Ask Dan and Jennifer

Fingers vs. Sex Toys – Which Is Better? (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Mon, 01 Aug 2011 14:00:46 +0000

Female masturbation can be done with almost anything – hands, sex toys or even a shower head. All women are different and prefer their own style of masturbation – no two women will ever do it exactly the same. But which is better – a vibrator or your hands?

Pros Of Fingering

While some women just enjoy the buzz that a good vibrator can give them, there are certain things that fingers can do that sex toys can’t. While sex toys offer stronger, faster and harder orgasms than hands can give you in most cases, there are definitely some benefits to “clicking your own mouse” the old fashioned way.

They’re Readily Available Whenever You Want Them

Your hands are attached to you, so if you want to masturbate in the bathroom on a plane or even in your car while stuck in traffic, you can without having to bring any extra tools with you.

Easy To Clean

No special cleansers required here – all it takes to get your hands clean before and after female masturbation is to wash them with good old old fashioned soap and water. In fact, if you’re doing it in the bathroom, you can wash your hands as you come out with no one being the wiser! If you’re not in a place where washing your hands is an option, a good dollop of hand sanitizer will do in a pinch.

Easier To Hide What You’re Doing If You Get Caught Masturbating

If you get caught going for the gold with a huge dildo, it’s going to be pretty difficult to try to hide what you’re doing or explain yourself – unless you want to just come out there and admit you’ve been getting it on with yourself. If you’re fingering yourself and you get caught, it is much, much easier to hide it or pretend that you weren’t masturbating. Not like getting caught with a sex toy!

A Man Is Less Intimidated By Fingers If He’s Intimidated By Sex Toys

If you’re with a guy who has a vendetta against sex toys (and some of them do), he’s going to be less intimidated if he knows you masturbate with your hands instead of a vibrator. While there’s nothing wrong with masturbating either way, some men just feel like they can’t compete with something that runs off of batteries.

Cons Of Using Your Fingers

While there are many benefits to using your hands during female masturbation, there are definitely some cons as well. Ignoring the downfalls of using your hands to get yourself off boils down to the personal preference of each woman.

They May Be Too Short To Reach Your G-Spot

If you have very short arms, hands or fingers, they may not reach your g-spot. While this is fine for women who enjoy fingering their clitoris during female masturbation, women who really enjoy intense g-spot orgasms are going to be disappointed.

It May Take Longer To Reach Orgasm

Vibrators allow women to achieve orgasms faster than ever before, and often the climax is much more intense. Not so with fingers – while you can reach orgasm and it can be just as good, it may take a lot longer to push yourself over the edge. This is especially true if you’re used to masturbating with a vibrator and switch to doing it with your hands.

It May Be Very Uncomfortable To Bend Your Arm And Wrist Enough To Reach Your G-Spot

The angle required to reach the g-spot properly is intense – reaching your own hand down there and angling your fingers in the right way may be uncomfortable or painful. You may be able to do it for a short period of time, but coupled with the movement of your fingers to stimulate your g-spot, you may not be able to keep it up for very long.

Bacteria From Under Your Nails Can Cause Infections

If you’re not good about washing your hands before you masturbate, bacteria under your nails can be introduced into your vagina and cause bacterial or yeast infections. This is why proper hygiene is so important!

Long Nails Can Scratch And Cut

Many women enjoy having long nails or wear acrylic nails. If you do, your long nails can scratch or cut the inside of your vagina. Ouch! If you prefer to masturbate with your hands, try to keep your nails trimmed or file the edges so they are not sharp.

Pros Of Using Sex Toys For Female Masturbation

While many of the benefits of using sex toys during female masturbation are obvious – vibrations, hello? – there are also a number of other benefits of choosing a toy instead of your hands when getting busy by yourself.

Many Sex Toys Are Made Specifically For G-Spot Stimulation

While fingering will do the job most of the time, many sex toys are created specifically for g-spot stimulation. This means that they’re much better at reaching the right spot than you are, and can often provide stronger and faster stimulation.

Some Of Them Vibrate

Sex toys can vibrate. Enough said!

Sex Toys Don’t Get Cramped Up During Use

While ignoring pain or discomfort in your hands is easier to do when you’re almost there, you don’t have to do that with a sex toy. They never get tired or cramped up during use – if your hands get cramped up right before you reach orgasm and you’re unable to finish, it’s all over and you’re going to be an unhappy camper for the rest of the day!

They Come In Different Sizes, Shapes And Materials

Women like different things during female masturbation, and there are as many different kinds of sex toys out there as there are women (almost). They come in a variety of different sizes and shapes, so each woman can find the one she likes best and is most comfortable with.

Most Sex Toys Will Provide More Than One Kind Of Stimulation At A Time

Yes, you can stimulate your clitoris and your g-spot at the same time with your hands, but do you have a third appendage for your anus as well? Also, can you vibrate your clitoris, rub your g-spot, stimulate your anus and just inside your vaginal canal with rotating beads all at the same time? Nope! But a sex toy can. Sex toys are an excellent way to achieve a blended orgasm!

Cons Of Sex Toys

While a vibrator may be the holy grail of female masturbation for many women, believe it or not there are some downfalls to using a sex toy when you’re pleasuring yourself.

They’re More Conspicuous And Harder To Hide

If you get caught fingering yourself, it’s super easy to yank your hands out of your pants and pretend you really weren’t doing anything at all – and you may very well get away with it. Getting caught with a sex toy? Not so much. They’re harder to hide (especially if yours is a vibrating rabbit or a large dildo) and can be very loud if they vibrate. Many of them can’t be taken with you places and can’t be explained away if you get caught using them.

If you want a vibrator that is quiet and easy to tuck away, try smaller, portable ones that don’t require batteries. These tend to be quieter and can easily be stashed in your pocket or purse.

Toys Do Wear Out

Eventually, even your most loved sex toy will bite the dust. It may last you years if it’s produced by a trusted manufacturer and made with quality materials, but eventually, you’ll have to say goodbye to it. Your hands are with you forever.

Many Need Batteries Replaced Or Recharging

Sex toys that require batteries or recharging can be inconvenient. Rechargeable vibrators are less inconvenient than battery operated ones (it’s a pain to continually have to buy batteries every time you’re at the store), but if you’ve ever had a vibrator die on you when you’re thisclose to climax, you may swear by your hands from then on.

Some Of Them Aren’t As Easy To Clean

Some sex toys have lots of crevices and crannies that can get bodily fluids stuck in them – and require intense cleaning if you don’t want your toy to get funky. In some cases, they require special cleaners and can’t be cleaned with traditional soap and water. Other toys aren’t waterproof, so they can’t be wiped down. Nothing can be cleaner than your hands after a good old fashioned wash!

Extreme Bondage – 7 Tools That Advanced Players Should Have On Hand

Kaylen Jackson — Sun, 31 Jul 2011 14:00:47 +0000

Extreme bondage can be fun if you’re really into hardcore sex and kink. For serious fans of kink, chintzy blindfolds and Velcro cuffs just aren’t going to give you the same thrill as something with leather and metal. If you dig the BDSM scene, here are seven must haves for your sultry lair.

A Whip Or Wooden Paddle

Submissive personalities enjoy receiving pain, while dominant personalities enjoy giving it. While couples who dabble in light bondage play rarely go farther than a feather tickler or a light smack on the rear with their hands. However, men and women who enjoy extreme bondage need something with a little more “kick.”

A whip or wooden paddle is a excellent item to have on hand if for more intense pain. A padded paddle will be softer against the skin and is less likely to leave a deep red mark or bruising, while a wooden paddle can easily break the blood vessels in the skin when used for spanking.

Japanese Silk Rope

Restraint is the core of extreme bondage, and serious BDSM fans will have no shortage of cuffs or ties around. However, Japanese silk rope is one of the best forms of restraint around. It is smoother against the skin than traditional rope, and allows people to get into some incredibly artistic positions. While beginners can use Japanese silk rope and have a lot of fun with it, those who enjoy extreme bondage will get a lot more out of it.

A Leash & Collar Set

Domination is a common activity in extreme bondage situations, and nothing makes you feel as dominant – or your partner as submissive – as a leash and collar set. You can have tons of sexy fun leading your partner around on the leash or letting them lead you around. The leash can also come in handy in more kinky domination scenarios.

When purchasing a leash and collar set, choose a collar that both looks good and feels good on, because you may want to wear it awhile. Keep safety factors in mind and never wear a collar that hurts or is made from cheap materials. Your leash should be similar.

A Spreader Bar

Nothing provides the dom a view as good as a spreader bar does, while still keeping the sub restrained. Spreader bars come in many shapes and sizes, and can restrain anything from just the feet to the whole body. Typically, the bar is used to spread the legs wide to expose the penis or vagina, and can definitely add extra excitement to an extreme bondage scenario.

A Hood

Forget blindfolds! Serious BDSM fans will appreciate a hood instead. A hood typically covers the entire face, but may leave the eyes and mouth exposed. In some hoods, only the eyes are exposed and in others, only the mouth is exposed. Your partner will truly feel submissive when you slip the hood over their heads and have them obey your commands.

A hood that covers the mouth should be made from a material that is breathable, or be constructed in a way that allows for easy and comfortable breathing. An extreme bondage scenario can go from fun to bad in a hurry if your partner can’t breathe through their hood.

Nipple Clamps Or Vibrators

Nipple play is a lot of fun during kinky sex, although many beginners don’t use clamps or vibrators much due to the intense pain factor. However, if you’re really into feeling pain mixed with pleasure, nipple clamps or vibrators will definitely do the trick. Some BDSM fans are tempted to use good old fashioned clothespins as clamps, and while the look can definitely be appealing, they’re more dangerous.

Clothespins will easily bruise the nipples and may cause such intense pain that the sub wants to stop. You can have a lot more fun with adjustable clamps, because they allow you to dial up the intensity gradually!

A Suspension Kit

For a dom, there are few things sexier than seeing his or her sub suspended in the air while being restrained. If you’re really into the BDSM scene, a suspension kit is an absolute must have. If you’re short on funds or don’t have the space for a heavy duty suspension kit, you can have just as much fun with a love swing or an over the door model.

Make sure that your suspension kit is built to hold you and your partner’s weight combined, and that it’s made from quality materials that will hold up over time.

Romance Tips: How to Make Your Anniversary Truly Special

Andrew Wang — Sat, 30 Jul 2011 23:00:40 +0000

Romance can be hard to come by in a marriage, but your anniversary is coming up and you need some date ideas! Here’s how to fill your anniversary with romance.

Whether your date nights have grown generally boring or you’re looking to really set this year apart from previous ones, your anniversary is a great time to plan a truly special and exciting date. Though some people value anniversary celebrations more than others, no one can resist a spectacular night of celebrating. You don’t even need a big budget to pull off an out-of-the-ordinary date. Plan ahead, consider your partner’s likes and dislikes, and get those creative juices flowing.

Planning Ahead

Depending on what you’re hoping to do for your anniversary, you should start planning anywhere from two weeks out to a full year beforehand. The first two things to take into account are your budget and whether or not you’re getting a gift for your S.O. If you’ve got a sizable budget or have lots of time to start saving money, you can come up with some pretty outlandish date concepts.

If you don’t already have a physical gift in mind, your date can actually become your gift, which then gives your budget a boost. They say that people who spend money on memory-making experiences are happier than those who buy tangible items. Unless you know that your mate expects a piece of jewelry or techie gadgetry every year, give them the gift of a truly memorable time together.

Take them to a concert for a band that they love or to a major sporting event. Do yourself one better and go to something that’s relevant to your relationship. Did you propose at a baseball game? Did you meet at a certain rock club? Go back there and recreate that special night. The tickets are your gift to them, and the awesome anniversary date is built right in.

Go Out Of Town

If your budget goes even further, give the gift of a trip. Plan a weekend getaway. It can be to somewhere that your S.O. has talked about wanting to visit, or it could be to somewhere else equally thoughtful. Maybe you no longer live where you first met.

Go back to the town where your romance blossomed and visit your old haunts. The act of being somewhere other than your current home will instantly spice things up. Demonstrating your thoughtfulness by picking a meaningful destination will show your mate that you’re still in love with him or her.

Local Date Ideas

Of course, if you don’t have the budget for a trip or a more expensive night out, you can still plan a great anniversary date. Plan a night or day full of the things you both enjoy doing most. Eat at you two’s favorite restaurant, grab a drink or two at your favorite bar, and do at least one thing that you both really enjoy.

If you’re both into Latin dancing, find a salsa night somewhere near you. Or if you both love going to the movies, go to a late night showing of something funny or romantic that will put you both in a good mood. Lots of cities have smaller theaters that sometimes show older movies, so you might even be able to find an older favorite of both of yours to watch on the big screen.

Sure, dinner and a movie or drinks and dancing might seem like typical dates, but if you put that extra special spin on it, it becomes a much more interesting night. Just make sure that whatever you do is something both you and your S.O. really enjoy. That way you’re both guaranteed to have a great time. Then head back in for the night and let your great moods carry over into passionate sex.

Low Cost Date Ideas

Should all else fail and your budget be nearly non-existent, remember that a picnic is always romantic, particularly after dark. Even if it’s just in your own backyard, dining al fresco and imbibing a little wine under the stars can make for an incredibly lovely evening. Depending on the remoteness of your location, bring a few blankets along and you could end up creating some extra hot memories, too. You’ll cherish them forever, even if you can’t tell anyone else about them.

Q&A: Her Vagina Smells Bad – What Do I Do? (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Sat, 30 Jul 2011 14:00:21 +0000

A vagina has a natural scent which some men enjoy and others don’t. Just like male genitals have a scent, so do female genitals. There are many things that could change the natural smell of the vagina and make the odor much stronger or even foul, so what do you do when the smell of her downstairs area becomes too much to handle?

Question: What do I do when her vagina smells really bad? I noticed, but I did not want to say anything. How do I kill that smell in my room, on my bed and on me?

–YouTube Viewer

Click here to view the embedded video.

Take A Shower Together Before Sex

As part of your foreplay routine, take a shower before sex. Sex in the shower can be super hot, and you can make washing your lover’s vagina part of turning her on. She’ll love the feel of your hands on her clitoris and labia as you soap her up, and she very well may want to do the same to you!

A shower before sex accomplishes two things – you get to wash your partner’s vagina without her really knowing that you’re washing it to get rid of odor (as long as you act like you’re trying to turn her on rather than scrub her clean) and you’re getting her aroused in the process. It’s a win-win situation!

Both Male And Female Genitals Have An Odor

Men may act like going down on a woman that has vaginal odor is the worst thing in the world, but many men forget that their genitals also have an odor. A man’s genitals smell a certain way, even when he is clean. His scent, however, will get stronger and more pungent in between showers and especially if he’s worked outside or engaged in physical activity such as jogging or aerobics.

A woman’s vagina is the same way – her natural smell is going to be less noticeable right after a shower, but it’s still there. It will get stronger as the day goes on, but this doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with her. Women who have more pubic hair will also have a stronger odor, simply because body fluids stick to the hair. Some people find that the scent of their partner’s genitals is arousing, while other people don’t like it at all.

Also, be aware that if you and your partner have sex often without a condom, your seminal fluid is going to be hanging out in her vagina. It’s not going to hurt anything to leave it in there and your partner’s vagina will eventually clean itself out, however, many people find it easier to simply rinse the semen out by douching.

It Could Be An Infection

Women are prone to vaginal infections such as bacterial or yeast infections. A bacterial or yeast infection can cause a woman’s odor to change and become stronger, even with proper genital hygiene. If she washes regularly, or you take a shower before sex and you still notice that your partner’s vagina has a strong odor, she may have an infection.

In this case, you may want to suggest going to the doctor. This can be an awkward conversation, but if you’re genuinely concerned about her and her health and offer to go with her without criticism, she’s not going to be as offended. Do NOT make it about you and how you can’t stand your partner’s vaginal odor. She will likely never have sex with you again!

Not A Chemistry Match

Both men and women release pheromones through their genitals, and different people are attracted to different pheromones. It all has to do with body chemistry – if you find that your partner almost always smells really good down there to you, her body chemistry is likely a great match for you. Alternatively, if you find that she almost always smells really bad to you – even if she has impeccable genital hygiene – she may not be a good chemistry match for you.

Foods That She Eats

You may have heard that eating certain foods will affect the taste of your semen, and the same applies to women. The food she eats will have an impact on her vaginal odor. If she eats a lot of cabbage, garlic, broccoli and onions, her vaginal odor is going to be very pungent. On the other hand, if she’s eating a lot of sweet foods like pineapple and strawberries, her vagina is going to smell sweeter as well.

When To See A Doctor

If you’ve gone through every possible cause of her vaginal odor and you still aren’t able to eliminate it, it may be time to get checked out by the doctor. Other reasons to bring a doctor on board are:

Pain while urinating (you or her)
Discharge coming from your penis
If odor doesn’t go away with hygiene or gets worse
Sexual intercourse is painful for her

There’s nothing embarrassing about going to see the doctor – if you’re not comfortable talking with the doctor you currently have about sex or the health of your genitals, find a new one. If your partner isn’t comfortable enough with her doctor to do so, encourage her to find a doctor she is comfortable with.

