Viro: Welcome back to Feral Attraction! Joining me as a guest host this week is Klik Wolf. Klik, why don’t you take a moment to introduce yourself?

Klik: Hello, I'm klik Wolf. I'm an aspiring indie game dev and adult performer and I've been in the furry fandom for over 8 years but have just recently started getting involved in the community.

Introduction topic

What forms can sexualization of animals take?

Zoophilia

Taking a sexual interest in animals

Fantasizing about animals or animal parts in a sexual way

May include feral art / roleplay

Bestiality

Having sexual contact with an animal

Zoosadism

Torturing an animal for the purpose of sexual gratification

What are the ethics of having a sexual interest in animals?

Should we be tolerant of non-offending zoophiles?

What are the ethics of thought crimes?

What is the legality?

Sexual contact with animals is illegal in many jurisdictions, including most of the United States

Hawaii, Kentucky, Nevada, New Mexico, Texas, Vermont, West Virginia and Wyoming are the only states that lack explicit anti-bestiality laws

Toxic Popularity

What is the purpose of fandom?

The furry fandom was created to be a place where anyone could be accepted and supported, a fandom where people could forget about shallow ideas like popularity and enjoy the company of others without worrying about social pretenses. Unfortunately, many furs don't feel like this is the case.

How does popularity in the fandom actually work?

What tends to get social media attention

Often, things that are quite impersonal

Positivity

Memes

Relatable sentiments

Fursuit pics

Humor/Puns

Smut

Porn

What tends to make people avoid you

Often, things that are quite personal

Drama

Negativity

Contrarianism

(unless you’re popular specifically for being a troll)

Neediness

Desperation

Awkwardness

Inappropriateness

Cliques

Many groups of friends in the fandom are essentially by invitation only

It can be frustrating to attempt to befriend someone who is part of a clique

The value of a clique lies in there being an “outgroup” of people who supposedly “aren’t worthy” of being in

You do not need to internalize the message that you “aren’t worthy” just because a particular clique seems closed off to you

What are the downsides of popularity?

Haters

Some people will be envious of you and will take a dislike to you, or even work to sabotage you

Extra scrutiny

Lots of eyes and ears on you means people notice your mistakes (microaggressions, moments of weakness/anger, etc.)

Tone policing

Can feel like you need to wear a mask, not be “human”

Prejudice

People who know you by reputation can form first impressions of you without you ever actually meeting them

Can create a sense of paranoia

Emotional bandwidth

Fan interactions / fan service can become extremely draining and allow little time/energy for personal/intimate relationships

How do you want to show up in the fandom?

Why do you want to be popular?

Attention?

Sexual partner selection?

Influence?

Legacy?

Power?

What would popularity actually bring you?

Weigh pros/cons

How much of your “true self” are you willing to lose?

How can you show up in a likable but authentic way?

How else can you create the emotions you’re after?

Who do you really want to be well liked by?

Feedback

“I just found your podcasts the other day through Culturally F’d. You guys do a wonderful service for humanity and the anthro community. Life’s been fucking dark so I look forward to the new episodes and I’m speechless for how this fandom is matured. Without a doubt, thank you for everything you do, seriously. In just about 6 months I returned to being a furry after like 10 years, and everywhere I look I see so much to fucking love in this community. Especially resistance regaining ground against empire. Seems so unreal.” - Daisy

Question(s)

What is the first step to going from being a submissive to becoming a dominant in bed? After five years, my boyfriend wants to have me dominate and take control. I’m a little nervous and really unsure of how to start to ease into the role without becoming overwhelmed.

Received via Contact Form (name withheld)

FA 023 BDSM Roles Demystified: https://www.feralattraction.com/shownotes/fa023

Learning to be more dominant in bed advice column:
https://www.feralattraction.com/advice/learning-to-be-more-dominant-in-bed

Closer

Contact info

Contact Viro:

Telegram: t.me/viroscicollie

Twitter: twitter.com/viroscicollie

Contact Klik:

Telegram: t.me/Klik2097

Twitter: https://twitter.com/klik2097 (warning: 18+ NSFW)

Feral Attraction Twitter:

twitter.com/feralattractfm

Feral Attraction Contact Page:

feralattraction.com/contact

Coaching Services now available!

As our audience has grown, many of our listeners and advice column readers have asked to speak with Viro in a one-on-one setting so as to get help with resolving relationship issues or overcoming stumbling blocks that can trip us up on life's journey. Until now, it was not possible to offer such one-on-one attention, simply because of time constraints. Fortunately, Viro is now offering this kind of individualized attention as a service!

For more information, visit: feralattraction.com/coaching

Other business

Patreon

Joel Kreissman is a published author of anthropomorphic science-fiction in his Para-Imperium universe. His first novel, The Pride of Parahumans, was published with Thurston Howl publications in 2017 and he has more free stories on his blog at https://paraimperium.wordpress.com/

Intro

On this week’s show we open with a discussion of the history of happiness, and why happiness may be elusive. Soatok Dhole joins us to discuss our main topic, friendship — what is a good friendship, when is the right time to distance yourself from a friend, and how do you revive a fading friendship worth saving? We close with a question about how to handle developing feelings for a straight roommate.

Introduction topic

A history of happiness explains why capitalism makes us feel empty inside

Sean Illing - Vox

https://www.vox.com/science-and-health/2018/9/4/17759590/happiness-fantasy-capitalism-culture-carl-cederstrom

Topic

What is friendship?

“Essential and fundamental to friendship is that it is a natural, spontaneous, freely given and entered into relationship promised as much on subliminal cues that prompt liking as on anything that the parties could specify as a reason for engaging in it” – philosopher AC Grayling

Friend vs. friendly acquaintance

Common to both:

People who make you a better person

People who you enjoy spending time with

People who you have a history of shared experience with

People who share your values, your hobbies, your interests, and/or your kinks

Unique to friends:

People you can trust

People you can confide in

People you can be yourself around

Loyalty

Problems arise when you expect loyalty from someone you considered a friend, but who views you as a friendly acquaintance

What is a bad friendship?

“Our friends aren’t toxic — they’re just human”

Ephrat Livni - Quartz

https://qz.com/1352437/our-friends-arent-toxic-theyre-just-human/

Many people argue a “bad friend” is one who consistently brings you down or holds you back

“The current cultural discourse suggests that friends are people who we use to improve ourselves, and get rid of when the going gets tough or if we’re not having enough fun. … It’s friendship as a capitalistic exchange, instead of relationships involving people who care about each other, hanging out, and helping each other through life’s ups and downs.”

This philosophy leads many people to treat their friends as disposable, and to abandon them when they need support and are not contributing to the friendship — right when they need a friend the most

It is important to remember the golden rule in friendship, and to treat others as we’d like to be treated

You wouldn’t want to be abandoned during a time of hardship when you couldn’t be there for your friends as much as you’d like to be

Abandoning a friend at the first sign of conflict or distress in the relationship will leave you with very few friends

It is often worth it to attempt to reconcile or ignore certain conflicts for the sake of maintaining an otherwise valuable friendship

Friends who consistently do not support you, who do not share your values, and who have a history of being unreliable may be less worthy of continued or increased investment of time and other resources

In some circumstances, it can be worthwhile to invest in old friendships even when values and goals have drifted apart, for the sake of having someone who can “ground you” in your own history

It is difficult for new friends to offer the same level of insight that old friends can provide to you

If you have many old friends, and a particular friendship is no longer offering benefit to either of you, it is okay to let a friendship turn back into a friendly acquaintanceship

Keep in mind: people change over time (and that’s ok!)

What is a good friendship?

In general, it is wise to invest in friends who:

Share your values

Support you as you pursue your goals

Point out your weaknesses and mistakes in a loving way

It can be tempting to seek friends who tell you everything you do is awesome, but it’s wise to have a few close friends who can call you on your mistakes

Assume good faith: When your close friends suggest you’ve done something wrong, it is generally because they care about your success, and not because they want to put you down

Have a history of being trustworthy and reliable

It isn’t all about you

“Real friendship is a kind of love, writes philosopher Bennet Helm. As such, it must ‘involve a concern for your friend for his sake and not for your own.’”

It isn’t a great idea to be friends only with people who tell you everything you do is good

“A true friend didn’t just flatter and please. Quite the contrary, their value lie in the fact that they sometimes corrected or fought with their pals, to whom they’d give their all.”

Criticism that comes from a place of loyalty and respect, with the intent of making you a more authentic version of yourself, is very different from someone tearing you down

When you’re around a good friend, you should feel liberated to act with authenticity.

How do you revive a friendship?

How to Revive a Friendship

Anna Goldfarb — The New York Times

https://www.nytimes.com/2018/07/26/smarter-living/how-to-revive-a-friendship.html

Start by “identifying what variables, if any, have changed since your falling out.”

“Maybe you’re in a more stable place in life and are confident you can be a better, more attentive friend this time around.”

“Thinking about the reasons you grew apart and how things might be different now can help you take the steps needed to rebuild a closer and longer lasting friendship.”

Make the first move!

If neither of you reach out, you won’t talk

Being vulnerable and honest about missing your former friend can help you reconnect if they’re feeling the same way

Be prepared for rejection

Game out what you’d say and what you’d do to feel better if you are rejected

Assume good faith

It’s possible your friend would love to talk to you, but the thought just hasn’t occurred to them, because many other things are on their mind

It’s harmless to remind them you exist and would like to talk

Establish interest in re-establishing the friendship before jumping into emotionally difficult topics

Go in as if this were a new friendship

Start small with light topics and catching up on what is new with each of you

Good topics for conversation are anecdotes and requests for advice that focus on what is shared between you right now

Similar life experiences

Places you’ve both been to

Where you are in life

Location

Career

Lifestyle/Living Situation

Try socializing at first in a group setting

Game night

Movie night

Dinner party

Outing to a park for a hike or picnic

Try to present your best self

This will remind your former friend what they liked about you to begin with

It isn’t always possible to get back to the same level of friendship you had before

Be willing to accept a less intimate relationship, at least at first

Feedback

None for this week

Question(s)

I live with my best friend, who is a straight male. I am a gay male furry, and I am crushing hard on the the friend that I live with. How can I continue to be friends with him given the feelings I cannot share?

Received via Telegram (name withheld)

Closer

Contact info

Contact Viro:

t.me/viroscicollie

twitter.com/viroscicollie

Contact Soatok:

https://twitter.com/SoatokDhole

https://soatok.com

Feral Attraction Twitter:

twitter.com/feralattractfm

Feral Attraction Contact Page:

feralattraction.com/contact

Coaching Services now available!

As our audience has grown, many of our listeners and advice column readers have asked to speak with Viro in a one-on-one setting so as to get help with resolving relationship issues or overcoming stumbling blocks that can trip us up on life's journey. Until now, it was not possible to offer such one-on-one attention, simply because of time constraints. Fortunately, Viro is now offering this kind of individualized attention as a service!

For more information, visit: feralattraction.com/coaching

Other business

Patreon

Joel Kreissman is a published author of anthropomorphic science-fiction in his Para-Imperium universe. His first novel, The Pride of Parahumans, was published with Thurston Howl publications in 2017 and he has more free stories on his blog at https://paraimperium.wordpress.com/

THE MOST RELAXING VACATION YOU CAN TAKE IS GOING NOWHERE AT ALL

Ephrat Livni - Quartzy

https://qz.com/quartzy/1342058/the-most-relaxing-vacation-you-can-take-is-going-nowhere-at-all/

Importance of unstructured time

“Dolce far niente” - the sweet joy of doing nothing

“Remaining close to home—or just in it, hanging out—leaves you refreshed and provides perspective. And it may be the key to your next great idea.”

Become comfortable with being alone with yourself; wherever you go, your self comes with!

Take time to be present and enjoy wherever you are

avoid having a completionist mindset of ticking boxes just to say you’ve been somewhere

Topic

When is it a good idea to step away from family?

Toxic behavior

Emotional blackmail/coercion

Abusive/threatening behavior

Lack of acceptance

Need to create space to establish own values/priorities

Why reconnect with family?

