Last month I hung out with some fellow preteen leaders, both at the preteen leaders’ conference and the FourFiveSix retreat. One of the things that stuck out to me was how out of date with preteen culture I have become. Up until 7 months ago, I kept a really good pulse on what’s going on in the world of preteens. I was up to speed on movies, celebrities, TV shows, music and what’s going on in the news. But not now…a lot happens in 7 months!

I have always valued being culturally relevant, but lately I am out of touch. However, I am ready to change. I am going to start blogging regularly about observations I see in preteen culture and give you ideas on how to capitalize on them. I plan to give you insights from movies at the box office, music, TV shows, books preteens are into and more. I will write about the pros and cons of what’s out there, helping to inform leaders and parents. I will offer insights that might inspire you to build a weekend lesson around a topic. It’s going to be fun, are you ready?

If you want to reach preteens, you need to know what preteens are in to these days. You need to be up to speed on the movies/TV shows they watch, the music they listen to, the websites they frequent and the current news that affects them.

Why?

You can use those cultural elements in your lessons and maximize your message. The method of communication is ever changing, but the message stays the same. Culture is the heartbeat of the method.

It gives you insight into what language preteens speak – what makes them laugh, cry or motivates them into action.

It gives you common ground when creating conversations with preteens.

Bottom line: If you want to effectively reach preteens, stay up to date on what’s going on in their world.

The funny thing about culture is that it shifts and changes often. What was cool 6 months ago might be out of date today. So, it is our job to stay up to date. I am excited to take this journey with you. Are you ready?

Share on Facebook

Here’s some interesting stats regarding media consumption:

Young people, ages 8-18, spend an average of 7.5 hours a day consuming some type of media.

Smartphone owners spend an average of 30 minutes more a day interacting with media compared to those who don’t have smartphones. (How many preteens in your group own one?)

The stimulation that media brings (heightened with the introduction of the smartphone) provides excitement…which researchers say can be addictive. In it’s absence people feel bored.

There is a 12% increase in multi-tasking when people consume media. Too much multi-tasking leads to stress, inhibition of creative ability, inability to problem solve and slower thinking.

Think about this…

The smartphone is new to us. I remember when the very first mobile phone was introduced into the market. Do you? It was heavy, big and rectangular in shape. I remember when the internet didn’t exist. Do you? The preteens in your group weren’t alive back then. They are a generation where the internet, smartphones, iPad, etc. are simply a part of everyday life. Media is all around and it is here to stay.

As those who lead preteens, our objective is to train them to become responsible consumers of media. One day they will have full control of what music they listen to, what they search for online and the movies they watch. Our goal is to train them now, while they’re still moldable, to chew the meat and spit out the bones. So that as they get older, it happens automatically. Like a reflex. But the training starts now.

I believe the biggest problem young people face today is the inability to filter the media they consume. Preteens take in massive amounts of media and let it affect their thoughts, beliefs and actions. Often, without consciously knowing it. That’s the secret weapon of sin and temptation. They sneak in as seemingly harmless – under the radar. They become what we believe to be normal or acceptable, and that is when we set ourselves up for failure in the area of sin.

A great discipline we can teach preteens is pay attention. Help them to see the messages that are coming their way. Help them to accept the good messages and reject the bad ones. Help them to guard their minds, sometimes choosing on their own to not watch a video or image or listen to a particular song.

Looking for a good series to help preteens filter their media intake? Check out our newest small group series, Under the Radar.

Share on Facebook

I am really excited about a new preteen series coming soon – Epic Fail. I spent all day Saturday with Chris Santos, our video guy, shooting segments for the video series. I even have a sunburn to prove it (we shot outside)! Epic Fail will be a six-week series helping preteens deal with failure. Preteens fail all the time – at school, home and on the playground. They often feel a lot pressure from parents, teachers, coaches and God (or even from themselves) to perform at a high standard. And when they don’t live up to those expectations, it can be devastating. The Epic Fail series will help preteens deal with failure in a healthy way. They’ll learn how God can shine through their failures, how God can help them learn from failure and much more.

