Punk Planning

Real Media

cefrith@hotmail.com (Charles Frith) — Thu, 09 Jul 2009 23:00:00 +0000

As I've been running on vapours and not always had access to a computer, I've been blogging with paper and pen sometimes in much the same way as I started to write my first post over here, on a flight from New Delhi to Mumbai in 2006.

There's lots of mistakes and chunks missing if you can see at all, but just in case anyone wanted to see how appalling my handwriting is I thought I'd post them anyway. I'll try and get them typed up later this week and really there's a self referential (ooh so po mo) element to this because the longer of the two posts is about Understanding Media from a paper (analogue) to electronic spectrum; or if we include this post it's starting off electronically. You may note that I used the back of the police report for my stolen goods to write this (so some good came out of it) as well as the EMERGENCY number for the British Embassy that the police gave me and which didn't work. Meaning I had to sleep in the police waiting room for the night before borrowing precisely Two dollars to catch the ferry home the next day.

Communication Efficacy

cefrith@hotmail.com (Charles Frith) — Wed, 08 Jul 2009 23:00:00 +0000

Developing your own planning style

View more presentations from adliterate.

My planning mentor would have just distilled that title down to 'Efficacy', which is the what we planners do. But in any case Richard Huntington of Saatchi & Saatchi has put a presentation up that he did at the IPA called "Developing your own style" which is the school of planning that I learned at HHCL & Partners where Richard and I both worked, nearly a decade ago. Richard also includes some words from Guy Murphy the Global Planning Director for JWT and one of the reasons why I joined JWT and would fear them in any big pitch. Guy is easily the best multinational network planner I've had the luxury of spending time with when I worked for JWT in London before heading out to Beijing.

Often it's not what Guy says. It's what he doesn't say that commands most respect and is to my mind genius clever from the perspective of garruolous planners like myself. Less is more and all that.

Anyway enough of my waffle. Take a couple of minutes to see how powerful the right combination of words can be from some of the best in the business. And as someone who has lived and worked in more countries than most as a planner I think I can seperate the politically savvy but creatively mediocre beasts from the best in class cats.

And Love

cefrith@hotmail.com (Charles Frith) — Wed, 08 Jul 2009 08:30:00 +0000

My career is dotted with ads I ideas I couldn't coax through the system. There was the "Freedom" idea for Coca-cola or "We Miss You" for Post Tsunami Thailand and yet when I see work like this, I feel that I'm not the only one to roll this way. Levi's suddenly become relevant again.

I'm reminded that I recently read that Americans often insist on having their Jeans Made in the USA (complete with label), and that the luxury end of the market is paradoxically robust. This just makes sense as the United States is the home of Denim (Well you get what I mean). Great work from Levi's here. Via Influx Insights

UPDATE: The director for this movie is Cary Fukunaga and the words are by Walt Whitman who you may remember from back here. The more I see this film the more I love it.

Links for 2009-07-07 [del.icio.us]

Wed, 08 Jul 2009 00:00:00 PDT

Drugs?
Benzedrine to take off nicely Ha Ha Ha.

Good News

cefrith@hotmail.com (Charles Frith) — Tue, 07 Jul 2009 23:59:00 +0000

I've got a New passport *wipes brow* (And biometrics and computer chips and all the other lovely stuff that means I'm real and exist)

Actually the British Embassy were in the end very cooperative and seemed to know who I was, so maybe that journalist interview with the South China Morning Post did the trick but I pity the person who doesn't know how to be a squeaky wheel.

The bad news is I've not heard from Sam since last Thursday, as he's climbing a mountain in Tanzania, and I've had to assume the Punk Kiva funds will take too long to get here now that I'm now officially a registered human.

It means I can once again get on with my life.

I guess that Sam will take care of refunding all the wonderful and generous contributions you collectively made. I want to take this opportunity to thank both all of you and Sam for rallying around at a bleak point. You all proved that this isn't just about me, it's about us. It's about what we stand for and how we follow through with our deeds and actions.

I'm enormously grateful and forever indebted towards your spontaneous kindness, humanity and generosity. To paraphrase Ali G: 'Is it because I is a social object?'

;)

It's now important for me to get on with my plans for the rest of this year including a much needed trip to Beijing as soon as possible.

Once again Thank you. Hope is fortified by deeds and you just did it.

McDonalds & Family Guy

cefrith@hotmail.com (Charles Frith) — Tue, 07 Jul 2009 04:33:00 +0000

I shouldn't say this given my pseudo Neo-Marxist and anti Globalist/Corporate sentiment but I'm fascinated by McDonalds. No really; practically obsessed with them and particularly their breakfasts which (when I wrote this post and put it in the draft folder) I'm just waiting for some jeans to tumble dry (naughty given I'm in the tropics) and then I'm off for one of the finest precision breakfasts on the planet. The Sausage and Egg McMuffin with hash brown and coffee. I've also been squeezing in a couple of hot cakes with syrup after but you don't need to know that, because I really don't want to think about it.

So let's start as we mean to go on and shoot straight, because I think what McDonalds knows about themselves and what they don't know about themselves is the gap that I'd like to help them out on if a chance avails itself which is unlikely given I have a problem with Ronald McDonald. He's got to go; or at least maybe lose the clown suit, the make up, the big feet, the voice and that fucking red wig. I mean, we all know that a person better have a great personality if they have ginger pubes in much the same way that if born black in American it's a good idea to stay as far away from the law enforcement officers and their testosterone pumped, steroidal spiked aggression issues. That doesn't mean I don't like red hair. On the contrary; along with a Jewish Princess girlfriend I alway keep an eye open. You know, just in case.

