Red Matter Background Noise

Episode 139: Clit Eastwood

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 25 May 2012 12:00:00 -0400

Wanna hear a story about two kids getting their heads chopped off by a helicopter propeller on a movie set? Well, you can hear all about that as well as a bunch of other horrible movie set disasters in this episode, you sick bastards! We also talked about a man who made a Super Soaker into a deadly shotgun, poachers legally being shot on sight in India, and Will Smith's recent run-in with a kissing bandit. Also, a new segment was introduced this week - "Black People News" - where we discussed Raven Symone & Idris Elba's questioned sexuality, two kids on Twitter who caused a scandal by "murderin' the sluttery" and "killin' the neck", Lil Boosie found not guilty of murder & Rapper 2 Chainz being arrested for brass knuckles that weren't even really brass knuckles. Oh, and one more thing: "CLIT Eastwood". Yup. Listen and figure it out.

Episode 138: Flying Axe Handle

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 18 May 2012 12:00:00 -0400

In this week's news, a man needs to shit out a diamond ring or else he will be in (more) trouble. Elsewhere, a man double karate chopped - or flying axe-handled - a woman who bit him in the dick and killed her. After covering that, we got into a discussion about relationships (compromising, simping, low expectations, dumb people, past experiences, what works/what doesn't, etc.), Derrek's story about being a creep around Halifax, an update about Jon Travolta's gaiety (he still loves cock, don't worry), a look at what's going on in the NBA Finals, and Devin's review on the game that has the entire world going nuts - Diablo 3! So, we have violence, sex, sports, video games, news & opinions. Why WOULDN'T you listen to us? Oh...you don't have ears...damn...SORRY! Go look at pictures, I guess. MOVING pictures, even.

Episode 137: Travolting

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 11 May 2012 12:00:00 -0400

Comedian Kyle Hickey picks up the 4th mic on this week's show to help bring the ruckus! Topics of discussion include John Travolta's spree of gayness, Adam Yauch's death & the Beastie Boys, a man who got struck in the balls by lightning, an evil clown who you can hire to stalk your child, ancient torture tools, a man who can smash his hard-on through a grapefruit, and Twitter jail. After that, we browsed an inmate dating site as a way of trying to find true love...since we need it. We need it BAD. Do you love us? No? Well, can you listen to our show and pretend that you do? Okay, great. Thanks. I guess we go together now.

Episode 136: Fart Bakery

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 04 May 2012 12:00:00 -0400

In stunning news this week, the "Octomom" is going to be doing porn because she's broke as a joke! Wow! We discussed some of the "porn stunts" that she could pull (what objects would fit inside her vagina?), as well as how much we would need to be paid in order to star in a flick with her. Keeping the sexiness going, we talked about a German sex freak who sexed a man up so good and so long that he had to call the police on her. Poor fella. We also discussed a boy being suspended from school for wearing a religious shirt (are we getting carried away with what is appropriate and what's not?), Facebook's new "organ donor" plan (we also thought up some other cool ideas that Facebook could do), and then we took a look at a new study about how two people can be matched up romantically based off of their communication skills and the words they use. It's actually really fascinating and we had an in-depth conversation about it, so I promise that you'll learn from it and look at things in a new way. You want to learn & be loved, right? Well then listen to this week's show because it'll help all of your fantasies come true and whisk you away to magical lands previously unknown, you unlovable half-wit.

Episode 135: Doomed's Day

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 27 Apr 2012 12:00:00 -0400

This week WE'RE DOOMED...relax, not our show, I just mean that the band, "We're Doomed" joined us for our middle segment to discuss their music! We also got the guys to open up about who they think the hottest woman in the world is, talked video games, discussed the greatest foods in the world, got them to create an album cover and a "dream concert" & more! Discussion topics this week include Metta World Pea...err, Ron Artest's elbow to James Harden and violence in sports (new concussion policies, the intense NHL playoff violence, suspension lengths in sports), the "I Can Count To Potato" girl discovered in real life (her parents are pissed; how seriously should trolling be taken?), the banning of yoga pants & leggings in schools, a tranquilized bear falling out of a tree, our favorite xvideo searches, Buff Bagwell breaking his neck, saxophone players killing themselves in hotels, and a magical school bus that cures hangovers. This episode is like a breakfast buffet. We have a lot of everything for everyone...and we're delicious. So eat us. With your EARS.

Episode 134: Cup-and-Balls

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 20 Apr 2012 12:00:00 -0400

Dick Clarke is dead...but our show is still alive, proving that if there IS a God, he might be a cruel being. On this episode we discussed a man who interrupted a newscast in a very interesting way, gave out 3 "Dummy Awards" (seriously, these 3 people are dumber than anyone you know x100), talked about Acura getting in some trouble (they had some racial issues arise while trying to cast a commercial), studied a Japanese hermit (we also discussed camping and how well we would do trying to survive all alone on an island - watchout for ass-scorpions!), gave some love to the show Storage Wars, weighed the pros and cons of having sex in the shower (it really is a dangerous act), did some flavored-condom taste-testing (fresh from the wrapper, not on a cock, and not pulled from an orifice), and talked about all of the issues and happenings in regards to the Raymond Taavel murder in Halifax, Nova Scotia. It's Background Noise - we welcome everybody! So give us a shot! Even your children and grandparents can listen, if they want to! We don't care...but really that's probably not a good idea. OR IS IT?! Hmmm...no...but yes...but yes no.

Episode 133: A Period Piece

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 13 Apr 2012 12:00:00 -0400

This is a life-changing episode right here, folks - but how is that different from any other week? We discussed the death of Fashion Television (how did it last so long in the first place?), the anniversary of the Titanic (it's weird how people "celebrate" a tragedy), pig orgasms (we watched a video on how to make a female pig cum and it was uhhh...educational...), the mega millions (how would you live and what would you do with $36 million?), Axel Rose being a bit of an asshole...AGAIN (turning down his Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction - was he right or wrong for that?), arguing with women and fighting with men at bars (drunk people are idiots, basically), Devin's hatred for Charles Manson (ol' Charlie was up for parole recently and was denied), the word "hate" (what it means & it's power - do you actually hate any one and why?), the over-sexualization of young girls (the overly sexy clothes they make for kids and the fact that the TV show Toddlers and Tiaras shouldn't exist), a good way to fight racism (a discussion about how awful EVERYONE, regardless of color, can be) and then bits and pieces of other interesting topics, like Hitler hugging a kitten. Only on Background Noise can you get deep, philosophical conversations, dick jokes, news, and lessons on how to finger bang a pig. Prepare for landing. Background Noise to you. Come in...do you read? I hope so, otherwise this was all written for nothing.

Episode 132: Back in '95

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 06 Apr 2012 12:00:00 -0400

This week Corey Mombourquette joined us to talk about his Lilah Kemp project, which mixes live readings, music, stand-up comedy & more. We also talked about Game Of Thrones (the season 2 premiere, the greatness of season 1, and the books - no spoilers), wrestling and play-fighting as kids (almost killing friends by mistake), those giant Jurassic Park cups that are perfect for mixing drinks, vintage WWF glasses, lobster genitals (what is the deal with those?), church experiences, the value of family (it's important to call your mom, you know), white cops in the USA tommy gunning black people's feet like Dick Tracy, why cocaine sucks and other interesting and amazing topics that will turn your head inside out so that you can look at your own thoughts and learn about them. You like to learn, don't you? And laugh? Well then shooooooot man, put Background Noise in your ears and smoke it! You'll get so high even the clouds will turn green with envy...and sickness. So, they might vomit all over the world. Chill.

Episode 131: Grow a Beard

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 30 Mar 2012 12:00:00 -0400

Josh Hogan - businessman, groomed Ewok, member of metal band Orchid's Curse, possible viking, and writer of the Red Tentacle blog - joined us on this episode to talk about business and life solutions. If you're a musician or business owner, you're also a person who especially needs to listen to his ideas & advice because you WILL learn something. We also caught up on the newest developments in the Trayvon Martin case, talked about the transgendered beauty queen who got kicked out of a pageant, found out what the point of the Adam's apple is, learned about cisgendered people, discussed weird banjo players, and dreamt about being in a hot tub with a BBQ an arm's length away. This is an episode that you need in order to survive. Don't let yourself get caught without it. Tie it to your utility belt.

Episode 130: Gorilla Press

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 23 Mar 2012 12:00:00 -0400

Here's a breakdown of this week's Background Noise: the Trayvon Martin case (what went down, racial profiling, Florida's crazy laws, hate crimes, black on black crime), gorilla facts (how much can they bench press and how do you survive if you find yourself in the middle of a pack of them?), how having a gun effects a person psychologically, a recap of Geeks vs. Nerds in Halifax, NFL (brief talk of trades and bounties), a man who died and came back to life, March Madness, feminine vs. masculine (is gender blurring necessary?), the art of arguing/debating, and ice cream recipes. Okay, we didn't have ice cream recipes, but the rest is still awesome, isn't it? No? Well shut-up then! Here's an ice cream recipe for you - go buy your favorite flavor from the store, you jerk! And then eat it and listen to this podcast. Welcome to Heaven. Enjoy.

Episode 129: Beaker Face

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 16 Mar 2012 12:00:00 -0400

A LOT went down on this episode so here are some key words and phrases to help guide you along on this majestical ear-quest: sushi sucks, the joy of browsing independent video game/nerd stores, Background Noise drinking games (yelling at strangers, making faces like Beaker from The Muppets at pretty girls), all that went down with the NBA trade deadline, solving the mystery of Carlos Boozer's hair (spray-on hair in a can?!?!), a look at the top 7 face transplants ever done, how make-up ruins or makes women (stop drawing eyebrows on, stupid!), stupid faces people make when they sleep, the rehabilitation of a man who stabbed his two children 46 times (is rehabilitation even possible?), how technology brings us together AND keeps us apart (WHOA MAN! TRIPPY!), and the desensitization and over-stimulation of mankind. What a damn show! You might have to listen to this one twice! Or thrice! Or fice! Or...well, I guess fice would be next again, but whatever. Just shut-up and listen. Background Noise - PUT THIS IN YOUR EARS AND SMOKE IT!

