The author, CAPT (ret) Darlene Iskra, PhD, is a Navy Veteran.

If you have a comment, please post it on Time.

Watch this video of Liz Trotta of Fox News as she tried to make an argument against sexual assault prevention in the military. Correlating women in combat and levels of rape and sexual violence in the military are wholly inaccurate and inflammatory at best. When your blood stops boiling, read my response on Time Magazine.

If you have a comment, please post it on Time.

Read my article on Time.com Battleland Blog

This book, Paula’s first, has been three years in development with much of that time spent embedded with Petraeus’ and his staff in Afghanistan. In it she covers his career, his intellectual development as a soldier, scholar and diplomat, and his impact on the U.S. military.

For a little background about Paula, you might be interested in a piece I wrote titled “Paula Broadwell: Arc of a Driver” in March 2010 as she was completing work on the manuscript.

Read an excerpt from “All In: The Education of General David Petraeus” by Paula Broadwell with Washington Post staff writer Vernon Loeb.

Congratulations Paula! Well done.

US servicewomen are more likely to be sexually assaulted by a solider than they are likely to be killed in the line of fire. The new battlefield is the barracks.

The “The Invisible War”, a documentary film premiering at the 2012 Sundance Film Festival is an investigative and enraging emotional analysis of the epidemic of rape and sexual assault within the U.S. military. If the term “epidemic” seems strident or alarmist, the facts chillingly reveal that sexual assault and rape are prevalent and that the military justice system presently in place is an enabler that shockingly perpetuates the crime. It is not an abberration. The closed military justice system is a target rich environment for a sexual predator.

The 2010 Department of Defense Annual Report on Sexual Assault in the Military indicates that 3,158 cases were officially reported. A Department of Defense survey of active duty members revealed that only 13.5% of sexual assaults within the services were reported. The Pentagon itself estimates that more than 19,000 incidents of sexual assault actually occurred in 2010, not the 3,158 officially reported.

Read the full article “A Hidden Battlefield–Inside the Barracks” on Foreign Policy and The Best Defense, Tom Rick’s Daily Take on National Security.

The Invisible War Movie trailer

In both states and across the country, women represent 50% of the population, yet are severely underrepresented in elected office. Nationwide women represent less than 24% of state legislatures. With only 9.4% (16 of 170 seats) of women in elected state office, South Carolina is dead last in the country.

All politics are local

Community-based groups such as parent-teacher organizations, and church and civic groups are overwhelmingly led by women. Women tend to focus locally on solving problems be it building a new sidewalk or playground, raising money for after school programs or ensuring zoning ordinances are enforced. They get in, get it done and get out. With the welfare of most communities in the hands of women, why not consider putting the welfare of our states and our country in the hands of more women?

Women hold 70 of the 435 seats in the US Congress, just slightly more than 16%. A mere 17 women hold one of 100 seats in the US Senate. Since the establishment of the US Senate as a legislative body in 1789, there have been only 39 women elected to serve.

According to The Hickley Institute of Politics at the University of Utah and Dan Jones & Associates, while Utah women vote in greater numbers than men, only 25% of the GOP delegates and 45% of the democratic delegates are women. Right now only two of the 23 declared candidates for Utah’s four congressional races and one senate race are women.

Women voters are typically key to winning races in both Colorado and Utah. Candidates nationally are always courting the female vote. So why are we not courting the female candidate?

Women have long been underrepresented in elected office and political leadership. The current trend worries Katie Groke-Ellis, the Rocky Mountain Regional Director for The White House Project, a non-partisan group devoted to reversing the trend and bringing a woman to the Oval Office. “We have hit a plateau and are starting to lose ground,” she said.

During the 1970’s women gained ground on the national level. But in 2010, women lost representation. Currently, there are 12 women running for congressional and senate seats nationwide. If these candidates do not win, we will go backwards in terms of representation, Groke-Ellis remarked at “Real Women Run—Find Your Voice”, an all day boot camp for Utah women leaders interested in politics on Jan. 14, 2012.

The initiative, sponsored by The Hinckley Institute of Politics, YWCA Salt Lake City and Vision 2020, is intended to empower women to participate fully in public life and leadership through elected political office at all levels, political appointments, working on campaigns, or simply learning more about the political system.

