Pippa World

Stake Conference? You what?

noreply@blogger.com (Pippa W) — Sun, 19 May 2013 05:00:00 +0000

I realised this morning that even though I had mentioned Stake Conference in my post You Can't Say No, and said that this was an LDS thing that only LDS people would understand that my non LDS friends are going to want more information about what it is exactly.... so this is my explanation.

Firstly to make things easier, I belong to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints and from now on I'll use the initials LDS. I'm a Christian, I read the Bible and The Book of Mormon and I believe that we have a living Prophet. I converted when I was 18 (I might have been 17, I can't quite remember as I've had two children since then and lost half my brain cells) and I like Chocolate... oh wait, that is nothing to do with my religion!

So I go to Church in a Ward, this is basically a boundary to define the area and is really just another word for a parish. There are smaller congregations, and these are called branches, but I've never belonged to one! The Ward is presided over by the Bishop and his two Counsellors and we call this the Bishopric.

Local Wards are grouped together into Stakes, and these are presided over by the Stake Presidency, we have the Stake President and his two Counsellors and there is also a Twelve member Council called the High Council, but I actually don't know a lot about that or them. I'll give myself some homework and find out about it if anyone wants.

Above this we have Areas, which are where Stakes are grouped together and they have leaders too, but I doubt I'll be talking about those in the near future, so I'll explain those if I ever talk about them!

So every six months or so we have what we call Conferences. We have BIG ones where the whole Church across the World will listen to talks by our leaders and we call them General Conference. We have ones in our Ward, which funny enough are called Ward Conference and the talks are given by the Stake Leaders and then we have ones in our Stake too.

These are called Stake Conference and is the reason I was in so much of a tiz, was I'd been asked to talk in our Stake Conference this weekend. The talks in Stake Conference are generally from the Stake Presidency and Stake members (that's me) that have been called upon by the Stake Presidency to speak on a topic assigned to them.

My talk last night went well, I might type it up and add it as a blog post here, but I think that you get enough of my random natterings as it is ;)

So there you go, a basic grounding in phrases I drop as if they are totally normal (well they are to me!). If in the future I start talking Church phrases that you don't know just let me know and I'll explain or try to and find someone much more qualified to answer if I can't.

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What's At The End Of The Rainbow?

noreply@blogger.com (Pippa W) — Fri, 17 May 2013 09:30:00 +0000

I was thinking last night on the drive home from the Theatre about the end of the rainbow. For Beverly and Sue and Angela, I'm pretty sure that they thought that marriage was the end of the rainbow for them and then when they got there, they discovered that it wasn't all happy ever after after all (Sue got a divorce, Angela was treated like a well, a woman in the seventies and Beverly was pretty evil really).

So what is the end of my rainbow?

At the moment losing the weight is my goal, so being the "right" weight for me is the end of my rainbow and I'm not sure what I'm expecting.

Am I expecting that as soon as I lose all the weight I will magically be happy?

Am I expecting that as soon as I lose all the weight I will magically be pretty?

Am I expecting that as soon as I lose all the weight I will magically be proud of my body?

Am I expecting that as soon as I lose all the weight I will magically be where I want to be in my life?

I don't really have the answer to what I'm expecting. I know that I'm not going to step on the Scales and as I step off a magical pulse will cover the world and all the problems I think are in my life be made better, but I'm not so sure that I full understand that in my heart.

I guess once I reach the end of the rainbow, I'll have to take it one step at a time.

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You Can't Say No

noreply@blogger.com (Pippa W) — Wed, 15 May 2013 22:04:00 +0000

If you aren't a Latter Day Saint, then a lot of the phrases or things that I talk about might not make a lot of sense and this is one of those posts.

Earlier today, a member of the Stake Presidency gave me a call. We chatted for a few minutes about having missed each other at Ward Conference a couple of weeks back, and how we would catch up at Stake Conference this weekend when he dropped a bomb on me. He asked me to give a talk at Stake Conference, which at the time of asking was just three days away.

