Poopelini Pages

Thomas the Train screamathon

2010-09-11T11:09:00.000-07:00

Today Toys R Us touted a Thomas (the train) playdate, and it sounded great, "storytime, games, special offers and coloring fun"! Sure, I know damn well that I will end up buying the kids a train of some sort, but for my Thomas fanatics, I'd be willing to do that. We were all excited and planned to get there early to ensure that we would be there before the craziness. As we pulled up to the Western Ave. location in Chicago, I was pleased to see that there was ample parking, and we would therefore have an enjoyable time since we had beat the crowds, so we rushed in the store to find...

Two helpless Toys R Us employees that seemed intimidated by the throngs of screaming children who were vying to play on the GAME (singular, not games as stated), and the "game" is the train table with oh...6 trains on there. What is that a 6:1 child to train ratio? Kids were screaming, crying, parents were stressed, disappointed, wanting to flee, and the employees? Ensuring everyone was signed up for the birthday club (because that has what to do with Thomas?). When I asked them if there was anything else, she showed me a little packet of sticker? poster? who knows, she just picked it up and put it back on the table, and showed me that she had a book, but the kids were out of control, so...? She just shrugged her shoulder.

Oh and the special offers? On the large table sets, or if you buy a $40 set, you get the second one half off. Imagine that, I get to spend $60, now isn't that special?! I believe the single trains may have been on sale, but since I arrived 15 minutes into the screamathon all of the lower priced Thomas items were no longer in stock.

Many other parents were turned off, as I was, by this faux-vent, after all an employee with a conductor hat and copies of a coloring page with crayons on a card table next to the train table (which is normally there anyway), does not an event or playdate make.

Toys R Us, if you would like any input on how to put together a successful playdate, I'm happy to help, or can recommend someone to you, otherwise, I'm sticking to my online shopping.

Let them be girls!

2010-08-26T19:45:00.000-07:00

It amazes me that despite the fact that we all want the best for our kids, that we worry about body image with our daughters, eating right, etc., yet I have yet to see anyone comment on the fact that little girls clothes are basically womens clothes, worse yet, hoochie mama clothes...but smaller.

Perhaps I'm not reading or in touch with the right people, but really, as a mother of a 4 year old girl, that practically bought her nothing when she hit size 6 because it seems that everything was too revealing or too grown up. Ok, not everything but damn near everything. Seriously, I practically stopped buying her clothes. Why would a 4 year old, or even a 9 year old need a backless halter? Or a shirt with faux necklaces? Or a faux wrap that accentuates their...bosom!?!? Really, what the hell are we allowing kids clothing manufacturers to tell our little girls? We move a step forward with campaigns embracing all body type's like Dove's, but then manufacturers are creating little girls clothes that I would not wear, nor do I plan to let my daughter wear at age 18, and I'll be damned if I'm getting it for her now.

Here's the disclaimer, I'm not a prude, I love fashion (seriously, high end editorial nothing's practical you better be a size 0 fashion), I want to look nice, and I want my daughter to look nice, be comfortable, but I want her to look like A GIRL! I don't want any free fucking lip gloss with her $70 shoes! I don't want anything off the shoulder! In a day and age where I worry about human trafficking, sexual predators, pedophiles and crazies in general, plus the fact that she is tall for her age, I DON'T NEED MY CHILD TO LOOK ANY OLDER THAN SHE IS.

There is plenty of time for fights over mini-skirts and ripped jeans and too tight or too suggestive clothes, that's called her teen years. I'm not going to deprive myself of that rite of passage by dressing her up as a totstitute?! If I embrace it and teach her to embrace it now, what am I going to complain about later? Ladies, speak out on this subject and let your voices count. LET LITTLE GIRLS LOOK LIKE LITTLE GIRLS!

If anyone knows of any group that speaks to this subject, please let me know!!

Days like this

2010-08-24T06:29:00.000-07:00

I am driving to Milwaukee today for a trade show, and then tomorrow I leave with the kids to visit my family, so time is tight, I am exhausted and then there are days like today. Somehow, someway I've always noticed that the more imperative it is that I get sleep, the more I can count on the fact that one of my children will prevent that from happening. Be it a cold, the impromptu ear infection, or frankly, no reason at all, they will make sure mommy gets no sleep.