I’m excited also about the video segments that will go along with the lessons. This is a first for us! It’s been months in the making. The series was written back in December and it has taken months to get the videos filmed and edited. Preteens live in a media driven world, so using video can help drive home the point in a powerful way. But when the entire teaching is on video, the human element is missing. That’s why we decided to only provide a 5-8 minute video segment in each lesson. The videos either open up the teaching or emphasize a particular point. And video segments are “cool” enough for preteens. No cheezy clowns or magic tricks!

We plan to release Epic Fail sometime later this month, so keep an eye out for it!

Share on Facebook

Ms. Montag and my son, Joey at Disneyland.

My 8 year-0ld son, Joey, has the best teacher in the world – Ms. Montag. She’s passionate about teaching her students and taking an interest in them outside of school activities. She makes teaching fun, which inspires students to reach their full potential. She’s enthusiastic about teaching, which motivates students to learn. Always looking for the best in them, she lavishes students with praise and encouragement. Her evenings at home are often filled with planning how to make the next day’s lesson over the top. Going above and beyond her role as a teacher, she takes an interest in her students outside of school. For example, she’s come over our house for dinner and a movie. She watched my kids for a few hours while I was taken to the emergency room. She went with our family to Disneyland. She knows what’s going on in her students lives. Teaching is more than a job, it’s her life’s passion!

People who are filled with passion for their work do extraordinary things! They impact others’ lives in a positive way. Their passion brings out the best in others and inspires them do great things!

How passionate are you these days? Need more? Want to keep it alive? Here are a few “passion ignitors” based on my experience:

1. Read books, blogs and stories that inspire you
Passion leaks. You’re busy pursuing worthwhile goals that make an impact in others. So, get refueled by reading books, blogs and stories that inspire you.

2. Keep a healthy balance.
Your passionate pursuits have a way of taking over. You love what you do, so your passion becomes your life. If you’re not careful, then you’ll get burnt out. Do things that relax you and get your mind off of things. For me that’s taking a walk, body boarding or surfing, journaling and spending time with family. A couple of times a year take extended time off. Get away from email and work for days or weeks at at time.  Take a vacation!! When you return, you’ll be refreshed and refueled.

3. Connect with others who are pursuing life and God with passion.
Find some friends who are passionate about similar things. But also hangout with others who are passionate about other things you’re not – your world will be expanded. Passion is contagious.

4. Refuel.
If you have money in the budget, attend a conference related to your area of passion. Go there to learn, but also refuel. Give yourself an extra day or two before or after the conference to just relax. Giving yourself buffer time allows you to breath, process and spend time with God. Intentionally skip sessions during the conference so you don’t get overloaded. Conferences have a way of actually making you feel more tired afterward. Don’t allow that to happen. Skip sessions and connect with others who are attending. Meet some new people. Another idea – buy the DVD or audio sessions of conferences you can’t attend. Take time out during your week to immerse yourself in those sessions in order to refuel.

5. Stay connected to Jesus.
This probably should have been #1. Jesus is the one who gives you passion to reach preteens. Being a leader is like being a bucket. You pour your heart and soul into others. But the bucket gets empty and Jesus is your source. Be sure to attend your churches weekend services, join (not lead) a small group, spend time with God throughout the week, etc. Keep your relationship with God alive and healthy.

Share on Facebook

If the above video doesn’t appear on your device (iPad, iPhone, etc), click here to watch it - Caine’s Arcade

I came across the Caine’s Arcade video and was inspired. Yes, I even shed some tears near the end! If you haven’t watched it yet, I highly recommend you do. You’ll be inspired by what a 9 year old can do. Caine’s vision and determination certainly payed off.

9 year old Caine had a vision – to build a cardboard arcade at his dad’s used auto parts store in L.A. He came up with a game plan and worked out every little details himself. Eventually, he created an arcade and it was cool. But no customers were stopping by to enjoy his invention. Until one customer, Nirvan, walked in and changed everything. Nirvan recognized that Cain had a gift to share with the world, but didn’t have a platform to spread the word. Nirvan had a platform and helped get the word out. The rest is history.