Source of stability/constancy in your life

Reconnecting with unconditional love underlying family bonds

Greater understanding of self (family of origin)

If they loved you before, they can love you again

Support Structure

When is the right time to reconnect with family?

Financial independence

Stable, independent living situation

no risk, nothing to lose if your family chooses to reject you.

After time to heal / develop “new normal”

“Most parents prefer having a gay son to no son at all”
- Dan Savage

Times of crisis (family member ill/dying)

How to reconnect with family

Non-violent communication

Provide “first-aid” empathy

Seek to understand before seeking to be understood

Express your feelings and needs without placing blame or judgement on your family members

Look for a “win-win”

“My lifestyle is not the same as your lifestyle, but both are okay, and we can choose to live the life that we want”

Look for ways to spend time together that will meet everyone’s needs

Don’t rush it, go at your own pace

Reconnection isn’t going to happen overnight

Feedback

None for this week

Question(s)

What are some of the best techniques you could offer to help get over a toxic relationship? Doesn’t matter if it’s romantic or friends.

Self-empathy

Self-care

Choosing to control what you can (your actions/perceptions/interpretations) and release control of what you cannot (your abuser’s past actions, what your abuser does now)

Forgive your abuser (even if you don’t let them know)

Empathy and understanding can lessen pain

Forgiveness does not absolve someone of being responsible for their actions or of being held accountable

Forgive yourself for allowing the abuse to happen as long as it did

You are only capable of doing your best at any given moment, given the information you have

It is impossible to make a mistake; mistake is a judgement applied to an action after it has occurred

Figure out what you were getting from the toxic relationship

Try to figure out how you can get these needs met in a healthier way

Be mindful not to enter into a relationship with someone very like your previous partner

We are often attracted to what feels familiar, not what feels good

Closer

Contact info

Contact Viro:

t.me/viroscicollie

twitter.com/viroscicollie

Contact Rhythm:

twitter.com/Rhythm_Fox

t.me/RhythmFox

Feral Attraction Twitter:

twitter.com/feralattractfm

Feral Attraction Contact Page:

feralattraction.com/contact

Coaching Services now available!

As our audience has grown, many of our listeners and advice column readers have asked to speak with Viro in a one-on-one setting so as to get help with resolving relationship issues or overcoming stumbling blocks that can trip us up on life's journey. Until now, it was not possible to offer such one-on-one attention, simply because of time constraints. Fortunately, Viro is now offering this kind of individualized attention as a service!

For more information, visit: feralattraction.com/coaching

Other business

Patreon

Joel Kreissman is a published author of anthropomorphic science-fiction in his Para-Imperium universe. His first novel, The Pride of Parahumans, was published with Thurston Howl publications in 2017 and he has more free stories on his blog at https://paraimperium.wordpress.com/

Rebooting the show

Update on what’s been happening during the hiatus

Explaining the new format

Topic

What Are Values?

“a person's principles or standards of behavior; one's judgment of what is important in life” - Google Dictionary

We use our values to make judgements, particularly judgements of good and bad or right and wrong

Chase’s perspective on values

Personal constitution or bill of rights

Values (In Combination with Morals and Ethics) form a personal doctrine by which to live

Affects all decisions in Life

Much like Laws, can be changed but it is a difficult process

Where Do Our Values Come From?

Parents

Peers

Friends

Relationship partners

Society

Society at large

Subcultures we participate in

Types of Values

Fear-based values

Values based on fear are those that cause you to take action in order to avoid something

Think “have to”

Common fear-based values

Safety / Security

Absence of pain

Avoidance of conflict/confrontation

Physical appearance

Power/Control

Privacy

Religousity (fear of hell)

Recognition / Respect

Knowledge (based in fear of the unknown)

Consciousness-based values

What do we mean by consciousness?

Consciousness is your awareness of who you *really* are, as opposed to the “you” that you believe yourself to be, or the you that you were taught you were supposed to be

Consciousness-based values are those that cause you to take action to bring something desirable into your world

Think “want to”

Common consciousness-based values:

Pleasure/sensuality (as opposed to absence of pain)

Freedom (as opposed to security)

“Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety.” - Ben Franklin

Achievement

Vs recognition (internal to self)

Leadership

Vs. control/management
(lead self before leading others)

Adventure/novelty

Autonomy

Spirituality (vs. religiousity, internal/external)

Chase Wolf: Notes on his experiences growing up in a religious household and finding spirituality outside of that setting.

Personal growth

Intimacy (vs privacy)

Community

A metavalue; valuing others who share your values

Important to know what your values are and what those of your community are to know whether it’s a good fit

If a conflict in values are present:

Accept paying the “price of admission” to be part of the community and tolerate the difference

Examine your values, and decide whether yours should change

Choose not to be a part of the community, and find a community that is a better fit for you

Chase Wolf: Notes on changes in the Gamer Community values and the impacts thereof.

Self-expression

Fulfillment

Truth

Justice

Knowledge (based in curiosity, as opposed to fear of the unknown)

Chase Wolf: Notes on his curiosity in understanding the ABDL/Baby-Fur community allowing a shift in opinion

Having fear-based values is not necessarily a bad thing, but as a general rule, happier people tend to hold more consciousness-based values than fear-based values

Chase Wolf: Often, fear-based values are those instilled in us by friends, family, and society.

Choosing Your Values

Think of each new moment as a fresh opportunity to decide who you want to be; the greatest freedom is the freedom of choice

“It is better to follow the voice inside and be at war with the whole world, than to follow the ways of the world and be at war with your deepest self” - Counselor and educator Michael Pastore

What are your values?

What situations or conflicts make you highly emotional, either positively or negatively?

Think about what value was respected in the situations that made you feel positively

Think about what value was not respected in the situations that made you feel negatively

Empowering questions to ask yourself:

What am I unwilling to tolerate?

What am I unwilling to give up?

What recharges my batteries?

What really makes me feel excited?

What experiences or activities have the most meaning for me?

Why do I “need” the things I tell myself I need?

When do I compromise my values? Why?

What keeps me going when times get tough?

Where is there a gap between who I am and who I really know myself to be?

Why choose new values?

When different values conflict with one another

Reconciling values with a relationship partner or a community

When acting according to a certain value just doesn’t feel right

When you realize a value is coming from outside, and isn’t something you really care about

When a particular value is constantly transgressed, to the point that it is draining your energy and emotional bandwidth

When failing to live up to a value is causing you great deals of shame, guilt, anger, anxiety, or fear

How Chase changed his values to serve him better

How changes in Chase’s values allowed him to overcome issues in his life

Values Assessment Tool

https://www.dropbox.com/s/qg8hegtswsullwk/Values%20Assessment.doc?dl=0

Feedback

None for this week

Question(s)

Subject: Mates now metamours

My two mates recently broke up with each other leaving me in the middle. One mate is desperately clinging to me and the other is constantly offering advice on how to keep my other relationship healthy. How do I just let things happen without the other thinking they had a hand in it?

Received via contact form (anonymous)

Closer

Contact info

Contact Viro:

t.me/viroscicollie

twitter.com/viroscicollie

Contact Chase:

twitter.com/Chase_WolfBTG

wolf4life.bandcamp.com

Feral Attraction Twitter:

twitter.com/feralattractfm

Feral Attraction Facebook:

facebook.com/feralattractfm

Feral Attraction Contact Page:

feralattraction.com/contact

Coaching Services now available!

As our audience has grown, many of our listeners and advice column readers have asked to speak with Viro or Metriko in a one-on-one setting so as to get help with resolving relationship issues or overcoming stumbling blocks that can trip us up on life's journey. Until now, it was not possible to offer such one-on-one attention, simply because of time constraints. Fortunately, Viro is now offering this kind of individualized attention as a service!

For more information, visit feralattraction.com/coaching.

Other business

Patreon

Joel Kreissman is a published author of anthropomorphic science-fiction in his Para-Imperium universe. His first novel, The Pride of Parahumans, was published with Thurston Howl publications in 2017 and he has more free stories on his blog at https://paraimperium.wordpress.com/

We open this week with a discussion on FOSTA. This is an American bill that is soon to become law that is having a chilling effect on how we use the internet, and the impacts are being felt worldwide. We discuss what the bill is, why it's ten types of awful, and how this impacts the furry fandom. We at Feral Attraction would encourage those who feel so inclined to visit the Electronic Frontier Foundation to learn even more and find ways you can resist this awful legislation. 

Our main topic is on sexual roles. We go over the different axes that are present when it comes to sexual determination and how everything is fluid and in motion. We talk about how the persona you portray becomes your truth and the beacon by which you attract people in your life, how pretense is prologue and determines the lifestyle that you lead, and why it's not a bad idea to experiment with your sexual roles. 

We close out this episode with a question on poly and friendship. Our questioner is interested in a poly relationship with one of his friend's husband, but his friend doesn't want that. How can he keep his new romantic attachment and his friend? Spoiler alert: he probably can't. 

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks for everything everyone and, as always, be well!

We open this week with a discussion on to best mediate conflicts in relationships. While this is a topic that we've covered before we wanted to present an alternate take from one of the main contributors from PolyWeekly, LustyGuy, as he offers his views on how to fight fair in a relationship to ensure everyone has the maximum potential to "win".

Our main topic is on transitions. During the course of last week's episode we discovered that this was a topic that we both wanted to delve into, so here we are. We talk about what the more common transitions that we will face in life are, and the ways we can best broach them, prepare for them, and thrive from them. 

We close out this week's show with a question about compatibility. Our questioner keeps dating guys that he discovers aren't compatible with him once they start dating. Is this a question of romantic connection, vulnerability, or of being true to yourself? 

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode. 

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion on our appearance on the wonderful podcast, Life on the Swingset. You can hear us talk about ethical non-monogamy in the fandom on Episode 317 BY CLICKING HERE or by visiting their website, lifeontheswingset.com. 

We also talk about why loving someone else isn't always enough to make love happen. We go over why unrequited love can often feel so strong and certain yet it goes absolutely nowhere. 

Our main topic is on how to maintain independence in a relationship. We talk about why it's important to do so, what happens when you become codependent, and ways to practice independent living.

We close out the show with a question of mismatched motivation drives in a relationship. Is this a relationship killer, or can this be overcome?

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode. 

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with an exciting announcement about our upcoming guest appearance on the Life on the Swingset podcast! Thanks again to our lovely hosts for inviting us-- we had a blast and please feel free to stop by our show anytime!

We also discuss the latest comic from OhJoySexToy that focuses on discovering polyamory and the mistakes that people often encounter.

Our main topic this week is on Stale Relationships. We discuss what makes a relationship stale, how to reinvigorate a relationship that's gotten routine, and how to identify if it's even a relationship that is salvageable. 

We close out the show with some feedback on Episode 071 concerning our advice to the questioner on real life appearance vs online presence and a question from our Telegram chat (salut Tiyu) that asks whether or not a quarter-life furry crisis is something that people go through within our fandom.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode. 

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's episode with an actual retrospective of the show. As it is our 100th episode we wanted to take some time to reflect on the show. We talk about why we started the show, how we've grown in doing the show, and how we've seen the fandom (and culture in general) change in the two years we've been doing the show. We then talk about the future of the show and our personal futures and what plans we have coming up.

We then launch into the main topic for this week, difficult decisions. In an average day we make 70 active decisions, and oftentimes we find ourselves overburdened with the choices we make. Metriko talks about his decision making process and how he's worked to improve and streamline it to be manageable and more helpful than stressful.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode. 

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion our panel on TFF. We then launch into a conversation about a recent article from the New York Times about how porn might be causing harm in the approach teenagers have toward sexual encounters. We discuss whether or not porn should be expected to be an educator for sex and what we can do better on a societal level.

Our main topic is on Active Listening and Maintaining Empathy. We've had many episodes on how to use nonviolent communication. This is only half of the equation, and that you must employ active listening skills in order to maintain empathy and find a way to bridge the divide between perspectives. We also talk about the terrifying concept that we as people can be fallible and oftentimes are the ones who are causing stress in a relationship, and how we can employ active listening to lower our barriers and identify ways to communicate and reciprocate everyone's wants and needs in a relationship.