I accepted the talk, I really don't know why. And then I started to panic. Giving a talk to the whole of the Stake? That's worrying for me. I talk to you easily enough, but that's because you are all tiny people who live in my computer and who are more worried about if I put an apostrophe in the wrong place rather than what I'm actually writing about.

The members of the Church who will be at Stake Conference will want to listen to what I have to say. They won't care if my notes that I'm reading from are spelled correctly, they will care if I'm talking with the Spirit.

I've prayed and prayed and prayed. And I've had the inspiration that I need to approach this like I would a blog post. I need to write what I feel and pretend that I am talking to you... I'll let you know how it goes after my talk on Saturday evening.

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Do you ever hold on to a secret?

noreply@blogger.com (Pippa W) — Wed, 15 May 2013 09:30:00 +0000

I have a secret, which I'm going to share because it isn't a "real" secret, it's just a thought that I like to keep to myself and when I'm feeling down or lonely or just want a few minutes to myself, I tell myself that secret and bask in the warmth that I get from knowing something special is going to happen.

It's selfish really. I know this because when I shared my secret with some friends they were so pleased for me and excited and happy and joyous and every other word you can think of, that if your friend told you some great news you'd squee out until you were spent.

There were plans made, and hugs given and messages exchanged and offers of support given and phone calls placed and grins all over the place. I do believe there were even a few prayers of thanks and love and praise.

Now, thinking back over the three groups of friends that I've told I can see the love and support that they unconditionally offer me and why they all reacted the way they did.

I can understand why they are so excited, it's the same reason I'm excited.

I know why there were tears, it's why I'm crying right now.

And so I'm sharing this secret with you, it won't make sense to a lot of you but to those in the know it will.

I'm going to the Temple.

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It's just like Crack

noreply@blogger.com (Pippa W) — Mon, 13 May 2013 09:23:00 +0000

There are some phrases recovering over weight people, like me, hate to hear. Phrases like;

"I lost 7lbs in one week on this diet"

"I heard that Celebrities use this diet to lose up to a stone in a week!".

Phrases like that are like crack to us.

We're working hard to lose weight at a sustainable and sensible rate (roughly 2lb a week, but it can be more depending on how much weight we have to lose) and hearing that there is a new diet on the market that will help us lose a stupid amount of weight and quickly, immediately makes us want to jump on that diet.

We can't help it. We know in our hearts and heads that slow and steady wins the race, and that it is far more sensible to work at the weight loss, so that we understand how to maintain our weight when we eventually reach our goal, but getting to our goal a little quicker? Who wouldn't want that?

And so we plod on, wondering why other people can jump on a diet and lose so much weight in one week and we're stuck here losing it slowly.

And eventually we're get to our goal, and we'll be ready for the new challenges that lay ahead.

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My name is Dan Jon Jr

noreply@blogger.com (Pippa W) — Wed, 08 May 2013 09:30:00 +0000

Over on A Mothers Rambling's I call the children by nicknames. To start with, it was because I wanted a level of security, if a stranger didn't know my Children's real name then they couldn't convince them that they knew them. And knowing that if I google myself I get some really dodgy stories, I wanted the children to have some protection of a future boss googling them and finding out about the time that they ran naked through the garden (actually that was childhood me) or snogged a boy in the cloakroom at School (again me).

Gradually the nicknames became used more often. If I was in a crowded place and I quickly needed my children's attention then their blog names get their attention quicker than shouting their quite common, given name.

Their nicknames became their second names, used almost as often as their real names.

I didn't think that it really effected them to be honest and then Big Boy started making videos of himself playing Minecraft. And at the start of every video he introduced himself to his viewing public;

"Hi! This is Dan Jon Jr. here..."

Who the heck is Dan Jon Jr? Who is Dan Jon Sr for that matter! We don't know anyone with those names, we don't even know a junior! And yet that is how he introduces himself.

Whilst I would quite like to know where the inspiration for this name came from, I'm not that worried about this alternative identity. He's introducing himself with a secret identity, because that is what he thinks you do on the internet. Why he chose these names, I don't really know but they are his. They are his identity, his chosen way to present himself to the world and I'm glad that at nearly five he's sure enough in himself to decide that he knows who he is.