Caine represents the preteens you lead. They have God-given gifts, talents and abilities just waiting to be shared with the world. However, like Caine, those gifts oftentimes get overlooked. That’s where you step in.

Nirvan helped Caine in many ways. He affirmed Caine’s arcade and found a way to share it with the world. The arcade became a hit, both in L.A. and around the world when it went viral. As a result of hearing Caine’s story, others where empowered to do something wonderful with their gift and talents.

Nirvan represents you. Your role as a preteen leader is to affirm the gifts and talents of the preteens in your group. Encourage them as often as possible. But also empower them to succeed. Maybe a preteen in your group has a gift to play the guitar. Find out a way to get him lessons and give him the opportunity to be on the worship team in your preteen group. Or maybe a student is artistically talented. Have her help design a flyer for your next event or help come up with a logo for an upcoming series.

Your role is to affirm, encourage and empower preteens. Help them discover ways God can use them to do amazing things!

For the full story on Caine’s Arcade, visit their website

Share on Facebook

The FourFiveSix Team (from left to right): Nate Cummings, Sean Sweet, Mike Branton, Katie Gerber, Patrick Snow, Heather Dunn, Mike Sheley, Nick Diliberto.

After the 2012 preteen leaders’ conference, which ended last Friday, the FourFiveSix team, who coordinated the conference, got away for a few days. We drove from Sacramento to a town called Truckee (near Lake Tahoe) in northern California. We hung out together, played SuperSmash Brothers (yes, on the Gamecube…the cabin even had a Nintendo 64), ate a lot of awesome food and brainstormed the next year. We dreamed how the world would be different if preteens everywhere would begin to own their faith in Jesus. We were inspired by each others passion to help the church better reach preteens and  brainstormed around the clock this year’s strategy.

Thanks to Patrick Snow, our fearless leader (also bald like me), we better refined why we exist. We always knew that FourFiveSix existed to help your preteen ministry take the next step. But we needed a strategy and focus. After a few hours of discussion we came up with this. I guess you would call it our mission statement.

How does FourFiveSix help you take the next step? By helping the Church figure out how to lead preteens towards owning all aspects of their faith. We do that by providing and cultivating resources, consultation, a credible voice, affirmation, advocacy, awareness  & understanding, networking, community and training.

Like many you, we want to take on the world. But we acknowledged that we have a limited amount of time and resources. So we decided to focus on three main things this year: the 2013 preteen leaders’ conference, the FourFiveSix.org website and peer groups (launching in July/August). We also have some things on the drawing board for the future (can’t let the cat out of the bag). Focusing on those three things assures that we stay focused and maximize effectiveness.

I am honored and excited to be a part of the team!

Share on Facebook

At the 2012 fourfivesix preteen leaders’ conference attendees were asked to write their ideas of what they do with various areas of their preteen ministry. They posted them on a board outside the main meeting area for all to see. Now, we get to share them with you.

Click on the below links to see what was written on each section of the board. Maybe you will get some new ideas by seeing what others are doing in that area.

Small Group Board

Worship Board

Teaching/Curriculum Board

Games Board

Volunteers Board

Everything Else Board

Thanks to the FourFiveSix team for a great conference! Hope to see you next year in Indiana on April 17-19, 2013!

Share on Facebook

Last week, the FourFiveSix team led the Preteen Leaders’ Conference in Rocklin, CA. We had 160 leaders from around the country (and some Canadians) gather to learn how to take the next step in their preteen ministries. By the way, the dates for next year’s conference is April 17-19, 2013 and it will be hosted in Indiana (near Indianapolis).

I soaked in every moment and wrote down tons of notes.

Here is the big takeaway I wanted to share with you: The delivery methods were extremely helpful.

