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How did this go all Potty?

2011-07-25T16:56:00.001+05:30

I fondly remember a day in a circulating library, where, for lack of any other interesting-looking books, I picked up a book titled ‘Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire’. At the time I didn’t even know that that was the 4^th book in the series, and that the 5^th book was on its way. I was skeptical, and it seemed a run-of-the-mill kids’ book with the underdog worsting the deadlier foe storyline. And, after like half an hour of trying to deduce who’s who and what’s what (Goblet of Fire, if you remember, is the book where Rowling stops giving elaborate ‘recaps’ and intros to the story), I knew this was a book I’d not drop until I finished it. After that I read the 3 earlier ones in a frenzied excitement and haphazard order (the order in which I read was – 4, 1, 3, 2!). From then on, it followed a similar pattern – save enough money to be able to buy a book, wait for the release, buy – and read like there was no tomorrow, and then, re-read it! I’m sure everyone has a similar story to tell about these books. Potter books have the pride of place on my bookshelf, and not because of a lack of worthier candidates for that place. There is something special about these books, that after everything is read and said, it still remains all the more special.

One great thing about fantasies is that you weave an elaborate yarn around yourself, and refine it as the author takes you along. They offer an escape from reality, so to speak. The first major difference about Harry Potter is that these stories are firmly rooted in reality. Yes, there still is an elaborate yarn, involving magic, incredible creatures, wands, and what not. But the groundwork is tightly in place in today’s world, filled with believable characters and incidents. That indeed, is the biggest strength of Potter books. When asked about why he can’t just use magic to erase all troubles, the Minister of Magic replies, ‘But the trouble is, the other side can do magic too’!!!

The next thing that strikes a reader is the amount of painstaking detailing that goes into developing each character and scene. As you go on, you realize each detail comes back to haunt you with its significance, sometimes 2-3 books later! The characters themselves evolve over the course of the books. Each of the protagonists discovers his/her strengths and finally makes peace with their weaknesses. While Harry’s metamorphosis catches your fancy easily, from a wide-eyed orphan kid to a short-tempered adolescent to a true hero, the other two go about it in an understated but equally touching way. Hermione, the most mature of all, comes to terms with herself fairly early in the novels, whereas Ron, always fated to be second to someone or the other, goes through the mill before he can discover what he truly is. The beauty of some characters, like Snape and Dumbledore, is that they unravel slowly, layer by layer. You think one as bad and the other as good, like a kid does when he is young, only to discover later that the world is full of black, white and a whole array of grays to choose from. This probably leads to many people feel that they ‘grow up’ with the characters themselves!

But the best thing about the books is that they are filled with sequences that you can ‘see’. The action set-pieces lend themselves easily to a movie that runs in your head: I could actually feel the rush of wind as Harry gets on a broom for the first time, or when he faces a dragon; I felt pure exhilaration when the Weasley twins soared away from Hogwarts after inflicting utter mayhem, or when Ron wins the Quidditch Cup (Remember ‘Weasley is our King’?); I almost felt my gut wrenched out when Harry first loses Sirius (his only closest parent-like figure), then Dumbledore (his hero since day one), then Dobby (one who was most loyal to him) and then Lupin (his only remaining connection to his father); I felt goose bumps all over reading the absolutely marvelous scene between Nagini, Voldemort and Neville. And this is my major grouse with the movies: how did they manage to make such epic scenes turn lame? But we’ll come to that in a bit.

My first thought when I started reading the books, was how close to ‘Lord of the Rings’ it was. Dumbledore looks, talks and behaves very conspicuously like Gandalf. The arch villain is called The Dark Lord, and is not named, and indeed, is not even seen, à la Sauron. Harry had too many traces of Frodo for my comfort, and Ron reeked of Sam. But somehow, as the story went on, I was able to ignore this. While the characters in LOTR were set in their behavior and experiences, the characters in Harry Potter evolved over time. While Tolkien’s Gandalf is all charm and wits and raw power, Rowling’s Dumbledore, that epitome of goodness, you realize, is a master in manipulation. They both have an aura of power about them, just beneath the surface, but Dumbledore is much, much more real than Gandalf. He gives up just about the required amount of information, is selfish at times, doesn’t trust his own judgment in crucial cases, is afraid of what power can do to him, and is even gay! Ahem. Just like Harry does by the end of the Battle of Hogwarts, we realize that Dumbledore’s greatness was not so much in his strengths, but in his acceptance of his own weaknesses. This is what true bravery is all about, and with a jolt we go back to those magical words: ‘It’s our choices that show us what we truly are, Harry, far more than our abilities’.

I had a lump in my throat when I turned the last page of Deathly Hallows. Not only because it was the end of something monumental, but also because of the name that Harry chooses for his son: Albus Severus Potter. ‘One of them was a Slytherin and he was probably the bravest man I ever knew.’ Beat that for epic!

With the kind of potential the source material offers, I imagined the movies to be good, if not awesome. Probably I was excepting a Peter Jackson at the helm. But sadly, I realized, LOTR was, is and will remain for some time to come, the best novel adaptation. Agreed, I did have very high expectations, and also agreed that one couldn’t possibly be completely faithful to the books as to include every page on screen. Even accounting for these two, the movies left me sad, and sometimes even frustrated. The movies over-dramatized some parts, left out crucial plot points (how many of those who only watched the movies, actually got to know what Patronuses are?), and simply couldn’t do justice to the action sequences or even Quidditch.

