Queen of Non Sequiturs

um, yum

2010-01-15T04:29:00.001-05:00

I'm still going to make good on my promise of updating this blog semi-regularly, but I'd like to introduce a new endeavor:

HUNGRY BROOKLYN

Still alive. Swear.

2010-01-07T22:03:00.004-05:00

Wow, did I really not make one blog post in all of '09? That was lame. I've been neglecting this blog since early 2007. I wonder why...

Oh, that's right - I fell in love. Silly me.

So anyway, where were we? Um, Obama's our President. Initially I was excited - you know, halfrican solidarity and all. But he's pretty much turning out to be giant #@#! tease - pandering to all the same corrupt powers that previous administrations did. Sure! Let's vow to protect a nation that has one of the largest nuclear arsenals in the world while we allow their pebble slinging victims to have each and every human right violated!

If this healthcare plan doesn't pan out the way he promises, I'm done. I've grown increasingly unforgiving and intolerant in my old age.

Having said that, the propaganda that people choose to perpetuate about him is ridiculous. Reasonably intelligent people with obvious axes to grind and biases are willing to believe anything about him. I received an email from a woman who I would say is at least well-above average, ranting and raving about a super secret speech that ol' BAMA (side note: why haven't DC people taken to that nickname for our fearless/ful leader?) gave extolling the virtues of the "nationS of islam." Um, yeah. Do you really think that Barack HUSSEIN Obama would be able to give that speech, only for it to be swept under the rug and not have one minute of footage fall into the hands of Fox News or other conservative outlets?

Don't be so desperate to push your agenda that you make yourself sound like an idiot.

Now, the only other thing about the past year worth touching upon...

Michael.

I meant to take the blog after his passing. I wanted to write. I couldn't. It was probably one of the first times in my life that I was left without words. I realize a lot of people think it's kooky, but you can't imagine what MJ meant to me. Well, maybe you can - maybe now that you've seen the outpouring of love and emotion throughout the world. It leaves such a bad taste in my mouth. You celebrate him now? The accolades and praise bestowed upon him, after he can enjoy it, are all worthless. He was amazing in life and everyone should have recognized it. Don't kiss his ass in death.

A lot of my childhood milestones were cross-referenced with MJ moments. Moved to a country where I didn't speak the language and knew nobody - Moonwalker became my best friend and babysitter. Mother was diagnosed with a debilitating autoimmune disease - at least I was able to escape into the Dangerous record. Enduring an awkward foray in the first years of adolescence - hey! Michael actually SWORE on HIStory...what a nice way to match my angst. I started my very first week of classes at NYU the same week I saw him live for the first time.

It seems fitting (albeit heartbreaking) that he was laid to rest on the eve of my 25th birthday. I suppose that officially marked the end of my youth. But at least the perpetual Peter Pan saw me into adulthood, one way or another...it's unfortunate that he's not going to be around to watch his own children grow up.

On that note, I'll bid you farewell. Hope to see you before 2012.

You're stupid and nobody likes you.

2008-10-07T21:17:00.002-04:00

Those who know me laugh when they hear that someday I'd like to enter politics. I'm dead serious. I see no reason why I couldn't be the mayor of New York City someday. President? Not so much. The bulk of middle America would vote for me just about as much as they did for Kim K on Dancing With The Stars, but mayor - I could be mayor.

I am motherf$ckin' New York. I'm the daughter of an immigrant, I'm known to guidette it up upon occasion. I've got Bay Ridge on lock. I graduated from NYU, because that's what all the cool kids do. I'm enrolled at an Ivy League for grad school. I'm an entrepreneur. I'm also broke, but when I make my fortune, I'll be sure to remember being broke so I can relate my stories of hot sauce and popcorn to my minions while on the campaign grind. I'm totally willing to court scandal. I'll leak a sex tape to TMZ with my (at present non-existent) husband, then act all defiant and indignant when on Larry King, as I smirk into the camera. And I'm much cuter than Bloomberg. Or Guliani. Or Dinkins.

