Quelle's Thoughts

Goodbye Elena

2017-05-28T20:35:00.002-04:00

Me and Elena

Today I said goodbye to my beloved car Elena. She was a beautiful red 2005 Toyota Corolla. I bought her in September of 2004 with the help of my father Rafael. It was the first major purchase I made after I officially started my post-college career. I named her Elena Tverskaya because the initials on the license plate were ET. Elena is my middle name and Tverskaya was from a book I had just read, Anna Karenina.

Elena became the symbol of my new found independence. At first we would take long 1 hour commutes from my home town to my work in the city. Eventually I moved out of my parents' home and into my first apartment. I lived alone and I relied on Elena for everything. She was how I got to work, how I took myself to see my parents, to go to the supermarket, to go to the doctors, to travel and explore. I was living by myself in the city and frankly I was lonely. When I started graduate school I made a promise to myself that I would make new friends. Elena helped me. With her we would go to social gatherings, parties, out to dinner, etc. When I really stepped out of my shell and started dating, I met my future husband Carlos and I drove her to where we had our very first date. In fact, it was standing by Elena when Carlos and I had our very first kiss.

For almost 13 years she proved to be a reliable vehicle and always kept me safe. I endured a scary accident on an off ramp. Elena took the hit and I remained for the most part unhurt. When that happened my father helped me get her muffler fixed and replace the dented bumper. My father helped me a lot with my car. He was there when I bought it. He paid for the vehicle and I tried to pay him back over the years but only got about half way there. I always felt bad that I couldn't completely pay him what I owed. Any time my car needed maintenance, a tune-up, an inspection, an oil change he was there to help me out. Every time I'd drive the car the 40 some odd miles to my parents house, he'd always inspect the vehicle, fill it up with gas and check the oil. My dad wasn't a very expressive guy but he showed me he loved me by his actions more than his words. I lost my father in 2015 and I miss him every day.

I didn't quite realize how attached I had become to Elena and how parting with her would cause me so much anguish. It wasn't until having to give her up became a reality that it hit me. Letting go of Elena meant letting go part of my history with my dad. It also meant moving on from 13 very important years of my life. This wasn't going to be easy.

One last ride with Elena

On Saturday I took one last drive to my hometown with Elena. My mother and I went to my dad's grave. I stopped to thank my dad for all his help over the years with Elena. That car gave me my independence and security.

I had to let Elena go. Overall she was in good condition but work on her brakes and fuel neck would cost thousands of dollars, money that could go to a new vehicle. This was after years of other repairs that would drain my bank account. It was time for a new car. I would have to move on.

One last look at Elena before I drove off the lot.

I know it sounds silly to be so attached to a vehicle but think of how many memories are attached to them. They take us on journeys that become part of the fabric of our lives. Good cars are important. Elena was a good car.

Thank you Pai for Elena and for everything.

San Francisco

2017-04-17T22:43:00.001-04:00

How well do I know my husband? Questionnaire

2016-04-05T19:00:00.000-04:00

Carlos with his favorite cocktail

I saw this questionnaire on Facebook and thought it was fun. How well do I know my husband Carlos? Read below and find out.

He's sitting in front of the TV, what is on? House of Cards, Flip or Flop, Jeopardy!, some car show
You're out to eat; what kind of dressing does he get on his salad? Newman’s Own Olive Oil and Vinegar Dressing
What's one food he doesn't like? Mushrooms, eggplant, artichokes, beets, broccoli, cauliflower, pretty much anything I think is delicious.
You go out to eat and have a drink; what does he order? Meatloaf or Pizza. He usually has an iced tea and his favorite cocktail is a Greyhound (grapefruit juice and vodka)
Where did he go to high school? A prep school
What is his nickname for you? Pookie
If he was to collect anything, what would it be? Movies on Blu-Ray and Books
What would he eat everyday if he could? His menu for the day would be Breakfast – eggs and tea; Lunch – a sandwich or a slice of pizza; Dinner – meatloaf, corn, mashed potatoes and pickles or cucumber salad
What is his favorite type of sandwich? An Italian Sub
What is his favorite cereal? He eats eggs and drinks hot tea in the morning. No cereal.
What would he never wear? Something ill-fitting
What is his favorite sport? Racecar driving
Who did he vote for? Bernie Sanders
Who is his best friend? Kelly and Danielle
What is something you do that he wishes you wouldn't do? Pass gas
What is his heritage? Colombian and Chilean
You bake him a cake; what kind of cake? Cheesecake
Did he play sports in high school? He was a scrawny teen so I’ll say no.
What could he spend hours doing? Researching Jim Morrison and The Doors
What is one unique talent he has? Putting together a great outfit for himself and for others. He’s got an eye for color and pattern.

Juan E. Moises (1927-2015)

2015-01-19T12:33:00.000-05:00

Juan E. Moises (1927-2015)

Juan E. Moises died Friday evening January 16, at Mount Sinai - Saint Luke's Hospital in New York City. He passed away peacefully after a long illness, surrounded by loving family members. Juan was 87 years old. He was born in Tamboril, Dominican Republic, on February 22, 1927. He was the son of Juan Moises, a native of Syria, and Juana Perez (born in the Dominican Republic). Juan came to New York City from the Dominican Republic in 1967 to work in the hotel industry. He retired in 1997 after 30 years of dedicated service. Juan is survived by seven daughters: Sarah, Raquel, Elvita, Teresa, Xiomara, Albania, and Margarita. He is also survived by his three sons: Johnny, Arturo, and Alberto. Juan has 14 loving grandchildren, many great grandchildren, and numerous nieces and nephews.

