Puzzled Foreigner

Exciting Times

2011-04-23T15:32:00.000+08:00

Although I dont lend much credence to what rating agencies say, it is still interesting to see that S&P considers the financial climate more risky than in 2008:

Additional fiscal risks we see for the U.S. include the potential for further extraordinary official assistance to large players in the U.S. financial or other sectors, along with outlays related to various federal credit programs. We estimate that it could cost the U.S. government as much as 3.5% of GDP to appropriately capitalize and relaunch Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac, two financial institutions now under federal control, in addition to the 1% of GDP already invested (see "U.S. Government Cost To Resolve And Relaunch Fannie Mae And Freddie Mac Could Approach $700 Billion," Nov. 4, 2010, RatingsDirect). The potential for losses on federal direct and guaranteed loans (such as student loans) is another material fiscal risk, in our view. Most importantly, we believe the risks from the U.S. financial sector are higher than we considered them to be before 2008, as our downward revisions of our Banking Industry Country Risk Assessment (BICRA) on the U.S. to Group 3 from Group 2 in December 2009 and to Group 2 from Group 1 in December 2008 reflect (see "Banking Industry Country Risk Assessments," March 8, 2011, and "Banking Industry Country Risk Assessment: United States of America," Feb. 1, 2010, both on RatingsDirect). In line with these views, we now estimate the maximum aggregate, up-front fiscal cost to the U.S. government of resolving potential financial sector asset impairment in a stress scenario at 34% of GDP compared with our estimate of 26% in 2007.

There is an interesting blog post on washingtonblog.com with a selection of noteworthy news items showing the trends of the day. Considering all that, it sure does look like exciting times are ahead.

Can Ireland pull an Iceland?

2011-04-20T14:18:00.000+08:00

Max Keiser has an interesting short video describing what is going on in Ireland, and how crazy it is. It is pretty obvious that the only way Ireland can continue as a proper nation is to do what Iceland did. Of course, Iceland is not part of the Euro zone so its not going to be that easy. The simple fact remains, though, and that is that Ireland simply cannot pay for all the debt the banks have saddled on its shoulders...

See Max's videos below...

Pakakisima

2011-04-17T13:07:00.005+08:00

I was chatting with a friend of mine last week and for some reason we ended up discussing bad customer service from various companies in the Philippines. In my opinion, people are just too forgiving when companies make mistakes. People here take way to much crap from these businesses who are blatantly out there to rob you of your money. I was wondering if other people shared my opinion, and sure enough, she forwarded me her recent (and quite telling) experience with a big concert organizer.

Her story follows below...

You get what you pay for is a common saying. It is commonly used when we want to say "if we go on the cheap, we should not expect too much in return". But what when you do not buy something cheap? What if you buy something of great value, both in emotionally value as well as monetary value? You expect the seller to be held to high standards. If I buy a Ferrari I expect them to deliver one whole Ferrari, not a Tata Nano. Although the example is extreme, what about a concert ticket?

Like so many products, concert tickets have tiers. You can buy the expensive, top-of-the-line VIP box tickets which are right up front with the artist. These are the top tier. Then you can buy the middle tier, which are cheaper than the VIP box tickets because they are further away from the artists. Nonetheless, they have a fixed seating arrangement which is generally favourable and thus a good view of the artists can still be get. Then you have the lower tier, which are much cheaper that then middle and top tier. Here you have free seating, and you will not be sure of the view you are going to get. Clearly, when you buy the lower tier, you pay less, but you also "get what you pay for" so to speak. You may risk not seeing much of the artists playing because of the thousands of standing in front of you. So if you do not want to pay as much as the VIP, but still like to be assured of a good view, then the middle tier is a good compromise.

But what if the organizer suddenly decides to change the conditions? What if I bought a middle tier ticket and the organizer unilaterally decides to change it to a free seating arrangement? Isn't that a deceptive practice? Its like me buying a business class ticket to New York, and the airline unilaterally deciding that I should just shut up and fly coach in the back of the plane instead, for the same price! Would you take that?

Sadly, many people are.

In a recent study on consumer behavior, it was found that Filipinos are least likely to end a business relationship despite bad customer service. Our non-confrontative nature, perhaps due to our culture of "pakikisama" could be a reason. Then again it could also be a manifestation of acceptance -- acceptance, that we do not deserve any better, or acceptance that we can't do anything about it, so we should just suck it up.