Episode 128: Wario at War

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 9 Mar 2012 12:00:00 -0400

In the first segment of this episode we discussed the Anonamyss album release/Masta Ace show that we were fortunate enough to host. We talked about the rehearsals, the local talent, the venue & atmosphere, and everything else that had to do with it. After that, all Hell broke lose! We debated about Rush Limbaugh calling that woman a slut (did he go too far?), discussed Kirk Cameron"s unacceptance of homosexuality (and the idea of "unacceptance" in general), and shared our thoughts & beliefs about the Kony 2012 movement. We even took the time to look at some baseball-card style profiles of wanted Iraqi terrorists, including a very special man who looks like a real life Wario. Get in our van. We have puppies. Let us touch you...r lives.

Episode 127: Sex Grenades

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 2 Mar 2012 12:00:00 -0400

On tonight's show we learned about a new ray-gun that shuts people up when it's shot at them. For real. It exists. We also invented a weapon called the "sex grenade", which when thrown into an area, causes everyone nearby to start sexually having sexual sex with each other. What sort of problems could that cause? Well, listen and learn. What else? Well, Derrek ranted about the general shittiness of politics, and we discussed the controversies that may surround a gay UFC fighter. Then we tried to sort out which is "better" - Apple or Poland. We also talked about racial preference when it comes to women, and each of chose which race we would pick if we were only allowed to date/make sweet lovings to one of them. There's all kinds of other stuff in there, too, but listen and find out for yourself, you jerks. You've been eating long enough now, stop being greedy. Keep it real patna. Give to the needy. Your ears. Like Diablo. Give them to us.

Episode 126: Bouncin' Back

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 24 Feb 2012 12:00:00 -0400

This episode of Background Noise focused heavily on inspiration. We went over some of our favorite quotes, discussed the people and types of things that inspire us, and shared ideas in regards to how a person can turn awful situations into better ones. We also discussed some of the times that we felt THE WORST in life, and how we bounced back and/or continue to deal with it today. Oh, and then there was the story about the guy from Seinfeld who shot himself in the head and survived (George's boss, Kruger). It wasn't all so serious, though. The amazingness that is laughter came up as a topic and we also discussed Rainn Wilson's Twitter trouble, as well as CM Punk & Chris Brown's Twitter tussle. Lastly, in the third segment of the show we played the card game "Man Bites Dog". Background Noise is a pretty addictive drug, so snort us, smoke us, pop us, inject us or do what you will, JUST BE WARNED.

Episode 125: Victor Malarkey

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 17 Feb 2012 12:00:00 -0400

Self-proclaimed (on her Twitter bio @firecatkitty) "sex worker advocate & anti-poverty activist, researcher, condom fairy & social justice crime fighter", Rene Ross, was in studio for this episode to teach us all about sex workers and the sex trade. She also helped us as we tackled all of the exciting news as of late: Whitney Houston's death, Jeremy Lin's rise to super-stardom in the NBA (we Skyped in our friend Tom, who is currently living in Taiwan, and he told us about the pandemomium going on over there), the Grammys (Nicki Minaj's stunt and everything else that went on), and we even had an educational & earnest discussion about how clean a woman's vagina should be and how she should go about cleaning it. On what other show will you see a line-up of topics like this? None. That's why you love us or hate us, so let us into your ears so that our words can tapdance on your brain and hit your good spots. Pause.

Episode 124: Come Hither

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 10 Feb 2012 12:00:00 -0400

It's the Valentine's Day Special and Lola is back to help teach us all about love, sex & that gushy stuff! She also helped us to answer questions from our listeners. Some of the topics covered on this episode include: BDSM, cheating, how to get your partner to try new things in the bedroom (or wherever you juice), whether or not you can get over that ONE thing that annoys you about your partner, using food during sex, how men feel about a women who has a chest full of sex toys, what female ejaculation is made of, whether a person's "body count" (the number of people they've slept with) matters and LOTS of other interesting stuff! We took some intriguing phone calls from our listeners, too, so don't miss out on this extremely spicy dish! WILL YOU BE OUR VALENTINE? PLEEEEEEASE? *pulls out a knife* Be our God damn Valentine.

Episode 123: The Triforce

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 3 Feb 2012 12:00:00 -0400

The post-Jon era begins, as our little cherub has left the show to focus on some behind-the-scenes work (the website & such). The Triforce of Luke, Devin & Derrek remains strong, however, and the soul of Background Noise still burns! On this episode we paid respects to Soul Train legend Don Cornelius. Also, there was a discussion about the Halifax bus strike, insider info from Devin about the Diablo 3 beta, a chat about Morgan Freeman's fetish for young tenderonis (as well as how young of a woman each of us would date/have sex with), and the sharing of some heart-warming Reddit stories. Oh, there were also a couple of Fushigis whirling about all willy-nilly throughout the episode, and we watched & discussed some trailers for movies that are coming out in February & March (3 Stooges, Ghost Rider & more). Strap on your seatbelt! Why? Because...HIIIGHWAAAY TOOO THEEE BACKGROUND NOOOISE!

Episode 122: Trouble's A'Bruin

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 27 Jan 2012 12:00:00 -0400

This week Dev & Derrek talked about their experience at PodCamp Halifax, and Derrek put us all up on Geeks vs. Nerds, which is a unique monthly event that goes on in Halifax. We also talked about Luke's vlogs, Boston Bruins' goalie Tim Thomas' decision to not go to the White House with the rest of his team to celebrate last year's Stanley Cup victory (is he right or wrong for that?), how Pokemon would be used as household products, Asian medicine (grinding up exotic animal dicks into powder, basically), and ridiculously expensive foods. All this & more, only on Background Noise...unless someone is jacking our weekly show and re-doing it with their own voices. Assholes.

Episode 121: 1 Million Diamonds

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 20 Jan 2012 12:00:00 -0400

What do we do when Luke is sick and cannot make the show? We ask a ringer to step in. That ringer is known only to the world as "Tom". We put on our helmets and scientist goggles as we discuss the new rule in LA porn circles: porn stars MUST wear a condom! Who wants to masturbate to that malarky!? Also, we discuss a horrible article claiming that men MAY fib to get in a girl's kissy sex zone! WHAT!? In more devastating news, a cruise shit (ship?) is sinking near Italy, and it could have been prevented should a certain action hero have been on board. Which action hero could save humans from such a catastrophe? Let me think, MARKY MARK, obviously. Then Jon barrages us with a plethora of questions in the style of "would you rather ? or ?", and shares a sexy story he found on the internet with us. We take turns reading this wonderful magical story that can be best described as an orgy with Harry Potter characters and various stripping Lord of the Rings characters. We wrap the weeks news up and sprinkle a little fluffydust all over it too. Get your straws out, and lets do some lines... of passion.

Episode 120: Gaping

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 13 Jan 2012 12:00:00 -0400

This week, Bermuda-born, Haligonian graphic designer and fashion entrepreneur Duane Jones - AKA @D_Glitterati on Twitter - joined us in studio to talk about his work, life and creations. He also schooled us on Bermuda, so take out your pen & paper and prepare to take notes! Other stuff: Ever wonder who the "MMMMMMMMMMAYBACH MUSIC!" woman is? Well, we have the legit answer! We also discussed a woman who coughed up her cancer, talked about Bey & Jay's baby and all the rumors (Illuminati stuff, etc.), re-capped the Twitter war that Derrek started, and shared a story about Nas' hostages...well, they're not really his hostages, but kinda. You'll have to listen to get it. We also created a new website and one of our listeners photoshopped a picture to go along with it. HILARITY ENSUED. Oh, and by the way, we announced a new contest, too - WHO CAN DRAW THE BEST HAND TURKEY?! Draw yours up, use glitter, googly eyes - whatever - just get creative, post it up on our Facebook page, and you may be eligible to win a prize! Very busy episode this week!

Episode 119: Lola the Sexpert

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 06 Jan 2012 12:00:00 -0400

This week the lovely, English-accented, sex & relationships expert Lola joined us in studio to help answer some listener questions about sex, love & relationships! How do you get out of the friend zone? How do you help a woman get her rocks off? How do the Background Noise boys make love to women? When is too soon for a woman to put out? How do you go from just seeing each other to a formal relationship? These and other questions were answered, so grab your Vaseline, light some candles & incense, and listen up! It's the hottest & sexiest episode of Background Noise yet! Use protection as you listen, and please call us the next day, okay? We are NOT sluts (okay, maybe Jon is).

Episode 118: Rise of the Listeners

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 30 Dec 2011 12:00:00 -0400

Strap on a party hat and light up some sprinklers, 'cuz it's the year end special of Background Noise! Join us as we take a look back at some of the biggest news stories from 2011, as well as the best and worst of movies, music and other things. Helping us along on this episode were a bunch of our listeners, who Skyped in to share with us their thoughts, ideas & opinions; levels of realness that were once unknown were reached. The world might end once 2012 hits, so hurry up and check this episode out! That way your life will not have been lived in vain. It will have been lived listening to 3 jerkwads (Jon was away big game hunting in Kenya), and that's okay, man.

Episode 117: Dudegay

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 23 Dec 2011 12:00:00 -0400

It's pretty clear that Christmas is near when you look at the topics from this week's show (not really). It all kicked off with talk about the deaths of Kim Jong Il (what happens with Korea now?), Slim Dunkin (how to avoid getting shot) and Christopher Hitchens (who the hell is that?). From there, a discussion/rant about the sensitivity and censorship issues surrounding homosexual and transgender issues came up. You will listen and agree or be mad; either way, it'll give you something to think about and talk about. On the lighter side of things, we talked about the World Masturbation Champion from Japan, porno-watching woes, the magic of bidets, and the difficulties that can arise when one has a boner. Finish it all off with a sexy story that may or may not involve Santa having sex with a sleepy-eyed man and you have yourself a festive episode that will make your Christmas-time warmer than your belly after 7 rum & egg nogs. Happy Holidays!

