Pykes Pile of Thought

1/26/12; The Grand Return

2012-01-26T00:03:00.000-08:00

It seems like ages since I discovered this place, and to think I only was here for a week...
Things are gonna be ~~a bit~~ much different around here from now on. No, I don't mean a new background. I mean brand spankin' NEW CONTENT all up in this bitch! You heard me right! I'm back in action, and this time I'm not gonna wimp out like last time. Get ready to set a new homepage, because considering how often you're gonna be checking this place you might be in risk of Carpal Tunnel in your blog checking hand. Also this post is gonna be video game themed.

Now let's get this started already!

The Almighty Random Thought of the Day

I can't tell you how many times I've played a game and noticed that the society within the virtual world does things that are so incredibly stupid it's hard to explain why they do it, things that either make life more difficult, or make the expected life span of any given person less than a week. Now there's an easy way to explain these inexplicable acts of idiocy, "The Governor of Earth." Here's two examples I've come up with.

Blast Corps. (N64): For some reason hundreds of trucks with the explosive capability of nukes are randomly going out of control, and wandering into towns. In order to prevent the truck from exploding, you must destroy any bit of the town that's in the way (which is usually a lot of it) so the truck doesn't hit it.

"The Governor of Earth recently instated a new law which requires that all trucks, that contain more than 5kg of explosives or radioactive material, may only be driven by a narcoleptic person. Should any explosive truck hit a building, the owner of the building can be fined for any property damage, and medical/obituary costs caused by the explosion. Should a demolition crew cause the damage instead of the truck, nobody is liable for damages."

Katamari Damacy Series: The prince is going around rolling everything up into a clump, and giving them to his dad so that he can set them on fire, and launch them into space. Nobody seems to try to stop, or even care about all their stuff, their family, and even their homes being "turned into a new planet."

"The Governor of Earth has decreed that Katamarism is a legitimate religion, thus anyone attempting to prevent the creation of a Katamari can be prosecuted for infringing upon the katamarist's freedom of religion."

Today's secret ingredient is...

The Mystery of Glass Joe's Victory

If you've played any of the 'Punch Out!' games, you'd know that the first person you fight in the league is Glass Joe, a sterotypical frenchman who is well known for being the worst boxer ever. He's so horrible that he's fought 100 fights in his career, and only once did he ever actually win. Question is, if Glass Joe is the worst fighter ever, who did he beat?

This mystery was once addressed by Nintendo claiming that, "Glass Joe defeated Nick Bruiser due to a freak accident." However this is where the plot thickens. There are three things wrong with this claim.

1: Glass Joe had his one victory in the NES Punch Out, while Nick Bruiser didn't exist until SNES Super Punch Out.

2: Glass Joe did not star in Super Punch Out.

3: Nick Bruiser's record before fighting Little Mac was 42-0 meaning he never lost.

Glass Joe couldn't have beat Nick bruiser because not only did they not exist in the same game, but Glass Joe won before Nick Bruiser was a fighter, and Nick never lost a fight.

There have been various theories as to how Glass Joe's victory came to be, such as the german boxer Von Kaiser knocking himself out by trying to attack Glass Joe with his moustache, King Hippo suffering from food poisoning resulting in a forfeit, or even Little Mac because some drunk guy was so bad at playing Punch Out he lost to Glass Joe.

We can never be sure exactly how it happened, but let it be known that Glass Joe is not a complete loser, just very close to it. At least he looks snazzy when wearing headgear.

Man that felt good writing all this! Hopefully you'll all notice that I'm back, and enjoy this post.

Until next time, stay sexy people!

Forget it...

2010-10-14T20:00:00.000-07:00

I'm so glad that this blog did as well as it did, but I've been finding it incredibly hard to think of ideas that can be put into words. I'm sorry to disappoint everyone, but this blog probably won't receive any new posts, and will probably be deleted. If I ever try something else I'll make sure to let all of you know about it.

Day 9: Dawn of the 10's

2010-10-10T19:26:00.000-07:00

What a day today is! 10/10/2010, it is! I'm honestly going to spend all day thinking of stuff to add to this post. This will be a 10 themed post because life means nothing without plenty of 10's! Let's not waste anytime then!

VRandum thought of the day!

Why is bowling such a passive sport. There should be more competitive versions. Like someone tries to protect the pins or something like that. Maybe someone stands in the lane and throws a ball at the ball headed towards the pins to stop it. Maybe all the pins could be filled with explosives. That wouldn't make it more competitive, but it sure would be fun to watch! You only need to touch one pin for all 10 to explode!

No random pic of the day... Webcam issues...

Special Special Special Special Special Special Special Special Special Special...

FAVORITE 10's

Here's a list of my top ten favorite things that relate to 10's!

#10: October! Being the tenth month of the year, it has many advantages, such as the best holiday, my birthday, and the end of it being so f*cking hot outside!

#10: Buying games from the discount bin! You never know what you'll find, but you know it'll cost $10 or less!

#10: 10pm, it's the time when all the good TV shows start being played!

#10: 10am. Waking up earlier than 10am is blasphemy!