God Speed Juan Moises, My Grandfather/Mi Abuelo

2015-01-16T21:20:00.002-05:00

Abuelo and I circa 1991

I don't know exactly when my grandfather Juan was born. Some time in the early 1930s. There is a lot I don't know about my grandfather, mi abuelito, that I wish I had.

My grandfather died tonight at 8:15 pm. I knew he was dying but I was in denial about it. I had a chance to talk to him on the phone but didn't. He was my only living grandfather, my paternal grandfather passed away before I was born, but he was mostly a stranger to me. The first and last time I saw him was in the summer of 1991 when I was 10 years old. I wish I could have spent more time with him but family relations kept us apart. I hope he knew he was loved and that he rests in peace.

Here are some photos from the time I got to visit him in NYC. Descansa en paz abuelito Juan.

My aunt Raquel, my mom, my grandfather and me.

My grandfather top left and my grandmother top third from the left.

My grandfather with his identical twin daughters Sarah (my mom) and Raquel (my aunt and namesake)

Abuelo Juan and me

Words of Wisdom I Live By

2014-09-18T09:00:00.000-04:00

The 5 Cs of copy editing on a post-it on my cubicle wall.

The 5 Cs of copy editing: Clear, Correct, Concise, Compete, Consistent - I learned the 5 Cs in graduate school when I took a course on copy editing. I never became a copy editor but I found the 5 Cs to be great guidelines for work, especially with e-mails, and for writing. Out of all the Cs, consistency has been the most important to me and it really changed my work ethic.

How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time. - Whenever I'm faced with a task or a problem that seems too large to tackle, I think of this. Compartmentalizing the task into smaller steps (or bites) and focusing on each step before moving on to the next, makes the world of difference. It makes the impossible seem possible.

You can’t control what other people do, you can only control what you do. - People "should" but chances are they "don't". Realizing that you can't control people gives you back a lot of control. When you expect others to do certain things or to be controlled by you, you make yourself vulnerable to what their decisions. These words of wisdom are crucial for my sanity and for safe driving!

Once you hit rock bottom, there is no where to go but up. - It seems like a cliche but it's really the universal truth. I always find that at the worst of times happiness is waiting just around the corner.

It's okay to say "no". - Recently, I asked four different advertisers a question. I knew the answer would be "no" but was hoping by chance one or two of the responses would be "yes". None of them actually said "no" yet essentially that was their answer. Instead of saying "no" they decided to antagonize me because I dared ask the question. Their responses were cowardly and unprofessional. Be up front with people and say "no". It's not a sign of weakness. And don't be afraid to say "no" to opportunities you're not interested in or one that will hurt you more than help you.

What words of wisdom do you live by?

The Months of the Year in My Head

2014-09-16T14:30:00.000-04:00

The above is a visual representation of how the months of the year are organized in my head. Over the years, I've tried to think of other ways to lay out the months in my mind but nothing ever sticks. This is how it is and probably how it will always be.

January through May line up together all in one neat row. Everything is orderly and neat until we get to the summer months. That's when things go astray. June is always below May but it's not directly below it. It's always slightly to the right. Sometimes it shifts way over to the right but it usually stays in that spot. June, July and August always stack up one on top of the other vertically. In my youth, those months always represented the freedom from school, warm weather, long days and fun trips. So it makes sense that if my brain were to break up the months that the summer ones would separate from all the others.

September has always been the most difficult for me to visualize. I can never think of it on it's own, only in relation to the month before, August, and the month after, October. I placed it to the left of October in the diagram above but it only exists that way when I'm thinking of September in relation to October. When I'm thinking of September during August, September is right beneath the summer months or skewed slightly to the left but still below. The first 20 days of September are technically summer and school never started right at the beginning of the month anyways so I always thought of September as an extension of summer. September is a transition month for me so it makes sense that it's a more mobile month in my head.

October, November and December follow the same pattern as the earlier months of the year, all in a neat row. Once the days of the year start winding down and we get closer to New Year's, I start building a new diagram in my head of the upcoming months. January is never right next to December. I have to jump up to the top of my diagram to get to it. I think it's interesting that although January follows December, in my mind the two are really far apart from each other.

How do you visualize the months of the year in your head? Do they follow a straight vertical or horizontal line? Do you stack them by season or by threes? Or do you have a weirder arrangement like the one I have above?

Paper Doll by the Mills Brothers

2014-09-09T12:00:00.000-04:00

Paper Dolls was the Mills Brothers comeback song. The Mills Brothers was barbershop style quartet (sometimes quintet) whose pop vocal styles had elements of jazz and swing. They found much musical success in the 1930s but an extended tour of Europe and South America kept them away from American listeners too long and when they returned they found themselves mostly forgotten. They revitalized their career in 1943 when they released their record I’ll Be Around. The song Paper Doll was on the B-Side and it went on to become their biggest hit. It was written years ago in 1915 by songwriter Johnny S. Black. The song wasn’t published until 1930 and wasn’t recorded until 1942 . When you listen to the song, you can tell it’s definitely a blend of new (the Mills Brothers style) and old (the original song as written years ago). I love this song. It reminds me of I Found a Million Dollar Baby (Harry Warren) as well as Louis Armstrong’s Dummy Song.

A big thanks goes out to Bobby Rivers who introduced me to the Mills Brothers. I have loved them ever since!

Paper Doll

I’m gonna buy a Paper Doll that I can call my own

A doll that others fellows cannot steal

And then the flirty, flirty guys with their flirty, flirty eyes,

Will have to flirt with dollies that are real.