Episode 116: Wine Down

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 16 Dec 2011 12:00:00 -0400

Background Noise is back to hit you in your ears like a bazooka blast! KAPOOOOOOOOW! This week, rapper P. Cain was in studio to talk about his upcoming album, "A Day In The Life"! We also played a game where a statement was read, and then we all had to guess whether it came from a piece of writing in a men's magazine or was said by a rapist. #1 fan Ashley Rose gave us Christmas gifts to open on-air, too, and we took a look at the 2011 Video Game Awards. We're pretty much the fountain of youth. So bathe in us, won't you? WON'T YOU?!?!?!

Episode 115: Trousers - Remove Them

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 9 Dec 2011 12:00:00 -0400

This episode is so fun & educational that Bill Nye AND Beakman would listen and become astounded. There was talk of car accidents, the ridiculous things that various rap stars and pop stars expect in their dressing room before a show (we also talked about what we would want), and a list of "Christmas Work Party Dos and Don'ts". If that's not enough to make you hot and bothered in the pants, we also discussed the most important and influential games from the good ol' NES days, up to and including PS1! Why are you still reading this with your eyes? You should be listening with your ears. Go. Now! It's dangerous to go alone! Take this (episode of Background Noise) with you!

Episode 114: Aladdin, the Original Twink

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 1 Dec 2011 12:00:00 -0400

This week on Background Noise we honoured one of our greatest inspirations & influences, whom has just passed away recently: comedian & genius, Patrice O'Neal. After that we discussed scandalous women and the various whore tricks that we've been subjected to over the years, so if you're a "Ghost of Whore's Past", you might not want to listen. But really, the highlight of this episode, especially for you nerdy sorts, is when we created our own "fighting game" and chose our favorite fighters, including Predator, Invader Zim & Gir, Lion-O, Skeletor, Uncle Phil, Peter Venkman, Indiana Jones, and a bunch of others. It was a discussion so good that it might make you slap your mama, so if you live with her still, make sure that she's not too close by when you listen.

Episode 113: Noise-o-Vision

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 25 Nov 2011 12:00:00 -0400

Last week we went heavy with the video games, so this week we balanced it out with some basketball talk (lockout, what's going on in the off-season), movie talk (Hangover 2, Bad Teacher, Beginners) and hip-hop talk! Local hip-hop trailblazers Ambition & Uncle Fester were in studio to talk with us about their music & plans, the local scene (artists, upcoming releases, etc.), major label releases, who is changing the game, etc. We also watched Background Noise's local television debut live on-air. We're big stars now so appreciate us like the ones that you used to collect in Mario 64. We're an awesome video game for your ears, so pick up your controllers and play... with... us... wait, what?

Episode 112: Lottery Cops

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 18 Nov 2011 12:00:00 -0400

Here's a breakdown of highlights from this stellar episode: a re-cap of the amazingness that was Hal-Con 2011, the BC teens who got in trouble for "trolling sexual predators", more "Occupy Halifax" talk (including stuff about the hatred for Mayor Peter Kelly), a review of the new Elder Scrolls game "Skyrim," annoying pop-up ads, fake links on Facebook, & Livejasmin, the Halifax masseuse who was jerking off on his clients, and a fascinating new idea about how police officers should be chosen. Pour yourself some wine and sprawl out on a bearskin rug by the fireplace because we're about to make love to your ears!

Episode 111: Coach Slippyfist

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 11 Nov 2011 11:11:11 -1100

Michael McPhee & Annie Valentina from "The Doppler Effect Productions" joined us on this episode to talk about acting, writing plays & the art of theatre. Shit got really real. We also went through a slew of RIPs and discussed them briefly (Heavy D, Joe Frazier, Andy Rooney, Bil Keane), and read over some of Mr. Keane's HILARIOUS Family Circus comics. Oh. Oops. I meant to say completely awful Family Circus comics. ... and that's not all! We also discussed the Penn State/Paterno situation, and in the world of censorship, we talked about Brett Ratner riling the whole world up by saying a word that rhymes with Sagat. Then at one point the idea of Pokemon having sex organs came up, which led us to searching Google for the truth. Do you want to find out the truth? I thought so. Shovel us into your ears to keep your brain burning!

Episode 110: Alabama Sludge Hustle

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 4 Nov 2011 12:00:00 -0400

Did Justin Bieber get a woman pregnant? Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries didn't last? How was "Human Centipede 2?" Can you judge people based off of their "heroes?" Have the miracles of the 21st century made us lazy and miserable? Does having shitty friends make a person more shitty? What are some new sex positions? Okay. Easy with the questions. All of these and more are answered in this episode of Background Noise, so give us an A+ by listening to the words coming out of our mouths as they spiral into your ears and burrow into your brain.

Episode 109: Horse Play

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 28 Oct 2011 12:00:00 -0400

BOO! Sorry to startle you, but here is a spooktacular episode of Background Noise.... Although if you missed the live video show you missed all of the creepy costumes, so... that'll teach you to watch next time! Our guest was Halloway Jones of the band Hind Legs, who shared with us secrets, stories & information that will make you question your own heart & soul. Discussion topics included: Halloween and everything about it, our goals to support local arts & entertainment, how local media seems to work, the on-line ad campaign about offensive/racist costumes, a man who beat a woman down with a frozen armadillo, and whether or not porn effects a man's libido. We also took a look at some disturbing pictures and discussed a man who collects various, and sometimes animalistic, sex dolls. It's getting chilly out there, work is boring, and homework/studying sucks. Put us on in the background and live a more fulfilling life.

Episode 108: Stay Wet

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 12:00:00 -0400

Ghadafi got killed by rebels, Dan Wheldon died on the racetrack, and a 2 year old Chinese girl got ran over, ignored and left for dead. Okay, now that the morbid stuff from this week's show is out of the way...BOY OH BOY! WHAT A SHOW IT WAS! There was an in-depth debate about TV shows and movies (what's better; what current series are good; what holds a person's attention more, etc.), and an open & honest discussion about the silly things that some women say, plutonic friends, and whether or not wanting to have sex with those plutonic friends is acceptable/reasonable/expected. We also made a list of athlete porno names (Plow Gasol, Russell Chestbrook, Udonis Handsome - to name a few), and then Devin & Jon were quizzed on 10 hip-hop slang words. They failed miserably and there was much rejoicing. On top of all that we took a look at a story where a father punished his daughter by sword-fighting her like knights do, and then we came up with an idea for a potential sitcom that revolves around a knight who works in an office. If none of this gets your attention, chances are that you're VERY uninteresting. Listen to our show and get fixed; change yourself for the better.

Episode 107: Occupy Airwaves

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 14 Oct 2011 12:00:00 -0400

On this episode we talked about the creative process and all of the hardships that come along with it (forming ideas, sharing ideas, trying to take it to the next level). We also touched on the "Occupy Wall Street" movement and a lot of technological stuff (Blackberry's recent woes, why wireless internet connections are so shaky & why torrents sap the life out of your computer). Mix in a discussion about porn parodies and whether or not cartoon characters have sex with each other and you've got a show so balanced it makes the Libra scale jealous. Where else can you hear discussions like this all in one place? That's right - NOWHERE! Maybe in Dimension X, but you'd have to ask Krang about that.

Episode 106: Skanksgiving

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 7 Oct 2011 12:00:00 -0400

This episode is delicious, interesting & good for you. Basically, it's a heaping bag of trail-mix. We opened with a discussion about Steve Jobs and Macs vs. PC, which then lead us to take a look at some of the new video games that are out/about to come out (the new GTA, Rage, Battlefield, Modern Warfare 3, NBA2K12, etc.). After that, we celebrated "Skanksgiving." ...or in other words, we had an open & honest conversation about women, relationships, arguing/debating, trust issues, and all that good stuff that comes along with being a human being! You're REALLY gonna like this one. *pops out a switchblade* Aren't ya? *backs you into a corner* Yeah, that's what I thought.

Episode 105: Breaking Records

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 30 Sep 2011 12:00:00 -0400

The star of this episode is Crazy Mister Twister from Take Part. He's wasn't on the show, he just came up as a topic somehow... but you know who WAS on the show? Two of the girls from the band, Like A Motorcycle! They talked to us about their newest album release, shared some tour stories, and laughed with us. A LOT. We also discussed the Nova Scotia man who is trying to get into the Guinness Book of World Records for juggling chainsaws, and played an on-line game about poverty called, "Spent." Did we survive, or end up lying in a gutter offering handjobs for handfuls of change? Listen through to find out!

Episode 104: Texas Bowtie

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 23 Sep 2011 12:00:00 -0400

You'd have to be a pretty big jerk to steal $120,000 from a dying little girl, right? And a big jerk to troll Facebook memorials for dead people by posting photoshopped pictures of them with crosses in their eyes and captions that read, "mummy, it's hot in Hell," right? Yeah, I thought so. Those are just two of the stories on this 104th - 2 year anniversary - show! We also had Jason Szeto of Last Call Chernobyl on to discuss his musical adventures, play some acoustic guitar for us, and talk about how awful the radio and the music industry is. Top it off with a look at the Charlie Sheen roast and you have yourself a show so piping hot that it makes jalapeno peppers say, "whoa man."

Episode 103: Boobies, Badgers, and Midgets

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 16 Sep 2011 12:00:00 -0400

The week leading up to this episode was pretty whacky! It came out that Sarah Palin slept with NBA All-Star Glen Rice back in the day, Scarlett Johansson's succulent titty pictures leaked onto the internet, a midget who was a pornstar AND a Gordon Ramsey look-alike got eaten by a badger, a weatherman woke up in a hot tub with a dead man wearing a dog collar, and that wasn't ALL! Tune in to hear these tales and to find out whose balls swing like Simon Belmont from Castlevania when he uses his whip! What a horrible night to have a curse...but a wicked time to listen to some Background Noise!

Episode 102: POOF!