I can play the game. But then there's the little problem of me hating people.

Not all people.

Some. A lot. About half, maybe?

Just as within every type, I have a type of which I'm fond, within every type, I have a type that I loathe.

As I watch the presidential debate and see the people asking questions of the candidates, I can't help but marvel at the way (both!) candidates are handling themselves. I could field the Tom Brokaw questions pretty well. I respect Tom Brokaw. We're homies, I allow him into my apartment occasionally when I'm attempting to make some Giada or Rachael Ray-sanctioned meals. But the second one of the common folk comes up to the mic to ask a question, I can see myself, twitching...sucking teeth.... involuntarily shouting:

"Shut up, you're not smart enough to know what's good for you so go back to your seat and don't question me."

"And your mother told me to tell you that you're adopted."

Kinda defeats the purpose of a town hall forum debate, no?

Insomnia sucks me back in

2008-09-29T01:26:00.005-04:00

Where the hell did I go?

Without delving into too much detail, I can say that the past ten months have contained some of the most heart wrenching-stressful-amazing-contented-confusing-sad-enlightening moments of my life.

While one (familial) relationship seemed irreparably harmed at the beginning of 2008, another (romantic) relationship became something entirely different, wonderful, yet frightfully serious. The latter relationship is/was the first time I ever truly lost myself in somebody. It was nice - it's still nice - but it's hard for me to relinquish control over my emotions. As any of you who actually know me are aware, the only emotions that I'm totally comfortable displaying are anger and indignation. What a departure!

I made a bad decision to enter a professional situation that knocked the wind out of me, but it also opened new doors, so I don't totally regret it. Still, the fact that someone or something was able to shake my otherwise impregnable belief in my abilities is something I'm having a hard time letting go of...

Mortality has been weighing increasingly on my mind. This year alone my Uncle Tony, Tante Mervat and cousin Tarek passed away. The latter two died very prematurely. I turned 24 earlier this month (some pictures can be seen here, if you're interested) and for some reason that seems significantly older than 23. There's so much more I want to do in my life. Let's say I have kids at 30, but then drop dead inexplicably at 40 - how is it fair to leave those pre-teen children without a parent? I know that's not the way to look at things, but ever since Tarek died, I keep thinking about his two little girls who are without their father. Or my own mother and her sister, who were but 10 and 4 when their father passed away. People say to live for yourself, but I think the only decent thing to do is to live for those who are connected to you. That means taking care of yourself. Youth gives a false sense of invincibility, but vices come back to smack you in the face sooner than you think.

I'm all over the place, but it's 2am, so I think you'll forgive me. At least I'm writing again.

Until we meet again (hopefully soon),

J

We're cutting our losses for '07 and moving on.

2007-12-14T14:22:00.000-05:00

Jesus, what a year. Ups and downs.

got accepted @ Columbia for grad school, started classes
the "animal rights organization who shall remain nameless" fiasco
new clients: Souleo (who is killin' it right now...BET, Access Hollywood, Chicago Sun-Times, NPR...g'head!), Kameko, Bags By Chilli, etc.
the boy. oh, the boy. all kinds of good and bad going on there.
shake-ups at WeRoqq...really sad to see Sam leave the company, even sadder to see our friendship disintegrate.
made a few new friends, though. real ones, too, not just "biz" friends.
sleep? taking care of my health? i kind of forgot to do that this year.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go attempt to do yoga so I can say that I didn't completely flake out on '07s resolutions.

See you soon. Happy Holidays! Take care of yourselves and those you love.

xoxo,
J

Yesterday was my mother's birthday + excuses, excuses, excuses...

2007-10-21T13:54:00.000-04:00

So happy birthday, Mommy.

