Rambles of the Wandering Mind

Bura na maano, holi hai! (Don’t mind, it’s Holi!)

2019-03-18T23:46:00.000-04:00

In the week leading up to Holi, a bunch of bananas sits on the island reaching a peak over-ripeness that is perfect for malpuas. Early in the morning on Holi, the tantalizing aroma of the freshly fried “banana pancakes” wafts through the house. Only about half the batch sugar-syrup drenched yumminess makes it to the evening family visits. The first one or two are consumed in the name of quality control — we can’t possibly serve imperfect sweets to the aunties and uncles! No one fesses up to having sneaked the rest throughout the day, but you know dad had at least one.

Maybe your family makes gujias instead? Or mathris? Whatever you make, Holi is an opportunity to indulge in all sorts of sweet delicacies after a day of playing with abeer (colored powder) and gulaal (colored water).

To the uninitiated, we introduce Holi as the festival of colors, a celebration of the triumph of good over evil, a welcoming of the spring season. A crazy fun time with friends and family. At its core, I think Holi is a celebration of the perseverance of faith.

According to the Puranas, King Hiranyakashipu’s faith is rewarded with a boon that makes him nearly invincible. But his faith is selfish, born of an ego that makes him forget that no one is above God (Vishnu). His son, Prahlad, on the other hand, has an unwavering faith in Vishnu. Spoiler alert, Prahlad’s faith in Vishnu triumphs over Hiranyakashipu’s narcissism.

In other mythology stories, Kama (the Hindu Cupid), interrupts Shiva during a meditative state and is immediately vanquished. Rati, Kama’s wife, meditates for 40 days, demonstrating her faith. This convinces Shiva to revive the God of love, and Kama’s return is celebrated as Holi, 40 days after Vasant Panchami.

Holi 2016 - a tamer celebration than usual

We smear color on each other because Krishna was afraid Radha and the other Gopis wouldn’t like him because of his blue skin, but his mother had faith the girls would see past his color and love him anyway.

As with everything in India, Holi is celebrated in a unique way in each state. From a seven-day mela (fair) in Kanpur (outside of Braj), to the Dol Jatra in West Bengal, where images or statues of Krishna and Radha are paraded through the town on a decorated swing, to Lathmar Holi in Uttar Pradesh where the ladies get to “beat up” the men with laathis (long sticks) in jest, and Holla Mohalla, a display of martial arts prowess of Sikhs in Punjab, Holi brings together entire communities in the spirit of forgiveness and uninhibited happiness.

Whether you’re in India, the USA, or Guyana, nearly everyone starts the Holi celebrations with a bonfire on Choti Holi, the night before the colorful celebration. This is a nod to the story of Holika, King Hiranyakashipu’s demoness sister who tried to destroy Prahlad in a pyre but ended up perishing herself.

If you’re celebrating a tame Holi, with polite smears of dry color on each other’s faces, you can deck out in whatever you like. If you’re like me and plan on taking a long shower afterwards, wondering how you still have color in your hair days later, you might have a designated set of “Holi clothes” that come out once year, faint patches of color a testament to past years of fun.

The day’s not over until you’ve washed away the colors, gorged on too much food and mithai, and enjoyed a silly, relaxed time with family and friends. The lighthearted day is our annual reminder that as long as we hold strong throughout the year, there will always be something to celebrate.

Goal Setting in 2017 - Free Download included

2017-02-02T01:58:00.000-05:00

You've had a month to set, try, and break your resolutions. Ready for some real goal-setting now?

I used to set these too-vague, too-ambitious goals like "lose weight", "eat healthy", "blog more", blah, blah. In 2012 I even started blogging about my resolutions as a way to be more accountable. If I tell the world, I'll look stupid if I don't follow through, right? You can see it was easy to fudge the results (well, I didn't blog more, but I have plenty of drafts) or justify excuses (I didn't lose the weight, but I had a busy schedule & my back hurt, so really, how was I supposed to?).

For various reasons, 2012 was a pivotal year for me. I got fed up with the same old status quo lifestyle and motivated to improve, grow, learn, and develop myself. I'm no closer to perfection or anything. Instead, with each change over the past four years, I've noticed I feel more happy, satisfied, content, balanced, grounded ... aren't these the things we strive for in life?

2016 was a light bulb year. I scrapped making resolutions altogether. Resolutions are firm decisions and they sound like an ultimatum. They are too heavy with expectations and carry a tone of impending failure. My new strategy was to set up goals. Goals are things I can work towards. Goals are things I can break down into little steps and chip away at over the course of year. It's okay if I don't hit 100% on them, because any progress means I've achieved something more than what I started with.

With that in mind, I opened up Excel and got cracking in January 2016. Was I 100% successful on everything? Nope! Did I get closer than the three years prior? Abso-freaking-lutely! I felt so much better, more accomplished and satisfied, at the end of 2016 than I had in the years prior. I could chart my progress over the course of the year, adjust my expectations, and tweak my plans as I went along.

The spreadsheets were a good starting point, but I wanted to change the way I approached 2017. I did a lot of research, tapped into my business analysis and project management skills/tools, and customized some worksheets to create a package that works for me.

1. Reflect. I start with a sheet for reflection. Working on projects has taught me that it's important to look back and reflect on the things that did and didn't work. It's equally important to recognize the successes and learn a lesson from the failures or problems.

2. Dream Big. Then it's time to brainstorm/braindump. There's no right or wrong. There's no feasible or impossible. There's a just a blank page of space giving you permission to dream your biggest dreams, divulge your secret desires, and be as silly or serious as you want. If the dreams don't make you happy, are they worth pursuing?

3. Set Goals & Plan. Now it's time to start getting serious. I broke my life out into eight areas of focus: Personal, Finance, Professional, Health, Family, Friends/Social, Romantic/Relationship, and Spiritual. You can set one or more goals for each of these categories. Or you could skip some categories for now. Or you could replace them with other categories that are particular to you. The idea is to start organizing your long term big dreams into short term big goals. It's okay to keep it at "loose weight" or "read more" in this part of the planning.

4. Planning. Okay, now we start to hone in on the goals to make them manageable and achievable. I may have scoffed at the idea of SMART goals at one point (Specific, Measureable, Achievable, Relevant, Time bound), but life just gets easier when you put your goals in SMART terms. If you're avoiding making a goal SMART, you're probably not committed to following through on that goal. Don't set yourself up for failure; come back to the goal when you are ready for it. The Business Analyst in me asserted itself by asking particular questions to help really sharpen my goals. The Project Manager in me was a tad gleeful over figuring out risks and resources. What can I say? I love my work!

If you follow me on social media, you know I like the reward system. It really works for me to celebrate small victories along the way to achieving my goal. So I built the proverbial carrots right into my planning worksheets.

5. Commit. I came across two lists of things to commit to in any given year: giving up, learning, seeing, etc. I liked the concept and thought it was a good brainstorming tool. Plus, I'm a sucker for lists. So I snagged the categories I liked from each version and compiled my own list.

