I think, in reality, this is more how it sounds: God says, “daughter, I’ve got this. It may look scary but my perfect love casts out fear. Remain in me. Stay in my perfect love and fear will leave you. Don’t try harder, believe me more! It’s your belief in me and my Word that will cause you to trust me in every situation to be good, gracious, kind, and loving.  I am your provider, protector, and your strength. You are hidden in me and seated in heavenly places. The same Spirit that raised Christ from the dead? He lives inside of you. He gives you power to do what I have called you to do. You have me – the Lord of Heavens Armies by your side in this. DO NOT BE AFRAID!”

Courage is choosing to not be afraid by choosing to trust God. That is not a popular notion. Nearly every day I see someone online or hear a speaker declaring that courage is being afraid but doing it anyway. The problem is that the Bible does not confirm this. I cannot find a single place that God tells us to be afraid of something and even more so just to do what we are afraid of anyway. I think it sounds good to us because we feel afraid and don’t know what to do with our fear so we tell ourselves to muster up the courage and do it anyway. It’s a dangerous trap that we need to be careful of. Fear is a spirit that God has not given us (2 Timothy 1:7).

We read words similar to “fear not” and “do not be afraid” nearly 365 times in the Bible and yet we continue to tell one another to “just do it afraid.” God tells us in Joshua 1:9 “Be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid.” We take the courageous part and make up a story to ourselves that feeling courageous means feeling the fear and doing the thing we are afraid of anyway. I think that’s why God followed it up immediately with “Do not be afraid.” He wants us to know that His heart is to make us courageous AND unafraid.

So, if God is telling us to be courageous AND not be afraid how do we do that? Fear is prevalent and I’ve fought those battles where I couldn’t feel anything but fear.

In the 23^rd Psalm David says this:

The Lord is my shepherd, I have everything I need.

He lets me rest in green meadows;

He leads me beside peaceful streams.

He renews my strength.

He guides me along right paths, bringing honor to his name.

Even when I walk through the valley of death I will not be afraid, for you are close beside me. Your rod and your staff protect and comfort me…

All throughout that chapter David – the one who fought and killed the lion and bear, who stood up to Goliath and claimed victory before he even saw the outcome – says all this stuff about how “He” (God) will do all these things but when David gets to the part about being afraid he turns the finger on himself and says “I will not be afraid.”

How did David determine that with such confidence that he would not be afraid? I think it’s because he knew he had a choice.  We all have a choice – fear or peace.

Jesus says in John 14:27 “Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.”

Do not let your heart be afraid. This implies that we have a say, a choice in the matter. Jesus tells us 2 times in that scripture that he left us peace and gives us peace. When Jesus left the earth He did something so amazing for us. He gave us the Holy Spirit.

In Galatians 5:22 we read what the character (or fruit) of the Holy Spirit is. “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.”

What do we have to do to have these things? Jesus already told us that He was giving us peace. And just like David made a choice we have a choice. We can stand and say “I will not be afraid. I choose peace. I am accepting what the Holy Spirit offers me and I chose peace and not fear.”

Have you ever seen a wardrobe valet for guys that is basically a place to set clothing, a watch, and shoes in preparation for dressing the next day? I believe that we have a spiritual wardrobe butler that is at our disposal each and every day. It holds the armor of God and the fruit of the Spirit. It is there waiting for us each day. It is ready and waiting and available but we have a choice about whether or not to pick it up and use it each day.

FRIENDS, WE GET TO PICK UP PEACE EACH AND EVERY DAY! Why wouldn’t we?? Why on earth would we just accept fear, wear it and live in it? Let’s stop. We can take God at His Word that He has given us peace. It is ours.

So, when you feel fear but want to trust God and do the thing you are afraid of anyway ask God for His perspective. Ask Him what you should be afraid of (hint: He’ll say nothing). Give Him your fears and permission to change you from fearful to fearless. Watch the courage He will give you to tackle what He’s asked you to do.

We get to be fearless when we chose peace over and over again. Fear will present itself to us over and over again and want to convince us that we don’t have a choice but we do!

Whatever fear you have holding you back from stepping out into God’s fullness for your life – I would ask you this – WHO TOLD YOU TO BE AFRAID? God never tells us to be afraid. The enemy of our souls is the one who always tells us to be afraid.