How To Talk To Her About It

Having to talk to her about her vaginal odor might seem impossible, but if you do it very carefully, it will end well. Some things to keep in mind are:

Don’t Joke About It

Never make jokes about her vaginal odor or make fun of her in any way. Never allow her to overhear you joking about it with your friends, never put it in a text, etc. etc. Guys can often be insensitive, but make sure you’re aware of her feelings the entire time.

Come Off As Concerned

Don’t approach her in a critical way – she’ll instantly get defensive. Instead, make sure she knows you’re concerned about her and her health, not about yourself. If she truly feels as though you care, she’ll be more willing to investigate the problem with you. Offer to go to the doctor with her and be supportive of her as you both try to figure out the root of the problem.

Be Honest With Her

Honesty is important here. While you want to be careful about what you’re saying, lying to her or trying to “sugar coat” the issue isn’t going to get you anywhere. Just be truthful with her in a courteous way.

Why Foreplay Is Critical!

Michael Webb — Fri, 29 Jul 2011 23:00:08 +0000

Foreplay is a critical first step for women, and men often overlook it. Men tend to approach sex in the wrong way. They think that the harder they penetrate, the harder she’ll orgasm. Unfortunately for women, this doesn’t work. Did you know the best way to make a woman orgasm is to not even put your penis inside her?

That’s right, good old third base is a home run for the ladies. The vagina has very few nerve endings past the opening, and hitting the g-spot through penetration is more about lucking out than mastering technique.

Fingering Her To A Frenzy

The male species often thinks that third base is a means to prepare her for his throbbing member, which is why the women they’re with tend not to respond with the screaming orgasm of which they are capable. If you re-program yourself to thinking about fingering as part of “having sex,” then you’ll be able to satisfy her on new levels. She will certainly thank you for it!

Mental Foreplay First

Before you make the journey into the bush, you have to start with foreplay first. Women don’t have the ability to dive right into sex the way men do. She needs a bit of a build up. This starts from the moment you hope to have sex with her later. Every small touch, glance, and kiss throughout the night draws her closer to you. It will be very difficult to get her started if you’ve been acting like she’s a stranger for the past several hours. She doesn’t have to feel completely in love with you, but she does need to feel some sort of connection.

Making Out

When you’re finally alone, never underestimate the power of a good make out session. Remember when you were a teenager and making out was so much fun? It’s because you didn’t really know what was going to come next. You hadn’t gotten to home base yet, or even third base, so the excitement of possibly getting to see her breasts or touch her vagina was almost too much to bear. Re-create that feeling all over again by not rushing a great make out session. Take your time and make her feel like you’ve got nothing else better to do than kiss her all night long.

Eventually, the make out session will lead to more than just kissing – but don’t try to force it. Start with gentle kisses that escalate into tongue tangling passion, and her nether regions will be begging for some attention once you get there. Do to her mouth what you plan on doing to her clitoris during oral sex – she’ll get the hint and it will turn her on even more to get a “preview” of what your tongue can do for her.

Fondling Her

In the midst of your good old fashioned make-out, put your hands other places, and I don’t mean breasts alone. You should stroke her back, her sides, her hair, and her breasts. Touch her softly and don’t rush it. Don’t manhandle her or grab her! You should be using your fingers to stroke her in sensitive places like her neck or the crease of her elbow, and you shouldn’t be touching any harder than you would touch the track pad on your laptop.

Once you’ve gotten her turned on enough, play with her nipples for a while, and then move elsewhere. Go back, move away, and repeat. Once you feel her breath quicken and her grip tighten, and you’re sure that she’s ready for you to make the next move, don’t leave her hanging! Get down there and touch away.

Don’t Assault Her

It is best to not go into full on assault mode. If you start fingering her right away before she’s really good and wet, it will hurt. Some women may get wet just from the kissing and touching, but some won’t. Don’t be afraid to have a good lube on hand. A dab of lube or more can make all the difference between pleasure and pain!

Start by massaging the outer parts of her vulva, and her inner thighs. If you just graze the clitoris now and again, it will send shock waves through her body. When it’s time, zero in on the sweet spot, and don’t move until she has had at least one mind-blowing climax. You can also give her oral sex – it’s probably a woman’s favorite way to get off and makes her more prone to having multiple orgasms!

Q&A: Fingering – What To Do When It Hurts (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Fri, 29 Jul 2011 14:00:21 +0000

Fingering should be pleasurable, not painful! There are lots of things that can cause a woman to feel pain when she’s being fingered, either during masturbation or as part of foreplay with her partner. Here’s what to do when fingering hurts!

Question: Hi Dan and Jennifer – I have a problem! Each time I put my finger into my girlfriend’s vagina, she says that it hurts – but it is only one finger and I want to give her a vaginal orgasm! All along I have been giving her a clitoral orgasm. I have my fingernails cut properly and I think one time I accidentally cut her vaginal wall to a point where it bled a little…does that affect anything? I really need help because I want her to feel good!

–YouTube Viewer

Click here to view the embedded video.

Common Reasons Fingering Can Hurt

There are many reasons that fingering can hurt – and it may be just one reason, or it may be many factors that contribute to pain during this activity.

Lack Of Proper Lubrication

The most common reason that fingering is uncomfortable or painful for a woman is if she’s not lubricated enough down there. Many people assume that if she’s turned on, she’ll be wet enough down there, while other people assume that spit is a good enough lube. If you really want to avoid pain during this activity, you’re going to want to use a good, water based lubricant and plenty of it. The more, the better!

If she’s not lubed up enough before you insert your finger into her vagina, it can be difficult for it to go in, and it can cause a lot of friction against the walls of her vagina. The vaginal tissues are very delicate and can tear or bleed if there’s too much friction without enough lubrication. Lube is inexpensive and can be purchased almost anywhere. There’s no reason not to use it!

Fingernails

If your fingernails aren’t cut or trimmed down well enough, or if you have hangnails, these can cut or tear the vaginal tissues inside. This is painful and may even cause bleeding! Take the time to trim your fingernails and cuticles, or if you don’t know how to do it yourself, man up and go get a manicure! Another option, especially for men who work with their hands and have rough calluses on their fingers, try wearing a condom or latex or vinyl glove when you finger your partner. This makes it go in and out smoothly, and you’re guaranteed not to hurt her.

Yeast Or Bacterial Infections

A lot of people don’t want to think about it, but a woman who experiences pain during fingering or intercourse may have a bacterial or yeast infection. Yeast and bacterial infections are common, and it simply happens when either the pH level in the vagina is out of whack or bacteria is introduced. In fact, you may have given her a bacterial infection if there was dirt and bacteria under your nails the last time you put your fingers in her vagina!

Chemicals On The Skin

It is so, so, so important to wash your hands before touching your partner’s vagina! Even if you’re only touching the clitoris or the labia – make sure your hands are clean first! Chemicals or substances on the hands can cause pain during fingering, especially if you’ve just dug into a basket of hot wings. Don’t assume that just because your hands look clean that they are – wash up with soap and hot water and your lady will thank you tremendously!

She May Not Be Aroused Enough

A woman has to be fully aroused before any down-there action can feel good. If you try fingering before she’s ready, she’s going to tighten her muscles and she’s not going to be relaxed enough for you to get your finger all the way inside. Coupled with not being lubed up enough, this scenario can be disastrous! Spend some time kissing her and engaging in foreplay before you actually make the move to start fingering her. Making sure that she’s aroused and practically begging you to do it will keep it from hurting her as much.

Using Too Many Fingers Too Fast

A lot of guys think that they can start fingering their partner with three fingers – and this is not the case! Starting with too many fingers or pushing too hard or too fast before she’s really ready for that level of action can cause extreme discomfort and pain. Start with one finger and work your way up as she gets more and more aroused.

How To Make Fingering More Pleasurable For Her

There are many ways to make sure that fingering is pleasurable for her. In fact, before you start trying to learn specific techniques to give her an orgasm, check out these basic tips to make sure you’re not hurting her.

Go slow and use lots of lube.
Start with one finger at a time and slowly work your way up to more if she seems into it.
Pay attention to her cues – she will let you know if it’s uncomfortable or not with her body language.
Can she finger herself without pain? If not, the issue may be bigger than you.
Try fingering in combination with oral sex. Start by licking her clitoris and when she’s aroused, slowly begin to use your finger.

When To Get Her Checked Out

If fingering always hurts, lube stings and she’s not even able to finger herself, there may be something going on down there that needs a doctor’s diagnosis. Infections will cause almost anything to be painful down there, even urination. Communicate with her about what hurts and why it hurts, and if she needs to go to the doctor, offer to go with her without passing judgement. Eliminating all the possible causes of pain during fingering is the best way to get to the root of the problem – and get rid of it!

My Ex Wants A Booty Call! Should I Accept?

He Said/She Said with John & Jenna — Thu, 28 Jul 2011 23:00:17 +0000

Sex advice often turns out to be wrong – especially when dealing with an ex. What should you do if your old significant other wants a booty call?

My ex I broke up recently, but he wants to keep hooking up NSA style, until one or both of us lands a new beau. Do you think that’s a good idea?

What She Said:

It depends. Are you still in love with your ex? Are you hoping sex will bring the two of you back together? Or are you surfing familiar terrains until someone new comes along? This is different from a “no strings attached/ just for sex” scenario because you two have a history and emotions are most likely lingering.

Finding Your True Motives

Sex with an ex can be a comforting thing. It can also be a very fun thing! It’s important to be honest with yourself as to why you’re really there (other than the obvious). If you’re hoping to win back your former partner, you need to ask yourself why. The two of you broke up for a reason, so you need to question why you’re going back now. If it’s your lover who’s initiated the physical contact, you need to clarify his or her intentions.

Finding HIS True Motives

Sorry to sound like a stick in the mud – I’m all for sex, whether it be a casual fling or a long lasting connection. The concern, in this instance, is the motivations on both sides. If you’re both clear as to why you’ve decided to hop back in bed, then sex with the ex is a “Yay!” If the lines are blurred and there’s the possibility of more heartbreak on the horizon, I’d advise you to skip it. There are plenty of other people out there, which means there’s no need to live in the past – even if that past involves a booty call.

What He Said:

You two broke up. There was probably a reason, right? What? You didn’t break up with this person because it was the most amazing, positive and life affirming experience of your life? Really? You’re trying to tell me you didn’t break up because it was amazing in and out of the sheets? Wow. Shocker. Please let me pause while I recover from the shock of that infinitely profound and unexpected response.

Wow. So that happened. As I recover the pieces of my freshly blown mind, I’m left with a thought: that relationship probably ended for a reason. Usually, a reason that’s perfectly reasonable, correct and valid (unless of course, you have relationship issues. Whole other column).

Do You Really Want To Get Burned Again?

If it ended for a reason, why would you go back? That’s like burning your hand on an open flame and then getting burned again because you wanted to see if you could put your hand on the flame in a different way without getting burned. It’s a flame. That’s your hand. You will get burned every time. Maybe not in the same way, maybe not to the same degree, but yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus and your ass will get burned every time you put in contact with an open flame.

So should you continue to hook up with someone you broke up with? I’m not sure what Miss Cleo or the Magic 8 ball will say, but I can’t see anything wrong with it, right? I mean what could possibly go wrong when you light a match on a gasoline tanker? Nothing wrong with that scenario!

Make Her Fall In Love With You – Using Only Words! (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Thu, 28 Jul 2011 14:00:06 +0000

Love advice can be complicated, but did you know you can make a woman feel love for you just by using the right words? If you choose the right phrases to make her feel happy, excited and warm towards you, she’s going to fall for you fast. Here are the phrases that you need to use if you want to make her go crazy over you!

Click here to view the embedded video.

Words Are Very Powerful!

Don’t underestimate the power that language has on a woman. Certain phrases can trigger thoughts,emotions and fantasies and can easily affect how a person feels in both good and bad ways. There’s no denying that words can be used to affect someone in many different scenarios. You can also read into the way another person is feeling and thinking by paying attention to the words they’re using in a conversation.

Of course, not just any word is going to make someone upset, happy, angry or excited. It’s the use of emotional language that does that. Emotional language is certain phrases that evoke emotion in someone, whether it makes them feel good or bad or anything in between. You can use innocent words to turn a woman on, or make her feel happy or ecstatic. So it’s no surprise that you can affect how a woman feels just by paying attention to the words you’re using and using the right phrases to make her feel the way you want her to!

Actions Speak Too

Remember that even if you take the best love advice to heart and use the right phrases to win a woman over, you’re still not going to get very far if you don’t follow them up with the right actions. If you’re going to “talk the talk” so to speak, you’ve got to be willing to “walk the walk.” If you say something flirty and nice, and then turn around and do something else that negates what you just said, any girl is going to be able to spot you as a fake. Make sure that your actions go along with what you’re saying and that you’re being genuine about it.

Examples Of Things To Say

Here are some excellent examples of phrases that are going to evoke emotion in a woman:

Happy – “I feel so happy being with you!”
Excited – “I’m so excited to see you.”
Love – “I love it when you….”
Adore – “I adore you!”
Confident – “You make me feel confident.”
Amazing – “I feel amazing around you.”
Incredible “You’re incredible!”

Using Words The Right Way

To have the impact you want on a woman when using language, it’s important that you pay attention and use it the right way. Avoid talking about things that create a negative energy around you, such as talking about your problems or complaining about the things around you. If you’re creating negative energy around you, you’re not going to be able to make anyone feel good regardless of what language you’re using.

Pay Attention To The Words She’s Using As Well

Women communicate with words much, much more than guys do. In fact, it’s estimated that women use on average 15,000 words a day while men use about 6,000 – so you can pretty much guarantee that she’s going to let you know how she feels and what she’s thinking in her language, even if she doesn’t come right out and say it. Listen to the hidden meaning behind the words she’s using and look for the emotions buried within.

Is she using phrases that suggest she wants to touch or kiss you? Are the phrases she’s using suggesting that she’s happy or having a good time? If so, you’re definitely on the right track! Alternatively, watch for phrases that suggest she’s not having fun or that she isn’t interested in you at all. A lot of guys don’t pay attention to it when a woman makes it clear that she’s not interested in them, simply because it’s not what they want to hear.

Consider Taking A Language Course

Because women use words so much more than men, if you want to really understand girls and how they think, you might want to consider taking a course on the subject. Becoming more knowledgeable about how people use language and the meanings behind certain phrases is going to help you indefinitely when it comes to understanding and talking to women. If you don’t want to take a course, there is tons of information out there on the Internet to help you learn to understand language and how people use it to communicate with each other!

Long Term Relationship: How NOT To Be A Nag

Andrew Wang — Wed, 27 Jul 2011 23:00:48 +0000

A long term relationship take some effort to keep. Nagging is one of those things that can destroy long term relationships if you let it – here’s how to stop!

Are You A Constant Nagger?

No one likes being called a nag. The term is full of all sorts of negative connotations. Yet all of us have probably done it to someone about something at one point or another. Maybe you find yourself repeatedly asking your mate to put their dirty laundry in the hamper and not on the floor. Perhaps you’ve requested over and over that your partner remember to deposit that check at the bank. Whatever the point of it, you know that it’s no fun being on either end of it.

When you’re the one being nagged, you feel annoyed with your S.O. Their nagging is a reminder that you’re not living up to their standards on this particular issue, and that never feels good. If you’re the one doing the fussing, you feel frustrated and exasperated. It’s not as though you want to get on to someone—you just want them to do something the first time you ask them to do it. The worst part of nagging is that you start to feel more like an angry parent and scolded child than a pair of two adults in a romantic long term relationship.

Are You On The Giving Or Receiving End?

The key to halting this in your long term relationship is being considerate and forgiving of each other. If you’re typically on the receiving end of it, ask yourself why. When your partner asks you do them a favor by picking up the dry cleaning once a week, be considerate of their wishes. Surely that partner does things for you. Maybe you get distracted easily and forget to pick up those clothes. To your partner that seems inconsiderate. That’s why they become annoyed and then get on to you about it.

Since you know that you’re prone to forgetting things, come up with a way to remind yourself, like putting a reminder into your phone. Sure, you might still forget from time to time, but if you do a better job overall, your partner will be more likely to forgive you when you do screw up. That means less fussing for you to have to endure.

Give Yourself A Reality Check

Should you be the one constantly fussing, try to check in with reality. If you’re doing it about little things, you might want to consider letting the issue go. Say your significant other always leaves the dishes on the counter instead of putting them into the dishwasher. This is probably a bad habit of theirs that they’re not likely going to change.

Instead of wasting your time and energy on fussing at your partner about it, just put the dishes away yourself. It probably takes less effort for you to load the dishwasher than it would to regularly complain to your S.O. about it. Don’t ever forget that you probably have a bad habit or two that bothers your mate. You’re not perfect, therefore you shouldn’t expect perfection from them either.

Is The Issue Bigger Than The Little Stuff?

What if there’s a bigger issue at hand than dry cleaning and dishes? Maybe you’ve been nagging your partner to stop smoking or cut back on their drinking. Instead of nagging in the moment, sit down and have a heart to heart with your mate. Do this at a time when you’re both in good moods and the problematic issue is not directly at hand. You truly are trying to help them overcome big problems here, but nagging may not be the right way to go about it.

