Ramblings of a Fool for Life

Perception

2015-05-30T03:04:00.001+02:00

She wore her fuck-me boots; her slut red lip stick; the top that got the cleavage compliments; and the bootylicious jeans. So, why did she feel like Porky Pig and the ugly duckling all rolled into one?

Self-Employment: The What, Why and Who

2014-05-24T19:38:00.000+03:00

Feature article for ProfileTree.com

Self-employment: a concept that is at once both exhilarating and scary. A bit like bungee jumping –you know you are well-harnessed, but for a long time you are free falling, and at some point you cannot help wondering if your rope will hold.

But what is self-employment? What is good about it and bad about it? Who should consider it and who should steer clear?

The What of Self-Employment

In the simplest terms, a self-employed person is someone who works for him or herself, as opposed to being under someone else’s employ for regular payment. In that sense a business owner is not necessarily self-employed if they are not concerned with the day-to-day operations of the company/business they own. A self-employed person would own a business, and would be the primary or sole operator of that business. In legal or technical terms a business would possibly be: Sole Proprietorship, a Partnership, or a Limited Liability Company (LLC).

However, owning and running a company is not the only way to become self-employed. There is also home-based Internet business or e-commerce, as well as freelance work, and consultancy, in a multitude of fields.

The Why (and Why Not) of Self-Employment

Like anything in the world, self-employment has things going for it, and others against it.

On the plus side:

1. You Are Your Own Boss

You now have the chance to set your own rules. You can do things the way you want them, when you want them. You make the choices, develop the structure, and set the values. They are your fingerprints that are leaving their imprint.

2. Life is More Flexible

You set your own work hours and your own pace. You also have the freedom to pick and choose what you want to work on, and develop.

3. No One Breathing Down Your Neck

Farewell to micro-management.

A thing of the past is the notion that the boss having a bad day will inevitably (read: unfairly) affect you.

4. You Get Off the Ferris Wheel

You do not feel like a drone in a rat race, struggling to meet a pre-determined ideal of productivity that might not be particularly satisfying. As is the unfortunate case with many corporate people, your job is no longer built around the mindless filling of work hours for the sake of having something to do and then collecting payment at the end of the determined period, but rather built on doing meaningful work.

5. What You Put in You Get Out

Your professional life becomes about what you decide to focus on, and provided you are in the right profession (based on a proper market study and a deep understanding of your skills) it flourishes in direct proportion to how much energy, time, and creativity you put in.

There is also the added bonus of the fact that no one takes credit for your work (but of course no one is there to cover your shortcomings). In short, your true value shows.

6. No More Office Politics

Those landmines of how the office really operated that always had you walking on eggshells will no longer waste your time or energy. In addition, you can finally put behind your black-hole peers and superiors who suck you into their drama, and leech on your work and creative energy.

7. Quality-Based Work Instead of Quantity-Based Work

Becoming successful at what you do will not be evaluated based on unrealistic quotas that you must meet to get paid, or on an unreasonable bulk of deliverables, or harsh Key Performance Indicators that seem to forgo self-fulfillment and self-growth. If handled properly, and while you are indeed working hard, maybe even harder than when you worked for someone else, you can become truly productive, and still get the chance to enjoy what you do, even when you are under the gun, which realistically speaking, most of the time you will be as a business owner, or an independent contractor.

However on the minus side of self-employment, one can find:

1. You Are Your Own Boss

No, this is not a typographical error, and yes being the decision-maker is the most appealing point about being self-employed. But, that kind of responsibility can very easily overwhelm you, and possibly drown you.

Since you are the first and last line of defense, you are the main person (or a lot of the time the only person) in charge of putting out proverbial fires, like for instance: dealing with demanding or unsatisfied clients, and making sure that no creditors will come knock your walls down because of late/unmet payments.

One of the downsides of being your own boss is the possibility of getting sidetracked, or lost altogether, if you are not a self-starter, because you do not have a superior to watch your performance and deliverables. You cannot fall back on the fact that there is someone to keep you on track when necessary.

A key task for someone in charge of a growing business (and even more so if you were a freelance professional) would be the need to market yourself, which some people do not like to do, or do not know how to do effectively.

2. Stable/Regular Income Not Guaranteed (Most of the Time)

Financially speaking, the good and the bad of self-employment it is that you get paid based on your work. However, it is important to keep in mind that meeting, fairly, the value of your input with the value of your total imbursement for this input is tricky, more so at the beginning of your venture. Even if you do reach a satisfactory formula, it might still take you a while to break even and become a self-sufficient business, or a comfortable independent professional, without needing the odd part-time job to help sustain you.

3. Everything Comes Out of Your Own Pocket

You pay directly for whatever you need to further your business, such as training, or graduate degrees and diplomas, as well as benefits for your wellbeing (and that of whoever might work for you), such as holidays, sick days, and pension plans.

4. Lack of Structured Time

Flexibility can, and usually does, mean a lack of structured time, as well as long hours –especially at the beginning.

Work can infringe on your personal time, since you might not have clear breaks in the form of strict work hours, or a specific work place outside of your home, or a dedicated workspace in your home, if you work out of where you live. This infringement is very hard to avoid while starting your business, or establishing a name for yourself as an independent professional. If you are not careful, once you are established, this diffused structure might have become a part of your lifestyle that you are unable to work any other way.

5. If You Do Not Do it, it Does Not Get Done

One of the cornerstones of being self-employed is being able to multi-task, since it is the easiest way to cut costs; and even if that is not the motive, you might not want anyone else doing things other than your way, since that is one of the reasons you started this venture in the first place.

Of course, multi-tasking means stress and long hours. At short bursts that is manageable, but it is not healthy as a way of handling business on a regular basis, without proper breaks and delegation of responsibilities.

6. Can Get Boring Being Alone Sometimes

You do not have office politics to contend with, but you also do not have people to goof around with.

Reviewing the advantages and disadvantages of self-employment you probably felt that certain pros could be the flip side of certain cons, or vise versa –that is because they are. Depending on one’s perspective, one point can either be a positive or a negative.

The Who (and Who Not) of Self-Employment

Of course, anyone can go into business, or decide to freelance, but having certain characteristics means that some people are more predisposed to take the leap, and are better suited for it, while other characteristics might mean that you will have more of a difficult time in this undergoing.

A good starting point is having a marathon runner attitude, in that you have long-term stamina, you keep your eye on the prize, are tenacious, and in it for the long haul.

Also, if you like, or even prefer, dancing to your own tune, then you have the uniqueness, confidence and creativity to go it alone.

In addition, the following character traits, which are part of the skill set of a leader, have proven to be quite helpful when it comes to self-employment.

1. Flexible

You might begin your day with one plan in mind, and through a series of circumstances end up doing something entirely different –that breakfast meeting might now become a dinner, even get pushed to a different day. Or perhaps, the writer you hired needs more time, or you are unhappy with the work handed in, and have to tweak it yourself.