Now, I am exhausted and I don't want to see them or talk to them because every fucking noise, breathing, the keyboard clacking, is annoying. Then I look at my poor sleep deprived children and I want to cry, until they start running through the house (apartment, we are city dwellers, and I actually like my neighbors!) and I turn into the evil voiced super over enunciating witch. I am too fucking old to run on three hours sleep, it makes me crazy!! Fuuuuuck! Now instead of doing all the things I have to do for tonight and tomorrow, and being the sharp cookie I normally am (ha!) I am now sitting zombie-like, the kids are fending for themselves and I'm venting (thanks for listening by the way). And at the crux of the problem is the fact that my 2yo DOES NOT SLEEP!! He used to sleep, but about a month (or two, who know? I'm sleep deprived!) ago he stopped taking naps with me, he only sleeps with the sitter, so his nighttime sleep is all fucked up, his eyes are red and bloodshot, he is exhausted, and even when he gets his nap, he's getting up at 5am so no matter how you slice it, my poor son is sleep deprived and I want to scream, POBRECITO!!

In conclusion, I better go make some coffee and get a move on, and thanks again for listening.

Dear blogger mamas...how do you do it?!?

2010-08-18T14:14:00.000-07:00

Admittedly, I'm new (very new, as in just learning how to get a clue, new), but I've been checking you out, and you have amazing sites, have time to exercise, travel, have babies, raise the babies, update your content continually, have an intricate on-line society (thank you to all who have welcomed me, you are dolls!), are funny, well informed, so, HOW DO YOU DO IT?

Do you sleep? When was the last time you turned on your TV? Have I wandered into the land of Stepford Mommy Bloggers? I have to tell you that I am equally impressed, as I am jealous, but I'm more impressed.

So this post is really a plea for help, insight and perhaps a virtual hug, because right now I feel like I'm out of my league and out of my mind, but I am learning a lot and meeting some of you (who again, are dolls!) and others (who are not such dolls, but dammit your content is good), and I'm looking forward to learning more.

Ladies, you have created an online world as open and warm as a mothers embrace, as intense as a bridal gown sale, and as competitive as a beauty pageant. You've put large corporations on check, have put your foot down and given them that motherly look that let's them know they better listen. I ♥ it!!!

Kudos you kick ass mother $%#%^!!!! You rock!

Someone should have told us!

2010-08-17T20:58:00.000-07:00

We had some new neighbors move in a while back and they had a pet rabbit. My 2 and 4 year olds went crazy, it was instant love for this quiet furball, and I fell under the spell as well thinking, hmmm, I don't have to walk it, I can keep it contained from time to time...it's perfect! The neighbor told me how long they've had the bunny, that he sleeps with one of the kids (not happening in my home), etc., etc. Fast forward a couple of months and her bunny is pregnant! At this point our pet beta is ranking low with the kids, and I'm thinking we're getting a bunny for free, yay me! So welcome Ollie Bunny (named by my daughter after a Wonder Pets character).

Ollie is loud, rambunctious (I can't believe I spelled that right on the first try!), isn't really interested in us as a whole, much less the kids but will fake it for a carrot. I go online and try to learn a bit about their care in my free time (ok, so I looked at a page of info), but I thought since I'd had a long conversation with the neighbor on care, he'd be fine, well, Ollie died. Apparently bunnies have a VERY delicate digestive track. They have to have a very strict diet consisting mostly of hay, or else...

It was sad. It was costly to try to save him. It was my 4 yo's introduction to death.

Fast forward a couple of months to...surprise!!! Our nanny, who had fallen in love with Ollie Bunny brought us...ANOTHER BUNNY! Welcome Fuzzy Bunny! Fuzzy is a cute little bunny, with the sweetest disposition. He sits on my daughter's lap, let's me hold him like a baybe. Will sit beside you so that you can pet him easily. Once, my daughter's on the ground, my son climbs on her and the bunny climbed on him! It was hilarious! Fuzzy Bunny is the perfect bunny. Having learned from my mistake and taking life pretty serious (no matter how many legs you have), I was VERY careful with Fuzzy Bunny laying down the diet and exercise law.

