Front row London Fashion Week: Curry.

Birthday party in neighbourhood local: Curry.

When sis offered her services for an old friend’s shock wedding I knew I had to pull the stops out.

I made for the farmer’s market. Followed by lunch in a Polish caf with mini Basu, the man, his crazy younger bro and friends.  Then made a pit stop into a boutique to buy an entire outfit for the evening. While mini Basu slobbered on the season’s latest polyester offerings. The bro offered unsolicited fashion advice and the man faked a fainting spell.

Luckily, the recipe wasn’t going to finish me off altogether. Durga Puja, the annual Bengali religious calendar event was on. The dish was going to an old family favourite - Maacher Jhol - the famous Bengali fish curry.

Aromatic and light, it didn’t render me fishy. Sis said it made her teary - with happiness. Bro declared it was the best fish he had ever tasted. Both offered endless nights of babysitting.

It pays to cook Indian. Quite.

Feeds 2:

• 350gm meaty white fish (I used Rock fish)
• Half tsp panch phoron
• 1 bay leaf
• 1 tbsp coriander powder
• 1 tsp cumin powder
• 1 tsp turmeric powder
• Half tsp chilli powder
• 4 green chillies
• Salt to taste
• 4 tbsp mustard oil

Slice the fish into one inch thick slices and rub in half a teaspoon of salt and half the turmeric. Bring the oil to heat on high in a large frying pan and fry the fish slices for a minute on either side to seal.

Remove them with a slotted spoon and chuck in the bay leaf and panch phoron. As they sizzle up, mix the spice powders into a mug of hot water and pour into the pan. Let this bubble up and then cook on a medium heat for 10 minutes.

Next, gently lower the fish pieces into the curry. Slit the green chillies and add them along with salt to your taste. Cover for about five minutes until the fish is cooked through. Serve with hot steamed rice or an easy dal like I did for simple pleasure.

The last jobless Friday night involved a leggy single brunette. Also top friend and white wine fiend.

First stop, the global launch of Smirnoff’s new Green Apple and Lime flavours. My favourite choice of tipple. Followed closely by Tanqueray and tonic. And champagne. (There must be some others)

I expected free cocktails and vodka bottles. I got a row of melting ice sculptures. The top had fallen off St Paul’s Cathedral. The London Eye had liquefied beyond recognition. Drinks were an hour later in a different venue.

An hour? That’s two eternities for a new mum on a night out!

Cocktail bar, French bistro and Cinema cafe later I was ready to call it a night. Return to my previous life as a corporate superbitch. Whip the world into shape with some quick Indian cooking.

No better way to get going than an easy, simple dal. It takes 20 minutes. Doesn’t disappoint. Enjoy.

Feeds 4:

• 225gm yellow moong lentils (about 1 mug)
• Half inch ginger
• 4 garlic cloves
• 1 long dried red chilli
• Half tsp chilli powder
• Half tsp turmeric powder
• 1 tbsp oil
• Salt to taste

Pour the lentils into a large pot and wash thoroughly under a cold tap under the water runs clear.

Add three mugs of boiling water, the turmeric and return to the boil. As the lentils start bubbling, scum and foam will appear on the surface. Just skim it off with a wooden spoon and lower the heat to medium so it bubbles away gently.

The mixture will go all fibrous in 10 minutes. Chop the ginger and garlic finely and mix it in. You need to keep adding hot water half a cup at a time, when the lentils are dry and start spluttering, to keep a runny but thick consistency.

In another 10 minutes, when the lentils are well integrated with the water, heat the oil in a little saucepan on high. Chuck in the turmeric, red chilli and chilli powder and as the red chilli starts sizzling mix this, the tadka, into the lentils.

Add salt to your taste and a knob of butter if you fancy before you ladle it over steaming hot rice. For a simple, complete meal, try it with Dhaniya Murgh.

It was all going so well. Until we returned via Dubai. I arrived at the departure gate. Baby intact. Outfit in place. Handbag missing.