When I heard rave reviews about the final installment (yeah, heard, I made it appoint not to READ any reviews before watching), my hopes invariably inched upwards. I mean, Deathly Hallows is the book where everything seemed to happen. Harry’s dilemma about Horcruxes vs Hallows, Voldemort’s relentless hunt for Harry, the blockbuster Battle of Hogwarts with both the awe-inspiring battle sequences and several emotional sequences, had me on tenterhooks of anticipation. They couldn’t go wrong with all that, right? Oh, how wrong I was!

There are just two good things about the movie: 1. great special effects, 2. Good performances by the central trio and Alan Rickman, who plays Snape. On the other hand, I was left exasperated by whatever was going on. The movie just moves from scene to disjointed scene, where Harry and others just seem to find Horcruxes everywhere. Then why did they seem all lost in the previous movie? Go figure. Voldemort, who was less evil and more comical in all the previous movies, is just more so in this outing! He is relegated to the sidelines, like so many characters, including Bellatrix, who vies with Voldemort for the ‘most comical caricature’ award. McGonagall is reduced to a giggling girl with that horrible ‘I always wanted to use that spell’ bullshit, and what the hell was Molly Weasley doing, setting up the Hogwarts’ defenses? Did the best school of magic just run out of qualified Profs? Fred, Lupin and Tonks’ deaths, an emotional high-point in the book, is not even given its due respect. Crucial plot points were totally omitted. Nowhere did I come across the mention of the importance of objects that were Horcruxes. Nor are any pointers available about the Hallows, except for a passing reference. I mean, hello, the movie is called ‘Deathly Hallows’, for heaven’s sake!!! (In fact, the girl next to me ended up explaining about the 3 Hallows to her partner midway in the movie) Even the battle between Harry and Voldemort lacked the drama and the breathtaking effect created in the book.

And the story of omissions and misrepresentations doesn’t end there. Aberforth’s character just wheezes past, with Ariana there only in the portrait! How then, would you expect the far more nuanced history of Dumbledore (Grindelwald, who’s he?) getting to the Elder Wand, and Voldemort not being able to ‘master’ it? Another horror was the way the movie treats ‘The Prince’s Tale’. That was by far one of the best chapters in the book, as it firmly places Snape in the anti-hero’s role, giving his character the nuances that are not even given to Harry’s! But the movie made an absolute mockery of it in its snap-run-cut style. The Snape-Lily was brutally cut down, and who actually caught the reference to it in the Patronus??? Definitely not those who hadn’t read the books.

If I was expecting that to be the worst, I was mistaken. Now I understand adding over-dramatized scenes for added effect. I also understand tweaking sequences from the source material to heighten the drama from an understated but potential sequence. But 2 scenes from this movie left me flabbergasted and appalled respectively,

1. The scene where Harry just snaps the Elder Wand after the battle. Neat, except for one doubt: Pray tell me what he did for the rest of his wizarding life without a wand? While reading the book, I almost whooped with joy when Harry goes ‘Reparo’ to his Phoenix-tail wand. Here, I collected my horror-struck jaw off the floor and got ready to leave.

2. The Neville-Nagini fight. In the book, this sequence establishes that Voldemort can’t master the Elder Wand, even after killing Snape, for reasons which he wouldn’t know until later. Voldy tries to torture Neville, finds his spells don’t bind, while making Neville ‘worthy’ to draw out Gryffindor’s sword from the Sorting Hat. Neville, in turn, seizes the opportunity to make a clean job of Nagini. This scene gave me goosebumps. But in the movie, I had to try hard not to cry with exasperation as Nagini (for some lame reason unprotected), follows Ron and Hermione through Hogwarts, and Neville just jumps out with the sword and kills her at the opportune moment. Really, how could anyone rape this sequence?

Can someone tell me, why would anybody in their right minds actually under-dramatize sequences that were absolute wonders in the book? I mean, when a book has better detailing and action sequences than the movie, you have a serious problem.

Thanks WB for going so atrociously about one of the most ‘movie-ready’ books. I am thankful, really, that ‘It all ended’.

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Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides - Review

2011-05-23T16:47:00.004+05:30

Had decided that my next post shouldn’t be a movie review, which explains the hiatus (somewhat). But heck, after a couple of posts that I haven’t yet published, I am here again, with a ‘review’, cos I felt I had to do it!

There are movies, and there are more movies. The soul-stirring, inspiring, bedazzling ones. But ask me which are the best kind of movies, and I’d say the ‘Popcorn Movies’. (There, did I just a coin a term, huh, huh?) You know the type – leave your thinking hat outside, get the biggest bucket of popcorn available, sit back and give in! These are the kind of movies you can watch and watch again, even after the whole world’s dose of prim and proper and oh-you-are-wretched-if-you-haven’t-seen-this-yet movies. And on the very top of my list of Popcorn movies, is Pirates of the Caribbean. Wins hands down. No competition. Cannon fire!

Since the time that a certain “Captain” Jack Sparrow entered the frame swaggering on the ‘mast’ of an almost-sinking dinghy as if he owned the entire world and its neighbor, I understood what an actor can do to a character (a character, that was supposedly intended as a side-kick entertainer!). Along the way of the sequels, I heard tell that the second and third movies somehow lost it. ‘Convoluted’ is the word most people seem to use on almost all POTC reviews on IMDb. But somehow, strangely, I never felt so, and enjoyed each and every one of those capers, with their quirky one-liners, racy action sets, zesty music and fiery characters (especially Cutler Beckett, Joshamee Gibbs, Hector Barbossa, and of course, the indomitable Jack Sparrow – oops, *Captain* Jack Sparrow!)