We close out the show with a question on anal-- a top is concerned with the amount of Santorum produced when he has sex with his fuck buddy. How can he talk to his friend with benefits about douching before dicking?

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion on recent studies into cuckolding. A recent article in CNN goes through the potential benefits of cuckolding as researched in an academic article co-authored by friend of the show and agony uncle expert, Dan Savage!

Our main topic is on protecting your online identity. We bring on our friend, Soatok (https://twitter.com/SoatokDhole) who is an expert on Information Security, and he leads us on a terrifying discussion on how insecure your information online might be and ways you can mitigate against having anything stolen.

We close out the show with a question on poly-quads. While triads are more popular and accessible for people in the poly community, what happens when two couples get together to form a quad? Is it swinging or something more?

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

Welcome to our first episode of 2018! Thank you for your continued support this year and we hope that this is a year filled with love and laughter for you and yours.

We open this week's discussion with a review of 2018 so far. We briefly touch on Further Confusion and our panel and party there, and have a brief discussion of our respective vacations, cover bands, and how we use the support we get from our Patrons in order to grow our event schedule and make it out to more panel opportunities.

We then shift into our ninth all questions show! We've received a ton of email during our time away and we wanted to address some of the backlog. We go over questions ranging from long distance libido, sexual insecurity, and how to stop chafing your junk when you dry hump. It's a sexy question time this week on Feral Attraction!

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a reflection of our year. We talk about the show, areas we want to improve in the year to come, and the important highlights in our lives. We find it's important to look at the good moments and find ways to cultivate more of them moving forward, especially in a year that was difficult for many of our listeners.

Our main topic is a continuation on our yearly retrospective: journaling and self reflection. We talk about how and why we journal, and detail two different styles that are commonly used: Bullet Journaling and Emotional Intelligence Journaling. We go through the strengths of both styles and how these can be used to focus your life, focus your strengths, and aid you in living an intentional, uninhibited life.

As this is the final show of the year we at Feral Attraction wish you and those in your life a 2018 that is fulfilled with love and laughter. We will be back in Mid-January with our first episode of Season 3.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion of social media and health. During the end of the year it can be a time of social anxiety and depression, especially for those of us encountering the cold, dark, winter months. We talk about a recent study that shows how social media can be used as a means of finding support but cautions about what can happen when that support becomes your sole means of communication.

Our main topic this week is on Cuckholding and Hotwifeing. While you might refer to Hotwifeing as Hothusbanding or Hotspousing, we tend to use Hotwifeing but mean it in a neutral fashion. We talk about the differences between Cuckholding and Hotwifeing, how to safely and sanely get involved in either, and what the ultimate risks for this kink are. We also touch on the fun part of "why do people enjoy humiliation". This is a fun discussion about an often ridiculed and misunderstood portion of the kink community with serious undertones of the dangerous elements involved when you introduce a bull into the china shop that is your relationship.

We close out the show with a question on selfishness: our questioner is worried and feels guilty whenever they act in selfishness in their relationship. Should they be more selfless, or is there a way to practice ethical selfishness without turning into Ayn Rand?

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

As a programming note next week will be our last episode of the year and we will be taking the first two weeks of 2018 off for vacation and business related travels. 

Thanks and, as always, be well! 

We open this week's show with a discussion of MFF. We wanted to talk about our panel, our party, what went right, and what the plans moving forward for future conventions will be. As MFF is now the world's largest furry convention we wanted to spend a little bit of time talking about it and having Viro share his experiences in lieu of a serious top of the show.

We then dive headfirst into our eighth all questions show. We cover topics from choosing between potential lovers, to divorce, to handling jealousy when your partners find more sexual outlets than you do in your open, polyamorous relationship. We also open up a bit about our lives and ways that we've overcome obstacles that many of our questioners are currently facing.

We close out the show with some feedback from the questioner in Episode 094 as well as a voicemail feedback on topics discussed in Episode 093.

A minor correction: Metriko talks about a strip club in Tampa named 2001 Odyssey, however in the episode he refers to it as Sex Odyssey 3000. Mea culpa.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion on a comic concerning cuckholding from Oh Joy Sex Toy! We go over what cuckholding is and why there has been heightened focus on people who are cucks within the past few years. What starts out as a lighthearted discussion almost turned into a full episode's worth of content. Stay tuned for a future show on cuckholding because we have a lot to say on this topic!

Our main topic is on Sexual Etiquette. While we've discussed more of the varsity ideals of sex, we realized that we had not had a talk about the basics. An oversight on our behalf has turned into a discussion of best practices, of things you can ask, look for, and try to do. We talk about mistakes we've made, ways we've learned, and whether or not you should "superman that hoe". 

We close out the show with a question on breaking up. Our questioner has more to lose than romance if he breaks up with his boyfriend-- should he keep in a relationship he wants to end in order to keep the additional benefits? 

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion on marijuana and sex drive. Conventional wisdom says that the more you smoke pot the less likely you are to be active at anything, sex included. However, recent studies show that daily users of pot tend to have more sex than average. We discuss why this might be and why more research is needed.

Our main topic is on family. During the holiday season a lot of us will be returning home to visit family, friends, and other people we grew up with. As young adults (or burgeoning adults) we have to begin to transition our mindset from that of a child to that of an independent adult. How can we accomplish this in a way that is ethical and empathetic. 

You also might be in the position of being a teenager living at home. How can you work with your parents to find a way to meet your wants while also meeting their needs? 

We close out the show with some feedback on reduced cost mental health services and a question on how to handle an abusive parent when you are a younger teen. 

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's episode with a discussion on stoicism. On the show we've often discussed the tenants of stoicism in a general sense, however we recently found an article that we thought would be a great introduction for people who want to learn more about this school of thought. We talk about our lives and how we've grown from being more stoic in our approach to the hardships of life.

Our main topic is on porn and masturbation. One of the common pitfalls that relationships can encounter is the usage of porn or of self-stimulation without your mate(s) being around or being aware. We talk about when to discuss porn usage, how to discuss it, and why porn and masturbation may not, in itself, be the villain it is often made out to be.

We close out the show with a question on finding romantic love. Our questioner wants a relationship but he can't find one using the apps he has. Is he looking for love in all the wrong places, or is he perhaps wrong in how he is approaching it. 

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion of a recent article in the New York Times concerning the rise of anxiety amongst American youth. We look at recent studies done that try to explain the sources of anxiety that we face in the modern day, as well as ways we can work to counteract it in our everyday lives.

Our main topic is on Communication Mismatches. After a discussion in our Telegram group concerning relationships where communication styles are not complementary (especially in regard to Nonviolent Communication), we wanted to go over this in more detail. What are the more common types of communication styles, how can they be improved on, and what do you do in a relationship where the communication styles are so different the relationship turns combative more often than not.

We close out the show with a question on breaking up. A younger questioner is blocked from talking to his boyfriend by potentially homophobic parents. Should he break up or not? 

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion on video games and sex ed. Is there room for crafted video games and smart phone apps that target vulnerable teenagers who may not have the best access to a sex-positive education about sexual health?

Our main topic is on getting a derailed convention back on track. Over the past two weeks we have discussed how to get to a con and what to do at a con: this week is all about what to do when something goes wrong at a con. We talk about mitigation strategies for commonly encountered issues from injury, hangover, hotel room issues, travel delays, and more. It's a conversational show as we talk about situations we've been in personally and ways that we have overcome them.

We close out the show with feedback on volunteering at a convention and a question on seeking love when you believe yourself to be undeserving of affection.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion on the difficulty of admitting fault. We look into an article that analyzes why we as people are unlikely to seek responsibility for our mistakes and shortcomings. Is this an issue of the ego or is it something deeper, and how can this harm us in the long run? 

Our main topic is our F.A.G. to Convention Attendance. With last week covering how to plan for the convention, this week we talk about how to enjoy a convention to the best of your ability. Part recap, part conversational, this is a show meant for newcomers to conventions. Spoiler: next week we talk about when the convention plans go awry and how to triage that. 

We close with some feedback on our previous episodes and a question on admitting love in the face of difficulty-- our questioner is closeted, unsure of his sexuality, and unsure how his friends and family will react if he follows through on his feelings for another male. What is he to do? 

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion of an article on nonviolent communication. A relationship counselor spoke of the power of the word 'ouch', which at first glance sounds rather strange, but in examination this word has the form of an emotional safeword with the power to potentially shift an argument into an empathetic, vulnerable discussion that leads to resolution.

Our main topic is on Planning Your First Con. While Feral Attraction is a show about relationships, it is also a show about the furry fandom. We have gotten several questions from listeners who are interested in attending their first con, and we have decided to do a two part episode on conventions in this lead up to convention season. In this episode we talk about how to choose and budget for your first ever convention. While not a super sexy episode, we hope that this helps everyone in their planning process.

We close out the show with a question on roleplay. The questioner loves sending yiffy pictures and then having sexy talk with the people he's exchanging the pictures with. His boyfriend doesn't want him to have those conversations and would like for him to just send and receive those pictures. Neither of them can see eye to eye-- what can they do?

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion on depression and mindfulness. Conventional treatment for depression and anxiety has worked under the impression that it is due to a skewed view of stressed from the past or present, but recent research shows that we become more anxious or depressed over false visions and fortune telling of what the future might hold. We take a look into an analysis of a book concerning this topic, Homo Prospectus, and what it might hold for future treatment of these conditions.

Our main topic is on lifestyling. Within the furry fandom, the idea of lifestying often tends to come accompanied with derision or words of caution about being "too furry". We talk about why lifestyling can be fun and fulfilling, how to go about it, and how to balance it out with your own life responsibilities to ensure you don't neglect your life outside of the fandom. We also discuss ways you can get into lifestyling with other communities like BDSM.

We close out this week's episode with a question on asexual dating. A straight, ace male is worried that he will not find a partner that can look after his periodic kinks and general submissiveness. We talk about the virtues of sex workers and why looking for a relationship is not always the solution to improving yourself. 

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion on the faulty science currently being used on US College Campuses to investigate and adjudicate sexual assault. While well purposed, the science cited by several leaders in the newer movements to protect college students from sexual assault is in several cases outdated, under researched, or incorrect in application. The impact of this ranges from sexual abusers finding loopholes to avoid legal prosecution to innocent bystanders getting caught up and forced to change their entire lives as a result. We take a look at part two of a three part series published on The Atlantic concerning this issue and the ramifications it has for college aged students and their sex lives.  

Our main topic for the week dovetails from the top of the show and discusses sex regret. Oftentimes we as consenting, sexually active individuals have sexual encounters that, the morning after, we find ourselves feeling less than enthused that it happened. We talk about why this is, whether it is normal, and ways you can shake it off.

We close out this weeks show with some feedback from last week's fictiophilia question and a new question: what do you do when you find out your boyfriend has not just another secret boyfriend, but multiple secret boyfriends?

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

On this week's show we open with a discussion on Mobile Phones and relationships. In recent years, studies show that the higher the level of technoference (technological interference) in your relationship, the less fulfilled and happy you are in it. We talk about why this is and ways you can prevent phubbing (phone snubbing) your lover when you want to check your Twitter DMs.

Our main topic this week is all questions-- it's our seventh all questions show! We answer questions on topics of Fictiophilia, Expectations, Entitlement, Relationship Goals, and Potential Abusive Behavior. It's a wild ride as we tackle some of the more difficult questions we have in our queue.

We close out the show with some feedback from an individual who, in past years, was in a relationship with a Pick Up Artist. She offers her insight and advice on the community.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

Metriko here! On this week's show Viro had a schedule conflict, so I'm solo-hosting.

I open with a discussion on passion. I had a conversation late last week with my roommate about why I do this show (when it takes up a majority of my time) and I realized that all-too-often we downplay or apologize for the things we are passionate about. I talk about never apologizing for your passions and how to balance a work/life ratio to ensure you don't neglect your well-being.

