Rad Thad's Blog of Random Fuckery

Rising from the Motherfucking Ashes like a Jesus-Phoenix

2011-05-26T20:25:00.000-07:00

Hey guys, I figure that a few of you probably don't really bother to check on me anymore since I haven't posted anything in a long-ass time. Seriously, there's so much shit that happened between my last post and now that would've been gold for me to write about but it was just hard for me to find the time. It was partly because of my attempt to balance college and my job, but laziness probably worked its way in there way more than just one time. Anyway, I'm just posting this because my college year is almost up and I should have a lot more time on my hands, part of which I can sacrifice to this blog. So, expect something from me in another week or two.

This image came up when I did a google image search of Jesus-Phoenix
I'm sure there's a metaphor in there somewhere

Zombie Rad Thad Out!

Matters Concerning the Future of Humanity as it Relates to Artificial Intelligence

2011-02-15T18:50:00.000-08:00

I don't know if any of you fuckers out there watch Jeopardy, but I do, and I love it intensely. I'm real fucking pro when it comes to obscure trivia and I've found that most of the time I'm able to outperform the contestants on the show....until now.

IBM has created a computer that can compete in Jeopardy and they've named it ~~SkyNet~~ Watson.

Watson's logo, obviously pinpointing potential threats to the Machines

This is seriously fucking scary. Not only has a super-intelligent AI been created but it's been able to do what no mortal has been able to do before: best me at Jeopardy. It's only a matter of time before Watson becomes bored with it's current opponents, Brad and Ken, and come searching for a more formidable opponent. Namely: me.

I'm assuming one of these is going to show up at my house and challenge me to 20 Questions

What if I'm the last hope for humanity, the John Connor of prime-time game shows. I'll need to start preparing my mind if I want to compete with the cold, emotionless, calculating super-computer that would like nothing more than to humiliate me in front of the entire nation, sending a clear message that machines now controlled the world of game shows and any attempt to dethrone them would be met with unmerciful force.

But fear not, my comrades. You can rest assured that I will not go down without a fight. And when I finally crush Watson's silently whirring CPU beneath my boot, you can be sure that I will deal with that traitor, Alex Trebek, who attempted to pave the way for AI dominance.

I've got your number, Trebek
And your mother's as well

Also, I'd like to say that there's going to be a slight change to my updating schedule. When I started this blog I wanted to try and be able to post daily. I quickly realized this was a terrible mistake because even though I'm quite awesome, I simply can't distribute it every single day. So from now on I will be making at least one totally fucking awesome post a week, though I will update more frequently than that if I find more things to talk about that week.

Rad Thad out, you robot-fighting people

Tattoos

2011-02-08T13:52:00.000-08:00

I'm one of those guys whose really into the idea of "fuck societal norms", and no, this does not mean that I'm one of those retards that would consider breathing too mainstream if it weren't for the fact that it was essential for continued life.

This guy is so non-conformist that he dresses just like a million other people
I fucking hate hipsters

In truth, there's a lot of things I do that may not exactly be seen as part of the mainstream such as growing facial hair, listening to thrash metal (FUCKING SLAYER), and eating food that nobody else seems to like (see previous post). The thing is, however, I don't do these things so I feel like a unique little snowflake, I do them because I really fucking love those things, and I'm soon going to be adding "getting tattoos" to that list.

Now, I know that a lot of people already have tattoos and that it's not really all that unique, and I'm cool with that. You want to know why?

I just don't give a fuck

I've wanted to get a tattoo since I was 14 and I've had to constantly listen to argument after argument about why I shouldn't get one, and I didn't listen to a single one of them and I'm going to be getting my first tattoos this summer. I'm pretty fucking excited about all of this because I have a friend doing the design, which is going to be woodcuts of two ravens (one standing still and the other taking off) and they're going to be placed on the back of my shoulders (I've been told that it's going to hurt like a sonavabitch because of where they're going to be). Best part of all is that these are definitely not going to be my only ones since I have ideas for at least four more that I'm going to get eventually.

Now, I think that anyone who wants to get a tattoo should just do it, but I feel that you should really put some thought into it. If there's one thing I hate, it's people who just get random Sailor Jerry shit without putting any meaning behind it and just getting it because they thought it would be cute.