When I come home at night she will be waiting

She’ll be the truest doll in all this world.

I’d rather have a Paper Doll that I can call my own

Than have a fickle-minded real live girl.

I guess I had a million dolls or more

I guess I played the doll game o’er and o’er.

I just quarreled with Sue, that’s why I’m blue.

She’s gone away and left me just like all dolls do.

I’ll tell you boys it’s tough to be alone.

And it’s tough to love a doll that’s not your own.

I’m through with all of them, I’ll never fall again.

Say boy, whatcha gonna do?

I’m gonna buy a Paper Doll that I can call my own

A doll that others fellows cannot steal

And then the flirty, flirty guys, with their flirty, flirty eyes

Will have to flirt with dollies that are real.

When I come home at night, she will be waiting.

She’ll be the truest doll in all this world.

I’d rather have a Paper Doll that I can call my own,

Than have a fickle-minded real live girl.

The Mills Brothers

A to Z of Me

2014-09-06T09:00:00.000-04:00

Age: 33, my Jesus Year.

Bed size: Queen. I can’t wait to upgrade to a King!

Chore that you hate: It’s not a particular chore but I do hate cleaning up after people. It’s the worst chore of all having to clean up after someone who can’t or won’t clean up after themselves.

Dogs: I used to have a beagle. I miss him so.

Essential start to your day: Breakfast. But if I’m honest, scanning Instagram is the first thing I do when I wake up.

Favorite color: Blue and Green

Gold or Silver: Silver

Height: 5’ 8” and proud of it.

Instruments you play: I used to play violin in an orchestra in elementary and junior high school. I also played clarinet for a while.

Job title: Online Marketing Manager, Blogger Extraordinaire

Kids: None

Live: New England

Mother’s name: Sarah (she named after Abraham's wife in the Bible)

Nicknames: Quelle

Overnight hospital stays: None. So far I’ve only had day procedures/surgeries. Thank goodness!

Pet peeves: Throat clearing during a movie. SHHHH.

Quote from a movie: “What ever anything is, it ought to begin by being personal.” – You’ve Got Mail (1998)

Right or left handed: Right handed

Siblings: Two half-sisters in Canada but I was basically raised an only child.

Time it takes you to get ready: It takes me 30 minutes to get out of bed and an hour to get ready. I have to add 45 minutes if I need to wash and dry my hair.

Ultimate Vacation: A trip across Europe.

Vegetable you hate: I love all vegetables but I’ll pass on cooked red onions, blech.

What makes you run late: Playing on my phone way too long before getting up out of bed!

X-Rays you’ve had: I’ve had several including a barium swallow. Fun times.

Yummy food that you make: Go to my food blog Thoughtful Eating to see them all!

Zoo animal: WOLVES. They are not a typical zoo animal but I love them. I also get extra excited if I see a Capybara at a zoo. It happened one time.

Scarf-Purse Trick

2014-09-04T12:00:00.000-04:00

Do you have a purse that doesn’t zip close? Or perhaps you’re like me and prefer to keep your purse open even when closing it is an option. The problem with having an open purse is that other people can take a peek inside. There is a reason why the “What’s In My Purse” meme is so popular. People are curious about what others carry around with them. Also, keeping an open purse makes you more vulnerable to being robbed. It would be easy for someone to spy a wallet or some other item of value and quickly lift it out of your purse.

My solution for the open purse problem is to fill the empty space at the top with a scarf. What’s great about this is the fabric fills the purse nicely and effectively obscures the items below. Also, you can match a scarf to your purse adding some extra flare to your outfit. An added bonus: you have a scarf ready to go in case you want to add it to an outfit or need to protect your hair from wind or rain. If I leave my purse in a car, I will sometimes use the scarf to cover the purse obscuring it from those nosy folks who like to look into car windows.

10 Facts About Me Meme

2014-09-01T15:30:00.000-04:00

10 Facts About Me

Your Nickname - Quelle. No one calls me this in real life but I like to refer to myself like that online.
Your Eye Color - Boring Brown. My long, thick lashes make up for it though.
Your Hair Color - Boring Brown. I refuse to call it dark brown!
One fact about you - I love all things history. All of my hobbies and interests all seem to come back to one major theme: history. I'm a history nerd for life!
Favorite Color - It's a tie between blue and green. What's more glorious than looking up and seeing the green of the leaves at the top of a tree matched with the blue of the sky? That combo is what makes nature so beautiful.
Favorite Place - Jasper, Alberta, Canada. No other place has filled me with as much joy as that place did.
Favorite Celebrity - Robert Mitchum. He's one of the most interesting and difficult people of film history. And gosh darn it was he handsome!
Favorite Animal - Wolves
Favorite Song - Look For the Silver Lining by Chet Baker. His voice is so smooth and I love that it's an upbeat jazz number. Most jazz tunes are about heartbreak and sadness. I love that this one is optimistic.
Favorite Book - Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen. I want to be Elizabeth Bennett and I fell in love with Mr. Darcy. A close second is a new-to-me favorite North and South by Elizabeth Gaskell. It's Pride and Prejudice meets social justice.

On Masterpiece Mystery! Breathless

2014-08-31T16:59:00.002-04:00

I caught the first episode of the new British TV drama Breathless on Masterpiece Mystery! last night. I had seen the previews for it over and over again but I wasn't quite sure if I wanted to see it. I'm glad I did because it filled two desires I had for a replacement for the soon-to-be-ending Mad Men and a new British show that I could follow from the very beginning.