Flexible also means that you are quick enough to realize when your work strategy needs modifying or changing completely, and that that might need to happen quite often given the current market situation, if not throughout your business life then at least at the beginning.

If you are truly flexible then you will rarely, if ever, get angry when things do not go as planned.

2. Focused

You are able to set proper goals and achieve them. You are interested in new and creative ventures and ideas, because it is after all how you ended up self-employed (or at least contemplating it), but not every shiny new thing can distract you easily. You know where you want to go, and you know how to get there.

3. Takes Initiative

One of the fundamental differences between a leader and a manager is the ability to take charge and not wait to be told what to do, all without being obtrusive –which is a very delicate recipe to master. This requires a solid vision, and clarity of mind, even if most of the time it is being overloaded with bills, deadlines, and the kids’ soccer practice.

4. Able to Take Timely, and Tough Decisions

If you do not decide, and take action, at the right time then it is worthless… if not damaging. You also have to be able to make peace with the fact that putting on the decider hat might not make you everyone’s favorite person, and that with every decision made there is a lost opportunity, and the tougher the decision, the bigger the lost opportunity.

5. Confident

As obvious as that sounds, it still seems to fall between the cracks.

6. Takes ownership

You have no problem being responsible and held accountable.

7. Has Networking Abilities

You need to know how to grow your business, how to approach people and get what you need.

8. Works Quickly and Under Pressure

Many people suffer from a lack of sound judgment during stressful situations, and their minds involuntarily freeze. A leader would be able to catch him or her self in that situation and work it out without compromising their work.

However, it might not be the right cup of tea for people who need hierarchy and an established sense of belonging, as well as an unchanging and preset structure.

People who need teamwork to thrive, and do not like multi-tasking might also not be the right fit.

Likewise, people who need financial security, in the sense that they will get set wages/salary at regular intervals, should not pursue self-employment. Although it might be said that at this day and age no one job, whether being someone’s fulltime employee, or being self-employed, can offer real financial stability in such a turbulent financial world.

Conclusion

After all the research and the tallying of other’s experiences in the self-employment and corporate-employment domains, the determining factors would probably have to be: what you are looking for; what you can live with, and live without; as well as, what your true capabilities and deficiencies are.

In the end, you have to realize that one controls one’s actions, but not the results.

Egypt: Clothed in Nothings

2012-07-07T22:43:00.000+02:00

(Published in the July/August 2012 issue of What Women Want)

Your physical appearance is your ambassador: it says a lot about you. One of those things though is not whether you are “better” or “worse” than anyone else.

Contrary to what you might believe, there is no such thing as deciding the “better-ness” of any one human being over another, and even if, for the sake of argument, we acknowledge the twisted need of some people for establishing a ranking system, then it should not be determined by something as trivial as your fashion sense. Yes, how one looks is a strong factor in determining who they are. But their value, their identity, should be more comprehensive and include things like what they stand for, their ethos, and how they interact with you. Believing in such exclusionary concepts is elitist, narrow-minded, xenophobic, and utterly silly.

No, I am not going to sugarcoat it.

With everything that is going on, are you really going to focus on the “classiness “ (according to you) of an –at the time- potential fist lady, and overlook (whether deliberately or blindly) the fact that we have been chasing our tails for the past seventeen months, and counting, under the pretext of “building a democratic state”? Would you really rather delude yourselves, that whether you like it or not, she is in fact a very accurate representation of the majority of Egyptian females nowadays?

If you absolutely must be concerned with anything, although you might have first considered waiting until her husband was actually in office, then concern yourself with what her ideals are (not what you think they are based on what she wears). This outpour is nothing but a painful show of how heavily marinated we are in a xenophobic swamp of pettiness and selfishness.

Of course, there are appearance and protocol criteria for public office, and more so for diplomatic ones, and they are tougher the higher you get up the food chain, but that is not what the mockers were evaluating, they were mostly in some feigned culture shock from the supposed tackiness, and even if they were not, all necessary appearance and protocol issues will be remedied in due time. Look up old, pre-office, photos of Hosni and Suzanne Mubarak. What people seem to forget (or maybe not know) is that diplomatic, and critical public positions are thoroughly vetted right from the start to assure potential and compatibility. Candidates are also trained “on the job” as they climb up the public office ladder, and are later on coached by an army of professionals on everything from which side to part your hair on, all the way to how to enunciate your speeches, because it takes a fully-loaded village to mold a high-ranking public figure into the final product that you see. Alas, we do not have this public figure-building machine. So do not expect the impossible. Not only have the Morsis not been appropriately exposed to public life before, they have not gone through the grinder that is political life. Do yourself a favor and stop expecting to take a baked cake out of the oven when you have not put one in to begin with.

Part of frowning upon people who are different from you has to do with comfort zones: it is easier to be only around what you know and understand; it is also boring and not enriching. Another reason for not accepting the other is the ridiculous notion that either one or the other is correct. Life is too fluid for the belief of there always being one, and only one, way to do things.

Open-mindedness is not exclusive to whoever falls in line with your preconceived, and pre-approved, notions. Acceptance should be afforded to everyone, including people you do not agree with. This is essential for the well-coordinated society that we want to finally live in filled with freedom, democracy, acceptance, respect and all the other enlightened ideals we are preaching.

I refuse to think that after all we have been through, and will still face, we still do not give things their proper weight and context. We should know better by now than to continue with the two-dimensional stereotypes: not all women in niqab are scary black tents out to get you; not all veiled females or bearded men have an iron curtain covering their brains, just like not all cleavages are there to lead you into temptation.

Never assume. Acknowledge the indicators, but give yourself the chance to get to know the other… without judgment. We are not living in a super hero comic where the character wears their identity in a costume. I ask you: how is your looking down at Mrs. Morsi’s clothes of choice any different from a fundamentalist’s scorn of what you believe is your right to wear a swimsuit?

بين التمثيل المشرف وأنصاف الحلول

2012-06-21T01:00:00.000+02:00

مبدأي التمثيل المشرف وشرف المحاولة قاما بتخريب مفهوم مستوى الجودة لدينا، لأننا أصبحنا "نرضى بقليلنا" في كل شئ "عشان المراكب تمشي". ولكن إذا المركب معيب فهي ستبحر لبعض الوقت ولن تكون الرحلة مريحة على الإطلاق، وإن آجلا أو عاجلا سوف تغرق وتغرقك معها.

يجب أن تعلم أنه من حقك كإنسان وكمصري أن تبحر في مركب تليق بمقامك، وإن لم توجد المركب ذات المواصفات التي تريدها فمن حقك أن ترفض الاختيارات المتاحة -مهما كثرت- طالما أنت على دراية صحيحة بمعطيات الأمور وبحقوقك فلا تخشى لومة لاذم أو "إنك هتوقف المراكب السايرة"

لا تنساق وراء الوضع القائم ولا ترضى بالأمر الواقع على حساب هدفك الأوَّلي حتى ينتهي بك الأمر بالانحراف الشديد عن مسارك المراد.