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What would I do if I had no internet?

noreply@blogger.com (Pippa W) — Mon, 06 May 2013 10:00:00 +0000

I'm not saying that I'm an internet addict, but I think I'm pretty close... So what would I do if I had no internet?

I'd clean the house from top to bottom.
I'd go to the gym or for a walk or a bike ride.
I'd go to my friends and Neighbours houses to chat.
I'd bake cakes, cakes and more cakes.
I'd cook every meal from scratch.
I'd read.
I'd write.
I'd not put things off.

I'd be bored
I'd be alone for most of the day.
I'd be lonely.
I'd be fatter than I am now
I'd be frustrated.
I'd be less educated.
I'd be more in my head.
I'd find new ways to procrastinate.

I guess that even though the internet can be the thorn in my side, that it brings as much as takes away from my life.

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I'm not fat but you are

noreply@blogger.com (Pippa W) — Sat, 04 May 2013 10:00:00 +0000

I thought that I was setting a good example.

I thought that by showing the Children how to eat right, how to exercise and how to not get to the point where I am (overweight) that they were going to live happy and healthy lives. Diabetes of course screwed that up for Big Boy in part, but it turns out that I have too.

"I'm not fat but you are" is something said to me on a daily basis by Big Boy. Big Boy has understood what I've been saying and instead of understanding how it applies to me and instead of taking it as a warning and having an understanding of why I'm overweight and how we can stop me from being over weight and how we can prevent him and his Sister from becoming over weight he sees it as something that he can use as an insult.

And yet he doesn't understand that to me it is an insult.

I mean, yes he is 100% right. I am fat and he isn't. He is just making a statement of fact as he sees it (and there is nothing like a child to make a statement of fact that cuts straight to the heart of the matter) but I still see it as an insult as I'm sure all of the people he might say it to will.

I've created a problem and I don't know how to solve it.

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Happy birthday me

noreply@blogger.com (Pippa W) — Thu, 02 May 2013 05:00:00 +0000

So, it's my birthday.

For the last couple of years I've pretended that I'm bothered that I'm growing older. I've joked about being younger than I am and even friends who were in the same School year as me, joined in with the joke.

But it doesn't bother me.

I'm not worried that I've got a few grey hairs (apparently as I can't see any) or that I'm closer to my death than I am my birth.

I have a brilliant life. I have a wonderful family. I have faith. I have (for the most part) my health. I have friends and later on today I will have cake.

And yet I still pretend.

So if you see me on Facebook or Twitter today telling you that I'm 28 or there about, then tell me I don't look a day over twenty. Tell me Happy Birthday. Just join me with the joke.

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Six Ways To Lose A Stone

noreply@blogger.com (Pippa W) — Tue, 30 Apr 2013 13:54:00 +0000

When Flyfour and I were engaged we decided that we needed to lose weight. We decided that what we really needed to do was to diet together because that way we would have the support that we needed in the form of each other and at this point we were always eating together anyway. Somehow we ended up deciding the diet we wanted to follow was the "Six Ways to Lose a Stone in Six Weeks", we brought the book and Judith Wills (the author) became our guru.

There are six sets of questions at the start of the book, that help you work out what diet would be best for you to follow. The six diets are;

The Detox and Energise Plan
The Healthy Fast Food Plan
The Sweet-tooth Plan
The Meat-free Plan
The Business Plan
The Family Plan

The first time we answered the questions, there were a two different diets that we could follow. The Healthy Fast Food plan and the Sweet-tooth plan, but as Flyfour hasn't a sweet tooth as big as mine we decided to follow the Healthy Fast Food Plan. Which meant we got to eat McDonalds. We like McDonalds.

The diet was brilliant. We both lost just over a stone in the six weeks, just as the book said we might.

There were unlimited foods that we could eat if we wanted to, there are recipes which were great tasting and easy to follow. There are stories that we could draw inspiration from and exercise suggestions which mean it was a lot easier to work out how to burn off the extra 250 calories a day that the diets suggest.