Breathless is basically Mad Men meets London. Instead of the ad men and women of Madison Avenue we get the doctors and nurses (and their patients and families) of a gynecological ward in a London hospital. Because they work in gynecology, sex inevitably becomes the main theme of the story. There are unhappy marriages, adultery, unwanted pregnancies, miscarriages and all sorts of issues that result from relationships and sex.

It's very easy to compare Breathless with Mad Men because a lot of the characters are so similar. The show stars Jack Davenport as the surgeon Otto Powell. He's the show's equivalent to Don Draper. He's charismatic, good at his job and admired by some and hated by others. His rival, up-and-coming surgeon Richard Truscott (Oliver Chris), is the epitome of Peter Campbell. He's privileged, sexist and lacks originality or talent. The new nurse Angela Wilson (Catherine Steadman) is the show's answer to Peggy Olson. And it couldn't be more obvious that Angela's sister and Richard's bride Jean (Zoe Boyle) is modeled after Mad Men's Joan, right down to the red hair, her sexy strut and her form fitting dresses.

Yes there are comparisons galore between Breathless and Mad Men but I think the main difference between the two will be how the main character Otto develops as a character. I think he won't be quite the anti-hero Don Draper was but we'll see. In the first episode we see that Otto has a big secret from his past, much like Draper had, and I'm wondering how the writers will work that into the plot of upcoming episodes.

The first episode started off a bit cheesy. It felt like the creators were trying to hard. But it got better as the show progressed and eventually I was hooked. I'm curious to see how Otto's relationship with nurse Angela develops. I love the themes of sex, relationships, class, intrigue and ethics come into play. The fashion and decor doesn't hurt either! The show is rather progressive and depicts the sexual revolution of the 1960s. If you shy away from stories which feature abortion or birth control pills, then this show isn't for you. And Mad Men wouldn't have been for you anyways.

The second episode is on tonight and I'm excited to watch it!

Stop and smell the Lilacs

2014-05-19T10:00:00.000-04:00

In the dooryard fronting an old farm-house near the white-wash’d palings,

Stands the lilac-bush tall-growing with heart-shaped leaves of rich green,

With many a pointed blossom rising delicate, with the perfume strong I love,

With every leaf a miracle—and from this bush in the dooryard,

With delicate-color’d blossoms and heart-shaped leaves of rich green,

A sprig with its flower I break. - Walt Whitman

No matter how hectic your life gets, make sure you stop to enjoy the simple things in life. Spring always brings me a crazy schedule, full of moments when I want to break down and retreat from the world. During this time I make sure enjoy nature which is at its full glory. Nature reminds me of the importance of simplicity. Connecting with all the vibrant life blossoming all around is essential. I take a moment to stop and smell the lilacs, to soak in some sunlight, to go for a long walk outside, to wonder at the glory of the greenery that surrounds us and to watch a Robin hop along the grass looking for it's next treat. Don't ever let life disconnect you from nature. Always find a way back to it.

Beyonce Lipsyncs and I fake the National Anthem

2013-01-22T16:30:00.000-05:00

(Picture from Jezebel/Gawker)

It came out today on various news sources (Huffington Post, Jezebel,Times of London, Washingtonian and more) that singer Beyonce lipsynced the our country's national anthem, The Star-Spangled Banner, at the 2013 Inauguration of President Obama. Now I don't know much about lipsyncing but I feel betrayed. I assumed the whole thing was real. I loved her performance so much that I watched the above YouTube clip several times and was moved to tears at each viewing.

Yesterday was a triumphant day for minorities. A black president's second term, Sonia Sotomayor became the first Latina to perform an oath of office, Richard Blanco, a gay Cuban-American poet, was one of the few poets ever to read a poem during a presidential inauguration, Rev. Luis Leon delivered the benediction and Beyonce sang the national anthem. I think this was one of the best inaugurations I ever witnessed (albeit from television).

Why did Beyonce lipsync? I've read several things. That it could be because of cold weather. That all performances are pre-recorded in case something happens. I also read that only once before, due to cold and wind, did musicians have to use pre-recorded music but other than that all performances are live. What gives Beyonce? We all loved your performance, how you tackled a difficult song with elegance, grace and talent but in the end you just pulled the wool over our eyes with your lipsyncing.

I know Beyonce is a talented singer and that she could have performed this live. While some people might think I'm over-reacting, I still feel betrayed. If she has the talent and the capabilities to sing this live, why wasn't it done? Why?

Then I started thinking of my one public performance of the national anthem. I'm a terrible singer now but I was a pretty decent when I was in elementary school. I was labeled something: Contralto? Alto? I'm not sure. But I was on the lower range.

In elementary school, during my fifth grade year, I signed up for chorus. I wasn't able to attend all the rehearsals and I missed a key one for practicing the national anthem. That rehearsal was for an upcoming performance in front of the school. I didn't get sheet music like I did for the other songs. I'm pretty sure the chorus teacher just expected us all to know the anthem by heart. I remember the recital. We were on standing bleachers and I chose the top left corner. BIG MISTAKE. A photographer from the local newspaper, The Milford Daily, was about to take pictures of us singing the National Anthem. The flag was hanging to my right and we all put our hands to our hearts and turned to face it. Because of this positioning, I was the closest to the flag so everyone's eyes and the photographer's lens were aimed straight at me.

My dilemma wasn't being shy, it was that I didn't know the words to the Star-Spangled Banner. I vaguely knew the beginning and I knew the last two lines but that was it. I was in big trouble.