Why women don’t run

The reasons women don’t run in the numbers men do are varied and entrenched. “They are not asked to run. They are not on the short-list when there’s an opening,” remarked Groke-Ellis.

Women don’t run for office because we do not think it is a necessity. The public perception is women are out there running for office and there is no equality problem. Just because Hillary, Michele and Sarah did it, does not demonstrate that there are enough women running. Statistics show that women win elections at the same rate as men, but actually few run.

Women have families. Yeah, so do men. This is not an excuse. This is the excuse men give for women not running. Women and men can do it with children.

It is hard to win an incumbent seat. This is the year to do it based on census and open seats.

According to a New York Times article, men wake up and say “I can be President.” Women say and believe they need to be an expert before running. Every president to date has shown us, you will learn along the way, you do not need to know everything.

Data shows that men tend to run for the title and women tend to run to solve a problem. Think about the issues that are important to your neighbor, your school district, your community and your country. It is easier to leave politics to someone else. If you don’t run, who will?

While few people truly enjoy fundraising, money is not one of the leading reasons women don’t run. But it is one of the challenges.

Gender stereotypes still play a role in the decision women make to run. Both male and female voters are much more judgmental about the appearance and style of a female candidate than of a male candidate. Although all candidates are judged to some degree on these attributes, women face greater challenges in convincing voters to judge them on their experiences and merits rather than on their looks.

The media perpetuates these stereotypes. Deedee Corradini, former mayor of Salt Lake City joked Saturday, “We must be making some progress, because people are now talking about Mitt Romeny’s hair.”

In sharp contrast to the long fight for women’s suffrage nationally, the vote came to Utah women in 1870, 50 years before the 19th Amendment was ratified giving women the full right to vote in federal elections.

The Rutgers University Center for American Women in Politics reports on a global level, the US ranks 71st in the number of women elected to office—behind Greece, Kazakhstan, and Venezuela. Rwanda leads the world.

Great Britain and Germany–two of the three most important nations in the European Union–have had women leaders (Thatcher and Merkel, respectively). According to Organization for Security and Cooperation in Europe (OSCE), member European nations average 22.3% with respect to women political representation.

If not now, when?

With only 11% of Americans approving of how Congress is handling its job, according to a new CNN/ORC International poll released Monday, it is time for women to get into the political game and get it done.

In field after field it has been demonstrated that women bring an additional and valuable perspective to the table.

Prominent research groups, including the center for American Women and Politics at Rutgers University, The Women & Politics Institute at American University, Catalyst and Harvard Business Review have long studied and noted “that women tend to include diverse viewpoints in decision making, have a broader conception of public policy, and are also more likely to work through differences to form coalitions, complete objectives, and bring disenfranchised communities to the table.”

“In short, ensuring that women move into leadership alongside men is not a women’s issue, nor is it a trivial concern compared with the massive problems we face on a national and global scale. Increasing women’s leadership is an imperative. Advancing women serves us all — men and women, businesses and institutions alike.”

The White House Projects reports that “the public currently believes that women — even more than men — have what it takes to be leaders in today’s world, according to a 2008 Pew Research Center study. In that study, the public rated women above men in five of the eight character traits they value highly in their leaders (honesty, intelligence, creativity, outgoingness, compassion) and equal to men in two others (hardworking, ambition). Men rated higher (by 10% more respondents) in only one trait— decisiveness. Overall 69 % of those surveyed thought women and men would make equally good leaders.”

Ensuring that November 6, 2012, election day, is positive at the polls, for women and for our country, please consider running for elected office. RUN—it is not to late. The filling deadlines for most states is mid march. Check the Federal Election Commission website to be sure.

If not you, than who?

There is never a “good time” and we will all come up with a million excuses. Now is the time to make your voice heard. Now is the time to get in the race.

Retired Air Force Gen. Lester L. Lyles, commission chair, said the recommendation is one way the congressionally mandated body suggests the military can get more qualified women into its more-senior leadership ranks. “We know that [the exclusion] hinders women from promotion,” Lyles said in an interview with American Forces Press Service. “We want to take away all the hindrances and cultural biases” in promotions.

Written in 1994 combat exclusion policy, precludes women from being “assigned” to ground combat units, but women have for years served in ground combat situations by serving in units deemed “attached” to ground units, Lyles said. That distinction keeps them from being recognized for their ground combat experience — recognition that would enhance their chances for promotion, he said.

