Pun Intended

Pulling hair out...

2007-10-30T15:43:15-07:00

"Michael Baker, who made news last year when district officials told him he couldn’t teach history from the present backwards, has not been in classrooms since April 18.

His abrupt departure apparently came on the heels of a video he showed to a geography class called “Baghdad ER.”

The documentary film chronicles life in the emergency room of a combat support hospital in Baghdad and includes graphic footage."

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Add another one to the list. A teacher does something different, memorable, tries to bring some relevance into the classroom - and they are fired for it.

I will still never get over the buy-out that took place at my Alma Mater shortly after I graduated.

What REALLY kills me about the article, is that a bunch of people called this Vietnam veteran anti-American, a communist, and only showing an anti-military point of view. Interesting. Let's see what the department of defense thinks...

Defense Link review of "Baghdad ER"

"It is a poignant testament to the sacrifice of American troops and the dedication of military medical personnel."

- Defense Link News

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GEEZ!!!!

"State of the Classroom" public address

2007-10-15T16:23:04-07:00

I'm not a nice teacher when I think students are being lazy. I am neither sympathetic nor compassionate to a student who will raise his or her hand and claim "I don't get it," and then answer "no" when I ask if they read the directions. None the less, every day I hear at least one moan that I am "too hard." FYI: my classwork is not difficult.

Here is where the majority have claimed that I am too hard: because I require my regular 10th grade students to read twenty novels a year. I count the novels we read in class that are district-required (4 total), but for the most part, their twenty is comprised of novels they choose. I even keep charts in the back room with sticky stars on it to keep track of how many each student has read. Yes, fat novels count as more than one.

With parent-teacher conferences imminent on the horizon, I am mentally preparing myself for the barrage of parents whose lovely children have told them that I am unreasonable and too demanding.

Here is my rebuttal: I stand behind my decision 100%. With very little homework other than to read 30 minutes a night, I expect my students to make the effort to explore my classroom library, the school library and the public library in order to find genres and authors that they love. There are a list of new favorites compiled by the students on my wall.

"The rate of decline in literary reading is steepest among teenagers and twenty-somethings, who are most likely to be distracted by computers, text messaging and video games."

I have had night sweats several times this year that I am setting my students up for failure. But then I wake up and realize this is not case. My students who did not read their three books this past semester, had "F's" prior to my inputting the novel grades, (100 pts each). More students raised failing grades because of the novel grades.

"A national poll conducted in August found the average American claimed to have read four books in the past year. One in four adults admitted to reading no books at all."

I think it is frightening that people don't read for fun anymore - and it makes my entire day when a student comes up to me and tells me they have found a book that they LOVE. Some of these include the Twilight series by Stephanie Myer, The Pond by Robert Murphy, sports books by Mike Lupica, and the Dharma Bums by Jack Kerouac. I had one girl take on Great Expectations and a boy tackle Les Mis. I am so proud of them.

So... am I too difficult? I don't think so, but none the less the anxiety that some students manage to instill in me over their "I don't get its" and "I don't reads - I'm too busy's" still puts me both on the edge and on the defensive. Either way, I'm not changing my policy. Too busy? Put down the game cube and read thirty minutes before falling asleep.

And no, you may not "switch teachers" because you don't want to read. SUCK IT UP.

See, mean.

"Nowadays we're in this sort of 'snippet society,' where we don't read entire works anymore - we read excerpts," says Tony Weller of Sam Weller's bookstore in downtown Salt Lake City. "It worries me a lot. The reduction of reading in our culture does have real social and political implications. We will be stupider."

Quotes from: Written Off? -- article from Salt Lake City Tribune

"Jesus Coming"

2007-10-11T17:26:16-07:00

I am never going to make the mistake of discussing my religious beliefs in ANY public arena, but it would probably insult somebody's intelligence to think that they wouldn't assume I was born into a Christian family, (WASP is written on my forehead).

With that being said - I do not like it when ANY group I assume membership of has an outspoken representative who is an idiot. Even if the fault is relatively minor.

I was driving home - Cabot to Little Rock - today after school, when I pass a car with "Jesus Coming" written on the back bumper. Fine. Promote whatever message you want.

As I passed them and looked back in my rear-view mirror, I saw that they had attempted to write "Jesus" again across the front bumper, ambulance-style. Unlike ambulances, though, the name had not been reversed, so that when viewed, it was completely backwards.