I will come back to Family Guy a lot more, because when Faris wrote a while back that sport and religion have a wider remit than just playful competition and spiritual fulfilment I agreed with him and then some. I wrote back here that I think football performs an interesting social function when observed as conversation in pubs, and say, back-of-taxi discussions. I'll be using Family Guy for the same purpose in the future, as a tool, but first I should explain that even though I've only watched Season Five I'm convinced I'll be able to explain a lot of stuff using these types of clips that don't really exist legally on Youtube and yet are a poweful way for content producers to 'showcase' their stuff in much the same way as advertising works.

The one above serves it's purpose for me to dramatise police agression and also introduces some more people to Family Guy. If FOX were smarter they'd have every known humorous scenario of 5-10 second clips available on a searchable database for free so that people could use it to explain stuff. Same applies to the Simpsons or indeed any content such as the ghastly Friends or infinitely hipper Seinfeld. Both of which I've never watched much of but get the gist.

Back to McDonalds because I read this tweet earlier by Saul Kaplan who I often disagree with, but more in terms of scope than sentiment. The thing is that while it's easy to bash McDonalds for being the archetypical globalised brand with rapacious corporate in-sustainability, it is not so well know that McDonalds is one of the more progressive global brands when it comes to moving in the right direction. Sure they may have some farming methods which are mind boggling huge but they actively work on their responsibilities much harder than many so called mega corporate brands. We too have our responsibilities as I wrote back here and I've been using the same plastic knife and fork they give out as it's no trouble to reuse.

But what really excites me about McDonalds is that I think they are one of the few brands that almost ticks off the religious devotion that is, like my breakfast addiction, probably irrational and yet as I've learned in many different countries I think McDonalds also has the ubiquity of understanding globally that means it's here to stay and which is why I want to be on the inside and not on the outside.

Let me explain.

All over the planet I will have problems asking for different basic words in different languages. My Cantonese is rubbish so I'm struggling to ask for essential things like 'water', or 'food' or 'somewhere to sit down' or 'coffee', and yet it doesn't matter where I am on the planet, even if the country has no McDonalds. Everybody understands what I mean. It's global language and that is a powerful idea which we need to nurture and try to work on so that it retains some sense of dignity and that too is where I get excited about McDonalds.

I first got to thinking about this stuff the last time I was in Hong Kong because I have a deep respect for a global franchise that hires a person with learning difficulties. I've blogged about this elsewhere but can't find it in either posts or comments so I need to repeat that when enjoying (and I do enjoy them) a Sausage and Egg McMuffin with Hash Brown and Coffee I think it's great that while I'm not quite so comfortable having my table wiped by someone with learning difficulties, who reminds me of the sadness in the world, I'm moved and humbled by brands that employ people with challenges in life, who might otherwise remain anonymous and day by day lose their ability to integrate with the world. So thanks for that McDonalds because I respect you and your more open minded employment policy. But there's also a lot more to you.

I was reminded only a couple of weekends ago on a Ferry ride away in Aberdeen, Hong Kong because I got talking to more local Cantonese than any other time in my life. The Chinese are often held to be inscrutable but in my experience public life interaction is culturally different and like any other culture there's always going to be a latent resentment of other dominant cultures. But the subject is massive so don't sound-bite me on that or even thin slice me because I've got a massive post brewing on handwritten paper to try and flesh that topic out and it's both enormously sensitive and one of the trickiest to tip toe around without sounding like a pampered white boy - which I am. It does need typing up first though.

My first conversation with a retired but smartly dressed Chinese guy nearly made me fall off my stool. He paid no attention to the black nail varnish I've occasionally been wearing this year or even my silly hat and scarves affectation I've moved on to. But for Asians they mean a lot, because the nail that sticks out gets hammered in and yet this chap proceeded to engage in broken English conversation. After introducing myself and explaining a little of what I do, he did something that is anathema for many people let alone an elderly Asian gent having a conversation with Gweilo as we're referred to in this part of the world (it means ghost and is semiotically up there with Farang in Thailand though like Thailand, it's ubiquity has softened it's tonality).

He explained to me that his son was lazy. That his son's wife was fat and that they both were not working full time although his son had some cancer that prevented him from working some times. He described to me how fat the wife was and how they both turned up at his house religiously each evening for a cooked meal that his own wife had prepared because they were too lazy to do so themselves. He didn't explain it with malice. It was pure matter of fact and then he went on to describe that he was disappointed in his son who had received an education in England and from his not unreasonable Engineers salary had received a reasonable number of opportunities in life. I couldn't help but correlate that I was his own sons age and that we had talked about how I could be so mobile. It was a lovely converation while we drank our coffee together waiting for his wife to return from a bit of shopping in an area that I can only reference as being the Bull Ring of Hong Kong in terms of it's urban tonality and yet oddly enough I noticed it was completely void of teenagers. Babies and Pensioners yes. But no teens.

I guess it was me going back for some more of those hot cakes with that maple syrup they do which t led to my next encounter. Sitting next to me was a young and attractively dressed woman with two gorgeous toddlers clambering all over the seats and demanding attention in that way only really cute kid can pull off without appearing tiresome and boy these two kids were cute. We got talking and the mother used the opportunity to remind the lovely little urchins that they were both doing English at school and so could say hello and give me their names. I spoke briefly to the mother who I admired because it was evident she was working in some capacity during the week, taking care of her children and both managed to look presentable as well as having delightfully cute kids. The apple hadn't fallen far from the tree in this instance.

I've no idea why I knew she worked in the week but it's a skill I've picked up over the years reading peoples clothes to know this sort of thing. Lots of little indicators like the watch, shoes, makeup and accessories. Accessories tell us a lot if we look hard enough.