تذكر أهدافك وأمانيك في بداية الثورة وقارنها بالوضع الحالي وبموقفك الآن. هل ضميرك مرتاح لنتيجة المقارنة؟

كفانا أنصاف الحلول.

أصول اللعب

2012-06-20T16:01:00.000+02:00

على من رضي أن يلعب لعبة وقبل الشروط والقواعد المفروضة من الطرف الآخر رغم المغالطات الفادحة -على من قبل، سواء بوعي تام أو بتسرُّع أو بسذاجة أو عدم إدراك لمعطيات الأمور أن يتحمل عواقب قراراته وألا يسعى لأن عواقب أن "يهد المعبد عليه وعلى أعدائه" وخيمة على الجميع. تعامل مع الواقع "ومترفَّصش زي العيال".

مصالحة بين الحياة اليومية ومبادئ المدى البعيد

2012-06-12T16:03:00.000+02:00

لا يمكن إنكار أن متطلبات الحياة اليومية تملي إرادتها على مبادئ وقيم وأهداف المدى البعيد، فلا يمكن مثلا النظر للصالح العام ووضع أساسات صحيحة وقوية للأجيال المقبلة وقوت يومك مهدد. ولكن يجب أن تكون على يقين أنك لن تستطيع أن تحقق أمن وثبات حقيقي لك ولأسرتك اليوم وغدا والأسبوع القادم وحقوقك الأساسية وآدميتك تحت تهديد دائم.

The Right to Your Right

2012-01-08T01:30:00.000+02:00

We live in times that instantly filter people based on their actions. Times so impartial and unrelenting that they reflect to you in uncompromising honesty, your actions and their consequences, while also taking pictures for everyone else to see. So, where do you stand? And, what do you see? Do you realize that there is nowhere to hide from the truth? There is nowhere to hide from your self?

In these interesting phases, when history is made, where the smallest action can bring down an empire, you should ask yourself: what do you want to be remembered by? How do you want people to see you? Are your actions and moral positions consistently validating the image of yourself you wish to perpetuate? Is your logic sound? Are you positive of what you believe? Is your conscience clear? And most importantly: How do you want to remember yourself? Will you be proud of yourself?

We can disagree on many subjective issues, such as: politics, priorities, even religion (yes, most of our interpretations are subjective –but we can go into that debate some other time), however, there are certain irrefutable, and indisputable facts that cannot be debated, and that trump anything else in importance and priority; things like:

1. The human factor, which is the most important, and the most valuable factor in any given situation, and I really do mean in absolutely any given situation.

2. Basic human rights, such as: proper food, proper shelter, dignity, and humane treatment are, and should continue to be, available to ANYONE, ANYTIME, ANYWHERE, and NO MATTER WHAT. These rights are also non-negotiable and non-revocable, again, no matter what.

3. The weaker party has more rights than the stronger party, and the stronger party is expected to show more restraint and composure. This is the duty and responsibility that goes with the privilege of being stronger. You see, privileges and duties are like the two blades of a pair of scissors –you cannot cut with one blade without the other, they need to work simultaneously.

Now, let’s compare importance:

Stability vs. Human Rights,

Economy vs. Human Rights,

Politics vs. Human Rights,

any Civil Servant or Civil Service Entity vs. Human Rights.

You know what, Human Rights win. Every time.

Still not convinced? Let’s try it again.

“I’ve got an election to run” vs. “There are Egyptian Citizens being beaten and dragged down the streets of Cairo”;

“The Stock Market is down X%” vs. “There are Egyptian civilians being beaten and dragged down the streets of Cairo”;

What so many people do not seem to realize is that all the issues mentioned here, as well as any others being used as pressure devices, are supposed to be tools created, and set in place to ensure that all human beings get their rights equally, so, logic would say that the tool is not more important than the user of said tool. Therefore, there is no such thing as “we need stability first”, or “we need to revive our economy” before looking into your basic need for dignity as a human. That is illogical, like putting the carriage in front of the horse: the carriage cannot go anywhere without the horse; the carriage needs the horse to pull it; and the horse needs to be well taken care of in order to pull the carriage. Untainted, any of these tools would have at their core the prime directive “to give humans (and more specifically in our case: Egyptians) their needs”. If that is not the case then the system is faulty and should be recalibrated. That is because, the human is what makes anything else possible, nothing can happen without the human being, nothing needs to happen without the existence of the human being, so if you take the human being out of the equation nothing else matters. It is a simple and obvious fact, but it seems that it is so simple and obvious that it either gets overlooked or forgotten, this is when all the ridiculousness, sophistry and splitting hairs happens. If we do anything that does not uphold that truth we automatically lose. Nothing, justifies taking away a human right or abusing a human being in any shape of form. No national problem or crisis comes close to the severity of Egyptians being brutalized. No action should ever justify that kind of cruelty.

Here are some more unquestionable facts for you to chew on for a bit:

· Any Egyptian should not fear Egyptian civil servants; every Egyptian should feel served and protected by Egyptian civil servants.

· Any Egyptian should not have to count their words when objecting to the circumstances in their Egypt; every Egyptian should feel free to say what they want.

· Any civil discomfort any Egyptian might feel for whatever reason is the responsibility of Egyptian civil servants.

· Upholding ALL civil and human rights of Egyptians, on and off Egyptian soil, is the responsibility of Egyptian civil servants, regardless of the circumstances. This is their job description.

· Nothing should come at the expense of the Egyptian. Any Egyptian. Ever!

· If you need to hide something, lie about it, not share all of it, or justify it, then odds are this something is not the best something you could have possibly done and/or endorsed.

There is a distinct difference between a right and a privilege. By definition: rights are the set of freedoms or entitlements owed to someone in a society –be they political, social or ethical entitlements such as dignity for example. As for privileges, they are: a special right, or advantage granted, or available only to one person or defined group of people, such as a high social standing due to your family background. The problem is we are still getting to know our rights, taking them for a spin, seeing if they fit, and probably because of the magnitude of the accomplishment of finally getting what is rightfully ours, a lot of us are still struggling to differentiate between prerogatives are rights and what are privileges, and that the rights of Egyptians, as we have already established them, belong to everyone. More still are trying to understand that you owe it to yourself before others, to provide the same to others so you can assure that what is yours is available for you, at all times, under any circumstances. It is a cycle that feeds itself –perpetual diffusion if you may. If you allow the rights that are equal to everyone, to be denied to one human then you automatically allow the same to happen with another, and another, and then what is to say that does not happen to you too? Why would you be so different?

If you do not assure against the rights of anyone being usurped by enforcing equal rights for everyone, without exception, then you are like the Black Bull in the famous Arabic folklore tale who was eaten by his Lion King, after he systematically sacrificed his brothers, White, Yellow and Red Bulls, to be eaten by their king, thinking this affords him a place of privilege and immunity. Starting with White Bull, Black Bull looked the other way, after the King gave justifications that Black Bull chose to blindly believe, instead of thinking, questioning, and enforcing equality –knowing that it was the decision of the four siblings to appoint the Lion as the king of their realm, and their riches, after their Elephant King died. The last words of Black Bull were: “I was eaten the day White Bull was eaten.” See any similarities?