Tell them how much you care about them, and why you need them to break their unhealthy habits for you. Then you should work together to come up with a plan. Promise them that you won’t be on their back about it every five minutes if they show you that they’re working to get better. Seek outside help or marriage counseling so that you’re not the lone person policing the issue. Above all, make sure that your S.O. knows that you’re doing this because you love them. If they love you as well, they’ll understand how well-meaning you are being.

Top 10 Best Dangerous Places To Have Sex (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Wed, 27 Jul 2011 14:00:33 +0000

Sex can be a lot of fun when you have it in different places – moving out of the bedroom can be all you need to bring back the spark between you and your lover. Many people love the thrill of having public sex, and some even love the idea of having sex in dangerous places. Here are the ten most danger filled places to get busy.

**Disclaimer**

Sex in the places named in this article can be very dangerous and could result in you or your partner getting very seriously hurt or dying. Proceed at your own risk.

Click here to view the embedded video.

High Up In A Tree

Take hunting to the next level by having sex in a tree stand. Or, if you really like to rough it, just make your next tree climbing adventure a little more sexy! Be aware that you could fall out – which can really hurt if you’re high up! Bonus points if you have a tree house to spend the night in.

On Top Of The High Diving Board Over An Olympic Size Pool

The views from a high dive are amazing, and having sex on the high dive can make you feel like you’re floating above the pool with almost nothing holding you up. This one can end badly though – if you have rough sex or get going too fast, you may very well fall off and into the pool. A back or belly flop may not be the worst thing, but if you hit the concrete, you’re in trouble.

While Rock Climbing

If you really want to connect with nature while feeling the thrill of having sex in a dangerous place, try having sex while rock climbing. Don’t try this on your first rock climb though – get to know the area and become experienced with rock climbing before trying to get busy on the ropes. If you do, make sure you and your lover are completely harnessed and that you have a third party around to call an ambulance if things end badly.

While Skydiving

You probably can’t get much more than a handjob or possibly oral sex in while skydiving, but the thrill is the same nonetheless. Again, don’t try to do this on your first skydive. Get a feel for it before you decide what can and can’t be accomplished on a dive.

In A Bucket Truck As High As The Bucket Will Go

This one is a little safer than some of the other suggestions here, but still carries risk with it regardless. If you know someone who owns a bucket truck, ask if you can borrow it for a few hours to “cut a tree limb” in your yard. Push the bucket up as high as it will go and join your partner for a sexy romp in the sky. Make sure to harness yourself in with the proper equipment!

On The Back Of A Pickup Truck While Going Down The Freeway

This one is just plain risky and can end very badly if there’s a wreck or the hatch in the back falls down. Bring a blanket with you and find a way that you can tie or belt yourselves in if you absolutely must try it.

On Top Of A Moving Train

Again, this one is very, very risky. There’s really no way to make this safer, because you can’t belt yourself in or use safety harnesses in any way. If you must have sex on top of a train, try doing it when the train is at the station and you can just pretend you’re moving.

In A Window Washing Basket

If you really like the idea of having public sex, a window washing basket is going to be right up your alley. There is some risk associated here, so make sure you’re strapped in properly before getting it on. The idea of doing it right in front of a window with no holds barred can be extremely erotic!

On The Ledge Of A High Rise Building

Much like having sex on a moving train, there really is no way to make doing it on the ledge of a high rise building any safer. Try doing it up against the window and looking out at the street below instead – or you may just fall off the ledge and be falling towards the street below head first!

In Your Car In The Summer With The Windows Up

Sweaty sex is good sex, but there’s a line that is crossed when you consider having sex in your car in the summer with the windows up. You could definitely experience heat stroke and pass out, dying of heat suffocation before you can come to. If you must have sex in your car in the summer, crack the window!

How To Set Up A Perfect Date At Home

Michael Webb — Tue, 26 Jul 2011 23:00:26 +0000

Date ideas for the summer are fun – going to the fair, going swimming or just hanging out in the backyard grilling. However, the romance really gets going when the temperature outside starts dropping. Cooler weather gives us the perfect opportunity for romantic date ideas – just think: fireplaces, snugly duvets, hot chocolate, romantic movies and comfort foods like pizza and pasta. Here is a great idea for getting cozy this winter.

You can either organize this date together as a couple, or you can use it as an excuse to create a sense of “togetherness” or “team spirit” in the relationship. Alternatively, for extra romance and excitement, you can organize a surprise date for your partner. One suggestion is to have a date at home and call it “Movie Night.”

The Makings Of A Good “Movie Night”

If you or your partner has kids, then the number one priority is finding a good baby sitter – or leaving the kids with their doting grandparents for the evening. After that, the night is all yours. While you may be tempted to plan an evening where you can watch movies with the kids, this doesn’t give your lover the feeling of romance at all. That would be considered more of a “family night,” which is a great idea for another time.

If You’re Surprising Your Partner

If the evening is a surprise for her, you can make her feel extra-special by organizing the movie night around her favorite things. My suggestion would be to choose a romantic “chick-flick” type movie and order her favorite take-out. Also, don’t even think about forgetting her favorite ice-cream or dessert!

A movie night full of romance means popcorn and junk food – so stock up on all of these. The more choice there is, the more she will see how much effort has been involved. Before she gets home, make sure everything is neat and tidy and that she does not have to do any work. You want her relaxed and pleasantly surprised.

Get The Place Ready

Set up the sitting room/television area with comfortable cushions and warm blankets – you could even put a mattress on the floor. Before you start the movie, chat about the good old days, about how the two of you met and what you thought at that moment. Look back at the travels and enjoyable times you two had together and all the fun moments. If need be, bring out the photo albums and browse through pictures of the two of you together and recall what was happening when that picture was taken. This is all part of the warm-up for later.

When You’re Ready For The Movie

After reminiscing about everything that you and your partner have gone through to get where you are today, it’s time to refill the wine/champagne/snifter glasses, dim the lighting and press play. Snuggle with her during the movie, hold hands and play footsie. Make sure you’re maintaining that flirty feeling throughout the movie – what you want her to do is to be thinking mostly about you but “pretending” to watch the movie. This is intense mental foreplay and works wonders for women!

Finally, when the movie is over and there is this “awww geesh” kind of feeling in the air, get up silently, switch on the CD and invite your lady to dance with you to your favorite song.

Taking The Evening A Little Farther

If you’ve done everything right and your girl is in the mood for love, she may start to flirt with you and get a little frisky. If you feel like this is where the evening is headed, let it! Kiss your partner deeply and release the passion you’ve been feeling for her since before you started the movie. Let her feel that you’ve been waiting for her all night long. She will respond to this very well and will most likely head to the bedroom with you for night of hot, passionate sex!

Dirty Talk Done Right (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Tue, 26 Jul 2011 14:00:37 +0000

Dirty talk can spice up your sex life, but it’s hard to know what to say and when to say it. If you say the wrong thing, it’s easy to turn a woman off or offend her. Sometimes you can rectify a mistake like that and sometimes you can’t. It’s much better to avoid the blunder in the first place. Here’s how to do dirty talk – the RIGHT way!

Click here to view the embedded video.

Girls Love Dirty Talk

Believe it or not, almost all women love dirty talk. They may blush or shy away, but in all honesty, they really do like it! Some women may prefer a more romantic style, while others want to hear hardcore details and expletives. Regardless of what style a particular girl prefers, almost all women love hearing something while doing the dirty.

The right language in the bedroom will help a woman to open up mentally and emotionally, which is necessary for her to become really turned on and reach orgasm. So learning the right things to say to a woman while you’re getting it on is going to benefit both you and her!

How To Tell What She’ll Like And What She Won’t Like

Not every girl is going to like the same thing when it comes to dirty talk. In fact, some phrases that will turn a woman on without you even touching her may be something that another girl is completely offended by. Don’t assume that the dirty talk phrases that worked for one woman is going to work just as well for another.

Get To Know Her

This is one of the biggest benefits to a long term relationship or marriage. When you really get to know a girl, you start to understand the way her mind works. You’ll begin to understand what she does and doesn’t like in the bedroom and why. This will help you to find the right things to say when using dirty talk during sex.

How Does She Normally Talk?

Pay attention to how she speaks. Does she use a lot of expletives or does she talk more demurely? Does she speak differently to you than other people? Does she show you a side of her that is different than what she shows her parents or co-workers? Take your cues directly from her. If you’ve never heard her say a swear word, she’s probably going to be pretty offended if you drop the F-bomb in the sack. However, if she likes to get a little wild with her language sometimes, she’s not going to enjoy you talking about what you’re going to do to her “vagina.”

How To Get Started

Experiment with different words in the bedroom (or wherever else you like to have sex) and gauge her reaction to them. If you’ve already gotten to know her and have taken your cues from the language she usually uses, you’re probably not going to strike out here. Still, you want to gauge her reaction to see if what you’re saying to her is actually turning her on, or if it’s turning her off.

A great way to get started is to tell her what you want her to do to you. Lead by example first, and describe to her what you’d like her to do – either with soft or explicit language, whichever you feel she will respond best to. Then later, you can try flipping the tables to see if she will do the same for you. After you lead her into it, she may get incredibly turned on and start talking dirty too!

Does She Like To Talk Or Listen?

While most women do enjoy dirty talk, not everyone is going to enjoy both talking and listening. She may just enjoy one or the other. Get to know her to determine what she likes better, or if she really does like both. This is part of feeling it out as you get started. You’ll notice her respond better either when she’s doing the dirty talking or when she’s listening to you describe in detail what you want her to do to you or what you’re going to do to her.

Take The Risk

Dirty talk is a lot of fun and if you pay attention to your girl and really read her, it’s unlikely you’re going to say the wrong thing. It’s definitely worth the risk – so take it! You’re never going to know how much you can turn your partner on with dirty talk until you actually take that first step and do it!

Do Women Expect Too Much From Men?

He Said/She Said with John & Jenna — Mon, 25 Jul 2011 23:00:33 +0000

A relationship is about give and take, but many men think that in a relationship with a woman, they’re doing nothing but giving. Is that true?

What She Said

Umm, no. Granted, I am a woman and you haven’t given us much to go on with this question. In general, society still plays a large part in defining roles of gender and, thusly, behavior. It’s up to us as individuals to unravel what that means in our lives.

What IS Expected Of Men?

I assume you’re speaking from the vantage point of what’s wanted from men and dating, given the nature of our column. I acknowledge that men have certain pressures when it comes to relationships – the biggest sticking point with many guys being the assumption of who pays on dates. We’ve covered that several times here, but I’ll say it again – it’s not how much you spend, it’s the thought that counts. Being honest while living within your means will make for a happier relationship.

Every Woman Wants Different Things From A Man

Since I don’t have much to go on, I’ll tell you what I want from a guy – the same thing I expect from myself. Honesty, respect, communication, love and companionship all rate high on my list. Money, childcare, romance, how much time spent with the in-laws and who cleans the house are common issues. Every couple has different answers as far as these expectations go, but I’d assume the happiest relationships are where the balance of the responsibilities is relatively equal.

If He Feels Overwhelmed

If a man feels that too much is expected of him, he might want to take a look at two things – himself and the relationship he’s in. Expectations are just that – it’s up to you how (or if) you decide to fulfill them. It’s your life and resentment is a terrible waste. Don’t be a victim and assume you have to live up to someone else’s vision. Make your own rules and find a partner who believes in a similar way of life. You can’t control what others want from you (much less an entire gender), but you can control how you react.

What He Said

Do girls want too much from men? Hell yes! You want us to pay, you want us to be nice, but not too nice, you want us to love you for your mind as well as your body, you want us to put the seat down, you want us to want to do the dishes. You want a bad boy, but you want him to be monogamous, you want passion, you want consistency, you want him to have six pack abs, you want him to eat healthy, but not eat like a girl, you want him to last all night and fuck like a porn star, blah, blah, blah.

Is It Too Much?

That’s a lot to live up to. It used to be that girls were the ones burdened with all the unrealistic expectations that society heaped upon them in droves. Now men are getting our fair share. When did that happen? Where’s gender inequality when you need it? Men are starting to be as insecure as the ladies, if not more so, about sex and their bodies. That’s not right! That’s your problem. Not ours! Damn feminism. Damn you Gloria Stenheim!

Wait…what was I talking about?

The 3 Biggest Female Turn-Offs In Bed (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Mon, 25 Jul 2011 14:00:18 +0000

Most sex advice will tell you how to turn a woman ON, but not what you need to avoid. Most of the time, sex advice will go on about techniques to please a woman, but they fail to tell you what not to do to keep her from throwing you off her and walking out the door. Steer clear of these three major issues women have with guys during sex and you’re home free.

Click here to view the embedded video.

Every Woman Is Different

There are tons of different turn-ons and turn offs when it comes to women. Each woman has her own set of things that turn her on, like foreplay or oral sex, and things that turn her off. These things will differ from woman to woman. However, there are some things that men do when getting it on that most women don’t like. When you’re with a girl for a period of time, you’re going to learn her specific likes and dislikes. However, you can be pretty sure that every woman isn’t going to like these three things:

Being Excessively Polite In Bed

Weak, wimpy guys do not turn women on. In fact, quite the opposite! So if you’re excessively polite in the sack, saying things like “Please can I do this,” or “What do you think about this” is going to turn her off completely. Instead, focus on being confident and assertive during sex. Girls prefer a strong, confident guy who knows what he wants to a guy who is constantly worried about what he’s doing or if he’s doing it wrong.

Examples Of What Not To Do

Asking permission for everything in bed.
Never showing any dominant, masculine energy.
Apologizing for anything while getting busy.

Just because you’re being strong and masculine doesn’t mean you need to treat a woman badly. You can still be dominant and assertive while still being loving and caring towards her. Being a jerk towards her doesn’t make you confident – it just makes you a jerk. Show girls your confidence by knowing what you want and knowing how to give a woman an orgasm.

Lack Of Emotion During Sex

Very few sex advice manuals out there talk about how to be emotional while knocking boots. They’re mostly technique driven, teaching you how to touch a woman’s clitoris or finger her g-spot. However, technique is only going to get you so far. Women are emotional creatures, and experience emotion deeply when getting busy. It’s just part of their nature. Failing to show emotion and acting like a robot while getting it on isn’t going to win you any points, even if you can touch her exactly the way the sex advice book you read told you to.

Don’t be afraid to show your emotional side when making love. Let pleasure, pain or ecstasy overcome you and let it out. Let it show on your face and in your voice. Let yourself be consumed by the moment instead of being focused on every technique you learned. A woman wants to experience that with you, and she wants to know that she’s doing a good job pleasing you.

Ways To Show Emotion

Make noises while making love.
Talk romantically to her or use dirty talk if she’s into it.
Show emotional vulnerability inside and outside the bedroom.

Going Straight For The Gold

Another big faux pas when getting it on – and perhaps the biggest complaint among women – is when a guy goes straight for the gold. He comes in, does his thing, has an orgasm and rolls over and goes to sleep. Chances are, you’re not going to get laid by this woman again. She will think you don’t care about her and only cared about yourself and your pleasure.

Instead, focus on her pleasure first. Give her oral sex before you even have intercourse with her. Read sex advice manuals and learn new techniques to bring her pleasure. Combine new techniques with being confident and emotional, and you’ll have her completely wrapped up in you. She’ll want to get busy with you all the time!

When you find new ways to turn her on and pleasure her, you’re both going to get more nookie in the end. Experimenting with new ways to have fun and mix it up is going to keep her interested in having sex with you. If you use the same techniques over and over, she’s going to get bored and want to find something – or someone – else to do. Always be learning new techniques to keep things fresh and exciting.

Being A Supportive Partner When Times Get Rough

Andrew Wang — Sun, 24 Jul 2011 23:00:42 +0000

A relationship go through many ups and downs. Here’s how to be a great spouse, boyfriend or girlfriend in your relationshipp when things are difficult.

For Better Or For Worse

Everyone who’s ever been to a wedding or seen one on TV or in a movie knows the gist of typical wedding vows. There’s a line in there about sticking it out whether you’re healthy or sick, rich or poor. This shouldn’t just apply to married couples, of course. If you’re in a relationship with someone and they fall ill or lose their job, you should be there for them. You would want them to help you through your rough time, so you should treat them in the same manner.

How To Show Love When Things Get Hard

There are so many different ways that you can show your love during tough times. Whether your S.O. has lost their job or a loved one, just being there to listen to them will get you off to a good start. Offer to help where you can, but never be forceful about it. Say your boyfriend just got laid off from his job. Give him a few days to be upset, and then ask if there’s anything you can do to help. If he says he doesn’t need help, keep in mind that his ego is suffering.

Forcing your help on him right now might just make him feel worse and in even less control of his life. So give him space where he needs it. When someone is upset and hurting, it’s important to be observant. Follow their cues and you’ll help them in the best way possible.

Empathy Isn’t Everything

While empathy is incredibly important, don’t ever pretend to understand what your mate is going through if you haven’t been there yourself. If your girlfriend’s parent just passed away, and both of yours are still alive and healthy, you can’t tell her that you get what she’s experiencing. If you do, that could start an argument.