In the latest outing, the powers-that-be have decided to trim the sails and ‘lose what can be lost’. In the way, of course, were Orlando Bloom and Kiera Knightley, and the running-amok screenplay. And am I glad that these are lost! So the attention is back where it should belong - on Sparrow. The movie is kept ‘steady as she goes’ simple. There is a spring whose waters give you eternal life – to be enjoyed pirating, and everyone wants a piece of the action for their own purpose. The Spanish (err…their motive was THAT, really!!?), the British, a bad guy – ‘The pirate all pirates fear’, and a ‘distressing damsel…oops, damsel in distress’! Strangely this time, Jack Sparrow doesn’t want any part in it, but is thrown in nonetheless. So they all race to reach there first, with allegiances changing faster than you can blink. And stranger still, Jack is the only one who doesn’t change allegiances – Jack loves himself, and his ‘Pearl’, and the seas. In that order. Period. That’s all there’s to the story. There’s an earnest attempt at character development, unlike in some parts in the earlier movies.

The good part – it works. The humor is both fresh and spoofy in a wink-wink sorta way. If you are a Pirates aficionado, you’ll get the cross-references, the way of talk and walk. If this is the first Pirates movie you cared to watch, you will still end up laughing anyways. That this movie has been designed as a good stand-alone, is one of the best things that happened to POTC franchise. There’s action – lots of it – and great visuals. For a change, there’s a female (who looks like a female, mind you) playing the foil to Depp’s Sparrow. The mermaids are an interesting addition, though I can’t figure why they were given so less screen time, given that the fight is one of the high points of the movie. The sword fights are good as ever, especially the one where Sparrow first meets Angelica, is totally reminiscent of the one in the first movie, where Sparrow meets Will Turner. Oh, and a word about the CGI and 3D. It is not overdone, and it all fits in neatly. This Pirates movie knows how to keep it simple and with the tide.

The bad – and there sadly is a lot – starts with overdoing the good ones. In an attempt to cut down the slack, the screenplay writers have pared it all down too much. What’s a Pirates movie without that pretentious over-the-top-ness? For me, a Pirates movie can be summed up thus – A long drawn-out action scene in the beginning à Jack Sparrow being Jack Sparrow, a totally evil bad guy à A jaw-dropping fight sequence near the end. This was the standard Gore Verbinski fare. With Rob Marshall, though he tries hard to keep things the same, the action has changed for the worse. Though at times Verbinski could be bizarre, he gave us some real gems. Cases in point – 1. Curse of The Black Pearl - Jack’s intro and ensuing madness all up to the glorious escape, and the epic Barbossa-Sparrow standoff in the end. 2. Dead Man’s Chest – The three-way sword fight. I am yet to see a scene which is madder, funnier and awesome-er, as far as sword fights go. 3. At the World’s End – you may not agree with me, but for me, this movie had its moments – the flag-unfurling sequence, the maelstrom Pearl-Dutchman battle, and the full canvas ‘fight’ between Pearl, Dutchman and Endeavour. Sadly, ‘On Stranger Tides’ has nothing that comes close. Similarly, the dialogues. Though the spunk still remains, it’s not as high on life as the earlier versions. At times, I really felt that Rob Marshall was not a great choice for this movie franchise. And, every Pirates movie has to have two fatal flaws – firstly, the unwanted angles – here, the ‘romance’ between the clergyman and the mermaid – what be the need??? And second, not putting the characters where they belong. If you have seen a Pirates movie before, you’ll vouch for the (non-gay) chemistry between Sparrow and Barbossa. They are the perfect opponents, and all shared screen times leading to rip-roaring laughter. I seriously expected a lot of it in this movie, but no. At least I hoped for some Gibbs-Sparrow sequences, but, no again! And the one supposedly-real ‘chemistry’ – the one between Sparrow and Angelica – is simply not given enough time! What was the goddamn point??? I mean, you have the best characters of the other movies, and you don’t get them to spend time with each other! And finally, the ‘Bad Guy’. Sorry, but I felt Ian McShane’s Blackbeard was a let-down. With the lot of Barbossa, Davy Jones and Beckett to keep up with, Blackbeard – a pirate supposedly everyone fears, simply doesn’t live up to the hype. Come to think of it, was ‘Curse of the Black Pearl’ the best movie so far, just because it had Barbossa as the baddie? That’s a thinker!