And after the diet finished we kept the book on the shelf, so that we could use it again if we needed to. And we did a few times, not just for some of the foods that we discovered we like, but for following the plan again from time to time.

And then last week when I weighed myself and realised that I had put back on most of the weight I had lost I knew that I had to get the book out again. So I told Flyfour that we were on a diet. This time I chose the Family plan as the base, but because of our unique circumstances and my knowledge of the book from past uses I've picked a few recipes from all the plans (it's allowed!).

We've been on the diet since Saturday, and apart from an issue with the Aubergine and Lentil Curry last night (Big Boy didn't want to eat it and there is way more than four servings in the amount I made more like ten, but I followed the recipe straight!) nobody has noticed anything different from what we normally eat.

I've been keeping note of what I'm eating on myfitnesspal (feel free to add me as a friend) and I'm seeing a difference already in my clothes, although I'm not going to weigh myself until the six weeks are up.

So the next few weeks (and no doubt several posts) will be about the diet and my fitness and I'm hoping that once the six weeks are up I can go on it again and again and again, (I mean I have ten stone to lose so I could basically live on this for a year and be within a stone of my goal weight) but I'm not thinking about that for now.

Right now I'm thinking about the next six weeks and one stone and that's it.

I think that maybe, just maybe that might be the key to my success.

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Back to the beginning

noreply@blogger.com (Pippa W) — Tue, 30 Apr 2013 12:50:00 +0000

I've put weight on.

I have brilliant will power. I mean seriously, if I say to myself I'm not going to do something then I don't do it. Take Coffee and Alcohol as an example. When I changed my religion and became a member of The Church Of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints I stopped drinking Coffee and Alcohol without a second thought. I stopped eating ice cream because I knew it was a weakness of mine and when I was about sixteen my Mum says that I stopped eating crisps and chocolate although I'm pretty sure I blocked that one out of my memory.

It's not that I get bored. I mean how can anyone get bored eating a wide range of fruit and veggies? I love Salad and there are hundreds of ways to eat and prepare it and I've talked to a nutritionist so often I know that the meals that I prepare are balanced and within the right calorific intake for the family.

So it's not boredom, it's not lack of will power, it's more like I get comfortable.

I forget that I need to exercise more and eat less. I forget that what goes in has to be used by my body or I put on weight and it's not even just a little bit of weight. It's normally what I lost and then some.

So I'm back at the beginning of my losing weight journey.

This time I know that I shouldn't throw myself in to exercise as much as I did, because if I do I can't keep it up and will punish myself. This time I'm stronger and more able to understand not only my voices (in my head) but also my body, my diet and my own pace.

I know that this time I'm not going to lose all the weight magically overnight, I mean I knew it before but I was still hoping, this time I need to do a lot of work, and I know it.

So this time I'm ready for it.

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Chantenay Carrot Snack Packs

noreply@blogger.com (Pippa W) — Fri, 26 Apr 2013 05:00:00 +0000

Carrots are one of my most favourite vegetables. I'll eat them steamed, boiled, roasted, raw, grated, dipped or in cakes and muffins, sliced in sandwiches... basically I'll eat them any which way. So when I was asked if I wanted to go and try some new snack pack carrots I said No. Why, would I want to go and try a sliced carrot in London when I can eat a sliced carrot in my kitchen? Then the guys at Chantenay Carrots asked if I'd want to try some at home, and I never say no to a free carrot.

The information I had about the Chantenay Carrot Snack Packs said that the carrots are;

"... neatly packaged fresh sliced carrots created the "Chantenay way"... our carrots are already small we don't need to cut them into vegetable shapes or dip our carrots into chemical solutions to keep them fresh. They are naturally small, sweet and very crunchy."

I thought that this meant they were going to be little baby like carrots, but no the carrots are sliced carrots just short, perfectly formed, carrots. I had some for a mid morning snack and they were lovely and crunchy and perfect for me to munch on whilst I was busy hanging out the washing.