I haven't intentionally neglected this blog. The problem is that I've sort of lost my desire to write. Words are all I have, so when they start to fail me, it's a sign that my head and heart are going through shit - shit that I should probably address, but that wouldn't be like me, would it? Eh. I'll bounce back, I always do. In my final evaluation for my RW1 class, my prof wrote: "[Josephine] demonstrated ... a remarkable dexterity with details. Similarly, in [an assigned] court story about a couple in a custody battle over a son with cerebral palsy, Josie showed a real command of the material and understood how to portray the emotion of the proceedings and not just the legal entanglements played out before the judge." So you'd think I'd be better off, but no.

Some quick updates -

I turned 23 last month.

Lanie came to visit.

Matt became a farmer. Not really, but I ♥ this picture.

Erin gave birth to a baby boy, Odinn.

Kaja and I hung out while we were waiting for his arrival. I fed her. A lot.

Tasha gave birth to Ameiha.

Who then tried to eat me.

That's all. Maybe I'll update again sometime before 2008.

A little shameless promo in the morning

2007-08-07T10:21:00.000-04:00

You may have received emails/MySpace bulletins about Matt aka Young Damone being on Shade45 this morning, I didn't have time to put it up here. Don't fret...there's still time to bombard them with requests for him.

Let Cipha Sounds, Angela Yee and company know how much you looooove him by calling 1-888-Shade45 (742-3345) and emailing mailto:ciphasoundsfx@sirius-radio.com

Do it. Now. Now. Now. Repeatedly. For me? *insert sad face and eyes here* Thank you!
--------------------------

Also exciting, my first legitimate newspaper clip ever is out today.

Check it out: Mom-and-Pop Music Stores Slump in iPod Age - The New York Sun

It's today's lead business story. Very cool.

Remember me?

2007-08-02T00:04:00.001-04:00

I used to write a bunch of shit that you really didn't care about, but were kind enough to read?

I'm back.

Lots of things have been going on...

....started grad school, discovered that Norfolk is pronounced "nah-fuck" by those in the know, had (and still having) an interesting experience with my (figurative) heart, got into the Sopranos now that it's over (I always do that), fell in love with Bay Ridge while covering it for school (despite my best attempts to hate it), learned that friends and business really don't mix...

...and probably a little more. I'll try to be around more often now.

xo,
J

P.S.

2007-04-09T23:02:00.000-04:00

I got into Columbia for grad school. I'm getting a M.S. in Journalism with a Magazine concentration. Class of '09, but I start on May 18th. Not a bad look.

Weak update

2007-04-09T14:31:00.000-04:00

I interviewed Belly for Arabisto. Check it out.

I'm also name-checked in an article in the Connecticut Post.

That's all for now.

I like to steal things.

2007-03-16T16:02:00.000-04:00

Today I'm stealing from Julia Allison, who you may recognize as the white girl the far right took so much umbrage with Harold Ford Jr. dating. And she used to write a sex column. And I didn't really steal this from her since she stole it from The New Yorker, but why not give her some more traffic from all six of my loyal readers?

Name: Josephine Zohny
Age: 22
Job: Publicist by day/Writer by night
Neighborhood: Roosevelt Island. Whut.
Who's your favorite New Yorker, living or dead, real or fictional? Eloise. Have you ever been in The Plaza?
What's the best meal you've eaten in New York? Something at Luna's before it closed down. Oh my god, they used to bring me out so much free food and aperitifs. And now they're gone and I've died a little inside.
In one sentence, what do you actually do all day in your job? I talk (and write) a lot of shit, occasionally some of it is true.
Where do you get your coffee? My kitchen.
What's the last thing you saw on Broadway? Hairspray, with Jarrod.
Do you give money to panhandlers? Only if they have babies or dogs with them.
What's your drink? red wine
How often do you prepare your own meals? Pretty regularly and I often feed my friends. Sam's the only one to claim illness as a result, so I think I'm doing alright.
What's your favorite medication? any form of 'tussin. Yum.
What's hanging above your sofa? Framed James Brown, Michael Jackson and The Beatles vinyl albums. There's another framed Roberta flack in the kitchen.
How much is too much to spend on a haircut? Anything more than whatever Hair on Astor is charging these days.
When's bedtime? Lately, never. It's been a long week.
Brunch: pro or con? Pro. Very pro. Mimosa's all around!
What's your thread count? My sheets cost $5 and they're from a Doctor Leonard's catalog. You know, for the old people? They're shiny and awesome.
What do you hate most about living in New York? not being able to drive and listen the radio, people who never go above 14th street, everybody in Park Slope
What's your brand of jeans? If I'm in the midst of a "skinny for me" point in my life, Seven jeans are great. If I'm not and my booty is overflowing from out of the back of the Sevens, Immortality jeans are fab.
When was the last time you drove a car? A month ago? That sounds about right.
Who should be the next president? John Edwards
Times, Post, or Daily News? All three. The latter are necessary evils.
Yankees or Mets? Yankees
What makes someone a New Yorker? Being crazy-- mostly in a good way.