But with all the faults, ‘On Stranger Tides’ still manages to hold water. I’d give the credit almost completely to the actors. Keith Richards as Cap’n Teague is jolly, for the few seconds he’s there. Reprising his role as the affable Gibbs, Kevin McNally is impressive again, in his short(er) role. Ian McShane is good, in a role that should have been written better. Given the impressive line-up of baddies, it’s a surprise that his Blackbeard was not very memorable. Penelope Cruz, hidden away in bad lighting and long clothes, still manages to emote as much as she can. She brings in the much-needed female angle to the storyline. Geoffrey Rush is an absolute entertainer as a bleached and scrubbed Barbossa, now on the ‘other’ side – well, for a while. He still is the perfect foil to Sparrow, matching him one-liner to one-liner, one cunning move to the next. Pity this movie fails to dwell on this angle. And finally, of course, we come to Depp’s iconic Sparrow. Nothing more needs to be said than the fact that the entire franchise rests on Depp’s portrayal of Jack Sparrow. It’s no different here, as Depp seizes the role with both hands and does so flawlessly. It only helps matters that in this installment, there is no Turner-Swann shindig to take attention away from him. There are moments when you feel he doesn’t look as great as before, but that probably depends on the light! His charming gold-toothed smile, his enticing mannerisms and his witty lines make him an instant hit as ever. He has breathed life into this failing franchise, and manages to get it back on course, so to speak. It’ll be a sad day when he’d be too old to do what he does best. Simply inimitable!

*SPOILERS AHEAD*

There will come a day, when the Pirates will run aground, mostly due to their trying too hard. But this is not the day. The sun still is shining on this caper, with more fun to come. The prospect is mouth-watering, with Barbossa at the helm of Queen Anne’s Revenge, with a magic sword to boot. The movie is replete with sequel hooks, and, shiver me timbers, Jack almost has the Black Pearl back! With the wind on our side, we can all hope to see the ultimate showdown between these two. Having put Sparrow where he belongs, Disney will need to put the fight where it belongs, too! Weigh anchor, all hands!

PS: OH! In true Pirates fashion, there is an end-of-credits scene. Don’t you dare miss it. It made me leave a theatre with a smile…after a long time! Totally worth the wait, or so I felt! J
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Searching for a needle in a (biiiig) haystack!

2011-02-26T18:46:00.000+05:30

(Well, not exactly a needle, but its first cousin. And the haystack is called Mumbai these days.)

Recently, I took a rare pilgrimage to that crowd-infested, festering, claustrophobia-inducing, bewildering city which also serves as the only 'as-close-to-metropolitan-as-possible' city of India. Mum-bhai. It was 'My Best Friend's Wedding' (I totally intend the pun!), and I had to make the said guy feel miserable looking at what he lost out on. Hahahaaaa. Me man-eater me!

So, as any other girl going to a friend's wedding, I too was seized with the inexplicable tug at the heart. That I should not let the wedding happen? No! That I should wear a saree on the said day. Ah! So, having recently bought a new saree and decreed that it will be 'The Chosen One', the actual preparations started. This is a part of the beauty of our national attire. After first going through the motions of shopping for, painstakingly selecting, visualising, and buying a saree, you just don't don it. No Sir. You are just beginning the ride. First off, the 'blouse piece' has to be lovingly detached by a Ceasarian section from the main material of the saree. Next, additional threads and pieces of cloth are sutured on to the remaining material, in the name of 'Falls' and 'Zigzag' (you may have heard other names like Peco, but I assure you they all pale in comparison to the zany name Zigzag). Also, the detached piece is separately nurtured in a personally favoured greenhouse called 'Ladees Tilors', into a fully-grown blouse, which can cover and un-cover as much as the wearer wants. And also, there is this strange skirt-like thing (which can be an outfit in itself considering the amount of cloth in it), called Petticoat, but is neither petty nor can be called a coat! All these things have to exactly match each other and the saree itself. A slight variation in colour, tinge, or material, and you will be a study in fashion disaster. And the people who judge you will not be the aesthetic fashion police, but your friendly neighborhood aunties/friends/sundry female passers-by. (Males won't care either way!)

Oh! and if you are thinking finally you will be wearing that saree after all this effort, wait! Before that blissful moment, you ought to accessorize the saree in the most ethnic-looking, huge, gaudy baubles - bangles, sets of ornate earrings and necklace, bindis, anklets, heels, etc, etc. That done, you will run around to all the sundry places that all the sundry pieces of your saree reside in. The blouse gets delayed. The falls is on the wrong end. Or you just don't think the colour matches. Or whatever. Once all the heavens conspire that you can finally go ahead with the above processes, the actual wearing of a saree can begin.

Considering that most of the above processes involve a good mixture of shopping, arguing, bargaining, dilly-dallying, repeated enquiring, running around shops, etc, it can be totally deduced that the representatives of the male species have as much stomach for this as Rakhi Sawant has for clothes. No wonder then that sarees were considered a contributing factor in many of the husband-suicides, up until the last decade, especially in the Southern parts of India (where sarees were predominant). Unsubstantiated rumors also link the saree as a reason for Vidya Balan not having found herself a boyfriend yet.

Also, few words about the 'Saree-draping' process itself. It involves careful draping and re-draping around yourself, of a cloth about 6 meters in length. While the saree is credited as being the most versatile of all dresses (you can really choose if you want to look a sexy siren or the 'lakshana'-fied demure lady), simple-to-wear it definitely isn't. The drape can make you look fatter, thinner, or whatever you don't want to be. And there are those quirky things called 'PLEATS'. They take utter dexterity of fingers and a lot of careful practice to get right. So, most of the times, they are done with the help of mothers, sisters, room-mates, friends, or even a lost, thoroughly depressed (and mostly hopelessly-horny) husband! Spare a thought for the latter please!