Denying facts or stubbornly looking the other way so as not to see what you don’t want to see is not going to help you with this one. Isolating yourself from current happenings is not going to work either. It is time for us to realize that we do not have to agree with what our fellow Egyptians are asking for to allow their right to ask for it. It does not have to always be convenient for you. The rules are not yours alone to set. Everyone has a say. You might not always like what you are hearing, but if you want a democracy, you will have to find a way to learn how to listen, tolerate and accept. Put things in their proper context.

Disagreeing with someone, not liking their principles, politics, or ideologies, or even hating someone, does not mean you can justify depriving them of their human rights, or mistreating them in the least. Their human rights are theirs regardless of how you feel about anything to do with them, or how good/moral/powerful this person is. You need to be able to differentiate this very small, but absolutely crucial understanding. Human Rights is an unbreakable, indivisible absolute. That’s the short and the long of it.

The details that define our characters might differ; details like our ideologies, socioeconomic backgrounds, and religions or even how we practice the same religion, but we will always be Egyptians. All of us. With equal rights. Let us not lose our humanity for the sake of varying ideals that are ever evolving. We should not replace our compassion with bigotry, prejudice or selfishness to justify taking the easier route. If we tamper with our moral compass there will come a day when we look in the mirror and can no longer identify ourselves. The unwavering truth that no half-decent belief system out there can go against is the valuing of human life and humanity above all else, without giving conditions or provisos to placing that value. Once more situations sadly prove my theory that our core problem is the unacceptable devaluation of the Egyptian. Value should not come from any outside factors like money or whom you know. You are a human being then you have a value. You are an Egyptian then you deserve your dignity.

I know I have been asking a lot of questions, but here are a couple more to leave you with: where do you stand from all of this? How do you react? And remember: you have to live with yourself and your conscience.

Egypt's Twilight of the Gods

2011-12-11T15:34:00.000+02:00

This idea wandered into my mind one reflective morning giving the brutal events Egypt has been living over the past year, and the noticeable increase in their severity and audacity as time goes. The more insanity unfolds the more it resonates with me.

The legend of Ragnarok, or Twilight of the Gods, from Norse mythology, narrates of the foretelling of the end of Viking gods through a series of events, culminating in one final battle where all of them die one by one, save a couple who can only stand back and watch, as the remaining humans begin to rebuild.

Right now, and for the last eleven plus months, the Egyptian powers of old have been facing their twilight –their end of days. Understandably they have been fighting it tenaciously, after all their survival is at stake. Will they find a way to prevail, and to survive? Will they come out on top? Or will they finally face their own mortality and meet their final death? Not everyone will agree with my depiction of course, and what I am about to say, but this is how I see it.

It is my humble opinion that one of man’s most prevailing unique talents is his ability to tell stories; and not just any stories, but ones that seem to foretell the future and just rouse you to greatness. This is how, I believe, ancient religion and world mythology started: humanity’s attempt to understand the world around them, to draw parallels, make deductions, create order out of chaos, see the invisible and the deeply hidden; make their own conclusions and intricate webs.

Ragnarok: what was supposed to be the end of things, turned out to be a new beginning –which coincidentally, is my theory for 2012, however that’s a different story.

But of course, we are all afraid, confused, frustrated and/or angry, to varying degrees and for different reasons, but yes, most of us are brimming with negative, agitated feelings. Most of which, if not all, are justified reactions, and very, very understandable for where we are right now. I mean let’s face it, Egypt is going through a lot right now, and we have all had our fair share of the crazy –some of us more than others. It is only natural to fear for your life/your family/ your worldly goods, or get confused by the rapid overlapping actions, or frustrated by the sheer possibilities of where we could end up, and angry at not being able to make heads or tails of so many things going on at the moment. So yes, feeling like you are going to blow up is acceptable, however being apathetic and/or callous are not; as is becoming aggressive, and/or forcing your will onto others just because you can. You see the first set, if identified and dealt with, can drive you to positive actions, while the second set can only be destructive, and crippling, creating a stagnant environment of self-enforced (or at least reactively-accepted) lack of knowledge, and what I like to call discontinued logic, because when in panic, it is easier and simpler to turn your brain off, and to not look for the truth, or to just accept what is handed to you without checking it for yourself. When we switch to survival mode challenging our minds and intellect suddenly takes a back seat to, well, surviving. However, we cannot thrive as a species if we do not use our brainpower; if we are merely reactive, then we just exist. Change is scary and unstable, but we cannot grow without change.

Our minds are our most powerful tool, our awareness is our strongest shield and we are only as strong as our beliefs. Strong and sound beliefs are a result of a pure measuring vessel made up of a healthy mind and a balanced conscience, impartially willing to see facts as they are and deal with them accordingly, and always on the look out for anything faulty no matter where it is. If our measuring vessel is defective for any reason, or we consciously or unconsciously tamper with it, then all of our results will be skewed, and consequently our conclusions and our actions. We maintain our measuring vessel hair-weight sensitive by our readiness to challenge ourselves, because that is even tougher than challenging societal or religious dogma and taboos for example, because those kinds of intellectuals boundaries and rigidness are only as strong as we make them over our mind to start with.

Self-awareness (and not self-centeredness), cognition and objectivity are also key ingredients to being able to sustain an uncorrupted evaluation system. If nothing else, having the ability to rationally assess yourself while in any given action or situation, helps you identify how to be an effective human being, because it helps you see who you really are and what you want out of life, and more importantly it shows you that there is no one right or wrong answer, but rather many realities, each available for its most suitable life scenario, and hence, what tools you need to get your role done to the best of your ability. But let me just say that we are not machines so there is no such thing as absolute objectivity for humans, your emotions and beliefs will always interfere, which is all the more reason for you to be able to deal with them logically and be self-aware enough to realize what you are doing when you are doing it. Besides, it is your ethos that helps you in steering your actions one way or another.

I believe it is important for us to realize at this point in time that it is OK to find out that a principle you had once based your life on does not work anymore, or was wrong all along. It is not an easy discovery, I grant you, but it is also not the end of the world. What is not OK though, is realizing that your principles are wrong, and still choosing to back them up or enforce them in any shape or form, because you are too stubborn to admit you were wrong, or maybe it is more beneficial for you to maintain the status quo. It might be easier or tangibly more to your advantage to keep things as they are in their state or wrongness, but morally and ethically they are not, and trust me, there will come a time when you realize, the hard way, how damaging that is –to you before to anyone else. Our minds, beliefs, ethics and codes of conduct should not be stationery and untouchable. We should deal with them as ever evolving and in perpetual motion.

So, come to terms with your fear, and any other emotion that if left unchecked can debilitate you. Identify them, so you can look at yourself and see who you really are, and what your role really is… and it does not have to be the lead role. Not all of us can be the conventional front-row, center-stage hero. Not all of us need to be a front-row, center-stage hero. But even a silent five-second role is important, because when those five seconds come and there is no one there, all we will have is emptiness.