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 9 Sep 2011 12:00:00 -0400

This episode kicked off with a very in-depth and controversial discussion about censorship, words you "can and can't" say, and the general pussification of society. There's also a story about a "Twitter beef" and a "Red State" movie review, as well as more magic than a barrage of Magic Missiles firing at your face on another plane of existence...so...yeah...think about THAT. PUT THIS PODCAST IN YOUR EARS AND SMOKE IT!

Episode 101: HIV Infected Porcupines

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 2 Sep 2011 12:00:00 -0400

It's the 101st episode of Background Noise, so in order to celebrate we had 101 dalmatians in studio! Okay, we didn't, but this was the 1st episode that was recorded in our new headquarters, and that's kind of exciting, right? Anyway, we discussed the VMAs, a scientific study that made monkeys into & chimp pimps, the interesting documentary "King of Kong", a woman who made a security fence out of HIV needles, and we might have even shared with you our world famous marinara sauce reciple. MAYBE. I guess you'll have to listen to find out.

Episode 100: 100 Weeks of Noise

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Sat, 27 Aug 2011 12:00:00 -0400

For episode 100 we wanted to have a celebration so this was our first episode with a live studio audience! Many laughs were had by all and a lot of alcohol was consumed. Be prepared for some rambling, fighting, cheering, and laughter of course. To add to the excitement we even had Nick and Justin from Luchador Proper in studio painting a sweet robot while the podcast was being recorded. All in all an amazing night and a great centennial episode. Even if the drunken antics prove to be a distraction, we all hope you enjoy our celebration.

Episode 99: Humpin' Pumpkins

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 19 Aug 2011 12:00:00 -0400

TV kills you, great white sharks are being found where they shouldn't be, old broads are 10th degree judo masters, and looking for love makes you dumb. Basically, you don't have much of a chance in this life. Damn, this write up is really sad...so...I guess that you should just like, listen to as much Background Noise as you can because it's the #1 treatment for sadness, depression, and bitchassedness.

Episode 98: What a Riot

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 12 Aug 2011 12:00:00 -0400

Greetings, Earthlings and intergalactic alien travelers! This time around we had a "no swearing" episode, where those who committed the offense of speaking with a foul tongue were whacked with foam swords and forced to drink flaming hot tabasco sauce and sour lemon juice. Naturally, there were a couple of fuc...uuuuh..."slip ups" which resulted in punishment. Also, long-time listener Billy "Redneck Name" Floyd from the UK Skyped in to give us the inside scoop on the London Riots, we talked about the awkwardness and etiquette of passing people on sidewalks, and reviewed Jay-Z & Kanye West's new album, "Watch the Throne". Put on your riot gear, get comfortable, listen up, and let us loot your hearts, you geezers and wankers!

Episode 97: Making Scents

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 5 Aug 2011 12:00:00 -0400

What do white people smell like? And how about black people...and Asians, Indians, First Nations, and Mexicans? All important questions - and all answered on this week's show! We also bumbled our way through figuring out how dress sizes work due to a so-called "plus-sized" model who is just downright sexy and not fat, and we talked about how annoying people can be in public when they're being loudmouths...or are walking around with awful ringtones. Oh, and Nitro (from American Gladiators) was in studio. Okay, not really, but that would've been pretty cool, right? Right. Of course.

Episode 96: Joking With You

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 29 Jul 2011 12:00:00 -0400

A former rap partner and longtime friend of Luke, Mike, was in studio for this episode to talk about his new musical group called Drugz N Dreamz. He also had to grin and bear it as two, 12 year old songs that he did with Luke (when they were known as the rap group "Undarunnaz") were played back and then comedically annihilated. Not to be outdone, White Ass Jon also dropped some blazing hot bars, as he performed his own rendition of "Smell Yo Di..." by Riskay. This is an episode of drugs and music, so crank up your speakers and shoot up! Don't shoot PEOPLE up - shoot the podcast up! Wait, no...don't do that either...we don't wanna die...look, just listen to the show and like it, okay?

Episode 95: Captain Planet Casting Couch

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 22 Jul 2011 12:00:00 -0400

Comedian Kyle Hickey was in studio for this episode so shake your tambourines and go and get yourself a whistle! He shares with us his past, current & future plans, and also helps us cast actors for a live-action Captain Planet movie. Then there's the tantalizing discussion about Bang Bus pornstar Ramon's animal cruelty, and a look at the story of a local man who recently got duped out of $14,000 because he chose to believe in loving an on-line stranger. Forget going to the library, ya dweebs - just listen to Background Noise and feel the brain magic happen.

Episode 94: Caterpillar Tails

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 15 Jul 2011 12:00:00 -0400

It's mean in the streets of Halifax... but especially on the transit buses, when there's 6 single mothers with baby strollers. We discuss the showdown on the bus route #52 that took place, as well as 9 things you shouldn't say to your child for fear of destroying their happiness. We also warn you that robbing a hair salon MAY result in you being a Russian woman's sex slave. There's more sexy stuff, and some death too. HOW BIZARRE! Climb into a barrel and fly off the waterfalls of promise in this weeks Background Noise!!

Episode 93: Handjob at Tiffany's

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 8 Jul 2011 12:00:00 -0400

The verdict is in! Background Noise has been found guilty of being incredible...well, pretty good, anyway! In other news, Casey Anthony has been found innocent of murder, so naturally, the trial and verdict was discussed on this episode! Add to that the creation of the "Top 10 Most Overrated Things" list with the help of our listeners, and a look at some gender bending stories, and you have yourself one hell of a cookout! Smother us in BBQ sauce and enjoy. We go good with just about anything.

Episode 92: Alligator Expectations

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 1 Jul 2011 12:00:00 -0400

Derrek tries to switch things up this week by trying to intro the show and what a show it is! You ever try to debate something with an illogical person? Luke did this week and tells us all the juicy details. Additionally we decide just how much we think some insane celebrity items are worth, talk about Halifax and it's continuing issues with concerts oh and some guy who likes to camp out in a portable toilet. Ponder, laugh, and cringe your way through this amazing episode of Background Noise.

Episode 91: Titty Gauntlet

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 24 Jun 2011 12:00:00 -0400

Metal band Orchid's Curse was on this week to discuss their upcoming video release, to tell us what they're all about, and to play a game of "How Metal Is This?". Also, Jon returned from his Euro-trip with many stories to share! Ryan Dunn's death and all of the controversy surrounding it was touched on as well, and then there was a talk about puke and puking. Yup. Only the high class stuff around these parts! Adjust your monocle and pour your tea, it's BACKGROUND NOISE!

Episode 90: Deaths, Riots & Rock n' Roll

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 17 Jun 2011 12:00:00 -0400

It's episode 90 all up in your ears! The countdown to the big 100 is on! On this week's show, Rick (AKA Rock) Johnson of Chaos Theory (and many other bands) stopped by to tell us all about his musical endeavors and the upcoming battle for the opening spot at a Metallica show! There was also a great discussion about the Vancouver riots, the invention of a product called the "dicky douche", and a deep & insightful discourse about the introverted way of life. You'll laugh, you'll learn, and you MIGHT even pee a little, so just be aware of that, okay?

Episode 89: Big Fat Juicy Talks

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 10 Jun 2011 12:00:00 -0400

We're trying to come up with a slogan for the show. Did we succeed? Well, listen to this episode as we list off a bunch of the ones that our listeners sent in! We also discussed a father who embarasses his son EVERY morning before school with his fabulous costume collection, took a test to see which one of us is most likely to become a serial killer, looked at a story about a creepy old lady who likes to spy on people having sex, and discussed some of the excitement that went on at E3! Is there a void in your life? If so, we might be the religon for you. No pamphlets...just podcasts! Blessed art thou, my children!

Episode 88: Full House

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 3 Jun 2011 12:00:00 -0400

This time around Background Noise Headquarters were packed! Four of the five members of Three Sheet were on the show to discuss their group history, new album, and to give us a sneak peek of their new music! Also, Ashley King from Haligonia.ca was a one man studio audience! Discussion topics include a ban on porn in Tunisia, ridiculous storylines in porn, a REAL powerglove, a juggalo who took a single punch from a girl and died, and a new pill that can help erase memories. So there you have it - an interview, some dirty talk, interesting stories, and even some intellectual discussion. What more could you ask for? Okay...lots...but just zip your lips and listen, you saucy devils!

Episode 87: Crazy Rainbow

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 27 May 2011 12:00:00 -0400

A couple of artistic Luchadors were in studio this week to help discuss some very important and serious topics including: The R-Word, A random seal adventure, kids getting life in prison and mass murder of butterflies. All of this is explained in VERY graphic and intense detail, so if you have a strong imagination I warn you now, you will most likely have some pretty crazy images floating around in your head after listening to this episode.

Episode 86: Heaven is a Picnic Table

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 20 May 2011 12:00:00 -0400

You know the world in Super Mario Bros. 3 where everything is really big? Remember how mind-blowing it is? Well, Background Noise is kinda like THAT. On this episode we share with you an original list of "who to hide from your Facebook feed", discuss a teacher who had orgies with her students, learn about a woman with a disorder that requires her to masturbate a ridiculous amount of times a day, and MORE. I know, it's always "and more"...it just works, so deal with it, okay? You just hit a block and got a leaf. Use your raccoon powers to fly away with us!

Episode 85: BOWELing Alley

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 13 May 2011 12:00:00 -0400

This week Luke returns from his trip to share his experiences & thoughts in regards to the Dominican Republic, airplanes, airports, weddings & more! Then, an interesting discussion about why and where the male G-spot should be moved to comes up...but that's only after a story about a drunk man who cut his friend's penis off with a samurai sword is dissected and looked at. Top it off with a story about a girl who took a long, single poop down a bowling alley, and the list of video games that made it into the Smithsonian, and you got yourself a hell of a cookout, partner! YEEEEEEHAW! Throw your cowboy hats up and shoot them 'cuz they look stupid, and then sit down and enjoy some Background Noise!