Real fucking original

This isn't to say that all Sailor Jerry style tattoos are terrible, I just think that if you're going to put something permanent on your body, you should make sure there's some meaning behind it.

Also, anybody out there who is on the fence about whether or not to get a tattoo (or people who already know they want one or people who already have them): you should read Tattoo Machine: My Life in Ink by Jeff Johnson, it's a real good read about the guy's life and he gives his advice on getting tattoos (which really encouraged me to get mine)

Stop what you're doing and read this fucking book right now, you son of a bitch

Rad Thad out, you inked-up people

P.S. I'm over 1,000 views! FUCK YEAH!

Random Fuckery In Quebec City

2011-02-06T19:03:00.000-08:00

So, I'm sure all y'all motherfuckers are off drooling over the SuperBowl and thoroughly denying that there's anything homo-erotic about it despite there being more butt-slapping than a Russian bathhouse in Amsterdam.

I'll just leave this here

Anyway, I'm not really concerned about any of that because I just had the most awesome fucking time in Quebec city. Seriously, it was fucking radical. I was up there for their Winter Carnival, one of the best celebrations I've ever experienced. I'm sure it's a lot different from when it started but now it consists of loud noises, techno beats, snow sculptures, vuvuzelas, and plastic canes that you can fill with alcohol.

Step 1: Fill with beer
Step 2: Drink in public
Step 3: Pass out drunk

Needless to say, my friends and I had a marvelous time, that is, when we weren't busy digesting the Quebecois food of choice: poutine. For those unfamiliar with this most fabulous dish, it consists of french fries which are covered in gravy and then topped with cheese curds. Just looking at this stuff will raise your cholesterol levels. You must be careful however, because once you take your first bite you also take your first step down the road to morbid obesity unless you can maintain proper control.

It may look disgusting, but trust me: it's really fucking delicious

Overall, it was a pretty magnificient trip and I encourage all of you fuckers to go next year, unless you're too much of a pussy and can't take the cold weather.

Rad Thad out, all you BonHommes.

BonHomme, the totally not creepy mascot of Winter Carnival

Sorry Guys

2011-02-03T19:22:00.001-08:00

Sorry, but there's not gonna be a post today, I had a pretty shitty day at work and I'm really burnt out right now. I also won't be posting for the next two days because I'm going up to Quebec with some friends for Winter Carnival. See y'all on Sunday

First Game Review: MNC

2011-02-02T19:44:00.000-08:00

So, due to the snow I had a pretty chillaxed day today and ended up not doing all that much (except for watching A Serbian Film, and man was that fucked up; I think you guys are gonna love the review). Anyway, I spent most of today watching TV and playing videogames (mostly videogames). I wasn't exactly in the mood to play a lot of the games and mods that I already had so first I headed over to ModDB to see if there was anything there I wanted to go for. Unfortunately, no.

I really felt like I wanted something new though, and considering I've been having to pull extra hours at the movie theater, I felt confident that I could afford a good budget title, so I headed off to the Steam Store to check out any deals they were having. This is where two titles caught my eye: Global Agenda and Monday Night Combat.

Now, there were two reasons I really even considered Global Agenda: first of all, it was on sale for $7.50 and there were no subscription fees, and secondly; at a glance it reminded me of PlanetSide.

Man, I loved the 14 day free trial of this game, just not enough to pay $12.99/month for it

Anyway, after viewing a few gameplay videos of GA I decided to go with MNC instead even though it was a little under $7.00 more. Now, I had been vaguely aware of MNC when it came out for XBox Live Arcade but I hadn't really paid much mind to it because it really just seemed like a blatant copy of TF2 that was dumbed down for console players. Because of this, I was pretty surprised when I found out they were releasing it for PC (and that it was going to be distributed by Steam, especially). Again, I just disregarded it as a bad console port and decided not to pre-order it.

Imagine my surprise when I go to PCGamer's website and find that they actually gave MNC their Editor's Choice Award! I was totally baffled, I thought for sure that MNC was just a lame rip off, but if PCG liked that, then I probably would too.

Review after the jump

Monday Night Combat

Basic Overview:

MNC is presented like any all-American sporting event: it has an annoying, washed-out announcer; a metric shit-ton of sponsors, flashy uniforms, and an obnoxious mascot named BullsEye.