As I tell all my project peeps - use what you like, scrap what you don't, and tweak it suit your needs. I hope the worksheets and my explanations help. Let me know if you have any questions or would like to see examples of my filled out worksheets.

Download Goal Setting Worksheets

UPDATE: I've tweaked the sheets a tiny bit (because there's always room for improvement) and added a bonus sheet.

6. Word of the Year. I discovered the concept as a trending new year thing in December 2015, liked it, and tried it out for 2016. I liked it so much, I took it to work and even had a word of the year for my professional life. These words (or phrases) worked like a mantra for me throughout the year, a touchstone that kept me in check and my efforts more focused. I really thing they helped me grow, be more intentional, and achieve more than if I'd been attempting my goals without them.

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FYI 1: The information used to create my custom sheets are combination of my brain's way of organizing information, my BA and PM knowledge, and free-to-use templates by other planning-inclined folks. To the best of my knowledge, I haven't taken anything that is copyrighted or plagiarized from other sources.

FYI 2: This post was much longer in coming because I've been completely consumed by the political scene in the US. My views are very obvious on other social media platforms, but I'll try my best to keep this space neutral.

Karma in Practice

2015-01-18T12:15:00.000-05:00

I'm taking "you get what you give" to heart this year. Having already resolved to "be more conscientious" in 2015, I'm adding some goals, admittedly ~~stolen from~~ inspired by Kelsey Gryniewicz's post "15 Ways to Start 2015 with Kindness".

I'm not going with all 15 ideas, because let's be honest, change takes time and that's just too much kindness in one shot ;). I whittled it down to nine that really spoke to me, two of which will look familiar (and I've kept up with!!!).

Year of Kindness Box - the idea is to fill up the box with things like thank you notes (Who writes those any more? Sadly, hardly anyone), compliments received (I can't believe I already have something for the box), moments of kindness witnessed or done, inspiring quotes, etc. Then I get to review at the end of the year or any time I'm having an off day. (side note: hello artsy-crafty project!)
Create a Gratitude Journal - well you've already seen this on my resolutions list. I'm glad I went with doing a weekly journal instead of a daily, because I've already failed on my other daily aspirations. Much easier to set aside 5-10 minutes once a week, instead of a few minutes every day. I know, lazy me.

Simi's Weekly Gratitude Journal - 2015
Three Compliments - Compliment ~~the first~~ three people you talk to. If I stuck to the first three, it would always be my family. I think I do this any way, but it won't hurt to be more conscientious about it.
52 Thank You Notes - Write a thank you note every week to a different person. I've "missed" the first two, but I'll definitely be doing this all year. And no email business. I picked up cute thank you cards from Target (a lot of them!) before I even read about or considered this "challenge." Thank you fate.
Daily Positivity - Every day, think of a random person. Send them a positive positive message (text, email, social media post, phone call, letter, etc.). This is another one of those I'm sure I do this every day without thinking about it, but, again, it'll be good to put some real thought into it on a daily basis. Putting positive energy in the world should only mean that positive energy comes back, if Newton was really, really right ;).
Volunteer - Another one that had already been on my list. Now to figure out how to accomplish this.
Smile - Smiling is all sorts of good for you: release of endorphins, boost your immune system, and more. Say cheese!
Self-Kindness - Do one kind thing every week for yourself - enjoy a treat you love, exercise, do something you love and rarely have time to do. For now, this is going to be my Art/Craft project of the week. If and when that becomes a part of my routine, I'll move on to something new.

Now, to figure out what my bad habits are and which one to break. Introspection is hard! Who's going to help me with this one? ;)

2015 Resolutions

2015-01-05T01:36:00.000-05:00

There’s something reassuring about having an outline of a plan for the coming year. Putting my resolutions on the web helps keep me more accountable (barring 2014) and gives me the satisfaction of checking things off into the “Done List”.

I've yo-yo'ed back into the double digits with my resolutions this year. I’m being a bit more diligent with the planning and success criteria with each. Hopefully that will result in more passes than fail whales. *fingers crossed*

2015 Resolutions

1. Keep a closer eye and tighter fist on my finances. There may have been copious spending in 2014; some splurging, some necessities, and some way in advance, “just in case” purchases. Now that I’m a grown up with a career path and everything, I suppose it’s time to be a bit more fiscally responsible by

a. Doing the 52 week money saving challenge.

b. Limiting myself to 5 extras/splurges per month.

c. Potentially getting a second source of income. Writing articles was fun for a bit. Or a personal shopper? There isn’t much of a market around here for that. I’ll figure it out.

2. Do the PopSugar Ultimate Reading Challenge. If my math is right, that’s 52 books, so one book per week. And we’re already past week one. Oops! Better get on it. Any recommendations readers?

3. Be creative

a. Do one DIY or household project (digitizing all print photos) per month. This is more on the handy side.

b. Do one craft project per week. This is more on the artsy side.

c. Write a minimum of five lines per day. I’m definitely behind on this. Better start working on the 20 pending lines and work on today’s five as well.

4. Break a bad habit.*

5. Be more conscientious

a. Maintain a weekly “Things I am Grateful For” journal. (First craft project of the year!). The original journal idea is a 365

b. Be more in touch with those who matter, especially my grandparents. The more advanced communication becomes, the harder it seems to get to be really in touch with those who matter.

c. Do a good deed/get involved in social service or a volunteering effort. I used to do a lot of volunteering when I was in high school; while life wasn’t perfect, there was a sense of peace that I think volunteering gave me. I’m also a glutton for instant gratification, and nothing works better than giving back to the community.

6. Learn a new skill. As usual. Poaching an egg is on my “bucket list” (see number 9).

7. Vacation with Mishal. We haven’t hung out since Bermuda, which means it’s been too long. Time for another epic time together. What’s your favorite place to go for a relaxing time? I’m in the mood to just chill and take a breather from life.

8. Visit a new place. This should, by default, be fulfilled by number 7.

9. Revise bucket list and cross off one item. Poach an egg, make Crème Brule, try making a soufflé, visit a whole sub-bucket list of places, etc., etc... I’m still working on it.

10. Take a risk* – huge maybe! In theory, it sounds good. I’ll let the year play itself out and see what opportunities come my way.

11. Secret resolution – to be revealed if it’s a success. ;)

*Inspired by the 2014 resolutions on http://taytayhser.blogspot.com/

2014 in Reflection

2015-01-03T01:03:00.000-05:00

2014 was a blur. I say this every year, but really 2014 flew by so fast 2013 memories blended in a bit. It's been a year of learning, growth, and good moments, very few of which had to do with my resolutions. I'm okay with that because I burst beyond my Jar 'o' Good Stuff and had to break out a Box 'o' Good Stuff (both of which are ~~missing~~ really safely packed up). Top moments of 2014 were definitely the new (bigger!) home we've recently moved into, getting a mini-promotion in my job, and our trip to India.