Episode 84: Bin Laden Beach Volleyball

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 6 May 2011 12:00:00 -0400

Where oh where has our little Luke gone? He's gone on vacation, leaving the reigns to three honkies with attitudes! We catch you up on the Osama Bin Laden situation in Pakistan, as well as his secret crush! OoOOoo!! We rode the POLL for the first time in months with fake quotes from legendary figures, a NINJA returned again this week (dayum!), a little about UFC 129 and Sony's PSN hackings and lawsuit. Also, we read a giant list of swear words you may or may not have ever heard of. Come to our secret island, sexy lover.

Episode 83: Scrotes

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 29 Apr 2011 12:00:00 -0400

This is the most educational episode of Background Noise yet! You can play at home as Dev & Jon unleash a barrage of trivia questions for Derrek & Luke to try to answer. There is also talk about a neighbourhood NINJA, a human cannonball who didn't do too well, a drive-thru funeral, our very first CDs (as well as the death of the man who invented them), a naked gym, some UK scrotes who ran up on a SAS squad by mistake, and more whackiness than you can shake a stick at! Get your shaking sticks out folks, because you're gonna be busy!

Episode 82: Mercury Sprinkler

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 22 Apr 2011 12:00:00 -0400

FIRE!!! That's right, this episode actually started with us being kicked out by a fire marshal. But don't worry, the show still went on!!! We discussed Jesus teleporting, Cadbury Cream Eggs shrinking, and 4/20. There was also a heated debate about whether or not words "actually hurt" and a fun game that involved Devin and Jon rating their anxiety level while being shit on by the band Abba, as well as other stressful situations. Bon Voyage, you're about to go on an amazing journey!!!

Episode 81: 5 Angry Men

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 15 Apr 2011 12:00:00 -0400

Canadian rapper Spesh K stopped by the studio for this episode to talk about his touring, music ventures, the state of hip-hop (independence, labels, mixtapes) and more! We also took a look at the recent debate (Canadian politics), discussed the 6 year old who got searched and patted down at an airport, and tried to decide if Ashley Judd is a misunderstood woman, or a blabbering skank because of her recent, negative comments about hip-hop music. We give you laughs, we give you opinions, and if we could, we'd give you a nice, piping slice of pizza...but for now, eat our show with your ears!

Episode 80: SLUTS.

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 8 Apr 2011 12:00:00 -0400

This is the sluttiest Background Noise episode of all-time! Not only did we take a look at the recent "slut march" in Toronto, we also discussed the definition of the word "slut" and learned where it is derived from. Other hot topics include: stress & "busy people"; a raging 8 year old who got pepper sprayed; a controversial, retarded wrestler; and a bad, bad man by the name of Dr. Pepper.

Episode 79: Touch Your Toes

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 1 Apr 2011 12:00:00 -0400

SPLADOW! Background Noise is in full, fresh, funky effect! Discussion topics this week include haterism, Michael Cole's Twitter faux pas, a gay wrestling league, elephant hunting, the relationship between business & ethics, and an in-depth look at the SUPREME WARRIORS that our listeners sent in for our contest! Listen up to find out who won the gold & the glory!

Episode 78: Danish Art Club

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 25 Mar 2011 12:00:00 -0400

This week's show began with a chat about the season change & SAD(seasonal affective disorder). From there, the boys went on to discuss a 240 hour long movie, a woman suing her fiance because he cheated, the trend of religion fading away all over the world, and a batty lady who gives her 8 year old daughter botox injections (among other things) so that she's pretty. Oh, crabwalking vaginas skittering about inside of the Pearly Gates also came up as a topic...and a wrestling tag team known as "The Twitterers". Yup. Only here folks, only here.

Episode 77: Rants!

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 18 Mar 2011 12:00:00 -0400

Things were kept pretty simple this week on Background Noise! Between the death of hip-hop legend Nate Dogg, the earthquake & tsunami in Japan, and Mike Tyson's appearance on Ellen (as well as his genius and insanity overall), there was little else to be squeezed in! If you're a person with any sense (sight, taste, smell, touch & hearing), you'll definitely enjoy this episode. If not, well...I guess it won't be any worse than the complete nothingness that you're used to, so give it a shot anyway!

Episode 76: Black Moor Noise

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 11 Mar 2011 12:00:00 -0400

Heavy metal heavyweights (they're not fat, just good at what they do) Erik Hanlin & Sylvain Coderre from Black Moor were in studio for this episode! Tune in to hear about their history, music, and upcoming album & tour dates! As for stories, we discussed annoying pop-ups on pornsites, the problem with Hungry Man Dinners, a baby thief (someone who tried to steal an unborn baby, not a toddler with a mask & a six-shooter), old peoples' genitals being taken advantage of, and a list of ridiculous bans in Wisconsin. This episode was forged with blood, steel, harpy claws, and laugh attacks.

Episode 75: Zombie Enthusiast

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 4 Mar 2011 12:00:00 -0400

If you're a fan of movies, especially horrors & thrillers, then this episode of Background Noise is for YOU! Local horror movie director & film buff, Colin MacDonald, stopped by to discuss some of his film projects & adventures, and then what followed was a discussion that covered favorite movies, disturbing movies, the good, the bad & the ugly of special effects/CGI, behind-the-scenes footage, and other movie related topics! We also touched on a story about a "whites only scholarship", and briefly talked about how certain social situations are awful. This episode isn't awful though. NOPE! It's good like the heart of a holy angel from Heaven.

Episode 74: Supreme Warrior Challenge

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 25 Feb 2011 12:00:00 -0400

Just so you know, Background Noise is the only podcast where you will hear talk about pirates, Pirate cookies, drawing ninjas/knights/dragons/etc. as kids, gangsta bears scheming on menstruating women, Corky from Life Goes On, philosophy on women & relationships, and other legendary things all in one episode. That said, you should listen to it and have all of your funny bones tickled and all of your silly muscles massaged. Relax. You're tense.

Episode 73: Gold Star

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 18 Feb 2011 12:00:00 -0400

Floyd joins the crew once again this episode...and there was much rejoicing. If you listen close enough, you might even see her boobs; listen backwards and you'll see four sets of balls. Anyway...what went down this week, you ask? Well, there was the Grammy's, the computer named Watson who smashed his opponents on Jeopardy, a discussion on proper hygiene practices for the genitals area, and even a couple of lessons about lesbianism and lesbian "slang". We even received some awesome gifts! TUNE IN THE FUTURE IS NOOOOOOOOW.

Episode 72: The Amazing Gaaaash

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 11 Feb 2011 12:00:00 -0400

Valentine's Day is right around the corner so this episode is even sexier than usual! It basically has double Ds and is wearing a string bikini. This episode features some of Derrek's old MSN chat logs with women, a love, sex & relationships Q&A with our listeners, the answer to what men want out of women on Valentine's Day (we narrowed it down to two things), a stunning rendition of "Kiss From A Rose", and a sexy story that may or may not involve Pokemon. Light some candles, make a bubblebath, and drink wine until your smashed... then listen to this episode and touch yourself some. It's okay... it's only natural. Don't fight your feelings!

Episode 71: Vanessa / Three Sheet

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 04 Feb 2011 12:00:00 -0400

This week's episode of Background Noise features Vanessa Furlong from Three Sheet! That's really all that needs to be said, but let's go a bit deeper! We had a story about a single man who fought off 40 would-be rapists, a Black History Month inspired discussion, a couple of silly videos, and enough laughs to fit in all 4 of your buckets, ya creeps! Take on us and take us on! Just make sure you wear protection.

Episode 070: Threesome Fun

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 28 Jan 2011 12:00:00 -0400

Put on your lipstick and pucker up - Background Noise is here to rock you like a hurricane and pour some sugar on you! In episode 70 we discuss the death of a flaming superhero, the new way that you may be charged for using the internet, a man fired for wearing a Packers tie, an absolutely ridiculous lawsuit against Diddy, and a video that shows a man blasting a machine gun at some skateboard punks. Oh yeah, we also play a sexy on-line game where you have to try to lure two babes into having sex with you. It was...well, it was SEXY...and graphic...TURBO GRAPHX 16!

Episode 069: 98% Don't have the Guts

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 21 Jan 2011 12:00:00 -0400

This episode of Background Noise is so hard that Cyborg Dr. Dre scowls & nods his head in approval! This week that whole "new Zodiac thing" is explained, a Woolly Mammoth crashes into the studio, and a certain someone FUMES over threatening Facebook statuses that may or may not involve percentiles (they do). Other stories discussed include the dumbo that fell into the fountain while texting, Regis' retirement, a fox that shot a man, and Ricky Gervais comedically-raping the Golden Globes! Here ye here ye! Your knights in shining armor are here...ye.

Episode 068: Phoenix Jones & Arizona

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 14 Jan 2011 12:00:00 -0400

The Background Noise boys aren't the only superheroes out there, you know. There's this character named Phoenix Jones and he means BUSINESS...much like the madman who was shooting all over the place in Arizona! Other hot topics this week include the Creepy Crawlers cartoon (how did that kid get away with all those shenanigans?!), a drunk redneck operating a skyjack out on the open road, the explanation as to why all of these birds are dropping out of the skies, a criminal Kinder Surprise, and more stuff that you won't hear anywhere else but here! ORDER UP! This episode is piping hot!

Episode 067: Spare Sushi

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 07 Jan 2011 12:00:00 -0400

Thousands of birds & fish across the land are dying unexpectedly...but don't worry gumshoes, Background Noise is on the case! We're also on the case of a fat slob who ate a 30,000 calorie meal in 2 hours, and on the case of whether or not &the N-word& should be taken out of classic literature; it was quite the discussion! There's also talk about classic video games, a raging and seemingly invincible cow, and the unexplainable madness that is the Super Mario Bros. movie. Get your news, get your laughs, and maybe even learn a thing or two! What more could you ask for? Oh...pizza? Well...how about you order yourself some, ya fatty? SHEESH.

Episode 066: Huge Engagement

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 31 Dec 2010 12:00:00 -0400

It's the last show before 2011, and what a show it is! We've got a tale about a woman who got pregnant by a corpse, a discussion on gender segregation in schools, a quick look at Hugh Hefner's engagement, Marmaduke facts, a discussion on digging through your significant other's e-mails, and last but not least...A COOTIE CATCHER (Google it)! Welcome back to grade 5, boys and girls! HAPPY 2011!

