their campus in Hyderabad. Not that these students need an excuse to start stone pelting.

I don't want to comment on the panel's suggestion or recommendations, but I do surely want to know as to what 45-60 year old people are doing studying in the university. Just look at the picture below which was taken by PTI at the Osmania University campus yesterday.

I am sure that the 3 circled people are 45-60 year old "students" doing their 2nd PhD. at the university. Their thesis must be titled "Cogent synthesis of diverse political DNA to reproduce Benjamin Buttonism" or some such thing.

Photo source (slide# 7): http://www.thehindu.com/news/states/andhra-pradesh/article1045713.ece

Down the Wire

2010-12-02T12:55:00.001+05:30

News has it that corporate PR professionals, political party lobbyist/agents and criminals have shifted to a traditional (read archaic) and safe form of communication. This has been the fallout of the recent expose.

In another news, the stocks of Baba Zarda has hit the roof.

Prodigious Indian Survey Scam

2010-11-24T18:02:00.000+05:30

Have you ever been approached by a college going guy with a bunch of photocopied papers asking for your name, age and possibly phone number and email ID? Chances are that you have. You ask the guy what is it for and he would reply, "Sir we are doing a survey for a project." Good enough, but then it strikes you...where are the questions for the survey (not that you are itching to answer inane questions like, "How many times do you scratch..." You get the point).

Ladies and gentlemen, this is the Prodigious Indian Survey Scam (PISS for short). A survey found out that 98.99% of surveys done in India are fake. All that is required for PISS is a valid name and email ID/phone number and the rest of the data can be filled up on the go...just like it is being filled by the guy below. He was sitting in front of my office filling...what else...bunch of surveys, all by himself.

Pati Patni Aur Woh!

2010-11-09T14:31:00.000+05:30

There is a point in everyone's lives when someone comes unannounced and totally takes control. I have sadly reached that point. And this "someone" is colloquially referred to "Woh" in Hindi...as in Pati Patni Aur Woh. Lines have been drawn and my marriage is at its dismal nadir. Books have been destroyed and wooden cabinets pulverized. Wife refuses to stay in the house because of "Woh" and I move around with that "it'll-go-away-on-its-own" look.

But things are not looking great now and it’s about time I put my foot down and complied with wife. "Woh" has to go! My initial reluctance to get "Woh" out of my house was a small story I had written about "Woh's" plight when a little girl tried to kill it.

Ok! Enough with the suspense and stupidity. This "Woh" that has been the reason for my heightened woes is the bloody termite and its family that have taken to making my house theirs. They have eaten books, they have eaten wooden cabinets and they have now started to attack my academic certificates as well. Before the doors fall off their hinges, I took the extreme step of spraying them with the poisonous substance that I had in house. But Baygon failed miserably and the "Woh" came back in millions to seek revenge. I was scared of sitting at a place for more than an hour as I ran the risk of become another Valmiki.

As a last resort, the pest control guys have been called in and they are supposed to do their magic while I would get busy standing in a corner, writing "Woh's" obituary.

Satisfaction Guaranteed?

2010-10-05T17:25:00.000+05:30

[Cross-posted at XIMB Alumni Blog]

By the time my dad had retired from his job, he had clocked close to 40 years in service. As if the number of years weren't intimidating enough, he managed to pass these 40 odd years in a single organization. Now that is awe-inspiring. In the 7-8 years of my professional experience, I have managed to change 4 organizations. If I look at my friends, I see almost the same trend and statistics.

I can understand that things were different 30 years earlier when people held on to their jobs till retirement (for lack of options or other reasons), but what has changed now? Do we jump jobs because we have more options now or are there other reasons for this behavior? At this point, I can only attribute this phenomenon to job satisfaction or the lack of it. Just because we have job satisfaction issues AND there are other options, we change jobs frequently. I know that I might be generalizing but then there are exceptions to anything, right?

That brings me to the issue of employees’ job satisfaction in organizations. According to Wikipedia, "Job satisfaction has been defined as a pleasurable emotional state resulting from the appraisal of one’s job;[1] an affective reaction to one’s job;[2] and an attitude towards one’s job. Weiss (2002) has argued that job satisfaction is an attitude but points out that researchers should clearly distinguish the objects of cognitive evaluation which are affect (emotion), beliefs and behaviors. This definition suggests that we form attitudes towards our jobs by taking into account our feelings, our beliefs, and our behaviors."