He may be annoying, but the devs had the good sense to make one of the objectives in each round to shoot him dead

Even the MNC logo is reminiscent of the NFL, MLB, and NBA. The overall atmosphere of the game really contributes to the gameplay, which I'll talk about riiiiiiiight...now!

Gameplay:

The Gameplay of MNC is fast and frantic, with many of the rounds I played today having complete turnarounds at the very last minute. When I first jumped in, I was immediately reminded of a more well-known tournament-shooter franchise: Unreal. MNC lives up to this comparison very well but still throws in a few twists, but I'll get into that later. Let's look at the game modes, shall we?

Currently, there are only two game modes: Crossfire and Blitz. Crossfire is the most popular so lets delve into that first. Crossfire is somewhat similar to UT's game mode: domination. Two teams of six players are tasked with defending their "MoneyBall" (UT equivalent: Power Core) and destroying the opposing team's one as well.

The orange orb is the MoneyBall
Oh, did I also mention that PA's Fruit Fucker makes an appearance in the game? No?
Well, he does

Now, unlike UT's Domination, you are not capturing control points to destroy the MoneyBalls shield, rather, you are escorting robots across the playing field so they can jump onto it and start humping it just like King Kong did to the empire state building.

Classy

Now, for the most part, you're going to feel like you're committing robot genocide as you try to keep these ball-humpers from violating your sweet, sweet money. However, you still have to go toe-to-toe with other players if you want to score the big bucks and ultimately make the winning much easier.

Now, let's get ready to commit a Robocaust with MNC's only other game-mode: Blitz. Relatively speaking, Blitz is far less popular than Crossfire and most of the servers you're going to find are private. This is all for good reason as Blitz is a far more co-operative game mode and is in no way competitive, unlike Crossfire. Blitz is very similar to L4D's survival mode, though instead of seeing how long you last, you try to see if you can protect your MoneyBall from the orb-molesting masses for 20 rounds. Now, this isn't very difficult, especially if you're playing with friends, but its still a fun experience that can give you something to talk about with your gamer friends later. My only real beef with it is that there's no option for raising the level of difficulty.

Player Classes:

MNC has six distinct that all compliment each other well and I would argue that you would need at least four of them being on your team to really be able to win (I'll get into the other two in a bit). The classes are:

Gunner-

The Gunner is outfitted with a minigun and a mortar cannon. If you choose to mainly play this class (like I did) you're going to want to take on a mostly defensive role against the legions of robots, though it is advisable to rush the enemies base when their MoneyBall's shields are down, since you have a pretty high damage output. You're biggest concerns are going to be the Sniper and Assassin classes, mostly due to your slow movement speed.

Unlike the TF2's maniacal Soviet, MNC's Gunner is portrayed as a laid back Hawaiian
Go Figure

Assault-

As the Assault class you're given an Assault rifle with a wider spread than your mother, and a grenade launcher. The best tactic for this class is to hit hard and fast and occupy the opposing team while your robots move in for the kill. You're mostly going to want to deal with other players if you play this class, don't focus that much of your attention on the robots. Hopefully if you've got a decent Gunner, you won't have to worry about them.

From his general attitude, you almost feel like he might be compensating for something...

Support-

Basically a combination of TF2's Medic and Engineer. You're main concern playing this class is keeping the turrets in your base functioning, and making sure you're team-mates are healed and ready to take a beating. You might also want to set up your portable turret near the enemy's robot spawn to help thin the numbers.

Finally, the videogames industry goes back to its roots: stereotypical Italians

Tank-

A grizzly bear that was given a railgun and a death laser befitting a James Bond villian, that is the best description I can come up with for the Tank. Though I think the devs originally designed him to fill a defensive role, you're mostly going to see him on the frontlines. He's capable of high-damage output and input but his main weakness is the same as the Gunner's: slow movement that make him easy targets for the Assassin and Sniper.

I could really identify with this character if it weren't for the fact that he uses a giant egg as armor

Assassin-

A modern day Ninja with a sword and an arm mounted shuriken-launcher. In short: every weeaboo's wet-dream. As an assassin you will spend most of the game stealthily picking off the enemy team one-by-one like the motherfucking Predator. She can turn completely invisible (though you can see shimmers of her if she gets too close to you) and if she can get behind you to perform an execution move, it's all over.

