Networking is probably the most effective and least expensive marketing method you can use to build your business or practice, especially if you do business in your local area.

A lot of business owners and practitioners I talk to say that they don’t like to network or they haven’t found it to be effective. That’s probably because they don’t know how to do it or they may have unrealistic expectations about the timing of results.

I do a lot of networking both online and off. As a natural people person who likes to talk, networking is relatively easy for me. But even if you’re a bit on the shy side or have reservations about the potential for success with networking, you can gain value from this activity if you follow certain guidelines.

Here are some tips that can ensure your networking success.

1. Choose the right venues. Not every group of people will be right for you. Choose groups where people congregate who share your interests and/or are potential clients. Chambers of Commerce, men’s and women’s organizations, networking groups, special interest groups, and associations are all potential choices. Or perhaps a MeetUp.com group in your area will appeal to you.

2. Develop relationships. Networking is not about selling, but rather developing relationships that can lead to sales or referrals. The idea is to get to know people and allow them to get to know you.

Often, people approach networking with the hope of making a sale or getting a client after one visit to an appropriate group. That’s not how it works. People do business with those they know and trust and it can take time to build up that knowledge and trust. So approach a networking event without any expectation of getting new business. Instead go with the idea of meeting new people or schmoozing with those you’ve already gotten to know.

3. Dress appropriately and professionally. Establish yourself as a successful person, which you can do by dressing the part. This does not mean that you need to wear expensive clothes, but do wear something a bit on the dressy side and leave the comfortable baggy pants at home. If necessary, get advice from an image consultant.

4. Be prepared. Bring plenty of business cards, but only give them to people who show a real interest in what you do. Brochures or printed postcards can also be effective. Also, craft a short description of what you do — no more than 10 or 15 seconds.

5. Ask questions and listen. You don’t have to talk a lot about what you do in order to find potential customers. Rather, ask people you meet questions about them and their business, then listen carefully to their answers. Find points of commonality that you can bring into the conversation.

6. Sit with people you don’t know. Many events have walk-around networking followed by a sit-down meeting of some sort. During the walk-around, do talk to people you have met before to enhance your relationship, but sit with people you don’t know in order to widen your network and meet potential customers. Here too, ask questions and listen.

7. Talk to people who are standing alone. People attend networking events to meet others. If someone is standing alone, that’s the perfect opportunity to make a new contact. You might want to start the conversation by saying, “May I join you?”

8. Move on – politely. Don’t spend all of your time talking to one person. Gather the information you need, exchange business cards, if appropriate, and move on. I often say, “I’d like to do some mixing now. It’s been a pleasure speaking to you.”

9. Give to get. Focus on what you can do for others, not what they can do for you. Perhaps you know someone who could use your prospects services. If you do, make the referral.

10. Follow up. If you make a good connection with someone, after the event, send a note saying how much you enjoyed meeting them. If appropriate, send an article or some kind of information that they might find helpful. Do not add them to your mailing list without their permission.

Networking is a process, not a one-off event. Take the time to develop relationships with people who interest you. Be proactive and invite someone to a one-to-one meeting so you can get to know them.

Remember that most business owners and practitioners are looking for connections. Be bold and step forward into their world.

• Roll your eyes and think to yourself, “BORING!”
• Zone out and think of something else.
• Say, “I’m not good with numbers.”
• Get excited about dealing with the numbers.

If you are like most entrepreneurs and practitioners, getting excited about the numbers is probably not one of your choices.

Believe it or not, despite the fact that doing business is about making money, entrepreneurs and practitioners often have little interest in learning the intricacies of managing money.

Yet the businesses that succeed financially are those with leaders who are willing to pay attention to their numbers.

A new way of looking at your finances

Perhaps I can entice you to pay more attention to what might appear to be a boring, complicated, or even overwhelming topic by helping you to see that dealing with your finances in a rational, adult way, can be a spiritual experience.

What do I mean by that? Consider these points.

1. Conscious Inner Awareness
Very few activities can connect you to your inner world more quickly or completely than dealing with your money.

Once you learn how to detach your money from your emotions, dealing with your finances can help you develop a sophisticated level of conscious inner awareness.