It's partly my fault for missing the key rehearsal and not telling the teacher that I didn't know the lyrics ahead of time. In my defense, I was raised to be politically neutral and not patriotic. I, for the most part, sat out of the daily recital of Pledge of Allegiance. It was a religious thing encouraged by my mother. It wasn't a huge deal if I did recite the pledge because my mother wasn't very strict. Also, sometimes I faked it so the other kids wouldn't ask questions or think to make fun of me.

So there I was. A young girl, patriotically neutral, ignorant of the lyrics of the Star-Spangled Banner and with all eyes and one camera lens focused on me. I faked the anthem as best I could. I tried to mouth the words. My saving grace was that the photographer chose to take my picture at the moment when we all sang "home of the brave." I knew those words! I knew them. So I sang them confidently.

The picture that ran in the paper was of me and a couple of other students with our mouths wide open belting out that last word "brave". Or at least that's what it looked like. Phew!

I was just a little kid who tried to make the best of the situation. At least I didn't stand there and pick my nose or something. At least I had the sense to fake it so that I wouldn't look stupid. But I'm not a trained singer, a professional who was hired to perform publicly in front of millions of people. Thank goodness!

In the end, I'm not sure what to take away from the Beyonce situation. Should I forgive her because of my own personal experience, albeit a very minor one in comparison, or should I hold her accountable because she could have delivered but chose not to?

Here are the lyrics of The Star-Spangled Banner. Maybe I'll finally learn them one day:

O say can you see by the dawn's early light,

What so proudly we hailed at the twilight's last gleaming,

Whose broad stripes and bright stars through the perilous fight,

O'er the ramparts we watched, were so gallantly streaming?

And the rockets' red glare, the bombs bursting in air,

Gave proof through the night that our flag was still there;

O say does that star-spangled banner yet wave,

O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave?

Quelle Quirks ~ Interest #1 Wolves

2012-04-26T12:00:00.000-04:00

I have way too many interests. So many in fact that there are not enough hours in the days, weeks, months and years to devote sufficient time to each of them. Most folks know that I'm a classic film nut, that I love to cook and bake and I'm often found with nose stuck in a good book. But those are only my biggest passions. There are lots and lots of other things that fascinate me. And I mean lots.

I thought I'd share some of my quirky interests in a new series on this blog called Quelle Quirks. This is heavily inspired by fellow blogger Bev's Weird Admissions series in which she confessions different personality quirks. Her blog is private but you can check out her wonderful Etsy shop La Paperie & Cozy which is filled with excellent Handmade Leather Journals.

Wolves

Source

I simply adore wolves.They are by far my favorite animal. When I was a teenager, I didn't have posters of rock or film stars on my wall. My walls were covered in posters and artwork of wild animals, especially wolves. I had wolf posters, plush wolves, wolf t-shirts, wolf figurines, books on wolves, I even made a leather key-chain in school with a wolf pattern on it. At one point in my teen years, I had "adopted" a wolf and went to a captive wolf sanctuary in my state. My dream had always been to study wolves in the wild, but alas that was not meant to be. I had hoped desperately that when I went to Alberta to visit my aunt and uncle that I would see a wild wolf when we visited Jasper and Banff, two towns situated in the Rocky Mountains. I saw lots of wild animals on my trip there but no wolves.

Last night I saw a documentary on PBS called Radioactive Wolves. It was about the thriving wolf population (and wildlife population in general) in the abandoned Chernobyl Zone of the Ukraine and Belarus. You can watch one of the chapters of the documentary below or watch the whole thing on the PBS website. Seeing the documentary reminded me how much I loved this beautiful and often misunderstood animal.

Watch Radioactive Wolves on PBS. See more from Nature.

My Not-So-Extravagant Wedding

2011-10-25T17:30:00.001-04:00

My wedding is next year and while it's still several months away I am in full planning mode. One of the first things we did when Carlos and I got engaged was have an engagement photo shoot. The photographer iss a friend of his and she gave us a great deal. The pictures came out wonderful! I had signed up for David's Bridal's website and got a coupon for a free Photo Book from Shutterfly. I turned those engagement photos and iPhone pictures from the proposal into a Photo Book. It came out so well I got one for my parents. My mom loved it so much that she took it to work and showed all her co-workers. And then the problem began.

Her co-workers saw the fancy pictures in a printed hardcover book and immediately assumed that we shelled out a lot of money for it. They didn't know that we had gotten a discount from the photographer friend and that although I paid for the second Photo Book, I used two coupon codes which gave me free shipping and a 10% discount. All of a sudden all of my mom's co-workers are being super nice to her. Especially ones who had either ignored her or been rude to her in the past. She even got Employee of the Quarter which she hadn't received in almost 17 years (she's been at the company well over 20 years). Everyone wants to be invited to my wedding. The wedding they assume will be an extravagant and expensive affair. Not only that, my mother has been throwing out a random dollar amount for the whole wedding budget. Thanks Mom! Thanks for telling people how much you think my wedding will cost (FYI - I have not given her any numbers).

My wedding will not be extravagant. These are the 10 ways I'm pinching pennies.