Episode 065: Christmas at the Grinch's

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 24 Dec 2010 12:00:00 -0400

It's Christmas-time so you know what that means - we get to be a little bit lazy! Hear our excitement as we open up some presents that we received, and listen to various tales and news stories that'll make your nipples warm. HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

Episode 064: B for Breast Milk

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 17 Dec 2010 12:00:00 -0400

This week's episode starts off with a bit of sports discussion (the stadium that caved in, the Jets coach who ambushed a player, Mike Vick wants to get a dog, etc.), and ends with the boys taking a look at the school-board shooter in Florida, and the man who had his AIDS cured. Oh yeah, and then there's the middle, where Derrek and Luke drink breast milk. For real. Ick. This week's episode is loaded with calcium and Vitamin D, so drink up for some laughs and healthy bones & teeth!

Episode 063: Vaggitarius

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 10 Dec 2010 12:00:00 -0400

Fact: There are no other podcasts like Background Noise. For example, what other shows are visited by a mysterious prophet named Nostraderrek? What other shows teach you about the benefit of training your kid to use uzis? What other shows give you stories, and impressions, of mud monsters? What other shows have stunning duets of hit songs like "The Thong Song" & "Ignition"? EXACTLY. This show is a bizzare burrito smothered in a spicy, laugh sauce, and topped off with shredded news and chopped opinions. FEAST UP, FATTIES!

Episode 062: Super-vision

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 3 Dec 2010 12:00:00 -0400

HUBBA HUBBA! This show is so sexy that it's like...oh man, I can't even describe it fully so I'll just tell you about some of the discussions from this week's episode: racism in Hollywood, rape in South Africa, Wikileaks, snow days off from school, people and their lack of manners, and a slew of other saucy, spicy treats! Mmmmm....put us in you!

Episode 061: Brainstorm

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 25 Nov 2010 12:00:00 -0400

The show this week is full of fascinating facts, brainstorms & ideas that you definitely won't hear anywhere else! Wanna learn about a snow leopard's tail? Wanna know what a breast milk keg stand is? Interested to hear about a single news story that involves the stabbing of a lamb, an ear-slicing, a penis-hacking, and more on top of all that? If you answered no to all of these questions you're probably boring & uninteresting...if you answered yes to even just one of these questions, you are a curious child who is about to open up the cupboard of KNOWLEDGE AND JOY. Whatever you are, listen with your ears, and not your heart.

Episode 060: Cancer Quilts

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 19 Nov 2010 12:00:00 -0400

Radio personality Floyd, from Live 105's Morning Mob, is in studio to help the Background Noise crew out this week! Some topics of discussion are as follows: Mike Vick's dog-murdering past vs. his amazing football skills, Tony Parker & Eva Longoria's break-up, the royal wedding that no one cares about, and the "buy a truck, get an AK 47" deal in Florida. On top of all those delicious treats, during the last segment there is some hair removal via waxing happening! OUCH! This is the most painful episode yet...but not painful to listen to. WE PROMISE!

Episode 059: Pedophile Prowess

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 12 Nov 2010 12:00:00 -0400

On this week's episode we have a guest in studio, and that guest...IS A WOMAN! *gasp* That's right, filthyemails.org creator (among many other interesting things), Lee-Anne Poole is on the show to discuss her many, exciting ventures, phone sex, fetishes, the pedophile book on Amazon, smoking & then some! We also read some "filthy e-mails" on air, and the smooth talking, playalistic LeVon was instudio to help us out with that!

Episode 058: YUUUPPP!!!

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 5 Nov 2010 12:00:00 -0400

On this episode of Background Noise we share tales of lost loves, old relationships, being dumped, teen angst, "whore tricks", "duckers and balers", "the game" (that stuff between men and women, not the rapper), and a lot of other relationship-based talk! We also catch you up on our trip to Hal-Con (local science-fiction/fantasy convention) and talk about a couple who won $11 million and frankly, just didn't want it. YUUUUUP!

Episode 057: Say Allah to my Little Friend

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 29 Oct 2010 12:00:00 -0400

Oh man! Did you hear about that crocodile that caused the death of 19 people on an airplane? How about the puppy that was raped repeatedly by some sicko? No? Ever drink Four Loko? What's that? You don't know what that is? Well, you DID hear about that 20 year old Mexican police chief, right? What's that? Someone is trapped in a well, Lassie? It's Background Noise? WELL SHOOOOOT LET'S GO!

Episode 056: Wishing Death on a 10yr Old

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 22 Oct 2010 12:00:00 -0400

This week on Background Noise we have another guest, and that guest is...Mark Little from the comedy troupe Picnicface! He tells us about Picnicface's upcoming TV show on the Comedy Network, their movie Rollertown, upcoming local shows and MORE! Also discussed this episode is Simpsons porn (and cartoon porn in general), the pussification of sports, strippers & stripclubs, and what we think about modern music & today's songwriters! If this episode was food, it'd be filet mignon and you would be able to cut it with a spoon...just thought you should should know!

Episode 055: I'll Never Forget that Janitor

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 15 Oct 2010 12:00:00 -0400

What a wacky world we live in! Rapper T.I. has stopped a man from committing suicide, crotch-lifting underwear for men has been created, cars are driving themselves, women are being cruel to men, and Brett Favre is sending out pictures of his penis. These are just a few of the OUTRAGEOUS stories and discussions from this week's show. HOLY HANNAH! IT'S BACKGROUND NOISE FOR PETE'S SAKE!

Episode 054: Iron Man Rape Suit

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 8 Oct 2010 12:00:00 -0400

Would you rather fight a bear or a lion? Does an Iron Man rape suit exist? How do you cope with work-related stress? How do you fake cancer in order to swindle some money out of people? These are all important questions that need to be answered, and luckily, Background Noise exists to tackle such heavy issues. Put this in your ears and smoke it!

Episode 053 (fixed): a Big Fat Pimp gotta eat

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 1 Oct 2010 12:00:00 -0400

(note: episode 53 was accidentally a link to episode 52, but it is fixed now) Episode 53 - AKA Season 2 episode 1 - of Background Noise was a DAMN good one! Elmo came by the studio to tell us about a fight that he got into and Katy Perry's titties (we also found out that when he busts, yarn comes out), Hulk Hogan raped somebody, and we met a new character named Big Fat Pimp. News stories include: the legalization of prostitution in Canada, the Wiimote sextoy, a nasal spray that lowers your inhibitions, and M-M-M-MOOOOOORE!

Episode 052: 1 YEAR

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 24 Sept 2010 12:00:00 -0400

BOOM! POW! BOOM CRACKLE POP! FIREWORKS AND LIGHTNING BOLTS! Check out the 52nd episode of Background Noise to help celebrate it's 1 year anniversary! We've got balloons, streamers, champagne, gifts & prizes - literally! Listen up to find out who is cut and uncut (if you don't know what that means, then...well...you'll find out), to hear tales of our origins, to hear about a man who humped a dinosaur, parents kissing kids, girls kissing girls, a story about a man who hid stolen earrings up his butthole, and a very special rendition of the hit song, "Promiscuous Girl!" Here's to many more years, boys and girls! CHEERS! *clink clink!*

Episode 051: Tearing Up / Your Asshole

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 17 Sept 2010 12:00:00 -0400

Come on in and have a seat! Today we'll be discussing the times that we cried, buttholes, McDonald's characters, how to choose between kids in a life and death situation, the recent burka ban in France, how the news tries to censor truth and keep us all in line, the sexy tight ass girl that has been making headlines, and how to plan a clam bake. Okay, not that last part, but everything else. I promise.

Episode 050: Philip Graves vs. "The Mole"

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 10 Sept 2010 12:00:00 -0400

When a child gets herpes from eating a semen-filled condom in a hotel room, Background Noise is there to report! And yes, that's an actual story from this week's show. We also share with you 6 tips on how to become excellent at anything, and we keep you up to date with major news from all over the world! If you like laughing, learning, and being-in-the-know, then this is the show for you!

Episode 049: Kimber - Colony of Losers

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 3 Sept 2010 12:00:00 -0400

Tonight we have a guest on the show, Mr. Michael Gray Kimber. You MAY already know of his work at Colony of Losers: Michael Kimber's Success at Failure. Additionally we discuss the coming changes of the fall, moving away from your parents, and our weekly whirlwind of news stories for your pleasure.

Episode 048: Urine Luck

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 27 Aug 2010 12:00:00 -0400

Drugs can heal depression. Pee can be used to power submarines. There is a beagle named James Bond. Hitler is an African. Book reading makes you more smarter. Background Noise is tremendous. And such. End transmission.

Episode 047: Pair of Medics

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 20 Aug 2010 12:00:00 -0400

Lebron James is wearing incredibly tight pants, Lady Gaga is doing coke, cats are being marinated for dinner, girls are hitting puberty at age 7, and plants are growing inside of men's lungs...WHAT IS THE WORLD COMING TO?! I don't know, but one thing that I DO know is that this week's episode of Background Noise is chock full o' news & laughs to make even the most boring of days into a thrill-ride! Strap in, and hang on tight...this ain't no kiddie ride!

Episode 046: The Semen

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 13 Aug 2010 12:00:00 -0400

Stand back...there's a hurricane coming through! A hurricane of...INFORMATION AND LAUGHS, to be exact! On this week's show we explain to you why college is not always such a good thing, and discuss why TV shows so often have a fat, dumb, loserish husband with a smoking hot wife. We also tell the tale of a groom who sprayed his wedding crowd with machine gun fire by mistake...and the tale of a man who sprayed innocent women with bottles of semen on PURPOSE. Whoa. This show is intense, not to be confused with IN TENTS, because this is no camping trip, ya twerp.