Mushroom Risotto

2007-03-12T11:51:00.000-04:00

Again, I apologize for the lack of updates. Most of my free time is spent doodling hearts on napkins and making googly eyes. Okay, not really...but almost.

Oh, and in case you were wondering - yes, I am doing Media Relations for PETA. I started last week and I've managed to get hits in USA Today, OK!, BET (although because of a certain person's publicist, it ended up being a no-go. boo hiss.) Family Circle and Fox News. Not bad.

Current musical obsessions - Frankie Laine, Roberta Flack, Bob Dylan. Nothing new, basically. I do dig that new Ne-Yo song, though. Very MJish.

I've been eating a lot, which is way more fun than going to clubs. Sam and I had Thai on Friday (at SEA on 2nd Ave and it was crazy good). Then, I went out for Japanese food with Rie on Saturday and had a little too much fun yelling (and drinking) "sake!" and embarrassing her, but she's used to me by now. Sunday was spent cooking for the week - mushroom risotto for lunch at work and Cincinnati chili for dinner (courtesy of Sam G from Ohio - thank ya, love ya!). I have to say, the mushroom risotto turned out crazy good, so I thought I'd share the recipe with you.

Ingredients:
1 cup of Arborio rice (medium grain white rice can be subbed if you can't find it, it's almost as starchy)
12 oz wild mushrooms (or the canned ones you have in your cupboard, it's not as fancy, but they work in a pinch - just make sure you let them dry out a little)
1 tablespoon fennel seeds
1 cup dry white wine
2 cups broth (veg or chicken are fine)
2 tablespoons margarine
2 tablespoons olive oil
1/2 cup grated Romano cheese (although I usually freeze mozzarella and grate that instead, feel free to use soy)
2 tablespoons basil
Pepper to taste

In a large skillet, heat the olive oil and butter until they melt on high. Add mushrooms and fennel seeds and heat 1-3 minutes, until sufficiently heated through and tender. In a separate pot, heat up the broth on low, just to keep it warm. Turn down the heat to medium and add the rice to the skillet. Then, add 1/2 cup of the wine, making sure that it's absorbed (about 3 minutes) before adding the rest. After the wine is soaked up, start adding the broth, a half cup at a time, making sure it's fully absorbed before adding more. Stir often. It should take about 25 minutes for all the broth to be fully absorbed. Add the cheese and basil, stirring through to make sure all the cheesy-basily goodness melts and makes its way throughout. Season with cracked pepper to taste.

Enjoy!

Death Row and other thoughts.

2007-02-18T19:28:00.000-05:00

Before we discuss Suge & company, I want to apologize for being MIA lately. Granted, I always disappear around this time of year because I hate the cold and turn into (more) of a misanthropic hermit, so I'll spare you the excuses. I've just been busy...in mostly a good way -kind of a great way, actually.

Lent is just around the corner - are you guys giving anything up? I'm doing my traditional giving up sweets, but this year I'm switching it up a little bit and depriving myself of dairy, too. Of course this has nothing to do with Beyonce looking hot as all get out on the cover of Sports Illustrated or the fact that I may have back-ordered the swimsuit she sports on the cover and need to look at least 1/3 as good as she does in it.