In mid-November Rowan Scarborough of the Washington Times reported that top defense officials are wrestling to find a collective position on whether to allow women in direct ground combat.  This seems to be a never-ending, perpetually debated and continually unresolved issue.

Read  the article at “Now that the gay thing is resolved, can we let soldiers be openly female in combat” on Foreign Policy and The Best Defense, Tom Rick’s Daily Take on National Security

This is the 25th installment in the Honored Role Series.”

Nancy Reagan once said, “I think a woman gets more if she acts feminine.” That may be true for many of aspects of life and professional endeavors but does this theory hold up in the Army?

During the last few months I read several pieces about masculinity and femininity in the workplace. Many emphasize the unique attributes and skills women and men bring to teams. Often men are associated with the traits of confidence, assertiveness, and aggressiveness, and women with collaboration, empathy, social sensitivity, and self-abnegation.

In the June 2011 issue of Harvard Business Review, a fascinating piece of research adds new information to the discussion about gender, judgment, teamwork, and group behavior. “What Makes A Team Smarter? More Women” by Professors Anita Woolley and Thomas Malone, report that the collective intelligence of work teams rise when more women are added. They found that the group’s collective intelligence has more to do with team dynamics than the sum of the individual brainpower of its members.

Contradiction

It is bit of a catch-22 for servicewomen, commented one Army colonel and psychologist. Femininity is often only associated with physicality. If a woman demonstrates confidence, assertiveness and aggressiveness and keeps her hair short, she is labeled as “too masculine” and is judged harshly and critically. Yet, the opposite is true if you take pride in your appearance and employ the traits that are naturally feminine, you are labeled as “too girly”. Women are frequently judged on their appearance prior to be evaluated on competence and intellect. It is a balancing act.

During her plebe or freshman year at West Point, Cadet Nina Barnhart broke one of the institution’s regulations—drinking alcohol during a field trip. Although 22 at the time and above the legal drinking age, West Point imposes restrictions on when and where cadets can drink. While Nina understood she had done wrong, what she was told made a lasting impression. “The officer in charge of the trip told me ‘there is a different set of standards for male and female cadets going to bars.’ That someone in a leadership position articulated a double standard of behavior based on gender did not make sense. Had I been acting inappropriately, her point many have had validity. It was counterintuitive to everything that women have been working toward for such a long time—to be seen as equal.”

The oldest of three children, Nina Barnhart, enlisted in the Army due to economic pressure. Her mother, a single mom without a college education, suffered from several health issues and had difficulty making ends meet. Although she encouraged her children to consider college, Nina knew advanced education would depend on what she could finance on her own. Scoring high on the Armed Forces Vocational Aptitude Battery, Nina had several options for military career fields and chose the Signal Corps specializing in information technology.

Arriving in Mannheim, Germany, Private Second Class Nina Barnhart was assigned to the 2nd Signal Brigade. As an information systems manager, she and her fellow soldiers were responsible for building and maintaining the technology infrastructure. Regularly she traveled through Germany helping units set up networks for battlefield simulation exercises. Tasked with a set of objectives by her NCOs, Nina was self-directed on reaching them. Barnhart explained, “This opportunity and experience remains at the forefront of my leadership development. It demonstrated confidence and respect in my ability not my rank, something I apply to others.” Her performance earned her several advancements including promotion to the grade of Sergeant, E-5, ahead of most of her peers.

Although unsure of a career in the Army Nina wanted to attend college and had begun working on a bachelor’s degree. As a young soldier she experienced both positive and negative leadership examples. She wanted to be a leader who others looked up to. A captain suggested she consider West Point. When Nina learned about the nation’s preeminent leadership school she decided to apply and was accepted.

Looking good

Reflecting back on the lessons she learned as a cadet, five years later and now an officer, Nina is vocal about double standards in behavior and looks.

In any professional capacity it behooves one to look their best. When is looking good, bad?

It is a great combination to be powerful, confident and look feminine. What is not okay is to look overtly sexy and provocative. Knowing that you look your best and are competent is empowering. Finding the sweet spot is what many struggle with particularly in the military, given a daily duty uniform that designed for functionality not for flattery.

Certainly movies such as Officer and a Gentleman, A Few Good Men and Top Gun, depict military men in uniform as powerful, confident, masculine and frankly handsome.