Disaster. All those valuables. That lucky lipgloss! The irreplaceable Chanel sunglasses! A brand new, albeit empty, Coccinelle wallet!

Luckily, the man had the passports and boarding cards. We jumped on the flight back to London. Mini Basu played merrily with the crew. While I mourned the loss of my precious belongings.

I wasted no time on my return. I ranted and raved at Dubai airport police. Someone stole my handbag. The sunglasses were like no other. The bag was almost new. And when I stopped for breath, they announced it had been found in the last coffee shop I had visited. All contents intact.

This called for celebration. I remembered seeing a decadent recipe for Nalli Gosht, or lamb shank curry, in an old copy of Indian GQ. Contributed by a hotel chef it had the prerequisite cream, butter et al. In my version, you can shove the whole lot into the oven and finish off the curry by running it through a sieve. I ditched the cream, but a small amount of butter really crowned this beauty.

At just over an hour, it’s on my uppermost limit of quick Indian cooking. But I defended my choice by having ample time to make Jeera Pulao, Kulfi and raita for my small dinner party while the lamb did its thing in the oven. You could, of course, cook this on the hob but the shanks will take at least an hour and a half to soften, while you turn them at regular intervals.

Feeds 2:

• 2 medium lamb shanks
• 1 pint of tomato sauce or passata
• 2 medium onions
• 4 garlic cloves
• 2 inches ginger
• 1 tsp chilli powder
• 1 tsp paprika
• Half tsp turmeric powder
• 1 tbsp coriander powder
• 1 tsp garam masala
• 1 black cardamom
• 1 inch cinnamon
• 2 bay leaves
• 2 tbsp natural Greek (thick) yogurt
• 1 tbsp oil
• 50gm butter
• Salt to taste

Slice the onions and chop the ginger and garlic up finely. Turn the oven on to 190 degree centigrade (170 for fan assisted). Place a casserole dish large enough to hold the two lamb shanks on the hob and bring the oil to heat. When piping hot, throw in the bay leaves, cinnamon and cardamom. As they sizzle up, mix in the onion, ginger and garlic and fry for 10 minutes until translucent.

Then add all the masala powders, along with the lamb shanks. Vigorously stir them, mixing well with the masalas, until the shanks brown and the pungent aroma of the spices subsides.

Now, pour in the tomato sauce and transfer the casserole dish to the middle shelf of the oven. If you have bought a pack of lamb shanks, it should tell you how long they will need to cook. If not, roast for an hour flipping the shanks over once half way through cooking time.

When the lamb falls off the bone easily when prodded with a fork, remove the casserole dish from the oven and turn it off. Carefully remove the lamb shanks on to a oven safe plate and stick them back in the oven to keep them warm. Then pass the curry in the casserole dish through a sieve, pressing hard with a wooden spoon to get as much of the ingredients, into a small pan.

Cook the curry on a low setting, mixing the yogurt and butter in for about ten minutes until you see oil floating to the top through little pores. Add salt to taste, stir in the garam masala and served spooned over the tender lamb shanks with some Jeera Pulao on the side.

Check out Deeba at Passionate About Baking’s mouth watering version too.

I mean who knew one shot of vodka was 25ml? Everyone has a tequila glass!

And why would anyone who buys a cookbook written by yours truly expect to find a recipe for home made ghee in it? I’d rather spend the time trimming my hair with a nail clipper, thank you very much.

Meanwhile, the summer barbeque season has truly kicked off. I’ve also been drinking copious amounts of Rose wine, while billowing barbeques blow sausage smoke through my carefully crafted locks.

True to form, I’ve been saving time, effort and precious brain cells these days by making the same kebab for every barbeque I’ve attended. The juicy, skewered Chicken Reshmi Tikka has been reeled out on three occasions causing quite a sensation. It’s dead easy to make with readily-available ingredients.

Look out for the meat tenderiser powder that goes into it at supermarkets. It’s totally natural and works a treat to soften even the hardest pieces of meat. Perfect for quick fix marinades when every second counts.