It is up to us, the Egyptian people -and that is anyone who calls themselves Egyptian first, and anything else second; it is up to us to adamantly fight for our right to live in an Egypt that respects our humanity, and our Egyptianity. An Egypt that treats all Egyptians as equals, all deserving of respect and clean, humane living; and by fighting I mean taking an action, whatever that action may be, big or small, direct or indirect, as long as it is what you can do for Egypt, and your rightful place in it.

We need to open our minds, before our eyes, so we can see reality –the good, the bad and the ugly of it, and not shy away or deny it or take it personally.

It is time we realize that with varying perspectives there is more than one correct way to do things. We need to respect other opinions, allow them to exist, and come into play. The upside of a patriarchal system, where the “father figure” is in control of just about everything having first and last say, is that there is just one way to do things… which is also the downside.

We need to stand our ground. For good or for bad we are all making our decisive stands, which collectively will decide the fate of this nation. We might not see it but we really are writing our history. My suggestion is to take the time to pause and evaluate everything. And by everything I mean EVERYTHING. Delusion and denial, while great defense mechanisms, are no longer an option.

Until we consciously decide to unshackle our minds, see things for what they are, be uncompromisingly fair, and act instead of waiting to be acted upon, we will borrow another legend, this time from Greek Hades, and become another Sisyphus: forever pushing our boulder of rights up the steep, unfriendly cliff of Egypt’s current environment, only to have that boulder fall down the cliff, just as we reach the top, only to start all over again.

Don't Force on Me Your Right to Waiver Your Right.

2011-11-24T20:36:00.004+02:00

If you think that the current demonstrations enforce instability, insecurity, chaos and fear in our society, as opposed to what you believe was stability, security, order, and safety pre-revolution, well I have news: that sham we were living was neither stability, nor security, and it was certainly no where proper order or safety when a police officer can stop your care anywhere, anytime no questions asked, and do anything from mildly harass and intimidate you, all the way to detain you... just because you can.

Stability isn't a complete disregard of your most basic civil rights, such as: decent housing, effective education, and clean streets, and useable public transportation, for the sake of lining specific "privileged" pockets.

Security isn't living in fear of the ominous "other", whether that other is different religiously, socially, politically, geographically, or whatever else you can think of, for the sake of securing and protecting the ruling regime and its interests.

Please differentiate between band-aid solutions and distraction tactics, and between flushing an injury clean, and looking at at the real depth of the infection and dealing with it.

Band-aid solutions are fast and neat, and distraction tactics are just easier on the brain; while flushing an injury is longer and messier, and you might not like what you find, but it prepares you to look at what is really there, and to take charge, which is something most of us have never done before when it comes to this country.

Having someone else tell us how certain things should be, is easier and simpler and a viable option, but it's not the right one if you seek freedom of will and responsibility of choice.

Like I said, it's your choice, and we don't have to agree on it, but don't force on me your right to waiver your right.

الخراب

2011-11-24T15:42:00.004+02:00

الخراب ليس التظاهر من أجل الكرامة
الخراب هو اهانة الكرامة

الخراب ليس مؤازرة المصابين و أسر الشهداء المعتصمين
الخراب هو فض اعتصام ناس عزل مصابين يبحثون عن حقوقهم بعنف وبدون سابق انذار

الخراب ليس اعتصام مفتوح في التحرير الى حين الرد على المطالب
الخراب هو قتل وهتك أعراض المصريين

الخراب ليس الدفاع عن النفس بالطوب ولجان شعبية
الخراب هو الدفاع عن منشآت على حساب أرواح أبرياء

الخراب ليس التضحية بكل ماهو غال من أجل مبدأ حق
الخراب هو التضحية بكل ما هو غال من أجل سلطة أو مصلحة شخصية

الخراب ليس تغليب المصلحة العامة على المصلحة الخاصة
الخراب هو تغليب المصلحة الخاصة على المصلحة العامة

الخراب ليس محاسبة من أخطأ أيا كان منصبه ومكانته
الخراب هو تأليه من هو دون الله

الخراب ليس البدأ من نقطة البداية الصحيحة حتى لو كانت صعبة المنال، متمثلة في سيادة القانون المطبق على الجميع على حد سواء، وكرامة الشعب المصري وحقه في العيش الكريم، ومحاسبة ممثليه
الخراب هو التضحية بالبداية الصحيحة من أجل سراب متمثل في أكذوبة أمن واستقرار قامع وعلى حساب حقوق المصريين وكرامتهم

الخراب ليس الثبوت على المبدأ
الخراب هو أنصاف الحقائق

الخراب ليس قول حق عند سلطان جائر
الخراب هو الكذب وتضليل الحقائق، وقول حق مراد به باطل

الخراب ليس البحث عن الحقيقة
الخراب هو تعطيل العقل

Do you Want to be Eaten?

2011-11-24T12:52:00.006+02:00

If you think that it's justifiable for people to get injured, killed or sexually violated (and by none other than the people whose prime objective is to protect them and make sure no harm comes to them), just because someone or some people think that these people shouldn't be in a particular place (or act in a certain way, or dress like that, or breathe this loudly), then what's to say that the same thing won't happen to you if someone or some people don't think you should be somewhere... maybe your home (or that you should act a certain way, or dress like that, or breath that loudly). Where do you draw the line?

If you decide to throw someone to the wolves, or under the bus, or any other metaphor you prefer, because it's more convenient for you, then what makes you think that someone else won't do the same with you if it's convenient for them? Did you ever hear about the White Bull story? Allow me...

It's the story of four bulls: one white, one red, and one black and one yellow, who were owned by a great elephant who died and left them, and their wealth, at a loss, because they never knew how to look after themselves (and if they were honest, they would rather be taken care of than learning how to do it themselves). They decided to look for another owner. They decided on a strong lion they found roaring in the poorer section of the forest. They offer him their deeds of ownership. He agrees and asks them to take him back to their richer section.

One morning Yellow Bull and Red Bull go on a visit, leaving Black Bull and Red Bull home to graze, while Lion looks on in what could've been considered a calculating gaze. Black Bull notices and goes to his side inviting him to join the graze. Lion declines by reason that he should stay in his position to think about the welfare of their kingdom. Black Bull offers Lion his services to aid in any way he can. Taking him on his offer, Lion asks Black Bull: "Tell me the truth my adviser, don't you think that the whiteness of your brother bull is very shiny and could possibly attract hunters? Don't you think he stands out and could be a danger to our peace and safety?"
"Yes indeed, sire" agreed Black Bull. "Do you want me to expel him from our kingdom... for our safety?"
"Oh no, don't do that. I don't want anyone to think I'm an unfair ruler"
"What is your wish, sire?"
"Bring him to me. I am not hungry now, but I think for the sake of our safety I should eat him. When your brothers return we can tell them that he decided to follow them and hasn't returned yet. Maybe he got lost or killed."
"Your wish, sire" agreed Black Bull.