I talked to a few friends and colleagues and jotted down their parameters for gauging their job satisfaction. Here are the factors that determine their job satisfaction. These factors have been generalized and some of the sub-factors have been force-fitted into the main categories. They might not be true for everyone but they hold good for the general public. So here I go!

Money

Ok! So, this one figured very highly on everyone’s list. I just cannot buy in your theory if you say that money doesn’t matter. I could be wrong when it comes to all the remaining factors but certainly not this one. In this world of instant gratification, almost everyone dreams of retiring early with lots of money in their kitty. If the remuneration is good, then it affects an employee's performance and the way the job is executed. Apart from being satisfied with what the employee is getting, it should also be important for him/her to compare their compensation within and across industry/industries. Then there also sub-factors like hikes and bonuses which keep the employees happy and content. They should always feel that their efforts are being compensated monetarily with increments at regular intervals.

Work- Life Balance

30 years ago, there was nothing called work-life balance or so I think. It’s a fairly new term and concept which now is an important factor in determining job satisfaction. The hours of work and the commute time determines the time spent by an employee in office, on the road and at home, with his/her family. Spending quality time with family helps an employee get over the fatigue induced by long hours at work.

It has been proved that employees of an organization which provides "work from home" option are more satisfied than the ones who don’t allow. This works out very well with working couples and this freedom is something that compels them to continue with that organization. I don’t know about everyone but many feel that office ergonomics play an important factor in keeping an employee satisfied. If the chairs and cubicle have good ergonomics, then it means one less thing to complain about, right?

Growth

Does your job helps in fostering growth or does it stifle you? The answer to this question is important to decode the job satisfaction puzzle. No one wants their life or career to stagnate. This stagnation is the root cause of dissatisfaction. If an employee feels that he/she is not gaining in terms of learning or skill enhancement, then it would invariably lead to dissatisfaction and mental unrest. Other factors that are related to growth are responsibility and accountability as they boost an employee’s level of interest in the job and make them feel wanted.

Office Culture

Office culture determines whether you wake up and look forward to a day in office or drag yourself to work every day. The people you meet and the way they behave is what office culture is. Office culture of course has to do with HR policies and the inherent genetic build of an organization but it’s the people who make up the culture. Since an employee spends around eight or more hours a day in office, it is very important that office politics, co-workers and superiors are satisfactory.

Job Security

Who doesn’t like stability and security! It is vital to every employee in any organization. The same is true for jobs. If the level of job security goes below a certain threshold, then it affects performance and confidence.

The factors that influence job security are attrition rate, HR policies, economy and industry performance among other things. For example, if the economy is looking up then it means, there are more jobs in the market. This would obviously lead to a feeling of job security even if you are not quitting your organization.

Benefits

I would term any privileges which are non-salary as benefits. These could have financial implications or psychological effect. Benefits like health insurance, perks, reimbursement and vacations play an important factor in terms of job satisfaction. You might have worked for quite a few years in an organization and feel that given your talent and knowledge, you should be eligible for some special privileges.

After jotting down all the above factors, it makes sense to draw up the big picture by putting together the smaller pieces. So here is what I feel influences job satisfaction.

(click on the image above to enlarge)

I just tried to list down the factors that I thought might influence job satisfaction. I might be close or I might not be so close. The Job Satisfaction Index (JSI) changes with industry verticals. The JSI in IT industry is quite different than say in the financial sector. I’ll leave that discussion for some other time.

Grow Young

2010-10-02T22:00:00.001+05:30

How does it feel to see something that you have nurtured for years grow into a beautifully naughty "thing"? Awesome, right? Yes! That "thing" came into my life 4 years back. When I found that "thing", it was tiny, scared, scruffy and angry. Though the fear and dirt have been taken care of, the aggression is still intact. And with the aggression remains unchanged the look in its eyes.

It has grown from a tiny little thing to a healthy fur-ball full of life and love. That "thing" goes by the name of Nemo. This post is to wish my dear cat, Nemo a very Happy Birthday! 4 years and still going strong. May you stay with us for a long long time.

(Nemo Then) (Nemo Now)

“Your birthday is a special time to celebrate the gift of 'you' to the world.”

Hold Your Silence!