2. Connect to your authentic self.
Because dealing with money, on any level, can be an emotional task, learning how to recognize the emotions you are acting out and projecting onto your money, can connect you deeply to your authentic self.

For example, when you recognize that the shame you feel about your bank balance, debt, or financial behaviors is merely a habit developed in early childhood, you can approach life with greater confidence and an enhanced ability to create comfortable life stories.

3. Experience oneness.
Because money is an energy that connects billions of people around the world via the financial system, playing an active role in this energy system will allow you to be and feel more connected. This can enhance your ability to step into the money flow and manifest what you want and need while allowing you to more fully experience the feeling of oneness.

4. Earn more.
Managing your money in a conscious rather than emotional way allows you to overcome the emotional habits holding you back financially and create viable revenue-producing strategies.

I want you to succeed

When I first started on a spiritual path, my relationship with money was awful. Now, looking back, I’m grateful that I learned how to deal with both my business and personal finances in a rational way.

If I hadn’t taken the time to learn how to manage my finances and change my dysfunctional financial habits, I wouldn’t be enjoying the comfortable fear-free and stress-free life that I have today.

I understand that even if you want to learn more about managing your finances, you may not know where to start. The very thought of dealing with numbers might be overwhelming for you.

Because I have guided many people through the process of getting started with money management, I understand all of the resistance that can stop people in their tracks. I also realize that questions pop up that have to be answered.

To help you, on Thursday, May 9, at Noon Pacific, 3 PM Eastern
you can join me for a Complimentary
Coaching and Q&A Teleclass Session.

You can send me questions beforehand or join me live for real-time one-to-one coaching.
The session will be recorded for later download.

Sign up for the teleclass here

 P.S. People are often afraid of asking “stupid” or “silly” questions. In my world, there are no questions that can be labelled this way. I’m sure that if you are wondering about something, so are at least 100 other people wondering about the same thing.

So join me on May 9 and I’ll answer all of your questions about money, money and emotions, how to increase your revenues, and more.

Sign up for the teleclass now

Long before The Secret came out, I did endless affirmations, created and hung a treasure map where I could see it every day, and imagined I was acting as if I was wealthy.

I was also training myself to stop worrying, criticizing myself, and complaining, and I was cultivating an attitude of gratitude.

Did money come flying in the window? Did I suddenly have a lot of customers?

Actually, I did. I quickly made a lot of money. But because I didn’t understand the realities of business and money management, I wound up going bankrupt.

My optimism helped, but it was fantasy thinking that did me in. I had no idea that running a business required specific skills such as money management, personnel management, and basic how-to-run-a-business techniques.

Over the course of many years, as I developed business-building and money-management skills along with the thoughts, beliefs and emotions that could sustain financial comfort,  I built an enduring business that supported me nicely. What I learned, is that it takes a lot more than positive thinking to build wealth.

In order to develop and sustain financial comfort, mindset is important. And so are the real-world skills you need to deal with increasingly large sums of money.

Optimism, self-love, self-trust, generosity, gratitude, and many more internal attributes do contribute to prosperity, but it’s a fantasy if you think the rewards are automatic.

Here are some facts that can counteract fantasy thinking and allow optimism to help you build a comfortable life for yourself.

1. Money is not the key to prosperity. Prosperity is a state of mind as much as a financial position, and money doesn’t automatically cure discomforts such as low self-worth and loneliness. Money does not ensure happiness. You can have happiness and high self-worth without having to earn and manage a lot of money.

2. If you develop practical money-management skills, such as basic record keeping, you will learn to trust yourself with increasingly large amounts of money. That trust combined with the financial skills can enable you to create a healthy cash flow.

3. In order to create financial comfort through a business or professional practice, you have to understand the marketplace and learn to present your offerings in a way that will attract buyers. If you hate sales and marketing and avoid them like the plague, your chances of success are minimal, no matter what your level of optimism.

4. Successful business owners are able to recover from inevitable mistakes. Very few ventures build rapidly with no downturns. The downturns are not bad or failures, they are merely indications from the marketplace that you need to adjust your offerings.

5. It pays to have a healthy balance between optimism and scepticism so you can counteract the tendencies to make impulsive decisions with practical assessments of your ideas.

6. Asking for help from others who have more experience than you do is always a good idea. Watch what Eric Schmidt, CEO of Google, has to say about having a coach.