So my plea is this: Don't mix your mental pitfalls with my (or any) beliefs in a public forum, and keep your religion... (whatever it may be) ...out of your stupidity!!

AND IF YOU'RE GOING TO MIX BEING RELIGIOUS AND BEING STUPID THEN FOR GOD'S SAKE (LITERALLY) - DON'T ADVERTISE IT!!!! It embarrasses the rest of us.

Into the Labyrinth

2007-08-12T11:12:48-07:00

I've now got approx. 20 of my 60 professional development hours as well a semi-completed class room. I've begun to have dreams about the first day of school; that's how I know I'm getting anxious/eager/let's get it over with!

On Friday night I watched Pan's Labyrinth with Michael and Matt. I LOVED it. It reminded me a lot of the Jim Henson version because both had the plot structure of a girl trying to save her baby brother and escape various tyrannical elements: military dictators, parents, etc.

I really want to show this movie after we've reviewed some basic concepts like allusion, (to Greek mythology, Catholic ritual, etc.), symbolism, parallel structure, moral allegory, religious allegory, fable, as well as the connection to history and art with the Spanish civil war, WWII, and Guernica. Which could then lead to some wonderful discussions about the relationship between art (film, canvas, poetry...) to world events and the human response to both.

I would really like to show this movie when we begin to read Antigone, so that we can talk about the references to Greek myth, (the pomegranite, Pan/Bacchus, etc.) as well as the tragic heroine, which I would argue Ofelia is a perfect model for. I smell a Venn diagram somewhere.

The most academic part of our film discussion on Friday, though, had to be when we decided that the Pan monster looked a lot like the Tool guy from a video off the Undertow album. See what you think:

Swept Off My Feet

2007-07-23T13:25:23-07:00

I always knew I picked the wrong age group. When I was younger, I wanted to work in a nursing home as something like a program director, but I ended up going the route of teacher, (obviously). BIG MISTAKE.

I went to my grandfather's nursing home this afternoon to eat watermelon with him at a summer party. As I was carrying the plates of everyone at our table to the trash, (foam plates soaked and sloshing with watermelon juice, it's amazing my shirt is not pink), an elderly man stopped me and said, "Thank you, thank you. I assumed that I was either carrying his plate, or he was senile, so I quickly replied, "You're welcome!" Then he said, "I'm thanking you for improving the scenery." Haha I'm so good at picking up older men!

When I came back to the table he asked if he could sing me a "little tune," so I said sure. He then, in perfect pitch, serenaded me with this:

I have an ear for music
And I have an eye for a maid
I link a pretty girlie
With each pretty tune that's played
They go together like sunny weather
Goes with the month of May
I've studied girls and music
So I'm qualified to say:

A pretty girl is like a melody
That haunts you night and day

Just like the strain of a haunting refrain
She'll start upon a marathon
And run around your brain

You can't escape, she's in your memory
By morning, night and noon

She will leave you and then come back again
A pretty girl is just like a pretty tune

- Irving Berlin

I told him no one had ever sang to me before, and he said, "Well, they should have a long time ago." I think I found my new boyfriend! Sorry, Michael.

What a beautiful compliment! My whole week is made, now.

Round Three!

2007-07-20T15:34:11-07:00

Two weeks ago my Motorola Razor died beyond rehabilitation, Tuesday night my computer crashed permanently, Wednesday Michael's car battery died while we were out replacing my computer, and then today, that!

Don't come near me, I'm going to be struck by lightning!

So I'm leaving school today, (I exit as fast as the kids), and I'm walking out to my car, SO EXCITED TO HAVE THE AFTERNOON FREE. In the morning, I am usually the first one in the back lot, (I make a lot of copies because I don't use the text book much, and I feel like a copy hog so I try to beat the other teachers,) thus I take the first spot closest to the sidewalk. I make sure to pull into a row with single spaces, because one day when I pulled up into a double row, I came out to find a girl in a car so close to my back hatch I was looking for scratch marks, so I have since been parking in the row that does not put two cars in a front to back. This did not help. The kid parked next to me drove across my front bumpter. My car is only a month old! Sad.

At least I looked cute today - I wore a new dress. And Harry Potter comes out tonight. Focus on the positive...