Makes 15 skewers:

• 1.5 kg chicken breasts (about 15)
• 15 cloves garlic
• 5 inches ginger
• 3 tbsp coriander powder
• 3 tbsp chilli powder
• 3 tbsp meat tenderiser
• 200ml double cream (I know, I know… but this feeds 15)
• 250gm natural Greek yogurt
• 15 bamboo or metal skewers
• Salt to taste

Chop finely or puree the ginger and garlic together. Take a large mixing bowl and mix in all the ingredients. Add salt to your taste. Remember, the marinade needs to be fairly salty as the barbeque will burn some of it away.

Now cut the chicken into large bite-sized chunks. The best way to do this is cut off the tail end of each chicken breast first and then halve lengthwise each piece and chop through the width. Add th chicken pieces into the marinade bowl. Mix together well.

Leave this to sit covered for at least an hour and up to three hours. When you’re ready to eat, thread the chicken pieces onto the skewers (5-6 chicken pieces for each). Then cook on a sizzling but not smoky barbeque for 20 minutes turning regularly to ensure even cooking.

If the weather’s pants or you don’t have a barbeque, you could just cook the lot in two batches under a hot grill for the same amount of time. Serve on a bed of fresh sliced onions drizzled with some chilli powder, lemon juice and salt. Many times.

One sunny morning, I opened our balcony door to let the first seasonal rays of sunshine in. A breath of fresh air. A joy in my step. A view of dead leaves.

Lovely.

My father-in-law took pity on me and decided to lead the charge on the gardening project. I extracted my fluorescent gardening gloves and scissors in preparation.

“Those are kitchen scissors.”

Yes, I know dad.

“When did you last water these plants”

Two weeks ago.

“You know plants need water to survive?”

That’s only a small technical oversight!

We spent the evening clearing up, replanting courgette and tomato plants my sister-in-law had ambitiously donated to me. Dad did, that is. I made every excuse to leap back into the flat: dinner, baby, strange itch in my little finger.

One week of watering later, I have two courgette flowers and a thriving collection of flowers (identity unknown). I won’t swamp you with courgette curries yet, but here’s a winter to summer Gobi Mattar or cauliflower and pea stir fry to celebrate seasonal changes.

Feeds 2:

• 1 small cauliflower
• Half mug green shelled peas (I used freshly frozen one)
• 1 medium potato
• 1 tsp coriander powder
• Half tsp cumin powder
• Half tsp cumin seeds
• Half tsp chilli powder
• Half tsp turmeric powder
• 1 tbsp oil
• Salt to taste

Cut the cauliflower into large florets. Don’t make them too small or they’ll fall apart when you cook them.

Peel and chop the potato into little pieces. Bring a large frying pan to heat on high with the tablespoon of oil. When it’s hot, add the cumin seeds and as they sizzle up, the potatoes along with all the spice powders.

Stir the potatoes for five minutes until their edges turn translucent and you can insert a fork into them albeit with some difficulty. Now mix in the cauliflower florets, lower the heat to a medium, cover and cook for five minutes.

Lastly, stir in the peas, salt to taste and cook for a final five minutes until the cauliflower is soft.

All blingtastic, I was going to attend the lunchtime launch of Spooning with Rosie, my friend Rosie Lovell’s book. The lovely Rosie runs a deli cafe in trendy Brixton. Vintage dresses and unshaven faces were going to rub shoulders amidst mounds of quality cheese, loafs of bread and stacks of her cupcakes.

The anticipation was immense as I dressed mini Basu in a co-ordinated romper. Rosie’s cookbook is a sensational tome brimming with eclectic recipes that nod to London’s vibrant cafe culture. That aside it featured my Bhapa Doi Bengali cheesecake recipe with a mention of yours truly.

Several glasses of wine and hours of mingling later, I couldn’t wait to get stuck into a semi-complicated recipe that matched the dizzying heights I had reached. It was going to be Kofta Curry, soft spicy meatballs in a tomato base.