And so Lion ate White Bull, while Black Bull looked away, deciding that extreme times demand extreme measures.

When Red Bull and Yellow Bull asked about White Bull upon their return, Black Bull explained to them, with great concern, how he might be lost or killed, after deciding to follow them and never returning.

One morning Red Bull looked extra shiny in the eyes of Lion. He complained to his advisor, Black Bull, about how in his day he used to attack shiny red bulls, and how he's worried that because of Red Bull's hide they might all be in danger of being attacked by hunters or lions. "I am worried I might not be able to protect us" explained Lion. "I am weak, and haven't eaten in a while. What do you advise me, oh wise Viceroy?"
"Eat, Red Bull, sire, so you can get stronger and can protect us. We can't afford Red Bull to be a threat to our safety."

And so Lion ate Red Bull, while Black Bull looked away, deciding that extreme times demand extreme measures.

A while later Black Bull noticed Lion was growing very weak and sad. "What bothers you, sire?" Black Bull asked.
"I worry about our kingdom. It is growing poor and our population is increasing. Yellow Bull has many wives and many children. Tell me my adviser, what do you think if I ate Yellow Bull and bequeathed you his wives, so you can make sure with your infinite wisdom that our population growth can be regulated?"
"What a great idea, sire! Very wise indeed" Black Bull replied in great satisfaction.

And so Lion ate Red Bull, while Black Bull looked away, deciding that extreme times demand extreme measures.

One day Lion noticed how weak Black Bull was. "What ails you, Black Bull?"
"I am too weak to tend everything on my own, sire. Our kingdom grows poorer and poorer, our numbers grow less and less, and I can't satisfy my many wives."
"It is better that the kingdom's population is less, especially that I am too weak to tend to them" replied Lion "I am very hungry, and you look very delicious, Black Bull"
Lion pounced on Black Bull to eat him.
Black Bull's last words were: "I was eaten the day my brother White Bull was eaten."

Do you get it yet? I don't want to be eaten. Do you?

Discovering Egyptians: Diamonds in the Rough

2011-05-15T15:22:00.000+02:00

(My latest piece for the May '11 issue of Identity magazine)

In the past two months we have discovered a lot of things, about ourselves, each other, and our Egypt; not the least of which being our great potential and our right to greatness, away from all the sentimentality and “Om El Donya” mushiness. Give yourselves a collective pat on the back people. We really are an awesome, respectable bunch when we want to be… when we want to be being the operative phrase here.

Nevertheless, with everything we have been accomplishing, and the super-glued barriers we have been demolishing, we still have just as much to surpass. But that should not discourage us in the least. On the contrary, it should motivate us and stoke the fire within us to not only rise to the occasion, but to exceed our own expectations of ourselves. There is no stopping us now but ourselves, now that the icons of oppression are toppling over one after the other.

All grand gestures and sentimentality aside, and while we admit that we have so much still to do, and lots to learn, we need also to realize that there is no moving forward for us, both as individuals and as a nation without a few key building blocks, upon which we will be able to build pretty much anything we set our minds to. Some of these, in my opinion, are:

For starters we need to be able to look at the big picture, see things for what they really are instead of how we want them to be, and connect the dots, rationally, and not have blinders on, be apathetic, or worse, get drunk on conspiracy theories. We also need to know how to think critically, with minimal emotions (but not in coldness or callousness). Critical thinking and connecting information helps us disentangle life’s tricky thread ball of information with clarity, which will in turn allow us to be realistic and see things as they really are; as well as become more accepting, tolerant and understanding. They will also help us to differentiate between issues, strip them of all the fluff, padding and unnecessary clutter, as well as breakdown problems into small sequential actions for better management. We do not need to be overwhelmed we have to avoid that if we want to be effective members of society.

Along with looking properly at the surrounding world, we should be able to look just as honestly within ourselves. Being candid and frank no matter what will help us maintain balance, and develop moral scales that are what I like to call angel hair weight-sensitive.

Once the outside and the inside are realistic, another important talent we should make sure to develop is having strength of conviction, which will give us courage, but not arrogance, as well as confident voices unafraid to stand their grounds, but not rude and screaming voices that resort to bluffing to cover their weaknesses.

Proper and enlightened strength of conviction cannot happen though without knowledge, so it goes without saying that we need to learn, and teach. However, we cannot do either if we have fears of any kind, be it things like the unknown, rocking the boat, or discovering that any of our theories and beliefs are faulty, shaky or plain wrong. Now is not the time to be blindly stubborn or closed-minded. Now is the time to listen to everybody, research the information to weed out the nonessentials and wrong, reach actual facts, and come up with your own strong and sensible blend.

Since now we are well-balanced individuals, properly attuned with our surroundings and ourselves, who have accurately corroborated opinions, it is definitely vital for all of us to be activists. Not necessarily in the Tahrir Square, or political party sense, but in the I-love-Egypt-and-will-do-for-it-and-not-look-the-other-way sense. That can be accomplished by being responsible individuals, which is the corner stone of any strong-willed society. Fear of failure should not factor in. Failure happens, it is always a possibility for any action, and should not stop us, if anything is should make us stronger and wiser. Finding focus and being goal-oriented is another tool of building properly, as cheesy as it might sound, it is also very true, tried and tested; we should not get distracted by shiny things or loud noises. Being focused will help us master our crafts and take pride in doing them right –I mean, if not now then when? And in order for us to build and continue building and growing our society, we have to stand up for respecting the law, rules, regulations and decent conduct. We also must realize that we have different roles and viewpoints, all of which are needed to create a diverse and healthy nation; it is very important for us to believe in the importance of teamwork and its power.

We have all become pundits and political analysts, which is great, we should all be able to say what is on our minds. What is even better though, is along with having an opinion, we should know how to debate it, as opposed to being rude, shouting and undermining opposing opinions because we falsely think that that is how we should defend our perspectives, or that the two cannot co-exist somehow. On the other hand, while respecting others, starting from your janitor to your country president, is essential, deifying anyone will cut us off at the knees as we should all know by now. Of course, having the ability to think critically at this point would help differentiate between considering someone as your elder and realizing that they are actually a public servant, there to serve you, and that respecting someone and holding them accountable for their actions are not mutually exclusive, they can happily cohabitate.

However, above all, we need to grow ant-level patience and perseverance. Let us not kid ourselves, the kind of reform we want for Egypt (the real life tangible results kind, not political party look at the birdie kind) takes a lot of work and patience, and lots of mistakes. We need to realize this is trial and error and there is a learning curve- probably a steep one. We have a lot to learn and correct.

In short, we need beautiful minds, keen minds. Minds that want to build, and that want everybody to prosper and thrive; minds that want to push up and not pull down. It all starts with the Egyptian; it all starts with the Egyptian mind.