Right, onto the 2014 Resolutions.

Success

1. Strengthen myself educationally and career-wise. In an utterly non-humble admission, I’m doing quite well in the career department. In the hierarchy of the New York state hiring system, I don’t sit very high. But in the skills and knowledge department, I've learned and applied more in one year than some (many) people have in their entire civil service career. I got lucky, having Business Analysis fall in my lap and turn out to be a perfect career switch.

I can’t imagine what dead-beat, entry-level job I could be stuck at right now, if things hadn't worked out in my favor (because an English degree and partial medical school experience can only get you so far). To anyone who is confused about their career plans, give state service (or federal service) a serious consideration; the job security and perks (such as health insurance) alone are worth it.

3. Tap into my creative side more: painting, writing, dancing, photography, and whatever else I can get into. I haven’t necessarily done more creative work, but I've kept at it and the tail end of 2014 saw a burst of productivity. Photographic proof to be found at my Instagram. Especially fun were the projects at the Pottery Place and the one with the chalkboard paint. (PS – Don’t judge the results. I haven’t done pottery glazing in well over a decade.)

4. Learn a new skill - always, always, always! Does putting together four bar stools all on my own count as a new skill? A men’s valet stand? How about re-familiarizing myself with the dreadful Facebook? I did become a Certified Scrum Master in March of this year, and have since applied those skills to my job.

5. Go on a vacation. I'd originally wanted to go on 2-3, but for now I'll settle for one vacation. My proper and uber long vacation was a month in India, and even that wasn't a vacation so much as it was a trip. Twenty eight days, ten cities, seven trains, five planes, two day trips, one major festival, an army event, and roughly 150 kg (330 lbs.) worth of shopping constitute something closer to an expedition in my books.

Curbside Gods - Pray anytime, anywhere.

Fail Whale

2. Cook more - there's Mom's collection of recipes to learn, plus so many recipe books that are just lying in the basement, collecting dust. The collection of cook books were dusted off, only to be boxed and moved to the new home (we have a new home). This was a washout resolution. I’ll considered it salvaged if I can poach an egg before the year’s end. That leaves me two days. Yikes! ETA: egg has not been poached.

6. Read more! Good Reads tells me I didn't read much. I took in more profession-related articles and news pieces, which isn't the type of reading I’d meant when writing down that resolution, but at least it’s something.

7. Blog more (haha, what an inspiring start!) Blogging was non-existent. Lots of good intentions, a fair few drafts, but nada on the actual blogging front. The good news is, this means I have plenty of drafts to polish up and present to you in the coming year.

8. Cross off 1 item from my bucket list. I tend to avoid this as a resolution, but I think 2014 is the year to achieve something! I took a look at my resolutions list, and I believe it’s time to reconsider. The dreams of yesterday aren't necessarily the hopes for tomorrow.

Where has 2014 gone!?

2014-09-01T08:04:00.000-04:00

Resolutions for 2014

1. Strengthen myself educationally and career-wise

2. Cook more – there’s mom’s collection of recipes to learn, plus so many recipe books that are just lying in the basement, collecting dust.

3. Tap into my creative side more: painting, writing, dancing, photography, and whatever else I can get into.

4. Learn a new skill – always, always, always!

5. Go on a vacation. I’d originally wanted to go on 2-2, but for now I’ll settle for one vacation.

6. Read more!

7. Blog more (haha, what an inspiring start!)

8. Cross off 1 item from my bucket list. I tend to avoid this as a resolution, but I think 2014 is the year to achieve something!

This year has positively flown, with no by your leave or excuse me. I swear it was May just yesterday, and here we are saying hello to September already. It doesn't make any sense. I didn't cook more (oops, #2), I didn't blog at all (sorry #7), and the only dent I've made in my creative exploration (#3) is stockpiling canvasses and paint as if it’s my job (I’m such a shopaholic!). I’d cross off a bucket list item (#8), if I could only find my bucket list (I swear I lose more stuff when I clean). I have done a fair amount of reading, exploring new authors and genres (#6, you can breathe). And I do still have 3 months to redeem myself, so maybe 2014 won’t be a complete wash. Four out of eight…is that a new record low for me?

This has been my first year as a non-student. Hello adulthood. I’m doing well at work (really well, thankfully). I've gotten a certification that makes my resume look a little prettier, and gives me useful skills that I apply to my work (#1 and #4, check and check).

I’d been working out pretty intensively in the first half of the year. That, coupled with a round or two of juicing helped me drop some weight and get healthier. Score for a non-resolution win! Side effect of working out: my back is busted again. Between doctors, meds, and physical therapy, I've been better, more functional for the past couple of years. But at the beginning of this summer I could feel my back reacting the same way that it had in 2012. Long story short, I was smart this time and went to a chiropractor right away. (More about that experience later…I promise!) Three months later, I’m doing much better, though still not optimal, and definitely not back to a state where I can be working out.

Which kinda sucks because we’re going to India in October (knocked #5 out of the park!). I’ll be going back after 10 years. Holy! I would have loved to be more in shape, but hey ho, this is my lot and I’m choosing to accept it instead of wishing and regretting. It’ll be a fairly long trip, with stops along a few places in northern India. I’m really looking forward to spending time with my Nana-Nani, meeting relatives I've never even heard of, and shopping. There’s an army celebration that we will be attending; it will be interesting to meet my contemporaries. Hello awkward times? Maybe it’ll be good times. *fingers crossed*

Despite the rushed feeling, there have been plenty of good times in 2014 - my "Jar o' Good Stuff" is so stuffed I've had to expand. I've been to three baby showers, which is exactly three more than I've ever been to. One ladies sangeet. One wedding reception. A few graduations. A birthday party that involved a belly dancer. A birthday party that involved a toddler. A random party that involved an uncle insistently serving everyone alcohol – now that was awkward! I made friends with kids who are now grownups, and observed grownups who have behaved worse than children. My social life has been entertaining (okay, more accurately, it’s my parents’ social life. In my defense, my friends are scattered around the world – Atlanta, Toronto, Chicago, San Diego, India, Croatia…just a tiny bit hard to get together with these peeps from Albany, NY). I’m getting involved in…what do adults call extracurricular activities? Whatever it’s called, I’m doing more of that. The balance is definitely tipped to the positive side in 2014.

I just have to get cracking on the rest of my resolutions now, so ta!

2013 in Reflection

2014-03-22T17:59:00.000-04:00

2013 in Reflection

2013 whizzed by so fast, I'm still dizzy! Overall, it was a good year. I participated in two research conferences, interned in a PR position (so that's one off my career experience "bucket list"), got a job, and graduated from UAlbany. If there were things that didn't go as smoothly as I'd hoped, well these highlights have completely overshadowed them.

Successes
1. Keep up with blogging - I catapulted to 20 blogs in 2012. I squeaked in 21 in 2013. Thank God I worded my resolution as "keep up" not "blog very frequently" or "blog on a consistent/regular basis".

