they say i'm crazy...

Straight Out of Compton...

2015-08-06T08:21:00.000-07:00

I saw it last night.

1st, Little O'shea, you can get it on my next birthday, lol.

2nd, on a more serious note, excellent movie. Them boys played the hell out of their rolls. Kudos kids! Very proud.

3rd, I cried. A LOT! Not even at the parts I should have. Like, We all "knew" E died of AIDS. (I'm still skeptical as to how he contracted that shit... honestly... I don't trust the government, lol.) That was sad but expected so you got no tears from me on that part. I cried at the injustices: the police brutality, the gang fights, the Suge Knight lol. I cried about them getting fucked over financially cause like MOST black talent in the past, they could read a contract and DAMN SURE couldn't trust white lawyers, managers, record execs, etc.

I'm tired. 30 fucking years and we still getting beat up, robbed, picked on by gang members with badges. AND... we still can't fucking read. (I mean this. I know a few individuals who LIVE by their college degrees. They boast and brag about them all day, it's so cute but so sad. None of them have jobs in the field they majored in, and none of these particular individuals CAN FUCKING READ AND COMPREHEND! I showed a few a business plan I wrote and they didn't get it. They needed a dictionary for what I thought were basic business terms. I just don't understand! I'm a dropout for fuck's sake! A HIGH SCHOOL drop out lol.)

We're not putting any effort into anything anymore. We don't care. We sit around like entitled kids expecting hand outs and free passes. Then get upset when shit don't work out for us. THEN, when we haven't done any of the REAL work we should have been doing, we lean on "God", and put all our frivolous wishes in Jesus name but don't even know who Jesus was. (Please don't get me started on the Bible and what not, Shakespeare wrote it and I coulda swore that ninja was known for shit like A Midsummer Night's Dream. Great STORY by the way. The Bible got a lot of GREAT STORIES too as a matter of fact, but I can't take no contradictory tales as a little book of instructions for my life. Let the Bible lead me, I'm supposed to be someone's property when read in certain contexts... and that's a little too grey for me so... you know. I mean, low key, L Ron Hubbard wrote some religious books too after a crap ton of sic-fi.... See, don't get me started... I'll go into Egyptian history, other Afrikan histories, etc... lol.

I digress.

These killings we keep hearing about and reading about on FaceBook ARE NOT A NEW TREND by the way! They have BEEN doing this. They just finally started reporting them and THAT should make you wonder.

Remember that 9 out of 10 times, cops are scared of you. They're like snakes. Seriously. While they CAN fuck you up, they're usually afraid, so they WILL attack you cause for whatever reason, the bad cops are always "in fear of their life". Goddam shame.

More than police bullying people, I am tired of US! I'm tired. Read something, know your rights, fight for them intelligently. I am by no means someone who will ever just stand there and take some bullshit, but when I argue with you, I like to at least SOUND like I know what the fuck I'm talking about!

In the past, when we witnessed some serious police brutality/injustice what did we do? We rioted, right? We fucked shit up. In our OWN neighborhoods though. The 60's Watt's Riots, the whole early 90s lol, all we did was hurt ourselves. It also gives them right to beat this shit out of us, shoot us, run us down in a large group. We've become domestic terrorists when we start flipping cars and starting fires, and terrorists get bombed. Lol... Think about that.

Back then, I get it. It was tough times. BUT YOU! You however, have ALL the information you could ever need about anything right here in front of you... at your finger tips. But, you probably prefer arguing about dumb shit on FaceBook, shopping for the latest trends, and stalking people that don't give a fuck about you while bored at work huh? *shrug* fuck it. Go on an gossip then. Keep reading my blog, cause I tell ALL my own business. You can get "the tea" straight from the horse's mouth smh.

My point was, we don't care. We are just slaves to the system and for what? For lack of fight. I thought colored folks were strong. ALL us colored folks. lol... U "niggas" let gold chains sparkle yo' ass into submission? That's sad. YOU'RE ALREADY KINGS AND QUEENS and them fucking jewels you want so badly are INSIDE YOU! But you can't find them cause you're too busy drowning in the jones' you wanna keep up with.

For the record....

This is NOT what you look like:

THIS is who you are:

Awww Damn... we don't even know huh? WHO ARE YOU? I'm curious.