Imagine a world full of women who take the world by storm for Jesus because we have no fear?!

What is God saying to you today about your fear?

The post Courage Is Choosing to Not Be Afraid appeared first on The Beautiful Deep with Kristin Lemus.

My oldest daughter turned 20 a few months ago and, I don’t know about you, but I’ve spent a lot of my mothering time scared that I was going to royally mess things up.

I have been terrified at times that my daughter would one day leave home and not care to come back or like me much at that point. I think it’s a common parenting fear that the enemy tries to get us to dwell on but let’s kick this one in the teeth today.

Here are a few things I have learned that have been so very helpful:

Apologize like crazy – humble yourself when you are wrong and ask for their forgiveness. You are not only setting an example for them but also making your relationship right again when you mess up.

Deal with the stuff in your past that you are afraid of – If you made mistakes in the past and you are worried that they may have a long-term effect on your child (like feeling like you didn’t spend enough time with them at some point, or you were especially critical, etc…), instead of continuing to worry about how that affected your child, talk to them about it. You may find that they don’t feel that way at all or it may be an opportunity for you to make it right, ask for forgiveness and learn to meet their needs.

Find out their love languages and come up with a plan of action – Have them take the Love Language quiz online (for elementary school ages, preteens, and teens) and then create a plan for yourself to minister love to them in the way they best receive it. Put specific ideas on your calendar if you have to. An example may be to mail a card and candy to your son whose primary love language is Gifts or clean your daughter’s room for her if Acts of Service is at the top of her list. If you don’t have the book The 5 Love Languages of Children I highly recommend it.

Let your kids tell you what they need from you – Lay defensiveness aside and ask your kids how you can do a better job to meet their needs (once a month or so). Kids like to talk about themselves and they often know what they want/need from you.  This will only help you to be close and more open with each other. Plus, this will teach them to do this with their future spouse and kids.  It takes humility to let someone else tell you where you could step things up.

Learn to love yourself and teach them to love themselves – One of the greatest hindrances to becoming a whole person is not loving oneself. Be a whole parent by loving yourself and therefore teaching your children to be whole by loving themselves (this is not a selfish love but an acceptance of who God made you to be and gratefulness for your uniqueness). The best way to do this is to go on a journey to discover how much God loves you. Allow yourself the time and effort to come to understand how greatly you are loved. This will fill your love tank for yourself and then for others including your kids.  Also, take time to discover your strengths and gifts. Encourage your children to learn about their strengths and giftings as well. Model a healthy acceptance for the unique way God has made you and your children will learn to love themselves in the same way.

Don’t let fear of messing up your kids have a hold on you – When we are afraid of something and act out on that fear we are often causing the very thing we are afraid of to happen. Talk to God about your fears and repent for believing the lies that the enemy tries to get you to believe. If you walk by faith and hope in your great God and His ability to heal relationships, mend hurts, and fill you with love, then you cannot fail.  It’s the lies that drag us down and keep us in that worried state where our actions are based on fear and that is what drives our children away.

Doing these things is another way that we can step out and be Brave Moms. When we don’t let fear keep us from living life fully and moving forward (it’s never too late to make a change), we overcome and will see great victories in our mothering.

Have you dealt with fear about messing up your kids? What’s the thing you fear the most? Can you let it go today?

disclosure: this post may contain affiliate links for items that I really like and want to share.

The post How to Not Be Afraid That You’re Royally Messing Up Your Kids appeared first on The Beautiful Deep with Kristin Lemus.

It’s only taken me nearly 21 years to feel this way. I hope for you it’s much, much sooner.

Here are 5 ways I’ve learned to rock it as a mom.

1. Understand that it is a season

It’s all a season! I cannot stress this enough. The toughest times come and go and they are just seasons of life that change and end. I am currently in a season that has me in the car driving different kids to and from rehearsals and practices for 2 hours straight multiple nights a week. I hate it. I would rather be doing just about anything else than sitting in a car for 2 hours but I’m totally rocking it because I’ve decided to have a good attitude because… it’s just a season. These rehearsals and practices are only for a few months out of the year and I can do this.

It’s the same with nursing and potty training and temper tantrums. They are all seasons. They all end – I promise. Tween hormonal fluctuations come to an end. Sibling bickering stops. The sooner you understand that each parenting hardship is a season the sooner you will approach each one with a confidence that knows you can do anything for a season.