Commissioned a second lieutenant in the Finance Corps in May 2011, Nina believes an attitude and a stereotype exist in the Army that if a woman in uniform looks and acts feminine she is perceived less capable of doing her job. She explained,

“There are so many stereotypes that if a soldier wears make up, has a stylish haircut, or dresses smartly and sharply in and out of uniform she is using her femininity to ‘get ahead’. Gender is not a factor in ability to do one’s job. Just as Solider has no gender.”

Standards of Appearance

Recently the Sergeant Major of the Army, Raymond Chandler, announced Army grooming standards will be revised. “I believe that we can better visualize to the American people and the Army what it means to be an American soldier than we’re doing now,” Chandler told Army Times. “This can be done through personal grooming standards and standards of appearance.” Hot topics include haircuts, French-tipped fingernails, earrings with the Army Combat Uniform and whether soldiers should be allowed to use cell phones while walking or have visible tattoos on their hands and neck. Seeking input from soldiers, Sgt. Maj. Chandler received more than 1250 responses to his request on Facebook.

Most soldiers understand that once you put on a uniform you are a known professional and a walking public relations billboard. But should women look like men?

Reviewing the comments, the majority of responders intimated that male standards for grooming are more important, valuable and appropriate and women should have the same hair and makeup standards. Others noted that if a woman decides to be a soldier she should not care about how she looks. Is this realistic?

Femininity, Nina described, is frequently associated with looks and emotions more than traits and performance outcomes. “I do wear makeup and nail polish (sometimes), and like to look professional or “pretty” as some might say. However, my makeup is always in neutral colors, as are my nails. I don’t think regulations should prohibit women soldiers from being feminine. Being in the Army should not mean females should look like males.” She continued, “The Army’s emphasis on looking professional generally imitates civilian society’s ideals, but is a more conservative version. I don’t think female soldiers should wear bright red nail polish or heavy makeup. It doesn’t look professional in business or in the military. Being feminine does not equal weakness, laziness, an inability to do the job, or the expectation someone else will do their job. These are all things I heard as enlisted and while at West Point.”

In her new unit in Fort Drum, New York, Lieutenant Barnhart’s focus is becoming a strong leader that others want to follow and ensuring the standards that she sets and demonstrate apply equally. This involves getting to know her soldiers professionally and personally, setting clear expectations, giving them opportunities to demonstrate their competency and helping others, and continuing to develop and demonstrate her financial management skills–all while in uniform and looking like the professional officer she is.

For anyone, when is looking good, bad?

Like most authors, Jack Woodville London loves books. After appreciating the many reviews that ran for his first release, French Letters: Virginia’s War, Jack decided to pay it forward and keep his readers informed of the best new military and historical books hitting the market.

I thought you might enjoy reading Jack’s review of Porcelain on Steel: Women of West Point’s Long Gray Line dated Nov. 15, 2011.

Jack Woodville London’s French Letters series has been praised for its meticulous historical research and ability to capture the language, attitudes, and moral culture of their setting in prose described by reviewers as “beautiful, but not pretentious.”French Letters: Engaged in War is the second volume in the French Letters trilogy.

The companion to French Letters Book One: Virginia’s War it is the story of Will Hastings, an army doctor caught up in the D-Day landings in Normandy and the drive to capture St. Lo, France.

This is the 24nd installment in the Honored Role Series.”

Reared around the military, Abby Griffin, a native of Cody, Wyoming, moved to Germany at nine year’s old when her mother was assigned as a nurse with the Department of Defense. In elementary school she showed an early interest in following her mom’s footsteps that later waned in high school.

At the age of 16, back in the States for the summer, Abby set out on a cross-country cycle from Seattle, Washington to Rehoboth Beach, Delaware; riding 80 miles a day for seven weeks with 47 others. Nearing the completion of their coast-to-coast adventure, the peloton stopped at the United States Naval Academy in Annapolis, MD. Although not familiar with the service academy, Abby became enthralled watching the noon formation of the midshipmen.

Upon returning to Germany for her junior year in high school she began researching colleges and started with Annapolis. Although attracted to the physical and mental challenges, and the opportunity to be part of something important, Abby did not want to spend a time at sea. That led her to another service academy, West Point, where she could keep her feet on the ground.

“I wasn’t sure what I wanted to do after college, and I felt that West Point would provide me direction. Sometimes it just takes some extra mileage to get there,” Abby said.