2. Keep up with reading - I'm not entirely sure how many books I read, but since I graduated with a degree in English, it was a fair number. (Irish literature ... not really my thing, as it happens).

4. Get a job - check!

5. Learn a new skill - again. Yeah, there's been plenty of on-the-job training and I've certainly picked up skills there. Plus the research conferences and the internship - lots of small and medium-sized skill picked up along the way from all of that.

9. Get back in touch with Caitlin - done. Now to make the effort to stay in touch. Something I'm not too brilliant at all the time. (speaking of which, excuse me while I go wish someone a quick happy birthday)

12. Get healthier - Am I at optimal health? No! Am I healthier? Yes. Lost some more weight. Hitting the gym more often. Eating better - no crash diets though. Those don't work. At all.

Fail-whale
3. Do 4+ photo challenges - why do I bother? Unless you count half-assedly doing some Instagram challenge of the month series, no, this definitely did not happen.

6. Stop enabling Person X - This was just such an unhealthy way to think and go about things. Moving on!

7. Vacation with Mishal! - Because it's high time we hung out and were crazy together! I have the best times with this girl!

8. Move to Atlanta - All part of moving on with life. Whichever direction things go in, I think it's time I became more independent.

11. Do at least 1 crafty project - see. Now I'm being super honest. I'm not counting the spray-painting I did, because really, even a five year old can do that. *hangs head in shame*

WIP

10. Help Mom out more - baby steps. I'm just used to doing things my way in my own time. Gets awkward not being the person in charge when you're back home.

13. Make myself Priority #1 - over the course of the year I've learned to moderate this and work on the little things that add up to making myself #1. I'm going to (try to) put that into practice in 2014. *fingers crossed*

Though the To-Do/Memory Board is roughly the same.

The Jar O' Good Stuff filled up quite a bit.

Maybe I can get crafty and put all of this in a scrap book. (Maybe!)

(Belated) Happy New Year! - 2014 Resolutions

2014-03-17T02:30:00.000-04:00

This year is flying by even faster than the last. 2014 has been so cold, it's taken me a couple of months to thaw into things. It hasn't been quite the clean slate start that I like to have at the beginning of a year; the dust and faint marks of 2013 are still lingering in the air. I'm hoping the transition into Spring will blow out some of the stale remnants of 2013 and bring more focus to 2014.

My original list of resolutions disappeared on me. I think the piece of paper knew better and walked away in time for me to realize that 2014 isn't following any plans or intentions. January, February, and half of March have really given me a chance to reconsider, reevaluate, and revise my resolutions.

Hopefully this list is more comprehensive and realistic (in no order of priority):

1. Strengthen myself educationally and career-wise.
2. Cook more - there's Mom's collection of recipes to learn, plus so many recipe books that are just lying in the basement, collecting dust.
3. Tap into my creative side more: painting, writing, dancing, photography, and whatever else I can get into.
4. Learn a new skill - always, always, always!
5. Go on a vacation. I'd originally wanted to go on 2-3, but for now I'll settle for one vacation.
6. Read more!
7. Blog more (haha, what an inspiring start!)
8. Cross off 1 item from my bucket list. I tend to avoid this as a resolution, but I think 2014 is the year to achieve something!

2013's thirteen resolutions weren't 100% successful (2013 in Reflection), so hopefully eight is more realistic!

Christmas Shopping with a Purpose - Top 5 Places to Turn to This Christmas

2013-12-02T06:00:00.000-05:00

There's nothing better than piles of gifts under a Christmas tree. The rush of joy, the excitement, the happiness, are unbeatable. Except. They are. What's better than a pile of goodies? A pile of goodies that pay it forward!

There are many ways to make a difference in our communities, especially around holiday season: volunteer at a soup kitchen, donate to Toys for Tots, make a donation to your charity of choice.

You can also shop to change the world around you. Here are some places you can shop for both your Christmas list AND to help pay it forward. (And just in time for Cyber Monday!)

1. International Princess Project - a company that is "creating pathways to freedom for women escaping sex slavery" in India. Not only is IPP helping end human trafficking, it creates an opportunity for more than 150 women and girls to learn a trade (sewing beautiful "Punjammies") that help sustain a new hope and a new lifestyle. I'm all for shopping for "fashion that takes a stand against human trafficking" - the pajamas and shirts are truly beautiful and unique, and will be appreciated by any mom, sister, wife, girlfriend, daughter...

With a sweet deal on #CyberMonday (40% off + free shipping on orders over $50),
they definitely have a spot on my Christmas shopping list.

Twitter: @Int'lPrincessProject

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2. Three Avocados - this one's for the coffee lovers (that's right, nothing to do with avocados). It's a non-profit that puts 100% of its net earnings to clean water in Uganda. Clean water is a global problem, especially in developing nations. There are many initiatives that are working toward providing sustainable clean water resources. The perk with buying directly through Three Avocados is, you're guaranteed that 100% of your money is going to be used to make a direct impact.

Having actually tried the coffee, I can confidently say it's delicious! A rich, warm coffee that makes you feel good for all sorts of reasons!

Coffee for a Cause - packaged just right for Christmas! :)

Twitter: @ThreeAvocados

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3. Blanket America - it isn't just about blankets. It's about all sorts of bedding, and towels, and window treatments. And helping. Most importantly, it's about the helping: "generating automatic donations" with every purchase, and helping the company's commitment to "ending extreme poverty." This "buy 1, give 1" model doesn't just help make a direct impact for the American community. It also contributes to disaster relief in Haiti and Blanket America's Choose Haiti mission.

Beautiful bedding and blankets under your tree,
an end to poverty in the US and disaster relief in Haiti.

Twitter: @BlanketAmerica

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4. Toms Shoes - a very straight-forward one for one company: every pair of shoe you buy means a free pair of shoes for children in need around the world. Toms has expanded to "providing prescription glasses, medical treatmetn and/or sight-saving surgery" for every eyewear purchased by you. Over 10 million pairs of shoes and 150,000 visions restored because of purchases made by us. Toms has a lot of other cute products as well - really, a little something for everyone! Every purchase leads to the delivery of provisions, healthcare, opportunities, education, and training for hundreds of thousands of people around the world.

$10 off $50 purchases, free shipping through December 2, AND a holiday gift guide - Toms has you covered!

Twitter: @TOMS

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5. Warby Parker - a pair of stylish glasses for you or someone on your list means funding and/or glasses to VisionSpring and other non-profit partners, training for low-income entrepreneurs who are looking to start their own glasses-selling business, affordable glasses for communities across the globe, and lives that are bettered from your purchase. Warby Parker takes the "buy 1, give 1" and takes it a step further: the company doesn't just provide a product to the customer and an individual from the developing global community, it creates a community of self-enabled individuals and a chain of success stories - that's over 500,000 lives touched to date.

A sweet new pair for you can mean vision for the first time for someone who was struggling before.