We have already moved huge moral mountains, so much so that two months later after Mubarak’s ouster, the world is still watching, taking note, using us as a role model, and affording us the respect we deserve. For the longest time most of us were nostalgic for olden golden eras in Egypt, opting to live back then. Not any more. Now I would not swap my time for anything in the world. If then was the golden era, now is the diamond one: tough, tenacious and breathtakingly beautiful

Our moment in the sun is ours for the taking.

الثورة الذكية

2011-05-11T15:02:00.000+02:00

إحنا بعون الله اللي عبينا الهوا ف أزايز، ودهنا الهوا دوكو، وخرمنا التعريفة، ومليناها، ورجعنا نخرمها تاني. وإحنا كمان اللي ورينا نظيف لما تحب تقلب حاجة "ذكية" تقلبها ذكية إزاي.

نشطاء تويتر
صور فوتوشوب
طبيعي الظهور على التليفزيون بال آي فون/ بلاك بري/ آي پاد
طبيعي التفاعل على الهوا مع الناس من خلال ال آي فون/ بلاك بري/ آي پاد
آپليكاشنز لمعلومات عن انتخابات مجلس الشعب لل آي فون/ بلاك بري/ آي پاد
رسائل اس ام اس من المجلس العسكري
بيانات المجلس العسكري تطلع الأول على فيسبوك
الحكومة بتكلم الشعب على فيسبوك
نموذج مصغر من الحياة السياسية والاجتماعية المصرية موجود على فيسبوك، تويتر و يوتيوب
أحراز القضايا "سيديهات" و"فلاش ميموري"
صفحات إحنا آسفين يا كل حاجة
الجيش يصور فيديوهات لأحداث البلطجة "ريل تايم"
عرفنا عكشة وزبالايدر على الانترنت

ثورتنا غير

(لو نسيت حاجة قولوا لي)

How Will New Egypt be Portrayed in Mainstream Media?

2011-04-20T06:48:00.003+02:00

So I was watching the movie 2012 and one idea kept recurring to me, not for the first time I might add, but not as wishful thinking this time, but rather as a very possible almost taste-able, touch-able and kiss-able reality, that if Hollywood does another movie like that in let's say maybe 10years' time, Egypt could very well be portrayed as one of the mover and shaker countries taken into the decision-making circle, and that's because in 10 years' time we could've, or rather should've, moved a considerable way along properly aligning our Egypt with its proper standing in the world.

You know what, for all we know, we might actually by then, or again we rather should by then, have a flourishing enough environment to help cultivate the talent that I know beyond a shadow of a doubt is there and kicking to come out, to actually create our own homegrown epic action moviesssss to rival the Hollywood ones. Yes we can.

Hope you have as wonderful a morning as I plan to have!

How Will New Egypt be Portrayed in Mainstream Media?

2011-04-20T06:48:00.000+02:00

Decision Time: Voting on the Constitution Referendum

2011-03-17T17:49:00.000+02:00

If your decision to vote:

1.NO to the constitution referendum will be because you saw some celebrities in a TV ad saying no, or because you're afraid that Islamists will come to power and ban bikinis,then you might as well vote YES.

2.YES to the constitution referendum will be because the Muslim Brotherhood say your soul will be lost to hell if you say no, or because you're afraid that chaos will ensue and you're chasing your elusive idea of a utopic stability that didn't exist in the first place, then you might as well vote NO.

People, take a moment to think. Simplify matters and get rid of all the clutter so you're able to make an educated, rational and balanced decision.

The referendum is about:
1. Egypt's future
2. Deciding what's best for Egypt as a next step
3. Your right to say what you think is best for Egypt given what you KNOW, what you researched and found out, not what you're spoon fed, cornered into, or psyched into or out of through fear.
4. MAKING UP YOUR OWN MIND

In my humble opinion, to make the right decision:
Stop playing follow the leader.
Use your right to think for yourself and decide for yourself.
Don't mix emotions in with rational decision-making.
Don't be afraid to oppose the mainstream if you really believe you have a valid point.
Don't oppose just to be different.
Don't mix religion with politics.
Keep a keen eye on what's best for Egypt.
Realize that you now have the privilege and responsibility to be a part of deciding the fate of Egypt.

The facts are (per the Supreme Council of the Armed Fources:
1. We won't go back to the '71 constitution regardless of the outcome of the referendum
2. If YES prevails, the amendments will be used as a constitutional declaration for the transitional period
3. If NO prevails, the Supreme Council will deliver another set of articles in the form of a constitutional declaration -steps for what's next if you may (which will go into immediate effect with no vote) for the coming period.
4. In both cases we will have a new constitution

Four more facts:
1. The difference between YES or NO when it comes to creating a new constitution is the representation of the people in the parliament: YES speeds up the parliamentary elections and we don't yet have a political arena active enough with varying parties, representative enough of Egypt. NO pushes those elections back a bit, giving the political environment more time to grow.
2. Another difference between YES and NO is that YES decreases the time of the Supreme Council at the helm, while NO increases it. NO also introduces a civilian Presidential Committee, to co-run with the Supreme Council during the transitional period.
3. If YES prevails, some Egyptians will not have the right to run for president because the law and the constitution cannot agree on the double nationality issue.
4. If YES prevails the thugs out on the streets will not automatically be reeled back to prison by magic rope, and money won't shower us from the clouds.

The decision isn't easy, it never is when it matters. Welcome to democracy and freedom :)

You wanted your voice, now use it. Go vote! But go vote for yourself and for Egypt, not for celebrities, bikinis, Islamists or a non-existent Utopia.

Good luck Egypt.
Sent using BlackBerry® from mobinil

الاستفتاء على تعديلات الدستور المصري: بين حالة الحلزونة وفيلم البعبع

2011-03-16T23:40:00.001+02:00

نقول لا؟ نقول آه؟

في ناس خايفة من فوضى لو قالت لا وناس خايفة من الإخوان لو قالت آه. وناس مرعوبة من الرجوع للدستور المعلق لو قالت لا، وناس مش فاهمة ليه تقول آه. آه يا نافوخي آه.

عشان نعرف نقرر بشكل أو بآخر لازم نركز في شوية نقط صغيرة.

امبارح لواء ممدوح حسنين عضو المجلس الأعلى للقوات المسلحة قال كام نقطة مهمة
1. في حالة نتيجة الاستفتاء بنعم فالفترة الانتقالية هتكون قصيرة. أما في حالة نتيجة الاستفتاء بلا فالفترة الانتقالية هتكون أطول (بدون تحديد المدة في كلتا الحالتين).
2.في حالة ان تكون نتيجة الاستفتاء لا فلن نعود لاستخدام الدستور المعلق. بل سوف يتم تشكيل لجنة تأسيسية للعمل على دستور جديد (عشان كدة الفترة الانتقالية هتكون أطول لأن الجيش هيستمر في ادارة شئون البلاد وقتها حتى الانتهاء من الدستور)

3. التعديلات الدستورية المقترحة ليست بغرض ترقيع الدستور المعلق لاستخدامه بل هذه التعديلات بغرض عمل مواد تساعد في حل مشاكل الانتخابات والإشراف القضائي واختيار الرئيس للفترة المقبلة.