When a person is grieving, they feel like no one can really understand their pain. Your job is to make sure that your mate doesn’t feel alone. Tell her that, even if you can’t truly understand her particular sorrow, you want her to know that you’re here for her. If she needs to cry, yell, or just be held, you’ll be with her for all of it.

Be Throughful

Perform thoughtful acts without being asked to do so. If your S.O. typically does the cooking or the cleaning, take on some of that work so he or she can have extra time to do whatever helps them mellow out. Encourage them to get some form of exercise, which will help them feel better. Gently nudge them out into the outside world so they can’t just sit around all day focusing on their unhappiness. Of course, if they resist, never push them.

Perhaps if they’re not up for going out, you can coax them into watching their favorite funny movie or playing a game they like. Just try to get them smiling again. Sex can also be very healing, though you should try to be understanding if your significant other needs a break. When you’re stressed or depressed, your sex drive can take a real dive, so don’t take it personally if they’re not really in the mood.

Be Kind

Ultimately, the key to being a really supportive S.O. is to make sure that you are there when you’re needed. Be respectful of your mate’s need for alone time as well as together time, and never force things on someone who’s upset. Treat you S.O. kindly during a difficult time, and they will appreciate it on many levels, for many years to come.

Should You Try Water Bondage?

Kaylen Jackson — Sun, 24 Jul 2011 14:00:27 +0000

Water bondage is form of restraint that includes playing with water in addition to ropes, ties and gags. Having sex in the pool or shower is definitely fun, and restraining your partner can be too. Should you combine the two and try water bondage? Or is it really something better left to the hardcore sex lovers?

What Is Water Bondage?

Water bondage is a type of BDSM sex act where water is used in addition to ropes, restraints, gags and other equipment. The sub in this situation is usually tied up or gagged, and either sprayed or dunked. Often, the sprays are strong and painful, as this is a part of the “torture” involved in this type of activity.

Sometimes a Houdini tank is used in professional scenarios, and in intense situations, a breathing apparatus may be used as well. Breath play involves dunking the sub underwater and forcing them to hold their breath for as long as possible, giving them the sensation of pressure on their lungs and invoking the fear of drowning.

Is Water Bondage Dangerous?

Water bondage can be very dangerous if not done properly, especially when working with a large body of water. It’s not something that should be taken lightly – it’s a very, very hardcore form of domination and most people aren’t going to be into it. You really have to be enjoy the pain or fear factor to enjoy it. Here’s why it can be more dangerous than it is fun and why you might want to leave it to the professionals:

Dunking

Dunking can be especially dangerous, because the sub is not able to speak or make gestures to let someone know if they are running out of air. This can easily cause the sub to drown, because no one really knows how long they can really hold their breath. If the dom is particularly aroused by the dunking, he or she may be more apt to leave the sub underwater for longer than they can handle.

Spraying

Spraying is another popular form of water bondage, which includes spraying high pressure streams on the sub while they are tied up or restrained. The higher the pressure, the more it hurts, so in some scenarios, the sprays will be from high pressure, industrial type hoses. In soft core scenarios, the sprays may be from a shower head or a regular hose.

Staying Safe

While this is an extreme form of BDSM and is therefore dangerous in and of itself, there are some ways that you can try to stay as safe as possible if you decide to engage in an activity like this. Going for light bondage or sex in the water can be a great way to get your “feet wet” so to speak, without engaging in the type of activity that hardcore BDSM fans like to do.

Don’t Use Gags

While a gag can be fun during other types of BDSM play, it can take the danger level of water bondage up quite a bit. Being submerged or sprayed heavily can make it difficult or impossible to breathe. A gag also makes it difficult to breathe, and when you combine the two, it can be almost impossible for a sub to catch his or her breath properly. Choose one or the other, but avoid using both.

Avoid Submersion

Submersion or dunking is probably the most intense part of this form of BDSM and is probably the most dangerous. Some hardcore fetish websites feature women or men being chained or tied up in a tub or tank, where they are barely able to get their heads out enough to breathe. This may seem erotic, but it’s actually incredibly dangerous. Spray your sub with a hose, but avoid submerging them.

Come Up With A Safe Word/Gesture

With any BDSM play, it’s important to have a safe word picked out before you start. With hardcore play, a gesture might be in order if a gag is being used or the sub cannot speak for other reasons. If you’re using a gag, do not bind the hands so much that the safe gesture cannot be used and if the hands are bound, do not gag the mouth so the safe word cannot be used. Make sure that both the dom and the sub agree that all play stops immediately if the safe word or gesture is used!

5 Mistakes You Don’t Want To Make When Giving Your First Blowjob

Kaylen Jackson — Sat, 23 Jul 2011 14:00:12 +0000

Your first blowjob should be great – not a disaster. A lot of women make mistakes when it comes to giving their guy head, and most of the time, little issues will be overlooked because it feels so good. However, if you screw it up big time, he won’t want it from you again! Here’s what you want to avoid when giving a first blowjob.

Using Your Teeth

It may seem like a good idea to graze your guy’s shaft lightly with your teeth or giving the head of his penis a little nibble (you like your clitoris nibbled every once in awhile, so why wouldn’t he?), but really, it’s not. Teeth can hurt and unless your man is a super masochist and enjoys cock and ball torture, letting him feel your pearly whites during fellatio is going to turn him off before you even know what happened.

Avoid using your teeth during your first blowjob by wrapping your lips tightly over them. Make sure your lips are well lubricated, either by your saliva or a good flavored lube. If your lips are dry, they won’t slide well over the shaft of your partner’s penis.

Sucking Too Hard

Lots of girls think that the harder they suck during fellatio, the more pleasurable it will be for a man. While a little bit of sucking, and even firm sucking if he’s close to orgasm is a good thing, if you do it too hard, you’re going to do much more harm than good. It may actually feel too sensitive or be painful for you to suck on his penis very hard, and it will turn him off when you do.

In this case, light sucking and licking is going to be sufficient here. Start out with light licking to tease him and get him warmed up (guys need foreplay too), and then progress to moderate sucking as he gets more and more turned on. Don’t cross the threshold though and do it too hard or too furiously.

Not Listening To His Cues

It’s crucial to listen to a man’s cues during fellatio. His body language will tell you if you’re on the right track or not. A man will thrust his pelvis towards your face, grab your hair or head and vocalize their pleasure when it’s feeling really good. If you’re not getting these results, change what you’re doing – you’re either hurting him or just not doing enough.

Also, don’t assume that if he likes something at first, that he’s going to like it the entire time you’re giving him head. Your technique should vary throughout the duration (seriously, who wants boring fellatio from a one trick pony?) and increase in intensity as he gets closer and closer to orgasm. His non-verbal cues will vary – he may start out gasping for breath and bucking furiously when you start a certain technique, but he may soon relax and get comfortable with it. In which case, you need to move on to a different technique ASAP.

Seeming Bored With It

Enthusiasm is 50% of a great first blowjob. Don’t ruin great fellatio by acting like you really would rather be doing something else. When guys fantasize about getting head, they often fantasize about whoever is doing it being really excited to do it. If you act bored with the act or don’t seem like you’re into it at all, he’s going to pick up on it immediately.

Some guys don’t vocalize their pleasure during oral sex, making it difficult for a woman to feel into it. Encourage him to show you that he’s enjoying it so you can get off on his pleasure too.

Choosing The Wrong Oral Sex Positions

There’s nothing more awkward than a woman trying to get into an oral sex position that bends a man’s penis a strange way. She may think that she’s being adventurous or exciting by doing it this way, but it really just takes away from his pleasure. Make your first blowjob all about your technique and pick a simple, tried and true oral sex position that you know will work.

Try giving him oral sex while he’s standing and you’re kneeling. Place a pillow underneath your knees so you stay comfortable. You can also have him lie on the bed with you cuddled up in between his legs. This allows you a little less control and makes it difficult for him to watch you, but you can prop his head up with pillows to give him a great view.

5 Tricks To Lasting All Night Long

Isabella Stone — Fri, 22 Jul 2011 23:00:17 +0000

Premature ejaculation affects a lot of guys. Tell me if this scenario sounds familiar: you’re in bed with a girl, you’re both enjoying yourselves, and you’re about to wow her with your next move when wham! You finish early. Your girl smiles and mumbles something, and you feel like a sexual failure.

This scene is all too common, but it thankfully can be avoided next time with just a few tweaks. Use the following tips next time you feel the need to push off that inevitable moment, and last all night.

Distract Yourself

Forget the usual advice to “think about baseball.” Or Margaret Thatcher naked. You don’t want to be scared off sex forever! It may seem counter-intuitive, but the best thing to distract yourself with is how sex feels, looks, even smells and tastes.

Instead of mindlessly pumping away toward the Big O, pay attention to other things, like how soft your partner’s skin is, the curve of her neck, or the pain of her nails dragging down your back. Notice the smell of her skin and the wetness between her thighs. When you become mindful, you can last longer and enjoy the sexual experience more. What could be better than that?

Concentrate On Her Pleasure

Instead of focusing on yourself, make it all about her. Choose positions that feel best for her (trust me, she’ll let you know when you’ve hit the right spot). Pay attention to her body’s cues, and you won’t be so hung up on your own.

Women are all about foreplay, so if you can make the foreplay last a long time it won’t matter if you finish shortly after the actual sex starts because in her head it started long before the actual penetration. Once she’s had a few orgasms, keep going, and try to get a new personal “high score.” Remember, a high percentage of women are multi-orgasmic, so challenge yourself to give her more than last time! Making the experience better for her is going to not only improve your stamina but will also improve your sexual reputation.

Change Sex Positions

This is the single easiest thing you can do to avoid premature ejaculation. If you feel yourself getting a bit too heated in one position, move to a completely different one. If you are in doggy style, move to missionary. The trick is to really change it up-moving from one variation of doggie to another isn’t going to cut it. Be careful not to change sex positions too frequently, as it is going to take her out of the mood and feel more like a distraction than anything else.

Wear A Condom

First of all, you should be practicing safe sex anyway, and for most of you, that means wearing a condom. However, if you are in a long term relationship, or you’ve both been tested and she’s on the pill, condoms might not seem like a necessity. If you’re having trouble lasting, though, that little prophylactic can be a lifesaver. We all know that condoms can dull sensation? In this case, a little dulling is exactly what you need. There are plenty of good brands out there now that feel almost like you’re not wearing anything, except that little extra something can keep you lasting much longer.

Change Your Masturbation Habits

If I were to tell you to stop masturbating altogether, and you were to actually listen, your next sexual encounter would probably be record for shortest time between start and finish. I won’t tell you to stop the self-love! I will, however, let you in on a secret. When you are young and just discovering masturbation, you tend to do it fast and furiously, which made sense back then because you were trying not to get caught. Nowadays you hopefully have more leisure but probably still use the vice-grip, carpal-tunnel inducing, furious shake technique you used at 14. Stop it!

Use your self-love time to retrain your body to sustain an erection. Use the start-stop technique of backing off when you feel an orgasm coming on. Doing that a few times will not only train your penis to stay hard without cumming, it will also make the inevitable payoff mind-blowingly better than your normal orgasm.

This technique also translates well to the bedroom. Slow down every time you’re on the verge and by the time you do climax the release will be incredible.

Being an amazing lover isn’t all about lasting longer in bed, but using these tricks to make yourself last longer can have the effect of making you a better lover. With just a few simple tweaks to your technique, you can improve your stamina, keep going all night long, and make yourself seem like a sex god in her eyes. It’s a win-win for both of you.

Q&A: She’s Pregnant By Another Man – But Wants To Be With Me! (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Fri, 22 Jul 2011 14:00:02 +0000

A pregnant girlfriend is one thing, but what about being with a girl who is pregnant by someone else? Are you supposed to be in a relationship with her and take care of the baby because no one else will, or can you decide that you’re not ready for this and move on? What do you do?

Question: First off, let me say I love you two! But I’m in a hard situation. A very good friend of mine is pregnant (by accident, old story of condom in the wallet) and she opened up to me and said she starting to love me and wished that the baby was mine! I’m not really sure how I feel about her. Any advice? And again I love you two, great advice!

–YouTube Viewer

Click here to view the embedded video.

What Are You Okay With?

Before you think of how your friend will feel, or how the baby might feel, or how anyone else will, you need to think about how YOU feel about the situation. Take some time outside of the situation to mull it over and think about the different possibilities here and how they might affect your life or the way you live. What are you okay with? What are you willing to be okay with? Tell your friend you need some time out to think about the situation – you at least deserve that.

Do You Want To Take Care Of Her And The Baby?

When you sit down and really take stock of the situation and how you feel about it, there might be a feeling of guilt or responsibility to take care of your friend and the baby. This is going to be especially true if you have at least some romantic feelings towards her, or care about her and your friendship very deeply. Stop right there!

Remember that you didn’t get her pregnant and you’re not responsible for the situation at hand. Yes, you can decide that you want the responsibility and that’s great – but remember that you don’t have to. Don’t guilt yourself into taking care of her and the baby because you feel obligated to. That’s not going to end very well. Make sure that if you do end up getting into a relationship with your friend and being a father figure to the baby that it’s really something you want to do – not something that you feel like you have to do because no one else will.

What If You Don’t?

If you decide that you don’t want to be with a girl who is pregnant (or if you don’t want to be with her), and you don’t want to take care of a baby once it’s born, that’s completely your prerogative. Remember, you didn’t get her pregnant! Don’t let anyone pass judgement on you and certainly don’t feel like you have to pass judgement on yourself. This is totally your call, and it’s perfectly fine to decide that this isn’t where you want your life to go right now. You don’t owe her anything.

Be Honest With Her

It’s your right to decide to do whatever you want to do in this situation, but you do need to be honest with her and truthful about how you feel. Yes, you do need to be delicate here, but honesty is the most important thing. If you decide not to be with her, explain to her why you feel this way and make sure the conversation stays limited to how you feel.

If you stick to your feelings about the situation, she can’t argue with it. However, if you present an entire list of logical reasons as to why a relationship between the two of you couldn’t work, she can argue with it – and she can probably make some pretty valid points. Remember that the choice to be with her or not was based on your feelings (not logic), so your explanation should too.

Give It A Trial Run

If you’re not sure about it, why not give it a try? Try being in a relationship with this girl and seeing how it develops. Talk to her about your idea to try it out, and make sure that she knows you have the right to decide that it’s not for you at any point in time. This also gives her the opportunity to try out a relationship with you without the commitment to be with you for a certain period of time or even be with you when the baby arrives. Don’t think that if you try it now that you’re stuck forever. Let it play out and see what happens!

Women’s Masturbation Secrets – REVEALED!

Michael Webb — Thu, 21 Jul 2011 23:00:15 +0000

I have some shocking news. Girls like to masturbate. Of course they do, masturbation is really fun! They masturbate far more than you give them credit for. In fact, for a shockingly large amount of women, that is the only way they can achieve orgasm. While you’re aimlessly poking around down below, she’s thinking, “Whatever, just fake it so he’ll stop. I can take care of myself later.” This is not because of your inadequacies as a lover, nor is it unfixable. It’s simply a lack of understanding how her body works.

Men and women experience sex in very differently. For men it’s relatively easy: see woman, want to have sex with woman, hopefully penis will touch woman. Obviously that is an oversimplification, but, compared to the woman’s experience, that’s all it is. If you develop a better understanding of how women satisfy themselves, perhaps it would seem less complicated.

She Creates A Mood

In order to achieve orgasm, a woman needs the right atmosphere. She doesn’t light candles and get out the satin sheets every time she masturbates; she just needs to feel comfortable. If not, she can’t concentrate on the task at hand, so to speak. If she is too cold or too exposed or too anything that distracts her pleasure, it’s not going to happen. That sounds daunting, but finding the right ambient balance isn’t too difficult if her mind is calm. Plus, extreme horniness will always overtake any environmental distractions.

She Sets A Pace

Regardless of the method, a woman fingers herself rhythmically. Meaning, there is an even flow of strokes and caresses, allowing her to concentrate on the sensations each touch gives. A choppy technique can be distraction. Whereas a man responds to physical stimulation alone, a woman puts herself into an almost meditative state. Otherwise, no amount of touching will induce orgasm. Again, this sounds quite complicated to men, but a woman does know how to adjust her focus in different situations.

She Has A Specific Technique

All women have that one sure-fire orgasm making technique. This is not to say that a woman has only one way of satisfying herself, but she does have a method that guarantees her orgasm. I know that you are hoping that I’m about to tell you what it is, but I’m not. It is as diverse as ladies themselves. Some women like direct manual stimulation of the head of the clitoris, but some ladies are far too sensitive and require indirect stimulation. There are even girls who can get off just by rubbing their inner thighs. Whatever her technique, find out what it is, and learn to employ it in given situations.

She Uses A Vibrator

Many girls start out using their fingers during masturbation, but it doesn’t take long for them to graduate to sex toys when they get older. Once a woman tries a vibrator, there’s often no going back – simply because a vibrator offers pleasure whenever she wants it and can make her orgasm fast and hard. Girls are busy ladies after all, and they don’t always have time to sit around and finger themselves for an hour until they reach climax. Instead, using a vibrator can help her get things done quickly, with just as much – if not more – pleasure than if she used her hands alone.