My main topic this week is on Pick Up Artists (PUAs). I wanted to talk about them because I think they are unethical assholes, and the methods that they offer prey not only on misconceptions, but also the vulnerable. With the fandom being a wonderful, liminal experience, it becomes important that we speak about unethical behavior when it comes to finding dates and fuckbuddies. While PUAs are primarily males that want to have sex with females, it is important to note that the techniques and skills that they practice are used in the LGBTQ+ community as well.

I talk in generalities about what they practice, what they teach, and why all of this is bad in the short and long run. I talk about the fallacies of the law of averages, and why the skills they have may not pay the bills.

I don't close out with a question this evening, but try to tie everything together with some feedback about denying interest or passion and how a listener was able to move forward with pursuing their interests thanks to the show. Next week, to compensate for the lack of a question, we have our seventh all questions show.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

On this week's show we open with a discussion on valedictorians in high school. With so many people focused on finding a mate that has scholastic success we look into a study done of high school valedictorians and where they end up in life. Much like our previous discussions on success, this one might surprise you!

Our main topic is on DIY BDSM. With so many furries interested in the world of BDSM and with limited income, it can be a difficult choice between a steamy piece of art or a steamy piece of leather. For some, pre-fashioned gear lacks a personal touch, or maybe you want to remake that scene in Ghost (except with a whip instead of pottery). Fortunately, BDSM equipment is easy enough to fashion or, in some cases, a little imagination can convert common household items into playtoys (we call those pervertables). We discuss ways you can safely, sanely, and consensually fashion toys for use in your home without breaking the budget (or yourself)!

We close out the show with a question on selfish love. Our questioner loses arousal doing foreplay his partner loves: is there a middle ground to be had?

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

On this week's show we open with a serious discussion on forgiveness in the fandom. After the events in Charlottesville, we talk about the radical, racist elements in the fandom. It's no secret that we at Feral Attraction stand with those who stand against bigotry, racism, and hateful elements within the fandom (and at large), however the question of how to forgive people who were misguided participants in these groups has come up. How do we forgive those who, through misguided judgement or a perverse search for acceptance, found themselves on the wrong side of history?

We shift to a less serious main topic on Furry Sex and Yiff! While slightly academic, we talk about why we have sex. The secret answer is that we aren't entirely certain. We go over some theories and then launch into a discussion on what the future of sex looks like and why we, as furries, might actually be blazing the trail when it comes to the integration of technology and emotional intimacy. We also discuss how real-life, meatspace sex can be different for furries as opposed to mundane individuals and couples.

We close out the show with a question on small penis shame. For men who have a smaller unit how do they move past shame when their mate (or perhaps a metamour) might have a smaller penis. We talk about why penis size or girth is not important and how to accept 'yes' as an answer.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion about extramarital sex and relationships. Research likes to show that the older you get the more likely you are to engage in extramarital relationships. We discuss why the research might be biased against ethical polyamory and tear apart an article on the subject.

Our main topic is on Underwear and Sex Party Etiquette. For individuals at conventions or seeking play events within their local communities, the idea of a party centered around sex or mutual appreciation can seem rather overwhelming at first. We talk about what the do's and do not's are, as well as go over how to properly attend and organize such an event.

We close out the show with a question on guilt. For many people who have hurt others (either intentionally or not), the sensation of guilt after you have made amends can take some time to overcome. We talk about how you can move past your own feelings of guilt and shame and the role of ritual in healing and cleansing.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

On this week's show we open with a discussion video games and employment. Recent studies show that more young men than ever before are playing video games rather than seeking employment. Does this make us unhappy, and what lessons can we learn from all of this?

Our main topic is on First Times. Continuing our summer of conversation and introspection we discuss our first times and how they went great (but, really, how awful they were). We also give some advice on what the best practices are for a positive first time experience. Part whimsical, part sentimental, and entirely too much information, it promises to be a a fun trip down memory lane. 

We close out the show with some feedback on murrsuit care as well as two questions-- one on how to break up with a clingy past relationship partner who refuses to dampen the flame of their desire for you, the other on how to get started in the fandom and whether female murrsuiters exist.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

On this week's show we open with the segment that Viro had on the Savage Lovecast with Dan Savage. We discuss why Metriko was not involved (it's okay) and what our intended points were. Thanks again to Dan Savage and his team for allowing us to air this content for you to enjoy.

Our main topic is on murrsuits. We discuss the practicality and the acceptability of the murrsuit. We discuss the difference between modified fursuits and murrsuits, whether they should be worn in public, and how to take care of your suit. It's another dive into the deep end as we go into one of the more popular (and scandalous) fetishes in the furry fandom.

We close out the show with two questions: one on dating if you are neurologically atypical, the other on how to date someone who comes from a traditional family that does not approve of your relationship-- at what point should you dump your bride to be when their family is abusive?

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

This week we open with a conversation on weed. Many people think that it is strictly for relaxation or for creativity, but are there applications for marijuana in the bedroom as an aphrodisiac? We look at a study and try to remove the stigma from sativa. 

Our main topic is a relaxed show. In response to last year's episode on our relationship mistakes, many people think that we are masters of sex. This is not the case. We talk about problems, errors, mistakes, and negative situations we've come across in our sex play throughout our life? Want to hear about the time that Viro had his dick pepper sprayed? About the time a guy laughed at a commercial and voided all over Metriko's bed? Want to take pleasure in our past miseries? This is your episode!

We close out the show with two questions: one on getting over negativity, the other on finding affordable sex toys and fetish gear. 

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

This week we open with a discussion on the nine habits of emotionally intelligent people. On this show we like to talk about stoicism and pragmatism, but healthy relationships also take a good deal of emotional intelligence to ensure that you fight the right fights and cultivate your own integrity and moral compass. While clickbait-y in nature, we go over an article concerning these habits.

Our main topic is on Polyamorous and Monogamous Mixed Relationships. What happens when a monogamous individual dates a polyamorous individual who seeks other partners? What happens when one partner wants to keep the relationship closed but the other wants it to be open? We discuss our own experiences in relationships of this style, the pitfalls and warning signs to look out for, and ways to make this relationship style as healthy and ethical as possible.

We close out the show with two questions: one on erectile dysfunction, the other on a friend's fiance being potentially abusive. At what point do you abandon your friends when they make potentially destructive choices for their own life?

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

This week we open with a longer discussion on Gay Pride and the overall LGBT/Queer movement. After discussions on Twitter, Telegram, and other methods with friends and fellow queer individuals, it came to our attention that a lot of the history of queer people has not been shared, taught, or found important. We talk about the importance of queer history and why we must continue to fight for rights for all individuals who share intersectionality with our community.

Our main topic is on sensual touch and erogenous zones. We talk about how to find the parts of your body that you respond to the most, and give you some ideas as to how you can explore these places by yourself or with a mate.

We close out the show with some feedback on last week's Long Distance D/s question, and have a new question from someone who does not find their partner attractive in real life, but thinks that their fursona is super hot. Is there a problem with him, and if so how should he proceed to correct it?

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

This week we open with a discussion on how to identify ways that your fuckbuddy, roleplay partner, or new romantic interest might not be into you. We look at an article from Grindr's blog (yes, we read it for the articles) concerning five ways to identify how he might just not be into you. We then tack on our own five and give examples from our own lives.

Our main section this week is our sixth All Questions Show! We cover a diverse range of topics, from how to decide between two potential lovers, to how to go about making friends in real life when no one seems to like you, to whether or not it is okay to not be interested in someone because of a perceived gap in intelligence. We offer our advice and, as always, invite you to offer your own takes on these issues. 

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

This week we open with a discussion on Social Media and self-confidence. We look at recent studies from Princeton University and the University of South Wales that looks into whether or not tailoring your social media accounts and working to get likes and retweets actually acts as a self-confidence booster. Not to spoil you, but the answer is no, it does not.

Our main portion of the show is our fifth All-Questions Show! We take a trip through our backlog of questions, ranging from helping a younger fur in a conservative household with dating advice, to how to ensure your genuine self is being portrayed to potential partners online, to materials and resources for a couple wanting to slightly open up their relationship. Several of these questions are longer and, as always, we invite you to offer your feedback and offer your own take, especially if you think we missed the mark.

We close out the show with some feedback on our previous episode's question on how to remain optimistic when you feel like your life has been put on hold.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion on low self-esteem and sacrifice. We look at research that shows that the lower the self-esteem one has, the higher the level of resentment that one can feel at the sacrifices one make in a relationship. We discuss ways to avoid these feelings of resentment and how to avoid making positive reinforcement a transactional reaction. 

Our main topic is on Short Term Relationships. We talk about Summer Loving and how to have a blast. Many people like to look down on short term relationships as they are "temporary" and "fleeting", but we at Feral Attraction believe that you shouldn't measure a relationship by the length of time or the depth of commitment but by how happy you and your partner(s) are made within the relationship. 

We close out this week's show with two questions: one on polyamorous parenting and dating, and the other on how to move forward and remain optimistic in a life that makes you feel like you are on pause while everyone is moving ahead of you. 

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion on sexting. Mainstream media likes to report on the fact that sexting is corrupting our youth and pushing us to make uninformed sex choices and practice unsafe (and possibly illegal) behaviors. We look at research that analyzes whether such a correlation exists and, if so, what can we do to stop the spread of evil sexting (spoiler: there is no such correlation and sexting is pretty swell).

Our main topic is on exhibitionism and other thrills. All too often we at Feral Attraction are asked why people like having sex outside, or why we think it's okay for people to wear tame BDSM gear at conventions, or why we think it's okay for people to privately engage in kink in public. We go through why people might like exhibitionism, what to look out for, and share stories about times where we've skirted the law on these issues. 

We close out the show with a classic situation: furry meets furry, furry likes furry, but furry doesn't know what furry looks like in real life. How can you ask people you've met online to send you a picture of them in person without coming off like a superficial creep. We examine this (and talk about AOL Chatrooms: a/s/l, pic s2r, hyd).

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

This week we open with a discussion on negative and positive thinking. We go through an article on how negativity can impact your overall health, and ways that medical professionals and researchers advise that you can make your overall health better.

Our main topic is our fourth All-Questions Show! We take a trip through our backlog of questions, ranging from telling a non-fur partner about being furry to how to handle getting possessions back from exes who do not feel they have to return them. Several of these questions are longer and, as always, we invite you to offer your feedback and offer your own take, especially if you think we missed the mark.

We close out the show with some feedback on our Drugs and Alcohol show and how to go about doing drugs in as safe a fashion as possible.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion on radical honesty. We look at a Buzzfeed video where couples experiment with being totally honest with one another and, after cutting through the crap of the video, talk about ways you can implement some of the ideas they have in your own life and relationships.

Our main topic is on drugs and alcohol. Within the fandom there is a heavy focus on individuals being inebriated or high, and many such activities are praised or sought after as being inclusive in the fandom as a whole. We talk about why this is not optimal for your life or for relationships, how drugs and alcohol have impacted our life (positively and negatively), and offer some advice to new members of the fandom. 

It's important to note that if you struggle with substance abuse, please seek help as soon as possible.

We close out this week's show with a question whether it is a good idea to re-establish a friendship with a former partner who might still be carrying a torch for you. Should you proceed with caution, or snuff out that flame?

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion of good BDSM Aftercare techniques. We look at an Oh Joy Sex Toy comic that goes over different ways you can help prevent SubDrop (and DomDrop), as well as an explanation as to basic BDSM terminology.

Our main topic is on Oral Sex. For episode 69 we invite guest host Koji Fox back onto the show to help us on an adventure of self discovery, dick sucking, labia licking, sexploration. We go over tips, techniques, and ways to improve your oral game. 

We close out this week's show with a question on being emotionally available and ready for an open relationship.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

On this weeks episode we open with a discussion on rape culture. A recent article nods to the fear of false rape accusations as being a reason why millennials are having less sex. We discuss, and Metriko steps on his words a bit, at the top of the show. 

Our main topic is on disclosure. We go over the primary reasons and ways to disclose information, whether it's infidelities, diseases, or bad credit. Failure to disclose is, oftentimes, one of the reasons relationships fail. We discuss this, as well as ways we have failed at disclosure, so you can avoid relationship anxieties from this area.