Seriously, she even has the tri-laser just like the goddamn Predator

Sniper-

Shrill, egotistical, and really fucking annoying: the Sniepr is a caricature of the XBox Live community. If you choose this class, expect to spend most of your time in your base picking off enemies from across the map like a pussy. You can also set ice-traps which freeze opponents in place, making your already risk-free job even easier.

A far cry from TF2's well-mannered Aussie

Now, like I said earlier, I really feel that only four of these classes are really necessary to have in order to win: everyone but the Sniper and Assassin. These are the only classes that could be considered unbalanced. The Sniper has the ability to freeze you in place and easily proceed to spray your gray-matter all over the arena and the Assassin is able to become completely invisible and anally rape you so fast that you barely realize what happened to you before you respawn. For the most part, I really don't feel like these classes are necessary in the game, considering the small size of the MNC's maps (especially the Sniper). Also, if you choose either one of these two classes for Blitz, you might as well sign your teams' death certificates beforehand.

Final Analysis:

MNC is an extremely fun and well-balanced game that is worth far more than its price of $14.99 (Not that I'm encouraging them to jack up their price, I just feel they could have asked for at least $30.00 and it would've seemed reasonable). If you've got the money, I highly encourage any and all to go buy it.

OVERALL: 9/10

Gameplay: 9/10

Crossfire: 10/10

Blitz: 8/10

Balance: 9/10

Humor: 7/10

420 Views

2011-02-01T18:42:00.000-08:00

Hey guys, thought I'd just post a quick thing and point out that I got 420 views on my blog!

YOU ALL KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS

LePage does not approve

That's all I got until tomorrow

Rad Thad out, you red-eyed people

Winter is so Fucking Awesome

2011-02-01T13:49:00.000-08:00

I'm gonna lay some heavy information on you fuckers: I live in Maine.

Let that digest for a moment.

I've lived in Maine since I was born, and, being a true Mainer, I fucking love Winter and its byproduct: snow. I love snow so fucking much, and if you don't love snow I want nothing to do with you.

Look at this
LOOK AT THIS
IT'S...FUCKING...BEAUTIFUL

I'm telling you all this because its currently snowing like a motherfucker just outside my window and I'm just getting total ecstasy from it. Some of you may be wondering "Is this really the only reason he's telling us this?"

My answer? No.

I'm telling you this because Winter is not the only thing I love about Maine, it's nature in general that totally just sets me off. Unfortunately, the dumb motherfucker who about a third of the state managed to elect because the rest of us were trying to get absolutely anybody else into the Governor's office actually won (Seriously, a majority of Maine would've rather had a shit-stained piece of toilet paper win than this dumb cunt). For those of you who don't keep up on Maine politics, I'm talking about Paul LePage.

I hate this motherfucker

Now before any of you freak out; no, I'm not just some raging hippie liberal who immediately hates anyone who isn't part of my flowerchild commune. I was willing to give LePage a chance after he won the election. I mean, I was still upset but I figured "Hey, fuck it, might as well give this bastard a chance. Who knows, maybe he'll actually do a good job." WRONG

Since this fucker got elected all he's basically done is make Maine look like a state of complete redneck assholes who couldn't complete a basic algebra problem even if they really fucking tried. On top of all his gross incompetence he's basically pledged to all of the Tea Party retards that he's gonna rape Maine's woodlands, and rape them hard.

In short, I really wanted to give LePage a chance, but he's just a dumb motherfucker.

Rad Thad out, you bloggin' people.

P.S. Because of the aforementioned snow I actually have the day off from work tomorrow so I'm gonna start working on my first movie review. It might be up tomorrow but I wouldn't hold your breath.