Episode 045: Podcast of the Devil

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 06 Aug 2010 12:00:00 -0400

This week, on BACKGROUND NOISE: the guys discuss *large-breath* whether branding really makes a difference; some American folks hosting a Quran burning party; cringetastic injuries; monkeys in your pants; sexin' at the office; the danger of "romcoms," as Derrek calls them; and if you should allow your partner to sleep around!

Episode 044: Dey Rapin' Everybody

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 30 Jul 2010 12:00:00 -0400

Did you know that boobies can be ironed? Did you know that human minds can ACTUALLY meld together? Or how about this one: did you know that there is a parade of prostitutes in China? Well, I bet that you didn't know ANY of that! Man oh man...good thing Background Noise is here to keep you informed! PUT THIS IN YOUR EARS AND SMOKE IT!

Episode 043: Killer Beavers

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 23 Jul 2010 12:00:00 -0400

Beavers are attacking, there's a female on our show, and 2 Nigerians gave birth to a white baby with blonde hair and blue eyes. Is the world coming to an end? No, it's an ultra spectacular episode of Background Noise! We also talk about sluts - both male and female - and a lot of other wacky, fun stuff that you've come to love us for! Listen up...or down...or upside down. Whatever the devil it is you kids do these days!

Episode 042: Catapult of Honor

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 16 Jul 2010 12:00:00 -0400

Warning: poisonous weeds are taking over Canada! Also be on the look out for the raging Mel Gibson and super pedophile Roman Polanski! Oh, and if you're a goose, beware of the goose-o-caust. This episode of Background Noise is just FULL of danger! But unlike other danger, you really should take part in this. Just put on some oven mitts first, 'cuz this sonuvabitch is HOT!

Episode 041: Elvis Costello's Melba Toast

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 09 Jul 2010 12:00:00 -0400

This might be our silliest, funniest episode yet, so you're a complete twerp if you don't check it out! In this week's show we get a little carried away discussing Princess Di's hair jam, discuss how we would make love to different Star Trek aliens, smash on dumb kids giving away free lemonade, and for the first time in Background Noise history, we take some phone calls from our listeners! How exciting is THAT? The answer? At LEAST more exciting that when Kane was first introduced to wrestling. At LEAST.

Episode 040: Cows in Forests

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 02 Jul 2010 12:00:00 -0400

People are protesting in Toronto, sleeping with their own grandmothers, becoming dumber from the internet, and trying to kill themselves by jumping off of buildings that have now installed "suicide safety nets" to solve the problem. This is just SOME of the insanity discussed on this weeks show, but hopefully you're prepared for more because this whirlwind will SUCK...you in...to it.

Episode 039: Appealing Bones

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 25 Jun 2010 12:00:00 -0400

Devin returns, and with him he brings a tale of lightning and horror! Also discussed this week is airplane travel, Monopoly, vacation destinations, a millionaire chihuahua, Virtua Fighter, a virtual sperm bank, delirium, a bad mushroom trip, why people like horror movies, and a discussion of a website that is...well...it involves angry women and an orifice, so...tune in to find out what that's all about!

Episode 038: Hump, Don't Hunt

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 18 Jun 2010 12:00:00 -0400

Your ears are about to be popped right in the drums with another episode of Background Noise! Discussed this week is a man who claims a cow seduced him into sex, thoughts and opinions on animal rights/animal cruelty, why fat men get laid more than fat women, reality TV shows, E3 (video game showcase) and much, much more! If you like laughing, learning, and being entertained, then LISTEN UP... or down... either way, just LISTEN and spread the word! This show is growing like a very carefully cared for Chia Pet, and it's all thanks to YOU listeners!

Episode 037: Ving Rhames with a Poleaxe

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 11 Jun 2010 12:00:00 -0400

Devin, the brains behind this whole operation, is away doing manly man things.... But luckily, Jon has the skills and power to make sure that the show goes on! Conversation topics this week include Drake and Eminem's new albums, how WoW can save your life, whether or not it's cool to date/juice a friend's ex, Gary Coleman's scandalous ex-wife, and a list of execution styles, including an execution that involves you shitting all over yourself while being baked in the sun and eaten by insects. Seriously. They did that in some places. Get out your listening spoons and feed your ears some Background Noise!

Episode 036: Touchdowns!

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 04 Jun 2010 12:00:00 -0400

Oh no... Derrek is sick and not in studio... buuuuuut we have him on Skype and the show goes on! WHAT A TWIST! Let's talk about guilty pleasure songs and wild Asian ass... and maybe we could also discuss whether it's cool or not to hit the clubs when you're in a relationship? Yeah, I like that... and while we're at it, let's talk about denying people's friend requests on Facebook and a lot of other wacky things of interest! It's episode 36 and it's a Heinz of a pickle!

Episode 035: Jon Hippity Hops

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 28 May 2010 12:00:00 -0400

Imagine a world that has miracle berries that make everything you eat taste sweet; a world where incredibly white men read DMX lyrics; a world where laughter, insight, and advice are plentiful...now imagine not having to imagine this world because it actually exists and is called BACKGROUND NOISE! STEP INTO OUR WORLD AND DANCE WITH US, YOU MADMEN AND MADWOMEN! Episode 35 is fresh for your grill...I mean...your ears. Just download & listen, okay

Episode 034: Pedophile Island

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 21 May 2010 12:00:00 -0400

What a turbulent episode! Derrek gets pissed off, Devin & Jon debate as usual, and Luke James' voice sounds like a hoarse Fran Drescher...but that doesn't mean that Background Noise isn't in full effect! We discuss new sex offender laws, back-up plans, signs it's time to dump a friend, Life Aquatic, Human Centipede, Ciara's new music video, music in general, and other things that may or may not be of interest. Background Noise: PUT THIS IN YOUR EARS AND SMOKE IT!

Episode 033: Lamb Broth Baby Food

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 14 May 2010 12:00:00 -0400

Would you ever eat lamb broth baby food? Or how about escargot? Or maybe a nice serving of Klik (yeah...I know...wtf is that, right?)? Probably not, but we decided to give those, and some other gross foods, a try on this episode of Background Noise...so...the least you can do is appreciate our suffering! We also talk about the NBA and NHL playoffs, UFC, auctioned virgins, Dungeons & Dragons, AND MORE! Listen up to find out if anyone threw up...because of the food, not the show!

Episode 032: Gigolo Raid

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 7 May 2010 12:00:00 -0400

The thing about episode 32 is that it's spectacular. Why? Well, doesn't the idea of a gigolo raid sound interesting? Or what about health news about coffee, sex & laughter? Still not good enough? Well, how about we up the ante with a story about tiny mother? No? Well how about you shut-up, then.

Episode 031: Drink, kids, DRINK!

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 30 Apr 2010 12:00:00 -0400

Episode 31 tucks and rolls into your ears like a nimble gymnast - a nimble gymnast that wants to talk to you about first kisses, underage drinking, gay dogs, Archie's gay friend, $13 million thumbs, and probably cartwheels and somersaults, too! Sink into your favorite comfy chair, get your pipe, and ENJOY!

Episode 030: Sledgehammer Head Slammer

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 23 Apr 2010 12:00:00 -0400

BANZAI! It's the Super Mega Special 30th Episode Show! We have sledgehammer killings, bestiality farms, monkey police, and a whole treasure chest filled to the brim with other discussion topics to keep you interested, make you laugh, and give you something to talk about! If this show doesn't twist your nipples, then I don't know what does! KAPOOOOW!

Episode 029: RapeAxe

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 15 Apr 2010 12:00:00 -0400

The thing about Background Noise is that it's amazing. Why? Well, we discuss celibate celebrities, porn for blind people, Steven Seagal's sex slave, the weird habits of our listeners, the "rape axe", embarassing trends, and why nice guys don't always get a lot of women. That's not all that's in this barrel of fun though, so jump in like it's Donkey Kong Country and prepare to be blasted off!

Episode 028: Semen Walruses

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 09 Apr 2010 12:00:00 -0400

If you want your ears to get aroused, listen to episode 28 of Background Noise! We have a gay wrestler, aliens, a bunch of topless broads marching, a blind car driver, orgies, breastfeeding, a bunch of Turkeys, semen walruses, and then some! Okay...we don't "have" all of those things, but we DO discuss them. That's good enough, right?

Episode 027: Angry Angry Hippos

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 02 Apr 2010 12:00:00 -0400

Put your hands up on our hips, when we dip, you dip we dip....into another exciting installment of Background Noise! What other show gives you hippo facts, gives you tips on how to save $, has lots of immature d!ck jokes, and helps listeners out with their personal problems? None that I know of, and that's what makes us so damn special! Your ears will melt at the sultry sounds of our show! Enjoy, kiddos!

Episode 026: 10 Bus Commandments

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 25 Mar 2010 12:00:00 -0400

It's Dev's birthday week and our Half-A-Year celebration! We have a SUPER MEGA show! Open up your ears to hear about the "10 Bus Commandments", a personal story from Derrek, a tale of SORCERY!, the magic of mosquitoes, a giraffe in a dumpster, stories about teachers, drinking games, an interview with Down South Darryl, & then some! HAKUNA MATATAAAAAA!

Episode 025: Microwave Tanning

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 18 Mar 2010 12:00:00 -0400

Warning: this episode of Background Noise is hilarious AND informative! That's right, we make you laugh AND we teach you things! Tune in to hear about an old man who punches random children, how sitting down will kill you, the effects of tanning and cancer, Derrek crawling into a microwave, our listeners' prized stuffed animals, and then some! BIG BANG BABY IT'S LIKE CRASH CRASH CRAAAAAAAAASH!

Episode 024: Oscars

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 12 Mar 2010 12:00:00 -0400

Check out the freshest episode of Background Noise to get our take on the Oscars! Also discussed is a woman who has 4 titties, Lil Wayne in jail, the art of multi-tasking, the effects of small talk, superpowers, wilderness survival, and a gaggle of other fascinating topics...because that's what we do - FASCINATE!

