tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3410580763494059332022-11-25T12:57:12.159+01:00REWIRING THE SOUL with Gabriella Kortsch, Ph.D.My other books: The Tao of Spiritual Partnership & The Power of Your Heart: Loving the Self & Emotional Unavailability & Neediness are @ Amazon. "Rewiring the Soul" is now also available in German & Spanish.Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger1520125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-341058076349405933.post-75337397592374248432021-08-16T12:44:00.003+02:002021-10-01T13:09:32.879+02:00You Cannot Be Happy Tomorrow: A Brief Look at Stress & TraumaThe reason
it is impossible to be happy tomorrow as the title implies, is because you
never actually manage to “arrive at” tomorrow. You are always “in” today. If you
are not aware, and not here now, because you are elsewhere or elsewhen in
your mind, then we might speculate that your mind is being run by your
subconscious. And if your mind is being run by your subconscious, we can deduce
that Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-341058076349405933.post-91975610322566650352021-07-12T12:57:00.003+02:002021-09-01T13:06:16.178+02:00The Art of Self-Regulation If no one
ever showed you how to walk, or if no one ever walked in your presence, you
would probably still be able to learn on your own, but it would take much
longer. In other words, having a role model or a step-by-step plan makes it
infinitely easier to reach your goal.
It’s the
same thing with self-regulation, one of the cornerstones of emotional maturity.
By knowing how to self-regulate, Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-341058076349405933.post-66793219246625058472021-06-21T17:53:00.012+02:002021-08-11T16:53:26.478+02:00Control Dramas & Codependence: Draining Your Life EnergyThe topic
of drama in our lives – particularly in our closest relationships – is one I
touched on several years ago with The Adrenaline Rush of Relationship
Drama. Now I’d
like to specifically examine control dramas, their impact on our lives, as
manifested in many different types of relationships, as well as the manner in
which they drain us and therefore steal our energy.
Control and
its roleUnknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-341058076349405933.post-62669493653452513302021-02-09T12:45:00.001+01:002021-02-11T12:55:28.490+01:00A Purpose-Driven Life In this time of great turmoil, with the pandemic, with looming economic
problems in every country, increasing hunger, and difficulties in having access
to clean water and education, refugees living in desperation and squalor
because we of the first world are not doing what is right, not to mention other
minor matters such as the ludicrous process of Brexit, the humiliatingly
preposterous US Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-341058076349405933.post-89074275525634216222020-09-16T17:05:00.006+02:002020-09-16T17:21:29.136+02:00Fatherless Women & Motherless MenNote: this is an excerpt from Chapter 6 of my book “Emotional
Unavailability & Neediness: Two Sides of the Same Coin”. The lack of the opposite
gender parent in a child's life can have numerous significant ramifications as
we shall see in this chapter. The parent may have died physically, or is 'dead'
because he/she is absent from the child's life in a meaningful way, Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-341058076349405933.post-36369893736428905262020-07-14T18:33:00.001+02:002020-08-05T18:55:36.796+02:00The Unlived Life of the Parent
Jung wrote: Nothing
affects the life of the child so much as the unlived life of its parent. What
you do not become conscious of in yourself, will find a secret life in your
child, and therefore it is truly your responsibility - not only to yourself,
but also to your children - to not cease in exploring your inner self.
It is crucial to
understand that the part of you that you, Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-341058076349405933.post-23704081301817312692020-05-15T02:30:00.004+02:002020-05-15T17:46:26.774+02:00The Big Picture
It’s been
about seven weeks since we woke up to our new reality. Distancing. Isolation.
Self-quarantine. Thoughts of contagion. Thoughts of worry, anger, fear, rage,
desperation, and loneliness. Impatience with our particular circumstances –
whatever they might be. Cabin fever. Masks, gloves, sanitizing lotion, Lysol,
and bleach. Distress, pain, and despair. And back we go to fear and angerUnknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-341058076349405933.post-11819326949760444302020-04-14T13:20:00.000+02:002020-06-08T17:17:34.803+02:00Rediscovering a Sense of Adventure in Your Life
As a young pre-teen living in Switzerland
and Canada, I remember vividly feeling a sense of almost unbearable excitement
thinking about how my life would unfold. Now mind you, I had no specific
thought about the exact things that
would happen – this was not an exercise in goal planning – rather, it was a
sense of unadulterated joy about that
which could be, but which was still veiled; not Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-341058076349405933.post-35395643193578710912020-02-11T11:48:00.000+01:002020-02-26T11:53:51.842+01:00Why Love Isn’t Always Love
Almost everyone knows the marvel of falling
in love. Similarly, most of us have experienced the pain of love ending. What
many of us don’t know is why love is not always love, even when the emotions of
falling in love, or the pain of losing love are clearly very strong.