If you are wondering where all this talk is leading to, well, you're right. Mumbai. Having packed at the last possible moment - meaning when the cabbie was honking near my gate - I ought to have forgotten something or the other. Checking on all those above-listed trappings of the saree, I discovered to my horror in Mumbai that I had forgotten one most important thing. A 'Safety Pin'!!! Now, if you know anything about wearing a saree, you will know what absolutely crucial role this little bugger plays in this long-drawn saga. When I called Mom in a totally freaked-out state, she assured me patiently that I would definitely be able to find it near wherever I was put up. After all, Mumbai was such a huge city, and what is a simple safety pin if you can't find one!? So began my journey for the search of a bunch of safety-pins (Who gave them that name, anyway!?).

I was staying in a commercial neighborhood, which held a lot of promise for my quest. So I walked down on a fine morning to explore the shops lining the streets. The shops in the area were the usual line-up of Ambe Hardwares, Digi-tech Computers and Accessories, Sri Sai Printers and Printing Solutions (for some reasons, printers-and-cartridge sellers were huge in number in the area). Dejected, I turned to the make-shift shops on what used to be the footpath. These kinf of shops, as you know, bring the whole world on a length of tarpaulin cloth. From belts and goggles to earbuds, you name it. But, 'Sorry ma'am, no safety-pins'. So I walked in desolation. And I walked. Until I had to cross a waymeet of 4 main roads. Lovingly called 'Signal' or 'Circle' here, or 'Naaka' in the North, or 'Chaar-Raasta' in the West, and 'Junction' in Mumbai. I have heard many friends talk about how difficult it is to cross Mumbai streets. I find it rather easy. All it takes, is to close your eyes tight, and walk across. And pray you do reach where you started out for. Fairly simple methinks.

So after crossing this 'Junction', I held on to my course, lest I be lost. I normally have an absolutely spiffing sense of direction, but Mumbai cows me down somehow. I feel like a complete misfit, with my gaping mouth and wide-open eyes taking it all in. So, I didn't want to take chances and stuck to a small circumference of exploration. No luck. Then, I came across a small lane, leading off to God knows where. This lane was full of small shops, vegetable-shacks, etc. In all sense of hopefulness, I stepped in. And from the first step, I knew I would be an even greater misfit on this lane, with everyone serenely walking around in head-covering sarees or worn-out dhotis. As uncomfortable as I could get, I searched the street, as far as I could go, for any sign of the usually ubiquitous 'Fancy Stores'. In a city like Bangalore, you'd have found atleast 4-5 of these in a lane like the one I was walking on. But here, it eluded me. Finally, I resorted to asking in a couple of General Stores. Few of them shooed me away, a couple gave me looks which conveyed clearly what they thought about my mental health. Finally one shopkeeper gave the right signs. Hesitated for a few minutes, tried hard to recollect what it looked like, and then after few more minutes of searching while a held my breath, roughly shoved a bunch of those shiny little pins. Feeling utterly blessed, I thanked him and returned, completely drenched with sweat, towards my hotel. A search that I hoped would take me a few minutes, had cost me 2 hours, a few calories burned in walking, and Rs. 3 for the metallic, prickly things.

Almost when I was about to reach the hotel, a man started following me. No, he was just another hawker. He said he had all sorts of key-chains. I said I wasn't interested in buying any. He persisted, saying he has really good ones. When I clarified that I had nothing to lock away, he asked whether I'd be interested in looking at Combs, hair-clips, and such. After my refusal again, he walked swiftly and blocked my way right near the hotel gate, holding all the above-mentioned girly stuff under my nose. With a sense of foreboding I looked down. In his hand, neatly snuggling amongst a jumble of clips, bindi-packs and small combs, there it was: a nice, fine bunch of --- 'Safety Pins'!

Digital Fasts!

2010-11-02T16:05:00.005+05:30

When was the last time you sent a card to your friend on their birthday? Or sat down to actually write a letter? If you belong to today’s vast majority, you take the easy way out - When you can wish them on a birthday with a visit, you prefer to send a card. When you can send a card, you call. When you can call, you’d rather SMS. When you can SMS, you’d rather ping. When you can ping, you’d prefer to put it up on their Facebook Wall. Next is What???

Of late, we hear a lot about ‘digital fasts’ and their positive effects on relationships. Digital fasts involve unplugging from technology, not going online, switching off your cellphones, etc. But aren’t fasts taken up supposedly to ‘cleanse’ yourself? On this vein, I read this very interesting post on HBR (link) which asked the same question as I had: Is it so bad or ‘dirty’ to lead a ‘virtual’ life, that we need to ‘unplug’ to feel fresh and foster a ‘normal’ relationship? While the author raises some very pertinent questions, I feel she is bang-on about the feeling behind the divide. Real world relationships are still considered sacrosanct while inherently we mistrust virtual relationships. But this apart, isn’t the premise of the entire social networking, online persona-building etc supposed to foster ‘keeping in touch’? Hasn’t online existence actually helped us to keep up with our friends/ colleagues/ relatives who otherwise are way out of reach?