Back to the concert ticket thing. Early March we bought two tickets for "The Script Live in Manila" Concert on 16 April. We decided to buy our tickets months in advance to be sure of a good seat. No sense in waiting to the last minute, pay a high price, and get a crap seat to boot, right? So we got two tickets for Box A with reserved seating. They were actually the last two seats left in our box, so we felt lucky at the time that we were able to get them.

A few days before the date of the concert, someone close to the producers tweeted that they will be selling Standing Room Only (SRO) tickets for Upper Box A as General Admission tickets. What? You mean to say that Box A had been downgraded to general admission and was now declared "free standing"? Shocked, and thinking this was surely a simple misunderstanding, I contacted them to clarify things. Surely our Box A would not be converted to SRO? Sure enough, our tickets would still have their reserved seats. Instead, they clarified, the *new* Box A tickets will be standing only. What? Wasn't box A supposed to have reserved seating only? And wait? Are you actually telling me that you just decided to stuff extra people into our box even though there are no more seats left?

When I asked why suddenly they are selling SRO tickets for an area designated as "seating" with pre-designated seating arrangements, the answer I got was, "because it's the only way to accommodate fans". What? You are trying to tell me you had no clue what the capacity was of Araneta Coliseum when you got the Script signed up for a concert here? You are telling me that, even though I paid cold hard cash for a privilege to sit in Box A, I should just shut up and accept that you guys need to sell more tickets "to accommodate the fans"?

Being the "unforgiving" Filipino that I am, I had to voice out my opinion that this is clearly an exercise to shake more money out of this venture, and *not* because you like for more fans to enjoy the concert. What about all of us fans who bought your "Box A reserved seating only" tickets suddenly having to suffer a stampede of SRO ticket holders in our box, blocking our view by standing in front of us?

Sure enough, I was eventually told, albeit indirectly, that it this was purely a business decision, and that we should not mistake them for some stupid charity. Yes, clearly you are not a charity, and if you were, I would not have minded accommodating more fans. No, you are a business venture, and we engaged in what was supposed to be a fair exchange. By exchanging money, we engaged in a contract. By me paying you the value you have set for your ticket, you are expected to honour your contractual obligation the moment you sold the ticket to me.

So you expect. Upon checking out the ticket terms and conditions printed on the ticket jacket, it appears that ticket sellers just want your cold hard cash and shut up:

See condition #1 and #5? Tney read as follows:

#1 - no refunds or exchanges on any ticket and/or transaction

#5 - the right is reserved to add, withdraw, or substitute artists and/or vary advertised programs, seating and audience capacity.

Wham! So, based on condition #5 they can practically change the artist, the venue, pack the audience like sardines, or altogether withdraw the artist. And worse thing is you can't even ask for a refund or exchange! This is not only bad customer service but lack of consumer protection at its finest. A slew of foreign acts have recently been seen including the Philippines in their tour. Filipinos, being the quintessential lover of all things foreign, are quick to shell out money to watch these concerts. However, unless and until you already get what you paid for, there is still the risk of sudden reschedules, failure to get refunds, refunds which take forever, and the artist rescheduling or the concert being cancelled altogether. Despite these, though, ticket prices in the country remain high. Ticket prices here are generally higher than in Hong Kong or Singapore!

You get what you pay for, at least when you're not in the Philippines.

After letting my frustration known, I have gotten comments that I should have gotten the VIP tickets for special treatment. Special treatment? What? If I gotten the VIP tickets I would have not been screwed? I guess they are telling me that, because I didn't just shut up and pay the highest price (more expensive than VIP tickets in Hong Kong!) I do not have the right to complain.

Thats just the way here -- when you complain people tell you just to vote with your feet... sadly that's what most of our people do. They leave the country and seek their fortunes elsewhere.

There you have it. You can buy a ticket to see Lady Gaga in a meat dress, and should not be in the least surprised when you get Willing Willie singing Poker Face dressed up in a crispy pata dress instead...

The Greased Pig

2011-04-15T14:07:00.002+08:00

I came across an interesting speech by Simon Johnson at INET. Simon Johnson was the former IMF chief economist and is now professor at MIT's Sloan School of Management. He is an outspoken critic of government regulators cozying up with financial institutions, particularly in the United States. In this speech he highlights the crazy situation we now have with "Too Big To Fail". Will anything get done about this? Have we learnt and will we be able to avoid the next slide into misery?

I sincerely doubt it. In a very interview on Bloomberg former FCIC chairman Phil Angelides compared Wall Street to a greased pig that is hard to catch. Besides this very telling comparison, his most interesting observation was that the US now has a dual justice system: "One for ordinary people and then one for people with money and enormous wealth and power."