She Reads Erotic Novels

Men look at porn when they masturbate, but women don’t respond to visual stimuli the way men do. They prefer to use their imaginations to think about sex and different sexual scenarios that turn them on. Sometimes, women can do this on their own without any help at all, but other times, she may enjoy reading a romantic or erotic novel before she masturbates or while she’s doing it. Girls love using erotic novels for masturbation because it really gets their biggest sexual organ involved – their brain!

She Does It More Than Once

If a girl reaches orgasm through masturbation once, it’s likely that she’ll do it again a few times before she’s thoroughly finished. Many times, girls will experience their first round of multiple orgasms through masturbation, simply because they stop after the first orgasm but realize they don’t feel quite done yet. Unlike men, girls don’t go back down to an unaroused state after their first orgasm. Instead, they go back to the “plateau” phase – which comes after the foreplay phase but before the orgasmic phase. That makes it much easier for her to reach orgasm again after the first time!

Top 10 Best Places To Have A Quickie (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Thu, 21 Jul 2011 14:00:34 +0000

Sex can be super fast and incredibly fun – it’s called a quickie. Getting it on with a time limit of several minutes can leave you and your partner flushed, exhilarated and wanting more. Here are some excellent places to go when you want to get busy on the fly.

Click here to view the embedded video.

On A Hospital Elevator

Having sex in a hospital elevator can definitely lift a somber mood, and it’s even better when you’re at the hospital for something happy like the birth of a baby. Heck, why not practice making a baby right then and there? Press the stop button (make sure there’s not an alarm on it) and go at it. And you definitely want to press the stop button – hospital elevators are well known for stopping at almost every floor to let doctors and nurses off and on. Also, watch where you’re going! The elevator may very well take you into the morgue.

The Exam Table At The Doctor’s Office

Forget reading magazines or organizing your to-do list on your phone while you wait for the doctor to come in and examine you. Instead, hop up on the exam table and grab a quickie! It can make the wait less boring, but you do stand a chance of getting caught. Also, you may very well leave evidence – like semen – behind for the nurses to find when they flip the room for the next patient. You don’t want that noted in your chart!

In Your Neighbor’s Pool

Sex in the water is super fun, and it can feel extra naughty when you get busy in your neighbor’s pool while they’re gone. If you like the idea of possibly getting caught, plan to do it when they’ve gone off to the store or are just running errands. If you definitely don’t want to get caught (and if you want to turn your quickie into something more leisurely), choose a time that they’re on vacation or staying somewhere for a day or two and you know they won’t be back for quite some time.

Your Parent’s Bedroom

Bring back the feelings you had when you were a teenager and were trying to get some on the fly before your parents caught you by having sex in their bedroom. As an adult, you know you’re not going to get in trouble like you did when you were a kid, but getting caught can still be kind of embarrassing. For those who want a quickie but don’t want to risk the parents busting in, do it in their vacation house or while they’re not home.

On The Bathroom Floor (Yours Or Someone Else’s)

The bathroom floor is a great place for a quick romp, because it will make you feel sexy, dirty and a little raunchy! Even more so if you’re doing it in a public bathroom or at a friend’s house. Make sure the bathroom is clean though – either lay down a blanket of some kind or use standing sex positions.

In An Empty Bedroom Or Closet At A Friend’s Party

If you’re at a party and are feeling a little tipsy, your inhibitions are definitely down. It’s a perfect time to take advantage of your need to feel a little risque, so grab your partner and head to an empty bedroom or closet at a friend’s party. If it’s a wild party, you can pretty much guarantee that there are other people all over the house doing the exact same thing – just don’t be surprised if you walk in on another couple getting busy when you’re looking for a place to go yourself!

Doggy Style Looking Out Over An Observation Deck

Sometimes, you need a quickie with a view. If you live near a mountain or lake with some kind of observation deck, it can be an incredible place to get down on all fours and do it doggy style. The reason for doggy style sex here? So you can both take in the surroundings!

In The Empty Moving Van Before Returning It On Moving Day

You’ve finished moving, and you and your partner are completely exhausted – and exhilarated. You’re both covered in sweat and looking mighty fine – so why not throw down a blanket in the empty moving van and get busy? Sex or oral sex is great here – just leave the door cracked open so you can get out! You definitely don’t want to get locked in a moving van. Someone will eventually find you, but what are they going to think when they open the door and find you and your partner alone with nothing else in there?

In A Tanning Bed

Having sex in a tanning bed can be great fun, but there’s a few things to watch out for. Make sure that you and your partner’s combined weight don’t exceed the weight limit of the tanning bed. You don’t want to get busted by breaking the bed, and you’ll most likely be financially responsible for the damage. Also, limit it to a quickie, because you’ll end up with some funky tan lines if you stay in there longer than just a few minutes!

The Stairwell Of An Apartment Building

This is probably one of the best places to get busy on the fly. It has everything you need – good seating, handrails if you get really wild (or want to play with a little bondage), and privacy. Most people take the elevator in apartments, so if you sneak into the stairwell, you’re unlikely to get caught. It’s even less likely you’ll get caught if you pick a time where most everyone is in bed.

It Was Supposed To Be Just A Fling…Is It?

He Said/She Said with John & Jenna — Wed, 20 Jul 2011 23:00:16 +0000

Sex can be casual, or it can mean something more. What do you do if the sex wasn’t supposed to mean anything, but you start having romantic feelings?

There’s this hot guy and the office. He was a so hot, I couldn’t help myself…neither could he. We hang out, hook up, then show up at work like we can’t stand each other. It was strictly a “no strings” deal going in, but all I do is think about doing him. Am I developing feelings?

What She Said:

It sounds like you’re getting good sex, so congratulations are in order! And, given that you mentioned you’re thinking about sex all the time, it sounds like it’s the act you’re attached to – not the guy.

It reads like an ideal situation and you’re both doing everything “right.” You’ve agreed on the boundaries (you don’t spend the night and you don’t discuss it at work); as well as what kind of relationship you’d like (sex with no strings). I’m going to assume that birth control and safety from STD’s have also been discussed. An accidental pregnancy is a quick way to snafu non-attachment!

Women Naturally Develop Emotional Attachments

In broad biological terms, women are hardwired to get attached to men they sleep with – it’s released in our hormones when we mate, so there’s no getting around that reality. But there is a way to beat it. If you feel you’re falling for this guy, take a step back emotionally and physically. Journal, talk to yourself in front of the mirror, write “NO” on the back of your hand, splash cold water over your face – whatever it takes to wake up and remind yourself what you’re really getting out of this situation. You might think you’re falling in love with him, when you’re really only falling for his body.

What you’re getting out of this is valuable. Sex is a healthy and necessary part of life and it sounds like you have a good physical connection with this guy. You both knew what you wanted from the get-go, and there’s nothing wrong with that. Keep your priorities in check and treat each other with respect – you’ll be fine. If emotions are starting to surface, be honest and see what happens. In the meantime, enjoy!

What He Said:

Sounds like he just plain screwed you stupid. You got it so good, you don’t know up from down and all those orgasms have straight fried your brain. There’s nothing to be concerned about. It is, after all, called mind blowing sex for a reason. Give it time. Let the new-ness of the relationship wear off. After your body and mind have adapted to their worlds consistently being rocked by this guy, then you’ll know if it’s really more than just screwing for you.

Don’t Get Caught

Maybe it is, maybe it’s not. Time will tell. The most important thing to consider here is the workplace aspect. Never ever do it at work. Never talk dirty at work. Never send naughty emails via company email accounts. Channel your inner secret agent and you should be fine.

How To Use Poetry To Get A Girl (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Wed, 20 Jul 2011 14:00:40 +0000

Using seduction to snag a woman isn’t always easy – it takes a lot of thought and planning to be able to say and do the right things to get a woman interested in you. It doesn’t have to be difficult though, because women are hardwired to respond to certain things – it’s part of being a woman. If you think poetry is lame, think again! Here’s how you can use poems as part of your seduction maneuvers and have her falling all over you!

Click here to view the embedded video.

Are Poems Lame?

A lot of guys think that using poetry as part of their seduction tactics is lame. However, there’s a reason most guys think poems aren’t cool – they’re not hardwired to respond to poems like women are. From a guy’s point of view, poetry isn’t going to get you anywhere. Fortunately, you’re looking for things to make a woman swoon. So throw out all of your preconceived notions about poems! You can learn how to use a few simple lines of poetry to make a girl melt, almost guaranteed.

So does reciting poems and employing that old school romance make you look like a fool in front of women? Not hardly! When done the right way, it shows that you have enough strength and inner confidence to try something new and different. Guys who are too “manly” to get in touch with their romantic side like this aren’t going to get very far with the ladies. Using poems as part of your seduction techniques is what is going to make you stand out from the crowd – which is important if you really want the ladies to notice you!

Don’t Be The Guy She Thinks Would Use Poems

If you’re the wimpy, super romantic type of guy who uses poetry and no one is surprised by it, you’re not going to get a lot of women to notice you. To make this seduction tactic to work well for you, you actually have to be the kind of guy that no one would expect to use poems. You have to be very strong, confident and assertive. Be a little bit of a “manly man” on the outside, because that is what’s going to make it so surprising and incredible when you start breaking out the poems.

You want to show her the soft, sweet side of you, but you want to make her believe that she is the only one who gets to see that romantic side. If you’re sweet and romantic all the time, this isn’t going to be believable. To make this work well, you have to be strong enough on the inside to let the romantic side out of you and make yourself vulnerable to her. Really make her feel that she’s the only girl who gets to see this side of you.

Benefits Of Using Poetry

Not many guys are actually doing this. It’s a great way to stand out from the crowd and make yourself noticeable.
Girls love it. Women respond much better to language than anything else. By reciting poems to her, you’re actually speaking a “language” she can understand – which can be better than anything you can buy her or do for her to show her you’re into her. Language is key with women!
You’ll surprise her with that aspect of your personality and it will make you look like there’s more to you than meets the eye – which is extremely attractive to girls!

Don’t Overdo It

Just like with anything else, if you do it too much, it’s going to boring, monotonous and it’s going to get lame. You definitely don’t want to overdo it when it comes to using poems during seduction. If you do, she’ll love it at first, and then begin to get tired of it. She’ll want to see and experience something new and if you’re doing the same thing over and over again, she’ll look for that something “new” in someone else. Think of poetry as your secret seduction weapon that you save for just the right time and place, and you only use it occasionally. Mix it up with flirting and other tactics to keep her interested.

How To Come Up With The Right Poems

If you’re not very good with the written word, or struggle with writing good poetry, look online for some poems that you can recite to her instead. Don’t be afraid to take some creative license with a poem that is already written and make it your own. Make sure to choose a poem that is short and sweet – a long Shakespearean poem is going to bore both you and your partner by the third verse, unless you’re both really into Shakespeare. Remember to have fun with it and don’t make it too serious!

What To Do When Your Parents Hate Your Partner

Andrew Wang — Tue, 19 Jul 2011 23:00:33 +0000

Here’s a seemingly simple scenario. You love your parents and you love your significant other. It’s finally time for your mate and your family to meet. They get together and they absolutely love each other. Why shouldn’t they? You’re their common bond, and if you love all of them, why wouldn’t they love each other? Unfortunately, life isn’t always so simple.

Oftentimes the people that we love don’t get along together. If you’ve recently learned that your parents are incredibly displeased with your choice of a partner, you may very well be reeling. Do they see some horrible quality in your S.O. that you’ve been blind to? Or are they just being ridiculous in their own expectations for you?

Consider Major Negative Feedback

If they give you majorly negative feedback on your S.O., it’s worth considering it. They may have a really good reason for not liking your boyfriend or girlfriend. Maybe they know that he or she has cheated on you. You might be okay with that, but they aren’t. Maybe he/she was really rude to them and openly disrespectful of you in front of them. If these are the sort of complaints they’ve made to you, you should think really hard about why you’re with your mate.

They know you pretty well, and they may be right in thinking your S.O. is wrong for you. If their reasons for disliking your partner are miniscule or unfounded, however, don’t even bother considering a breakup. Instead, start thinking about how you’ll smooth things over between your parents and mate.

How To Get Them To Reconsider

The first step in getting them to reconsider their stance is to give them a great sales pitch on your S.O. Give them evidence to negate their fears, however irrational. Talk about all of the wonderful things that your partner does for you. Show your parents just how truly in love you are with this person. Prove to them that your significant other is a great source of happiness for you. It can even help to point out all the ways that they’re different from and better than past boyfriends or girlfriends that also met with your parent’s disapproval.

Once you’ve convinced them to give your partner a second chance, come up with a good way to get them together again. Make sure it’s in a setting that they will likely feel comfortable and happy in. Better still, work in a way for your S.O. to show off some of their better qualities. If they’re a great cook, the two of you can make dinner for your parents. If they are baseball nuts and so is your mate, go to a game together so they can talk shop and bond over a mutual interest. They may see your partner in a new, brighter light.

When The Issue Is More Serious

What if the problem is more irreparable, though? What if your parents are showing an ugly side to their personalities? Perhaps they’ve decided that they don’t like your partner because he or she is of a different race or religion from you. Maybe they think he or she is too poor or from the wrong class standing. You’re going to have to fight an uphill battle here, and you may not be able to win.

This is when you might have to make the hard choice to cut your parents out of your life, at least until they can be more accepting. It could be really difficult to do, but if you’re deeply in love with your S.O.—if they’re someone you may very well marry and/or have children with—you can’t give them up because they are being ridiculous. It’s a hard but important decision that you must make.

Hopefully, it won’t come to that. Remind them that if they love you and want you to be happy, they’ll respect your choice in a partner. Be patient and help them learn to accept your S.O. Sometimes time is the best bandage for a situation such as this.

Q&A: What Is The U-Spot? (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Tue, 19 Jul 2011 14:00:36 +0000

Sex tips can get boring – there’s only so many things you can do. If you feel like you and your partner have tried them all and are ready for something new, it can be difficult to discover another technique that you haven’t already done before. But what if you found a new trigger? An actual area of the female anatomy that has never been focused on before and will give her amazing orgasms? Meet the U-spot.

Click here to view the embedded video.

The U-Spot

Generally, when you’re referring to the U-spot, you’re actually referring to the Skene’s gland. This gland sits very close to a woman’s urethra and when stimulated, it produces copious amounts of female ejaculate – also known as squirting. This area is above the vaginal opening, but below the clitoris and slightly below the urethra.

The U-spot is extremely sensitive. Most of the time, it is indirectly stimulated during sex or oral sex, and rightly so – it’s so sensitive that the wrong touch could really be uncomfortable and turn a woman completely off. It’s really easy to go overboard when touching this area, so make sure your partner is well lubed and your touch is very, very gentle.

Stimulating The U-Spot With Fingering

You can touch and rub this area with your fingers, provided that your partner is already aroused and very lubed up. If she’s not wet enough for you to use her vaginal secretions to wet your fingers, make sure you have a good, water or silicone based lube on hand. Touching this area without lube is going to be terribly uncomfortable or painful for her!

Slide your finger down past your lover’s clitoris, stopping just underneath it. Your finger should be resting just above the opening to the vagina. Move the tip of your finger in small, circular motions, being very careful not to rub or press too hard.

Accessing This Area During Oral Sex

You can also stimulate the U-spot with your tongue during oral sex, which is actually a lot more comfortable and pleasurable for a woman. The tongue is wet and soft, so there’s less of a chance that you’ll rub her the wrong way. Again, slide your tongue past her clitoris and let it rest above the vaginal opening, moving it in small circles or back and forth. Switch between doing this and licking her clitoris to drive her absolutely wild!

Communication Is Essential

As with trying anything new during sex, it’s important to communicate with your partner and read their body language to tell if something that you’re doing is pleasurable to them or if you’re actually making them uncomfortable. While your lover might just tell you out loud that you’re doing it the wrong way, some women aren’t that outspoken about what they like and what they don’t like.

That’s why learning to read your lover’s body language is so important! If she doesn’t like what you’re doing, she’s going to pull away or avoid making any pleasurable sounds. If you’re in the dark though and you’re just not sure if she’s liking your moves, don’t be afraid to ask her if it’s good for her. If she seems like she’s not into it or if she tells you so, move on to a different technique.

She May Feel The Urge To Urinate

When you’re stimulating the U-spot the right way, your lover may feel the need to urinate. This is actually a good precursor to female ejaculation, so this may tell you that you’re on the right track. However, it’s always a good idea to make sure your partner uses the bathroom before getting started, so she can be reasonably confident that the sensation of having to pee is actually a pleasurable sensation of being on the verge of squirting.

Help Her Relax And Have Fun With It

Your lover isn’t going to find having her U-spot touched and fondled very pleasurable if she’s not relaxed first. It may be helpful to draw her a warm bath first, or take a shower together. Help her do whatever she needs to relax and get her mind off of the stresses of the day. Also, remember to have fun with it. Trying something new is supposed to be fun – so don’t get bent out of shape if it doesn’t work the first time or you’re unable to give your partner an orgasm this way. You can always try again later, in a slightly different way. Experiment with different techniques and enjoy the process!