I’m sure that these systems have a lot of value, but there’s something they’re missing.

The pitch goes something like this, I’ve done it, and you can too. I’ll show you what I did, and all you have to do is follow the plan.

But here’s what’s missing: Building a successful business or practice requires certain personality traits and skills, and these programs rarely talk about the personality traits. Let’s look at what is required.

1. The ability to deal with uncertainty.
For a person who’s been in the job market, the financial uncertainty of business ownership can be maddening. There is no regular paycheck, and business can fluctuate from month to month. If you are looking for a guaranteed income, business ownership is not for you. Keep in mind that it often takes one to two years for a business to become profitable.

2. Discipline
The hardest part about being in business for yourself is the “yourself” part. There is no one else to tell you what to do or when to do it, and procrastination is a business killer. If you are disorganized and undisciplined, you’ll find it hard to succeed.

3. Determination and ambition
Successful business owners and practitioners don’t just “sort of” want to succeed. They have a burning desire to succeed and are passionate, determined, tenacious, and willing to do whatever it takes to reach their goal of success.

4. Resourcefulness and resiliency
New business owners or practitioners rarely have a huge supply of available cash. Succeeding depends upon your ability to make the best of what you have and to quickly recover from implemented plans that don’t work out.

5. The willingness to reach out to others for help and advice.
No matter what your stage of business development, from planning to expanding, you don’t know what you don’t know and getting advice from someone who understands your challenges can enhance your chances for success. Eric Schmidt, CEO of Google, says “Everyone needs a coach.” Watch this short video http://youtu.be/mQXiajmANYs

6. The willingness to spend a significant amount of time marketing and selling your products or services.
Many people I talked to say they would rather spend their work time doing the work they love and that they resent the time they have to spend marketing, networking, and doing administrative tasks such as bookkeeping. Yet the only way to attract customers and clients is to let them know who you are, what you have to offer, and how you can solve a problem  for them. That’s what sales and marketing is all about, and if you don’t develop these skills, you won’t have much of business. In addition, if you don’t take good care of your money, it won’t take good care of you.

7. Courage and the ability to take risks.
If fear is one of your primary emotions, and you aren’t able to cope with that fear, being in business for yourself is not a good idea.

Skills that you will need to have or develop in order to build a successful business or practice include:

• Networking and other forms of marketing
• The ability to sell your products or services from prospecting to closing a sale
• Cash flow management
• Decision making
• The ability to create strategic alliances
• An understanding of how your emotions are affecting your decisions and behavior
• There’s more, but that’s enough for now.

Although you may need some training or coaching in order to develop skills and traits you are missing, keep in mind that if you’re willing to do whatever it takes, you can develop new habits and skills that can ensure your success. It’s up to you have far you go.

For assistance getting the emotions that are holding you back out of the way, attend the upcoming teleclass, Using Be Set Free Fast to Build a Profitable Business

The results: The women with the diary with the skinny-model picture actually were not able to lose weight or gained weight, while those with the logo diaries lost weight.

The conclusion: The researchers said that “repeated exposure to models with unrealistic body sizes changes the dieter’s belief about the attainability of a thinner self.” This demotivates the dieters and they tend to move away from rather than towards their goal.

How does this relate to your finances?

You may have been told to build a treasure map filled with your dreams for success or to pick a really wealthy role model to stimulate your ability to generate more revenue.

Or perhaps you’ve heard a self-proclaimed successful business person tell you that because they achieved a huge amount of success, you can too.

Or perhaps you are trying to emulate someone you perceive “has it all.”

Like the women in the skinny-model study, the goal you are picturing may be so far out of your experience that, deep down inside, you know the goal is unattainable, and you resist taking the actions that can move you forward.

Set Realistic Goals

Many people I talk to have what I consider grandiose goals. A person making $50,000 a year might want to earn $100,000 a MONTH! That kind of goal, like the pictures of the skinny models, can be demotivating.

Grandiose goals can also exacerbate entrenched not-enough feelings, thus perpetrating a less-than financial position.

A better idea is to set a smaller goal, such as increasing your income by 10% or 20%. Doing this allows you to develop a practical strategy to reach the goal. You can figure out how many more items you need to sell, how many new clients you need to add, or how by much you should raise your rates.