Let’s examine some of the ways in which we
fall in love:
The chemistry between you and other person
is so unusually Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-341058076349405933.post-74270581216770721042020-01-14T11:55:00.000+01:002020-02-26T12:02:52.440+01:00The Consequences of Not Loving the Self
** Note: this is a brief excerpt from Chapter
6 of my book “The Power of Your Heart: Loving the Self”
It's a general
rule that no one becomes aware of the consequences of not loving the self until
he is well down the road of not doing so. When realization dawns, or in a
session with a therapist, it becomes obvious that poor self-image, lack of good
care for the self, and spending most ofUnknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-341058076349405933.post-5060275213711909522019-12-02T18:54:00.003+01:002020-08-19T18:15:19.114+02:00The Adrenaline Rush of Relationship Drama
There never seems to be a short supply of articles telling
us about toxic relationships, trauma bonding, or just plain dysfunctional
behaviour in our interaction with others. Why are we hooked and beguiled into
these situations with such seeming ease and why do they appear to occur with
such frequency in most demographics? The young, the old, the rich, the poor,
the educated, and the less Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-341058076349405933.post-39320582620853441822019-11-12T12:06:00.000+01:002020-02-26T12:14:34.755+01:00Friendship: Its Mundane, Growth-Enhancing & Sacred Nature
How do you number your friends? Is it the
followers you can count on social media? Is it the people you could easily
invite to a dinner party? Is it the number of people that call you frequently?
Or is it the people who, in the words of Proust, make you grateful, because
they contribute to your happiness; because “they are the charming gardeners who
make our souls blossom”?
The early Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-341058076349405933.post-4288752433014317742019-10-15T12:22:00.000+02:002020-02-26T12:25:15.455+01:00Using Every Tool Within Reach to Grow
For anyone who is consciously following a
path that leads to greater growth, understanding, and wisdom, it could be said
that the small details of daily life are what can most irritate, stress, anger,
bewilder, or simply defeat us – albeit momentarily. Yet, in these small
details, we are offered the gift of tools
that can serve us well in our quest for growth, just as a hammer can help us
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-341058076349405933.post-16388751588635635762019-09-17T13:16:00.000+02:002019-10-03T13:20:40.328+02:00Four Tips For When You’re Hanging at the End of Your Rope
Having hit rock bottom is generally considered to be one of
the most difficult moments in a person’s life. It can be for any number of
reasons: professional, personal (relationships, family), financial, or health,
and frequently several or all of these are intertwined, making it feel like a
nightmare from which you are not able to wake. If you have no tools to help you
deal with this, Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-341058076349405933.post-68145396121938022802019-08-20T13:28:00.000+02:002019-10-03T13:31:06.762+02:00After the Honeymoon: Communicating with Soul
The honeymoon might end months, years, or even decades after
the commitment you made to each other. And when it does, partnerships or
marriages that survive, will have generally learned new ways of communicating in
ways that involve the soul of both partners, ways that weren’t necessarily a part
of the earlier period of the relationship.
At the beginning, so much is easy due to the
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-341058076349405933.post-67286379589246397642019-07-16T19:00:00.000+02:002019-08-13T19:28:38.914+02:00Reaching Towards What You (Still) Might Become
Have you ever wondered about the you that might have been if you had studied archaeology instead of law?