We close out the show with a question from someone in an open relationship. He wants a more poly-style relationship, but his partner is hesitant. What should he do?

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week with a discussion on disclosure when dating. A recent study shows that sexual stimuli inspire people to be more vulnerable and forthcoming on themselves and their desires and interests in a partner when it comes to dating and long-term relationships. We discuss this phenomenon and go through why sex may not be as bad on a first date.

Our main topic is a discussion on Sexuality and Gender Expression with Debra Soh! Debra is a sex researcher and neuroscientist who writes a weekly column for Playboy and has been published in several other outlets, from Scientific American to the LA Times to the Globe and Mail. You can read a separate interview that Debra had in Quillette earlier this year if you are further interested in her background and areas of focus.

As a sexologist, Debra focuses on why people have the sexual interests they have and if there is cause, neurologically, for there to be a predisposition (or even if these paraphilias are hard-wired into the brain). She discusses recent research and findings in these areas, as well as whether this can be applied to gender identity. We also discuss some of the more taboo paraphilias, including "cub" attraction within the fandom. 

Debra invites all listeners that have questions for her, or if you want to keep up with her recent publications, to visit her Twitter page, @debra_soh. We would like to thank Debra for coming on and sharing her expertise in this. 

We close out the show a question from a listener who is in a long distance relationship with someone who is entirely incompatible in physical appearance, fetishes, and sexual roles. Do two tops make a bottom, or should the listener break up? Debra helps us out on this involved question.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode. 

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's episode with a discussion on monogamy and polyamory. We look at an article recently published on CNN's website that discusses polyamory in a mostly positive light. We go over the highlights, the minor issues, and why articles like this are important in the long run.

Our main topic this week is the conclusion of our series on shame. We talk about the common missteps and conflicts that can prohibit you from finding true independence from a shameful existence, like fear of abandonment or betrayal. We then get to the light at the end of the tunnel and go over the steps and actions you must take in order to live a life of genuine self-validation, and how to communicate with your current partners about the path that you feel you must take.

We close out the show with a question on long distance relationships and cheating. Our questioner's boyfriend claims that his multiple-personality-disorder is causing him to have an affair, and the questioner wants to know if this passes our smell test.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

On this week's episode Metriko is alone as Viro was stuck on an airplane that wouldn't leave thanks to a few tornadoes. Viro made it to Furry Weekend Atlanta and will be back for next week's episode. With that in mind, this episode is slightly more personal and an intimate discussion with Metriko, so please enjoy!

We open this week with a discussion on sex in America. Studies are showing that we are having less sex now than we were in 1989: could this be due to stress and working more in this shitty economy? Is Netflix and chill a lie and used solely for marketing (seriously though it's only $9.99). We look at why social media might be impacting your sex life.

Our main topic is on shame. Last week we discussed what happens when you grow up with shame and choose to keep that subject secret and hidden from others. This week we discuss what happens when you reveal that shame and live life "openly". Metriko talks about his life when he was outed and how that was not the end of his quest for validation, and what it took for him to realize that he was living a lie. We go on a journey together to discover what it's really for.

We close out the show with some feedback from Snares (one of our friends and Patrons)! He wants to know how our response from the Playboy article was, and if it contrasts at all with the feedback he got when he was interviewed for an article himself! Check out the show notes for a link to his interview. Metriko speaks for the show and reminds everyone that if you would like to have us appear in your publication to get into contact with us.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

On this week's show we open with a discussion on our recent article in Playboy. We go over some of the feedback we've received, explain some of our thoughts on the complaints, and explain why we agreed to give an interview in the first place in as least of a flippant fashion as possible. We also go over some feedback from last week's episode and add in a comic that was published by Oh Joy Sex Toy! which discusses Pup Play in comic format. We totally forgot to mention that-- our bad!

Our main topic is on shame. We talk about what shame actually is, how it forms in you as an individual, and what it can do to your life if left unchecked. The first in a three part episode series, this is a personal episode about us as hosts and you as a listener. Let's journey together as we work collectively to undo our faults. 

We close out the show with a question on sexual intimacy. How can someone have a dick too sensitive to touch but not sensitive enough from penetrative sex to cum? Is there something wrong with him, or is he doomed to never pleasing a sexual partner ever.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

On this week's show we open with a discussion on five different theories as to why we get jealous in non-monogamous relationships. We go over theories from Freud to Labriola and get to the root to what we personally think on Feral Attraction and why jealousy might not be as bad as we make it out to be.

Our main topic is on Pups and Handlers. We bring on friend of the show Pup Powder to talk about his experience with the pup community. He delves into various areas, like who the pup community is right for, what to look for (and look out for), various terms used within the pup community, and addresses why the pup community gets along so well with the furry fandom. He also talks about Rubbout and why it's awesome.

We close out the show with some Feedback on how much Metriko talks in an episode and a question on reconciling polyamory with Christianity (or any religion, really). 

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

On this week’s show we open with a discussion on sex-positivity and Orthodox religions. We look at an interview with an Orthodox Jewish couple who lead a double life: religious adherents by day, polyamorous couple by night. We discuss our opinions on their story and ways that it might be dangerous as an example for others.

Our main topic is on Calming Your Emotions. Dialectical Behavioral Therapy is the joining of Behavioral Therapy, Mindful Meditation, and Stoicism, three areas we have previously discussed. We go over the four pillars of Dialectical Behavioral Therapy and discuss ways that you can employ these skills in your life to enhance your relationships with yourself and other people.

We close out the show with a question on coming out to your family as bisexual. How do you tell your family that you are bisexual, want to move away, and also are a furry? Better yet- should you tell your family? We discuss the positives and negatives of both options.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion on how polyamory helps some people love being married. While some people view polyamory and marriage as being mutually exclusive, we look at an article on how polyamory has opened the door to love and longing in a marriage and how to overcome fear and trepidation at saying the things you are most afraid to say. 

Our main topic is on accepting love as a damaged individual. Within the fandom (and especially the LGBTQ+ community) many people face hardships and abuse. Perhaps it is a parent who hates that you are trans*. Perhaps it is a mate who acts in an abusive fashion. Maybe it is a lifetime of feeling rejected, or not belonging. It could be that you have depression or anxiety issues. Regardless, plenty of people feel that they are too broken, or they have too much baggage, to accept love from anyone or anything.

We go over ways to overcome this mindset and to help you as an individual reintegrate within the vast, beautiful kaleidoscope that is love and accepting love. We talk about our own lives, and ways that we overcame (and still work on overcoming) our inner saboteur. It's a heartfelt episode and one of our most requested topics. 

We close out the show with a question on finding love and friendship when you're shy. Yes, we said there were two questions but, as it turns out, the second question is more involved and we wanted to give it its own space and time to truly dive into. Enjoy the minor gaffe (and later explanation) on this: it's a great episode.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion on a survey that tries to answer the question of what queer singles are looking for. We look into some data to show just how queer singles find dates, how open they are about their sexuality and preferences, and what their views on long term relationship commitments are.

Our main topic is on roleplay. As one of our most commonly received questions we wanted to dedicate a show to roleplay etiquette. How do you find an online roleplay partner? What if you're looking for a roleplay partner in meatspace? What are some things to look out for? How do you roleplay responsibly? We go over these, as well as the general dos and do-nots of role play to make you a more well rounded play partner.

We close out the show with a question on how to know if you’re losing interest in a mate. In long distance relationships how sustainable is New Relationship Energy, and how can you cultivate intimacy digitally?

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion on STIs in New York City. Over the past three decades STIs have been on the rise while funding has remained stagnant. We look at factors as to why and ask the ultimate question: why is sexual health not considered to be recession proof?

Our main topic is on handling arguments at conventions. We discuss the common arguments, causes for arguments, and ways to avoid arguing with loved ones at conventions. We also approach the topic of former lovers, jilted exes, and friends who might have issues with you and how to handle confrontation (or even break ups) while at one of the most public of venues we as a fandom encounter.

We close out this week's show with a question on how to handle rejection. In a search for Mister Right, how can you handle being told no repeatedly or being matched with guys that just are not compatible? Should the expectations be adjusted, or is it perhaps too narrow a net is being cast? We discuss realism, optimism, and pessimism and how to appropriately set expectations.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion on workplace discrimination and sexuality-based pay gaps. In the past research was done on a binary approach (heterosexuals versus non-heterosexuals). Now that more data is in, we can dive in and see which group in the LGB community (still not enough information for Trans*/NB individuals quite yet) make the most-- and least-- money. If this were other websites, we would inform you that number five will surprise you.

Our main topic is on Commissioning Art. With this being the day after Valentine's Day, we wanted to tackle a lighter, more fandom related topic, and one of the more common questions we receive is what is the best etiquette to practice when commissioning art of your character (and perhaps of other people's characters). We go through a quick checklist of things to look out for, points about copyright law, and steps that commissioners and artists alike can take to ensure the goodwill continues to be fostered in the fandom.

We close with a question on how to make friends if you are older than most other furries and also might have physical impairments you might be self-conscious about.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

Before we get into the content of this show, we want to advise you that this episode contains discussions on abuse (emotional, physical, and sexual). If you are sensitive to such discussions we caution you against listening to this episode. Please consider listening to a show from our library, or hugging someone, or waiting until next week to listen to our next episode. Thank you for your consideration! 

We open this week's show with a discussion on mouth wash and gonorrhea. While gingivitis and bad breath are the standard enemies of Listerine, is it possible that your daily hygiene regimen can mitigate against the spread of an STI?

Our main topic is on sex and romance after assault. As individuals who have gone through various forms of abuse, we open up about our experiences, our healing process, and ways that we were able to grow and learn to love ourselves (and others) after the fact. This is a rough subject, and a heavy episode-- however it is an important episode and we encourage you to listen. 

We close out this week with a question on suicidal mates and the burden of support. How can you support a suicidal partner, and what should you do if you no longer feel you can offer that support.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion on poppers and eyesight damage. No, we're not talking about jalapeño poppers, but the kind of poppers you huff (if you huff jalapeño poppers please let us know). Known as VCR Cleaner, Tape Cleaner, or Leather Cleaner, this is a commonly encountered additive to sex that many people enjoy, and it is not well researched in terms of consequences to your long-term health. We look at one investigation that links damage to your vision to the usage of poppers and add another reason to consider carefully your choice to include them in your play.

Our main topic is on rebuilding trust in a relationship after a betrayal, cheating, or a rule violation. Relationships are never perfect and mistakes happen, but how to move beyond that mistake is not often discussed and it is consistently one of our more commonly asked questions. We look into this area of relationship healing and offer advice to both the offender and the hurt, as well as provide looks into our lives when we have been put on either side of this situation.

We close out this week's show with a discussion on love. What is love? Am I in love? What's love got to do with it? These are questions that singers and sages have asked for years but have yet to provide an answer. We hope to help one of our listeners figure out whether or not they are in love with their best friend and, if so, should they pop the question. 

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

On this week’s show we open with a discussion on whether or not apps like Tinder or Grindr have changed what people consider the “right” number of sexual partners when considering you as a potential mate. We look at an article in Playboy by Debra Soh that delves into the Goldilocks-zone of sexual partners.

Our main topic is on Self-Care during Jealousy, and Breakups. In relationships, whether monogamous or polyamorous, closed or open, we are all bound to experience bouts of jealousy. We discuss tips and tools to employ to help get over your jealousy in a relationship to ensure that you handle yourself in a healthy, non-violent fashion. We also look at the end of a relationship and how to take care of yourself and promote closure and moving forward when you go through a breakup.

We close out the show with a question on how to approach a friend who has fallen in love with you. Should you ask them whether or not they like you or like-like you, or is it best to say nothing in an attempt to maintain the current relationship status quo?

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

On this week’s show we open with a discussion about a recent study on whether or not testing for herpes should be included in the standard STD panel. We look into research and advisements that show that testing for herpes on a regular basis may not be as effective, despite the best of intentions.