I like to use a spread sheet where I can do if-then scenarios. I can test different prices for my products or services and varying numbers of units sold to see what it takes to reach a specific income goal.

Then I can determine if there is a market for what I’m offering at the price I want to charge, and I can adjust my marketing accordingly.

Smaller goals also raise your chances of experiencing genuine success and give you the opportunity to adapt to managing increased revenue.

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Upcoming Webinar: How to Use Be Set Free Fast (BSFF) to Build a Profitable Business
February 27 at Noon Pacific, 3 PM Eastern, 8 PM BST (London)
Learn how to use Be Set Free Fast (BSFF) to remove resistance to sales and marketing, deal with administrative tasks, overcome financial issues, and more.
Click here for more information and to register

Because of everything that’s going on in the world, it’s important that you use all available tools to help you deal emotionally with current events, and one of the most effective is the energy psychology technique Be Set Free Fast (BSFF). This simple technique allows you to quickly shift your emotions from fear and anxiety to a more peaceful state.

I first started using BSFF in 2002. I had been using EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) with my clients and for myself, then decided to have a few sessions with Larry Nims, the creator of BSFF, to see what it was like. I immediately found it to be effective and liked it better than EFT because I could treat so many more issues and subtleties of issues in rapid succession. I still like it better because no tapping is involved, which makes it easier to use in a meditative state, which I prefer.

In my book, Build Your Money Muscles, I introduced a condensed version of BSFF that I call the power word technique. The main difference between the two is that the Instructions to Your Subconscious, which are an important part of the technique, are more complete with BSFF. The official manual for BSFF, which I wrote with Larry, also has detailed instructions for how to craft the statements that are an essential part of this technique.

Today, I’d like to offer you a treatment for some of the feelings you may be experiencing because of current world conditions. Rather than explain the whole technique here, I’m going to suggest you read the Instructions to Your Subconscious that you’ll find on ProsperityPlace.com in an article about the power word. Read the article now.

The Treatment:
It’s really quite simple, just read the statements below and where it says Power Word, use the word you choose as directed in the article linked above on ProsperityPlace.com. If you’re already familiar with BSFF, use your Cue Word.

I suggest you do this while sitting in a comfortable position.

First, take a moment to take a few deep breaths and tune in to your physical body. Become aware of any areas of tension, such as your abdomen, shoulders, forehead or chest. If you feel areas of tension, put all of your awareness in the tension. Take a deep breath, and repeat your power word (or cue word) until you feel the tension dissipate. When you feel the urge, take additional deep breaths.

Now read the following statements, either aloud or silently, and always include your power word. You can repeat any of the statements or the whole treatment multiple times, and you can also add any statements that come to your mind. If EFT is your preference, you can adapt the statements below.

• The current economy scares me. Power word.
• I’m so afraid I’m going to run out of money. Power word.
• It makes me angry that I have so little control over what’s happening economically. Power word.
• It makes me sad that I have so little control over what’s happening. Power word.
• It upsets me that I’m vulnerable to erratic weather conditions. Power word.
• I feel so vulnerable. Power word.
• I feel so powerless. Power word.
• I feel so vulnerable and sometimes just want to hide from the world. Power word.
• I wish all the turmoil would stop. Power word.
• I crave peace of mind. Power word.
• I crave peace of mind and it is difficult to find it. Power word.
• I’m afraid that if I let go of my fear and anxiety, I won’t know what to do. Power word.
• It feels as if I have to be afraid. Power word.
• I release my need to think about the future and hold onto my fear. Power word.
• I give myself permission to let go of my fear of the future .Power word.
• I am willing to let go of my fear of the future. Power word.
• I want to let go of my fear of the future.Power word.
• I embrace the opportunity that chaotic change provides. Power word.
• I have the ability to rise above current events and find solutions to whatever appears as a challenge. Power word.
• I look forward to using challenges as a way to grow strong. Power word.

Now take a deep breath in and out.

Keep in mind that instructions given in the Be Set Free Fast manual are much more complete. What I’ve given you here is a good way to start.

I immediately thought about the book I have been writing for the last two years about my journey to physical, emotional, and financial health. This story has been difficult for me to write because, along the way, I passed through many interesting but uncomfortable dramas. I realized that the time had come to finish the story.