This morning, Fuzzy Bunny passed away. It was very sudden and sad. The vet assured me that there was nothing I could have done to prevent his passing, basically BUNNIES ARE VERY DELICATE CREATURES. I had to leave the kids in the exam room at the vets for a moment so she could speak to me because I was devastated. The vet and I were both crying. It was bad. Eventually I pulled it together, for the kids sake, but NO MORE BUNNIES!! I can't take it! And it concerns me that my kids will think that these things are disposable!

Later, after I was calm and after a nice lunch watching the symphony rehearsal at the park, my daughter and I were talking about Fuzzy Bunny dying, and I told her I was very sad. Her response, "Why? Can't you think about him? I have him right here." as she points to her forehead. Thanks doll for helping mama cope.

I understand...

2010-08-11T11:36:00.000-07:00

Wait!! Before you go calling Child Protective Services, get down off your soapbox and your idealisms and LET'S GET REAL.

Background: I am very traditional when it comes to parenting and family life. I am Cuban-Colombian and was raised in a highly traditional home a-la "old school". Time out's didn't exist, the bottom was created for spanking, and we got spanked "cantando" where the spanks coincide with the syllables.

Now, I will restate this, my husband and I decided as a unit that we would not spank our kids (ages 4 & 2). Thankfully we have been able to stick to this. There are loved ones that we know who believe in spanking, and that's their prerogative. That's their child. Yes, there are studies and data showing that spanking only makes for a more violent child, but not everyone believes everything they read. Then there's the old adage, "My parents spanked me and I turned out ok", but really that can be applied to anything, just change the word spanked to abandoned, traumatized, loved, hated, spoiled, whatever, with the exceptions of the Ted Bundy's of the world "ok" is a pretty safe catch-all.

Is it obvious at this point that I don't want my kids to turn out "ok"? I try to educate myself, I pray, I drink, I take "calmantes", just to that my kids are under the impression that they have a level headed mother...and then my daughter turned 4...

She is a smart girl, and she know how to push mommy's crazy button, and I haven't been able to figure out how to disable that damn thing. So when I'm being "calm" and speaking to her clearly and slowly (like the crazed maniac she can be) and she is doing this hoppy, flip-floppy fish dance, whining, faux-crying and making other noises likened to hyperventilating, I COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND what would drive a parent to turn their little monster around and slap them on the butt. Since I don't partake, I instead try distraction, conversation, separation, threats, rescinding of privileges, and then I turn into the you-wanna-see-mommy-mad-well-you-did-it-now banshee.

Hey, I said I didn't spank, I didn't say I was perfect!! LOL!!!

Fear not the brush!

2010-07-09T19:09:00.000-07:00

Or the concealer, or the hairdryer. Seriously ladies, I know we're all busy and have far too much on our plates, but love thyself. I see women everyday that would look, and feel, so much better if they just brushed their hair! How can it be that we've gone from the fabulous world of flapper girls to the bleck world of sweats? I am the first to admit that looks are not everything, after all I'm no beauty queen, but I am a glamour puss, and you could be too! Think of me as the stranger that tells you there's toilet paper on your shoe. You're a little embarrassed, wonder why your friends didn't bother to mention it, but grateful somebody said something.

Let's be frank. There is no such thing as gender equality. There never will be. As far as I'm concerned some bitch burns her bra in the 60s and I'm stuck opening my own doors and carrying my bags?! Not to mention the fact that we work more than men, earn less, carry the home and raise the kids (manny's & stay-at-home dad's, all 5 of you, please excuse me). Although these things are a part of life that despite my best efforts I alone cannot change, I WILL NOT ALLOW ANYONE TO TAKE MY FEMININITY!

So, ladies...repeat after me:

I will not leave the house without some form of makeup (the amount of makeup increases with age, but a little concealer, lip gloss and mascara goes a long way)!
I will not wear sweats anywhere except the gym (seriously, have you looked at your ass in those things? And the sweats with words, no matter how much they cost, are no better)!
Uggs are fugly (need I say more).
I will at the very least put my hair in a ponytail (or do something that tells me I ♥ myself)
Heels are my friends.
If the butt sags in my pants, I will throw them away.
I will love the woman in me and by doing so, my daughter will also love herself.
I will not confuse being feminine and glamorous with being smart (these things actually go hand in hand, frankly it's hard for me to consider someone of no substance beautiful).
Glasses can be chic (embrace your thing, just do it with a little flair)
I will not let any man out-dress me (drag sistah's, I ♥ u, I learn a lot from you, but I'm the real deal)!
Just because it fits, or is in fashion DOES NOT MEAN IT'S FOR YOU (it's more important to look good than to be "hip", find the style that fits you!!)