Video of Simon Johnson's speech further below.

Simon Johnson speech at INET:

Corruption Worldwide Inc.

2011-04-14T20:13:00.001+08:00

When living in the Philippines you always hear about rampant corruption in all corners of the government. Well, despair not, it seems its really the norm all over the globe. In a nice article from Matt Taibbi (of the Vampire Squid fame - highly recommended!) it seems that the US has its fair share of grafters too. Be sure to check out his article The Real Housewives of Wall Street in the Rolling Stone.

Jeepney Howto

2010-05-25T17:12:00.001+08:00

As mentioned before, I have the intention to get my very own jeepney one day. To help me on my way, a friend of mine sent me this nice video HOWTO.

Ready For The Next Storm?

2010-05-19T22:31:00.004+08:00

So far we can conclude that we have weathered the election storm with relatively minor collateral damage. In a country where election violence is not uncommon, this is a good thing. But no sooner as the election season clears, it is time to buckle up for the next storm season - literally.

In about four months it will be the anniversary of typhoon Ondoy, perhaps the most devastating storm that has hit Metro Manila in a century. This typhoon, internationally known as Ketsana, unleashed untold misery to Metro Manila, resulting in hundreds of deaths and billions of pesos in damages.

When the new typhoon season is at our doorstep, are we prepared for another Ondoy? Granted, a storm like that doesn't hit every year, but that does not justify inaction. It is safe to say that Manila's infrastructure was in a deplorable state long before Ondoy hit. Even mild typhoons caused knee high flooding in the city's lower lying regions. I remember reading an article in the New York Times outlining all the things wrong with Manila's beleaguered infrastructure. It listed things such as clogged drainage systems, the lack of a Doppler radar station to accurately measure precipitation of coming weather disturbances and, most importantly of all, the lack of political will to enforce rules and regulations undermining the city's defenses against flooding.

After the storm hit, many bright minds came together to draw on the lessons learnt from Ondoy, and came up with various measures to ensure better preparedness in case another severe storm strikes. Most importantly, they also noted that the excessive rainfall and resulting floods caused by Ondoy may no longer be a freak of nature, but instead become a regular occurrence as climate change continues.

So what has been done so far? We have had almost one year to prepare for the next typhoon season. Has the Doppler radar been installed? Have there been improvements made to urban planning? Have waterways been cleared out? Have trash collection efforts been scaled up? What about reforestation programs to counter land slides? Have environmental laws and ordinances been enforced?

All questions to which I was unable to find an answer. Maybe you know? If you do, please leave a comment!

Automated Elections Accomplished?

2010-05-13T14:02:00.004+08:00

Reports of various PCOS glitches during the elections show that Murphy was still able to do some damage, but by the end of the day, Comelec was still able to overcome the majority of problems. As international congratulations came in, perhaps we can already say it wrapped up this automation thriller with a success?

After all, pulling off an automated election would be a major accomplishment in any developed nation. Considering this is the Philippines with its less then stellar infrastructure, getting all 50 million people (or 75% thereof) to cast their vote electronically is surely something to be proud of.

There were some organizational problems with the wrap up of the elections, but the speed at which the results came in, and the speed at which candidates conceded defeat, was certainly unprecedented. Although some are now recanting their earlier concessions, it seems a thumbs up for the people of the Comelec and BEI is still well deserved, and hopefully lessons learned from this election will be incorporated into the next (who knows, maybe the tweets from the PCOS machine will serve as an archive).

Speaking of the future, the results from this election show that Nonoy is number one, even taking Estrada country. As next president he will have tough challenges ahead. The thorny issue of Arroyo's Chief Justice appointment is just starting to brew, and Moody's senior vice president Thomas Byrne already came out with a stark warning:

"Aquino ran on a platform of transformational leadership that was heavy on rhetoric, but light on substance. The incoming administration will thus need to remove ambiguity on its economic and fiscal policies in the months ahead to shore up further the government’s credit fundamentals,"

Let's hope the rhetoric can be turned into real substance.

The Apples Of The Comelec

2010-05-10T23:48:00.001+08:00

Watching the ANC Comelec update, I was presently surprised that they are staunch Apple fans too. They were even sporting an iPad! Funny that only last Sunday President Obama criticized the era of iPad because it had turned information into a diversion that was imposing new strains on democracy.