Anyway, mission accomplished I dispensed with the ferry ride back and caught a bus into Hong Kong central as I'm determined to cover as much ground as possible while I'm here and get to know the whole place. The bit that kept me ticking over was the good luck to have proper interaction with locals. There's little chance that I could have done this with both a young mother and an elderly gent in places like Starbucks or Pret a manger and it's that social interaction permission that I think is a powerful part of the future of McDonalds because they've nailed all that outstanding value breakfasts which cut right through demographics and geography. I think it's time to start figuring out both more of the role they play in the social fabric of all the communities that they fulfill a role in. Which in this age is really a highly fractured and increasingly atomised nuclear family structure. The ability to faciliate more meaning in the world means, I believe, that they need more meaning management. Something I'm quite keen to do for them.

It's the Amygdala Stupid

cefrith@hotmail.com (Charles Frith) — Sun, 05 Jul 2009 23:30:00 +0000

This Evian ad is doing the rounds on the blogs and I thought it was a good time to point out the neurological influences that help advertising.

So while I think it's lovely. Isn't it just pure neuro marketing? Or is it coincidental that this was one of the biggest spreadable media content successes of the internet? Here's an updated version.

I was having a brilliant lunch with Rob last week and at some point I realised that just shooting the breeze with him is solid gold planning lessons that in an ordinary world he invoices interesting brands for. So if ever there is a compelling reasons to get blogging and get involved in the conversation instead of just reading or lurking on blogs, here it is I guess, but of course it's OK if you just like to observe.

Anyway I got talking about my experience on the huge success of Qoo across Asia some years back because I met the Japanese creatives at Hakuhodo in Tokyo who came up with the creative concept. I learned that, much like the dancing babies above, it's largely a neurological attraction; particularly for children. The cartoon character was designed 'on-the-fly' in focus groups using traits such as a big head, baby eyes and small body to appeal to children with the most appealing character coming clearly through as a clear 'winner' during research. Which is why the product used to fly off the shelves wherever it touched down in Asia. However, some of the character guidelines such as pathos were less successful in Europe. Here's the character below in case you've not seen it.

Evian ad via Bhatnaturally

Neurological Processing

cefrith@hotmail.com (Charles Frith) — Sun, 05 Jul 2009 07:27:00 +0000

I find it deeply human to know that my consciousness is somewhat analagous to the broadband internet connection I'm using to write this (and download (illegally of course) The Wire and Family Guy with a P2P bit torrent utility). What is amazing is that to concentrate, I'm also ignoring the roughly-equivalent data-bandwidth of the whole 70 story apartment building block overlooking Victoria Harbour in Tung Chung (is that right?) and Chek Lap Kok airport.

Basically our brains are a vast filtering system designed to keep us focused and with enough back office processing to have an imagination too. This very short video is brilliant and comes via the formidable Katie Chatfield who along with Gavin were top of my Australia visit-list (and of course Angus) before all this Dacoity/Detective Inspector Clouseau stuff that I'm hoping will make some progress very shortly.

Check out Sputnik Observatory for more hardcore info-porn over here.

The Disney Line

cefrith@hotmail.com (Charles Frith) — Sat, 04 Jul 2009 01:08:00 +0000

Just in case. Here's my email

Malcolm X

cefrith@hotmail.com (Charles Frith) — Fri, 03 Jul 2009 23:45:00 +0000

Just been browsing Youtube this morning and lucked out big time. It's not that it doesn't have great content but when I'm in random mode, I often think Youtube doesn't know what I've never told it I'd like to see (or that the suggestions aren't always compelling).

So after switching off the awful and wasted opportunity of Martin Bashir and Michael Jackson (an illegally downloaded file that I'm grateful not to pay a penny for) though it's now 6 years later before I could finally watch it, I guess I got to thinking about black American artists, which led just now, to my first viewing of that Great American writer (the revolution will not be televised) Gill Scott Heron, and then on to Malcolm X. And then it occured to me during his crisp torrent of erudite and lucid intellect in the interview that, I've never stopped thinking about him and even a week or so ago was still referring to Malcolm X indirectly from his Nutmeg and Lindy Hopping days in this post.

Over 20 years after reading his autobiography and I'm still dropping his life into mine and I find it astonishing I can see him now for the first time on Youtube and connect in that way which suggests I always deeply admired Malcolm X. I just didn't know how much I deeply admired him.

Word.

Features & Benefits

cefrith@hotmail.com (Charles Frith) — Fri, 03 Jul 2009 00:32:00 +0000

One of the features of having a suitcase of the most important things I possess stolen by a taxi driver who has yet to receive a knock on the door because it takes ten days or more to follow up a licence plate number in Hong Kong is that I've gone through an enforced digital separation.

Apart from stints prefaced by annoying over-the-shoulder peering, on a friends computer, I'm pretty much obliged to use internet cafes and the like. I haven't done this regularly for a number of years as there was a time when traveling around Asia that I'd be observing the kids from a lot of countries in a rowdy, usually post-school gamer, web cam or plain old digitally socialised media which in Asia was adopted very quickly through Friendster and which you can still find me on over here. It was 2002 I think when one of the senior creatives at BBDO Dusseldorf, where I was working invited me to join in the 'virtual snowball fight' I think he called it. Not a bad description and one that holds up to this day.

The benefit of this enforced seperation is that I've started to immerse myself back into the world of books and printed media. I've even got a few handwritten posts that need typing up. Not only am I reading books but another feature of my new analogue life is that I'm talking to and meeting lots more people. It's obvious really but instead of gulping down mobile RSS in the back of a taxi or blogging at the restaurant table on an N95 I've started engaging in conversations a lot more; which is fun because I'm meeting people I'd otherwise have missed. One has asked me to help sell her Chinese Antiques of which I know nothing; but as we are going to be living on the same Island in the future I figure it would be wise to be helpful as for sure there will be another day when I will need help. It's part of the human condition and also she's a very interesting person. I've been meeting a lot more interesting people since going analogue (ooh check me).