The problem, I feel, doesn’t lie in the utility of the web or other means of virtual existence, but actually in our inability to put a ceiling on ourselves. When online, we don’t limit ourselves to what we intended to see. We spread out. We want to check on what our friends are doing, and we end up checking what their friends, and their friends in turn, are doing. And one of them shares an interesting link and we want to check that link, we like that link and say so, and pat! We made a new friend! That’s good, but where would you stop? Look at your Facebook or Orkut friends list. How many of those hundreds do you actually think you can stay in touch with? Or rather, how many would you LIKE to be in touch with, and how many did you just add up, just cos they were on your friends’ list? I have friends who take a look at their friends list and wonder who some of those are, and how come they are there!!! Really, do we need to follow some celebrity on Twitter? So what if they did get stuck in a toilet or got hit by their wife? What does it mean to you when someone says ‘I want to visit my friends’? More or less, they actually mean they want to visit their friends’ twitter or Facebook pages. The problem is that in this mad rush, we do take the easy way out. And at the end of the day, even people in the same house are online, ‘liking’ and ‘commenting’ on each other’s updates, while they can just walk up to each other and talk all they want. And to add to that, they can know what exactly the other person feels, not disguised behind the smileys and repeated editing.

Personally, I don’t understand when people say they feel relaxed and rejuvenated without the ‘obligation’ of being online, when they go away for a few days or something similar. Did someone force them to be online in the first place? Whose mistake is it if we can’t draw a line for ourselves? I have seen friends who would feel an almost physical trauma if they can’t check their mails or login to their social networks, or even misplace their cell phones for a moment.

The worst case I’ve come across in the real vs. virtual world debate is this. I know a girl and guy duo, who were thinking of soon becoming a couple. The girl, a friend, led what one can call a ‘healthy’ online life, that is, being online at work, staying active once in a while on a social networking site, etc. This in itself led the guy to think the girl was a sort of attention-mongering female! (I’m talking about a guy who’s from a metro, himself active virtually) My friend thought this was a bit rich, as virtual devices were the ones that led them into their relationship, and helped them keep in touch day-to-day. Not only that, the guy used to ‘keep an eye’ on his ex-girlfriends online too! I mean, you don’t have the gall to talk to them directly, but would know what they are doing, through the backdoors! If that doesn’t reek of hypocrisy, then I wonder what does. I guess there is no need to say that they didn’t end up becoming a couple… Thankfully, my friend didn’t go on a ‘digital fast’!

Leading a robust online life need not necessarily riddle you with guilt. But you only need to draw your lines. Too much of avoiding being virtual can lead you into being cooped-up and rob you of valuable information, and too much of online wandering can live you clueless in non-virtual pursuits. Do tease your friends about their new profile pic on Facebook, but make sure you are going out and snapping a few pics of your own too! Do use emails, pokes, status updates all you wish, but do write a letter to someone dear, just to make their day. Do use online calendars to remind you of your friends’ birthdays, but take the effort to walk across and wish them. The smile on their face would be worth more than any number of smileys. But whatever you do, make sure you don’t feel any guilt for it, at the end of the day. After all, if it helps you keep in touch with many more people than otherwise, being online cannot be all bad, right?

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Enthiran ... An awe-inspiring visio!

2010-10-10T23:30:00.002+05:30

Some friends, who read my blogs but are silent about it (only to tell me their opinions personally/ by chat later), were wondering why I hadn’t yet written about Enthiran. I told a couple of them that I liked the movie too much to put the experience into words. But the real reason was something else. Though I do watch selected Tamil movies, I always prefer watching Tamil movies in isolation. Simply because my routine while watching goes like this: Play the movie on my Vaio – rewind at a particularly difficult scene/ dialogue – listen carefully and make own assumptions – repeat if required. One small illustration about my Tamil skills: Couple of months ago, when first I heard about the title of the next Rajni movie, ‘Enthiran – The Robot’, I thought it referred to the God Indra! When I ran this theory across a Telugu friend who hadn’t seen the poster or trailer yet, he commented that it actually might be ‘En Dheeran’ (My hero)!!! Finally, a couple of sympathetic colleagues explained it actually is for ‘Yantra’ (machine) which literally makes it ‘the machine-man’ or Robot. Phew!!!

So when faced with the decision to whether watch Enthiran, I decided I’d wait till the DVD releases. A friend at work convinced me that that would be a gross injustice to myself, and that this spectacle merited a viewing at the screens. But the language factor was still an issue, with me thinking that I’d probably watch it in Telugu or even Hindi. Thanks to the Karnataka Film Chamber’s intervention, I was spared from the mishap that could have happened. I mean, in what other language would you enjoy ‘Icekke ice vaikkade’ or ‘Robo vai po po ennaade..!’ J

Okay, too much of an intro. On to the movie. A fairly straight-forward story, of a scientist’s pet creation gone wrong. Right from the beginning of the movie you know what to expect – you are told that the robot has the power of a hundred men (Err… Didn’t Rajni have that in all his earlier movies too!?), understands all languages, has oodles of other super-powers, which scream ‘will be misused shortly’! So well, like in Spiderman movie where we had a good Spidey and a bad, black Spidey, so here. Only, it’s an Indian movie, so the driving factor has to be love. So in comes the very ‘Icy’ Aishwarya, who looks ably curved-up and gorgeous, who makes a robot to dream of lovey-dovey molecules (Kaadal Anukkal)!!! Ahem.

Soon, jealousy ensues, rejection happens, the baddy takes over, the robot is re-born as the devil himself, thanks to the villain, Danny Denzongpa’s ministrations. Found it really amusing that the new program is simply called the ‘Red Chip’! LOL!!! If that’s not playing to the gallery, then I wonder what is. Shankar can really give other directors a lesson on how to make the masses ‘follow’ a sci-fi story. From then on, till the end, it’s a mind-blowing action ensemble which leaves you gaping at the edge of your seat. At first, you are happy that you see Rajni in a double role, as the scientist and his cute creation. Then, it takes on ‘Matrix’-esque proportions of multiplying Rajnikanths. What an idea Sirji!!! I had to retrieve my jaw from below the seat at the end of it all! (No, really, I realized at a point, I was actually watching the movie mouth agape, since I dunno when!)