Let's hope the Comelec iPad does not put any strains on democracy. More importantly, looking at the election results rolling in, I hope the Comelec was able to deliver an election with the same quality as Apple delivered their iPads and MacBooks.

Today Is Election Day

2010-05-10T12:56:00.004+08:00

The great test of Philippine democracy is currently underway, and hopefully things will go smoothly. In a country where election violence is not uncommon, the body count as polls opened already stood at 4. Against the backdrop of possible violence, ballot box stuffing, fraud, and other voting irregularities, any election in the Philippines is an exciting event. This one, however, is bound to be a down right thriller. It is the first election that is fully automated.

Having witnessed a few automation projects of a much smaller scale myself, automating an election for 50 million registered voters must be no small feat. Murphy is bound to rear its ugly head from time to time, and due to the sensitive nature of the process being automated, some people will undoubtedly see nefarious scheming behind any problem that arises.

This morning, the website of the Commission on Elections (Comelec) went down due to the sheer number of hits it received. This website is an important part of the election process since voters need it to determine which precinct they are supposed to cast their vote. As a work around measure, emergency hotlines where setup that voters can use instead.

The new PCOS machines also received their fair share of problems. On the eve of election day the Comelec reported preparations for the country’s first fully automated elections were 98 percent complete, but when polls opened at 10am this morning, reports from the supplier showed only a 15% readiness.

Nonetheless, despite the glitches and long queues of which even presidential hopefuls are not spared, voting does seem to be underway all over the country, with many people having the telling ink stain on their finger.

When the dust settles, let's hope the SWS polls are true that most would vote according to their conscience and are unlikely to be swayed by endorsements or political machinery. Let's also hope the people will trust the outcome of the elections despite the early glitches, and that presidential hopefuls will not not use it to stalemate the political system when they feel the results are not in their favour.

Election Holiday Madness

2010-05-06T23:16:00.001+08:00

Not only is there free fiesta during election time, there might even be extra holidays as well! Besides the election day holiday on Monday May 10, rumours are now going around that May 11 will also be declared a public holiday.

It seems that some are pressuring the government to declare the extra holiday since so many people will be going back to their provinces to vote. They reason that, with so many people out of town to vote on Monday, commuters will need at least the whole of Tuesday to return back to their places of work.

Deputy presidential spokesperson Gary Olivar said we have to wait until Friday to hear more on this matter, so stay tuned!

Alibi is the Weakest Defense After All

2010-05-05T16:43:00.000+08:00

In my last post titled Business As Usual I linked to an article in the Inquirer where former justice secretary Franklin Drilon was quoted as saying “Alibi is the weakest defense”, referring to Justice Secretary Alberto Agra's April 16 decision to clear two members of the Ampatuan clan in the Maguindanao massacre. Today, after assessing new evidence, it looks like Agra agrees.

The new evidence includes the testimony of a new witness claiming both participated in a meeting the night before the massacre. According to the witness, in this meeting a decision was taken to stop the Mangudadatus from filing a certificate of candidacy.

The new witness corroborates the testimony of Kenny Dalandag, who was the first witness to testify Zaldy and his cousin, Akmad, attended said meeting. Both are now in protective custody of the NBI.

Some will be asking whether Agra's decision today had more to do with the collective backlash he endured after his April 16 decision, rather than the new evidence coming to light. Whatever the motivation, it is good news that justice will get a chance to dig further into the truth, which is excellent news for democracy.

Good Morning Sir!

2010-05-03T23:22:00.000+08:00

On my daily commutes I frequently pass by two guards who sometimes, without shame or indignation afterwards, loudly say "Good morning Sir!" while its 8pm or something. I'm not sure if it's an honest mistake, or they simply don't care. Mistake or not, I suppose standing there whole day long and greeting thousands of passers-by can make you loose track of time. Still, it always made me laugh hearing it.

Since I notice the time zone confusion of those two guards, I started to wonder if this is a common ailment for all guards in the Philippines. I noticed that only a few actually do not know in which timezone they are. The guards at my condo, for example, never fail to get it correct.

Then yesterday evening, on my way back home around 7pm, the damnedest thing happened. The guards at my condo greeted me with a cordial nod and "good evening", and without me even realizing it, I loudly replied back "Good morning!". I almost topped it off with a loud "Sir!" too, but I was able to bite my tongue just in time. Although the guards just smiled back at me as if nothing happened (or maybe they were just letting my stupidity pass), I felt like a complete idiot. All this time making fun of guards who confuse the time of day, and now I was doing it myself!