Twitter: @WarbyParker

Of course, your shopping at these sites doesn't have to be limited to the holiday season. These make great gifts or shopping experiences year round. The satisfaction of having paid it forward just can't be beat!

(This is not an exhaustive list of companies that follow a one for one model or support shopping with a cause. Some other social good companies are listed in this shop with meaning article. I'm sure there are many other companies - google is your friend!)

Gifts for Guys (especially dads)

2013-12-01T15:12:00.001-05:00

We've all been there. Father's Day sneaks up on you, or you keep putting off buying Dad a birthday gift in search of the perfect thing. Men are ridiculously hard to shop for, since you can only buy them so many wallets, belts, colognes, and ties before the collection turns into a hoarding.

Here are a few ideas I've recently turned to with great success:

1) Monogrammed handkerchief - I lucked on a set of these and picked them up because my dad uses a handkerchief on a daily basis. He absolutely loved them, to the point where he didn't open the box for a few months because they were "too special" and nice. Thankfully, he's since used them on special occasions (or when the rest are in the laundry!)

2) A bottle (or case) of special alcohol - if he's a beer drinker, find him some local brew. If he's into wine, treat him to an extra special bottle - you can even pair this with a wine tasting at a local vineyard if possible, or a fancy meal (some restaurants allow you to bring in your own bottle - check before making a reservation). If it's any other alcohol and he's running low, show him you pay attention and get him a bottle that he'll appreciate for some time.

3) Tickets to a game/show/concert that he would enjoy. If he wants to take you along, but you're not particularly into it - suck it up! You're doing something to make him happy, so consider all the times he's probably bit his tongue and gone along with what you want. It's only fair to return the favor.

4) A meal made from scratch - foodies love it when you make the extra effort, and everyone knows the way to a man's heart is through his stomach ;) If he's the one who's into cooking, find a local restaurant that does lessons in pizza making or whatever their thing is. Some places offer one-day classes in ethnic cuisines; if he's adventurous, that's an opportunity he would love.

5) A massage appointment - even if they don't admit it, most men like to be pampered once in a while. If it's been a stressful time, they'll really appreciate this...and probably get hooked!

2013 Check In #3

2013-11-23T01:23:00.000-05:00

I have been wanting to update this blog for the longest time - hell, I've got 3-4 hauls I've been wanting to post about among other posts that are already drafted, but life has just been busy! Clearly, blogging took a back seat, despite the best of intentions.

A whopping 3 months later, I've got enough work accomplished to justify a break. Mind's still a bit preoccupied with everything else, so I'll just do a run through of my resolutions and general check in.

1. Blogging, as previously mentioned, took a hit post August. Reasons to follow.

2. Per force I've kept up with the reading - 4 English courses in one semester is no joke. Lots of diverse reading - from 20th century Irish literature to short stories by fellow classmates in a writing workshop class.

3. Four or more photo challenges!? Who was I kidding! What I have done, instead, is started an Instagram account. This is a much easier way of making sure I'm doing some photography throughout the year. I've also half-assed my way through 3 photo months, and there's still December to come, so I'll consider this fait accompli. Note to self: don't set yourself up for more photo challenges in 2014!

4. Get a job. Well, wouldn't you know it - I ended up with TWO jobs this year. AND two internships (not all simultaneously, though it was a close thing). Hurray! First job was the freelance writing, which I had to forego because my schedule got insane (full time student in my last semester, an internship and a job with the state didn't leave much room for homework and sleep, let alone interviewing and writing up articles).

5. Learn a new skill - I am a recent "graduate" of Project Management training. I'm also learning SO MANY new things on the job with Business Analysis.

7. Vacation with Mishal didn't happen this year - but plans for next year have started! Legit plans! March is happening!!! I could really use the time off.

8. Move to Atlanta - now did I really think I'd be moving to Atlanta? Move somewhere, someday, yes. Move to Atlanta in 2013, not so much. Silly me!

9. Mission get back in touch with Caitlin is a success - now to actually meet her in person again. I've got a giant hug lined up :)

10. Help Mom out more - was derailed because the focus was to finish strong in undergrad. December 10th evening onward, I'll be helping more around the house with everything.

11. Do at least one crafty project. Well, I spray painted a couple of things and did rice rangoli. Other than that, I've just pinned many, many more ideas to pursue "some" day.

12. Get healthier. yes. Lost some weight in the process. Certainly not "done" with this goal though.

13. For some reason, luck #13 - make myself priority 1 - always take a bit of a beating. Slow steps.

Having gone through the list, I'm surprised and pleased at how much more I have accomplished than I gave myself credit for. It's been a hectic year, but well spent.

One more month to go (okay, one and a half). I intend to get more blog posts up, so keep an eye out :)

Crafty Projects: DIY Solutions

2013-08-11T11:27:00.000-04:00

The bedroom needed some TLC this weekend, and since I was in the mood, I started rearranging furniture and reorganizing everything that caught my eye.

As I dug through my half-forgotten to-do bits of projects that were scattered around the room, I was "inspired" to finally sort through what was doable and what could be shelved indefinitely.

Can you guess what sort of crafty things I might be up to with these things? ;)

Hopefully this will break me out of my work and school rut and get the creativity flowing again ;)

So, what are you guesses? Your ideas just might spark a new project :D

10+ Blog Post Ideas for the Busy Bee

2013-07-05T15:06:00.001-04:00

Can you believe half a year has finished? Where did 2013 go!? And what happened to summer? Thankfully I'm usually indoors courtesy internship, so I've missed most of the shit weather. But would it kill the weather gods to give us a sunny day or two?

Since I can't seen to find the time to finish a blog post (I've got 7 in various draft stages), I'll just give you a list of posts you can expect in the second half of 2013. You can let me know what you're really looking forward to reading about or suggest other post ideas.

1. Internship experience and Johari Window
2. Recommend people from _____? (insert category)
3. Clothes haul
4. Respond to madame noir article (first verify)
5. List 10 writing prompts
6. The benefits of workshopping
7. My writing "process"
8. Review an ipsy product
9. Finish "writer/label" post
10. Finish/post $ store decorating post
11. Finish/post "handy resources" post
12. My beauty/skin care routine
13. Bubble bath post
14. $ store craft ideas
15. My dream shoe at a dream cost
16. This to that

I do love my lists ;)

My Summer Days 2013

2013-06-20T17:46:00.000-04:00

My holidays somehow end up being busier than regular "working" semesters. Go figure.

I had just about one free week, and then all this started:

1) Two online classes - both four weeks long, both reading intensive. Past experience with summer classes did not prepare me for this!

2) Summer internship - Unpaid summer internship. My last internship was more work oriented, but it was a paid internship. Since this is for college credit, so far it's been more classes and more READING!

This is not the sort of reading I had planned on doing this summer. At least I get college credit at the end of it all (hopefully) ...?