The packs are for sale in Morrisons from the 6th May for 85p and I've been reliably informed that they come with a little dipping pot of Hummus too. It's an easy way to get one of your five a day and I think quite a good one the go snack.

I was sent three packs of the Carrots, but no Hummus. So I made my own. YUM!

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Some People

noreply@blogger.com (Pippa W) — Mon, 22 Apr 2013 12:39:00 +0000

I think that I've always known that some people will never change.

I was lucky, I changed. I saw that my selfish ways were not the way I wanted to live. I saw that the childish reactions I had were not the ways I wanted to react. I realised that I wanted to put other people first, I knew that there was a better way to live.

As I said though, some people never change.

Some people remain the same through out their lives, not realising the destruction that they leave in their wake. They think that because the strategy has worked in their past and they survived unscathed that it is the right strategy.

And the people that don't survive their wrath? The people that they cut down because they grow taller and straighter than the rest? Well, they may be cut down but they'll grow back.

And next time, they'll be stronger because they will change, they will adapt.

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I should have known

noreply@blogger.com (Pippa W) — Wed, 17 Apr 2013 07:00:00 +0000

When you put your head above the parapet someone will notice you. Even if you weren't expressing an opinion and were merely looking up to see what was around, someone will notice you.

Then they will notice your talents.

And they will notice that you aren't using your talents in ways which you could so easily be using them.

You'll be encouraged to use your talents, and you'll end up doing something which you never intended to do.

You might find that you enjoy it. Then again you might not.

I should have known not to raise my head above the parapet.

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My thoughts are with Boston

noreply@blogger.com (Pippa W) — Mon, 15 Apr 2013 22:07:00 +0000

Half my life ago, my Dad was a runner. Not just any kind of runner though, he ran marathons. I can't quite remember how he did it, but he won a place in the Boston Marathon thanks to some Magazine but the weekend that it was on happened to coincide with the first week that my American Exchange Student was going to be with us and so he declined the prize. Thanks in part to him and my natural love of running I've always looked out for news about Marathons, determined that one day I'll run the London marathon and the Boston like my Dad should have.

And when my husband came home from his bike ride this evening telling me there was some terrible news I knew it was related to the Boston Marathon. Flyfour told me enough of the news that I wouldn't have to go and watch the news, or read it on Twitter because he knew that if I did I'd break down and cry.

And so this evening I've prayed and I'll continue to pray as it is all I can offer.

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Parenting Today

noreply@blogger.com (Pippa W) — Tue, 09 Apr 2013 05:00:00 +0000

Watching the Children play together this past half term has made me think about how I would cope as a Stay at Home Mum in previous decades. How would I cope if I had been bringing up my Children in the 90's? The 80's? The 70's? The 60's?

I'm sure that I would have been a much more different person to the one I am now. The slight and subtle cultural changes that mould us all in ways we can't possibly imagine, would have made me a different me. I don't think I would swear as much as I do, I doubt I would be as overweight I wouldn't have as many friends from different cultures as I do and I wouldn't class men as some of my best and closest friends. Would I have a different religion? Would I have friends who were different religions? Would any of my friends not go to Church?

I guess that these are questions that I will never really know the answer to.

My Mum was always there, but I'm not sure what she did exactly. I mean I know she did the household chores and cooked the meals, but did she turn off between 9am and 3pm whilst I was at School? Did she sit and watch daytime TV? Did she have friends that she would go and see? Did she go back to bed or was there something else other than me that filled her days?

My childhood was so different to my own Children's.

I was allowed to play on the back field without my Mum watching my every move. I was allowed to ride my bike around the alleyways of the estate on a Sunday morning before my parents woke up. I was allowed to walk to the local park alone, even though it meant crossing a road.

It wasn't that my parents didn't care, just the norm back then was for Children to have more freedom than they do now. I was taught stranger danger of course, but not as fanatically as I teach my own children now.

I don't think my parents had to worry about how much time I spent watching cartoons on TV, as back then Children's TV wasn't on all day every day. They didn't have to worry about me using electronic devices, as those that I did have weren't like the ones of today.