The 2005 West Point graduate and Iraq war veteran recalled an announcement her junior year at the Academy about an information session for cadets interested in nursing. It sparked her earlier childhood interest and though she did not attend; she remembered the announcement.

Stationed in Baumholder, Germany, Abby became the company commander for a headquarters company. She was responsible for deactivating the unit before being transferred to the Forward Support Battalion on the 2nd Brigade Combat Team and deploying to Iraq. Steve, Abby’s husband, an armor officer, had deployed earlier to Iraq with the 2nd Brigade Reconnaissance Team.

Used to hearing regularly from Steve, when the calls and emails stopped, Abby knew the silence meant a solider had been killed. The unit imposed a communication blackout until the next of kin had been notified.

“The whole post held is collective breath. It was a relief when Steve finally called. But I knew from the tone of his voice it was someone we knew. Greg Dalessio was shot in the neck leaving a city council meeting and was killed. Greg, a civil affairs officer, was an easy-going Philadelphian. Liked universally in the unit, he was two months shy of leaving the Army, but was involuntarily extended under the stop loss policy.” In the same attack, Abby learned Pvt. 1st Class Bryan Thomas was shot and killed.

As one of the few commissioned officers in Baumholder, Capt. Abby Griffin was tasked to be the Casualty Assistance Officer for PFC Thomas. This included inventorying his personal gear and mailing them to his family’s stateside casualty assistance officer, settling any financial debts, preparing the notification of death, completing paperwork for his personal effects and preparing his uniform components for burial.

“It was so much harder than I thought it would be, particularly while mourning Greg. Nobody expects to have a stranger go through his or her personal items, clothing, letters and computer hard drive. It’s such an intimate thing and I wanted PFC Thomas to have dignity in death.” Abby wanted his family to feel the care she had taken when they opened the boxes containing their son’s belongings.

With Thomas engaged to be married, Abby wanted to ensure his fiancée’s needs were met. “Legally, his fiancée was not his next of kin, but she too was grieving. One of my hardest days in the Army was when she came to pick up some of her belongings that had been in his room. No Field or Technical Manual tells you how to comfort someone whose life has just been ripped apart, and will never be the same again.”

Following her eventual deployment to Iraq, Abby examined where she wanted to take her career. She thought about how much her mom loved being a nurse; caring for and spending time with patients. At West Point and committed to the Army, it had been too late to pursue nursing. With her active duty service obligation coming to an end, she saw an opportunity to take a route she had considered briefly as a child.

“Life is too short to work at something you don’t love. I had previously thought about nursing, but never pursued it.”

Abby returned to school, as an undergraduate nursing student at Florida State University. “The temporary sacrifice and struggle to start over in a new career far outweigh the years of quiet, soul-killing suffering that come with being in a job that makes you unhappy. Ironically, the military led me back to nursing.”

She described her decision to become a nurse instead of a doctor like several of her West Point classmates. “A doctor’s focus is identifying the problem and eliminating or minimizing it, in a biological sense. Nursing is more holistic—you spend time with patients and care not only for physical needs, but emotional and social ones as well.” Abby noted that many Army nurses advance to leadership positions within the military medical system.

“In labor and delivery where I work now, the nurses are who do most of the hands on care and much of the decision making. Nurses know the patients, and good doctors recognize that they’ll be the first to notice small but important changes in a patient’s status. Nursing is a sacred trust, particularly in labor and delivery.”

With the military short 7000 combat nurses, Abby says nursing may just lead her back to the military. “Army healthcare professional are literally entrusted with the lives and wellbeing of soldiers on a daily basis, regardless of whether or not a war exists. Healthcare professionals need to be vigilant and ethical. They need to be true people of character, able to advocate for the patient regardless of outside influence. These are all qualities West Point emphasizes.”

“Nurses make a difference by what they do and what they don’t do,” Abby said. “Working with injured soldiers is a special privilege … it’s a calling.” And a path few West Point graduates have pursued.

They found a unique, remote and rugged wilderness. Powell’s journal describes a “weird, grand region of naked rock with cathedral like [sic] buttes towering hundreds or thousands of feet, cliffs that cannot be scaled and canyon walls that shrink the river into insignificance.”