Our topic today is our third all questions show! We take a trip through our backlog of questions, ranging from fitness to long distance relationships to dating friends. Several of these questions are longer and, as always, we invite you to offer your feedback on the questions and offer advice of your own, especially if you think we missed something or got it wrong.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

On this week’s show we open with a discussion on how to deal with haters. We go back over the idea of reactions versus responses, emotional retorts versus reason, and the school of stoic philosophy. This also applies to how one can handle rejection, whether it's for a friend, for a

Our main topic is on crushes. We go over how to handle having a crush, being crushed on, and how to determine whether to move forward into a relationship or let the flame fizzle out. In the furry fandom, and in the world at large, we often get the idea that having a crush must mean that a relationship needs to happen, or oftentimes confusing love for limerence. We discuss how to differentiate between the two, how to let people down easily, and how to be graceful when you are rejected by a crush. 

We close out with a question on BDSM anxiety: a young sub wants to get involved in BDSM but is afraid that they won't find someone closer to their age or someone who will treat them nice. We unpack this question and offer some advice on how to treat your elders in any community. 

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion on how self-control is just you empathizing with your future self. We look at an article that discusses your brain (with words that Metriko barely can pronounce) and how empathy and self-control are merely two sides of the same coin. It's an interesting lead in because-

Our main topic is commitment vs. autonomy in a relationship. As a relationship develops and becomes long-term, partners often struggle with balancing how to maintain their independence without sacrificing intimacy in the relationship. We discuss the definitions, pitfalls, and tribulations that are often encountered in such encounters, and ways that you can work to help stabilize your relationship. It's a real romp of a topic and one to get 2017 off with a running start!

Our closing question is from a bisexual guy who has issues emotionally connecting with ladies and problems performing anal sex with men. Is he doomed to be a straight player or is this just latent homophobia? We unpack this question and offer some less accusatory answers to his questions.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion of foxes in male/male furry pornography. Are foxes at the top of the list of bottoms, or are we all going to yiff in hell for eternity?

Our main topic is not a topic at all: it's questions! We decide to close out the year with a series of questions about love over distance, jealousy, sexual assault, and how to keep a fuck buddy a fuck buddy. 

This is a more conversational, lighthearted episode, however we do discuss some serious topic and would like to issue a general content warning over a question that could contain a recounting of sexual assault. If you find you are sensitive to such matters, please use your own discretion when listening to this episode. 

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

We at Feral Attraction thank you for joining us this year, and we look forward to 2017. It is our hope that your new year is filled with laughter and, more importantly, love.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion of Milo Yiannopoulos, the University of Wisconsin-Madison, and covert transphobia. We address who Milo is, why hate speech is not necessarily free speech, and why people responding to hateful speech is not a case of being sensitive. Free speech is one of the tenants that many countries hold near and dear to the rights of their citizens, however most people feel that makes you free from criticism. We also address covert transphobia, virtue signaling, and why the Chancellor of UWM is a shitbag.

Our main topic is on Fairness versus Equality. We discuss the balance of responsibilities, wants, needs, and desires in a relationship and how to make sure that everyone is contributing and benefitting in as positive a fashion as possible. Many people try to make their relationships equal, in time spent together, finances and bills being paid, and responsibilities being distributed across the board. We recommend replacing your idea of equality to equity, and build your relationship on that more stable platform on a journey to fairness. We go over common struggles encountered in relationships that attempt equality over equity, and how to make changes to help stabilize your relationship.

We close this week's show with a question on whether it's fair for a man to be the receptive partner in sexual activities more than his boyfriend is. We discuss equity, needs and wants, and sex charts.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion on how Sex Addiction should not be considered a mental disorder. We look at Debra Soh's article in Playboy Magazine on how the science and support of individuals who have hypersexual libidos has shifted and should continue to shift in the future. 

Our main topic is on Sex Drive Mismatches. We've spoken about this in previous Advice Articles, however we wanted to devote a show to this topic as we frequently receive questions concerning this area. We redux our previous article and talk about what to do if you have a lower sex drive (like Metriko), a higher sex drive (like Viro), and ways you can reconcile the two and move forward in your relationship in an ethical, open and honest way. 

We close out this week with a question from someone who is attracted to twinks, but no matter how hard he tries he just can't seem to get twinks to like him back. We talk about monoliths, hivemind, and rounding up to one.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion on why polyamory (or open relationships, really) are not for everyone. We discuss a YouTube Video which goes through this discussion in a fun, informative way, and we think that if you enjoy the show you would enjoy the video. Give it a watch after the show HERE.

Our main topic is on Pack Houses. We break down why that might be the wrong question to ask, as well as detail just what a communal house is, how they are structured, and how you can cohabitate in an intentional community. One of the most commonly asked questions of the show is how can one find a polyamorous house to live in, and we address why pack houses are less a random roommate on Craigslist and actually a relationship that you are entering.

We close out the show with two questions: one on BDSM Anxiety and the other on Long Distance Polyamory.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well.

We open this week on a serious note. As many are aware there was a tragic accident within the Pup community this past week that took the life of one of its most sex positive, fun, outgoing members. We were faced with a dilemma on how to approach this, as we wanted to address the dangers of self breathplay (autoerotic asphyxiation) without shaming or causing additional pain for those whose lives he touched. It's an important topic, and one that we would be remiss to not discuss, so we attempt to do so as delicately as possible. 

What's important, in moments like these, is that we do not equate the individual to the mistake and, instead, celebrate the positivity and light that they shared with us. It's important that we educate others off of the mistake made, and continue the legacy they started of being open, honest, kink friendly, and a mentor and friend to many. It is in this spirit that we discuss auto-erotic asphyxiation and the inherent dangers as our top of the show. 

We did not use names, as we did not want to cause additional grief for others. It is our hope that we did this properly and, if you feel otherwise, we invite you to contact us with your feedback. This is a Pup who will be missed by many, including ourselves. May we all continue to spread their legacy to all we encounter on a daily basis.

Our main topic is on explaining relationships to family. During this holiday season many will have the unique position of "coming out" to their parents, whether it's as a member of the LGBTQ+ community, or as an individual in a poly relationship. We discuss how to prepare yourself for this, how to handle the ongoing conversations that might be started, and how to move forward once you've opened the dialogue. 

Our question for the week focuses on this main topic-- how do you handle a family member who does not want you telling other people about your relationship because they are afraid it will cause gossip or damage the reputation of the family?

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well.

We open this week with a discussion on how to have the best headspace for making important decisions in your life. All too often we make choices in our life when we're in an emotional state (breaking up when you're having an argument, agreeing to plans when you're in a good mood, etc...) that end up backfiring on us. We discuss some research on how to make the best, rational decisions for yourself and your life. Remember-- never go grocery shopping on an empty stomach!

Our main topic is on monogamy. While Feral Attraction exists primarily as a podcast to detain non-traditional and non-monogamous relationships and lifestyles, monogamy is still the relationship style of choice for much of the public. While the furry fandom might be uniquely enriched with individuals exploring alternatives to monogamy, we did want to dedicate an episode to monogamy as it does carry its own unique challenges and difficulties to prosper.

We discuss the benefits of monogamy and why many people choose (or never deviate from the cultural norm) to be monogamous. We also discuss some of the challenges and pitfalls that people who are monogamous might experience, both in their relationships in general and in the fandom at large. 

We also have two questions this week, one on whether or not it's a good idea to invite a third into the bedroom, and another on what to do if you find yourself falling for your Master/Dom/Domme in a D/s relationship. Buckle in-- it's a long ride this week with Metriko and Viro! 

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

On this week’s show we open with a discussion on the recent presidential election in the United States. Our apologies-- this segment ran for much longer but we will be continuing this discussion in a separate show from the podcast. 

Our main topic is on Dating and Spirituality. Many people struggle to balance religion and relationships, especially when non-monogamous. Within the furry fandom we are enriched with individuals who are atheist, agnostic, or otherwise reject a spiritual path. That being said, there are plenty of furries who are religious or otherwise spiritual, and finding a balance in a relationship between partners of varying religious backgrounds can be trying. In this episode we invite on Leo Lion, who is Christian, to discuss methods to bridge that gap and to come to find loving, healthy relationships.

We close out the show with two questions on loud sex and jealousy in relationships. Should you be loud as the hell you want when making love? When getting to know a new partner in an open or polyamorous relationship, should you do that one on one or in a group setting? 

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion on an article that asks the question: which makes you more fulfilled-- making money or having free time? We look into the pros and cons of both, as well as an explanation of opportunity cost. 

Our main topic is on Success. Last week we spoke about Discipline; this week we go over what Success is and how to define it. As you require Discipline for Success, this is part two of an odd episode pairing. We discuss ways to determine success in life, love, and in general. In the face of the recent US Election, this episode might be more necessary than we thought.

We close out our episode with two questions on Long Distance Relationships.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion on how small lies can set the stage for major betrayals. It becomes easier with each lie to make an even bigger lie-- we look at some research behind this, what it means for you, and what it could mean for people within the LGBTQ+ community who lie as part of remaining in the closet.

Our main topic is on Motivation versus Discipline. Many people within the fandom struggle with motivation issues, whether they are artists, authors, or even hosts of a podcast. We discuss why motivation is not what you should be working towards and how to develop self-discipline, which will allow for you to be happy to work, not work to be happy. This is part one of a two part episode, concluding next week with our discussion on what Success is.

We close out this week's show with questions on how to find a pack of your own, and fuckbuddy struggles.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion on ways to make your polyamorous relationship more sustainable. When couples make the switch from a monogamous to a polyamorous relationship, many face feelings of fear, jealousy, and anger. We discuss an article written by one such individual and the ways that he and his partners worked through those feelings to find relationship stability and bliss.

Our main topic is on empathy. Much like our previous episode on Envy versus Jealousy, many people often use sympathy and empathy interchangeably. We discuss the differences between the two before diving into why empathy matters in your life and your relationship. Empathy forms one of the core foundations upon which a relationship stands-- too much and you find yourself burning out, too little and your partner might seek elsewhere to find emotional support. We look into how you can use empathy in a way to resolve conflicts in a non-violent fashion, and how empathy can reinforce your emotional boundaries and integrity. We also discuss the levels of empathy that we experience and ways that we have had to either raise or lower that level to keep our relationship going. 

We close this week with a question about the appropriate speed one should explore their sexual interests, especially if they are experiencing their "gay teens" later on in life. We talk safety, responsibility, and how to keep Grindr from becoming more important than your friends. 

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

Thank you for your patience this week as we worked around technical difficulties to produce this episode. 

We open this week's show with a discussion on HIV disclosure and witch hunts. Should you "name and shame" people on the internet that you believe are not disclosing their status with their potential partners? We look into why this might be more counterproductive than it might appear at face value. 

Our main topic is on Locker Room Talk. What is Locker Room Talk, and why is Donald Trump using it as an excuse for his language? We give a history of the term and go into how it differs from dirty talk and when it is and is not appropriate. We also call Donald Trump a douchebag for trying to disguise sexual assault as "boys being boys". 

Our question this week asks how to tell your best friend that you're in love with them. It's a topic that hits close to home for most people- your hosts included. We go into the possible outcomes and the best way to minimize the risk of losing your connection if the feelings are not mutual.  

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

On this week's show we open with a discussion of an article Debra Soh wrote on common misconceptions people make about polyamorous relationships. We use science to debunk mistakes: it's almost as if one of the hosts is a scientist! 

Our main topic is on Boundaries versus Rules (featuring Ultimatums). We go into the differences between these ideas, why they are not interchangeable, and why you might need to change how you think about your relationship terms. 

We close out the show with a Patreon shoutout to Snares (seriously go and give money to this comic), a reminder to see our episode of Culturally F'd!, and a question on changing the expectations of a poly relationship when locations and living circumstances change. 

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

This week we open with a discussion on weddings and divorce. While the majority of weddings- at least in the USA- take place in the month of June, do divorces follow a seasonal trend? We look into why that might be the case and some research behind seasonal divorce.