1) No Bridesmaids, No Groomsmen, No Wedding Party - It's not traditional in Spanish-speaking countries to have these anyways. Also saves me money on having to give gifts, get flowers for the party, provide them with transportation, etc.
2) No flowers with a few exceptions - There will be no flowers with the exceptions of two bridal bouquets (one for me to hold and one for me to throw) and a few boutonnieres. And I'll be making the bouquets and boutonnieres myself to save money.
3) Ceremony and Reception are at the same place - I'm not having a church wedding. Both the ceremony and reception will be at the same location. We won't have to worry about paying for transportation to get people from one location to another or to pay two rental fees. Also, the location I chose is owned by my Alma Mater and I got an Alumni discount. Food/Catering is included in the price and they don't charge us a ceremony fee like other places do.
4) No Limousine - If the ceremony & reception are in the same place and I have no wedding party, why would I need it? It's a gross waste of money in my opinion.
5) No Rehearsal Dinner - Why would we need one if we have no wedding party?
6) No Engagement Party, Bridal Shower or Jack and Jill Party - I think our money was better spent on Engagement photos than a party. The wedding is the big party anyways. Also, while the Bridal Shower/Jack and Jill Parties would be organized by someone else and would be an opportunity for us to get presents, I think it's best to skip them to lessen the stress overall of wedding planning.
7) Hair and Makeup - I'm not 100% sure about this but I might be doing my own hair and makeup. It's expensive and if I pick a hair and makeup style early and practice it in advance of the wedding date, I can master it in time for the big day. However, two people have offered to gift me Hair & Makeup so I'm still deciding.
8) Decorations - No lights, no special tablecloths or napkins, no ice sculptures, etc. We may have some non-floral DIY & themed centerpieces but I'm not sure yet.
9) Dress and Accessories - Probably not going to have a veil. My ideal dress would be light enough to move and dance in. It will not be expensive because I'm only going to wear this once. Why would I want to break the bank buying it? I'm seriously considering ordering a handmade custom dress on Etsy however I just found out that my fiancee gets a 25% corporate discount at a well-known Bridal boutique chain.
10) Free help! - I have a wedding coordinator who is not charging us but is helping us out in return for experience. I'll be asking a few people to help out on the day (minor stuff). And I use TheKnot.com for free wedding help and their organizational tools and Twitter for advice.

Things that are important for me to invest in include: save-the-date magnets, invitations, wedding cake, DJ, photographer, videographer, wedding favors, disposable cameras, honeymoon, travel for the ceremony officiant, wedding bands, marriage license, bachelorette party, etc.

So why am I being so cheap? I want a house desperately. And I also really want a honeymoon. I haven't traveled any significant distance for a proper vacation since 2003. I'm long overdue. I'd rather save money and keep costs down so I can have what I really want but still have a nice wedding.

Bleach Makes Everything Bad Go Away

2011-09-30T13:00:00.020-04:00

Bleach is so wonderful. It's the best cleaning product out there, bar none. My mom taught me so many ways to use bleach and it has been an essential weapon during my trials and tribulations of living at chez Carlos.

Before I moved into Carlos' condo, Carlos would never use a liner in his trash cans. This ongoing practice resulted in nasty trash buckets lined with a sludge that resulted from the decay of food material and other waste. Blech. There was no way I was going I was diving into his 13 gallon plastic kitchen trash can to clean it. No matter how many pieces of paper towel and how many bottles of all-purpose cleaner I had. No way. NO. JUST NO!

So what did I do? I took the empty (emphasis on empty) trash can and stood it in the bathtub. I then poured some bleach into it, just enough to cover the worst of the sludge, and let it sit there for about 15 minutes.Then I turned on the shower and let really hot water fill the trashcan. I made sure to open all the windows of the condo, including the bathroom one, because steam that results hot water and bleach is not something you want to be breathing in. In fact, I even went outside for a few minutes while the shower water was filling up the can just to get away from the fumes. Once it the trash can was full, I shut off the shower head and let the trash can sit there for a few hours while the hot water and bleach worked it's magic. I dumped the bleach water and got a sparkling clean trash can in return. No scrubbing, no spraying, no nothing. Thank you bleach!

Warning: Be careful when using bleach! Wash your hands thoroughly afterwards and be careful not to get any on your clothes. If need be, strip yourself of all clothing and wrap yourself in a large white towel or wear a white bathrobe.

Another way I use bleach is to unclog the bathroom sink and tub when it gets to filled with hair and other waste. Somewhat recently both the bathroom sink and tub were clogged and would fill up quickly and drain way too slowly. I don't know about you but I loathe standing water. It's a magnet for bacteria, bugs and the dreaded MOLD! I have little to no patience with standing water. What I used to do to treat clogs was add a couple glugs (yes that's a technical term I use) of bleach to help the water drain. It did help the drain go by faster but it didn't help the clog and the problem would continue. One day, completely by accident, I discovered the solution. After forgetting to help the sink drain with some bleach I went back and found the water had all drained. I looked inside the drain and saw hair, floss, string and other gunk inside. I poured enough bleach into the sink to create a pool reminiscent of what was leftover after I washed my hands. The bleach got to work and the drain burped a few times and the liquid went down. Ever since then, water drains quickly in the sink. I did the same for the tub and after a few belches it's been draining efficiently.

So why didn't I just buy some Draino? It doesn't work! I don't care how much research they've done and how it's advanced over the years. Draino, and similar products, are more money than their worth. After an incident with a tub clog back in my old apartment, I went through about 4 bottles of Draino only to have the tub still filled with standing water for hours upon hours after every shower. I called my mom in distress and her answer to me was Bleach and lots of it. I bought a small bottle of bleach (much cheaper than either of the 4 bottles of Draino I had purchased) and poured the whole thing in. The problem went away just like that!

So when in doubt, bleach! Bleach makes bad things go away. (Warning: Does not work on annoying people, only on annoying household grime and clogs and your laundry whites).

The War Against Mold and Mildew

2011-09-28T13:00:00.001-04:00

I'll save you the distress of having to look at a picture of mold or mildew. You'll thank me later.