Perhaps I should become a guard instead of a jeepney driver...

Justice For The Environment

2010-04-29T19:48:00.000+08:00

A friend of mine forwarded some good news. The new and highly anticipated Supreme Court Rules of Procedures for Environmental Cases was launched today. These rules aim to facilitate and expedite the resolution of cases concerning the environment, and is the first of its kind in the world.

In his column two days ago, Tony La Viña characterised the new rules as:

"... progressive, even revolutionary, in its protection of the environment and in ensuring effective access to environmental justice. The rules, which govern the procedure in all cases involving environmental and natural resources laws, are pro-environment, pro-poor and, if implemented well, can be an important step forward for environmental justice in the Philippines."

And its already been put to work. Today, invoking these new rules, a group of environmental lawyers led by Ramon Magsaysay awardee Antonio Oposa Jr. asked the Supreme Court to order the government to implement a 21-year-old law on flood control measures.

I believe this is a major step forward. Not only can this rule help in make the cities and their surroundings more habitable, it can also help protect the stunning natural beauty of this country.

Holiday Surprise!

2010-04-29T12:18:00.000+08:00

Yesterday Malacanang announced that May 3 will be a non-working holiday. After many years in the country, the concept of holidays in this country perplexes me. To this very day I still cannot explain the difference between "a non working holiday" and a regular holiday.

I looked up the definition of holiday and this is what I got:

A day free from work that one may spend at leisure, especially a day on which custom or the law dictates a halting of general business activity to commemorate or celebrate a particular event.

So by its very definition "holiday" means free from work. Then what does non-working holiday mean? I know some lucky people consider their work also their hobby, so perhaps it is to make clear to them that they too should really take a break?

Semantics of holidays aside, the concept of movable holidays was also novel to me. In most countries I've worked, the holidays were pretty much fixed. If they were not fixed to a specific date, they would be dictated by the position of the moon, or some specific event well in advance.

In the Philippines, holidays are more like surprise parties. You may suspect something is up, but you never really know when it will hit you. Yesterday I still believed labour day would fall on a Saturday, but the whole office turned into a frenzy when it came down the wire it was moved to May 3 instead.

Being thoroughly confused about all this, someone tried to explain that it has all to do with holiday economics. Holiday economics?

Apparently, the term Holiday Economics was coined by President Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo who introduced the policy in 2001 to reduce disruption to business and production schedules, and give employees long weekends.

OK, makes sense. Minimal disruption to business. It is generally better to have a holiday on a Friday or Monday so you do not need to idle things down in the middle of the week. This is great if I can plan for. Since planning takes a lot of time, especially if you have a lot of parties involved, we generally like to do it well in advance. Of course, you cannot take into account all eventualities, but the more you get out of the way now, the less you have to worry in future. Holidays are typically things that you do not need to worry about because they are fixed or communicated well in advance.

But wait, you are telling me we cannot plan for holidays because they announced only a few days in advance, sometimes only hours? So how again is this Holiday Surprise Party going to help me minimize disruption to my business?

Some say you should plan for these holiday surprises, expecting Labour Day to fall anywhere between April 30 and May 3. But why add more variables to an already hectic business environment? It is already difficult as it is.

If it is not going to help my business, perhaps Holiday Economics does encourage domestic tourism. People get extra time off that they can spend outside the house, thus helping local tourist enterprises gain more revenue. Unfortunately, going on a holiday here does require a bit of planning. You have to organize transportation, lodging, etc, etc. Oops! How am I supposed to plan a long weekend get-away with only a few days notice?

Of course I'm the type that likes to plan a lot, but surely others like to have some lead time too? I've asked various people to see if they are making good use of the new long weekend, and so far I did not get any positive responses. Most people said "no, because it's too late to book", others said "no, because I could not reschedule my existing itinerary", and the worst one "no, I had to cancel my weekend stay in the Philippines because my meeting on Monday got canceled". So much for benefiting the local tourist industry.

Going Nuclear

2010-04-27T00:15:00.000+08:00

On April 26, 1986 at 01:23:43, the Chernobyl Nuclear Power Plant in Ukraine suffered a cataclysmic melt down. To this day, it is considered the worst nuclear power plant disaster to have ever occurred, and it is the only registered level 7 event on the International Nuclear Event Scale.