For the next week, I worked on the book with the goal of finishing it by my December 30 birthday. The toughest part was recounting the story of when I had to close the business that I loved so much, Joan’s Crystals, and declare bankruptcy (in 1989). As I wrote, I was filled with emotion, but knew I was finally reaching the point where I could let go of the painful memory.

As I read through the book one more time, I clearly saw a pattern that I had lived through over and over again. I would find myself in financial trouble and ask my parents or my brother, Marc, for help. What I realized this time, as I reread the story, was that I had lived the story of a wounded little girl who knew no other way to reach out and say, “Please touch me.”

As I experienced the feelings, I understood that the wounded little girl was still playing a part in creating my life stories and keeping me from reaching my full potential. In order to maintain her identity, I had to hold myself back. Even though I have experienced a healthy level of success, there have been a lot of ups and downs and I’ve always had the feeling that I need to hide part of me.

At that moment, I realized that I no longer had to hold onto or live, in any way, the story of the wounded little girl. I also realized how much power we have to create whatever story is necessary to express our deepest, hidden emotions. I knew this before, but this time I understood it on a deep, cellular level.

Years ago, I drew a picture of “Joanie” as a wizard – holding a crystal wand, of course. The picture has been on my altar for the last year, and now I see that the playful wizard is volunteering to be in charge. The story has changed, and I look forward to its unfolding. What a great way to start the year!

So now I’d like to ask you, what story have you been living that you would like to change? Is there your wounded inner child running the show and holding onto beliefs and emotions that no longer hold true? Are you willing to step out of that familiar role into one that may be filled with uncertainty because you don’t know how it’s going to play out?

Inside of you is a healthy adult waiting to express itself. That part of you knows what to do in order for you to succeed, but in order for it to be in charge, you have to be willing to let go of the emotions behind your old story. You can keep the narrative, if it’s a good story, but let go of the pain and fill yourself with forgiveness and gratitude instead.

And most importantly, reach out and connect to others, especially those who are willing to see your light, your talent, and the value you bring to the world.

In a nutshell here they are:

1. Craving money or feeling poor is similar to the feeling of wanting to be touched. This forms in early childhood because of inadequate bonding and lack of affection.

2. Any kind of childhood abuse, including mild but frequent emotional abuse, can lead to feelings of low self-worth that are acted out through underearning, debting, overspending, and other financial behaviors.

Because this is a fairly complex issue, I’d like to suggest that you listen to the audio below. This audio, which is about 15 minutes long, is taken from the introduction to the December 6th Peace of Mind & Prosperity program teleclass.\

 Download

At the beginning of each of the Peace of Mind & Prosperity teleclasses, I present ideas and experiences that can help program participants. The introductions are followed by interactive coaching with participants. Read more about the Peace of Mind & Prosperity Program and the new Free Trial.

I hope you’ll take a few moments to listen to this audio. The information has impacted virtually everyone with whom I have shared it. I’ll be telling you soon about a teleclass I’ll be doing next month on this topic.

If you find the audio interesting, I hope you’ll comment on the blog post below and share it with your friends.

Once you get over the excitement of winning, you’ll have to make some practical decisions. You’ll also have to deal with a whole lot of emotional issues. If you haven’t thought about both of these, then you aren’t serious about achieving a high level of wealth.

By examining the issues that I’m going to propose here, you’ll be able to discover some of your blocks to creating wealth.

The Practical Decisions

On a practical level, ask these questions:

1. After finding out that you won, who would be the first person you would call and why?

2. You will need a financial advisor to help you make some decisions. Who will you call? If you’re planning on rapidly building wealth, it’s a good idea to start interviewing financial advisers now in order to find one you trust.

I have interviewed many financial advisors to find out how they work, with whom they work, and what kind of fees they charge. One of the advisors I spoke with had a client who had won the lottery. She said that sorting everything out was, in her words, a nightmare because of the number of decisions that had to be made quickly.

3. How much money do you really need for lifestyle expenses? In order to answer this question, you need to examine your values and determine how you want to live your life.

For example, if you have been dreaming about a big house with lots of fancy furnishings and you are seriously interested in living sustainably, those two goals might not match. Also, you might not want to take on the responsibilities of caring for a huge property.