#10: Binary! It's the language of all computerized technology, and it's written entirely of 1's and 0's

#10: Dimes! They're the smallest unit of currency I'm willing to use!

#10: Ten dollar bills! They always seem to brighten up my day when it turns out that I have one.

#10: Lists of top tens. They're always a good source of either information, humor, or timewasting!

#10: My dog Sammy, who's 10 years old, I think. She's the sweetest bitch!

and finally
#10: This post, which is my 10th post!

Hope you all had a good 10/10/10. I'm going to go sulk for having such massive writers block all day...

Day 7: Sh*t...

2010-10-08T20:41:00.000-07:00

I forgot to write a blog post, and I'm way to tired to do it now. I promise I'll make the next one extra good to make up for this madness.

Day 5: Getting Comfortable

2010-10-06T06:35:00.000-07:00

Ah, another day to write in the blog. Writing this regularly is starting to feel natural to me. At first I had to force myself to do it, but now it feels like a natural instinct. Also it's painfully apparent that there aren't many regular visitors. That's ok, I understand. This blog is taking it's first baby steps, and watching someone's baby isn't all that exciting. Let it be known however, that I will keep working on this blog until it's a big success. I'll keep working on it after that point too!

RaNdOM Thought of the day!

Turns out that posting a picture of yourself on a bad hair day into the internet is a very risky decision. There are three possibly things that could happen if you ever decide to do such a thing. It can be good, ok, or REALLY BAD!

Good: The nearest person to you decides to give you a haircut, and it comes out fairly nice!

O.K.: That person doesn't have much hair talent, and they mess it up a bit, but they're nice enough to buy you a hat.

BAD: That person drank WAY too much coffee that morning, and after twitching 7 baldspots into your scalp that'll probably never grow back, the biggest twitch of all swipes your ear off! (That must be what happened to Van Gogh... So THAT'S why the Mona Lisa's smile is so mysterious! Historic mystery SOLVED, fools!)

I think this was the good result! (Atleast I have my ear, see!)

And now, feast your eyes on the amazing...

Not so child-friendly Childrens Story!

I'd like you all to meet Ben. Ben is a beaver, and a fairly wealthy beaver! He had 110 sticks. It was enough sticks to build a dam over the annoying river that always is in the way, but he had a dream of making this a really big, fancy, special dam. He imagined all the other beavers saying things like "DAMN, that dam is HUGE!" "DAYUM! You ain't kiddin'!" "Oh Ben, your huge dam makes me want you so badly!" All that would be just on the first day. He knew gathering all the sticks to make this dam would take a really long time unfortunately, so he tried a quicker way of getting them.

He went to the local Luck Tree! Inside this hollow tree, people put their sticks at stake in hopes of getting more sticks than they ever could have hoped for. Many beaver's dreams have been made, and destroyed within this tree, and Ben knew if there was any hope of making the dam of his dreams, it would be found in here.

Ben walked in, and sat down at the black jack table. He had to put 5 sticks on the table for each hand that was played. He lost the first hand, but got a 21 on the second hand, he lost 4 hands after that, but won one more after that. Winning that hand made him happy, but what he didn't realize is that he had less sticks than he started out with.

He then went to the roulette table, a place where you try to guess in what part of a wheel, a little ball will land in. Ben put 30 sticks on black. The ball landed in 32 Red, and Ben lost the 30 sticks. He tried putting another 30 sticks on even, and the ball landed in 24 Black! He won back his 30 sticks from the first bet, and out of wild excitement yelled, "Let it ride!" This meant that the 60 sticks he had on the table would be bet on Even again! The ball spun round, and round the wheel, which seemed to last forever! He got very nervous as the ball started to slow down, and bounce around. Then he heard the roller say, "2 Black!" Ben jumped for joy as he won 120 sticks. That was more in one bet than he had ever gathered on his own!

The manager of the luck tree heard all the commotion, and congratulated Ben on such a win. He told Ben that he was allowed to have as many drinks of Happy Juice as he wanted, and he was more than happy to accept! Ben drank one, two, three shots of Happy Juice! This wasn't the smartest move though, because too much Happy Juice makes it hard to think about what you're doing! He stumbled back to the roulette table with his 150 sticks, and put them all on the table! "All my sticks on 1 to 18, spinner guy!" The spinner rolled the wheel, and soon enough the ball landed in 17 Black!

Ben now owned 450 sticks! This was just enough enough to build the amazing dam of his dreams, but he didn't want to stop yet. The crowd was cheering for him, and Ben imagined what would happen if he won again. He would have enough sticks to make as many dams as he could ever want. He'd be the king of the forest. He knew what he had to do, or so he thought. He yelled out, "LET IT RIDE!"

The crowd roared, and the ball made it's big spin. Once around, Twice around, three times around, four, five, six, seven, and then it started to bounce back and forth, hole to hole, until one of them caught the ball. "27 Red!" The crowd sighed with disappointment, and went back to their business. Ben had just lost all of his sticks, and was forced to leave!

He cried all the way home, as he had lost all of his life gatherings. His dream of a giant dam seemed impossible now. He looked at the annoying river, sat down, and thought for a bit. He knew that if he kept gathering sticks diligently, and never made a foolish mistake like that again, then maybe he could build the big dam one day.