You want to be some shit you saw on tv but them tv tricks don't even want to be themselves, lol...

I'M FUCKING TIRED!

Get your shit together for our kids.

AND, try a #readthatbook challenge, or a #growthemherbs challenge... little nasty hot asses.

I'll get to you boys later... 30 goddam years, smh. You don't even know how to be men anymore. SMFH

I'm done.

Refurbishing Old Art...

2015-07-11T03:45:00.001-07:00

I've been working on this piece for only a few days... I am in LOVE with it. Wait until I actually finish it though! I'll explain in full detail once the piece is completed. This IS the best piece I have done so far, and it's not even finished yet.

-Briana Latrise

The Truth Serum Monologues: Vol 1

2015-07-01T00:27:00.002-07:00

I talk so much [shit].

and I'm hungry.

...I know that in the grand scheme of things, I know nothing.

THAT DOES NOT MEAN THAT I KNOW NOTHING!

I need these "men" to stop being intimidated by me. Start appreciating me FOR me. When you see flaws, don't compete... Just school me.

Takes a village.

U with the village?

-Briana Latrise

Church and the 'Good' Men.

2015-06-26T21:03:00.000-07:00

CHURCH...

Specifically the Christian Church.

I've been finding it progressively difficult to date Christians, and even more difficult to attend their churches. SMH. I tried once [to date a Christian]. I tried, oh so hard to be "good". I was definitely faithful in our relationship which is usually quite difficult for me. I get easily distracted by shiny objects, or in this case, pheromones. Then, I give in to my animalistic urges, take a new lover, but I tell whoever I cheated on about it as I leave them. At least I leave! Right?

....

No?

Ok well...

With this one, we'll call him "Dufus", I was "good". Faithful. Loyal. Loving. Affectionate. Submissive. SUB-FUCKING-MISSIVE! That's NEVER been my thing. Ever. Smh. For him though: I would wake up at 4am to make sure he was up and getting ready for work, I'd make his lunch, bake him fresh cookies to snack on and share [because he loved to brag to his work cronies about how good he had it at home]. When he returned from work, his protein shake was ready and his house clean, so all he had to do was grab it go since he supposedly hit the gym every single day after work. For hours. Once he returned from the "gym", he'd shower and play video games while I made dinner. (In hindsight, I fell into domestication so easily it's actually scary. I guess deep down, I want structure. I think...) when it comes to Dufus, I thought God had placed him in my life to show me what a real Christian man is supposed to be like. What a real relationship was supposed to be like. Until him, it was all sex, drugs, and traps. I thought we were supposed to be something more than what it actually was. (i'm lame for that.)

One day, he calls to tell me that our weekly date night plans are cancelled because he's meeting an old "home girl" who's in town from San Diego or somefuckingwhere for dinner. *blank stare* Mmmmk. He tells me not to worry though because her boyfriend will be there. So... *blank strare* "why can't I go?", I asked rhetorically. To which he replies, "why?".... Um, ok. I'm no dummy, [I do dumb shit, but only 'cause I like doing hood rat things with my friends sometimes but] I fell off no turnip truck this day, yesterday or any fucking day and I can add, Bitch. 1+1 never made 11 in real life. But yea...

So my new "Christian" lifestyle had me picking and choosing my battles, so I said nothing. I went on about my day. Mind you: My days were boring as fuck! No booze, no weed, no friends. Just me and paint. Which is cool, but I feed off of my good people's energies [and arresting music... or, just living life the way I love it] when I'm in my paint zone. Alas, I had no friends because most of them are males and that didn't sit well with Dufus. Most likely because he fucks all of his female friends , so how could he trust me alone with someone of the opposite sex, but that's neither here nor there. I was pissed. He's lying, he's cheating and I can't prove it yet AND... I have no "party favors" cause I'm being, "GOOD". *insert screw face here*

For the record: I'm far more into mind sex, food porn and the intricacies of whomever's company i'm in than have intercourse. It feels good when I lust you, but I might fuck around and have a baby. Which doesn't feel good most days. It feels tiring... (we'll get to that story later.)