I mixed the Kofta or meatballs before going to bed. Cooked the dish the following day. Scooped the finished lot into a bowl. Just in time for my hungry dad’s arrival. This experienced cook was not going to be easy to please. “So how is it”, I asked, waiting for the lavish praise.

“Delicious”, he replied. And just as I was about to mutter a thanks, he added: “You could have cooked the masala a bit more.”

Nothing like family to keep you grounded. Here’s the perfected recipe for when you want to show off. Best served with a pinch of humility.

PS = I made this with beef mince but you could just as easily substitute it with lamb.

Feeds 4:

For the kofta:

• 500gm beef mince
• 1 tsp chilli powder
• Half tsp turmeric powder
• 2 tsp coriander powder
• 2 tsp cumin powder
• 2 eggs
• 1 tsp salt

For the curry:

• 1 large onion
• 400gm tin chopped tomatoes
• 1 inch cinnamon
• 1 bay leaf
• 4 garlic cloves
• 1 inch ginger
• 1 tsp paprika
• Half tsp chilli powder
• Half tsp garam masala
• 10 sprigs fresh coriander
• 2 tbsp oil
• Salt to taste

Mix all the kofta ingredients together and stick in the fridge. It needs a good hour, but I did this before going to bed and left it in the fridge until I was ready to cook.

When you’re ready to make the curry, halve the mince mixture and fashion it into two large sausages. Then break off equal pieces and roll them into largish balls on a chopping board and leave to sit.

Chop the onion, ginger and garlic finely. Bring the oil to heat on high in a large non-stick pan. When it’s hot, chuck in the bay leaf and cinnamon. As they start sizzling, mix in the onion, ginger and garlic and fry until golden brown. This will take a good 10-15 minutes on a high heat.

If the mixture starts getting stuck to the bottom of the pan, add a little hot water and scrape off.

Next, add the paprika and chilli powders and fry for another two minutes. Then mix in the tin of tomatoes. You could use three large ripe and red chopped tomatoes if you prefer going fresh. Now let this masala mixture start bubbling, then lower the heat to a simmer and cook for 10 minutes.

At this stage, oil will start oozing through little pores in the mixture. When it does, gently lower the koftas into the curry. Cook for 10 minutes and then flip them over to the other side for another 10 minutes.

Alternatively you could grill them for the same amount of time under a medium heat and mix them into the curry. Leave the curry bubbling, just add a bit of water if it dries up.

Finally, add the garam masala, salt to taste and sprinkle chopped coriander. This was lovely with a hot roti that I bought in a store earlier.

Then an invite arrived for the launch of Iron Maiden’s new boutique hotel in Soho. Champagne? Canapes? Paparazzi? Hallelujiah! Finally, a reason to resurrect the glamour stakes to their original high standards.

I slipped off to the hairdresser. A lovely Spanish gal, who can talk for England. Darling, I said, I have two hours; make me beautiful again.

She set to work with gusto. Clicked her tongue at the disgrace that used to be my lustrous locks. Sat me under an over-sized chrome dryer. Handed over the month’s latest fashion and gossip magazines and said: “You have 40 minutes”.

40 minutes? Forget getting my hair done. I could have slept!

I spent the time bringing myself up to date with the season’s latest fashion trends. Safari. 80s body con. Bright colours. Do they make playsuits for babies?

I came home fabulous, wore a shower cap and cooked Paneer Capsicum, a light and breezy Indian cheese and bell pepper sir fry.

Life is slowly returning back to normal. Or some version of it at least. Just in time for summer.

Feeds 4:

• 225gm paneer
• 3 mixed peppers (capsicum)
• 3 garlic cloves
• Half inch ginger
• Half tsp chilli powder
• Half tsp turmeric powder
• Half tsp garam masala
• 1 large tomato
• Handful of fresh coriander
• 1 tblsp oil
• Salt to taste

Puree or chop finely the ginger and garlic. Slice the paneer into half-centimetre pieces width-wise and cut the peppers into long strips, discarding the middle.