Years passed since that day, and Ben now owns a very fine dam. It's not as big as he had dreamed, but he was happy, and he never had a problem with the annoying river again.

The End.

That's all for this post, but I hope you enjoyed this one, because it took hours to write! I'm going back to sleep. Comment, follow, you know the drill. Good Night!

hey everyone!!

2010-10-04T11:26:00.000-07:00

This is Jaime, Paul's awsome girlfriend..I am new to the blogs but I really look foward to meeting everyone....today I want to have a blog show on blog tv around 9 oclock new york time. you can find us at blogtv.com/XxJagz2EpicxX hope to see everyone there....CHOW!

Day 3: The Realization

2010-10-04T10:26:00.000-07:00

Ladies, and Gentlemen, it has become painfully obvious to me that I couldn't possibly do a blog post every single day, so instead I'll probably do one every other day. Even though I should be going to college this very minute I took the time to cater to your needs, because that's how much I care! So let's get this show on the road already!

RanNnnDDndom thought of the day!

Don't shower late at night. Don't shower as late as 3am. Don't shower as late as 3am when you're baked! You WILL fall asleep with wet hair, and WILL wake up looking like a crazy person! The only way this is acceptable is if you have nothing to do that day, or anyone to see that day. If this ever happens, make sure you have a damn good brush, and don't expect to look any good still!

Case and point...

(Hopefully I have a hat...)

Today's special soup is cream of...

Will it roll down the stairs?!

Today, I happened to have a Sunny D bottle, and wondered how far it would travel down a staircase. Needless to say, it's a fairly round bottle, so I had high hopes for it's flight! On the first trial, the one where I let the curve of the first step roll it, it smoothly went down each step like a champ. Trial #2, the one where I roll it from about a foot away, it skipped the last few steps, and slid across the dining room, scaring the hell out of my dog. Trial #3, the one where I hurl it at the first step, I threw at a bit too high of an angle, and basically threw the bottle at the floor downstairs. I'm surprised the bottle didn't break!

That's all for today's rapid-fire feature, but leave a comment placing your bet on if you think I'll make it to school on time or not!

Day 1: The first REAL blog day!

2010-10-02T14:43:00.000-07:00

Ah, it feels nice to sit down in my comfy chair, and get to writing. I'm still figuring out the general format of the blog, but I think it'll work something like this. First, a general chat about my day, next would be random thought of the day, along with picture of me of the day, then each day would have a special thing, such as "I think the world would be better if..." or "Does it roll down the stairs?" I'll make stuff up as I go along, and finally would be (if it's happening that day) the life hack of the week. This felt like a pretty good general chat, so lets get moving along!

RAnDom Thought of the DAY!

Why is it that I have to pay roughly $300 a month for car insurance when almost every time someone does something incredibly stupid, or dangerous and nearly makes me crash, it's an elderly person causing the problem?! I have to pay extra for all the stupid teenagers who drive like maniacs, while elderly people put me in almost life threatening situations! I'm not saying all elderly people are like that, but to me it seems like whenever I need to go around someone driving 20mph under the speed limit it's an old person I'm going around. There should be a law against such injustice.

Here's what old people get to see when I go around them! (I can hear myself saying, "Really?")

Today's special is

I think the world would be a better place if...

I think the world would be a better place if street gangs in real life acted like gangs in Broadway musicals. If there was a shoot out, both gangs would face each other in neat triangles, and tap dance at each other back, and forth for a few minutes.

*Tap Tap Tappity Tap Tap-Tap Tap Tap*
*Tappity Tap-Tap-Tap Tap-Tap Tap Tap*

*Random gun fire*

Nothings perfect, but at least it's a fairly amusing show before everyone dies.

and last, but not least...

This Life Hack of the WEEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeek...

iiiiiiiissssss...

Finally, here is where I would finish off the day with any cool ideas I might have for the blog.

That's all for today, but I hope you've had as much fun reading this as I did writing it! (Actually I hope you had more fun, then it's a profit of fun!)

Potential Blog Features!

2010-10-01T09:31:00.000-07:00

Here are a few ideas of things I'll write on this blog.

Random Thought of the Day!
(Pretty much what it sounds like)

Daily Photo of Me!
(Would go along with random thought, and most of the time relate to the thought.)

"I think the world would be better place if..."
(You'd have to see it to appreciate it.)

Weekly Life Hack.
(A featured pic of a life hack)

Talk to Pykes!
(An occasional interview with fellow Bloggers about various topics)

Also here's a few various things I may add to the blog.

A Music Player
(You know, for music and what not!)

Adsense ticker
(One that'll show how much money you ~~mindless peons~~ , my loyal and appreciated fans are making me.)

Go ahead and tell me what you think of these ideas if you like!
Just throw me a comment, and I'll smile!

The big first day

2010-10-01T05:41:00.000-07:00

Let it be known that on this fine day, I created my very first blog post, and there was much rejoicing! (hooray.)

You should give me some suggestions on stuff to add to this site by commenting on this post!