If you are a Rajnikanth fan, I’m sure you’re bound to be disappointed at least a little in the first half. No punch-lines, no cigarette/beedi/chewing-gum popping, no goggle-swirling (though there is this wink-wink moment when the scientist Rajni puts goggles onto the robot. The audience hoots. Bliss!), no amazing entry (this took me by surprise!), and not even the customary ‘Praise-the-hero’ song. And that’s where Shankar scores. By damping-down the Rajni persona, he pushes it all to the racy climax, and you can’t complain for a moment. I mean, if watching a hundred Rajnis at the price of one, walling up, spiraling down the streets, gobbling up city squares and vehicles alike, isn’t ‘Paisa Vasool’ for you, then you’re at the wrong part of the planet. No diwali for you, folks!

Technically, the movie is impeccable. Helmed by the best technicians around the world, you can’t find any holes in the rendering of the movie. Only complaint that one can have is about the singularly uninspiring music score by Rahman. Though, as is Rahman’s wont, the songs may sound better after repeated hearings! Also, the songs, though well-shot, are misplaced mostly (especially the Arima Arima song, just before the climax). The last half an hour, even the final words - 'Naan sinthikka aarambhichitten' - Pure bliss! Hollywood, here Shankar comes!!!

Performance-wise, Ash is expected to look great, and manages it with aplomb. Danny holds himself ably in front of the gale-force of Rajni, and that’s saying something. But of course, Enthiran is about Rajni. He shows you, yet again, why no other actor in India, and possibly the world over, can carry the role as he has done. There are times when you watch an actor and are able to see through his persona, more than the role he is playing. Rajni goes a step ahead. The whole movie, in every scene, Rajni’s persona shines through like a searing light, awing you. Be it the mechanical body language of the robot, the dapper scientist or the wicked laugh of the bad robot, Rajni makes you catch your breath. The sheer energy of this man and his dedication to his craft are beyond praise. It doesn’t hurt that at his age he is fighting fit too! A movie like Enthiran can sap the energy out of any actor, and to carry it off at 60+ is sheer passion. It is Rajni who makes Enthiran what it is turning out to be : an out-and-out grosser!

Do yourself a favour: Watch Enthiran. Then, watch it again. For an ageless man.

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Bollywood is back... with a (Da)bangg!!

2010-09-17T14:25:00.001+05:30

Remember the good old Hindi movies? The movies which didn’t need your brains to be present, ones where the heroine just came on for a couple of songs and lovey-dovey sequences, and the hero ran the show, literally? He was the super-man, super-lover, super-son, super-whathaveyou. But then Bollywood grew up, and started taking itself seriously. A bit too seriously at times. The multiplex-goers wouldn't 'maaro seeti' for all those mass movies, we were told. People who follow Southern movies didn't miss the old masala capers, cos our Telugu and Tamil movies have kept up the baton. Well, as the title of the post says, that erstwhile Bollywood is back. And this time, unlike some feeble previous attempts, we can say ‘Well met, dear friend, we missed you.’ With Dabangg, we finally have a movie which succeeded in reviving that feeling of watching movies for the heck of it. And it does so almost effortlessly, in a way that even the most jaded multiplex-goer will either end up maaro-ing seeti, or smirking at the number of seetis.

Dabangg is an unabashed rehash of ‘Wanted’ in many respects. ‘Pokiri’ in Telugu was a slick action movie, with great songs and a young hero who suited the role to the hilt. Wanted had to make some huge adjustments to make it credible as a Salman movie. What Abhinav Kashyap has done is to turn the entire chimichanga the other way round. He has effectively started from Salman, what he’s known for, what suits him best, and then woven a story around it. And Dabangg has all that. It brings back the sautela-bhai angle, it brings back the village belle (the shy and non-seductress types), the infamous Thakurs or other patriarchs in the form of a baddy politician, and most of all, it brings back the corny, invincible hero. But don’t let the rustic feel of Dabangg fool you. For all its brazen earthiness, Dabangg is an intelligently made movie, which achieves what it aims to. It plays to the gallery, and is really unapologetic about it. Story-wise, there is nothing new to offer. There is a bad guy who forces an estranged family to pull together and fight for its own survival. Simple, and straightforward. What is fresh here is Salman’s role of a good-hearted cop who is corrupt to the core.

When we walked into the cinema hall a couple of minutes late, the screen read ‘Fights: Vijayan’. I knew then and there what the movie will be about: elaborately choreographed fight sequences, which have some Pierce Brosnan-or Rajnikanth-like interludes. Within the first few minutes, my friend whispered: ‘The action HAS to be by a Tamil guy’. Bingo! :-) (Not only Tamil guy, it was the same Tamil guy who did Wanted!) So, we have the baddies flying around in slow motion like no tomorrow. And then we have the baddy-supremo, Sonu Sood, and you love to hate him from the moment he steps on screen. Ever since I saw Arundhati (telugu), I’ve felt this is one actor who can do far better if given the right roles. Here, he is in his element, and what’s more, even his name (Chhedi Singh) is fraught with purpose. Watch the movie to see what I mean. Then we come to the belles. I was pleasantly surprised with Sonakshi Sinha who exudes old-world charm with her every move. And when she says, ‘Thappad se darr nahi lagta hai sahab, pyaar se darr lagta hai’, you know she’s won your heart. Dabangg is mostly about such lines, unpretentious, at times cheesy, but lovable all the more.