2010-09-22T16:46:00.000+05:30

With the impending doom that CWG promises, I can't but feel pity for Shera, the mascot.

Spot On!

2010-08-31T12:57:00.000+05:30

My Publishing Journey (Part-II)

2010-07-29T15:46:00.003+05:30

Part-I of this article is HERE!

My POD Journey

I have a flaw. I don’t have patience. If you want to get your book published by a traditional publisher, learn to have patience. Since I had already waited 7 months for the book to be accepted, I was not too keen to wait anymore. After researching on the subject, I zeroed in on Print on Demand or POD.

Print on demand (POD) as the name suggests is a service wherein a book is not printed until an order has been received and paid for. So, if there is a specific demand, the book would be printed. This ensures that there is no inventory or unsold stock. This also means a fixed cost per copy which is higher than offset printing. In offset printing, the setup cost (i.e. making the print plates) is higher but as the print runs are high, the overall cost comes cheaper than POD.

POD is not without its share of risks, the main being content quality. Anyone with a manuscript, irrespective of its content quality can go for POD and get a book published. If you will, POD is a form of self-publishing minus all the hassles.

In India ISBN (unique book identification number) is given out free. In my case, I could either have got myself an ISBN for my book and published it under my own name or taken help of POD experts. I opted for the latter as it was easier and simpler.

The following are the 2 most reliable POD service providers in India:

Pothi (www.pothi.com)
CinnamonTeal (http://cinnamonteal.dogearsetc.com)

For authors who are outside India or who want to market their book outside India, here are a few options:

Lulu (www.Lulu.com)
TheBookPatch (www.thebookpatch.com)
Xlibris (www.xlibris.com)
Amazon's CreateSpace (https://www.createspace.com)

After talking to Leonard Fernandes of CinnamonTeal, I decided that this Goa based POD service provider was the one I would tie up with. This was in June 2010. My journey of becoming a published author had just started.

The entire process comprised of the following phases:

Signing a standard author contract with the publisher
Getting an ISBN allotted to the book
Getting the cover page designed
Laying out the manuscript for it to be print ready
Printing

Just like traditional publishing, POD service providers ask you to submit your manuscript. You can either edit and proofread your manuscript yourself or engage the POD’s services to do the same. The book cover design comes next and finally the listing. Most POD service providers have their own online bookstore. The listing is free but it comes for a price (more on that later). Once the book gets listed, all one has to do is shop for it online. After the payment is confirmed, the publisher would go ahead and print a copy and ship it.

In my case, the above 5 took less than a month as I had already formatted my manuscript for a 5”x8” book. Priyanka Pereira from CinnamonTeal took real pains to get everything in place.

Show me the money:

The basic services of a POD provider are free. These include, ISBN allotment (in India at least it is) and book submission. Most of the POD service providers do not screen submissions but some do for language and the content. If you want to go beyond the basics (ISBN, printing, binding etc), and add proofreading, editing, formatting, cover design, marketing services, and the like, you will have to purchase these services separately. Now comes the second most trickiest and complicated part of getting a book published (I’ll talk about the No. 1 trickiest part later): Pricing the book.

Let’s discuss the cost price of the book first. I’ll discuss this with an example. Let’s suppose that the book is of 195 pages. At a rate of 60paise per page, the printing cost would come to Rs 117. Now you add the printing cost of the colored cover page and perfect binding, which is Rs 60. He is the lowdown, point wise:

Cost of printing the book: Rs 117
Cost of printing the cover page and binding: Rs 60
Total cost price: Rs 177

So Rs 177 is the cost of 1 copy. Now comes the “author’s cut” or royalty. As an author who thinks that you have delivered your magnum opus, you would obviously want some of the book sales proceeds to come into your pocket. Fair enough! Now here’s the deal. It’s a tradeoff between low royalty (and higher volumes in terms of sale) or high royalty (which might result in low sales volume). I’ll leave it to you to decide how much is too much.

Now comes the price for listing and the commission. Yes you heard me correctly. The online book retailer takes his/her own commission for listing and selling the book. There are 3 options when it comes to retailing your book: the POD service provider’s online bookstore, 3^rd party retailers (e.g. Indiaplaza, Flipkart etc.) and brick and mortar bookstores. Here’s how the pricing would work for the 3 options:

1. If you get your book listed on the POD service provider’s online bookstore, you will have to pay a commission of 20%. After the 20% is deducted you will have to pay for the printing cost of your book. After the printing cost is met, whatever remains will be your (authors) revenue.