You’ve so got this season! You can rock it, girl!

2. Stop the overwhelmed cycle

Life can throw you a ton of stuff as a mom and it is SO easy to get in a cycle of feeling overwhelmed. Hop off the cycle before it gets the best of you. Don’t give in to feeling overwhelmed – it’s just a feeling, I promise. As soon as you stop telling yourself you are overwhelmed you can begin to tell yourself that you’ve got this and you will start to rock your schedule and your desires.

Of course, you also need tons of grace for yourself. Sometimes feeling overwhelmed is purely your own self-imposed idea that you should have it all together. Rocking it does not mean having it all together and being perfect (Oh, did I forget to say that?!). No, it means being confident in your ability to be a good mom. And you have that amazing ability!

3. Don’t be afraid

It’s easy to be afraid that you are royally messing up your kids but that fear will actually cause you to do some messing up. Let the fear go.

They love you more than you think, listen to you more than you know, and have way more grace for you than you have for yourself. Don’t let fear hold you back. Decide to be bold and trust God, with them and with you.

4. Be confident in who you are

You are the right mom for the kids you have in your charge. You can handle them. You are good at it. You can do this.

When you live life with insecurity everything you do is filtered through that insecurity. Ugh! Let’s not do that. Ask yourself this ever-important question – do I like myself? If the answer is not a quick and enthusiastic “yes!” then spend some time finding out why and learn to accept yourself, faults and all and begin to like yourself. You are pretty stinking amazing and you should think so too!

5. Trust that they are going to get it

You can tell a kid 100 times to do something and it can seem as if they will never get it. But, trust me, they will. You are sowing good seed into the ground of their hearts and they will totally get it one day. Don’t give up. Don’t let hard days be what you gauge your success as a mom by. You will have plenty of hard days but trust that they will get it eventually. If you let your sense of success be determined by your diligence and not their actions you will be rocking it the whole time. You be awesome whether they are or not and pretty soon they’ll be rocking it too.

What would you add to the list? How do you rock it in motherhood?

The post 5 Ways to Rock It as a Mom appeared first on The Beautiful Deep with Kristin Lemus.

Hi Friends,

I know I haven’t written in this space in a good while but I couldn’t miss the opportunity to share with you that Brave Moms has finally launched! Take a few moments and go check out the new site and follow along on social media (Instagram in particular because we will be sharing lots of encouragement there). This dream has been on my heart for so many years and it is finally taking shape. I share quite a bit of the behind the scenes and why I felt called to start Brave Moms on the Declare Podcast in case you’d like to listen. Speaking of podcasts… a Brave Moms Podcast is in the works and will be launched shortly too.

Thank you for all of the encouragement and support as I’ve worked on Brave Moms! It has meant so much to me. Can I ask you to share Brave Moms with all of your mom friends? Let’s build a movement of moms who know how to overcome weariness and make the enemy pay for all the ways he’s tried to harm us. 

The post Brave Moms Has Launched!! appeared first on The Beautiful Deep with Kristin Lemus.

For my readers who don’t know yet, I am on a team that puts on The Declare Conference each year. Declare is for women who feel called to blog, write, speak, podcast, and/or use social media and want to be equipped for that calling. I love being a part of Declare! We are so close to the conference this year. Only a few more weeks.

We are sharing some of the heart behind why we do what we do and linking up to get to know each other. If you are going to Declare I hope you’ll join the link-up so we can get to know you and if you aren’t coming to Declare the link-up is a great place to get to know some incredible bloggers. Go follow them. I know you’ll be encouraged and inspired.

So, here goes. Here are my answers to their questions:

1. When did you feel called to be a digital evangelist, what’s your main medium?

2. What is your life scripture?

3. What are your passions?

4.What is your favorite candy and/or food?

5.Where is your happy place and what’s it like?

Curled up on the couch on a rainy day with a great book to read and a breve latte or some Harney & Sons Hot Cinnamon Spice tea.

6. Are you working on any exciting projects that you can share?

7. How can we pray for you as you prepare for this year’s conference?

So tell me, what are you working on and what are you passionate about? I’d love to know.

The post Behind the Scenes – A Little Bit About Me appeared first on The Beautiful Deep with Kristin Lemus.