So without further waffling on I'd like to ask if any of you know what these metal and spherically shaped containers are? Or failing that do you know anyone who does? I've used a standard business card in the photos to give scale. The enamel work on them is evidently superior and has been unquestionably done by a craftsman, although the patina conceals a lot of the beauty and which I guess could be polished. The shots I've taken here are on phone I'm borrowing and not as good as the Nokia N95 ones I've enjoyed taking in the last two years but I think you get the picture.

So. Does anybody know what these are? Even better does anyone know how I can get these assesed? We need an Antiques Road Show I guess in Hong Kong, but in the mean time I'm asking you or if you could send this post to people who do know using the email icon below. That would be just terrific. Thank you.

Links for 2009-07-01 [del.icio.us]

Thu, 02 Jul 2009 00:00:00 PDT

Burial

cefrith@hotmail.com (Charles Frith) — Wed, 01 Jul 2009 08:46:00 +0000

Pockets23

Being a bit thick and unaware as well as living in countries where the main stream media language isn't in English, I've missed the whole Burial thing. It's a bit dark for my taste but as it was brought to my attention I've given it some thought and concluded that like the burials going on here, there, here and here plus there, here, there and h ere in the last seven days. The subject matter is very dark possibly suggesting that two wrongs don't make a right and only benefits from dialogue and free and transparent discussion.

So thanks for that.

I guessed I missed Burial winning the Mercury Prize last year as I was traveling around Beijing for the Olympics after my trip to Mexico, San Francisco and Los Angeles.

I"m hoping for some funds to arrive tomorrow as today is a bank holiday and I'll let you know how that goes as I'm still without a passport and money.

Links for 2009-06-28 [del.icio.us]

Mon, 29 Jun 2009 00:00:00 PDT

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/northamerica/usa/5664258/President-Barack-Obama-clears-major-global-warming-hurdle.html
Look how many Republicans voted for this.

I was born, in a crossfire Hurricane

cefrith@hotmail.com (Charles Frith) — Sun, 28 Jun 2009 08:56:00 +0000

I have actually seen this movie, though right now it crosses over nicely from something I discovered THIS MORNING. It was my 40th birthday YESTERDAY. Which Means I've inadvertantly and serendipitously skipped the whole event. This pleases me no end as firstly, every day is my birthday (close friends will testify) and also I'm still waiting for 21st century banking to hire faster pidgeons because even though speculators can crush whole economies in minutes like George Soros did (and then went on to sancitimoniously lecture the oil speculators - greed anyone?), when it comes to normal people like you and I; we have to wait. Which is why I left this comment over at Neils because there has to be a reason why the banks don't want us to have micropayments. It's not rocket science or brain surgery.

In any case it was not only my birthday but also the 40th anniversary of the Stonewall riots because we both belong to 27 June 1969. Anyway in my opinion it was the cops that night who were rioting again, by busting into the Stonewall Inn and using their violence to break up people who are traditionally portrayed as pretty flimsy at physical aggression - pansies I've heard them called.

It was however in the time when same-sex hand-holding was illegal but you know how those ultra homophobic heterosexuals are......They're invariably homosexuals in denial which is just logical if you think it through and if it's too uncomfortable for you, then here's the research for it.

So now that I've given the Hong Kong police force a verbal ticking off for gay policework as in; "You go first", "No you go first", "No you go first, I need to tuck my uniform shirt in". I'll leave you with a picture of the night in question, because New York is on the map and I'm going to take my time rather than go American Express. Or do we tolerate the deniers?

Her Majesty's British Consulate General Hong Kong

cefrith@hotmail.com (Charles Frith) — Fri, 26 Jun 2009 03:29:00 +0000

Thank You, Thank You, Thank You

cefrith@hotmail.com (Charles Frith) — Thu, 25 Jun 2009 09:54:00 +0000

I'm still on the back foot till the funds arrive, and while I was really having a rant at the authorities you took the bull by the horns and did what I needed. You've been brilliant, and I'm humbled by your kindness and generosity.

Now what are all these contextual ads for flights to Tuscany doing in my mail?

This is just a small sample of your Twitterpower and forgive me if I've neglected to respond properly yet in the comments or in my mail as I've tried to be diligent but at one point I was swamped by Disqus. Sam who has been brilliant, at doing, not talking is taking care of money administration over here and I will blog every penny I spend so you can see how it's working to get me out of this situation. I may be broke for a wee while but through your collective kindness, I believe I'm a rich man that no bean counting can every quantify. Thanks so much again and again.

Links for 2009-06-24 [del.icio.us]

Thu, 25 Jun 2009 00:00:00 PDT

US cities may have to be bulldozed in order to survive - Telegraph
That growth word

Hong Kong CID

cefrith@hotmail.com (Charles Frith) — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 11:21:00 +0000

I'm hoping you might learn that any expectations of high standards from dealing with the Hong Kong Constabulary or the sneaker wearing, high fiving Plain clothes Criminal Investigations Department (apart from two individuals who were cool) will only disappoint you if my experiences are typical.

Last Friday night I caught a taxi with all the important stuff in a suitcase. Usually things like mobile phones, wallets, computers, passports and so forth are separate but in this instance they were packed in various suitcase pockets for reasons such as picking up my laundry on the way. Unfortunately for me the Taxi driver I caught would not listen to my instructions such as "stay here please" and on each successive occasion ignored me until I concluded he was being uncooperative.

I wanted Hong Kong police to deal with him and not me. I said to myself if the police feel I'm being unreasonable I'll pay the fare and accept their judgement. An hour lost is a small price to pay for not getting into an altercation over a fare with a cabbie. (I have to say all of them on Hong Kong apart from the bad person I got have been brilliant and helpful)

Once I finally conveyed to the driver there was no hotel we were going to and I wasn't putting up with feigned stupidity (I was visiting a friend) he took me to the Police Station and I leaped out, pleading with the desk officer to come out and talk to the taxi driver. The desk officer wanted to ask me questions that were beyond irrelevancy and so the taxi driver drove off without payment, and with my suitcase. Fortunately I noted the last four digits of the number plate.