Big button over-all dress from Impulse, Banana baby blue cardigan, costume jewelry, white strappy sandals, (flat for teaching: see, I've learned), new french pedi and a basic mani. Top it off with wet, I just showered five minutes ago, it's 6:50AM and I'm running late hair, perfect! Tonight I'll ditch the cardigan and the flats for some black pumps with cork soles. It's good to be able to take your mind off things and focus on what really matters:

Summer clothes, and the fact that I love x infinity Adrienne Rich.

Going nuts!

2007-07-17T16:28:31-07:00

In case you missed the "case of the cracking coconuts," go here to read all the milky details. Maybe you had to be there. Good thing I can relate my crazy personal life in anecdotes pertaining to serious current event memoirs in class! And yes, that is a coconut in the sink, and yes, he is hitting it with a hammer, and no, that didn't break it. I think I have some students whose heads are as thick as that... I kid I kid.

Maybe.

In other non-news, Michael got a Chinese water dragon and named it Wheetabix, after the cereal produced by an Australian (UK?) company known as the Sanitarium corporation. Is this a throw back to 1950's companies that had crazy names that all sounded like toilet bowl cleaners or is it really a nod towards a place that Michel Foucault would have written about? Crazy Brits. Is that PC?

I've also made some interesting discoveries. Apparently reading Medea in class is gold, but Lysistrata does not go over well. That's ok. I still find "woolly female logic" hysterical. Maybe that just proves what a geek I am; among other things.

Finally: yes, I have a lazy eye in pictures. Leave me alone.

"You're only coming out because you came back in"

2007-07-12T18:29:30-07:00

for jane

225 days under grass
and you know more than I.

they have long taken your blood,
you are a dry stick in a basket.

is this how it works?

in this room
the hours of love
still make shadows.

when you left
you took almost
everything.

I kneel in the nights
before tigers
that will not let me be.

what you were
will not happen again.

the tigers have found me
and I do not care.

----Charles Bukowski

___________________________

Yesterday was brilliant. Today was like rubbing my face on a brillow pad. Must everything be a pendulum? Sometimes I'm not so sure I'd rather just sit on the bench that revolves rather than experience the carousel affect.

Since the two weeks post-graduation and the 4th of July have been my only real holidays this season, this is the first summer I have not felt like a child, and it is strange. Except for that one summer when my childhood ended. That mile marker was twenty.

This summer still stands out because I have not seen a lightening bug, and that seems to have made all of the difference. Do they disappear when you age?

___________________________

Back in the years when I kept a live journal, (I just re-read two years worth of one of them, what a waste of an hour), I was able to post what music I was listening to, and that feature seemed to express more than anything I ever wrote. I think typepad should implement it, too.

It frightens me how much of my life I have forgotten. I had so many vague references to things that I assume were fun occurences, inside jokes, etc. and now I have no idea what I was talking about. Other things jar my memory like a semi colliding into my brain. And ouch, it hurts.

The teacher as mysterious "other" IE starring myself as Ms. Cruella De-EvilTeacher

2007-07-10T17:10:42-07:00

I've always been very fascinated by literary studies that observe how one group of people treats another group as "the mysterious other," often approaching them through one of the following means: emphasizing cultural exoticism, enslaving them, eradicating them, or any of the above + or - villainizing them. Today, in the world of educational "mysterious otherness" and summer school, I feel like the villain.

Anytime I complain about the frustrations of unmotivated students, arguing with students, reprimanding students, flat out punishing students, and/or any other similar classroom agenda-struggles, the thing I am MOST frustrated with all boils back to being cast as a villain. Or at least feeling like one.

"Otherness" between teachers and students bothers me. One major reason for this is because I am still quite young. If my mom were still around, I think she would still try and give me a curfew when I go home. It was not that long ago that I was a teenager. Really not THAT long ago, not long ago as in half of the clothes in my closet have been there since high school, (some from Jr. High), and they are still "in style." Yes, I measure things by the metric units of fashion longevity. Shut up.

For this, and other assorted reasons, I do not feel a huge sense of separation between myself and students. We are all people, we all want to have a good day, we all have "rough lives" (as one student put it today) for one reason or other to deal with, (and no, I do not believe you should be granted classwork autonomy because you a.work a lot, b. have a kid, or c. anything else. No one made it anywhere by asking for a free pass. Sorry.).