A few weeks later [maybe even days, I don't know, I think I often drink memories into suppositious folklore], he has the audacity to cancel our date night again because he "forgot" that before we became an item, and before he moved me into his home, before ALL of that... he promised a female friend that he would be her escort to her college graduation party??? Fuck me. I spazzed. I had to. Because even if he did genuinely forget the promise he made to her, he only gave me 45 minutes notice. He's full of shit. He remembered to rent a tuxedo, polish his shoes, and wash his ass before he remembered to tell his girlfriend!? Few weeks later, I suddenly wasn't his girlfriend. Because I went to New York. ON BUSINESS! Met up with some homies and partied like old times. He saw some footage he didn't like. So now, we just live in the same studio apartment playing house but he has all right to do whatever the fuck he wants... like come home with a hickie on his neck after "passing out" at his best friend's house one night. He was "too drunk" with all 6 feet and 3 inches of his 220 pound lying ass to fight off a horny female. I left him. I went into a deep depression for 2 weeks. Then I got back on my old

horse cause I know that bitch real well. No surprises with her: party party party, get money, party more, get more money, pass out somewhere, wake up and wonder what happened to the week. Called my dad and told him I needed rehab so he sent me to Jersey to visit my [grand]PARENTS. I decided to stay for good. Had no where else to go anyway. [This eventually let to the human puppy I made, Seven. His name is Seven. That's another story tho.]

So as I said, I tried once, and he cheated AND burned me. Womp, womp.

I moved on and decided to take all the positives out of our relationship and appreciate them. The positives like: he DID help me pay for culinary school, [for the few weeks I attended], I sure did hear a lot of awesome stories from the Bible in those Bible Study classes he conned me into, and MOST IMPORTANTLY, at least it was a curable STI. See! Positives!

He was a pastor's son, real good at pretending he was a good man on the right path... on the right track. He was FUCKING EXCELLENT at making me feel like the shitty little degenerate he thought I was. Constantly nagging about my smoking cigarettes and weed, my drinking, my living situation [the only female in a house full of men] before he moved me into his shoebox apartment in South Bumblefuck, the way I curse, the way I think, the way I hustle, EVERYTHING! Just judging me all the time and using the Bible to explain why everything I was doing was so wrong. Yet, he smoked cheap ass cigars, drank whenever he felt like it, slutted around town unprotected and lied all the time. His MOM even lied for him! Still makes no sense to me. He refused to admit that he burned me too. Whatever, Hypocrite.

For the record: Those men I lived with, have always looked out for me, never hurt me, never stolen from me, never bad mouthed me, never turned their backs on me. They took care of me even when they should have given up on me. When everyone else gave up, they were there. Without judgment. S/O #TMIMITW GANG! More than friends, they are my brothers. All of them.

I tried to date another Christian recently, and this may have been the absolute

most ephemeral hard on I've ever had for someone. I just can't comprehend [with what I think I DO know of Christianity and it's principles/RULES/restrictions] how you can be in Bible Study one minute, fornicating with me the next minute, getting drunk and high on Saturday night, back in church on Sunday, Monday in my bed, like... I just don't get it. Why subscribe? You're clearly not all in. I'm just saying. The more I lean towards NO RELIGION at all, the harder it is to be with or even around certain people with certain beliefs. Not knocking what anyone believes [shit, I believe in extraterrestrials] but don't put your beliefs on me. I do not have to subscribe to YOUR rules, or YOUR truths. It just seems hypocritical to me for you [Mr. Bible Thumper] to tell me [The Free Spirit] how to live my life according to what a book told you. A book. A BOOK. In fact, most of the Christians I know don't really practice what they preach at me.

For the record: There are some really great chunks of guidance in THAT book on how to live. I also feel that way about several other books. I''m just saying that I don't/won't trust anything in its entirety. Especially something that can be used for evil just as well if not better than it can be used for good. What do I mean? Um... Slavery, 'Merica, etc.

Personally, I trust in me. Technically, if God is in me... and I trust me... I have faith. No? I trust the Universe. I trust that everything is everything and we make choices and shit happens and the world spins and it's all LOVE. Love is God, right? ---> [1 John 4:7,8]

So... I don't really know what my religion is. If all of the religions [with the acceptation of this Satanism thing that I know nothing about] had a baby, and that baby grew up and mated with a celestial entity, and that baby mated with music... I lost myself for a second, but my point is that I'm not subscribing to shit. I don't even want to label what this is that I'm about but for now, let's just call it "living". I am living. I'm trying to figure it out, like the rest of you who care to. New religion: LIVING. lol.