Two weeks ago, I set off with nine new and old friends to retrace part of Maj. Powell’s route beyond the 100th meridian in four fiberglass canoes and a kayak. Launching on the Green River at Mineral Basin after a nerve-wracking drive down a dirt road full of switchbacks, we paddled the last 52 miles of calm water through Stillwater Canyon on through Canyonlands National Park to where it meets the Colorado River south of Moab.

Canoeing, hiking and camping in one of the most remote sections of Canyonlands, our group had an opportunity to reconnect with nature and rediscover peace. In our hectic normal day lives we tend to lost that; in our journey we found the healing of solitude. We explored amazing geography, discovered ancient artwork, gazed at the cosmos, listened to the sound of silence, and strengthened friendships. (And marveled at each other’s backcountry culinary talents.)

We devoted two and half days to hiking. Our off-river exploration included Fort Bottom, Turks Head, the Doll House and the Maze, Canyonlands most remote district.

At a time when the unceasing headlines and tweets of the day blare the doom and gloom of global economic volatility, concern about tumbling markets, partisan debates of job loss and creation, the persistent threat of terrorism, the continuation of war, and the constantly fluctuating events that dull our senses, there is one thing that remains steadfast. Places that only change with the seasons and can always be counted on to inspire a sense of wonder and beauty — our National Parks. A gift and treasure we Americans are all able to enjoy without political perspectives and regardless of economic net worth and social status. Pulitzer Prize-Winning author and historian Wallace Stegner called national parks “the best idea we ever had. Absolutely American, absolutely democratic, they reflect us at our best rather than our worst.”

These are lands, forests and reserves set aside by previous generations for all future generations to enjoy. Republican President Theodore Roosevelt, a noted conservationist and great outdoorsman, signed legislation establishing five national parks. In his second term, he signed the Antiquities Act of 1906, allowing the President to set aside certain valuable public natural areas as park and conservation land. The Act has been used more than hundred times since its passage.

Our river adventure in the amazing outdoors provided us endless exploration of magnificent canyons, and discovery of ancient Indian ruins and remote pictographs and petroglyphs. We witnessed nature’s beauty on the grandest of scales. The finest superlatives are not adequate to describe the peace, grandeur and richness of this area.

The most unexpected benefit was the refuge we all had from the ever-present, ever-demanding technologically-driven world. For eight days we were disconnected — figuratively and literally unplugged. No web, no wireless world, no deadlines, no commitments and no expectations. The one satellite phone we had in case of an emergency never left its waterproof case. Being in the moment in that beautiful natural place with friends hydrated me; replenishing a soul thirsty for an interruption from the grind. It was rustic, adventurous and therapeutic.

Canoeing on still water is a minimalist activity. You can enjoy the simplicity and beauty of a boat, the rhythm of the oar stroking the water. And the appreciation for tent, campfire, camaraderie and food prepared riverside at the end of an unfettered day. I do admit taking a few more provisions than Powell and his pioneering party.

Disconnecting from smart phones and laptops is downright liberating. It is the re-integration that is proving to be challenging and confining. I just want to be outside and enjoy the gorgeous fall weather painted on a canvas with an artist’s palette of colors of the changing and falling leaves.

Venturing to Southern Utah may not be easily accessible for everyone. But such a break can be found in nature close to where people all live and work–in municipal parks and forests or just a drive in the countryside. Empirical evidence suggests these smaller scale urban green areas not only provide important environmental and ecological roles, but also provide important restorative physiological functions such as reducing stress and creating a sense of peace and tranquility.

In the challenging and difficult times we live in, we need to take breaks. Nature calls us, invites, reenergizes and restores us. She also puts us in our place and reminds us that we are only part of a larger macrocosm. We are stewards, not owners of this land.

Powell’s voyage nearly a century and half earlier was one of scientific discovery and grand adventure. Our trip, while not of scientific significance was one of personal discovery and what we sorely needed. While I love my iPhone and Mac Book, I do not want to be available 24-7. Some people (the President, on-duty ER doctors and emergency personnel) need to be reachable at a moment’s notice. But we, not in those professions, should chose to not always be there “on demand.” Set boundaries for yourself. Take the time to disconnect, unplug, and get off the grid and step away.

What will you find if you step off the grid for a few hours or days? You might find more of yourself and a closer connection to what’s really important in life: family, friends, and an appreciation for the beautiful things in our world.