Heat the oil in a medium wok on high. When it’s hot, stir in the ginger and garlic. As they turn pale brown in a few seconds roughly chop and add the tomato, turmeric and chilli powders.

Fry this for two minutes until the aroma becomes less pungent and then stir in the peppers.

Cook the peppers for five minutes, stirring regularly, until they start going soft. Then mix in the paneer pieces taking care not to break them and half a cup of hot water.

Let this all simmer together for five minutes. Finally, stir in the garam masala, the chopped coriander and add salt to your taste. Serve with warm buttered rotis for maximum pleasure.

Let’s just say motherhood is much like cooking a biryani, naked, on a patio, in the middle of a blizzard.

Still, I’ve had plenty to keep me going. My personal favourite is the card that reads: “When I grow up I wan to be a total bitch, just like my mother”. A close tie with the one featuring a designer-clad mummy whispering “Gucci, Gucci” into her stroller.

Oh and the bottle of yet-to-be-opened gold-encased limited edition Armand De Brignac champagne.

Mini Basu is sampling the delights of Baby Dior, the farmer’s market and the cultural hotspot of South Bank. While I snatch precious moments for a spot of shopping, beauty sleep and cooking.

Thank God for quick Indian cooking.

My first recipe back had to be a light and healthy chicken curry steeped in fresh coriander - Dhaniya Murgh. It took care of dinner. Suitably impressed visitors. And launched my comeback in half an hour.

Here’s to life’s next phase…

PS = Thanks SO much for all the wishes, emails and love you’ve sent my way. Mini Basu will wield a wooden spoon as soon as possible.

Feeds 2:

500gm chicken thighs and drumsticks
1 tsp garlic paste
1 tsp ginger paste
Half tsp chilli powder
Half tsp turmeric powder
Half tsp coriander powder
2 tbsp natural Greek (thick) yogurt
15gm fresh coriander
1 tbsp oil
Salt to taste

Skin the chicken and marinate it in the yogurt, chilli, turmeric, ginger and garlic pastes. I did this in between painting my nails and baby stuff in the morning and left the chicken out covered with some clear film.

When you’re ready to cook, bring the oil to heat over a high flame in a small pot. When it’s sizzling, fry the chicken with the coriander powder for 10 minutes until evenly brown all over. Add half a cup of hot water, lower the flame to a gentle boil, cover and cook for another 10 to 15 minutes until the chicken is well cooked. You’ll know it’s done because the meat will separate from the bone on the drumsticks.

To finish, chop up the coriander leaves and stir into the chicken along with the salt. It should have a light, moist curry. Perfect to mop up with some readymade naan and a serving of thick yogurt.

I got a proper send off with Chanel skin goodies and a bang-on-trend silver cuff bracelet. These girls are after my own heart.

In the meantime, mother arrived.  Armed with new recipes, a suitcase of dubious home cures for indigestion and acne and a life time’s supply of dry roasted whole cumin.

I’ve delegated all manner of housework to her and seized my opportunity to accomplish a flurry of last minute activities. A vegan feature for the next issue of Cook Vegetarian magazine. A stream of beauty treatments, acupuncture massages and a promising performance involving gin-soaked puppets.

If I’m going down, I’m going down in style.

Sadly, this blog and blogging have had to take a back seat for a bit. I can’t promise how regular I’ll be in the next few weeks. But in the immortal words of The Terminator - “I’ll be back”.

Meanwhile, here’s a very simple Mixed Bean Palya, stir fried pulses with coconut, from the collection of recipes I contributed to the mag.