The Police said to me "Don't worry, we will try to return your belongings". While being interviewed by CID I realised that only one officer present grasped I was a victim and that it wasn't a case of an absent minded taxi driving off.

I hadn't paid my fare. Sheer procrastination on the Police's part had led to an even worse scenario.

I'm a resilient character and loss of property doesn't grieve me as much as it does others. Read this to see why. I could howl about the Chanel shades, my Macbook Air the large amount of cash, and the like, but the truth is, some of you have left comments here that have delighted me more than any atoms ever could. Even the emails I'm getting now from the few who know, have been brilliant, including one pal I've only met once in Beijing, who comes from Hong Kong and offered to lend me money, while we laughed about how it was karma for writing my luxury posts including all the luxury shopping which is now stolen. We laugh at the trivial. We value each other. Long may you prosper.

I'm lucky that I still have enough money to do with my life as I wish, but without my wallet and cards; I had 18 HK Dollars in my pocket (1.6 Euros) and the EMERGENCY number for the British Embassy they gave me was a recorded message giving the office hours.

To convey the Kafkaesque nature of the Peter Sellers team let me give you a taster of the conversation I had around 11 PM in the evening while I weighed up my options.

Me: "The Consulate number isn't working. What time is the last ferry please" (thinking I might walk to Central about 40 minutes away and beg for two dollars to make it across the water.

Desk Sergeant (Calls a number) "There's no one answering, have you tried the Consulate?"

So I slept in the waiting room on those ridged seats in viciously cold air conditioning and shorts while drunken and needlessly loud voices pressed charges or had charges pressed against them through the night in what I can only describe as a scene reminiscent of those god awful passages from the Clergy Man's daughter by George Orwell. I shuddered reading it and I shuddered as I awoke each time in the night.

Anyway a week later and basically the British Consulate don't want to know. I'm living off the good will of people I don't really know, while a good friend recuperates from a back operation and I've been calling CID to find out if they've even apprehended the taxi driver of the number plate I gave. I've no money, no Passport, no FAGS, few clothes, no mobile and no computer.

I'm an ILLEGAL alien, with no way of getting my money, and the only people who want to help are my social media gang, most of whom I've not even met.

It's unbelievable, and Hong Kong CID have just put the phone down on me when I asked for the second time today on progress, and how to give them a few more clues like the very memorable T Shirts I have, one of which I wore in San Francisco here and which might be lying around somewhere in the culprits apartment. I don't think they've even followed up what happened last week and now I want to make an official complaint about the police. Probably I'm wasting my time there too.

Hong Kong CID. Is the C for clueless? You suck and you know it. You just don't care. You should have been knocking on the culprits door within 24 hours because by now if he's got any sense he would have SOLD everything I own not on the grounds of GREED but on the grounds of LOGIC.

I hold the police responsible for dawdling at the front desk, dawdling on the investigation and now dawdling and dissembling with EVERY phone call I've made. They just don't care if they've done anything at all. So all I can say to you folks is one thing.

I really like Hong Kong but .......... I've never meet a more feeble, lethargic and unresponsive Cop outfit towards a guest (and I think high spending visitor) as the one I have encountered, and that it's better to take the law into your own hands than report it.

If I'd have done that; I wouldn't be writing this post now and thinking about how I'm going to get a passport and some cash to get back on with my life which means India is definitely off the cards (so sorry about that folks -I'm really sorry)

I'd appreciate any of my readers thoughts on this because right now I'm jumping through hoops with a British Consulate that wont even issue me with a Passport that I need in order to regain my life via banking and so forth, and a Hong Kong CID that wont answer my questions about progress nearly a week later.

Apparently the Consulate says I'm good for 50 quid which wont even cover the cost of a passport or even doing a photo run to apply for one. I'm afraid my winning smile isn't working very much at the moment. But you know what. I still said a little prayer to God and thanked him for all the good stuff I've been given in life because there's been loads and loads of it. Look at that Green revolution kicking off on Twitter logos.

Peace.

Links for 2009-06-23 [del.icio.us]

Wed, 24 Jun 2009 00:00:00 PDT

Neda Agha-Soltan
Is it me or is she looking at us through the camera as she dies for democracy in Iran?
Have videogames and reality TV given us 'narrative exhaustion'?
That's 35,000 hours of plot. Movies, television shows, cartoons, streaming video, YouTube clips. Storylines long and short: teen comedies, soap operas, love stories, crime shows, historical dramas, special-effects extravaganzas, horror, porn, highbrow, lowbrow, hour after hour, day after day, year after year. That's a lot of narrative. It's exhausting.
News review interview: Malcolm Gladwell review | Non-fiction book ...
Like I said. Over rated. Even though I finished his latest book last night and I'll be writing about him later.

Cigarette Packaging

cefrith@hotmail.com (Charles Frith) — Wed, 24 Jun 2009 03:20:00 +0000

Impending legislation may mean that cigarette packaging for Marlboro could end up looking like this. I guess people like Emigre will have a field day with the font as key design feature. Via Influx Insights and Ed's Photo Stream.

However as a lapsed non smoker (I should work in PR) I always thought the Thai health warnings are the most punchy I've seen, and yet that never worked for me. It's possible that as a word man I might find Pentagram more effective. I guess I'm not the market segment being spoken to as one would hope that it's the younger ones who are put off ever trying.

This is one of the milder ones although you can see more over here. Frankly the following effort by Pentagram is just cool and precisely the reason why so many take up smoking in the first place.