Performance-wise, Arbaaz is wooden. Anupam Kher, Vinod Khanna and Mahesh are under-utilized. Sonakshi makes a smashing impact, though in a limited role. Sonu Sood is oh-so-perfect in his small-time politician avatar. But of course, it is a Salman show all the way. You fall in love with him the moment he lands into that garage (a-la Pokiri, I mean, Wanted), and stay dumbstruck all through, till the last, shirt-ripping scene. He holds one under his sway, be it when he is wooing the stony lass, or bashing up a dozen goons, only to pocket the loot at the end of the day. He pouts, he breaks into impromptu dances in the midst of a fight, he consoles an injured sub-ordinate by saying he’ll get a ‘pichkari’ fixed to his toilet(!), he even hangs up his goggles on the back of his collar, so as to 'see what goes on behind his back'. But he’ll do all that with such panache that you’ll end up smirking and gobbling it all up. I wonder if anyone else, anyone, in Bollywood can do the role of Chulbul ‘Robinhood’ Pandey like Salman and hold the masses the way he does in Dabangg. How many of those 'stars' can mouth, 'Motewale us taraf jao, patlewale is taraf jao, aur fit wale mere peeche aao.... Kya ho gaya police force ko!' and get a whole-hearted laugh out of you? Yeah well, I’ve fallen head over heels for Salman Khan after watching this movie, and I’ve no qualms admitting to it!

Technically, the movie is really, really witty. The mantra here is ‘underplay’, and the director has achieved it superbly. The music score is great, especially the title track and ‘Tere mast mast do nain’, for the singing and music department. But the title track and ‘Munni badnaam hui’ are choreographed and penned in an amazing way. Especially loved the belt swinging step in Udd Udd Dabangg. Hilarious! Infact, if you want to see the effect Salman has on this movie, watch ‘Munni..’ The song, which initially sears up the screen, takes on dizzying heights once Salman enters the frame. Finally, it is Abhinav Sinha who has to take the credit for making Dabangg work. He has showed that with the proper presentation, old wine can be a great refresher in any bottle. What works for Dabangg is its fresh and corny dialogues. Its rustic feel. And of course, Salman. But above all, what works for Dabangg is that it doesn’t take itself seriously. Get out those over-sized goggles, and get ready to whistle and hoot your way through Dabangg!

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Does this world really matter?

2010-08-18T18:37:00.001+05:30

Was feeling bluesy, and haunted by all sad feelings. Remembered a song about the futility of this world and everything in it. The song is from the movie 'Pyaasa' by Guru Dutt, and you have to watch the movie to get a crash-course on how movies should be. I consider myself too, too small to even comment on this movie. The movie had breathtaking acting by Waheeda Rehman, Johnny Walker, Guru Dutt himself... But above everything, even above the famous camera angles, were the songs. Written by the ultra-painful pen of Sahir Ludhianvi, this movie boasts of gems like 'Sar jo tera chakraaye..', 'Hum aapki aankhon mein', 'Jaane kya tune kahi', and of course the amazing 'Jaane woh kaise log the jinke pyaar ko pyaar mila...' But standing apart from the rest of the awe-inspiring songs, atleast for me, is this song. Rendered soulfully by Rafi (did that guy ever sing without soul!?), this song touches one's heart and wrenches the strings out. Maybe it is a bit too heavy on emotions, but come back and read it when you are blue. You'll know what I mean.

(I even tried to do a translation, though I can nowhere match up to the feelings that come out in the original. Don't ask me why I did it.)

Yeh mahlon,yeh takhton,yeh taajon ki duniya,
yeh insaan ke dushman samaajon ki duniya,
yeh daulat ke bhooke riwaajon ki duniya,
yeh duniya agar mil bhi jaye, to kya hai?

Har ek jism ghayal, har ek rooh pyaasi,
nigahon mein uljhan, dilon mein udaasi,
yeh duniya hai ya aalam-e-badhawaasi,
yeh duniya agar mil bhi jaye, to kya hai?

Yahaan ek khilona hai insaan ki hasti,
yeh basti hai murda paraston ki basti,
yahaan to jeevan se hai maut sasti,
yeh duniya agar mil bhi jaye, to kya hai?

Jawaani bhatakti hai badkaar ban kar,
jawaan jism sajte hain bazaar ban kar,
yahaan pyaar hota hai vyapar ban kar,
yeh duniya agar mil bhi jaye, to kya hai?

Yeh duniya jahaan aadmi kuch nahi hai,
wafa kuch nahi, dosti kuch nahi hai,
yahaan pyaar ki qadr hi kuch nahi hai,
yeh duniya agar mil bhi jaye, to kya hai?

Jala do ise,phoonk dalo yeh duniya,
Mere saamne se hata lo yeh duniya,
tumhari hai tum hi sambhalo yeh duniya,
yeh duniya agar mil bhi jaye, to kya hai???

(My translation; don't hit me with anything hard please!)

This world, of palaces, thrones and royalties,

This world of societies that are enemies to humanity,

This world of customs that demand only wealth,