Mold and mildew. Oh how I hate you so. Before I moved in, Carlos' condo was a total mess. Standing water in the tub, a moth infestation, some light levels of hoarding, dust, hair and mold and mildew. And that's just a general overview! There were a lot more problems but those were the major ones. Carlos has asthma so how he lived in those conditions and survived is beyond my level of understanding.

I got rid of the moths by cleaning the kitchen and removing all of their egg deposits. I made sure that nothing dry (flour, rice, etc.) was exposed. Everything was in clean sealed bags or containers. I placed dry bay leaves in various cupboards to scare them away. The moths disappeared and haven't come back.Carlos had someone fix the drain in the bathtub and there was no more standing water. All the rooms were cleaned of hair, dust and clutter. It seemed like everything bad was fixed. But the mold and mildew still plague me to this day.

The problem with the condo is that it has poor air circulation, is in a shady corner of the complex so there isn't enough sunlight coming in and it is at ground level (mostly above ground). Because we are at ground level, it's not feasible to keep the windows open when we are not at home. It would be way too easy for a burglar to find his or her way in and make off with our valuable goods. So for most of the day the windows are closed.

Mold grows the most in the bathroom. Whoever tiled, caulked and painted the bathroom neglected to use anti-mold materials. You can buy anti-mold caulking and paint at any local hardware store. No one informed this person of that valuable fact. The shower is completely tiled and there is a window with a sill that's about a foot deep. The tile, including that flat surface of the sill which collects pools of water, is a magnet for black mold. Oh and how it loves to grow on that. The ceiling paint also has black mold. I have spent countless hours in that bathroom cleaning with hot water, bleach and mold remover. Alas, the mold always comes back with a vengeance sticking to anything it can.

So I developed a full battle plan against the mold (and the pink mildew which grows there too):

1. Open the window after every shower. Even if it's only for an hour or two. This daily practice helps bring in fresh air that will dry the tiles, tub, shower curtain and mat. Mold loves moist environments so the drier I can get the bathroom the better. There are no electrical outlets in our bathroom so a fan (my ideal solution for this problem) is not an option.

2. I invested in a anti-mold/anti-mildew bath mat. I've gone through a couple mats. The first one was a mold magnet and went from clear plastic to almost black. I threw that out. Then I got an anti-mold/anti-mildew bath mat which never collected mold but never dried. EVER! It was always cold, wet and squishy. Finally, I got a white rubber mat which was also anti-mold/anti-mildew. After every shower, we hang it up on the towel rod which is in the shower itself. Bad placement for towels, great for mats. The mat, suspended all day, dries thoroughly.

3. I also invested in an anti-mold/anti-mildew shower curtain liner. Pink mildew was a big problem on the last shower curtain I had. It would grow rampantly and I'd shiver at the thought of the curtain liner touching me. Ick! I switched to the new liner which works for the most part. However, if you scrunch the liner, the space in between the folds won't dry thorough and the pink mildew will grow. So we had to make a regular ritual of spreading open the curtain.

4. Weekly treatment of shower with an Anti-Mold/Mildew spray. Why don't I just do this every day? The spray has a heavy chemical smell and doesn't work on heavy mold growth. With steps 1-3, I keep the mold growth down and the Anti-Mold/Mildew helps remove what's left behind. It's also really good at getting that pink mildew off the curtain. I do this every Sunday and make sure the window is wide open to let some good air in.

Extra tip: I wash all used towels once a week with hot water and detergent and I dry them at the highest heat. After each use, they are spread out to dry on our new towel rack. Folding wet towels and not washing/drying them frequently enough will just be inviting more mold to grow.

I miss the days of having a super clean, always dry, mold-less bathroom. I lived on the 3rd floor of an apartment building and always kept the bathroom window open with no fear of a break in. Glorious! A dry bathroom is a happy one.

A Heavy Load Indeed

2011-09-26T13:00:00.020-04:00

Carlos is almost one month in to his current semester and already he is feeling overwhelmed. He takes two classes at a community college and works upwards of 60 hours per week. Next week he'll be clocking in at 6 days instead of his average 5. I feel bad for him because he comes home exhausted from being on his feet all day, he can't take some time out during his day to study and he goes to bed really late after studying all night.

I remember the work-school dilemma very well. Back in 2005, I started a graduate program in Writing, Literature and Publishing at a local college. I was working full time and attending classes at night. Each class met once a week for 4 hours. By the time I got home, my mind would be buzzing from the days' activity and brand new information. I had to start taking melatonin supplements so I could go to sleep. I didn't work 60 hours but I did work a regular 9-5 Monday-Friday schedule with significant commuting time. It was a lot to handle. See that picture on the left? That was my first semesters reading load. The only book I didn't have to read cover-to-cover was that fat Chicago Manual of Style towards the bottom of the stack.

How did I manage to survive graduate school? I'm still not 100% sure. During that time I was in a car accident, developed an ulcer from all the coffee I drank and gained a few other health problems because of all the stress. I fit in homework where I could. I did a lot of writing during my lunch breaks. I read whenever and wherever I could: on the T, in bed, at the library and even on the toilet. I made it out of school with all As, a diploma, a gaggle of new friends and regret. I don't think I really needed a graduate degree. It didn't do much for me career-wise but it is another notch on the belt of life. No one can say I'm just some typical underprivileged Latina with too-tight pants and too many pregnancies. I have a Master's!

So what's the solution for Carlos? I think his free time is very precious and he needs to manage it well in order to make it through the semester. Time management is tres difficile. I was never good at it. Fear of failure kept me in check. I hope Carlos can find something that works for him and I know I'm willing to help.