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If you were on a Desert Island...

noreply@blogger.com (Pippa W) — Mon, 08 Apr 2013 05:00:00 +0000

As I was falling asleep last night I started to play the Desert Island game. You know the one, you're stuck on a desert island and you are allowed to take three things with you so what would you take?

I thought for a little bit about how I would take some kind of Solar powered Satellite and a PC, as that way I could have access to the internet, VOIP telephone calls and possibly some TV.

I thought about how it would be handy to take sunscreen.

I thought how it would be sensible to take some medical supplies and possibly my own private Doctor or Surgeon.

I thought it might be clever to take some battery operated power tools.

I thought it might be wise to take a couple of different outfits, or at least cloth that I could turn into clothes as my weaving isn't that great and I'm sure after a few weeks on the island I would lose weight.

I thought it would be nice to take some books to while away the hours that I wasn't hunting and gathering food or building myself a shelter.

I thought about taking a Chef who could create wonderful dishes from the plentiful fruits and vegetables growing on the island.

I thought how I might like my family to come.

I thought about how I'd like music, or something I could make music on.

I thought about how I'd quite like a comfortable bed and pillow.

And just as I was falling asleep I jolted myself awake with a realisation of how I would actually only need one thing to take with me.

A BOAT!

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The question of the day

noreply@blogger.com (Pippa W) — Sun, 07 Apr 2013 05:00:00 +0000

Most days I ask a question on my Facebook profile, or on Twitter and sometimes even on Google+. I start of explaining what I plan to do that day, or what I'm planning on thinking about or if it is the evening what I did think about that day and then the question. It seems very non-sequitur, but there is a method to my particular brand of madness. I don't think that anyone has ever worked out the link between what I've been thinking about and my questions, although one person did get close once.

The reason I ask the questions has been much speculated about; Am I selling the answers to a Market Research Company (wish I had thought of that one I'd be rich!), am I trying to make my own life more interesting by stealing someone else's identity (see This isn't to go on Facebook for the answer to that one) but the answer is a lot more simple. I like to know what other people are thinking, what is important to them, what they want out of life and their answers reveal this. It helps me understand what is important to me, what I want out of life and to understand what I have been trying to articulate.

I hardly ever answer my own questions (something that I know infuriates other people!) because I don't have an answer. I don't have a favourite biscuit, or word or place. I don't know when I was my happiest or what my least favourite flavour is. I have simply never sat down to think about these things, and I think for the most part the people that answer the questions I pose have never really thought about their answers and what they mean either.

I hope that by answering my questions that those people understand themselves a little bit better, understand their wants, needs and desires more clearly and I'm not sure I'm ready for my brain to go there.

Instead my brain works ten to the dozen wondering how man found out that they could eat sunflower seeds, or how bus routes are worked out, or why people are sometimes so short sighted they can't see what is right in front of them. My brain wakes me up in the middle of the night to work out how many calories would be burnt if I walked all day and where I would end up if it was a straight line. It gets me to think about what would happen if I were to rule the world, or if tomorrow we found out that trees could talk, or if the person born to create the cure to a disease was never given the encouragement to do what others thought impossible. My brain thinks about the raisins I ate, the Scriptures I read, the prayers I whispered and the people I love.

And sometimes, just sometimes it shuts up long enough that I can go to sleep.

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I'm not depressed!

noreply@blogger.com (Pippa W) — Sat, 06 Apr 2013 05:00:00 +0000

I realised a lot of my blog posts make me seemed a bit depressed, which isn't the case, it's just that the random thoughts I've been letting out have been the depressing ones. I guess if I didn't let them out then I might be depressed but inside my head it is still warm and nice and random.

I'm still thinking about rainbows and puppies and zoning out in Church. I'm still thinking about cakes and icing and how to change car light bulbs. I'm still thinking about the ironing, firing a gun and listening to the voices in my head. I'm still thinking about Candy Crush and the best way to shave a cat should I ever have to and what I would do if trapped in a room with no internet.