Love. Wisdom. Truth.

The three strokes in this symbol represent three shafts of light. They can represent earth, sea and air; body, mind and spirit; love, wisdom and truth. Three separate parts that all work in together.

Awen is the wisdom, truth and most of all the inspiration, Awen is Nature, the universal power behind life, yet it is never born and shall never die. Awen is a force or energy forged from an indivisible source that is the power behind the physical and non-physical or spirit forms Existence, and distinction between the natural and the super-natural becomes meaningless, as both are the personification of Awen Every link which is a part of nature, be it a man, animal, plant or elemental force, each holds its own little piece and together make up the whole chain which is Awen. Awen is the spirit of Druid itself, it is knowing, sensing and feeling it in your essence and true being, it is the freedom to accept ones nature.

For the record: I know that I have poor taste in men in general. #FACTS so... For now, just know that while I'm not against dating religious people, I'm probably not going to. I'd rather just "do me" till I figure out what it is I'm actually "doing".

...yeah...

-Briana Latrise

I'M BACK SNITCHES!!!!!!!!!!!!

2015-06-25T12:32:00.001-07:00

Hello.
"It's been a long time... I shouldn't left you..."
But I got knocked up, baby daddy turned out to be a little boy who ran, and shit was tuff! Here I am tho... Baby's 20 months... (for non parents and mofos who can't count... he's almost 2 years old). I've been through some things:

Started a business
Fell in love with a dream
Then I fell in love with a lie
Found myself
Started another business
Lost myself
Overworked myself
Found myself again
Remembered my original self
Combined both those hoes...
and here we are, today. In 2015. Trine keep it balanced.

I'm about to actually PURPOSE this blog this time around.
I find that when I vent, I'm less likely to scowl in public. More likely to smile at strangers and let's just be honest here: what you give is what you get. So in a sense, I am selfishly venting here... but it'll do some good in my universe... and since 6 degrees of separation feels more like you live 3 blocks away and I used to date your homie... it'll possibly do your universe some good too.

DISCLAIMER:::
I WILL say whatever the FUCK I feel HOWEVER I feel... I may apologize... but I probably won't.
If you no likey... you know what to do.
*kisses*
U READY?

I need a green tea bath...

2011-09-25T16:34:00.000-07:00

I've been fighting off some random sickness for like a week now... it's starting to making me angry... kinda like everything else after a while lol.
My eyes hurt. That's how serious it is... Like my actual eyeballs ache.Along with every other part of my body! SMH.

Anyhoo....

I'm just checkin in. Tell me something new... please...

Doin right ain't gettin me anywhere....

2011-09-20T23:26:00.000-07:00

I really need to learn to pray better or something. Or maybe I need to learn patience...

I wonder if anyone who actually made something of their lives thought about dying early. The gay shit is... I can't do it. No matter how bad I want to, I just can't. However, I can see me robbing a bank at gunpoint and refusing to drop my weapon right about now.

I need food.

In thirteen seconds (figuratively... maeaning really soon if I don't get some kind of help/motivation/reassurance) I will definitely start selling pussy since talent ain't been getting me anywhere... and school just costs a lot more than I have right now. All I have is talent and twat. Talent, twat, and angry bitterness...

I really shoulda stole that can of chili from the store when I thought about it. It's been like 24 hours since I've eaten food. SMH.

This is Bullshit.

Hahahahaaaaaaaa

2011-09-19T16:46:00.000-07:00

aaaahahahahaaaaaaaa.... fucking jokes!!!!

Help

2011-09-17T06:18:00.001-07:00

OMG!!!!!!!!!!

You asked me to start posting again... so...

2011-09-16T18:15:00.000-07:00

Lately it's been becoming more and more apparent that we HAVE to cut trees down... What I mean by that is, if you have a bunch of worthless ass, do nothing people in your life, they become obstacles. You can't see ahead of you with worthless acquaintances. And you damn sure can't take them with you cause they'll slow you down and you may never get to where you're going should you even be able to see where you're headed. Seriously.