Links for 2009-06-22 [del.icio.us]

Tue, 23 Jun 2009 00:00:00 PDT

Video: Arrested for asking a policeman for his badge number ...
Police doing their thing
Language post
Chomsky and Wittgenstein would enjoy this
Clueless Chimp - Welcome to Clueless Chimp
Not bad Chimp Curated - Chill and Electronica

My Little Pony - Double-Cat-Claws Puffy-Cheeked Pose

cefrith@hotmail.com (Charles Frith) — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 04:23:00 +0000

I've got some serious posts coming up on the subject of social media, paper versus digital media, attention spans and bloody Malcolm Gladwell (over bloody rated frankly, but lovely timbre of voice) so I thought I'd get this amuse gul out of the way as Mary kindly sent me this pic which I'm happy to confirm is empirical evidence that the Muji Green Scarves work big time. Note his and hers matching O.D.M. watches which are pretty much all I have left after a disastrous friday night that is about to get some exposure if the British Consulate and Hong Kong CID don't pull their fingers out.

Update: As if from nowhere that Muji Embed I was playing around with has appeared below. Feel free to do as you please because there was no suggestion it was working in the preview.

Opinionated Sod

cefrith@hotmail.com (Charles Frith) — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 02:12:00 +0000

I went to a reasonable amount of effort to ensure that Rob was made the number one Opinionated Sod in the world through the Google Juice Ranking System. So imagine my confusion when, as I always do, I Googled it to get on his blog and found that I had taken his place (see below). I don't know why but I've done some "neutral tests" and it's just my personal algorithm. Until he denies it I'm assuming it's his "relationship" with the Google boys in Mountain View that is responsible for all this.

Portable Social Graphs

cefrith@hotmail.com (Charles Frith) — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 01:27:00 +0000

I was talking about these in Beijing around the time I wrote this. A few of you will no doubt remember from Skype conversations.

Portable Social Graphs - Imagining their Potential

View more OpenOffice presentations from shivsingh.

Links for 2009-06-21 [del.icio.us]

Mon, 22 Jun 2009 00:00:00 PDT

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/sacha-baron-cohen/5579114/Austrians-fail-to-see-funny-side-of-Bruno-and-Sacha-Baron-Cohen.html
My favourite Cohen character to date.

Yo Momma Gotta A Wanta?

cefrith@hotmail.com (Charles Frith) — Sun, 21 Jun 2009 16:04:00 +0000

Maslow's hierarchy of needs isn't it?

I remember a Dutch (and emotionally liberated) friend who traveled the world in business class as a consultant, and who shared with me the female business traveler top-tip of pocket rocket. Perhaps I've been a little slow getting to grips with toy culture but this post has prompted the Polish girl I'm staying with and her just arrived Czech friend on holiday to casually meander into the room and there's a buzzing sound being emitted with what I assume is gossip about features and benefits. (They said I could mention it in the blog post when I asked if it was what I think it was).

Welcome to my life.

I'm also delighted by the clever media buying underneath the ad. Props to HK magazine for running a thoroughly modern ad and of course Wanta for the naked communications strategy.

Brilliant. Go Fuck Yourself.

The Future's Bright

cefrith@hotmail.com (Charles Frith) — Fri, 19 Jun 2009 08:41:00 +0000

I'm quite pleased with this shot because getting the scrolling message on it correct involved two MTR underground rides to Tsim Tsa Tsui in Kowloon, a bit of shouting because the machine to programme the watch wasn't there, some more shouting because the watch model didn't programme like they advertised, some TLC to the shop assistant who needed to know I was putting on the rage a bit so that they did something like upgrade the watch to the one that does program at no cost and then the Star Ferry across the harbour to central. It's such a beautiful thing to do and I can't tell you how magic it is to do a little bit of history as a commute/trip. I'm so lucky.

Anyway, she still looked nervous after my cheesy grin pulling, so I'll go back and lay some more love on her next time I change the message. It's an O.D.M watch and the aficionados will recognise that the orange strap doesn't come in black face but that's what needed to be sorted out as part of the scrolling message thing. It's not as stupidly expensive as the IWC which I'm waaay more open to given the fab service at the Schaffenhausen boutique but anyway it's still a pure fashion accessory because I don't need it really. My mobile phone as does yours, tells the time if we're honest.

This lovely young lady was a good sport because it's the orange watch that get's the puff cheeked, double cat claws acion. I hope I hear from you because your T Shirt Idea is something I've been kicking around for a while in my head. Wanna do a small fashion thing together?

Aunty Viv would have been proud of what I told the staff who tried to prevent me taking this photograph. I think they should read her biography here, definitely (no exceptions) watch this and then we can talk about that belt you should give me the most awesome discount on OK? I only want the accessories because let's face it. To really get away with Vivienne Westwood it's about affording it. Clothing for heroes? (Check) Budget? (Not yet)

Truly a privilege to live in the same century. (Absolutely no chance of working with them though given that superstar is holding their hands. Anybody know any Triads? (OK that's a pretty funny Hong Kong advertising gag but nobody EVER comments on my puns so I gotta highlight them now)

Must dash because the owner of the luggage store I mentioned here is opening his shop tonight and I'm going to be very rude and try and get a sweet deal on the Camel Leather number that is going to push me into living in a bus shelter as the best looking vagabond on the planet. The Bothos website is here if you want to know what style of leather bag turns me on but the drop down always in beta thing fucking cracks me up because it's just spot on and I think they don't know how 2.0 it is although I will ask.

Asian Poses (cont)

cefrith@hotmail.com (Charles Frith) — Wed, 17 Jun 2009 14:42:00 +0000

I managed to hook up with the worlds most opinionated sod for lunch today and as he managed to snap me looking tres pimp outside The Oriental in Bangkok last time I thought I'd take a picture for posterity too.

Before I knew it he was doing that puffy cheeked V signed shit that is all the craze with school girls across Asia, and that he claimed he picked up from doing some bollocks he calls distributed digital ethno but which sounds suspiciously like surfing the net to see what J Girls put up on their bedroom shelves.