Of course not. Nothing, nothing at all. You know me, I'm all about piety.

Also, I have a blog up at Arabisto, should you wish to check that out. I've been neglecting my blogging duties over there, as well. At least I'm an equal-opportunity slacker. Thanks to my editor/Arabisto's founder, Nadia, for being so understanding. She rocks.

Anyway, yesterday my new friend and I were watching some low-budget documentary on the rise and fall of Death Row Records. Considering that it probably cost all of $29.72 to make, it was pretty well done. Some of you might remember when I met Suge Knight, the man behind the empire, back in 2004ish. I think he was in between jail stints at the time. His presence itself is frightening and not just because he's a big guy. He just has this aura that strikes fear into pretty much everybody's heart as soon as he enters a room. Once he speaks, some of that initial terror dissipates because he has a slight speech impediment and his voice is kind of on the high side, but until he opens his mouth you're shaking in your boots (stilettos, whatever). He wanted to know how old I was. I told him 12 and ran away. Literally ran away. Now, I don't run and especially not in heels, so you can imagine just how scared I was. But in addition to being frightening, he was also a smart man who managed to fuck-over the world's biggest fuck-over artists to get to the top. That has to be respected. One thing the documentary did a good job of doing is highlighting just how great the label could have truly been, had Suge's enormous ego not gotten in the way. If you're the man behind a shady empire, you can't have your ass on the cover of The Source. It is a shame that Jimmy Iovine got to profit $400 million in large part because of the hip-hop dynasty Suge et al. created and he did little to cultivate.

Then I fell asleep at 10pm. Because I'm just that lame. And I'm getting ready to do it again. Later!

Creepy

2007-01-17T21:41:00.000-05:00

The new winner for weirdest search someone used to get to my website is....drumroll, please....

"Arab Fishnets"

I can only assume that they were trying to find raunchy pictures of Tony Shaloub.

Cannoli is fine.

2007-01-11T18:56:00.000-05:00

She's back home and doing well, not 100% yet, but she's definitely better. Thank you all for your concern. Yay Cannoli!

:(

2007-01-08T22:30:00.000-05:00

*sniff*

My beloved hound is in the hospital. Cannoli was throwing up all morning, so violently that her eyes and snout were all puffy and swollen from the force of the vomiting. I took her to the animal hospital where she was admitted for an IV and observation. Poor baby. She cried when they muzzled her (after she tried to kill them with her ferocious teeth, of course). It was such a sad sight. My poor kinder hund :(

In happier news, I have a new boyfriend (if you're reading this via Facebook feed, follow the link to the original post):

Random -

In case you were wondering, this is what I would look like if my mother had chosen to procreate with...say, a Swede instead of my father:

So, yeah, I look like a girl I debated alongside in high school.

Here's me as an East Asian:

If I were Wesley Snipes, I'd date me.

And just for fun, here I am as a Modigliani painting:

Images courtesy of Face Transformer.

That's all for now. Think good thoughts for Cannoli.

Bidding adieu to 2006

2006-12-28T13:13:00.000-05:00

YAY: Moved into my own awesome, awesome, awesome apartment. Alone. Mine. So rad.

BLAH: Navigating the politics of friendship, post-college, was something in which I definitely didn't excel.

YAY: I learned that I truly do love the friends I have now.

BLAH: Restlessness in my career. After a life spent in warp-speed, it was kind of a shock to just be for a little bit.

YAY: Creatively reinvigorated. Towards the close of the year, my mission became clear.

BLAH: Watching people whom I care for suffer in various ways and not being able to fix their situations.

BLAH: Not being able to fix my own damn situations, either.

YAY: Learned to cook! I made good on one of my new year's resolutions.

BLAH: My heart broke into a million little pieces.

...YAY?: In the process of trying to glue it back together, I met some interesting people who will, at the very least, provide good fodder for future writing.