Participants got a sneak peak into three preteen ministries (Elevate, Beyond & 56) during three 1.5 hour sessions. For years, the FourFiveSix team has talked about the importance of letting go of the bike. This year, we offered three ways that philosophy is expressed in three preteen ministries. We answered the question…How do you equip preteens to own their faith? I wish I could bring what I and others experienced, but I simply can’t. You have to go to the conference next year.

But I do have a takeaway for you: Discover your delivery method.

If your goal is to let go of the bike or help preteens own their faith in Jesus, then your delivery method is how you go about doing that. It  encompasses everything from the videos you show, lessons you teach, small group questions you ask, worship songs you lead, etc. Basically, it’s the way you go about helping preteens to walk with God on their own (as you walk alongside them).

The danger of coming to a conference or reading a book/blog is that many offer a method of doing ministry. Many then duplicate that method. Why is that bad? Because every church, community and preteen ministry is different. You can’t take a cookie cutter approach. Instead, discover your delivery method.

How do you discover your delivery method?  Chew the meat and spit out the bones.

Find out what other preteen leaders are doing and observe them. Ask for the philosophy behind the programming elements. Pick their brains. Read blogs and look at available preteen curriculum. Come to the preteen leaders’ conference next year. Team up with other preteen leaders in your local area and brainstorm together. Dream together. Educate yourself on preteen development so you understand what makes them tick. Then, throw out what doesn’t work for you and keep what does. Experiment and tweak along the way. Over time you will discover your delivery method. You’ll discover what’s effective at your church, in your community, with your preteens.

Our team at FourFiveSix is at Lake Tahoe right now for a three-day retreat. Our goal is to map out ways we can help you do all this. I’ll talk more about our plans in an upcoming blog post.

Share on Facebook

Here’s my thoughts after sitting in on the service:

Elevate’s Wednesday night service is called Reveal. The leader doesn’t do a teaching. Rather, he creates a moment, video or presents an idea. Preteens then journal what God is speaking to them and share their thoughts with each other in small group. For a more detailed explanation of this, listen to this podcast: The Reinvention of Preteen Ministry.

Sean did a great job of helping the preteen take ownership of the service faith and take ownership of the service. In other words, he did a fantastic job of letting go of the bike. Preteens gave the announcements, helped run a/v, led prayer in front of the group, read verses from the front and more. They were involved in almost every aspect of the service. They weren’t told what to think or believe, but were encouraged to seek what God was speaking to them. Talking about their thoughts afterwards in small groups, preteens were able to learn from each other. Leaders were letting go, but staying close by.

Another really cool aspect was worship. Preteens were engaged in worship. Yes, they were singing, clapping and dancing. But it was more than that. They were engaging with God and praising Him. During slow songs, they were encountering God on a deeper level. It was cool!

Overall, preteens were excited and eager to participate in every element of the service appropriately. In worship, they worshiped. During the stage game, they played and cheered for their peers. They discussed the topic during small group. They wrote in their journals when asked to write down what God was speaking to them.

If you haven’t already, I highly recommend you listen to the full podcast explaining the thinking behind Elevate’s Reveal service. If you have any questions, feel free to contact Sean at ssweet@destinyrocklin.com.

My next post will be my highlights from the preteen leaders conference. Excited to flesh it out!

Share on Facebook

I am really excited about the Preteen Leaders Conference, which officially starts tomorrow – April 19th. Tonight I (and anyone else attending) get to see a preteen ministry, Elevate, in action. Elevate will be having their midweek service and us leaders get to sit in the back and soak it all in. Two years ago I visited Elevate as an extension of the preteen leaders conference, and it was the highlight of the trip for me. Sean SWEET leads Elevate, and he is one of the best communicators to preteens in the world. No, really, he is like master Yoda. Or maybe we’ll call him SWEET Yoda. Okay, that sounds weird. Anyway, really excited about tonight!

I plan to take some pictures of Elevate and post them this blog. Their room design is SWEEET (pun intended)! I also plan to write up some bullet points on my observations. And I plan to do a few blog posts on Thursday & Friday’s sessions from the conference.

So, be sure to keep coming back and see all the cool stuff I’m learning at the preteen leaders conference!

Share on Facebook