I thought it was all a bit 'last week' and that everybody knew it was puffy cheeks PLUS double cat claws this week, but it's hard to keep up with these things after 15, so I cut Rob some slack and just had a terrific lunchtime rambling chat, with one of the best in the biz.

Read his blog regularly because it's one of a kind and has a lot of common sense in it which we all know isn't that common, and it's also a piss taking, best one liners in the comments section, provider-of-laughs you'll find on the net, if you keep a regular eye on it.

You'll learn something too.

Challenging Conventions

cefrith@hotmail.com (Charles Frith) — Wed, 17 Jun 2009 14:28:00 +0000

The Telegraph posted this trailer for Coco Chanel and I thought maybe a few of you would know if it's your sort of thing if my review was rubbish but the embed conveyed the style a bit better than I was able to explain.

Luxury

cefrith@hotmail.com (Charles Frith) — Wed, 17 Jun 2009 14:27:00 +0000

I've been totally four nelsoned on the shopping here in Hong Kong. Most of 'yall know that really I'm a wannabe flaky hippy. I fly as little as I can, switch off lights and appliances religiously, use a fan instead of air conditioning even if it's a little bit uncomfortable, want to grow my own vegetables and have my own chicken coup I'm struck that I could probably fish for my tea while I'm on Fantasy Island.

Anyway that doesn't mean I'm anti wealth creation at all. We need to create value or utility in our lives (preferably both) and that is extended through the media of money and it's systems operations of banking with cash or the more sophisticated credit constructs should you want to borrow it. This isn't the time or place to go into money as media which is a really interesting construct when the penny drops which it will do if China get their mojo in place, and the United States blinks over the whole optimism or die philosophy which in itself is a lot more powerful than I ever thought and up there with a sort of Nietzsche Will to Power sublimation of virtue.

However, I love beauty. I frequently duck into designer shops and invariably check out the female ranges because I always walk out with an elevated sense of the human spirit when I see how beautiful some stuff is ( In the last week it's been Miu Miu Greek Mosaics, The Prada White Cotton smock tops, The Dior Boots, The Prada low key distressed leather bags (impeccable inconspicuous consumption timing), The latest Kenzo range (quite a departure) and blah blah blah you get the drift.

It also applies to the baubles of male accessories such as glasses, bags and watches as I'm not really into men's designers per se. It contravenes my code for self indulgence which is entirely paradoxical with my propensity to buy the accessories I've just mentioned but hey; each to his own and anyway that American Starred D&G jacket is whistling each time I pass there IFC outlet.

I thought I'd hauled in all that conspicuous consumption because apart from some Chanel Shades I bought in Beijing last year and two dirt cheap kettles I burnt through neglect, I've hardly bought anything that I thought was wasteful. Anyway I've been having a complete fucking nightmare with PCCW who are just the ultimate time wasting idiots in the telecommunication business this side of Kowloon.

They fail to recognise the lose lose logic output of their business because they waste both their time and mine. I ducked into Sunglasses Hut to convey that to them after twenty minutes of being put on hold five or more times that they were trying my patience and I was immediately aware while entering the quieter public space of the shop that I was using their space to conduct my business, but being a cheeky sod, I still asked for a pen to make a note.

When I was finished they cunningly asked me if I'd like to look at some sunglasses. Well the answer was no, because I have the glasses I love very much, I lose stuff all the time and it's expensive buying expensive shades or rather doubly so for me. However acutely aware that I was both using their premises ostensibly to sort out a 20 HK dollar problem (a few pounds) and that they had the Ferragamo shades I'd long been in love with since Beijing (that were on sale for half price at over a thousand HK dollars), I began to repeat over and over to myself that I didn't need them, couldn't afford them, would lose them or spill superglue on them in the cinema like the Chanel shades (don't ask).

But the sheer patience of the staff in dealing with me, their manners, their small kindnesses and gentle chiding that the Ferragamo looked great of me (sweet mouths you) and before I knew it I was pulling out my card and getting the shades which are super super thin and lightweight, and so hardly no carbon footprint at all, but in any case I made it clear to the staff that they had proatively sold me the product and that I had enjoyed the experience.

That's how I am. I try to save 20 bucks with my useless PCCW phone operator and end up spending well over 50 times that amount because I love good manners, good design and kindness.

The point came home to me again the next day because I met up with Noah, and while browsing a few shops ambled past the new IWC flagship store that had just opened. They make those Schaffenhausen watches which are v. popular in Asia, and being as Noah is a watch watcher's son (ha ha) we both went in.

Well the first thing I noticed was a fragrance that I liked, and the lady greeting us said it wasn't for sale as it was the boutique fragrance and piped around what looked like a mid 19th century modestly wood panelled study with some very expensive watches; the most expensive more than a million.

Anyway the service was impeccable and really friendly. I liked the way they didn't look down on us, dressed in our hard to determine, how wedged-up we were, kind of way. And that's the critical point about luxury sales. I've spent enough time in luxury shops to know when the sales staff are being arseholes making sniffy comments, adjusting everything I touch or even just looking at their own watches which is a universal language for your wasting my time. Which isn't true if they know me but waaay to many luxury brands just don't get it that not all lovers of beauty dress like ostentatious pricks all the time.

We like nice things and frankly I like second hand or used things too. Style is a matter of taste, not money but to be dripping in branded goods just shows a lack of imagination and there should always be something that isn't OBVIOUS.