Or if you had married John instead of Richard, or Melanie instead of Liz? Or
how about the you that might have
been if you had taken up that rather challenging and even frightening
opportunity to lead a team of investors of your firm, but it meant moving to
India? Or how about the you Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-341058076349405933.post-12710135030355236082019-06-11T17:38:00.000+02:002019-08-13T18:46:05.521+02:00Running Away From Life … Or Not
It’s
the beginning of yet another day in your life, and it’s once again - as happens every day - an opportunity to make some
symbolic new beginnings. Starting some things in a new way as this day moves forward, is a decision only you can make, but it is also a
decision that can have a major impact on your life and well-being. Imagine you
have found yourself drinking or smoking too much. OrUnknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-341058076349405933.post-8701032544679005022019-05-14T13:07:00.000+02:002019-05-24T13:11:16.136+02:00So Why Exactly are You Still in That Relationship?
It all started so brilliantly. You were so very much in
love. Your partner was just what you had been looking for, for so very long,
and you felt so fortunate to have found him/her. You realized just how
incredible he/she was, especially – so you told yourself – once he/she got out
of his own way to see his/her own magnificence. And you knew; you absolutely
knew, that you would give him/her Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-341058076349405933.post-25597533654860784292019-04-15T12:42:00.000+02:002019-11-13T17:05:36.081+01:00Empathy vs Altruistic Love & Compassion
Do you feel
the suffering of others? Do you suffer
when others experience emotional pain? Are you able to put yourself in their
shoes as they go through an agonizing process of deep anguish? Can you
sometimes pick up on what others are
feeling as you come into their presence (or simply as you hear their voice on
the phone) and then really live – in some figurative fashion – what they are Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-341058076349405933.post-81518688776956109212019-03-12T11:32:00.000+01:002019-03-29T11:38:36.941+01:00Reaching Towards What You (Still) Might Become
Have you ever wondered about the you that might have been if you had studied archaeology instead of law?
Or if you had married John instead of Richard, or Melanie instead of Liz? Or
how about the you that might have
been if you had taken up that rather challenging and even frightening
opportunity to lead a team of investors of your firm, but it meant moving to
India? Or how about the you Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-341058076349405933.post-58038846938662626532019-02-12T11:34:00.000+01:002019-03-05T11:57:46.780+01:00Yearning For Love
If you thought I only read about neuroscience and
spirituality, you are quite wrong. I also read novels and occasionally even
peek into a tabloid. That is how I became aware of a 40-ish woman who had built
up a very lucrative and successful life for herself and her children. She was
twice divorced and yearned for a new partner and true love. Given the nature of
her high-octane profession in Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-341058076349405933.post-85177813063221537842019-01-22T12:08:00.000+01:002019-03-05T12:14:34.570+01:00Sexuality in Spiritual Relationships
Did you think that if you start following a more ‘spiritual’ path,
your sex life would become tabu? Or that you would need to ‘give it up’, in
order to conform to whatever precepts you believed living a spiritual life
imply?
Not so.
I’ve written an entire book about spiritual partnerships – The
Tao of Spiritual Partnership
- as opposed to conventional relationships, and it is preciselyUnknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-341058076349405933.post-13056236663749796492018-12-11T12:16:00.000+01:002019-03-05T12:19:14.914+01:00The Nature of True Intimacy
Recently I read the following quote by Upendo Kupita Juu: “Intimacy
is not entirely physical. In fact, it can have no physical interaction at all.
For an intimate relationship to take place, allow someone into your thoughts.
Let them hold and caress your feelings. Let them be intimate with your mind.
Allow for the emotional intimacy to be the reason for passion to be bred. Now that intimacy Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-341058076349405933.post-85620454672084916522018-11-02T19:16:00.000+01:002019-03-05T12:04:22.191+01:00A Portrait of a Healthy Relationship
If you want to scale Kilimanjaro or Everest, you might spend
some time looking at images of others who have succeeded in the process, and
reading books describing how they went about doing it. If you want to create a
garden, you might begin by looking at glossy gardening books to get a feel for
what depicts that which you have in your heart, or you might get some advice
from a landscape Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-341058076349405933.post-15023491934062404902018-10-02T19:09:00.001+02:002021-08-07T18:03:49.224+02:00How Your Degree of Emotional Maturity Influences Your Partner Choices
Have you ever stopped to think why you fell in love with
that person when you were 16? And that other person when you were 21? And then,
of course, the one you married when you were 26? Why did you fall in love with
precisely that one? Let’s not forget the one you fell in love with after your
divorce. And perhaps there was someone else after that as well. And perhaps
even others. What was Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0