On the eve of the Chernobyl remembrance day, I came across an article in the BusinessMirror where Acting Energy Secretary Jose Ibazeta was quoted as saying:

"There’s nothing wrong with nuke [plants] except claims that it may be in an earthquake [fault line]. And so far, after all the tremors we have had in the past 20 years, the pavement of the Bataan Nuclear Power Plant did not even crack,” said Ibazeta, adding there should be no fear of having nuclear energy.

Construction on the Bataan Nuclear Power Plant (BNPP) was started in 1977. In 1979 a safety inquiry allegedly found over 4000 defects, temporarily halting construction. By 1984 the BNPP was nearing its completion, but after the overthrow of Marcos, and the Chernobyl incident itself, a decision was made to mothball the entire plant.

Now, according to the BusinessMirror article, there are plans to construct US$ 4 billion worth of new nuclear power plants in the Philippines. A source was cited that the government is currently looking at the possibility of bringing in two 1,000-MW units of nuclear-power reactor from Korea, and that talks are ongoing.

The Acting Energy Secretary is quite right in saying that a properly constructed, and well maintained nuclear power plant is quite safe. We only have to look at Japan to see nuclear power plants in action close to a fault line.

However, we should not forget that the Chernobyl incident on reactor 4 was partly caused, rather ironically, by a safety test. This type of test had been run on the reactor before, but this time the test was conducted using new voltage regulators which had just been installed. Unfortunately, a proper exchange of information and coordination between the team in charge of the test, and the personnel in charge of the safety of the nuclear reactor, had not taken place. Therefore, inadequate safety precautions were included in the test programme, and the operating personnel were not alerted to the nuclear safety implications of the test and its potential danger. As the power-regulating system and emergency safety system of the fourth reactor were shut down for the test on April 25, the reactor was unknowingly placed in a state which primed it for a positive feedback loop. The formation of steam voids decreased the ability of the liquid water coolant to absorb neutrons, which increased the reactor's power output, causing yet more water to flash into steam, and yet a further power increase. In the end, reactor 4 exploded unleashing 400 times more radioactivity than was released at Hiroshima. The fallout was detected over all of Europe, and Chernobyl to this day is still not habitable.

Granted, today's nuclear reactors are much more safe than Chernobyl's. However, even if they are safer today, we should not forget that a major cause of the disaster was human failing. This is a view supported by the IAEA. Although the Soviet Union at the time did not have a stellar safety record, human failing has been the cause for other nuclear disasters as well. After all, it takes only one mistake to set in motion a sequence of events that can result in a serious disaster.

Then we should not forget the countless dangers that come with the disposal of spent nuclear fuel. Apart from choosing a proper site for storage that will withstand millennia, it only takes one unscrupulous person to get his or her hands on this material to create a dirty bomb.

If the reactors do come online here in the Philippines, let's hope all the proper procedures are in place to stop any human failing...

Spot the Driverless Car

2010-04-23T21:28:00.000+08:00

When I first came to this country, I bought an old beat up Pajero to help me get around the city. Having more important matters to do than clean my car, I always postponed a trip to the car wash as much as I could. I probably went once every three months. Come to think of it, I can distinctly remember being quite embarrassed about the muck and grime on my car. When you get stuck in traffic next to gleaming Ford Expeditions, Nissan Patrols, BMW's, and the likes, your lack of car hygiene becomes painfully apparent.

Besides looking like crap, the car itself was also crap. It was a classic Subic import and fatigue had clearly set in. I have been stranded on all major thoroughfares due to various mechanical failures. Many times it was "just" an overheating engine, and other times due to crazy things such as a disintegrated gear box. The worst one I had was a blown engine, all thanks to a shoddy repair job at some shady car shop along the Alabang Zapote road.

After all this craziness I can honestly say now that I know what it is like to be stranded on the fast lane of the South Super Highway, all the while Victory Liners are careening past you at speeds over 120 kph, with only millimeters to spare. Definitely not fun. So shortly after all this nonsense I decided enough was enough. I bought a new car and hired a driver who would shuttle me all around this city.

Finally while enjoying the luxury of being a passenger in my own brand new car, I noticed an additional perk: my car was always clean! No matter the weather of previous days, it would shine as if it had just rolled off the factory floor. It was then that I realized you can actually spot, with reasonable certainty, who has a driver and who doesn't. Point out any car that has a lot of muck on it, and I can safely say the owner of that car does not have a driver.

I was painfully reminded of this fact today. These days I do not have a driver anymore, and as a result my car hygiene has suffered as well. Again it is extensively covered in muck, and I still have no time to take it to the car wash. Thankfully, someone else understands my plight, and decided to lend a helping hand (or finger). They had written on my car's bonnet: Wanted Car Washer.

