tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-74643569471615464912026-09-06T04:58:56.615-05:00Regurgitating the stuff that time forgot--cult classics, lesser-known flicks and whatever else I feel like!Kitschensyngkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08674698892678213750noreply@blogger.comBlogger70125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7464356947161546491.post-9288386173827720462016-10-28T14:05:00.000-05:002016-10-28T14:05:52.309-05:00

This whole movie definitely illustrates one unshakable principle: never go to the South for any reason. -Crow T. Robot The "Deep South" trope, as I'm sure you recall, paints a rather uncultured picture of the southeastern portion of the United States as a largely rural area populated entirely by rednecks, Southern belles, Daisy Dukes, grizzled old moonshiners, fat corrupt sheriffs, Colonel

Kitschensyngkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08674698892678213750noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7464356947161546491.post-53752635544447651772015-02-28T12:36:00.000-06:002015-02-28T12:36:41.890-06:00

You've probably noticed by now that this blog hasn't updated in a while. And I deeply apologize for that. I did have a review lined up for January, but there was a problem with it that has faced so many others I've tried to do - since getting my current laptop in 2012, I have learned that certain DVDs of these films won't play on it so it's been quite difficult getting images of it to make funny

Kitschensyngkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08674698892678213750noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7464356947161546491.post-29382348083165610912014-12-23T11:43:00.000-06:002014-12-23T11:43:05.091-06:00

It was Christmas Eve. I was 9 years old. Me and Mom were decorating the tree, waiting for Dad to come home from work. A couple hours went by. Dad wasn't home. So Mom called the office. No answer. Christmas Day came and went, and still nothing. So the police began a search. Four or five days went by. Neither one of us could eat or sleep. Everything was falling apart. It was snowing outside. The

Kitschensyngkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08674698892678213750noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7464356947161546491.post-32587724391210144782014-11-30T21:44:00.000-06:002014-11-30T21:53:32.286-06:00

WE HAVE ALREADY SEEN:  HOT DISHES IN SPANDEX! THE OLD GUY WHO LIVES IN THEIR BASEMENT! HOLY DERIVATIVE! GOTH BATGIRL! THAT LADY FROM KINGDOM OF THE SPIDERS!  UHH...THIS GUY! BUT WAIT! THE WILDEST IS YET TO COME! Franchise reboots are tricky. The rules are essentially the same as remaking a movie - get it right and your work will be identified

Kitschensyngkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08674698892678213750noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7464356947161546491.post-8284321015832435052014-10-27T00:09:00.000-05:002014-10-27T00:09:27.302-05:00

THEY'RE COMING TO GET YOU, BARBARA... If you're looking for a monster who makes the perfect killing machine, who feasts on the living indiscriminately without heart, conscience or soul--you can't go wrong with Nazis. Oh, wait. That's video games. In the movie world, you can't go wrong with ZOMBIES. The living dead. The reanimated bodies of the deceased, ravenous, bloodthirsty, unthinking,

Kitschensyngkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08674698892678213750noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7464356947161546491.post-60144206918999916532014-09-10T21:46:00.000-05:002014-09-10T21:46:01.709-05:00

All the big things I should have done by now, but I was so busy doing little things. I wonder how many other people are out there? Writing stories and scripts that nobody else may ever read, making movies that nobody may ever see... discovering secrets, important things that could help everybody. Maybe I shouldn't make movies for a living... I could deliver Steve's pizzas... If we could

Kitschensyngkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08674698892678213750noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7464356947161546491.post-19601394061922459012014-07-19T19:37:00.001-05:002014-11-30T15:10:39.126-06:00

I hate Superman. The big showoff. I like monogrammed shirts as well as the next guy, but that big red 'S'? Superman? Heh. Anyone without a last name has gotta be a little weird. --Max Mencken The 1960s Batman TV series, it seems, is having a resurgence in popularity as of late. Not only did DC Comics launch a new Batman series last year that's based on the show as well as a new line of action

Kitschensyngkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08674698892678213750noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7464356947161546491.post-75740001553347424912014-06-28T01:32:00.000-05:002014-07-01T21:38:49.474-05:00

It is written among the limitless constellations of the celestial heavens, and in the depths of the emerald seas, and upon every grain of sand in the vast deserts, that the world which we see is an outward and visible dream of an inward and invisible reality. Once upon a time there was a golden city. In the center of the golden city, atop the tallest minaret, were three golden balls. The

Kitschensyngkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08674698892678213750noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7464356947161546491.post-38132800249680856442014-05-06T23:27:00.003-05:002014-05-06T23:27:36.741-05:00

Shoot a cop with a gun The Big Apple is plenty of fun Stab a priest with a fork And you'll spend your vacation in New York! Rob a bank, take a truck You can get here by stealing a buck This is bliss, it's a lark Honey, everyone's going to New York! No more Yankees Strike the word from your ears Play the roulette There's no more opera at the Met This is hell, this is fate But now this is your

Kitschensyngkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08674698892678213750noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7464356947161546491.post-80244113385482896412014-04-02T19:15:00.000-05:002014-07-06T21:10:16.776-05:00

Nothing surpasses the beauty and elegance of a bad idea. --Craig Bruce It has been a longstanding notion of mine that people were very easily entertained in the 1970s, as a majority of the popular culture I've seen from that time was seemingly made to accommodate the lowest of the lowest common denominator. Oh, sure, this was the decade that gave us "Stairway to Heaven", Farrah Fawcett, Fawlty

Kitschensyngkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08674698892678213750noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7464356947161546491.post-85266034347241385192014-02-28T17:21:00.000-06:002014-02-28T17:21:37.246-06:00

Caught in a future world, his only escape is back in time! --the tagline on the VHS cover, which is odd since the film doesn't mention time travel Why don't you "reconst" your "Flavo-Fibes"?! -Tom Servo Is it just me, or have I been getting a lot of movies telling me the world will suck in the future since I started this blog? Overdrawn at the Memory Bank is a 1983 TV movie filmed in

Kitschensyngkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08674698892678213750noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7464356947161546491.post-32689517328919512852013-12-23T11:23:00.001-06:002013-12-23T11:24:30.198-06:00

I hate the goody-goody feelings of Christmas! All this caring and sharing! So I kidnapped Grandma and made Santa Claus the fall guy so I could get all his money! Hey, I deserve to be rich. --Cousin Mel It seems with every holiday that comes along, there are always certain unanswered questions to go with them. Like, why do they call those little candy bars kids get trick-or-treating on

Kitschensyngkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08674698892678213750noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7464356947161546491.post-31211170543616244312013-11-25T09:00:00.000-06:002014-03-02T12:03:24.755-06:00

Rik: Hey, wouldn't it be amazing if all this money was real? Vyvyan: That is the single most predictable and BORING thing that anyone could ever say whilst playing Monopoly. --The Young Ones, "Boring" It seems like every time there's a national tragedy on the news like a school shooting, there's always some half-crazed, loudmouthed politician who is quick to blame violent TV shows and video

Kitschensyngkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08674698892678213750noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7464356947161546491.post-64717392968159903402013-10-28T15:53:00.001-05:002013-10-28T15:53:33.131-05:00

Apartment for rent. Acquire within... Well, I've done it. I've actually done it. I reviewed a Harry Potter movie. With wizards and magic and everything. Though it doesn't exactly take place at Hogwarts. (Though the castle in the title card looks like some branch campus. Or maybe the Hogwarts university hospital.) Yes, it's the 1986 cult classic Troll. Directed by John Carl

Kitschensyngkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08674698892678213750noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7464356947161546491.post-80209016353673026622013-08-30T15:25:00.000-05:002013-08-30T15:25:10.791-05:00

I've always been better at feeling out volcanoes than people and politics. --Pierce Brosnan's character Making a disaster movie is very simple. Step one: think up some stock characters of varying stock personalities. They can be any type of person you want, but try and include one or two children, someone in a position of power like an army sergeant, city mayor or president, and a scientist

Kitschensyngkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08674698892678213750noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7464356947161546491.post-1127858532505810842013-07-24T01:22:00.000-05:002016-02-19T20:57:01.128-06:00

Pathetic Earthlings...who will save you now? Flash Gordon is a product of the science-fiction/fantasy/adventure craze that hit the comic pages in the 1930s. Created by cartoonist Alex Raymond and first published by King Features on January 7, 1934, Flash Gordon was one of many comic adventure stories inspired by and created to compete against Buck Rogers in the 25th Century, but since

Kitschensyngkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08674698892678213750noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7464356947161546491.post-38513982641738812612013-06-19T18:23:00.000-05:002014-06-19T14:45:55.143-05:00