You can do it. No one will laugh. Yes, significant others will wonder what's going on, but don't let that stop you. There are thousands of how-to makeup videos on you tube, the style network is about...style, and being broke is not an excuse, there's a lot of glam in thrift and discount stores. Try it for a week and you will see that the world will look at you with a little more respect, and that you will feel better, walk a little taller...and you may even learn how to sashay!

XOXO

How I ended up here

2010-06-22T19:53:00.000-07:00

The first time I tried to write this post, it ended up a rant, so I stepped away, breathed deeply and thought...three things I should do more often. Here's what I wanted to say...

After working full-time since I was 14, sometimes holding more than one job, I found myself laid-off and 9 months pregnant! Thankfully my husband is gainfully employed, but it took us a while to understand the financial impact my lack of work would have on us. Even worse, no one imagined the emotional toll it would take on me.

9 months pregnant, laid-off with a two year old was the scariest place a person who at age 12 imagined her adult life as a powerful business woman with a meditation room and a sparse, but chic loft, and after snapping out of my fugue, I found myself surrounded by piles of laundry, unpaid bills and cobwebs (both literally and figuratively). No one had noticed that I was just going through the motions.

I remember very clearly that one day I got up and said enough. Despite my endless job search and fruitless first and second interviews, I was still in my jammies, and I couldn't take it anymore. I had to get out of my house. So, I decided that even a part-time job would do. Thanks to Craigslist, I contacted everyone that had posted a job I could do and thankfully, I got a part time job that day. So what if it wasn't at the pale scale I was accustomed to, and it wasn't a full time job with all the mental challenges I so adored...it was forward momentum. I was a workaholic, lost in the land of diapers, dribble, dirty dishes. Although I love my children, I needed to work. Arriving to that realization was not difficult at all. The difficulty lies in how to balance my need to work, and my need to raise my children, and realizing that the reason I could not land a full-time job was that deep down, I didn't want one.

My husband, who secretly wished I would be a stay at home mom, watches me go through these changes as I try to figure out where the balance in my life lies, although balance may not be the right word since there's no formula and the key may be that certain areas of your life are imbalanced for short period of times. A balance that's even harder to find when you are culturally schizophrenic, as is the case with me. When it comes to my family, it's all about my Cuban/Colombian heritage - my kids, my rules, my home cooked meals, my home. When it comes to me, I'm all about my...male side, my time, my ambition, my results, my ego. Marrying these two sides has been challenging to say the least, but I'm learning that the key is to be flexible, forgiving and a little creative.

That's why I decided to become a marketing consultant, and the reason that I've (thankfully) been freelancing for almost two years now, because the thought of not seeing my children regularly, enjoying them, going through so many "firsts" with them really breaks my heart, I've decided to sacrifice in other areas. Gone are the days of weekly mani-pedi's, expensive haircuts and highlights, my show fetish, quarterly trips, fine dining at a whim, my daily Perrier and Starbucks habit, all the cable channels, etc., etc. I tried being the person that doesn't miss the finer things in life, living minimally, but that's just not me. I love luxury items! I love to pamper myself! But not at the cost of my family's security, so I'm learning how to live luxuriously, at a discounted rate, and how to grow my business steadily so that as my children grow, we can all move forward together.

One of the things that I do...

2010-06-11T18:40:00.000-07:00

One of the things that I do in an effort to keep my mind from atrophying and generating income is that I work as a personal assistant for an art curator a couple of days a week. It's frankly fascinating to be part of history. I don't know about you, but how many of you have stood witness to endless archives written by the hand of a great artist? The stories, the fights, the passion. Too bad I missed it all, and now I just type. But the curator is great. A very kind person, but not too kind, not a pushover, equal parts kind, generous, judgmental and demanding. Actually, very much like my parents!