How To Give A Signature Blowjob

Isabella Stone — Mon, 18 Jul 2011 23:00:43 +0000

A blowjob can be run of the mill, or it can be amazing. Here’s how to make the blowjob you give one to remember by developing your own signature style.

I love to give head: but it’s amazing when you can drop to your knees to perform a blowjob on a guy and truly rock his world. And I don’t mean in the ‘hooray my girlfriend is giving me head’ way; I mean in a way that will have him screaming, “Wow! That was AMAZING!” Well good news, this is what we’re going for!

Now whilst giving head to girls is often seen as a bit more of an art form; sometimes we can be a bit lazy when going down on guys. You may think that they’re happy with the same old in-out motion: but try these tricks and you’ll have them begging for more.

So listen up ladies (or men), and I’ll tell you how you can make your guy squirm with some advanced added extras to a basic oral sex position.

Choosing The Right Oral Sex Position

Get your guy to lie on his back (preferably erect) and kneel between his legs. Kneeling is better than lying, as if you spread your knees wide apart on the bed, and lean down to give him head, he’ll get a great view of your back and pert ass. Perfect for giving him a taster of what’s coming later.

Tips For Developing Your Own Blowjob Style

Make sure your hands are sufficiently lubricated with saliva (a lot of guys will like the sound of you spitting) or a good dose of lubricant. Silicone based lube is a particular favorite of mine, as it is deliciously viscous, and will make you sliding your hands up and down his shaft even easier.
Begin to massage, using your lead hand, up and down his shaft using a firm grip (the more lubricated he is the harder you can hold) and then lean over to take his penis in your mouth.
As you move up and down keep your mouth and lead hand at a rhythm. Try varying the pace: faster when you want to get him worked up to orgasm, mixed with slowing things down to help him keep going for longer.
As you get warmed up you’ll be able to take him deeper and deeper. Make sure to keep your mouth open wide: lots of guys will like you to be able to take them to the entrance to your throat. With a little practice this maneuver will help you to practice deep throat.
Now this is where most people would stop; instead go beyond the vanilla blow job and get bonus points for incorporating your other hand. As a first step you can use it to add extra pressure to the penis by holding one hand over the other.
Once you’ve got your balance, begin to move your hands independently. One hand can continue the up-down motion, whilst the other holds the base of his penis in a tight grip. Alternatively, you can use it to pleasure yourself, and give him a seductive side show. There are few things sexier than him watching you getting off whilst giving him head.
Feeling adventurous? Then insert the palm of your hand underneath his ball sack on the sensitive perineum (lots of lovely nerve endings there) and apply gently pressure by cupping the area of skin at the base of the penis. From here you can gently massage his balls with your hand… Yes at the same time as the other hand/ mouth perform fellatio!
Feeling really naughty (as I usually am)? Then swap to giving him a double handed jerk-off whilst you lick his balls. Start at his anus (I told you this was rude) and work up to his balls; sliding your tongue up the shaft of his penis, eventually returning to your original position.
Work out what really turns your guy on. Men have different preferences just like women. Get to know whether he enjoys saliva, sounds, licking (or even sniffing!) his balls and then combine his favorite moves to make him go wild.

Practice Makes Perfect

I’m not going to lie: putting these sexy twists on the classic blow job does require practice, determination and a good dose of enthusiasm for the job.

If you find giving a blowjob anything but thrilling, then getting him to thoroughly wash, shave and using flavoured lubricant will help to make your task more pleasurable. Personally, though I think there’s a lot of pleasure you can have knowing how much you can turn someone else on. Do this right and he’ll be so in awe of your multi-tasking womanly powers that he’ll claim it will feel like there are two women giving him oral sex at once, and not just one.

The result? A very happy man, and a whole lot of ‘I owe you’s!

How To Get Girls To Chase YOU (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Mon, 18 Jul 2011 14:00:29 +0000

Dating means looking high and low for a woman to ask out – right? Wrong! What if you could get into the dating scheme by having women go after YOU? Instead of being desperate for a date, you’ll actually have women coming your way, wanting to go out with you!

Click here to view the embedded video.

Give Her Space

For a girl to actually want to go after you, she has to actually have room to go after you. If smothering her with attention and asking her out on dates all the time, she’s going to get sick of you being in her space and she’s going to start running. A girl who feels smothered or trapped isn’t going to want to go after you at all – she’ll be wanting to get away from you at every possible turn. At first, this is just because she needs to “breathe” – it doesn’t mean that she doesn’t like you anymore. However, if you continue to smother her and stay in her space without giving her a chance to recoup, she’s going to try to get away – and stay away.

Let her develop her own life. In fact, encourage it! Make sure she spends time with her friends and you spend time with yours. Have a life outside of your friendship or relationship and make sure she does too. By giving her space, you’re ensuring that she has time to think about you and miss you – after which, she’ll start to go after you!

Let The Attraction Unfold Naturally

This is perhaps one of the most important parts of dating and getting a woman to want to go after you instead of the other way around. Far too many guys “try” too hard to win a woman’s attention and affection, which really has the opposite effect. She’s not going to be very attracted when you’re constantly in her space.

Attraction doesn’t often happen instantly – it’s something that needs to grow over time. When a man tries too hard, he stifles that natural process. The woman he’s interested in is so busy trying to get away that there’s no time for that attraction and sexual tension to develop. Enjoy being together, but don’t start out with high expectations of where the friendship is going to go or if you’re going to get into a monogamous, serious relationship any time soon. Instead, learn to enjoy the moments you have together and let nature take it’s course!

Dating Isn’t The Same As It Used To Be

Women aren’t sitting around anymore waiting for a guy to ask them out. In fact, it’s quite a bit different from the “days of old.” Women hold a lot of power in the dating scene and they’re often the ones who call the shots. The ratio of available guys to women are a bit skewed these days – about 5% of the single male population are the ones getting all the girls, and the other 95% is wondering what happened!

How To Be In The 5%

Look around and take note of all the guys out there that are getting women. What are they doing? How do they dress? How do they act? What are they saying? Chances are, they’re not offering up some cheesy pick up lines. What you’ll notice is that these guys appear strong, confident and independent to the women around them.

They have a life of their own, they have passions and they carry themselves with an aura of confidence and high self esteem. Does that mean you have to be cocky to get women to want to go out with you? Not hardly. But if you’re a wimp who is always asking “permission” for things or apologizing for things, you’re not going to get very far at all.

Learn to be that strong, confident guy. Learn to like yourself for who you are and be yourself when you go into the dating scene. You have something of value to offer – now you just have to believe it.

Develop A Magnetic Personality

For women to approach you, you’ve got to put yourself out there. Be someone who is magnetic, flirtatious, charming and really fun to be around. Have that core inner strength and happiness that radiates outward to other people. This is probably the number one piece of dating advice – if you don’t do anything else, do this. Having a personality that people want to be around is the first step to attracting friends and getting women to go after you – instead of you always having to ask them out!

Let Her Touch Your Most Sensitive Spot – And Win Her For Good

Michael Webb — Sun, 17 Jul 2011 23:00:47 +0000

The prostate is one of the most sensitive parts on a man. By letting your girl finger your prostate, she’ll blow your mind – and want to do it over and over!

How Adventurous Are You?

Most men would say “Adventure is my middle name” and “absolutely” with utmost confidence when it comes to sexual intercourse and experimenting with sex positions thanks to PORN and the Kama Sutra.

Women would and answer “it depends on my mood” to both questions. Get the hint? No? Are you retarded or something? Oh man! She needs motivation you dork!

Satisfying a woman entails a lot of time spent on initiating foreplay until her batteries are all charged up and her libido spiking up to the maximum level. I don’t mean just mediocre foreplay and hard slapping and pounding sexual intercourse after dude! It has to give her a very electrifying, explosive, intense and invigorating and masterfully orgasmic experience prior to getting your Jerky, Johnson, Willy, Junior or whatever you call your penis spit-fully satisfied inside her sweet, wet, warm vagina.

Men treat foreplay as just a waste of time and are oh so eager to just get it on. What most men don’t understand is that women who get enough foreplay can go the distance of attempting what only a handful of women would do for their man – and that is, to stimulate the male G-spot.

What Is The Male G-Spot?

“Eeewww!”, “You want me to do what???,”Yuck!”, ”That’s so disgusting! Are you gay?” – Typical reaction of women, who are deprived of enough foreplay, asked or, since we’re talking about sensitive and emotional women, I should say “requested” to stimulate the male G-spot.

For those of you who are clueless about what the hell I’m talking about, brace yourselves – get a cup of coffee, a cigarette, a bottle of beer or anything that could keep you glued to reading what I intend to reveal to the less fortunate ones.

Alright, the male G-spot is the prostate gland and not the head of your penis or your balls. It is located and can be stimulated from the anus. Yup! Don’t blame or question God for engineering it that way. There is a reason for its anatomical position. It is there because it is situated close to the so-called ejaculatory ducts. The term ejaculatory ducts are quite self-explanatory isn’t it? Get the logic?

Getting Her To Do It

This may be such a turn-off but if you give women the pampering and satisfaction she yearns and needs during foreplay, she will go the distance of allowing you to lay on your back with your legs spread apart like when a woman is about to give birth and best achieved when a pillow us under your hips aiding elevation and giving the appropriate angle. Applying pressure on the perineum or the surface of your anus would prep you up.

Stimulating the male G-spot or the prostate gland that resembles the shape of a chestnut requires gentle probing using the middle finger initially, to about 2 inches inside the anus. And the crowd went wild! Geez! Ever heard of a LUBRICANT you chicken? Your partner can make it even more interesting and exhilarating when coupled with fellatio while probing and applying different levels of pressure and intensity on your G-spot.

Trust this soon-to-be sex guru – after such an experience you would surely need to take a very cold shower to keep the conflagration under control because it is definitely illuminatingly hot when a woman does this to you in exchange for treating her like a queen during foreplay.

Auto Fellatio – Can Men Give Themselves A Blowjob? (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Sun, 17 Jul 2011 14:00:02 +0000

Auto fellatio may be something you’ve heard of – but then again, it’s fairly rare. Most often, auto fellatio crops up in fetish porn, but the term refers to the act of a man giving himself oral sex. Guys who are able to do this may enjoy giving themselves oral sex during masturbation. It seems impossible that a man can lick his own penis – but can guys really give a blowjob to THEMSELVES?

Click here to view the embedded video.

What Is Auto Fellatio?

Auto fellatio is defined as the act of a man giving himself oral sex and licking his own penis as a form of masturbation. This may include manual masturbation or may just involve the mouth only. It may sound impossible for a man to do this, and the truth is, most guys can’t. However, if a man has a particularly large penis size or is very flexible, it is possible that it can be done.

Similarly, auto cunnilingus is where a woman bends forward and gives herself oral sex. However, it is much more difficult for a woman to give herself oral sex than it is for a man to give himself a blowjob. This is because women have a little farther to go to get their mouths in contact with their genitals. Although it is very rare to see either gender give themselves oral sex, it is far less common among women simply because it’s physically more difficult to do so.

Can Guys Really Stretch That Much?

The far majority of guys cannot stretch far enough down to actually get their mouth on the head of their penis. You have to be extremely flexible and fit to be able to do it! It is very difficult to actually stretch that much, and it is often painful or uncomfortable. It can cause muscles to pull and tear, because the body has to be in such an extreme position for auto fellatio to take place. Usually, guys who are able to perform auto fellatio have experience in gymnastics or have some type of gymnastics training. Another way this can be achieved is by having someone help push the body and head forward towards the penis.

The truth is, however, that even guys who are able to perform auto fellatio cannot go all the way down on their penises. Most of the time, the mouth can only reach the head of the penis or the top of the shaft. It is very rare for a man to be able to stretch enough to get his entire penis in his mouth. For this reason, it is common for men to masturbate with their hand and stroke the shaft of their penis while performing auto fellatio. This is because they can only lick and suck the head of their penis, so they complement it with the movement of their hand on the shaft.

Can Auto Fellatio Be Learned?

While having a background in gymnastics or having exceptional flexibility is helpful when it comes to being able to perform oral sex on yourself, this activity can be learned. Even if you’ve never been very flexible before, you can learn to stretch your body into a position that makes it possible for you to connect your mouth with your genitals. It will definitely take time and patience to learn, and it’s not something that you’re going to be able to do overnight. You will need to practice stretching daily, going a little further each time.

You can also do this up against the wall for better stability. The wall allows you to lean your lower back against it and angle your penis closer to your mouth. Be aware that auto fellatio is not something that the body was naturally built to do – go slow and if you experience any pain, stop immediately! It’s easy to pull or tear muscles when stretching your body to such an extreme.

Is Ingesting Semen Harmful?

Many guys wonder what their own semen tastes like – and if ingesting it is harmful in any way. It’s not – in fact, women do it all the time! However, if the idea of tasting your own semen (or ejaculating in your own face) turns you off, auto fellatio is probably not something you want to try. It’s unlikely you’d be able to get out of the awkward position you put yourself in quickly enough to avoid ejaculating in your mouth or on your face. While the ability to “suck yourself off” sounds neat, it’s more of a novelty than anything else. You’re going to get much more pleasure from masturbation or a blowjob from your partner.

Dating Tips: Is It OK To Ask For A Phone Number At Work? (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Sat, 16 Jul 2011 14:44:41 +0000

Dating requires you to ask a woman out first – but how do you get a woman’s number? She may be a co-worker of yours, or you may see her often if she works at a place you frequent. You’d really like to be dating this girl, but is it okay to approach women at work?

Question: Hi Dan and Jenn. I’m a new subscriber. I’ve watched a few of your videos so far but haven’t found one that answers my specific question. I was wondering if it’s okay to ask for a womens number while they’re working? The specific place I’m curious about is Subway. I’ve heard it’s not kosher to do this. Thanks in advance and I hope to learn a lot!

–YouTube Viewer

Click here to view the embedded video.

Dating Won’t Happen Unless You Ask First

The first thing that guys have to understand about the dating process is that it’s probably not going to happen unless YOU do the asking. So you’re pretty much guaranteed a “no” if you don’t ask a woman out. So gather up your courage, and get ready to make the first move!

If You Share A Workplace

When most guys think about asking a girl out at work, it usually means he’s romantically interested in a woman that he is employed with. Generally speaking, this is almost always a bad idea! If you get involved in a relationship with someone you are employed with and things end badly, it can definitely make for quite an awkward situation later. Also, some companies have strict policies against dating at work, and it could cause you to lose your job. It might also end well, so you never know until you try. Just be aware that you’re taking a risk when you consider dating someone that you’re employed with.

At Your Potential Date’s Workplace

The situation is a little different when you talk about how to approach women at their place of business. For example, if the woman you’re interested in works at a restaurant or a hotel that you frequent, there’s no reason not to ask her out there. However, there are some rules that you want to follow if you’re thinking about approaching a woman where she works to ask her out on a date.

Do Not Go At Peak Hours

Every place of business has peak hours, especially restaurants. Never try to ask a woman out at a time where she’s slammed with customers, the boss is watching or she is too busy with other things. This will get you brushed off immediately, even though she may actually be interested in dating you. Timing is everything in this type of situation and if you do it at the wrong time, you’re just not going to get anywhere. Wait until she’s not busy with customers or other things, so she actually has time to process what you’re saying.

Make Sure You’re Able To Get One On One Time

This really goes for when you ask anyone anything – you really want to be one one one with that person, rather than having a bunch of other people listening in on the conversation you’re trying to have. Have the confidence to approach the girl you like when she’s alone.

Establish A Vibe

Going up to a woman you like and asking for a phone number right off the bat probably isn’t going to end well, even if you are one on one with her and no one else is watching or listening. So start flirting with her a little first. Smile at her, joke a little and make eye contact. Establish a connection or vibe first, before you suggest taking her out on a date. It’s more likely that she’ll be interested in dating you if you flirt a little first.

If She Rejects You

Depending on how you’ve set things up (and whether she’s really interested in you or not), you may very well get rejected. Don’t take it personally, especially if you’ve approached her at a bad time. You can always try again at another time. However, if she turns down your dating offer more than once, it’s safe to say that it’s not your timing that is the issue here. Remember that dating is all about having fun and meeting new people – so if you strike out more than once with one particular woman, remember that there are more out there that you could have an even better connection with. Don’t assume that if this one rejects you that it’s all over – because it’s not!

How To Turn Dating Your Crush Into Reality (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Sat, 16 Jul 2011 14:00:24 +0000

If dating the woman you really like seems out of reach, think again. With a few simple dating tips, you can make getting the girl you’ve had your eye on for awhile into something more than just a dream. Here’s how you can make dating the girl you like REAL, instead of just a fantasy!

Click here to view the embedded video.

Let Her Know That You Exist

If you really like a woman, nothing is going to happen – ever – if she doesn’t know that you even exist. Bite the bullet, go up to the girl you like and introduce yourself! She’s never going to know who you are if you don’t introduce yourself, and of course, if she doesn’t know who you are, how can you date her?