Our main topic is on Maintaining the Spark. When you are in a long-term relationship it can often be difficult to keep a relationship feeling fresh and exciting. We discuss why that is, define some terminology, and give steps on how to approach and avoid a lack-luster long-term relationship. 

We close out the week with a question on whether it is appropriate to downplay mistakes you've made in a relationship. Sharpen your pitchforks and light your torches, we're disagreeing with some common wisdom here!

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion on how BDSM participants might have the right idea in combatting victim shaming and defeating rape culture. Turns out, we're not heartless monsters!

Our main topic is a six panel question show! We go through six of our listener questions and address them at length! With this, hopefully our backlog will stop being a scary, terrifying thing.

We address questions ranging from fitting into the fandom to finding a mate when you're a 30 year old virgin. There's even some Wet and Messy inquiries as well- we help clean up the mess of confusion and will hopefully shed some light on these topics.

We close with some feedback on silicone toys and how to care for them.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

On this week's show we open with a discussion on whether or not your friends actually like you. In the day and age of social media how many of your friends are actually friends?

Our main topic is on sex toys! Join Metriko and Viro on a whirlwind tour of sex toys, from butt plugs to strap ons, what to look for, and what you should avoid. Try not to blush as you listen!

We close out with a series of questions from our backlog and some feedback on integrating sex toys into your bedroom with a partner.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

On this week's show we open with a discussion on a study that shows how altruism might impact your sex habits and overall attractiveness? Will this be the final study to put Ayn Rand out of business?

Our main topic is on Jealousy and Envy. While we have discussed these in the past, a lot of questions we have received focus on differentiating between the two and how you can work to resolve these emotions in a relationship. We talk about the differences, the ways to identify them, and how you can work within your relationship to bring them to a positive conclusion. 

We have some questions from our backlog that we address, and we close with some feedback on our Being Your Own Filter episode. 

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

Next week we will be discussing Jealousy and Envy. We hope you enjoy this bonus content!

Be well

We open this week's show with a discussion on how your activity on Facebook (and potentially other Social Media) might be a reflection of your true self and what might be happening when your online persona differs drastically from your meatspace reality. 

Our main topic is on being your own filter. The idea of content warnings and trigger warnings have been a discussion now for several years. Unfortunately, there seems to be a disconnect where individuals are equating offense to a trigger, which can limit the ability to communicate honestly and openly. We talk about the important of discussion and how to approach individuals you find offensive, or how to handle topics you take offense to. 

Our question is on transphobia- our questioner is a cisgendered gay man who is being called transphobic for not wanting a relationship with a transwoman. 

We also have some feedback on other ways you might be able to send yourself sex toys without your parents at home opening them by accident. 

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion on whether or not money makes a relationship happier and longer lasting. We go through a Chinese study to find a possible answer to whether or not money can buy love and happiness. 

Our main topic is on financial responsibility. Your hosts, with guest RhythmFox, discuss different issues that you might encounter in your life, from difficulty setting a budget, attending a convention in a fiscally responsible way, or learning the difference between a national bank and a credit union. We talk about our lives and how we've made mistakes in the hopes that you can avoid doing the same yourself.

We close with a question on how to handle being in a relationship where you're supporting a mate who does not seem motivated to find work of their own.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's show with a discussion of how one in ten youth in Britain reports a distressing sexual problem in recent times. Is Brexit anxiety to blame, or could it be a far more simpler explanation? 

Our main topic is on setting Healthy Expectations. Many people in life struggle with setting healthy expectations and this can impact how they find others to date, enter into relationships, or even their day to day decisions and ideas. Your hosts open up about our lives, our struggles, and why there is a car circling Metriko's house. 

We have a question about sexual agency and whether you can deny someone sex if they don't show you their latest STI testing results. We also have some feedback on last week's show and whether or not we can address Anal Sex from a top's perspective.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open this week's super show with a discussion about whether or not having sex is a determining factor in your relationship's success. Does frequent sex lead to a deeper, more meaningful relationship? We answer this with science.

Our main topic is on Anal Sex. Many individuals across every gender and sexual preference spectrum imaginable have asked us on how to have anal in a way that is pleasurable and accessible. This episode is geared towards beginners to anal sex-- maybe you're a straight male interested in getting pegged for the first time, or you're a female who just really enjoys the idea of anal but have no idea how to get started. We demystify this with the help of our resident bottom, Koji! This episode is long, for sure, but well worth it the ride (that's what he said).

We have a series of questions, ranging from questions about anal to questions about relationships in a pack house. It's a panel of questions you don't want to miss!

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open today's show with a discussion on why millennials are having less sex. We also ask the question: are furries really millennials and why does it seem we buck this trend?

Our main topic is on hookup apps. Regardless of your gender or orientation, there is a hookup app that caters to your wants, needs, and desires. We discuss some of the more common apps, the common pitfalls and dangers of using hookup apps, and what you can do to ensure you have as positive an experience as possible.

Our question focuses on sexuality, BDSM, and therapy: how to find a kink positive therapist and whether enjoying being dominated by another man makes you less straight. 

We have some feedback on our opening discussion last week, and we close with an apology for the audio quality for the week. Next week our studios will be completed and the audio quality should return to a good level. Thank you again for your patience and understanding!

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

On tonight's show we open with a discussion about what happens when a sex-positive comic goes, perhaps, a bit sex-negative. We discuss anecdotal reactions to fursuiting sex, Metriko mispronounced Dr. Nuka's IRL name (sorry about that), and we discuss how furries and non-furs view pornographic material within the fandom. Watch that space.

Our main topic is on how to find a mate. Last week we discussed how to be Single and Happy. This week, we address the idea that not everyone wants to be single. We go over what you should do for yourself, various resources that exist for dating within the fandom, and how to keep your head up in the face of rejection.

We close out with a question on whether you should look up a date's social media on the internet before meeting them before the first time. Could this be our first disagreement?

Please note that this episode does have slightly different audio quality due to a cross-country move and setting up new studios. We are working on improvements and ensuring that Metriko's whistling s's don't kill your eardrums in the future, and we appreciate your patience and hope you enjoy the episode nonetheless!

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, Be Well!

On tonight's show we talk about how gender-stereotypical genes might play a large role in your attraction towards others in life. Viro talks about a recent study that might show how the stereotypes of gender affect interpersonal attraction. We also point out the problem areas in the study and why this is not yet a universal truth.

Our main topic is on how to be single and happy. For some, it can be difficult to attain both at the same time. We discuss ways and methods you can employ to achieve both without ignoring the fact that you are, in fact, not currently in a relationship. A lot of the methods can play a part even when you are in a relationship, especially if your partner(s) are long distance or prone to travelling often.

Our question this week is on how to handle your feelings of affection, romance, and sexual desire toward a roommate that may not be reciprocated. If you have had sex before you moved into an apartment with someone as a roommate, how do you handle a potential cooling off that might occur.

We have feedback on sounding advice and why, perhaps, our sound advice was a bit unsound. Confused? Sir Arcane, co-host of A Hairy Prone Companion and the President of the Lansing Pups and Handlers, takes us to school. 

We also would like to remind everyone to check out our appearance on the Alter Ego podcast. We talk with Athena, the host of the show, about fursonas, why we're furries, and what the fandom means to us. It's a great show and you should give it a listen.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

On tonight's show we open with a discussion on how women who are cheated on might win in the long run. While some might say the true victory is not being hitched with a cheating asshole, is it possible that the long-term effects of being cheated on might outweigh the short-term pain?

Our main topic is on resilience. Resilience is the quality to recover quickly from periods of difficulty and strain in your life, and it is a tool that many people lack as it is not innate but learned. Unfortunately, too many people equate resilience with being overly stoic, where you adopt a poker face and never have moments of vulnerability or weakness. In much the same way that bravery is standing in moments of fear, resilience is standing in moments of weakness. We discuss how to become more resilient, the benefits of resiliency, and why all of this is important for your relationships. 

We move on to a listener question on the friend zone. How can you stop being the best friend and become the boyfriend? (Spoiler: the friend zone is a myth). We discuss ways that you can exert your emotional bandwidth and employ direct, sensible communication. We also trash pick up artists a bit and make fun of negging.  

We close out the show with some feedback on whether or not the show should have opposing viewpoints and whether or not we, as hosts, exist in an echo chamber that is howling into the faceless void.

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open our show with our Anthrocon interview with Nuka, from the International Anthropomorphic Research Program. It's about 25 minutes long and super fascinating and touches on topics ranging from Gender, Sexuality, and Relationships in the furry fandom. If you would like to read a transcript, please refer to our Transcript in our Advice Column. Thanks again, Nuka, and we look forward to your upcoming papers!

Our main topic is on Body Image and Self-Love. This can be an incredibly difficult area for a lot of people, especially furries. We get told that we are either too thin, too fat, too muscular, or in some cases too short or tall to take seriously. While furry has been able to fetishize a lot of what makes us different and our bodies unique, when it comes to interactions in person there can be a lot of self-consciousness about how we look. 

A lot of people find they are not their 'ideal' body size, and for some they struggle to change this. As a podcast with someone who is chubby, someone who was once chubby, and someone who has been told is too thin, we wanted to express how you can love yourself regardless of the size. We go into the health side, the mental side, and ways you can work to lose weight, gain weight, and stand tall when people make fun of you for your size. 

As always, we are not medical professionals and, before embarking on a health adventure, take the time to consult a doctor to ensure your plan will be sustainable for you. Also, you're amazing, no matter your size, shape, or anything else. 

We close out the show with a question on pet play, polyamory, and the renegotiation period in a D/s relationship. What can a pup do when they struggle with jealousy?

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open tonight's episode with a discussion about the Pope. Why does everyone seem to like this Pope, and what exactly did he mean when he told reporters that Christians should apologize? We rely on Viro, our resident recovering Catholic, to break the secret code and tell us why we should care, or if this is just false hope from the Pope!

Our main topic is on how to Live For Yourself. Really, though, this episode is about the power of telling other people to fuck off. As you can imagine, this episode contains adult language, so enjoy. 

We discuss various strategies you can employ to ensure that people stop having control over your life and, really, why should you care what that stranger on the bus thinks about you? We talk science, philosophy, and butts on this exciting, casual episode of self-empowerment and profanity!

Our listener question for the week is about whether you can be polyamorous but only want to have sexual contact with your primary. We talk a bit about non sexual significant others and what that can mean for you! 

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open tonight's show with a discussion of whether BDSM power exchange relationships are valid or are simply a sign of mental illness. We reference some of our own advice columns in this discussion, as well as a discussion that took place on Twitter in which we were attacked for our position on this matter. 

This was a personal topic for us on the show, as Metriko has been in several relationships centered around D/s, and Viro and Koji are in a long-term committed relationship with heavy D/s mechanics negotiated and in play. We discuss the situation in depth, what we can glean from it, and how to discuss relationship styles you may not agree with. 

Our main topic is on our own personal take on D/s relationships: How do we personally identify in the D/s scheme of things, and what do we find works and does not work for long-term happiness. We also address some stray questions and offer some clarifications on topics or terms we might have glossed over previously in this month.

We close out the show with a listener question that asks whether you can be in a successful bisexual polyamorous relationship. The questioner identifies as pansexual and genderblind, and is doubtful as to whether or not this type of arrangement would be successful for them. This is also our first question via audio recording, so that's pretty awesome too!

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open tonight's show with a discussion about what virtual sex might be in the future. Is it possible that the furry fandom might be getting how to roleplay right, or are we doomed to yiff in cyber hell for eternity?

Our main topic is on how to translate online kinks (or kinky fantasies) into real life activity and play. Many furries struggle with finding a healthy balance between play and pretend, and while having fantasies is both incredibly healthy and normal, sometimes it can be difficult to incorporate your kinky fantasies into your everyday sex life.

How can you differentiate between a realistic and unrealistic kink, how can you adapt the more unrealistic kinks (like vore, macro/micro, and inflation), and how can you back away from a kink you mentally enjoy but are turned off by in meatspace?

We close out the show with a listener question about how to handle an odd predicament in their D/s relationship. They have a pet who also has a pet who also happens to be the listener's Master. Confused? So are they, and they want to know if this is acceptable, how to proceed in an ethical fashion, and if this makes them poly. 