P.P.S. If you want to discuss politics in the comments feel free, just please don't post shit like "DURR I HAET CONSERVATIVES BECUZ THEYRE NAZIS" or "HERP A DERP, ALL LIBURULS SHUD DIE BECUZ THE LORD JEZUS TOLD ME THAT GUN CONTRL IS BAD HURR.,"

Humility is Pretty Fucking Dumb

2011-01-31T13:44:00.000-08:00

In case you idiots haven't noticed yet, I have an ego about the size of our solar system, and I'm damn proud of it too. I feel we live in a society that does way too much to humble itself and gives itself barely any credit for all the awesome shit that we do. This isn't to say that I feel we should never be humble; I myself, when proven wrong (which is pretty fucking rare), will admit it and allow others to teach me. What I'm against are the sort of people who go on about shit like "we're all sinners who don't deserve heaven". First of all, who the Hell wants to spend eternity in a gated community anyway. Secondly, everyone is capable of being awesome enough to deserve something far greater than that pie in the sky bullshit. I want you guys to listen to these next ten words carefully:

You are only as awesome as you think you are

Seriously think that over for a second, because I know you will realize that it is the fucking truth. How are you going to accomplish anything if you're constantly belittling yourself and thinking you're not worthy. Forget what all those fucking preachers have said and break down those barriers. If you make your ego big enough, the whole fucking Universe is the limit. I do, however, want to stress that it's important to not get too cocky, and, like I said earlier, allow for others to prove you wrong. To maintain that you're still right after others prove you wrong just turns you into a douche and makes you considerably less awesome.

I love each and everyone of you motherfuckers

Rad Thad out, you amazing people

The Basics of My Random Fuckery

2011-01-30T17:27:00.000-08:00

Now, usually when someone starts a blog they do a basic outline of what their content is going to be like so you, the ~~dumbfuck~~ reader, knows whether or not you want to follow said blog (In my case, I'm incredibly awesome so you'll follow me no matter what I do).

I'm not like all those other bloggers. You want to know what sets me apart?

I'm

Fucking

Awesome

This is obvious considering that I skipped all that bullshit with my first post and got straight to my kick-ass opinion on the Egypt riots (You should read that article right now if you haven't already, it'll give you an idea of how much better I am than you). I, however, have now decided to inform you of what's in store for all y'all motherfuckers by laying out the various content that I will be posting.

Opinion Articles

This is going to be my most basic form of expression. As you've already seen with my first post these will consist of my opinions on various things going on in the world and in my life. Most of the time these will exhibit my most excellent vocabulary (As demonstrated in my first post) but sometimes I may need to calm down and talk in a civil manner (i.e. like a pussy)

My Opinions=Truth

Movie Reviews

I currently work at a movie theater to help pay my bills and this has fostered somewhat of a deep obsession with fine cinema (read: gore exploitation films for the most part). Because of my discerning tastes I wish to write reviews so that you, the reader, may know which movies you have to see and you are a complete and utter waste of skin if you don't; and which ones are so utterly terrible that I would rather fuck myself with a razor dildo than figuratively skull-fuck myself by watching them. I may also do riffs of certain films if I get the time.

This is probably the first one I'm going to review
Get ready to vomit

Video Game/Mod Reviews

Like many others on the internet today, I'm all too familiar with going on virtual killing-sprees and enacting my most sadistic fantasies in the digital realm. I'm also a cheap-skate, so most of the video-games I actually play are mods. In truth, though I play probably an upwards of 40 different games, there's only about six or so that I've had to pay for, the rest being some seriously kick-ass mods. If I get enough of a following (Which I'm sure I will, considering I'm basically Jesus 2.0) I hope I may be able to interview some mod developers.

This rules my life

That's all for now, you glorious bastards, Rad Thad out.

Welcome one and all to Rad Thad's Blog of Random Fuckery

2011-01-30T09:51:00.000-08:00

In case you fuckers couldn't read the title, you're currently viewing Rad Thad's Blog of Random Fuckery. I'm Thad (of course you dumbfucks), and I'm here to impart upon you any tidbits of my knowledge and also my own opinions on the general fuckery that goes on around the world.

FIRST ON THE FUCKERY LIST: EGYPT

Egypt, FUCK YEAH

Jesus Christ, these Egyptians have got some serious brass balls with what they're doing right now. Have you seen any of these videos? They are trashing everything. I mean, these are just civilians and they are fucking taking on APC's fer chrissake.

Now, some of you may be wondering "But Thad, do you agree with what they are doing?" and the answer is: of course I do you thick piece of shit. In my opinion, this is what it should look like when you're overthrowing a corrupt government, not that pussy "Blogger Revolution" bullshit that happened over in Tunisia.

Citizens of Egypt, you get my seal of approval.

Rad Thad out, you fucking pansies.