Examine your wants and imagine them as having happened to see if they are really congruent with your values.

5.What will you do with the money you don’t need for lifestyle expenses? Will you create a foundation, give money to relatives, help friends? Will you just give it away or will you create conditions for the recipients?

4. Read this post offering advice to Mega Millions lottery winners that outlines practical steps lottery winners need to take. http://www.lotterypost.com/news/170744 (I had no idea there was this kind of site available for lottery discussions.)

The Inner Work You Need to Do

I guarantee that if you win the lottery or achieve sudden wealth, your emotional life will be turned upside down. It’s often the emotional jolt that causes so many lottery winners to burn through their winnings and find themselves right back where they started.

I’ve worked with a number of clients who either inherited $500,000 or more or whose business grew very rapidly, and they all needed help deciding how to create rational spending and investing plans. I helped them both deal with the emotions and find the right team of advisors.

Any kind of rapid income acceleration can cause disorientation and confusion because often the newfound financial position goes against your established financial identity. The question becomes, “Who am I as a wealthy person?”

Here’s another group of questions to ask:

• How will I deal with requests for money from family, friends, and strangers?
• Are my relationships with family and friends strong enough for me to trust the sincerity of their reactions?
• Am I afraid that my newfound wealth will alienate me from my peer group?
• Will I be afraid of making poor financial decisions and losing what I have gained?
• Will I authentically feel like a wealthy person or will the money just cover up ingrained less-than feelings?
• What can I do to allow myself to feel wealthy before the money comes?
• What scares me about rapid wealth creation?

Here’s the bottom line: Are you ready emotionally and practically to handle wealth?

Perhaps you’re unhappy about your financial behaviors — like overspending, avoiding saving, or being generally vague — but you don’t talk about these topics. .

Not talking about money can cost you big bucks.

Why People Don’t Talk About Money
Most people avoid talking about the specifics of their finances. They might complain about their situation or the general economy without ever discussing their own numbers – how much they have, how much they need, etc.

Here are some reasons why:
1. Shame and fear of being judged. Unless you have a really strong and positive self-image, there’s a good chance that you judge yourself as inadequate vis-à-vis your finances. As a result, you assume others will criticize you for not managing your money well. To avoid embarrassment, you avoid the discussion.

2. You don’t know the language of finance. Just as some people have a minimal emotional vocabulary, the same holds true regarding financial terms. Since these are not commonly used in everyday conversation, you may not be comfortable using words like cash flow, budgets, or money-management.

3. Numbers scare you. For some people, numbers are natural. They like to think, talk, and strategize about numbers. For those who are more right-brained thinkers, working with numbers and talking about them may seem foreign and unnatural. However, with practice, it’s possible to learn to embrace and even love working with numbers, especially because doing so can significantly improve your revenue.

4. Financial discussions with loved ones often devolve into fights. It’s not unusual for two people who live or work together to have different financial philosophies and behaviors. One person might be frugal, the other freespending, and finding a middle ground can be difficult.

The Advantages of Talking about Money

Talking about money has many advantages:

• You’ll earn more. If you are afraid to talk about money, you are probably undercharging for your products or services.
• When you can talk about your finances, you can learn about managing cash flow and other financial skills that will allow your business or practice to grow and expand.
• You will be better able to get specific about how you want to be paid.
• Asking for money will be easier.
• Clients will perceive you as strong, focused, and mature.
• You will stop the thought loops that go through your mind about your finances.

Steps to Take

1. Set the intention of learning to talk about money.

2. In my book, Build Your Money Muscles, I talk about keeping a Prosperity Journal. Use this journal to write about your money problems, concerns, and questions. Be aware of the emotional responses in your body as you do this.

3. Make a list of what you perceive are the reasons you have trouble talking about money. This will uncover some of your hidden money issues.

4. Tell someone you trust that you are learning to be more honest and open about your finances and ask them if they have an interest in doing this. If they are, set up a “prosperity buddy” relationship where you agree to learn and speak about finances. You can use my book, Build Your Money Muscles, as a guide.

5. Visit and participate in online forums such as the one at www.FrugalVillage.com.

6. Join the Peace of Mind & Prosperity program. This is a safe and non-judgmental place where you can anonymously discuss any of your financial concerns.