3) Freelance writing job - (thank you craigslist.) I get to interview local business people and do write-ups. My first article just published ... SUPER excited to join a family history of published writing.

Life has a funny way of coming full circle. When I'd started majoring in English I'd been warned to avoid journalism because it was not lucrative or glamorous. Well, this isn't glamorous, but it's my only source of money for the time being.

There are other things that keep me busy. Searching for, applying for, and praying for another (unpaid!) internship for the fall. This will be a guaranteed 3 credits towards my major. All this unpaid business ... I'm consoling myself with a) I'll be learning new skills and exploring something new b) It'll be a good experience to put on the resume and c) The networking possibilities are fantastic. Somewhere between 8 hours of internship, 6 hours of class work, 6 hours of sleep, 2 hours of getting ready/eating/taking a breath, I'm squeezing in chores like sorting through years worth of memories and junk in order to clear up space in the house, contacting people for regular communications, showering, searching for a real paying job, reading for pleasure, blogging, establishing a professional net-presence, catching up on shows/youtube, learning new things, and spending quality time with the family. (If you do the math, the last litany of things is accomplished in a 2 hour window.)

Plans Are For Amateurs

What I'd intended to do this summer:

1) Get through my mom's recipe diary - it's got well over 100 recipes and I wanted to make as many as possible.

2) Try a new recipe a week from the myriad of cookbooks we've collected over the years, but never actually used.

3) Read. Specifically, FREE read things that have been sitting on my to-read and to-re-read list for ages!

4) Take up a photo-project.

5) Digitize all the old print photos.

6) Clean and organize various parts of the house because they need an overhaul.

7) Write! I really wanted to get into the habit of writing on a daily basis, but I'm lucky if I catch a proper sleep on a daily basis.

8) Pick up a new skill/learn something new. This will happen by the way at the internship, but I'd been thinking of something a little less work-oriented.

9) Paint ... I'd finally gotten some surge of inspiration. Now I have a muse running lose in my head and no time to let her express herself on canvas.

10) Travel. This would have been a great time to do a family trip, but now even the weekends are booked with papers for these stupid classes.

What's that saying? We plan and God laughs...

Revlon Lip Butter Review - Loving it!

2013-06-11T23:55:00.001-04:00

I blame MissBudgetBeauty (in the best of ways) for the following:

Also, I lucked out on a killer sale at CVS a couple of weeks back. Don't know why the Revlon Lip Butters were marked down by 75%, but I'm not one to question a good deal.

Yes, I'm late to the party. I haven't been a big lipstick person. I've always preferred lip glosses, but the latest trend of sticky lip glosses has had me searching for alternatives.

At $2.12 I said why the heck not to the Revlon Lip Butters. These had received good reviews from people I trust and I'd been wanting to try one out for some time. Well one became eight because I couldn't decide on a color. Oodles of swatches online, including a mega swatch here.

In current rotation are Peach Parfait and Sugar Plum. I stuck to my safe palette and am already regretting I didn't include something more daring like Lollipop.

I like that it goes on smooth and starts off a bit sheer, playing up my natural color. 1-2 coats is almost like a stain, but they are buildable so you can get really good pigmentation. I've stayed away from lipsticks because they tend to be drying or wear off really fast, but I haven't had either of those problems with the Lip Butters. In fact, if anything, they have worked like a balm on my lips, leaving me softer even on days I don't use them.

The only negative I have for this is the tube design. The base to cap ratio is 10% to 90% and that makes getting the cap off a little tricky. After the first couple of times you get the hang of it and the cap pops off easy (and clicks back into place securely). But the design might have been better balanced at 25% to 75%. Anyway, it's a minor thing, considering the actual product is really good.

If $8 works for you, or you find Lip Butters on sale, I'd say definitely snag one (2, 3, 4...).

Thank you Mikhila!

2013 Check In #2

2013-04-22T19:15:00.000-04:00

*waves* Hi there!

You had a burst of updates from me in the beginning of April, so I don't feel too badly about having skived off since. Don't mind the slew of product reviews, but since Influenster did send them to me for free, because I'm socially active, it was my duty to oblige. I hope somebody out there read them and got something out of it. I'm still completely loving Olay's Fresh Effects system - wakes me up in the morning with a lovely massage.

Since I'm completing an English major, "keep up with reading" has been a cinch! I'm taking a sci-fi English class and just re-read Hunger Games. Re-loved it! I've self-imposed a library-ban so I don't get distracted by Catching Fire and Mockingjay. The next three weeks are going to be looooong!

Photo challenges are on hold. I was going to do a winter into spring into summer kind of thing, but the weather was crappy up until last week, then overnight we fell into spring. Go figure! I'm planning on doing a portrait series over the summer. My cousin's getting married, so maybe I'll do a "little moments" kind of challenge/series as well. Any other ideas?

"Get a job" is in progress. Anyone? Anything? I really want to get some experience in the PR/Publishing/Editing fields to see what's a good fit. Or get a state job, because I'm about age out of my mom's health insurance. Eeks!

Does rediscovering writing count? Or writing a sci-fi piece, because it'd be my first. We're done with 1/3 of the year (yes, gasp!), so I'm holding out hope for the remaining 2/3.

I'm getting better at dealing with PersonX, but it gets tricky every now and then. Relationships are complicated and messy. Pity complete avoidance isn't an option.

I don't see myself moving to Atlanta, since I'm working on graduating in December 2013, but hopefully a vacation with Mishal happens. It has to! The question is, when?

I'm being utter crap at getting back in touch with Caitlin. I've tried, but could have tried harder. Shame on me!

Helping Mom is happening, as is getting healthier and making myself priority. Now for that craft project...I first need to sort out my crafts boxes. Is a mess!

Meanwhile, the Jar O' Good Stuff and the To-Do/Memory Board have both filled up more since the first of the year:

In news that doesn't quite fit into resolutions update: I'm participating in TWO Research Conferences. It's the same sci-fi piece for both, but I haven't done something like this since 10th grade, so the experience and exposure will be great. Now, here's hoping my piece is substantial if not good (great might be asking for too much of a WIP). Squee/oh shit!

Not Your Mother's Hair...

2013-04-05T15:56:00.000-04:00

...except that the whole teased, textured style was definite in through the 80s and early 90s. Looks like bigger is better, again. Good thing my hair is naturally frizzy ;)

Influenster sent me a SweetHeart VoxBox (so sweet!) and in it was a Not Your Mother's product. I'm not big on putting too many chemicals and such in my hair, so it was nice to see something where the first couple of ingredients are pronounceable everyday things.