Thanks for helping out!

My Very Own Jeepney

2010-04-21T22:44:00.001+08:00

Nothing is more unique to the Philippines than a jeepney. With few public transportation options, countless people depend on them everyday. Although they fulfill an important public function, they are also regarded as a serious nuisance by other road users. They are incredibly noisy, infuriatingly slow when you are caught behind them, belch enormous amounts of smoke from their exhausts, and are generally a serious health hazard to any pedestrian.

A necessity for some, and a nuisance for others, the jeepney is such a quintessential component of Philippine daily life, I felt it was important as a visitor to find out more about them.

So I asked myself: what does it actually take to start up a jeepney service? What are the in's and out's, the do's and don'ts of the jeepney enterprise?

As a clueless foreigner I have been trying to find out, and this is what I have learned so far.

The Jeepney Route

When I first arrived here I could not understand how people knew where to wait for their ride. Unless you are at a bus terminal or some other large parking area, there is no clear jeepney stop anywhere. Coming from a country where everything is nicely organized and bus schedules are clearly marked at each bus stop, here things just seem to magically happen. People stand at the road side, and lo and behold, their ride appears.

Then I figured out that each jeepney has a route written on it's side, usually with other lavish adornments. So I guess the first step to operating a jeepney is to get a route concession from some government agency. I'm suspecting it is the LTFRB, but I still need to find out where and how to apply. In any case, assuming I get my concession, it is time for step number two: decorating the jeepney.

The Decorations

The colour and variety of jeepney is truly astounding. You have jeepneys covered in religious icons, jeepneys emblazoned with logos of Ferrari's and Lamborghini's (perhaps hoping they will be mistaken for one), and jeepneys with peculiar themes such as Playboy and the Sexbomb girls.

I guess choosing a proper theme for my Jeepney is very important, and after much pondering I thought a theme based on Eyjafjallajökull would be nice (the Icelandic volcano wreaking havoc across Europe), but I had a hard time pronouncing it. So instead I settled for a Dutch theme since their national day is coming up April 30. I will adorn my jeepney with windmills, wooden shoes, and other typical images from Holland. At the front I will put a big sign with 'Dutchboy'. That should do nicely!

Besides being a feast for the eyes, I also noticed jeepneys have nice car horn melodies, and make a distinctive chirping sound. I'm not sure what that chirping sound is all about, but my hypothesis is that it is tied to the breaks. No matter the purpose, I will have both play Dutch street organ music instead.

OK, decorations done. What's next? Ah yes, the crew.

The Crew

Obviously every jeepney has a driver, and in this case that will be me. After careful observation I noticed that every jeepney also has someone called a barker. Far from being a dog, a barker is the human equivalent of a megaphone. In Tagalog a barker is actually called a konduktor, which translates to the more mundane conductor. I just think barker has a better ring to it, especially considering the skills they need to perform their duties. When searching for a barker, the main qualifications to look for are: a very loud voice, able to repeatedly shout a jeepney's route in rapid succession, strategically herd passengers to a jeepney, and lend a hand in collecting fares.

Now you might be mistaken in thinking the driver's job is easy. Far from it. As far as I can tell, behind the fancy decor, jeepneys are basically just big metal boxes with an engine and four wheels attached. Meaning to say, no airbags, no ABS, and worst of all, no power steering. This means you need to be in a seriously good physical condition to navigate such a behemoth around Manila.

Apart from sheer human strength and endurance, a certain degree of nimbleness and dexterity is also required. Why dexterity you ask? After successive observations I noticed there is a particular method for holding bank notes. This method requires great dexterity. It involves folding every 20, 50, and 100 peso bills you got lengthwise, and then propping them between your fingers, all carefully arranged by denomination. The end result is a fan like contraption sprouting from your fingers. While you got all those bills stuffed between your fingers, you also need to steer the jeepney. Don't forget, no power steering!

OK, so after I hire my barker, mastered the art of propping bills between my fingers, and become sufficiently fit to steer a jeepney, it is time for our next item: the outfit!

The Outfit

Although jeepney drivers do not have a strict uniform, there is definitely a dress code. The single most essential part of the attire is the famed "Good Morning!" towel. It is carefully, yet with a flair of nonchalance, draped around the neck. This towel is essential equipment. After all, if I'm driving all day long around the hot, dusty Manila streets in an open vehicle, there will be plenty of sweat, dirt, and grime to wipe from my eyes.