I'm first generation American, and although I appreciate this country and the freedoms given to us (freedom of speech, individuality, etc), I also believe that many of these freedoms are "illusions" and that we get so caught up with the celebrity rags (no offense to them, but who cares what they wear? where they eat? I have bills to pay!!), with all the materialistic things waved endlessly in our faces that we don't realize what's really going on. Politics are "too confusing", our nation has the worst education system (most adults read at a 6th grade level), everything is dumbed-down because of the majority...the majority of what? Idiots? News is a joke, journalists are far and few between, all these freedoms and so few of us actually do anything worthwhile with them, myself included. Anyway, as 1st gen, I was raised to obey (in this order) God's law, my parent's laws and everything else, and although I hated it then, it taught me to work a little harder, to do a little better, to shake things off and as a parent I hope to do the same for my kids. Life isn't easy, but it sure can suck when you expect everything on a silver platter! Not that I don't enjoy perks every now and then - I was pulled over just the other day for running a red light and was given just a warning - and since it was an unexpected, but greatly appreciated perk, it really made my day!!

So the point of this blog?

The curator is cool (in an old school, respectable, learn from them way) and I am grateful to experience this chapter of my life.
We American's really need to make some fundamental changes.
I try not to take things for granted and teach my kids to appreciate things.

Now, is this how a blog is supposed to go? I have no idea, but it sure felt nice to get that all of my chest :)

Three years?!?!

2010-06-10T20:47:00.000-07:00

Three years have passed since I first started this blog and last posted...wow! Time really flies when you're out there living. Here I am all bottled up with no one to vent to (ok, no one that hasn't already heard my rants and raves) and here's my lonely little blog! How shameful!!

So...here's my story morning glory...

When I first posted, I had a 2yo, was working full time, and was thinking about #2. My then 2yo is now 4 (going on 30, when did preschoolers get so sassy!!), my then thought is now 2, I changed jobs, was laid off (when I was 8 months pregnant), was greatly depressed (combination of postpartum and not having a job for the first time since I was 14!), and I have hated and loved myself and my life passionately throughout it all.

Around me my uncle and mother-in-law have died, my brother struggles with his depression, and I struggle with wanting to help him and knowing that what I can do for him is greatly limited, we have tried to sell our place, we have had great tenants and nightmare tenants (people sux), my husband is no longer allowed to rent since "his" tenants historically are the most problematic ones, gangs have creeped into our neighborhood, and have magically disappeared (although I don't particularly believe in magic, so I keep my eyes peeled). Much more has happened, but not much more stands out in my mind right now.

And now? Professionally: I've taken the plunge into the hustle of a freelancer, as a result of the fact that I want to use my mind and want to raise my own children. Personally: I have been advised by my dr. to do something "fun" for 10 minutes every day, and am working on that. Motherly: I need to relax and breathe. Blogerly: I will try this out for a bit, as I have so many opinions, I cannot believe that I've remained quiet for so long!! So, stay tuned and find out what will happen next as the world turns (did I just date myself?)...

2007-09-25T17:21:00.000-07:00

So, did I mention that we were selling our home? And I'm pg? And I have a full time job? And I pump out approx. 17 meals a week? And I'm in charge of all aspects of our home? And I know that there are a hundred million super-women out there doing this - and more, but do they sleep? I mean really! I'm exhausted and if it wasn't for DVR I'd never watch tv (yes, I have mundane needs!). So somehow, someway I'm trying to figure out how to streamline and organize myself as best as I can, sell our home and find a new one, and get some sleep!

Here we go!

2007-09-21T07:33:00.000-07:00

Ok, here I am. My 1st blog. Hmmmm, where to start...well, hello me (and you if you're reading). I am a career gypsy who has somehow worked her way into being a mom (of a 20 month old), and am currently pregnant (again! Jesus!). I work, all the time it seems. But I have a job where I receive monetary compensation, then I am a mommy, a daughter of a highly needy mother, a wife of a cavemen (yes! they still exist), and somehow, someway, I still stive to be me (whatever that means).

What else...I love shoes (hello! who doesn't), I don't understand why there was an uproar and an impeachment trial over a blowjob yet there's a muderous jokel in the whitehouse for two terms and everyone seems ok with that, I think there is no such thing as common sense, and I love chocolate.

Other than that, I'm just a gal who wrote her 1st blog! Guau! (pronounced wow in spanglish)