So moving on I have to admit that I don't really like the IWC Schaffenhausen watches. They are too big and just not my cup of tea. I wasn't adding potential candidates to my consideration set which is more of a fantasy league than anything. But anyway, Noah spotted that among the cool merchandise and social objects in the newly opened, and worldwide flagship store that they had a flight simulator cockpit for a spitfire, complete with video screen to play on. I'm way to British to ask to use these things but one thing I like about Americans is the relaxed way of inquiring about using stuff that seems to more often in the affirmative than if I had tried. So he got into the cockpit and proceeded to crash the plane repeatedly; thus losing us the second world war and obviously the liberation of Europe :P

While Noah repeatedly nose dived the flight simulator I was offered a glass of champagne which frankly I'm always up for but felt it would be misleading to drink. Once again the highly professional and admirably persistent sales assistant (Kam Fok) ignored my reservations, and delivered two glasses of Poo while I was given the only watch in the place that I would even vaguely consider. Still, it felt dam good on my slender wrists.

My stupid first thought was that it could be used in a backward clenched fist wrist to face defense manoeuvrings on some fictional assailant, which might sound aggressive and that I watch to many Chuck Norris movies, but I was informed that it was the official watch for the US Air Force a year or two ago, and is built to withstand the usual thermonuclear warfare as well as convert into a Swiss knife and portable Smeg Kitchen at the press of a button.

But the line in the sand for me was it was called Top Gun and without even expressing my disdain for Hollywood approved merchandise it was conveyed to me by Mis Fok, that Top Gun was all about the military terminology, and is approved by the USA, but also nothing to do with the movie which is obvious when we think about because the movie is about real life and not the other way round. Sheesh anyone would think I've only been here three months instead of close to 15 years of pretty deep Asian immersion I've touched upon over here , here and here.

So the magic of this process is that even though I'm not a Schaffenhausen IWC fan. If I ever go down the route of a chunky luxury watch I'm half inclined to go down to the boutique and try that sucker on one more time because it felt so good. That's how sales are made and the old mistaken trope that snobby service is how discerning people like to separate there affluent wheat from the fiscally diminished chaff is just retarded. The luxury stores that know how to swing a sale from the likes of me and quite a few others I know is to be human, treat us like humans and you know. Try and enjoy your job which means making it a challenge to find a way to make a good impression. Social media might give us a second chance to make a first impression but real life is still about old fashioned intelligence, courtesy, humour, effort and swinging the impossible sale. It can be done.

Anway, this post has reiterated the indulgence I have been shamefully shopping in, and I've been promising it to Musa for a few days so rather than go into the social media opportunities for luxury brands I'll wrap up on my last Hong Kong luxury retail experience that prompted me to start writing.

After yet another wonderful fly up near The Old Bailey our gang of four descended the hill towards H&M to get a hat for Sherri. Chris paused at the lights and noticed that a new luxury baggage shop had opened. Let me dig out the card.

Bothos Flagship Store. OK, so I tailed Chris in and noticed one bag that really was a lovely beast of tan and white leather breezy travelling beauty and functionality. I know what I like and it was working. I immediately assesed its price around 5-10 K Hong Kong Dollars and parked the notion of buying it. However I was stunned yet again that Fillipo Perricone and his partner made more than an effort to explain the craftsmanship of the bag which I learned was made from Camel leather and makes for an interesting provenance story I thought.

But you know it wasn't the willingness to explain the bag in a newly opened store. I'd expect that but I felt there was genuine interest from the owners towards someone who was genuinely interested in that bag. Polite conversation and a sort of matched agenda of people who know about making great luxury leather products and someone who actually has a bit of a bag fetish though usually for products out of his budget.

Then for the second time in my life and also in two days Phillipe offered me a glass of wine which I'd have definitely gone for but noticed that the original reason for popping into the shop was now standing around waiting politely for me to finish chatting (thanks guys. I appreciated it because I was off on luxury marketing for the third millennium at that point and most touched by some simple words by Phillipe that he didn't want to sell me anything but wanted to make friends. The wine was a gesture in that direction and though I was short on time, I felt the authenticity of the notion of making a sale from relationships that are allowed to evolve in their own sweet time.

I'll be popping back to that shop to get to know them a little better because like the staff at Sunglasses Hut and Schaffenhausen, Phillipe knows how to turn a glimmer of a prospect into an actively involved consideration set luxury brand future customer.

Maybe its just Hong Kong but these guys know how to keep a smile on my face while relieving me of money that can never match the enjoyment that comes from beautiful things...well not while I can afford to clear the essentials anyway.

So anyway, I'm coming out of retirement folks. I'm back and I'm hungry to work. Or I have to find a way of staying on fantasy Island and well away from an endless supply of beautiful goods with pockets of service culture that may cultivate more than just the transactional value of a sale because I always like to make friends with whoever I come into contact with.

If they can put up the idiosyncrasies.

Research

cefrith@hotmail.com (Charles Frith) — Wed, 17 Jun 2009 01:00:00 +0000

I got talking to a creative friend of mine who has just finished a big shoot in China, and we veered onto the subject of dross-quality Chinese advertising in mainland PRC. But don't let me shape your opinion go to Youtube or Youku and see if you can dig out something that has anything to say.

It's pretty much all pants, which for a nation of 1.3 billion people and a LOT of ads says something doesn't it? I talked about it bluntly over here, but there's a few more reasons why "safety first" is king of the mill. You might also find something in my Asian research posts over here, here and here.

In any case we got talking about a particular BBDO style of blockbuster commercial that uses a method I don't want to specifically mention here but which was researched by the client in China and amazingly the answer was that it wasn't as effective as real ideas.

Well of course we know that but it's amazingly hard to prove this because one would need a parallel universe and an A/B split to see which one is most effective to prove beyond doubt which is more effective but in any case I thought that it would be wise to point out that we can make research prove anything if we want and in the case of quantitative methodologies it's nothing more than a cloak for mediocrity to rule.

This Youtube clip is not new but I want to bookmark it for future reference on my blog so I can just share it with people who aren't convinced by what I'm trying to say in the hope that they will take the road less travelled. It's riskier but not if a proper conversation about how to solve any fears takes places. But that's a conversation that takes both time and courage. I'm also not anti research but a cookie cutter approacher gives cookie cutter advertising.