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open tonight's show with a discussion of a hotel owner who spied on his tenants for over thirty years. He recorded information concerning their sexual activity, sent this to someone who wrote for the New Yorker as "research data," and slowly grew more and more cynical toward those he was spying on. Was he a sex researcher or was he an unethical voyeur? (Spoiler, he was an unethical voyeur)

Our main topic is on common roles that individuals take on while participating in BDSM. Last week we discussed negotiating a BDSM / power exchange relationship contract. Tonight we talk about the different roles that you might find yourself in, whether that is as a Dominant or a submissive. While this is not an exhaustive list and you might find yourself wearing multiple hats (or, perhaps in the case of BDSM, multiple hoods), this gives a good idea of what might interest you if you are looking to get into BDSM or a power exchange dynamic.

We close out with a question on how to bring up the topic of the furry fandom to a new partner who is not furry. What are some ways you can gauge their interest or views on the fandom without perhaps giving away the fact that you are a member? 

There is also some feedback on the usage of labels on the show. Is there a need to apply labels to everything, or is that just shoving people into a box that has preconceived notions and, perhaps, negative connotations? 

It's a show full of labels and laughs as we demystify the common roles in BDSM!

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open tonight's show with a discussion of whether or not you should go on witch hunts to expose underaged furries. What potential ethical and legal issues might arise if you dox an underage fur, and what responsibility do you have when you discover an underaged fur is posting or consuming adult content? As always, we are not lawyers and this does not constitute legal advice!

Our main topic concerns how to negotiate power exchange relationships. What exactly is a power exchange dynamic, should you ever rush into one, what should your relationship terms look like, and what should you expect from each party in such a relationship?

We close out the episode with a question about how to negotiate with a monogamous partner when you are polyamorous and also in existing power exchange relationships. 

For more information, including a list of topics, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We open tonight's show with a discussion of a recent scientific paper about what scientists currently know about sexual orientation and identity. It's a fairly long read (60+ pages), so we rely on Viro giving us a breakdown and going through the relevant portions. It's almost like Viro is a PhD Science Collie...

Our main topic is an introduction to kink, and, to a lesser extent, an introduction to Kink Month. We wanted to set the stage for the following episodes by going over commonly used terms and defining them — as we have said numerous times, it's important for everyone to be on the same page when discussing sexual activities. 

The furry fandom is enriched in media that portrays various kinks, whether that's artwork, stories, or even videos of fursuiters engaging in various forms of play. As perhaps the only fandom that exists without a pre-existing narrative or established universe, for many furries the sexual content is their primary focus and involvement. For other furries they would rather not acknowledge that this portion of the fandom exists. 

As a community, it's important to understand how to share our sexual interests in a way that is healthy and appropriate for the context and location the discussion is occurring in. As individuals, it's important for us to learn how to communicate our likes and dislikes to our sexual partners in order to meet everyone's wants and needs and to ensure that no boundaries are crossed without enthusiastic consent. We discuss this and how to be more open minded about kinks you had either previously never expressed interest in or believe yourself to not be interested in.

We then talk about some of the most common kinks in the furry fandom. This is in no way scientific (and we pulled our information from a brief f-list search), but it helps to show just how diverse and enriched the fandom is in kink. Resources like F-List are great for communicating your sexual kinks and enjoyments for online roleplay, but if you plan on taking your online play partners on in the real world, ensure that they know which kinks are for online enjoyment only and, perhaps, consider creating a separate profile that lists your real world kinks and fetishes as they apply. We also have a brief introduction on BDSM, which we will discuss in greater depth next week.

We close out the show with a question about someone who has "literal feral attraction". We discuss our impending lawsuit for violating our brand and also whether or not fantasies should become realities.

For more information, including a list of topics by timestamp, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

On tonight's episode we open with a discussion of a scientific study that shows how HIV can prematurely age the cells in your body by 5 years, according to one measure. Viro puts his PhD to use and gives a breakdown of what that means.

Our main topic is social anxiety — what is social anxiety, is it healthy or unhealthy, and what are ways you can reduce its effects and treat it? We answer these questions as well as give examples from our own lives of how we have overcome severe social anxiety issues and learned to embrace our own shortcomings.

This episode closes out our mental health month and we hope that you have been able to learn valuable tools with which to improve yourself and, in turn, your relationships as a whole. Remember: If you can't love yourself how in the hell can you love somebody else? (Thanks RuPaul!)

We end with a question on how to tell someone in an open relationship that you are only interested in their partner. Viro gives examples from his own life and Metriko talks about what happens when you don't talk about these things (hint: it's bad). 

For more information, including a list of topics by timestamp, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

On this week's podcast we open with a discussion on why you might be experiencing poor sleep when you are in a new environment. Is it just anxiety, excitement, or could it be a more primal, feral sensation that your brain is having?

Our main topic is Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and Cognitive Distortions. We discuss what the most common cognitive distortions are and how they can affect the way that you perceive the world, as well as interfere with your relationships. We then discuss ways that you can manage these distortions and find a path to a happier, healthier you. 

Cognitive Distortions are a serious issue, especially when you put them in play into a relationship. They allow for negative, self-sabotaging behavior to rear its ugly head and the collateral damage can be incredibly great. While we discuss common methods for coping and resolving these issues, we do want to stress that we are not licensed mental health experts; this podcast does not represent any form of consultation or diagnosis. If you have further questions or want to come up with an action plan for correcting behaviors we discuss in this show, seek help from a licensed professional that specializes in this area.

We close out the episode with a question about how to tell your long-term monogamous partner that you want to give polyamory a try. We talk about communication a lot in our answer.

For more information, including a list of topics by timestamp, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

On this week's podcast we open with a discussion on Twitter lists that propagate libelous information. How should you handle a situation when someone is falsely accusing you of doing something potentially illegal?

Our main topic is gaslighting. Gaslighting is when someone maliciously attempts to convince you that your perception of an event is false in order to manipulate you. This can take the form of calling you crazy, saying that you are wrong about something, or making you doubt your own memories. Oftentimes, this method is employed by people close to you, such as a partner, a parent, a teacher, or a boss.

If you are susceptible to these types of suggestions it can be incredibly damaging to your psyche. We discuss how to identify gaslighting and distinguish it from a genuine misunderstanding, then describe ways to defend yourself against gaslighting, including what to do when you realize that you are being gaslit. 

We also answer a listener question about how to tell a partner that you are in love with them, and how to challenge the gender norms that the man in a relationship has to be the first one to offer such a confession. What can a lesbian do?

We end with some feedback concerning our show and the bias that we, as hosts, have as (mostly) gay men. Are we intentionally excluding other genders or relationship styles when we offer advice?

For more information, including a list of topics by timestamp, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

We begin this week's podcast with a discussion on "ghosting" furry conventions: What exactly is ghosting, what are the ethics of con attendance, and who is ghosting really hurting (spoiler: everyone).

For our main topic this week, we kick off our Mental Health Month by talking about emotional blackmail. We here at Feral Attraction believe that emotional blackmail can be one of the most insidious poisons in a relationship, and as we have mentioned it in the past, we wanted to dedicate an entire episode to it.

Emotional blackmail can take many forms, and everyone is vulnerable to it — whether you are the child of a passive aggressive parent, or the dom in your D/s relationship. The good news is that there are warning signs of emotional blackmail that you can look out for, and ways to de-escalate and resolve these situations without them turning into a relationship cold war. 

We do discuss some topics relating to abuse and self-harm in this episode, so please be advised of this content. We also would like to reiterate that if you find yourself in an abusive relationship, please seek the appropriate level of care and assistance to get you safely out of that situation.

After our main topic, we take a listener question that is in response to our STI Prevention and Risk Mitigation episode, pertaining to anxiety after being informed of a partner's STI status. Though the asker understands the low risk associated with his partner's STI, he is still a bit nervous when it comes to having a full-blown sex life with his partner. What should he do?

Finally, we close the show with some feedback in which a listener shares resources that may be helpful to the non-monogamous community, focusing on one of our favorite books, More Than Two.

For more information, including a list of topics by timestamp, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

This week we lead off with a discussion about a recent study showing that DNA may influence your sex life. Check out the Show Notes for a link to the study.

Our main topic is about communication. What different styles are there and what are the pros and cons of each? Healthy communication in a relationship is what nourishes the love that grows. Developing communication skills and habits can be incredibly difficult, especially if you grew up in an environment that did not foster such growth. We discuss all of this, as well as how to identify and avoid the pitfalls of communication styles and how to work with your partner to ensure that there are fewer misunderstandings in your relationship. 

We also have a listener question about what to do if you are involuntarily celibate. This can have a long-lasting impact on the health and well being of an individual and, for some, it is a real struggle. 

For more information, including a list of topics by timestamp, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

This week we lead off with a clip of our Second Opinion segment from Episode 495 of the Savage Lovecast, "Furries and Cheeseheads." Thanks again to Dan Savage and his producer Nancy Hartunian for the gracious invitation as well as granting permission to share the clip in full. 

Our main topic is about trust, which is all too often misunderstood. Trust is the other side of Integrity, and both serve as the foundation on which a relationship either stands firm or crumbles. We discuss what exactly trust is as well as how to develop and maintain trust in yourself and others. We also discuss how to handle breaches of trust and what you can do to recover trust once it has been broken. Spoiler: sometimes that just isn't possible. 

We also take a listener question about how to handle feelings of jealousy in an open relationship that you realized, after the fact, you wished was a closed relationship. 

For more information, including a list of topics by timestamp, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

This week we talk about Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs). This is a long episode-- over three hours-- that is full of as much information that we could cram in. 

We go over the ways to mitigate against STIs by using safer sex practices like condoms, and then take a look into the most commonly transmitted STIs. We discuss the transmission routes, the symptoms, the treatments, and the ways you can mitigate specifically against each one. We discuss studies and reports and offer a lot of resources that you can find in our Show Notes for this episode-- it is highly recommended that you give them a look. You can also use this to skip to sections that interest you or perhaps you are curious about.

Unfortunately we are not able to cover every piece of information available in this episode, but we do recommend using this as a resource for having a discussion with your doctor about your sexual health. We also hope that this can serve as a resource to help correct some of the misinformation that is sometimes shared in Public Education Sexual Education classes. 

We also have a listener question about how to find a mate, especially if it has been some time since you were last in a relationship.

For more information, including a list of topics by timestamp, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

This week we talk about After Dark Twitter, the whys, the hows, and the what not to dos. 

AD Twitter can be a great place for you to engage yourself -- and others -- in kinks, fetishes, and roleplay and can expand your sexual wheelhouse. That being said, there is a social contract involved when you engage in this type of activity, both as a "producer" and a "consumer". 

We discuss how to interact with people in a way that portrays you in a good light and allows you to embrace the fun, sexy side of the fandom. We also talk about the risks and ways to mitigate your naked body becoming a public attraction.

We also have a listener question about how to move on after the end of a possibly unhealthy relationship. 

For more information, including a list of topics by timestamp, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

This week we go into the past and talk about our lives. What mistakes in life and relationships have we made, and how did we move forward from these negative situations? How have we handled some of the lowest moments of our life and what did we learn from this? 

We also take a question about whether or not you should sacrifice your relationship for employment.

Please note that this episode contains some sensitive material and covers some topics that some listeners might view as being disturbing. Please review our show notes for timestamps in order to prevent any emotional or mental issues that you might experience. 

For more information, including a list of topics by timestamp, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!

Online Relationships and Long Distance Relationships (LDRs) have become a staple of the fandom due to our massive presence online. Most furries will, at one point or another, enter into some kind of a relationship that is non-local. 

How do you begin such a relationship, or maintain it once it is underway? What is the difference between an Online Relationship and a Long Distance Relationship? How do you set reasonable expectations for the relationship? What is the best way to keep intimacy regular when you might be continents apart? 

We also answer the question of whether you need a primary partner in order to be polyamorous. 

For more information, including a list of topics by timestamp, see our Show Notes for this episode.

Thanks and, as always, be well!