CASINO ROYALE is too much...for one James Bond! James Bond turned fifty last year. Though he hasn't even aged a day. After twenty-three movies, six actors and so many women I'm surprised he hasn't picked up at least one sexual disease, people still love him. Can't blame him, really. Good, bad or indifferent, there are so many awesome and memorable things to list from this long-running

Kitschensyngkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08674698892678213750noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7464356947161546491.post-64183784926308926772013-04-25T16:15:00.000-05:002013-04-25T16:15:34.102-05:00

Now everybody knows Mr. T don't lie And it ain't no fun just scrapin' by So if you want to be cool, just like me You better try real hard to be somebody! Return with us now to the dark days of the 1980s, where Reagan was king, communists were scum, and day-glo and leg warmers were acceptable fashion items to be seen in public wearing. It was also the dawn of the VHS era, where people would

Kitschensyngkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08674698892678213750noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7464356947161546491.post-46477980598669090172013-03-10T20:54:00.001-05:002013-03-10T21:18:39.854-05:00

Greetings, my friends. We are all interested in the future, for that is where you and I are going to spend the rest of our lives. And remember, my friends--future events such as these will affect you in the future. There are bad movies, and then there are bad movies. Some movies are made with the sole intent to cause physical and mental pain to its audience. Some movies are made by directors

Kitschensyngkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08674698892678213750noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7464356947161546491.post-17095613795053102592013-02-03T10:04:00.000-06:002013-02-03T10:06:41.057-06:00

You know America is backwards when Groundhog Day is a holiday and the Super Bowl isn't. --unknown source Today is Super Bowl Sunday. Today, millions of people across the country will gather around their TV sets to watch two of this season's best (or luckiest) NFL teams duke it out for the right to call themselves kings of the professional football mountain. If you're a football fan from a

Kitschensyngkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08674698892678213750noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7464356947161546491.post-83864529054466085652013-01-25T15:49:00.000-06:002013-01-25T15:51:01.235-06:00

Oldfather Studios, former home of the Centron Corporation. In 1947, University of Kansas alumni Russell Mosser and Arthur Wolf founded the Centron Corporation, a small Midwestern movie studio which specialized in making hygiene films that they used to show in classrooms to get kids to brush their teeth, keep clean and neat and avoid the dangers of communism. Based in my hometown of Lawrence,

Kitschensyngkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08674698892678213750noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7464356947161546491.post-86401380766892059022012-12-19T16:27:00.000-06:002012-12-19T16:27:29.267-06:00

The Prophecy has come to pass, that there would come to us a Chosen One, and that he, having no child of his own, would love all children everywhere, and that he himself would be an artisan, and a craftsman, and a skilled maker of toys. ... From this day on, now and forever, you will bring all our gifts to all the children in all the world, and all this to be done on Christmas Eve. ... The

Kitschensyngkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08674698892678213750noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7464356947161546491.post-87765122394204263522012-11-22T12:39:00.000-06:002014-04-04T23:16:16.868-05:00

I do invite my fellow citizens in every part of the United States…to set apart and observe the last Thursday of November next, as a day of Thanksgiving and Praise to our beneficent Father who dwelleth in the Heavens. And I recommend to them that while offering up the ascriptions justly due to Him for such singular deliverances and blessings, they do also, with humble penitence for our national

Kitschensyngkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08674698892678213750noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7464356947161546491.post-15380050274684718142012-10-20T14:12:00.001-05:002012-10-30T15:15:41.108-05:00

Fairy tales have always got to have something a bit scary for children--as long as you make them laugh as well. --Roald Dahl Ah yes. Roald Dahl. My and many a person's favorite children's author, whose books about chocolate factories, big friendly giants and telekinetic child prodigies have wowed readers for decades, and whose books have just as often been turned into feature films.

Kitschensyngkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08674698892678213750noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7464356947161546491.post-63860760010769697362012-10-02T01:14:00.000-05:002012-10-02T01:14:47.281-05:00

Dash it all, Nana, don't look at me like that. It's nothing personal, it's just that...well, you're not really a nurse at all, you're...well, a dog. And the children aren't puppies, they're people. And sooner or later, Nana, people have to grow up. --George Darling, Peter Pan The Black Hole was a milestone for the Walt Disney studio--it was their very first PG rated production. Fifty years

Kitschensyngkhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08674698892678213750noreply@blogger.com1