YAY: Cannoli!! The most important YAY of them all. She was truly the best thing to come out of 2006. Yes, I am a crazy dog lady - but it's not pathetic yet because I'm still about 20 years away from old maid territory. And yes, she did get a (faux) mink for Christmas.

Next up in 2007? I'm forcing a friend to do yoga with me and starting classes to improve my embarrassingly bad Arabic. The rest? Who knows, but I'll make sure to keep you updated.

Be safe and have fun on NYE! See you next year!

NP: "Santa Claus, Go Straight To The Ghetto" - James Brown

2006-12-25T11:05:00.000-05:00

Merry Christmas, if that's your thing. Happy Hanukkah, Kwanzaa and an early Eid Mubarak, too.

Sadly, I have no yuletide joy to spread today. Early this morning, James Brown passed away. It all seems so unfinished. James Brown shouldn't have died in a hospital at 73 years old. He should have lived to be 105 and died on stage, while performing, preferably with his cape being placed upon his shoulders. I'm so grateful that I got to see him live (twice!) before he left us. He had his demons, sure, but who the hell cares? He was James motherf%$#ing Brown.

I'm going to spend the day listening to James Brown's Funky Christmas. I suggest you pour a little bourbon into your egg nog and do the same.

James Brown 1933 - 2006

All I want for Christmas...

2006-12-17T21:09:00.000-05:00

Gold Hooker Boots!!!!!!

Available @ Vicky's Secret.

I really, really, really need these in my life. Yes, they're tacky. Yes, my own mother would pretend not to know me if she saw me walking down the street in them. But c'mon! They're gold! They have sequins! They're thigh-high!

Ho! Ho! Ho!

Vigil.

2006-12-12T09:47:00.000-05:00

Read.

Ahmet Ertegun is very ill. After falling at a Rolling Stones concert earlier this year, his doctor has announced that he sustained a serious brain injury and has little chance of meaningful recovery.

The son of a Turkish diplomat, Ahmet came to this country at age 11 and went on to found Atlantic Records, making it the premier home of jazz and R&B. From Ray Charles to Aretha Franklin to rock Gods like Led Zeppelin, Atlantic shaped popular music history.

I was lucky enough to meet Ahmet back in 2003 and it was one of the few times that I was genuinely star struck. Unlike many executives today, he truly loved music. His appreciation for it made its way into every conversation, he couldn't help it. Sure, he was a great businessman, but that never took precedence over the music.

So light a candle - even mentally will do - and think good thoughts for Mr. Ertegun. I'm hoping that a miracle intercedes because once he's gone, a large part of the soul of the industry dies, too.

Toxic women in the workplace

2006-12-08T13:25:00.000-05:00

Quick updates -

I was looking over at my clips and realized that I haven't updated them in about a year. I'll soon be scanning my pieces from 2006 and putting them up on the website just in case you haven't had a chance to pick up copies to keep for your very own. I'm also getting ready to interview one of the members of Luscious Jackson about her solo project, so that will be cool. Not quite the Jackson I would have hoped for, but not bad.

I have a new blog up over @ Arabisto on the subject of Combating racism in the Arab American community. Check it out.
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Now, onto today's post - toxic women in the workplace. Recently, I was in talks with an organization to do some freelance work for them. Despite the fact that three of the people making the decision were thrilled that I'd consider working with them, one woman made sure to constantly chime in to undermine me. At first it was, "Well, your resume isn't the most impressive, but..." Really? My resume was impressive until you saw me and figured out that I'm significantly younger than you, but whatever... Then it escalated to "How much time would you have to devote to this project in between doing your makeup and hair?" What the fuck? One, since when are taking care of your appearance and being competent at your work exclusive of each other? And two, if you know me, you know that I barely wear makeup. A little concealer under the eyes to make it look like I occasionally sleep and some eye makeup - and not all the time. And Lord knows my hair always looks a hot mess!