So I promise that my next few blog posts will be much more positive and smiley, or my name isn't Dan Jon Jr.

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The choices you didn't make

noreply@blogger.com (Pippa W) — Fri, 05 Apr 2013 05:00:00 +0000

How long can you grieve the life that you thought that you were going to live?

Do you have to snap out of it in a day, a week, a month, a year? Can you grieve for the loss of the life you were going to live forever?

Plans change. People change. Life sometimes throws you a curve ball that knocks the stuffing out of you. And yet we soldier on. We keep pushing ourselves forward, living life, making plans for a life that we hope to live until the plans change again. Until the people in the plans change. Until a new curve ball comes in and knocks you off course again.

I get that. I know that the only thing you can plan for in life is that you can't plan for life.

And yet I'm still sad.

I'm sad that my Grandad died before he met my husband and my children.

I'm sad that my Gran died before I was ready for her to go.

I'm sad that my parents divorced.

I'm sad that my son is a Type 1 Diabetic.

I'm sad that I'm not leading the life I thought that I was going to lead.

And yet I'm happy.

I live a great life, one that I never planned for, but I'm living happily anyway.

I've learnt things I never thought I would.

I've grown in ways I didn't know I could. Or needed to.

I don't think it is wrong to grieve the life that you thought you were going to lead. I don't think it is wrong to fantasise about how your life may have turned out if you made a different choice here or there.

I just don't know how long it should be before you stop thinking about the choices you didn't make or if you ever do.

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Breaking Habits

noreply@blogger.com (Pippa W) — Thu, 04 Apr 2013 05:00:00 +0000

When I was younger I drank Coffee. Not just any Coffee though, double strength Coffee and at least six large mugs a day. I wasn't LDS then, so it wasn't something which broke the Word of Wisdom which I try to follow now and the Coffee was something I really enjoyed.

I started getting migraines, really, really, bad migraines and we (my Doctor and I) put them down to the coffee consumption. So I gave up the coffee. I don't remember getting withdrawal symptoms, although I do remember not really caring that I no longer had coffee as my go to drink and my migraines improved, to the point where I didn't have them any more.

I was thinking about this earlier, because I was wondering why I can't do that now. I'm not addicted to Coffee any more, but I have plenty of other addictions that are harming me.

Why can't I just give up eating Chocolate?

Why can't I just stop eating when I'm not hungry?

Why can't I just give up eating portions which are too big?

Why can't I just stop these addictions which are harming me every day?

I understand what I'm doing to myself. I'm not stupid, I can read reports and news articles. I can watch TV programmes and understand what the Doctors and Specialists in them are saying. I've seen the disgusting pictures of people who's arteries and organs are filled with fatty deposits and who have eaten their way to an early death. I see what my Son has to go through every day because a part of his body decided that it no longer wanted to work and I know that if I don't solve my obesity that I'm much more likely to develop Type 2 Diabetes, a disease that is preventable unlike the Type 1 he suffers from.

I can see how it applies to me, and yet I'm still not making the changes.

Why? I wish I knew.

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An uphill battle that will never end

noreply@blogger.com (Pippa W) — Thu, 28 Mar 2013 06:00:00 +0000

It's not that I don't want to lose weight.

It's not that I don't know that I need to lose weight.

It's not that I don't enjoy going to the gym, or going for a walk.

It isn't that it's too cold outside.

It isn't that it's raining or snowing.

It isn't because I am lazy.

It's because I'm disheartened.

It's because there is still so far to go.

It's because I'm not seeing the results as quickly as I would like.

It's an uphill battle that will never end.

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This isn't to go on Facebook

noreply@blogger.com (Pippa W) — Wed, 27 Mar 2013 10:52:00 +0000

When you have a blog and your friends and family know about it, there is always a caveat when they tell you something.

"This isn't to go on Facebook or your blog, okay?".

Yeah, because that's what I do. I take your personal life and immediately tell the rest of the world. I'm that callous and immature that I'm going to use your personal life to make my status updates seem more... yeah, I don't know what your personal life is going to do for my status updates.