Suppose you price the book at Rs. 250, then after deducting the 20% commission the price will be Rs. 200. From this you will have to pay for the printing cost of your book which will be Rs. 200-177. So the author’s cut would be Rs 23.

If you get your book listed on Indiaplaza and Flipkart, you will have to pay a commission of 45% and 40% respectively.
If you want distributors to market your book to brick and mortar bookstores, they will distribute a minimum of 100 copies. These 100 books will have to be printed at the cost of the author. The author will have to offer a discount of 50% on the MRP of each book. Books will be on returnable basis. You can receive a count of your books at any time on request from the POD service provider.

Marketing the Book:

Now let me come to the trickiest (discussing this as promised earlier) part of self-publishing or going the POD way. It's marketing. The downside of self-publishing or using the services of a POD service provider is the absence of marketing backbone. When I mean "absence", I mean it is not free or at the cost of the publisher. In traditional publishing, the publisher pays for the marketing which includes press releases, book launches and author signing. In self-publishing or POD, it comes for a price and this comes out of the author's pocket.

If you have the money, you can go a long way in getting publicity for your book and selling it (provided it's worth reading). If you want free marketing, then you need to be smart. Not that I have sold billion copies and am a pro in this but I’m learning and trying. So here are my two paisa on generating that buzz for you book that will get it sold and fly off the virtual online bookshelf.

Get someone of importance to review your book. Good or bad, at least people will know about your book.
Check and convince a bookstore to stock your book and offer free book reading sessions.
Offer a monthly newsletter that has information about your books in particular and the publishing world in general.
Offer sample chapters of your book for free. You can the first chapter of my book here.
Print personalized business card with your book's details and offer them to anyone interested.
Network socially. This could be offline and online. Use the power of Internet to exploit the marketing buzz creating potential of Facebook, Orkut, Linkedin, Twitter etc. Believe me, doing this will result in creating and increasing the buzz at an exponential rate.
Generate original content on the publishing industry and issues surrounding your book and publish them on your website, blog or ezine sites. You can even write on the aspects of being a published writer similar to this one.
If everything fails and you have the money, hire a PR/marketing firm to publicize your book.

At the end of the day, publicity or no publicity, marketing or no marketing, traditional or self-publishing, it is the quality of your book that will take it far or fall flat on its face. If your book is good, it will find a place in the reader’s bookshelf.

The tools:

We all have only one lifetime to achieve our dreams. If you want to see your book getting published during this lifetime, then you need to manage your time well. With all plot and sub-plot ideas, characters and settings, it is very easy to lose focus on your timelines.

As a first time writer, it is very important to deliberately and systematically measure and keep track of your progress.

There are a number of ways to track your progress. Some may use free tools available online to keep track of your daily word count and some may use spreadsheets. For keeping track of the progress on my first book, I had come up with a spreadsheet which automatically showed whether I was “On Track” or is the project “Delayed”. This spreadsheet might come in handy for any writer and can be downloaded from here (The spreadsheet will open in Google Docs. You need to go to File-> Download as-> Excel). The cells have comments which would make user-input fairly easy.

At the end of the day, I'd say, it’s the journey which matters, not the destination. I suggest you never lose touch with the pleasure of writing. Write what you would like to read. Getting published is just a perk but the satisfaction you'd get by writing a book is something that can only be experienced to believe it.

All the best and wish me luck!

My Publishing Journey (Part-I)

2010-07-29T14:19:00.002+05:30

I have been putting pen to paper since the age of thirteen with various levels of success. Apart from my regular job, I took to freelance writing in 2005. This entailed various odd content related stuff like website content, marketing collateral, brochures etc. In 2005 I decided to seriously write a book. In fact, I have had always wanted to write a novel but it never materialized. Some got abandoned after the title selection and some after a few pages. It took me close to 4 years to write Have a Pleasant Journey, my first book. I started writing Have a Pleasant Journey in 2005 and had to fight distractions like affairs, jobs and marriage (not in that order) to complete it in the latter half of 2009.

Publishing experience:

Now that I look back, the easiest part of the entire exercise was writing the book. Getting it published was a different ballgame altogether.