Get To Know The Woman You Like

Most guys (and gals) that like someone end up fantasizing about who this woman is, what they like and what they don’t like. In reality, however, there’s no way to actually know what this woman is like without really getting to know them. So after you introduce yourself to the girl you like, take the time to get to know her. Talk to her, find out what her interests and disinterests are, as well as what passions drive her.

This will do one of two things – you’ll either get to know her and figure out that you don’t like who she really is and that you’d rather not start dating her, or you’ll like her even more than you already did. Just don’t assume that because you like this woman that you know everything there is to know about them – because your imagination is actually what fills in a lot of the blanks. You may think that you know something about a person, when in all actuality, your imagination came up with that particular characteristic.

How To Get The Woman You Like To Want To Start Dating YOU

To attract women, whether you like them or not, you have to be the kind of guy that attracts women. Be a strong, confident guy who has passions and a drive in life. Learn to love yourself and be happy about where your life is going, so you can then radiate that happiness and confidence outward to other people. THIS is what women are attracted to! They’re not interested in weak, wimpy guys that are desperate to get a girl. In fact, quite the opposite. They want to be dating a guy who is confident in himself, and is happy and fun to be around.

Be positive, optimistic and enthusiastic
Enjoy social situations and meeting new people
Be a part of the “fun” crowd
Have goals in life
Know where you are and where you want to be in life
Be fun to hang out with
Know how to have a great conversation

Access The Emotions That Make Her Addicted To Being Around You

A woman will remember you depending on the way you make her feel. If you don’t make her feel good, all the dating tips in the world aren’t going to help you. She’s either not going to remember you at all or you’ll leave her with a bad memory – which is the exact opposite of what you want to do! Instead, focus on making her feel great when she’s around you.

Have a good time with her
Make her feel incredibly sexy and beautiful
Do interesting, fun, exciting and memorable things together
Show that you’re interested in who she is
Pay attention and listen to her

Never Change Who You Are For A Girl

Remember to never change who you are for a girl. Learn to love yourself for who you are and allow that to shine through – never change yourself to act the way a particular girl wants you to act or look the way a girl wants you to look. Changing who you are to impress someone else is going to do nothing but make you look lame – and the woman you may actually want to be with might see this and count you out because you’re too wishy washy and don’t have that self-confidence.

If the girl you’re interested in isn’t responding well to your dating efforts, let it go. It may not be a good fit, and if you keep trying to make it work with someone it’s obviously not going to work with, you’re going to be making yourself unavailable for the right woman that might come along. If you have that self confidence, you’re going to be able to let it go and move on to another girl who will appreciate you for who you are.

How To Host A Swingers Party

Michael Andrews — Fri, 15 Jul 2011 23:00:19 +0000

Many people like the thought of going to a swingers party. It’s certainly a little bit different to your average social gathering! They can be great fun and the place where many fantasies are acted out. But rather than wait around and hope you get invited to one, why not host your own? It’s not actually as difficult as you might think. Here are a few tips to help you create a memorable event.

What Kind Of Party Do You Want To Host?

Decide how many people you want to be there. Do you want it to be a large party or an intimate gathering? Do you want it to be just for couples or do you want to invite single people (men and/or women) as well? Most swingers prefer to go to parties that are mainly (if not totally) for couples and single women only. You will find a lot of single men will be interested but it does create a different atmosphere.

Decide On A Venue

Most people would think of their home, but it needn’t be the only place to host a party. If your place isn’t suitable or large enough, you could ask one of the other guests if they would be willing to host it. A hotel room is a good choice if the numbers aren’t going to be too great, but another alternative is a local swingers club. You could arrange for your group to all meet there.

Work Out The Guest List

Unless you already know a lot of swingers, by far the easiest way to find your guests is online. Set up a profile on a swingers website and list your event there. Then you can begin to contact other couples in your area who you think might be suitable.

Meet Everyone First

Insist on meeting everyone first. If your party is couples only you will be amazed how many single men will try to get an invitation by masquerading as a couple online. When they arrive at the party they will make an excuse for being alone such as “the wife is sick.” Insist you meet the couple first, or at least talk to them on the phone – both of them – to ensure they’re for real and who they say they are.

Charge An Entry Fee

A small charge, paid to you in advance, is a great way to ensure people actually show up, as well as helping towards your hosting costs. People know there is a cost involved in hosting a party so they won’t mind contributing.

Forget Party Snacks – Have Lube And Condoms Available

It is normal for the host to provide condoms and lube, although you can also ask people also to bring their own. You might want to ask people (discreetly) if they have an allergy to latex and ensure some latex-free condoms are available.

Remember To Have Fun!

Obviously this is the point of the party in the first place. However, to achieve this the most important thing to communicate to your guests is that no one is under any pressure to participate or do anything they are not totally comfortable with. Even if you have met the guests beforehand, there is no guarantee people will click in a way that makes them want to take things to a sexual level.

Hosting a swingers party does take a bit of effort and time to organize but the results can be well worth it. Even if it doesn’t turn into an all-out orgy you may still make some new friends. There are many more people wanting to attend a party than are willing to organize one so your efforts will be well appreciated.

Low Sex Drive – How Can A Woman Get Her Libido Back? (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Fri, 15 Jul 2011 14:00:42 +0000

The libido changes in lots of ways throughout life, for both men and women. A low sex drive can mean a lot of things for a woman, especially after giving birth. Here’s how to figure out why she has a low libido and how to revv up your partner’s libido again after the baby is born.

Question: My question is, since my wife gave birth 18 months ago she is never in the mood, EVER. Now I work midnights and take care of the baby during the day to save on daycare costs. During that time at home, I cook, I clean, I do laundry and of course take care of the baby. I do this because I know her job is stressful and she works hard and the last thing she wants to do when she comes home is cook and clean. I thought all of that might help, but it didn’t. How can I help her get her get her libido back??? Thanks for the help!

–YouTube Viewer

Click here to view the embedded video.

Why A Woman’s Libido Might Change

There are a million different reasons a girl might experience a change in your lover’s libido, whether it’s a decrease or an increase. Usually it boils down to hormones. Throughout a female’s life, the levels of hormones in the body, such as estrogen, differs greatly. She may have a rampant sex drive at a younger age, only to experience a drastic decrease in libido during the aging process and the levels of hormones in the body begin to change. This is especially true right after giving birth. The good majority of the time a female experiences a change in libido, a change in hormones is what is responsible.

Communication Is Key

Make sure that you actually have an open line of communication with your partner about what is going on in your relationship, especially when it comes to sex – or the lack of it. Your partner may have no clue how you feel about the situation if you’re not talking to her – so make sure you’re actually communicating about what is happening.

Physical Reasons A Female’s Sex Drive Can Decrease

If your partner just isn’t feeling good and isn’t feeling like having sex, it may be time to make an appointment with her doctor. There are several purely physical reasons that a girl might experience a decrease in libido, such as:

Changes in hormones
Having a baby, especially if it was a difficult birth
Significant weight gain
Taking certain medications, especially anti-depressants and anti-psychotics

Emotional Causes For A Reduced Libido

Aside from physical factors, there are also lots of emotional factors that you need to consider when trying to find the root of a female’s lack of libido.

Being tired or exhausted from work or taking care of kids
Lack of time together as a couple
Lack of emotional connection
Lack of confidence and feeling unattractive, especially after having a baby or gaining weight
Depression or anxiety

A Word On Postpartum Depression

Postpartum depression is a serious issue that can happen after a girl has a baby, but it can be difficult to spot, since it’s normal for women to feel a little down after giving birth – this is most commonly referred to as the “baby blues.” However, when it becomes serious, it can be dangerous to leave it untreated. If you suspect that your partner may have postpartum depression, don’t judge or criticize. Show your partner love and support, but make sure to see a doctor immediately. Serious postpartum depression can cause a woman to harm herself or the baby, which never ends well. Symptoms of postpartum depression can include:

Lower libido than before the baby
Loss of appetite
Insomnia
Intense irritability and anger
Overwhelming fatigue
Lack of joy in life
Feelings of shame, guilt or inadequacy
Severe mood swings
Difficulty bonding with the baby
Withdrawal from family and friends
Thoughts of harming herself or the baby

What You Can Do To Fire Up The Libido

If you’ve ruled out some of the more serious reasons that your partner might be experiencing a decrease in libido there are a few things you can do to try to get that spark back into your sex life.

Plan A Date Night

Often, after having a baby, everything becomes all about taking care of the baby. There’s very little time left for you and your partner to actually spend time together away from the baby and reconnect. You need to remember why you’re a couple in the first place! The baby will be just fine with a babysitter or grandma and grandpa while you and your partner go on a date. Stay in touch, but remember that you need to take some time for the two of you.

One of the most important aspects of planning a date night is that a girl doesn’t usually have the opportunity to dress up, do her hair, put on makeup and go somewhere when she’s a full time mother – especially if there’s a full time job involved. Giving your partner the opportunity to feel like a woman again can work wonders!

Romance Your Partner

You may just be missing that element of romance that used to exist in your relationship but doesn’t anymore. Most of a female’s arousal is actually mental, and for a girl to feel sexual, she must be completely relaxed. Draw a nice bubble bath and pour your partner a glass of wine (if the baby isn’t nursing). Give your partner a massage, or buy a gift certificate so she can go get one.

Focus Your Attention On Your Partner

Remember that for a woman to feel important to you and valued by you (which is necessary for a lady to want to be come sexual with you), she has to feel like you’re paying attention to her and value what she has to say. Talk to your partner one on one, with the television off. Ask questions about how she feels and what she thinks, and then actually listen to the answers!

When You Do Have Sex

When you and your partner actually do have sex, it’s very important that you focus on her pleasure – and make sure your lover has an orgasm too! Worship your lover’s body and make her feel sexy in the way you touch and look at her. Give your partner oral sex and let her have an orgasm first, and even more than once if you can!

If She’s Having Trouble Reaching Orgasm

Many women have trouble reaching orgasm, especially after having a baby. After giving birth, things may be a little sore, or may just feel a little different down there. Don’t be afraid to bring in some props like arousal gel or warming lube. Of course, lube is especially crucial for sex after having a baby, because you can really hurt the sensitive tissues down there if the vagina is dry – which is more likely after giving birth.

3 Ways Pocket Vibrators Will Blow Your Mind!

Isabella Stone — Thu, 14 Jul 2011 23:00:59 +0000

Sex toys don’t have to be huge to get you off. Large sex toys often aren’t practical – they can be heavy and cumbersome to use, difficult to travel with and may use a lot of batteries or require plugging in to a wall outlet to operate. Often, better orgasms come in small packages! Here are three ways small vibrators will rock your world!

As a woman that likes to have things on demand (my favorite movies recorded, microwave meals in my fridge) I love to have a toy that is as instantly practical as it is tingly. Gyrating rabbits, and dildos that resemble the Incredible Hulk’s forearm, are all well and good for being stowed away at home; but are not the easiest of items to sneak away for a dirty weekend, or keep in your handbag.

Pocket-sized vibrators are the latest weapon in your arousal arsenal that will help you, and maybe a lucky male partner, enjoy naughty games on the go.

Hide It

As a ‘modern woman’ I reserve the right to masturbate at the office, the gym, or on my way to my boyfriend’s apartment; problem is all of those bright pink, spikey vibrators aren’t the easiest things to just ‘tuck away’ in the pocket of your handbag.

Pocket vibrators however, often come craftily disguised though as an unassuming article: there are the ‘butter fingers’ that look (ok, not that convincingly) like a candy bar; and then there are the ‘ lipstick vibe’s’. These small vibrators are sneakily shaped like a common place lipstick but conceal a naughty secret. Whether you’re more likely to have a candy bar or a lipstick in your handbag; there are pocket vibrators out there with enough stealth to make it through security at the airport; or your mother-in-law glaring into the contents of your carry on.

Play With It

Every girl should have a bullet!

These little devils are often only the size of the tip of your thumb but pack a punch. When inserted onto your clitoris they can vibrate so specifically that you’ll shudder more than with larger (and clumsier) vibrators.

Remote bullets are probably your best bet for fun and games with a deviant other half. Give your (lucky) boyfriend the remote control to adjust the speed and frequency of your vibrations; and then just pop the bullet into your panties. You can make this part of your normal foreplay routine; but I think it’s best to play some games instead.

If he wants to watch the football when you want some attention; get him to control your vibrations ‘remotely’ from the couch as you relax on your bed. Who knows he may even realize it would make great sense to join you during the commercial break!

In fact with a bullet you can forget ever having to have him cry ‘honey, dinner!!’ and get him to ‘buzz’ you instead.

Vary It

Bullets also come in a few other varieties. Some of them are not remotely controlled but instead there is a cable that connects the bullet to the remote; much like you might have seen with vibrating cock rings. Something about wires is distinctly ‘unsexy’. However, if you’re using a bullet during sex to stimulate your clitoris it does stop the two small parts becoming separated: let’s face it, it would be a tragedy that if in the heat of the moment you lost the remote to your favorite toy down the side of your bed!

Durex’s bullet variant is a slightly stranger design. The ‘play touch finger’ resembles those fake ‘witch fingers’ that you once cracked out as a kid over Halloween before you went trick or treating. Its design means that a soft rubber ‘finger’ slides over your own index finger, on the end of which is a bullet.

The bullets themselves are individually battery operated which means that they pack a punch. However, whatever genius worked out that Durex’s pocket vibrator design gave the most “Kapow” was severely let down by a designer who failed to realize that masturbating with a huge, synthetic finger puppet is just plain weird.

Boost It

The ‘play touch finger’ is also something I’d be too chronically embarrassed to pull out in front of a partner (though it feels so good I could probably overlook its ugliness when I’m alone… and blindfolded). So it misses out the best use of pocket vibrators; that they add spice to your sex life, without making your partner feel seconded to seven inches of silicone.

If you’re new into your relationship and don’t know how your other half feels about sex toys, these discreet little weapons will allow you to introduce some more buzz to the bedroom without referencing ‘Crocodile Dundee’, “You call that a vibrator? THIS is a vibrator!”

Pocket sized vibrators can be chucked casually into your over night bag and brought out at the crucial moment to ensure your orgasm. The clitoris is notoriously hard to stimulate during missionary (unless someone’s hand can be taken away from balance to be put down there). But the bullet is much smaller than your frenzied fingers and can slot comfortably between you and your partner as he penetrates you.

These ‘magic’ bullets are then well worth adding to, or beginning, your sex toy collection. In fact if you’re a woman who likes her orgasms clitoral, they’re invaluable.

And if you’re a forward thinking man who likes to please women, or want to know how to really tease a girl in a club, then they’re not only small enough to fit in a handbag: but can be slotted into a wallet too.

Advanced Kissing Tips (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Thu, 14 Jul 2011 14:00:05 +0000

Kissing is something you may think is basic, but you can create amazing sexual tension just by putting your mouth on hers – the right way. If you think you’ve mastered kissing tips and know everything there is to know about it, think again! Here’s how you can blow your lover’s mind and take it to the next level.

Click here to view the embedded video.

Take The Next Step In Kissing

Learn how to be both gentle and firm at the same time. Many guys think that they have to be either super soft or really wild, when the best kisses come from guys who know how to be both at the same time. Kiss your lover with a little bit of an urgency, like you have to do it right now. Start off a little firm to show your passion, then relax into softer, sweeter moves to convey how much you’re enjoying it.

Start integrating eye contact when kissing. Eye contact is one of the most powerful forms of body language, and it’s incredibly effective when used with a woman. Pull away for a few seconds while making out with your partner and gaze deeply into her eyes. Hold the eye contact for just a few seconds longer than is comfortable, and then go back to kissing.

Enjoy each step of kissing your partner. Don’t rush through it so you can have sex sooner, and don’t just kiss her for the sake of having sex with her. Make the an incredible activity all by itself, and if you don’t end up having sex afterwards, so be it. The kiss was great, after all!

Girls Like Variety

Learn a variety of kissing tips and techniques. Girls don’t necessarily like to do the same thing with a guy over and over – it gets old after awhile. Take some time to learn a variety of techniques, so you have something new to offer your partner every now and then. Experiment with new things and find out what works for you and your lover and what doesn’t!

Move around while kissing. Don’t just stay on her mouth the whole time – slide your lips down her neck and kiss her gently there, or gently nibble on her ear. Staying in one spot will not only make her mouth tired quickly, it’s also going to get boring pretty fast.

Make it a kiss to remember. Make it slow, soft, sensual and special. If you don’t end up having sex that night, make it so that she thinks about the kiss all night long and that’s all she has running through her mind.

Tease her. Remember that kissing is part of foreplay and you will create a ton of sexual tension if you tease your lover and make her want more. You don’t want to be the guy that overwhelms her and leaves her pulling away, gasping for breath. Always pull away first and make her want to come back for more.

The Importance Of Touch While Kissing

Touch her hair when you kiss. Start with a gentle caress and as you get more and more passionate, it can even progress into a light tug. The nerves in the scalp are extremely sensitive, and playing with her hair while you kiss or tugging it gently can send shivers down her spine.