September 11th, 2011

2011-09-11T09:59:00.001-04:00

This is a picture that I took back in 1991. I was 10 years old and my mom and I were in New York visiting family friends. Not sure which tower this was but I remember taking pictures of all the major New York sites while we past.

Do you remember where you were September 11th, 2001? I remember driving at night on the highway on September 10th, 2001 and I was listening to the radio. It might have been NPR or some other news radio and the correspondent talking mentioned Osama Bin Laden. He claimed that George W. Bush had no interest in finding him. Then the next day, I woke up, had my breakfast and watched as my dad took my dog out for his morning walk. I was going to start my first semester at Northeastern University in just over a week so I was enjoying my last days of summer. I logged onto America Online and I saw an incredible image in the welcome screen. It was of the two towers with smoke billowing out of them.

I told my dad, I called my mom who was at work and I watched the TV in horror. I remember watching one of the news shows and they were talking to someone at the Pentagon. I heard a big boom. It was the plane that hit the building. I couldn't believe what was happening. I was speechless as I watched both towers fall. It seemed unreal. Totally unreal.

You couldn't escape 9/11 even after the day had passed. I have been scared of flying ever since. This coming from someone who had been flying since she was 20 days old. Even almost crashing into the Atlantic Ocean during a flight at the age of 8 (we ended up safely landing in the Azores) didn't scar me like watching the events of 9/11. It didn't help my fear of heights too.

Let us never forget what happened that day. I know I won't.

Young Me #3

2011-09-10T09:55:00.000-04:00

Before I met my Carlos, I was very close with another Carlos. A young Columbian boy from my apartment complex in Natick. We didn't always get along. He was kind of a brat and if I'm honest, I was one too. Here Carlos and I are having fun at his birthday party and in an inflatable pool.

Posh Frock Friday - Cheer Me Up Edition

2011-09-09T09:28:00.001-04:00

Posh Frock Friday is a sort-of-meme run by Kate of Scathingly Brilliant.

I've been a bit down lately. Finances, future goals, health issues, wedding planning all seem to weigh me down emotionally. One of the ways I've been cheering myself up is by wearing posh frocks and experimenting with hairdos.

In our present culture very few people do hairdos anymore. It's all about the haircut. You go to a hair salon, invest in a good haircut and it's like having a permanent hairdo on your head at all times. I can't do haircuts. Nothing really works on me. Bangs don't work at any length because my hair is naturally very curly and frizzy. I have three types of hair (European, African and Arabic). It doesn't want to lay flat ever, especially on my forehead. I can't do any haircuts that require the hair to be super straight to look good. I can't do layers because it'll look like I'm wearing a mullet. Stylish haircuts are just not for me. However, I can do stylish hairdos. My hair loves to be braided, twisted, pinned and styled. Hairdos break up the roundness of my head and face and give some structure to my look. Plus they are fun to do. I used to do french braids on my friends in high school all the time. On one friend I even did a french braid that looked like a big question mark with a scrunchie at the end that served as a dot. Looking back at pictures of my mother when she was my age, she always had impeccable hairdos. She had at one time been a professional hair dresser and passed down her natural talent to me. So now, I'm cheering myself up with some hairdos!

Not sure if you can see but this is a traditional rope that wraps around the head. The secret to this rope is to work it like a french braid AND to make sure you twist the two strands of hair in one direction but twist them together in another. The tension between the two alternate twists is what holds the twist together. Also, alternating makes it look like a rope.

Skirt - Lord & Taylor

Top - Lord & Taylor

Cardigan - H&M

Earrings - Forever 21

If you want to learn how to do this hairdo, watch Lilith Moon's tutorial. She doesn't mention the alternating twisting style in this one so make note of it. Otherwise it won't look right on your head.

Old Polaroids #1

2011-09-06T21:45:00.000-04:00

I'm almost done with my family photo scanning project. It was a lot of fun going down memory lane. Some of my favorites have to be these wonderful old Polaroids, most of them taken in Santo Domingo, Dominican Republic and Natick, Massachusetts. Enjoy!

Never tape pictures! Never ever put tape on pictures! EVER!

Boston Harbor Fest

2011-07-02T10:26:00.000-04:00

Carlos and I spent Thursday in Boston attending some of the Boston Harbor Fest events. It was a lot of fun (and walking). Here are some pictures from that day.

Carlos walking the Freedom Trail towards the State House.

Inside the State House.

The hanging thingamabob represents Massachusetts. All the flags represent each town of the state.

Underneath the famous dome of the State House.

JFK Memorial Statue

View of the Boston Skyline from the Boston Common

Flowers at the Boston Public Garden

One of the famous Swan Boats at the Boston Public Garden

Self Portrait

Gorgeous flowers

Washington Statue at the Boston Public Garden

New England Aquarium

A Harbor Seal at the New England Aquarium

We took a Boston Rickshaw up the hill from the New England Aquarium to King's Chapel. This really worked hard to get us there.

View from the Rickshaw

Inside King's Chapel.

On the Crypt tour of the King's Chapel, Carlos gets a peek into one of the crypts.

And you can see a lot. Including the actual coffins. Including this one of an unidentified baby. ::shivers::

Cemetery outside King's Chapel.

U.S.S. Consitution

Second Anniversary

2011-06-28T16:48:00.000-04:00

Carlos and I celebrated our second anniversary by recreating our first two dates. We dined at the same restaurant we first met at and we saw Hangover II (Hangover was what we saw on our real second date!). We had a little fun with pictures too.