Besides my good morning towel, I also require a fanny pack or wear cargo shorts. This will allow me to safely, yet comfortably, store my mobile phone, loose change, drivers license, traffic violation tickets, and other essentials.

As for the shirt, I think there is no real requirement. Perhaps a large basketball shirt, or any other type of shirt, that I can comfortably raise above my belly. Proper ventilation of all bodily parts is essential when driving in the Manila heat.

For footwear I think a nice set of flip-flops will do, or maybe wooden shoes in line with my jeepney's theme. I never found driving with flip-flops (or with wooden shoes for that matter) very easy, but I guess if there is a will there is a way. This also brings me to my next item: driving skill!

Driving Skill

As I already mentioned, driving around a lump of steel without power steering or ABS is not going to be easy. Besides this, I will also need to take careful notice of the jeepney driving ethics. This involves cutting off rival jeepneys as fast as you can, slamming on the brakes every few hundred meters to pick up new passengers, needlessly block traffic by make lazy U-turns (I believe the turning circle of a jeepneys is not exactly stellar either), and my personal favourite, driving carelessly in the middle of the road to strategically block anyone from overtaking you.

I think that covers the essentials, but I'm sure I missed some critical parts. Let me know if I did!

On a More Serious Note

Before I started this little post I was not aware of an initiative called Jeepney Magazine. In Europe we have something similar whereby homeless people are given a set of magazines which they are to sell. They get to keep half of the proceeds the earn from any sale. The other half goes back to the charity to support the magazine. These magazines are not some trash publication, but usually have some real good reporting inside, often covering neighborhood issues. Back in Europe I always try to buy a copy. I never knew one existed in the Philippines too, and from now on will keep my eye out for any vendor that sells them. I'm not saying you should to do the same. It could very well be that you like your money to be spent on other charities such as Gawad Kalinga. Nonetheless, go checkout their site and see what it's all about. You can even download a copy of their latest issue.

Picture sources
1. http://www.wikipedia.com
2. http://www.flickr.com/photos/andrecawaga
3. http://www.thejeepney.com/jeepney-a-solution/the-issues/
4. http://www.friedchillies.com/index.php/articles/detail/foodsters-favourite-50/P2/

Business as Usual

2010-04-20T19:50:00.000+08:00

A good friend of mine lamented today that her countrymen have such short term memories. Major issues like the Maguindanao massacre hit front page news one day, only to be relegated to the horoscope section the very next. I was wondering what she was on about, until I saw an article about Justice Secretary Alberto Agra having cleared two members of the Ampatuan clan of all charges. These are direct family members to Andal Ampatuan Jr. who himself is charged with the massacre of 57 people, including 32 media workers.

When dealing with such a high profile case, you would think that a Justice Secretary will only clear people if he has good reason to do so. However, it seems his own prosecutors think there was no good reason, staging a mutiny right on the steps of the Department of Justice (DoJ) building. Even the stock market took a dim view of the decision.

Then I remembered watching this video report on Al Jazeera about private armies in the Philippines. This report also discussed the recent massacre in Maguindanao, with a local reporter continuing to cover the story no matter the risks. He said it was the least he could do in honour of his fallen colleagues.

Now it's not everyday that I watch Al Jazeera (I'm more of a BBC World kind of guy) but I was impressed by the fact that they were able to file this report at all. Doing investigative journalism in the south is not exactly a safe occupation.

Watching this one reporter vowing to never let the case rest, I was hopeful the Maguindanao Massacre would firmly stay in the people's conscious. In so doing, it would force politicians not to play any games, and for once, let justice run its course.

Wishful thinking? Is my friend's pessimism justified?

There are now plenty of conspiracy theories doing the rounds in Manila, with presidential hopefuls hurling accusations of involvement at their opponents, and pointing out that Agra has long been an Arroyo insider.

I never believe an accusation made by a politician, and would rather see real justice run its course. However, when you read the reports of the wealth the Ampatuans have amassed over the years, it becomes hard to believe justice will prevail. If these reports are to be believed, they own no less than 35 houses and 121 vehicles, of which at least 53 being top-of-line luxury cars. All this for one of the poorest provinces in the Philippines. So much for 3rd world status. Whats going on here?

My friend, in the hope of explaining things to me, sent me this article. When I read it I was struck by the similarity of recent events. I was wondering why I hadn't caught this one on the news wire. Then I looked at the date when this article was published: Monday, Sep. 06, 1954! Is this all just business as usual?