Courtesy soap.com

I didn't know what to expect. I was worried the salt would dry out my hair. I've used it a few times now (not daily), and can happily report no drying of hair. I have naturally curly hair so the waves don't actually show. BUT this is the first product that has left my hair frizz-free all day and hasn't made it CRUNCHY! Phew! So, instead, I have pretty, soft curls that I can actually leave open (more like half-pin since I'm not used to having my hair down haha).

sorry for the out-of-focusness

At only $5 at walmart, I would definitely repurchase this. HUGE thanks to Influenster for bringing this brand to my attention. Even at the trial size, there's a lot of product (oh yeah, you don't need to spray a whole lot for it to work), so I get to try it for a good amount instead of just once like when you get samples from other places. Sweet deal!

a bit leaked in the box, but still plenty to use and try out

Side note: The brand is huge. They've got a vast variety of products, something for all hair types and needs. At $5 I think they're definitely worth checking out.

"I received these products complimentary from Influenster for testing purposes."

I glisten..kinda

2013-04-05T09:44:00.002-04:00

Because women supposedly don't ever sweat. Well, clearly enough women sweat a whole lot that Secret went and made Clinical Strength Stress Sweat Protection.

Courtesy Pinterest and someecards

I'm not going to gross you out by talking about sweating. I'll just do a quick product review and recommend you try it out yourself to see if it works for you (because everyone's body chemistry is different, etc. etc.)

It goes on smooth, has a pleasant smell (serene citrus, though there are other options) and is REALLY good at keeping you dry. Those are the three things I look for in a deodorant, so points to Secret for each of those. Other brand deodorants, including other Secret products, do a good enough job neutralizing odors and keeping the sweat to a minimum.

The Stress Sweat Protection, though, is like a Tony Stark-grade deodorant. This baby will keep you dry and fresh all day long (maybe not all day at the gym though). Yes, it's still cold out, so how can I really claim that. But see some of the buildings I go to classes in keep it super hot, and I glisten a whole lot. It's also useful against a stressful gym session - once in a while there's a non-stressful gym session. Go figure. So yeah, I've had opportunity to sweat it out.

My own...hence the sub-par quality.

If you're someone who needs to change her shirt after a trip down the driveway to get your mail ... you might want to see a doctor. In the meantime, this is worth trying out.

The only con I have for this deodorant is it's price. It costs something like $8, which is high for a store deodorant. But keep in mind it's prescription strength, so it's worth it. Of course, I'd never have picked it up myself, so thank you Influenster for sending it to me to try out. But I really think it's very helpful for my fellow "glistening" ladies (okay, fine. We have a sweating problem, in that we could sweat in an air-conditioned room).

Courtesy Google and Sunday Comics Debt

"I received these products complimentary from Influenster for testing purposes."

Inner skinny girl: Sorry, but no thanks.

2013-04-02T00:14:00.000-04:00

The SkinnyGirl Daily On-the-Go Greek Yogurt and Blueberry Bar didn't do it for me. If you've ever had any Nutrisystem food, it tasted sort of like that. I think whatever they use as substitute for gluten to make it healthier is programmed to come out tasting like cardboard, which is where health foods lose me.

I'm down for making better choices and eating healthier, but at least make it taste good. I'm doing the gluten-free thing (more on that later), but haven't tried any of the gluten-free bread or pasta stuff. After trying the On-the-Go Bar, I'm not so keen.

On the positive side, the Greek yogurt and blueberry (honest to goodness, real blueberries!) bit was good. If they can up the appeal for the base, SkinnyGirl's got a fantastic product.

I will say, it was good to have the bar on hand. I happened to have it on a day when I was actually "on-the-go" and it helped quiet my growling tummy. None of it got sticky or messy, despite having made its way to the bottom of my backpack.

So, over all, points for concept, convenience and real blueberries (this, coming from a girl who doesn't like blueberries), but it's not something I would buy at the store because of the taste, "cardboard" and price factors.

"I received these products complimentary from Influenster for testing purposes."

Va-Va-WOW!!!

2013-03-23T01:20:00.000-04:00

I'd like you to meet my new best friend, the Olay Fresh Effects Va-Va-Vivid system.

It's really va-va-WOW!

It's a portable mini-massager-cum-cleanser for your face. I always feel refreshed and awake after using this, even without the accompanying Shine Shine Go Away Cleanser.

My skin feels softer, lighter, tighter and smoother after one use - all excellent reasons for making this part of the daily routine. I like that I can use it with other face washes as well. Or, just with a bit of water for a wake-me-up massage.

Here's what makes it a stand out product:

1) It's compact and light, therefore portable. It's roughly the size of a disposable razor, though a negligible bit bulkier. Heck, it made it into my travel kit within a week of receiving it.
2) It works off 1 AAA battery (first one comes pre-loaded), which minimizes the need for multiple charging accessories.
3) It's not harsh. The rubber tips are gentle, do not irritate the skin, and provide a firm massage & cleaning.
4) Easy maintenance - again, it's basically rubber and plastic, so this pocket-sized powerhouse is easy to clean and use.

Verdict: Buy it! I was lucky enough to get this in a Influenster VoxBox. Now that I've tried it out (and had the rest of my family try it out), I can say this is something I would definitely spend $15 on. In fact, I've got my sister asking for one, and she's not super into beauty maintenance routines. In case mine ever dies, it's one of those things I would re-purchase, and I don't say that about many products. The Fresh Effects system isn't a gimmick, it really is that awesome.

(ps - for the few reviewers who've noticed an increase in breakouts, keep in mind everyone reacts differently to different products. Try the va-va-Vivid with your regular face wash and see if that makes a difference)

"I received these products complimentary from Influenster for testing purposes."

Sweetheart VoxBox Pre-Review

2013-03-03T23:22:00.000-05:00

'Free' is one of my favorite words, and Influenster delivers. Influenster gives me a chance to "try the latest and coolest products catered towards [my] lifestyle", in exchange for giving reviews and getting other people to take notice of these products. Sounds fair to me.

When I got the email that I'd been selected to receive a VoxBox (finally!!!) I literally squeed.

*squee* Finally getting an @influenster #voxbox - the valentine edition. SUPER excited! #happydance
— Simi Sinha (@SimTara) February 15, 2013

Waiting for my box to come in was agony. A white box was sitting on my porch on Feb 26. At first I thought it was something for my dad, but then I picked it up and saw a pink heart sticker.

Look at all the goodies I got inside.

The Secret Clinical Strength deodorant is timely, since I'm about to run out. At 1.6oz, it's one of their regular sizes (not the bitty, travel size). I will use and review soon-ish, so watch this space for a link to the review.

I'm a little iffy about the Not Your Mother's 'beach babe' spray. My hair is naturally curly and dry, plus this weather is killing my scalp health, so I'm not sure how smart it will be to put salty water in. I know getting in the ocean water hasn't been good, and I'm assuming the spray will react the same. Anyone have any feedback? If you've used this/something like it, let me know. Now that my hair has finally grown out to all natural (I had chemically relaxed it), I'll give it a go in the spring season and review.

Unfortunately, this bottle leaked a bit into my box. See:

Fortunately, it seems to have stopped leaking, so I'll have enough to actually try out.