Feeds 2:

• 1 tin mixed cooked beans
• 2 tsp channa lentils
• 2 small carrots
• 2 tbsp unsweetened dessicated coconut
• 1 tsp fresh lime juice
• 1 tsp mustard seeds
• 1 tsp cumin seeds
• 2 dry red chillies
• 10 curry leaves
• 1 tsp brown cane sugar
• 1 tablespoon oil
• Salt to taste

Sauté a teaspoon of mustard seeds, cumin seeds, two teaspoons of channa lentils, two dry red chillies and 10 curry leaves in 1 tablespoon of hot oil until light brown.

Mix in two small chopped carrots and one teaspoon of brown cane sugar. Cook for five minutes on a medium flame. Then mix in a washed and drained tin of cooked mixed beans.

Stir-fry for five minutes, making sure the ingredients don’t stick to the bottom of the pan. Finally, stir in two tablespoons of unsweetened desiccated coconut, 1 teaspoon of fresh lime juice and salt to taste.

I am improving every week.

As I handed it over to the manager with instructions about when to bring it out for the birthday girl, she dropped the bombshell. The bar has a cakeage charge of £1.50 per person.

Or I could buy their birthday cake at the bargain basement price of £45 for 6 portions.

I tried every trick imaginable:

• That’s more than what it cost me to bake the damn thing.
• But the cake isn’t worth the charge!

And finally, when my long face wouldn’t melt their cold hearts. I pulled the ace card: I spent all day baking that over eight months pregnant.

Cakeage cancelled. Job done.

Shame I have only three weeks more of this fantastic opportunity. Like me, my social life is now slowly grinding to a halt. London Fashion Week - decline. Award-winning theatre - pass. All replaced by cosy nights in with friends and wholesome one-pot meals.

Like this Lamb Pulao. The biggest difference between a pulao and biryani is complexity. So I cooked the dish quickly like a pulao but with a number of biryani-style spices for added oomph.  It was just what a friend and I needed with a glass of quality red vino on a Wednesday night.

PS= This took a good 1.5 hours to make. But I ate it for three meals so it was highly time-effective

PPS= You could use a pressure cooker to stew the lamb. One whistle and then 10 minutes. Then lid off to dry up the curry
Feeds 6:

• 1kg lamb chunks (I used a mix of chops and diced lamb on the bone)
• 500gm Basmati rice
• 1 medium onion

For the lamb:

• 2 large onions
• 4 cloves garlic
• 2 inches ginger
• 2 tsp coriander powder
• 1 tsp cumin powder
• 1 tsp chilli powder
• Half tsp turmeric powder
• Half tsp mace powder
• Half tsp freshly ground nutmeg
• One inch stick cinnamon
• 2 tbsp thick yogurt
• 2 green finger chillies
• 10 sprigs fresh coriander
• Salt to taste
• 2 tbsp oil

For the rice:

• 2 black cardamoms
• 1 inch cinnamon
• 1 star anise
• 1 tbsp ghee
• Salt to taste

First cook the lamb. Slice the two onions and puree together the ginger, garlic, cinnamon with a tablespoon of water. Better still you could just use ginger garlic paste and some cinnamon powder to save time.

Fry the onions until pale golden in hot oil over a high flame. Add the ginger garlic paste and fry for another 5 minutes until the masala turns a darker shade of gold. Chope up the chillies and coriander.

Next, go in with all the spices and the lamb. Stir vigorously for five minutes until the meat darkens.  Mix in the yogurt, half a cup of hot water and cook covered on a medium flame for 45 minutes stirring regularly until the lamb softens. Then take the lid off and let the curry dry up.

Now get the rice going by washing it thoroughly under cold running water. In a large pot, bring the ghee to heat over a high flame. When it’s hot, chuck in the whole spices and let them sizzle for a few seconds. Then measure the washed rice in a cup, add it to the pot and saute for a minute until it turns bright white.

Then stir in the meat, 1.5 cups of hot water, bring to a boil and then simmer on a low flame for 15 minutes until the rice absorbs all the liquids. That fluffy texture is all important, so don’t stir the rice more than two times when it’s cooking and don’t add water unless your rice remains uncooked.

Serve with the remaining onion sliced and fried on top and a raita on the side.