In previous positions, I've dealt with women who had a preoccupation with the way other women at the job looked. There was the woman I now affectionately refer to as Cow Cunt who acted offended by the sight of my body. If I came into work with a skirt that so much as grazed the knee area, she'd remark that I looked like a whore. Of course, her opinion was instantly invalidated when our boss came in and said that I looked cute - but she would have worn fishnets instead of tights that hide everything. Cow Cunt was masking her insecurity about the fact that I was more than half her age, better liked and a strong contender for her job, but she chose to take it out on my choices of wardrobe. Then, there was the HR person at an unnamed indie label who, at various times, told me that I was balding (erm, no. i have hair to spare. catch me first thing in the AM), that I needed a nose job (eh, maybe) and that I looked like I bleached my skin (mercury poisoning, no thanks).

What does how you think I look have to do with your job? What does it have to do with my job? Whether I'm in a dowdy power suit or a dazzling Pucci dress (ha! I wish!), I do my work. The new rule of thumb should be - if you wouldn't say it to a man, don't say it to me. Deal?
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Before I go, I want to wish a very Happy Birthday to my best friend Tasha, who turns 23 today. It's also the Feast of the Immaculate Conception, but considering that Tasha is the mother of my two goddaughters, I'd say that the events coinciding is just a coincidence. Ohhh, low blow! You know I love you, Tash ;)

Also, if you're in the DC area, please check out the Annual Souk and Olive Harvest tomorrow. It celebrates the annual olive harvest in Palestine and you can support Palestinian farmers by purchasing bottles of olive oil imported from Palestine. The event runs from 11am - 4pm and is located at the The Jerusalem Fund Gallery, on the ground level of the Potomac Plaza Apartment Building at the intersection of New Hampshire and Virginia Avenues, NW. I'll be there in spirit! Mmm...olive oil.

Lastly, check out Beyonce showing MJ some looooove at the WMA (pictures were posted a while ago).

Too cute. Later!

We are family.

2006-11-28T21:12:00.000-05:00

My cousin Malaak and her daughter Salma were in town for a few days. It was great seeing them. Salma's the cutest thing in the entire world and I just want to pinch her face all day long - which would be fine, except that she's 19.

She's so cuuuute. Squish.

An unfortunate incident occurred while we were eating in Times Square. We were seated by the window and a man decided to shout offensive things and make obscene gestures at Salma because she was veiled. Sad. Salma's been to the US enough to know that he doesn't represent all Americans...at least I hope he doesn't.

As you can probably tell from the picture, I'm exhausted. I'm going to try doing this thing I've heard about...sleeping? Nite-nite.

2006-11-16T20:25:00.000-05:00

I've got a blog on dating up @ Arabisto. It was inspired by some arguments I got into on a facebook group. And yes, I do agree with this (inappropriate) sentiment.

I recently interviewed Bloc Party for Zink and I now have a giant crush on the bassist. There's something about skinny, anemic, almost-dead looking white boys that does...um, something for me.

I don't care what anybody says!

2006-11-16T04:38:00.000-05:00

I *heart* MJ. And you do, too. Even if you don't, you do.

Shut up. He can be around as many damn kids as he wants.

Roberto Cavalli designed his outfit. Sharp. It's one of those things that wouldn't look right on any other human being, but works on Mike.

Oh, look, it's my two favorite people together! Bouncy hearts MJ more. So much so that she decided to shout it in the middle of her speech and start chanting "Michael! Michael!" like a nutty fan girl. This is why she's my pretend girlfriend.

You've already ordered your advance ticket. Admit it.

2006-11-10T20:23:00.000-05:00

Beyonce And Eva To Play Lovers In "Tipping The Velvet"

Beyonce, 25, thinks it is time the world was treated to a classic lesbian love story.
The singer, who was speaking at a New York benefit for ovarian cancer, said, "We've had 'Brokeback Mountain' so the time is right for this divine novel to get the same treatment."
Beyonce and Eva are said to be incredibly excited about the steamy love scenes and can't wait for filming to begin.
A source revealed, "They weren't at all coy about the sex scenes. In fact they both seemed to think it would be more fun than doing the same work with a man. It's going to be very hot."