I'm REALLY looking forward to trying out the Olay Fresh Effects Va-Va-Vivid cleansing system, but anything that helps exfoliate and cleanse my face is awesome. Especially in this crappy, drying winter. Is it spring yet? I haven't actually gotten around to using it, so hopefully that'll happen some time this week. *fingers crossed*

Aaand lastly, I was excited to get a Skinny Girl On-The-Go bar, because I like the concept of the brand and I've liked what little of Bethenny I've seen on TV. I've tried it. Let's just say, it's a healthy bar. I'll post a full review soon.

Right, well. That was my box. Free stuff, all basically full size. For the record, here's the disclaimer: "I've received these products complimentary from Influenster for testing purposes." Which is basically what I said in the beginning, but I don't want to end up in trouble, so there you have it.

If you're active online and will recommend products if you like them, you should definitely request an Influenster membership (only open in North America). Have questions? I may have answers. Or I'll be able to point you in the right direction at the very least.

Ta!

The Best Books!

2013-02-28T13:02:00.002-05:00

Books specifically. Here's a list of books I grew up reading and think every kid should read.

1. The Giver
2. Number the Stars
3. The Phantom Tollbooth
4. The BFG
5. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
6. The Boxcar Children (series)
7. Little Women
8. Eight Cousins
9. Rose in Bloom (sequel to Eight Cousins)
10. A Little Princess
11. Hatchet
12. Constance
14. A Wrinkle in Time
15. Fahrenheit 451
16. Mountains Beyond Mountains
17. Charlotte's Web

The top three are, in fact, my absolute favorite. The rest is a non-preferential ordering.

It shocks me when I come across people - not just kids - who haven't even heard of some of these books, let alone read them.

I plan to re-read my way through this list (barring the Boxcar Children books) and post reviews, so watch out for updates every now and then.

What are your favorite books? Do you have any "staple" childhood books that you would have your kids read?

eta: post title is changed because I'll be putting up another post with the same title and don't want to create confusion.

Have you heard the story about the Donkey the Father and the Son?

2013-02-24T00:25:00.000-05:00

The short version: a father and son have a donkey and all three go from town to town. In each town they are criticized for the way they are traveling, whether it's the father on the donkey and the son leading, or the donkey tied to a stick and both father and son carrying it between them. (The expanded version)

To paraphrase the moral: you can't please everyone. But don't let this become your problem.

People are going to have opinions. Some will love everything you do. Some will hate everything you do. If they are sane, they'll react in moderation. Praise is nice and non-constructive criticism sucks.

None of this should matter, but of course it does. It's taken me forever and then some to realize I just can't take it all to heart. That kind of habit is destructive; it only breeds lots of self-doubt and in an effort to make everyone else happy, you end up displeasing yourself the most.

Bottom line. It's just not possible to do the "right thing" by everyone, and when you run around trying to do just that, you end up looking like the poor donkey in the story: never had a say, was contorted in all sorts of ways.

via Wikipedia

Without getting preachy now... do what you want to do, because it makes you happy and it works for you. If it bothers someone, it's his/her problem. If it really bothers someone, it might indicate that they don't really have your best interest at heart. Those who really matter and understand you will accept that it's what's good for you and leave you be.

Does that make me a selfish person? Not really. If I'm happy, I'm a better version of myself, and so a better person for/to others. I used to spend so much time and energy trying to please everyone and it didn't actually work out. Now that I focus on myself, life runs more smoothly. If it bothers some people, maybe they are the ones being selfish?

What do you think? Do you tend to feel like the father? The son? The donkey? Whose expectations are more important, your own or others?

ps - Thanks to @msbudgetbeauty for reminding me of this story and, in turn, inspiring this post.

2013 Check In #1

2013-02-17T23:57:00.002-05:00

Life is hectic. I had forgotten how demanding undergrad was. Or maybe it's the years that have changed my perspective and priorities. It's out of the house from 7am to 5pm, back in just long enough for tea, then gym, them home for shower & dinner & barely enough time to do readings and homework (woah! I really didn't think I'd be doing homework at this stage in my life). Somewhere in there I manage to squeeze in sleep. Weekends are left for taking care of the house, catching up on school stuff and trying to keep up with an online course I'm taking.

Not sure what possessed me to join an online course, but I couldn't pass up on something called Learning Creative Learning, especially when it was free. It's a MOOC (massive open online course) offered by MIT via p2pu... and this is all very new to me, so I'm completely geeking out over the new words and concepts ;) That should neatly cover Resolution #5 - to learn a new skill.

School takes care of #2 - keeping up with reading. The rest of my 2013 resolutions are all giant WIPs, much like the household DIYs I've got lined up. We'll get into that later. Maybe. If I make any progress at any rate.

I've got a few reviews coming your way. Hopefully I'll get them written up & posted more frequently than this last post took to get out. That just goes to show, I'm that tied up with "life". Lately, my idea of taking a break involves cleaning a room in the house or learning some new housekeeping trick. I'm growing OLD! REALLY need to get to #7 - take a vacation with Mishal - ASAP!

ps - I just had to watch Forbidden Planet for a class. I don't think this kind of sci-fi is my cup of tea, which is too bad since I'm taking an entire class on SF writing (not the class I had to watch this movie for... the Gods are laughing). On the other hand, Hunger Games is on the reading list, so it can't be all that bad ;)

I'll leave you with my current motto in life ... really trying to live by these words:

1 Year Anniv with iDoneThis

2013-01-20T11:00:00.000-05:00

It's my one year anniversary with iDoneThis. *does happy dance*

(I mentioned them last year in my 10 Tweeps You Should Follow post ... and they'll always be on that list!)

My buzzwords since last year have been accountability and self-improvement. Considering my always long lists of resolutions (2012 and 2013), iDoneThis is a particularly handy app: I get an email every night at 8pm asking me to "take 30 seconds to write out what [I] got done today."

(You can, of course, tweak it so the reminder comes at any other time of day you prefer.)

And see, iDoneGood!

Ok so I fell off the grid for a bit from end May to beginning October, but picked it back up when Ginni - the Chief Happiness Officer - reached out to me via email to check in. How cool is that!? I don't know about you, but gestures like that really make me love a company.

So I don't know whether to call this a cheat, a side benefit or just abuse of an opportunity available to me, but I also use my iDoneThis updates as mini-journal logs. I like to journal and would love to do more of it in general, but most days I either forget or am too tired/lazy. When iDoneThis asks me what I got done, I take it as an opportunity to jot notes of the significant and trivial bits, creating a weird collage of moments. Some of these jots are elaborated into proper journal entries, but some just stay as little sticky-note reminders of life.

Anyway, I haven't missed a day since October 2, 2012 (woah! My brain remembers that it's Gandhi's birthday...absolutely bloody useless information unless I'm ever on Jeapordy). I have the best intentions to not miss a day again ... but no promises.

Thanks for keeping me on track with my goals and helping me hold on to random memories iDoneThis!!!

To those reading: try iDoneThis out for a week and tell me what you think. It's free and good for you, so you have no excuse ;)