If I wanted to post real life on my Status updates then I'd post updates about my own life. Oh wait a minute, amongst all the chat about cheese and the other random things I post, I do post about my own life. Sure, I might not post anything as salacious as the news you just told me but that's because I understand what is personal and what isn't.

I understand what I have the right to share and what I don't.

And as for posting it on my blog. I don't know if you've read my blogs, but none of them are about *you*. They are about the things my family get up to, the films we watch, the walks we go on, the food we eat and the randomness that I call my inner thoughts.

Posting the car wreck that is your life story wouldn't do me or my blog any good. I might however take inspiration for the book I'm trying to write.

That's okay right? I mean you didn't tell me I couldn't write a book about it.

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The February Plan

noreply@blogger.com (Pippa W) — Tue, 05 Mar 2013 00:25:00 +0000

All my plans for February got put on hold when I got ill.

I know it wasn't proper ill, and only a cold but I really didn't think sneezing at the gym and coughing up lumps of mucus was something other gym users would want me doing around them. I did try to carry on at home though and this is where I made my first big mistake. Instead of letting my body rest and heal itself I endangered myself by letting my body get so run down that every bug going let itself in to party in some part of my body.

For February I had three sinus infections, a chest cold, two head colds, an ear infection resulting in a burst ear drum and I pretty sure I got the flu too. All I wanted to do was sleep and throw up. I couldn't move because I hurt so much, because I was so dizzy and feeling so sick, keeping water down was an impossibility. And yet I stupidly struggled on. Until my body had enough and I was stuck in bed.

Thank goodness I have the worlds best husband though. He did the dishes, he did the washing, he cooked meals (even though I didn't want to eat), he kept the children amused and quiet and out of my hair, he brought me water and pain killers, changed the bed linen and went to work too.

During half term, Top Ender and Big Boy were brilliant about me being ill, they helped me fake being healthy and alive. when we had some visitors to show off the fantastic scents of Febreeze (it'll be on A Mother's Ramblings soon) they understood when I would tell them that I had to rest and helped me by getting drinks themselves instead of relying on me waiting on them hand and foot.

And now it's March and I'm feeling better (well better enough that I don't need to spend all day in bed) but I can't go to the gym. Exercising makes me really dizzy, and the pounding of my heart causes me the worst ear ache in my right eat. I want to go swimming, but with the burst ear drum it's a no no.

So March is going to be all about the walking.

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Family, Facebook and Death

noreply@blogger.com (Pippa W) — Fri, 01 Mar 2013 14:53:00 +0000

I have a large extended family. There are Cousins and Aunts and Uncles and Second Cousins ten times removed and everything in between, most of them I know and can tell you stories about them. You know like that's Sarah, she once played on the beach with me in a green swimsuit. Or that's my cousins husbands mothers niece who I met at the wedding and she used to run marathons.

Thanks to modern technology I was able to keep up with most of them. I could read Facebook updates, see pictures of their family, celebrate new jobs, births of babies, marriages and in some cases divorces!

Today though this modern tech that I take for granted gave me bad news. I found out through Facebook that there had been a death. A death of a beautiful young woman, just on the cusp of adulthood. A death I wouldn't have found out about for many months, if at all, if my cousin, this beautiful young woman's father, hadn't posted an update on Facebook.

So what's my point? I'm honestly not sure.

I'm thankful that my cousin has a place to tell all his friends and family what is happening in his life, that we are able to support him through this horrid time. I'm thankful that I was able to speak with him and tell him how sorry I was and then was able to reach out to my friends and family and was able to get people to pray for him and his family.

I'm not thankful for the same thing though. I'm not expecting my cousin to be thinking of phoning extended family to tell them the news when he must be reeling from the news himself but it's not how you expect to find out about a death though is it? Reading a status update amongst updates from people talking about how they have run out of toilet roll or how they have new hair cuts or how they have decided that they will have a bar of chocolate this afternoon.

I don't know the solution to this (I have some ideas) but I knew I wanted to share. Do you think there is an answer to this or even what the question is?

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