So with that said... I have to kill a couple of people off. Done. Dead to me, done. Like, when you call, I will never answer. When you text, I will never respond. When I see you in the street, I will continue on as if I never knew you at all and don't care to.

Sayonara bitches! I moving up the ladder and I'm never looking down...

I like my alone time.

Yep...

2011-09-15T00:16:00.000-07:00

Social Lubricant

2011-05-19T23:55:00.001-07:00

I feel like my best friend resides in a bottle until it decides to kill off little bits of my liver. Smh. I don't know why I turn to Jose and Jack before Jesus... but I do. Maybe partly because I feel they'd rather listen to my problems, or maybe because I'm weak and they have a tendancy to help make it seem easier to deal with/tolerate, or talk to people whom I'd usually rather not. Maybe because I can use them as an excuse for some of my ways which may not be accepted by society... idk...

I thought I could come "home" and make dinner for my man... but half way through the process my dumb ass woke up... He's still a boy. He doesn't appreciate shit. He doesn't pay the bills, he doesn't take the dogs out when they ask to go... (what if they were his kids?) He just DOESN'T. Part of me justifies shit with the fact that he's younger... however...

idk...

All I DO know, is that I have a 3 page essay to write in 12 hours. A self motivating essay. FUCK!

Self motivate?

If I could do that, or anything else right... would I still be struggling???

It's not getting done. SMH

Figures...

and the "units" wonder why I fuck up...

Blackberry Photos 001

2011-05-19T14:01:00.001-07:00

...duh... by me!!!!

"After The Bandages"...

2011-05-17T14:24:00.000-07:00

...by me...

"The Dolls"

2011-05-17T13:55:00.000-07:00

...by me...

Canna Zebra Cole...

2011-05-17T11:27:00.001-07:00

He says, "Baby... why you love me so much?"
I say, "cause I do... duh!"

My New FAVORITE flower... ROSES ARE SO DEAD!!!

"The Drones"

2011-05-17T08:47:00.000-07:00

by me... duh.

"The Foreigners"

2011-05-15T08:12:00.000-07:00

by me... duh!

My Photography...

2011-05-08T17:33:00.001-07:00

check my website out...

CLICK HERE TO VIEW THE SITE

It's Been a While...

2011-05-05T12:23:00.000-07:00

Forgive my inconsistencies... but I do believe that 90% of you just want to see me fail anyway. I think that's just the way of the world. I mean, look at Charlie Sheen. Only asshole in the world (and I mean "ASSHOLE") to obtain almost 4 million followers on twitter in record breaking time. Not because he's got words of wisdom... not because he's full of fun factoids... nope... mostly cause misery loves company. People just want to see him FAIL. Smh.

Whatever... I started school. I decided to go back and enjoy myself learning the shit I want to do before I end up in jail again... or dead. But... as life goes... whenever you try to do something right, something beneficial for self, something towards the right direction.... someone or something always tries to detour you. Smh. Hater bitches, and random pieces of paperwork that you can't find when you need them, or that you can't afford to purchase the day before a deadline... smh.

I found Inspiration

2011-03-16T00:56:00.000-07:00

Perfection

2011-03-11T12:46:00.001-08:00

I think that Jesus was perfect because He knew who He was.

Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile

Just a Reminder...

2011-03-11T02:41:00.000-08:00

YEAH... SOMETHING TO DO

2011-03-10T21:29:00.000-08:00

So I'm sitting here talking to Emily... (@emilyldavis ) and we're discussing the current state of the world... and she brought up this book.... 365 Ways To Save The World. It's got me thinking... look it up....

ANTIBULLYiNG EFFORTS???

2011-03-10T20:07:00.000-08:00

“If there’s one goal of this conference, it’s to dispel the myth that bullying is just a harmless rite of passage or an inevitable part of growing up," - Obama...

um... a billion freaking fish just randomly died the other day due to a lack of oxygen and our president id making efforts to end school bullying. ...

0_0

wtf?

So... which issue seems more urgent to you? The LACK OF OXYGEN in water, which could be the sign of a much larger problem? Or insecure mini assholes picking on kids in class. The picked on kids usually end up rich or cops... I see no problem. Let the parents handle that shit. Can we fix the environment? Cause what good are a bunch of polite, well behaved kids if there's no earth for them to live on?

Um... this world is just retarded. smh...