Episode 023: Cuss-Free Week

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 5 Mar 2010 12:00:00 -0400

It's no cussing week this time around, and as a way of enforcing that rule, each of the Background Noise members was equipped with a foam plastic sword meant for whacking those guilty of uttering crass language! Who got the most whacks? Whose sword was it that broke? Whose ear got seriously jacked up? Listen up and find out!

Episode 022: Olympic Pole-Dancing

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 12:00:00 -0400

Have you ever thought about introducing the art of pole-dancing to the Olympics? Have you ever dumped someone over FB? Do you feel like you're getting old? Did you see Tiger Woods' apology? Or what about Gary Coleman EXPLODING in his latest interview? Well damn, whether you answer yes or no to these questions, listen to our show anyway because we've got you covered like a snuggie on a chilly Winter's eve! We also discuss the local cross-burning and share a lot of other ear candy, so LISTEN UP!

Episode 021: Moments of Terror

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 19 Feb 2010 12:00:00 -0400

Background Noise 21! Listen up to hear about moments of terror, thieving internet fans, walk-in clinics, gamer gangs, that Twilight guy's allergy to vaginas, Christians that say, "Shut-up, bitches!", and to hear the answer to one of life's difficult questions: should rape victims take the blame? You probably already know the answer to that question, but listen to us anyway just to be sure!

Episode 020: Valentines Day

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 11 Feb 2010 12:00:00 -0400

It's Valentine's Day...well, close to it...so here's our Valentine's Day special! Listen up for some tips and tricks on how to make sure that your Valentine's Day goes swimmingly - regardless of whether you have a significant other or not! There's also a discussion about John Mayer's recent N-bomb, the sharing of thoughts and memories about this lovey dovey time of the year, and a whole other bushel of hilarious and informative goodies for you to munch on! All we want is your LOVE...and your ears, so put some Background Noise in your pipe and blaze it up!

Episode 019: Groundhog Monks

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 02 Feb 2010 12:00:00 -0400

Groundhog's Day happened, Grammys were given out, and it's Black History Month! Based on that, how could this episode suck? Okay, don't answer that...but along with those happenings, we also discuss gay ass kids, sexual predators on X-Box, a sex robot, and then some!

Episode 018: All White Basketball

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 28 Jan 2010 12:00:00 -0400

Male prostitutes, Burger King bars & all-white basketball leagues! No, the world isn't coming to an end...it's just another episode of Background Noise full of whacky news, opinions, laughs, and maybe even a few insights (the keyword there being "few")! Listen to us while you do boring shit, because frankly, we make life exciting! Background Noise: PUT THIS IN YOUR EARS AND SMOKE IT!

Episode 017: Cats on a Bus

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 22 Jan 2010 12:00:00 -0400

Mystikal is out of jail, cats are riding on buses, people are smashing windows, old broads are getting stuck in elevators for days at a time, and frightening people are lurking in alleys! Background Noise covers all of this, and more, so kickback, relax, and PUT THIS IN YOUR EARS AND SMOKE IT!

Episode 016: Homeward Bound is Beautiful

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 15 Jan 2010 12:00:00 -0400

Come check out episode 16 of Background Noise, ya turkeys! We discuss people who are suicidal because of the movie Avatar, movies that made us cry, ways to break the ice with strangers, and that's not all! We also discuss steroids in sports & introduce our brand new segment, "Ride the Poll"! Who are the top dead celebrities that our creepy listeners want to have sex with? Well, listen up and find out! Put this in your ears and smoke it!

Episode 015: None!

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Thur, 07 Jan 2010 10:45:00 -0400

Holy guacamole! Background Noise still exists? I thought they all would've died by now! Well, since they're still alive and doing a show, let's take a look at some of the trinkets from the 15th episode

Episode 014: Smell our Pheromones

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Sat, 02 Jan 2010 12:00:00 -0400

HOLY MOLY! The first episode of 2010 is hot off of the presses and ready for human consumption, so open wide, sweetheart!

Episode 013: Peter, Paul and Mary Christmas

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Sun, 27 Dec 2009 12:00:00 -0400

Join us for some Christmas discussion

Episode 012: Baby Wigs

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 18 Dec 2009 12:00:00 -0400

Episode 12 has smashed through your window like a stray note attached to a brick! Check us out as we discuss the gay sex shenanigans happening atop one of Truro's backstreets, Dennis Rodman's latest 'bout of madness, a man who tried to get oral sex from a horse, the art of sexting, a 98 year old murderer, people mad over black nativity scenes, the effects of alcohol & various drugs, and much, much more! Geez Louise! Like the NWO, Background Noise is just too....sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet!

Episode 011: Penis on Fire

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 11 Dec 2009 12:00:00 -0400

The show that is changing the world, Background Noise, is crashing through your door and getting all up in your face like a God damn Silverback gorilla! Here are just a couple of key phrases to give you an idea about what episode 11 is all about: penises on fire, swine flu-resistant sex positions, dancing with Downs syndrome, role models, loneliness, porn virgins, "the talk", drunken madness & kung-fu wives. That's not all, of course, but if none of that gets your attention, you're probably an uptight dullard anyway. Bon Appetit, ears!

Episode 010: No More Lies

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 4 Dec 2009 12:00:00 -0400

Gadzooks! Episode 10 is here! Can you believe it? 10! Well, you should believe it because you've just been told! There are words coming out of mouths, and these words are hilarious and full of spizazz - which is spaz and pizazz put together, by the way! Listen up for talk about pump-it-up bras, a man who sleeps with his dead wife & a discussion about lies and speaking the truth! We've also got dating deal-breakers, lines from awful sex novels, co-ed students doing the nasty and more! Ooey gooey soft and chewy! LET US IN YOUR EARS!

Episode 009: Roaming Baboon Gangs

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 27 Nov 2009 12:00:00 -0400

Background Noise can't stop and won't stop! This week's episode is more exciting than a roller-coaster riding a roller-coaster! GAW DAAAAAAMN! We've got talk about a "knee-jerk reaction", the box office smash New Moon, the true evil of popcorn, fat people, roaming baboon gangs, sexual presidents, a man who pays kids to spit in his face, a 10 year old kid tasered, blind dating, the dating game & dating stories stories, FMP's album release & MORE! We even discuss the eternal question: would you put your life on the line to save a stranger? OH BOY! Strap yourselves in and prepare for a wild ride!

Episode 008: Gargantuan Ladies

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 20 Nov 2009 12:00:00 -0400

Prepare your ears for a hilarious assault because Background Noise is back at it like a jackhammerin' jackrabbit! Here are some of the things that you can look forward to hearing about in this exciting installment: Brock Lesnar's holey intestine, 7 things good parents do to screw up their kid's life, Faith healing doesn't work, Tall women, Pointy bras making a comeback, Disgusting pop flavors, texting behind the wheel, Youth violence & more! Laughs and opinions galore! WOWZERS!

Episode 007: Toxic Jizzum

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 12:00:00 -0400

Background Noise is back! Join us as we discuss the ridiculous things that celebrities spend money on, Coolio's upcoming MMA bout, the walking dead, a turtle god, Jesus found in a dog's asshole, giant sushi, a woman allergic to her husband's jizz, an enthralling discussion about happiness & much more! We've got a long episode for ya again, but hey, we only do this once a week so if you like laughing, learning, and being entertained I'm sure that you'll be able to find the time to listen! Put some Background Noise in your life, ya schlubs!

Episode 006: Space Hotel

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 6 Nov 2009 12:00:00 -0400

Background Noise is back with another spectacular episode chock full o' laughs and information! Check out some of these juicy headlines to get a jizt of what your ears will be subjected to this time around: Teletubby stick-up, Facebook banter, Space Hotel 2012, Ban on dirty dancing, Man sues over lack of "Axe Effect", Real life Dr.Frankenstein, Monstrous jellyfish, Girly men invading Japan & more!

Episode 005: Tonight we Dine on Baby Soup

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 30 Oct 2009 12:00:00 -0400

This week Background Noise brings you it's extended Halloween extravaganza. That's right, we went into some over-time for that ass! We've got animal attacks, Halloween memories, horror movies, treehouses, H1N1 talk, Q&A from the Red Matter forums, baby soup & more! Sink your fangs in, you spooky ghouls!

Episode 004: Punch Attack

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 12:00:00 -0400

Episode 4 is here and what a DOOZY it is! We've got all kinds of topics for ya this week: Ninjas, prostitutes, indestructible babies, Leona Lewis getting clobbered, the Balloon Boy, a dog thief & a whole lotta death! What more could ya ask for? A fake interview with a rap star? Oh, well guess what? We've got that for ya too! SURPRISE!

Episode 003: Shitty Dip

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 16 Oct 2009 12:00:00 -0400

Here are some of the stories discussed this time around: A cop beats down a special needs student, Theoren Fleury's dick was touched as a kid, Marge Simpson in Playboy, 2 halfwits jump into a tiger pit, a shit-covered man jumps into a pool, Mickey Rourke says "fag" and pisses people off, People on Facebook are idiots, Bas Rutten self-defense tricks & more!

Episode 002: The Sleep Watcher

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 09 Oct 2009 12:00:00 -0400

In episode 2, we talk about David Letterman's sex life, a hilarious local man who enjoys watching strangers sleep, South Park's new episode, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, a homeowner who was shot 6 times by police...while a home invader was in his kid's room, a crackhead who sings Amazing Grace at a funeral, and this amazing new trend in Japan called "Rent-A-Friend"

Episode 001: Noises of Steele

dev@redmattersite.com (Red Matter Media) — Fri, 02 Oct 2009 12:00:00 -0400

Check out the pilot episode of Red Matter's podcast, "Background Noise", with Devin Deuville, Luke James, Derrek Ord, Zaki Rafih & Jon Sangster! In this episode, the fellas discuss Roman Polanski's rape case, MacKenzie Phillips getting plowed by her own father, The Cleveland Show pilot, rapper DMX's upcoming MMA match, Louis CK's show in Halifax, wrestler Kurt Angle's recent woes, the noises pornstar Lexington Steele makes when he busts a nut, Captain Picard acting as a gay man, sneak peaks of some FMP tracks & more! WHAT A SHOW!