I had completed the first draft in Oct 2009. I was so tired of getting it finished that I wanted to get it out of my system. I wanted to get this done and move on. But before I could send the manuscript to the publishers, I wanted to check whether this story was worth reading. The easiest way was to give a printed copy each to my wife and a friend for reading it. I told them not to pay attention to grammar and/or typos. I wish I had not given them that brief. After I got their feedback, I started off with the editing. There was a problem with this though. I was so acclimatized with what I had written over the years that I was overlooking all the mistakes.

I should have edited, re-written, re-edited and re-written some more before I submitted the manuscript to publishers and literary agencies. Not that my chances of getting published were affected by the substandard language (I had read bad books in terms of language and grammar making their presence felt in bookstores), I just wanted to deliver a book which was in proper English. How difficult could that be, you ask?

Well, quite difficult if you ask me.

I found out that it is very difficult to write a book without making any mistakes and even more difficult to find those out alone. The typos that creep in during the writing process are always very difficult to find by the author. My suggestion would be to take help from people who know their English. In the 8 rounds of editing that my book went through, I managed to find hundreds of mistakes. This continued till the time it finally went into print.

I was so excited at having completed the manuscript that I sent it out to all publishing houses after a couple of rounds of cursory editing. I later realized that the manuscript had huge holes in the plot interspersed with in-your-face grammatical and typographical errors. It was no surprise that the manuscript was rejected by many. If I read the book again after a year or so, I am sure to find a few hundred more mistakes. That’s the power of editing and re-editing.

After giving up on finding mistakes, I chose to go for professional help. Just as I was about to send out the manuscript to a professional copy-editor, a publishing house showed interest and I dropped the editing idea. Bad choice, I’d say.

The publishing contract never materialized and I was left with my mistake-ridden manuscript. I went back to the MS Word document and read it word by word till I was convinced that I had pulled up every single word, sentence and punctuation mark that was guilty of making the book a badly-written one. I was happy with the result but alas it was too late. I had already sent out the “badly-written” book to the publishers.

Pursuing traditional publishers and literary agencies was quite interesting though. I started off by creating 4 documents:

A proposal or covering letter
A sample chapter document (1/3/5 chapter/s sample, based on specific publisher’s requirements)
A synopsis of the story
Author bio

After the book proposal along with the sample chapters and synopsis are sent, you wait. Yes, wait till you lose patience. It normally takes around 4-6 weeks for the publishers to get back with a response: positive or negative. If it is a direct rejection, you move on but if they show interest, don’t be too excited. You are not there yet.

If the publisher likes your synopsis and sample chapters, they might ask for the entire manuscript. The manuscript evaluation might take between 6 weeks to 6 months since a publishing house receives hundreds of proposals every day.

I started sending out the above documents to publishing houses and literary agencies. All this happened a month after I had completed the manuscript and 2 rounds of editing. I waited with bated breath for a response from any one of them.

The very first response came from a renowned Indian literary agency. The lady mentioned in her email that they had a first reading and appraisal fee depending on the word count of my manuscript which would give me a detailed feedback by the team of within eight weeks. She further mentioned that paying didn’t ensure the team accepting my work for representation. The reading fee came to 10K.

Nice start, I said to myself.

Then a call came from a publishing house. He said that they were willing to publish my book at a flat fee of 35K which included 20 free copies. I asked him whether those 20 copies would be the only ones in circulation. He said something profound that involved dreams, 20 copies and 35K in a single sentence. I still haven’t understood what he said. I never heard from him again.

Next came the rejections. They were short, sweet and invariably ended with wishes for my book finding another home. I was okay with rejections as they gave me a feeling of closure unlike some publishers who just wanted me to hang onto the edge. These were the ones who made me wait a week at a time till I lost all hope and patience. This is the status of my proposal accepted/rejected/awaiting status as it stands now:

Proposals Sent	Status
Hachette Books	Rejected
Rupa Publishers	Rejected
Atlantic Books	Rejected
Leadstart Publishers	Awaited
Roli Books	Awaited
Gyaana Books	Rejected
Indialog Publishers	Awaited
Vision Books	Awaited
Srishti Publishers	Awaited
Prakash Books	Awaited
Random House	Rejected
Niyogi Books	Awaited
Tranquebar Books	Awaited
Expression Publishers	Rejected
Dronequill Books	Awaited

The Part-II of this articles is HERE!