When it feels right, run your hands over her body. Don’t assume that touching her body means going straight for her breasts or vagina! Run your hands over her arms, touch her cheek softly and gently caress her neck. Put your hand on her hip and draw her closer to you. Touch her in places that she wouldn’t expect a guy to touch – because let’s face it, she’s probably expecting you to head for her nether regions anyways.

Being Kissable

Make sure your lips and mouth aren’t too dry. Your lips should be soft and kissable, but also make sure that your lips and mouth aren’t too wet either. You definitely don’t want to go into a kiss with slippery, slimy lips and tongue.

Practice good oral hygiene – you may think this falls into the category of basic kissing tips, but you wouldn’t believe how many guys expect to kiss a girl right after they’ve had a plate of hot wings and a beer. Don’t do this! Freshen up before you move in. If you have to excuse yourself to the bathroom to get fresh, go for it. Brush your teeth, use lip balm and carry mints. Make sure that you’re fresh and ready to be kissed. She’ll not only appreciate it, but the kiss will be a lot better.

Top 5 Reasons Not To Cheat

He Said/She Said with John & Jenna — Wed, 13 Jul 2011 23:00:07 +0000

Cheating is almost never a good idea – here are 5 great reasons to avoid cheating on your partner.

What She Said:

I want to honor my vows. “For better or worse” is what I agreed to – and staying faithful means things will stay on “the better” end of the spectrum.
The kids. I don’t have ‘em, but I know a lot of couples that choose to act on the up and up – for themselves as much as an example for their children.
It should be number one, but my favorite reason is simple: love. My husband is my best friend; I’d never do anything to hurt him.
The grass is not always greener! Sure, it’s nice to daydream about that hunk giving you the eye at the grocery store – but he probably isn’t any better than what you have at home. And at least you’ve got that one trained!
Lying corrodes the soul. A good marriage is based on mutual admiration and respect, not deceit.

You don’t have to be married to honor vows. If you’ve agreed, as a couple, to be monogamous that’s enough to remove you from the market.

Monogamy Doesn’t Have To Be Boring

Monogamy doesn’t have to spell monotony. Bet you haven’t heard that one before, but it’s true! Think of ways to keep it hot with the one you’ve already got. Fantasizing is allowed – getting on with Brad Pitt in your mind can be satisfying and save your marriage. A win/win!

Trust & Intimacy Is Rewarding

Building intimacy in the long-term is a great challenge – and a great reward. It takes time to develop. Flirtation is fleeting, but a deep bond can last the rest of your life. Before you think about stepping out of your committed relationship, take a moment to think of the consequences. Trust can be a fragile thing, and once it’s broken it can be difficult to repair. Take stock of what you’ve got.

What He Said:

It’s called technology. It will fuck you, and not in a fun way. Anything you do online is recorded, somewhere. It’s usually not an issue, but when infidelity happens, it’s easier to prove and to nail your ass with.
It’s called the Internet. If you cheat and you piss off your significant other, they can and often will smear your ass all over the Internet. That means any sexy videos or photos you’ve taken, any naughty text messages, anything that can make you look bad to a perspective employer will be put online and will be easily found by perspective employers (who are looking for that kind of thing. Perverts).
The juice is almost always not worth the squeeze. Assuming that you cheat with someone and that sex is the greatest sex ever had in human history, it will still not be worth the hell your fidelity will put all parties through. Your other half is going to rip you a new one, over the course of several years, and then the legal system will reopen those still healing wounds and rip an additional one into the one he/she just ripped into you. It’s not worth it, even if you have some crazy, Justin Timberlake on tour sex.
The Chris Rock rule. Many people violate, what I call “The Chris Rock Rule of Infidelity” which states: the person you cheat on your partner with must be as hot or hotter than your partner. If you bang someone way hotter than your partner, well, at least they can understand on some level. You had a chance with someone way out of your league and you took it. They will be hurt, but they won’t be mad. If you just bang some skank who happens to be willing to do things your partner won’t, well, that’s your ass. She will be way pissed because you banged someone lower on the quality scale than you have waiting for you at home. If you do this, you are an idiot.
Fantasy is not usually the reality. Say you’re a 40 something guy and some hot 19 year old is all up on you and wants it. Bad. Do you really think it will be as good as you imagine? Sure, she’s hot and young, but she’s also young and crazy. She’s going to go apeshit when it’s just sex for you, and even if she doesn’t, it probably won’t live up to your fantasy. How Could it?

3 Sex Tips For Men With A Big Penis (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Wed, 13 Jul 2011 14:00:49 +0000

A big penis doesn’t guarantee you’re a sex master. In fact, without good planning and techniques, you can actually hurt your partner with your big penis. Don’t assume that because you’ve got it going on down there that you’re going to be able to rock every woman’s world. Check out these great sex tips for guys who are exceptionally well endowed.

Click here to view the embedded video.

Focus On Foreplay

Foreplay is probably the number one thing that guys with a big penis forget about. A lot of well endowed men think that just because they are…well, well endowed that they can please their female partners with their penises alone. This couldn’t be farther from the truth! In fact, without enough foreplay to get a woman really wet and aroused, a big penis could definitely hurt her.

To accommodate a large penis, a woman has to be aroused and well lubricated. If she’s not aroused, she’s not only going to be somewhat dry down there, it’s also going to be more difficult for her to stretch to take in every inch of you. A woman’s vagina doubles in length when she is aroused, so it’s extremely important to use foreplay before intercourse to make sure she is ready to take you in.

Take Your Time Teasing Her

Don’t rush through foreplay. Take your time and go slow. Play with her – lick her clitoris or rub it gently with your thumb while kissing her deeply. Then back off and just kiss her neck or breasts. Have fun with it! The point is to get her really turned on and excited for what is to come. You want to get her to the point where she’s practically begging you to enter her – this way, she gasps at your penis size in pleasure, not in pain!

Also, remember to use lots and lots of good, water based lubricant. Even if you’ve gotten her so aroused that she’s practically dripping wet, you still want to make sure that you have lube on hand. If intercourse takes longer than expected or you just want to draw it out and enjoy yourself, things can get pretty dry down there, even if she was soaking wet to start with. Having lube on hand will keep things going smoothly for the duration.

Size Is Not Enough

Most men with a big penis think that they don’t need any technique – that their penis is long enough to reach her g-spot and all he has to do is stick it in. They think that sex tips and techniques are just for guys who don’t have large enough penises to pleasure their partners. This couldn’t be farther than the truth! Whether a man is big or small down there, he still needs to learn techniques to please a woman if he has any hope of giving her an orgasm at all.

Do some research of your own and read up on how women like to be touched. Learn where their hot spots are and how to stimulate them to bring her to climax. You may be able to do this with your penis, or you may want to give her an orgasm through oral sex and then get yours during the actual intercourse.

The point here is that what guys think is good for a woman is probably not even close to what she actually likes. It’s easy to make mistakes and turn a woman off completely – so don’t assume that just because you have a big penis that you have what it takes to make a woman’s wildest dreams come true. Take some time to learn exactly what to do and how to do it – then you’ll have her climbing the walls in ecstasy.

Communicate With Her

Another mistake that a lot of men make – whether they have a big penis or not – is that they fail to communicate with their partners or even pay attention to a woman’s non-verbal cues. They think they’re doing what she likes and keep doing it, all while ignoring her body language and vocal cues that tell you that what you’re doing just isn’t doing it for her.

Talk to your lover and ask her what she likes and what she doesn’t like. She may just be bold enough to tell you. If not, pay attention to her body language when you’re having sex with her. If your big penis is hurting her in any way, she’s likely going to be trying to shy or scoot away from you. If this happens, add lube and switch your technique. Experiment until you find things that work and remember that it’s all about having fun!

Relationship Advice: How To Avoid Fighting Over Salaries

Andrew Wang — Tue, 12 Jul 2011 23:00:27 +0000

Good relationship advice will tell you that money problems are the worst to have – most divorces are caused by them. Stop fighting over this before it starts.

Not a lot of people talk about it, but it can feel pretty bad when your partner makes more than you do. Though stereotypically it’s the man who gets upset to discover his girlfriend out earns him, the envy can go both ways. It’s particularly tough if you’re competitive by nature or happen to work in the same field.

Things can be even worse if you suddenly find yourself unemployed, while your partner continues to succeed in their job. With the way the economy has been going, this problem is more commonplace than ever. So what can you do to get rid of some of the awkwardness and animosity? Whether you’re the one who’s broke or the one who just got the big raise, there is lots of relationship advice to make your wage gap less problematic.

If Your Salary Is Greater

If you’re the one who’s doing well, you need to attempt to be as empathetic as possible. Try not to go on and on if you get a big raise or promotion. You deserve to be happy and you certainly shouldn’t hide it, but one night of celebrating is enough. No need to keep referring to it over and over in front of your S.O. They will still be happy for you, but if they’re having a particularly hard time themselves, they may not fully express it. The truth is that they’re probably feeling not only jealous, but also guilty about that jealousy.

As a result, their congratulations to you may not be as thrilled-sounding as you’d expect. Don’t let this hurt your feelings or diminish your own excitement. Just be aware that the subject is a little touchy. Though you may feel like enjoying some of your hard earned cash by going on more extravagant dates, try not to go overboard. If it’s your turn to treat, you can go somewhere a little pricier than normal, but don’t make a habit of it.

If you typically split the check, be sure to pick a destination with your partner’s budget in mind. It’s likely that you’re partner won’t feel comfortable saying that something is out of their price range, so don’t put them in a position where they have to protest.

If You’re Salary Is Less

On the other end of the equation, if you’re the individual who isn’t making the big bucks, you also need to be able to consider your mate’s feelings. Don’t rain on their parade because you’re feeling bad about yourself. Even if you’ve been out of work for a month, if your sweetie arrives home and informs you he or she was just promoted, let them know how proud you are. Celebrate with them a little. Remind yourself that you want your partner to be happy, and that their successes are your successes as well.

If you really feel like you can’t handle one more minute of hearing them talk about their good fortune, calmly say as much. Simply state that you’ve been feeling down about your own situation. Explain to them that you are happy for them, but you can’t help feeling a little jealous. Then ask them if you can change the topic for awhile, and make sure to do so without any rancor in your voice. As with most relationship issues, honesty is the best policy and good communication is important.

Keep Yourself Grounded

No matter which role you’re currently playing, you need to stay in touch with reality. Remind yourself that you might not always be the one in your current position. If the roles were reversed, how would you want to be treated? Someday they very well may be, and you’ll be counting on your significant other to show you the same respect and love you showed them.

You should also remember that a big salary isn’t everything in life. If you both woke up poor tomorrow, you would still be lucky to have each other. A little career or monetary envy isn’t worth breaking up over. Keep that in mind, and you’ll be able to bridge the gap.

6 Ways To Make Male Masturbation Better Than Sex

Kaylen Jackson — Tue, 12 Jul 2011 14:00:00 +0000

Male masturbation can be even better than sex if you do it right. Most guys just take a few minutes out of their day to polish one off, but if you embrace it and enjoy it rather than just try to get it over with, you can give yourself an orgasm that is out of this world. Here’s how to make male masturbation absolutely incredible!

Use Lube!

While male masturbation can be achieved without lube, it’s definitely not the best way to do it. Unfortunately, this is how most guys masturbate. Since they were young, they learned to do it quickly and without using any props that might possibly give them away or be difficult to hide if they got caught. It’s time to shed this learned behavior and start enjoying yourself!

Lube will intensify the sensations you experience during masturbation and make it feel more like sex. Without lube, there is a great deal more friction and the sensations aren’t as pleasurable. An uncircumcised male may notice this less than a circumcised male because they can glide their foreskin up and down the shaft of their penis. Some circumcised men do have enough skin left over after the surgery to do this to an extent, however, the skin is often stretched tight over a circumcised penis. A circumcised man will definitely want to use lube, since they can’t!

Try A Masturbation Sleeve

Male masturbation is easy with your hand, but it’s a lot better with a masturbation sleeve. A masturbation sleeve is a soft, jelly like sex toy that you slip over the penis and use as a “stroker.” They can be made out of a variety of materials, including silicone, Cyberskin and jelly materials, and many of them are textured to feel even better than a real vagina.

With a generous dollop of lube inside the sleeve, you can transform boring masturbation into something that feels totally different – and better – than anything you’ve ever felt before. Experiment with different types of masturbation sleeves to find the best fit for you.

Watch Porn – The Kind You REALLY Like

Almost all guys watch porn – that’s a given. However, there are many men who don’t watch the porn they really like. They may have a secret fetish that they’re embarrassed about, or they may get turned on by things that are considered shameful by many social circles. Therefore, these men don’t watch the porn that would really turn them on – instead, they watch something “conventional” that will get the job done, but nothing more.

If this is you, stop watching mediocre porn and find the stuff that really does it for you. Don’t be embarrassed to watch something that isn’t “traditional.” There are hundreds of different types of interests when it comes to the adult film industry, and you’re not alone. There are a lot of strange things out there, but if what gets you off doesn’t hurt anyone, there’s really nothing wrong with enjoying what you like. Since men are entirely visual creatures when it comes to sex, watching what really gets you hot has the power to increase your pleasure significantly.

Use A Warm Towel

Temperature has a lot to do with how good sex feels. For example, a real vagina is always warm and wet. So why not make male masturbation as warm and wet as you can? If you’ve got a bottle of lube handy, you’ve got the wet part covered. You can make it warm by throwing a damp towel in the microwave for a few seconds, but be careful not to get it too hot. It does, however, cool down quickly so it may take a few tries to get it just the right temperature.

Wrap the warm, damp towel around your penis (which, at this point, should have a lubed up masturbation sleeve on it) and then cover the damp towel with a dry one. You can also warm up the dry one in your clothes dryer if you like.

Go Slow And Take Your Time

For the same reason that men don’t often use lube during male masturbation, they also don’t take their time when they’re doing it. It’s just not how they learned to masturbate. They learned to do it quickly, before anyone could catch them. Make male masturbation feel more like real sex by planning to do it at a time when you are completely alone and you can lock your doors and turn off your phone.

Take your time to enjoy each phase of the process, from arousal to orgasm. Don’t rush through it – you’ll notice that the longer you spend pleasuring yourself, the better it will feel!

Let Your Orgasm Build

Don’t think that orgasm is where you need to be as soon as possible. When you’re having sex, you relish every feeling and sensation, making it last as long as you can. You also try your best to hold out on your own orgasm so your partner can have one or two of her own. Don’t think that this is something that you can only do during sex – you can also do it during male masturbation.

When you feel like you’re close to orgasm, back off a little. Stroke yourself in a different way or back off completely. Wait a few minutes before going back to it. This will not only train you to delay your orgasm so you can have more stamina during sex, it will also make masturbation absolutely explosive when you finally can’t hold out anymore!

How To Reinvent Yourself After A Breakup – And Get Her Back

Michael Webb — Mon, 11 Jul 2011 23:00:52 +0000

Breakup schmakeup – you’re over it! Or are you? Here’s how to create a new you after a nasty breakup – and get your girlfriend back!

You’ve broken up with your ex and are either single or with someone new, but you know you jumped back into the dating pool too soon. You realize this was a rebound knee-jerk reaction and what’s worse, you can’t get your ex out of your mind. You want her back and you want her back for good! Stick around because not only will I tell you how you can get her back, but how you can improve on your own life and self-image at the same time.

Learn To Live Your Life

We all know men and women are wired differently – “Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus right?” But what if you could rewire the inner you, both physically as well as emotionally! You can and whilst you may not wake up tomorrow a totally new person both physically and emotionally (believe me it doesn’t even happen overnight on those reality television shows), the first step in creating a new you to win her back is to START living the life you want to live and being the person you and SHE wants you to be.

It can’t be that difficult or too far a reach or disconnect or else she wouldn’t have dated you in the first place right? We are all primed from early childhood, allocated labels, “athletic,” “academic,” “artistic” etc., but often these labels are self-fulfilling prophecies that create our identity as opposed to shaping our own identity.

Explore A New You

Despite the fact that your breakup with your ex might have been the catalyst for your desire to change, self-actualization, or becoming more confident is part of life’s evolution. With evolution, your needs change, you acquire wisdom and experience and now you have reached a stage where you need to try something different.

You may want to explore a new career, move to a different location, explore other activities and behaviors. In fact, this could also be the reason your relationship with your ex back-fired. Neither of you were getting what you needed. Perhaps she felt unappreciated or bored, and perhaps you found excuses to be away from home. However, the breakup between the two of you is treating the symptom, not the cause.

Take Care Of Yourself

Take the next couple of days to make a list of all the positive and negative factors in your relationship but at the same time, look after your health by eating healthy, exercising and getting enough sleep. This time apart allows you to reassess your life, and your possible life together with your ex, objectively.

By the time you meet up with your ex she will already begin to see the ‘new emerging you’; and might possibly be inspired to join you. Whatever the situation, it is important to remember that you’re not stuck with who you were in the past. We often feel like who or what we aspire to be has to “make sense.” But we’re always growing, and taking a leap into a new life is exciting and even better with your ex by your side.

It starts off as small steps and it was Confucius who said: “A journey of a thousand miles starts with the first step,” and so to create a new you and a new relationship, it’s often the little things that are the first step.