Thus, it makes sense to me that a classroom should function with everyone seeking a level of harmonious existence and involvement. Hold on don't call me an idealist schmuck. I'm not stupid, (at least not for that reason). I'm aware this is not the case. I can handle that. Students want to chat, somedays they don't feel like working, yeah yeah beentheredonethat. I got told to sit in the corner a lot in elementary school; all of my neighbors were my BFFs.

So when I have to go to a student and address them privately about the problems with their disruptive and otherwise not-doing-the-work behavior, I see it as a (semi) friendly reminder of why they are there, (the answer being painfully obvious when the case is summer school), and it can be left at that if the behavior is corrected. But when this doesn't work and I have to raise my voice, write referrals, take away privileges, etc., and I am met with resistance, attitude, or any other form of visible disgust, I begin to feel like the villainized "other." I am no longer, (if I ever was), "human," I am an evil war mongering demon teacher with green skin and fangs that nobody wants to see or be near, which, even though it may be effective towards getting an assignment finished, is still not a good feeling. I signed up for this?

It's the times when I'm mustering all of my internal stern-ness to tell a student to be quiet, and they are looking at me as though I'm hatching alien spawn out of my cranium, that I remember what I would rather be doing. If I was either filthy rich or ridiculously brave, (either/or), I would move to Morocco, wake up at noon, eat soft, cracked-wheat tabbouleh spiced with saffron in an enamel tagine, and write about it. Then if I got bored, I'd get my Ph.D, work at a university, teach a little, (no forced assignments there!), then go on sabbatical to the Greek islands. And if I were a carnivore, I'd eat donor kebabs just like I did from the vendor on Lover's Lane in Izmir. Then I'd write about that, too. No one getting mad at me, except maybe my friends or my dad - hey it happens - and I would no longer be Ms. Villain, I'd simply be me.

I'd love advice on how to deal with the villain-role-complex. Just get over it? Don't think about it past the last toll of the bell? Stand my ground and keep popping out alien spawn? Well, I do stand my ground, I just feel awful. What a day.

Sparklers, mini-dresses, and balsamic vinager

2007-07-08T20:41:17-07:00

Sparklers that won't sparkle make Darcy sad.

On the 4th of July, I had the most unexpected dessert of my very chocolate-oriented life. I was at Eli's apartment, and his roommate, Scott, grilled peaches outside on their weber grill, (this fact is important in light of a story recalling my childhood, a weber grill, my first and last attempt at genuine rebellion, and the singed skin on the back of my hand - totally not related to this post), offered them to everyone as a dessert following an asparagus and chicken (both of which I'm sure were very good - but of course I didn't eat the chicken), dinner. Being a pescan who misses grilled meat, I'm up for anything new and adventurous in the world of non-meat grilling and bar- b-que, so I was excited to try grilled peaches. (Speaking of delicious grilled fruit - yum to pineapple! And tomatoes, if you license them as a fruit.)

After they finished cooking, Scott took his peaches, (grilled in slices in the skin), back into his cavernous kitchen and starts making lots of noise with gas stove-top burners and ramekins. The rest of us looked around, knitted our brows, and tried to ignore him from a lack of desire to help. Hooray for social loafing!

When he brought out his dessert, it looked like peaches, ice-cream, and chocolate syrup, but the scent of vinegar had suddenly permeated the air of the living room. Every one sniffed their little bowls, eyeing the food then eyeing Scott. "It's balsamic vinegar," he announced, answering all of our unspoken questions.

It was WEIRD. It was delicious. He had put the grilled peach halves over vanilla ice cream, and then boiled, (reduced? made a reduction of?) balsamic vinegar and poured it over the fruit and ice-cream. It smelled like vinegar, but the overall flavor had a mild sweetness. It felt like I was eating a sophisticated sundae, and it was so strange I felt the need to share the experience.

Then we walked half way across Little Rock (from Hillcrest to some park overlooking the river) to stand behind a tree and watch, I mean, listen to fireworks. And play with Matt's new iphone. Loser.

In other pressing matters... would the practicality of my having just bought a brand new car be negated if I moved to New York City in 1-3 years? Hm. Tonight's combination of a diner and jazz makes me eager to stop talking about it and move there. Wanderlust is difficult to live with.

So are all the cute dresses in the boutiques around here. Stop tempting the money out of my wallet! Oh, that's my hand...

They work!