4. في حالة رفض الشعب لهذه المقترحات فسوف يتم عمل إعلان دستوري يشمل خطوات الفترة المقبلة لحين عمل دستور جديد.

أظن كده وضحت ان مافيش بعبع ولا فوضى ولا فراغ من أي نوع ولا حتى احكام عرفية لو الناس قالت لا. والجيش قال كل مواطن حر في الاختيار بتاعه.

نيجي بأه لنعم...
نعم يعني

1. الرئيس هيفضل ل 4 سنين
2. الصلاحيات الرئاسية لسة مش معروفة وممكن تفضل زي أو قريبة من اللي في الدستور المعلق. مافيش ضمان.
3. فيه مصريين مش هيقدروا يرشحوا نفسهم عشان القانون والدستور مش متفقين على نقطة الجنسية المزدوجة.
4. اختيار لكشة مواد على بعضها حتي لو فيها اللي مش عاجبك عشان ماعندناش الفرصة للاستفتاء في كل مادة لوحدها.

خلصنا من نعم ولا... نيجي بأه للدوشة بتاعة الإخوان والفلول والاستقرار والسلطات والبابا غنوج...
يا جماعة
1. دي مش حلة محشي الرز خلص ف هنزود شوية خضرا عشان نكمل الحشو. ولا احنا قاعدين نناكف ف بعض عشان لما نعرف ان واحد هيقول آه يبقى أنا هاقول لا. بنلعب احنا هنا؟! خد قرارات بناء على حيثيات الموضوع.
2. ماحدش يقنعنا ان الشعب اللي هد المعبد على أصحابه لما استكفى مش هيعرف يختار اللي هو شايفه صح. كفاية فرض الوصاية ولعبة أنا بابا يا ولد. كل وااااحد يختاااااار اللي هو شااااايفه صح.
3.ربنا ماقلش تعطل دماغك عشان تسمع كلام أولي الأمر.
٤. لو الناس قالت لا مش هيتفرض احكام عرفية، ولو الناس قالت نعم البلطجية المطلوقين علينا مش هيتشدوا للسجون بحبل سحري ولا الفلوس هتمطر علينا من السما.
4. الوضع اللي احنا فيه ده مش بتاع نختار أحسن الوحشين. ماينفعش تختار حاجة مش عاجباك عشان المركب تمشي (أو عجلة الانتاج المخرومة دي).

بس بغض النظر عن لا أو آه م بذمتكوا مش حاجة جميلة جدا أننا ولأول مرة من زمن بعييييييد شاغلين نفسنا بمستقبل مصر الفعلي مش ماتش كورة وحاسين أننا ناس مسئولة وعلى مستوى القاعدة؟ تحيا مصر يا عم!
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Egypt after Mubarak: Hope in the Fog

2011-03-16T20:01:00.000+02:00

My latest article; published in Identity Magazine -March2011 issue

If someone had told me a month ago that I would be writing a piece with this title where I am giving serious thought as to what I and my fellow Egyptians should be doing with ourselves now that Mubarak is an Ex-President (that word still gives me goose bumps) I would have laughed till I had a heart attack.
But all surrealism aside, anyone who has ever read anything I wrote would know that I have always been an advocate of the power of the people, and that the most important resource is the human one. Now that we are on the threshold of a new Egypt it is time for us to put our money where our mouth is and build ourselves as the Egyptians we should be, and demolish the gunk that had cemented over us for decades.
Before you continue reading, let me say that this is my own humble opinion of where I believe we should go from here, because building Egypt starts with building the proper Egyptian, who will know how to run and maintain our Egypt as it should be.
Almost two months ago I had shared in this same space that through consistent and suffocating deterioration Egypt had become so negatively perceived both amongst ourselves and by the outside world that she had ended up creating this love-hate relationship of Freudian proportions, with us Egyptians. I am ecstatic to say that that is no longer the case, and that we have all fallen in love with each other again, and we are now ready to live happily ever after. But, how do we do that exactly?
Since we feel like we belong once more, and have all remembered our Egyptianity, and our strong love for Egypt, we all agree that we want the collective best for her and each other. However, we have to acknowledge that we are all different from one other. Our idea of what is "best" will vary and we will most probably show our love differently, which is perfectly fine since it takes all kinds to make a world. Of course we would be lying if we say that we know for a fact where we are going with this love, and state of newness and rejuvenation in Egypt. It is very foggy at best, but still, in the midst of the thick fog there is hope, and lots of it, we just have to work hard and look well to find it.
Therein lies the problem: what do we do to love effectively?
Well, we need to start by clearly identifying our roles and sticking to them. It exuded a wonderful sense of ownership and investment when people cleaned their neighborhoods during the time when the country was at a standstill, but now it is not the job of citizens to paint the pavements or sweep the streets, however it is definitely their job to absolutely not litter; just like it is not their job to control traffic, but to drive properly. Find your role, understand it well, and do it to the best of your ability.
If you do not know what your role is, and it might not be clear, if you are not a) a doctor, b) an engineer, or c) a front and center political revolutionary, then now is the time to educate yourself.
Even if you do know what your role is, you might still have quite a few things to learn about; issues like your capabilities, your country, politics, economics, what makes a society function properly, and how to be an effective human being. As we agreed, the current scene in Egypt is very fluid and ever evolving. We will be doing a lot of learning and re-learning as we go along. It is also a very good time to ask lots and lots of questions, and listen to as many trusted people as possible. We need to question everything and realize that nothing is set in stone or is a taboo. Nothing is above being discussed and debated. However we need to realize there is a difference between mindless debating, and constructive critiquing. We also need to learn how to differentiate between cold hard facts and hearsay, second-hand tales, or unconfirmed information, and realize that we cannot build our opinions on shaky information just because it sounds good or is inline with my gut-feeling/emotional state/comfort-zone/what everyone is saying. Of course it goes without saying that along with acquiring knowledge, now more than ever it is essential to erase concepts like "just this once", "why me", and "everybody else is doing it". In addition it is now or never that we all emphasize the importance of self-discipline, and self-set codes of conduct. Right is right and wrong is wrong. End of story.
Now that you have identified your role, and are continuously informing and educating yourself, you need to bolster that with courage… courage of knowledge, because you might not like what you find, and it might shake beliefs you had thought were immovable (I strongly recommend a calm and unbiased look at your ideals and ideologies right now. It is also a great idea to revisit them on a regular basis from now on). Additionally, you will need courage of conviction, because once you have an opinion you are held accountable for it, and your particular opinion of choice might not be popular or even liked. But that is what having a true democracy is; everyone is entitled to an opinion, no matter how radical or disliked. Just always make sure that you base your opinions on sound logic so you can debate them and champion them.
I have to add here that along with knowledge we need a fundamental paradigm shift when it comes to our collective thought processes. We need to come from a place of pro-activity and not reactivity. Something like "let someone else start" should be changed with "I'm going to take the initiative", "I don't know" should be replaced with "Let me find out about it", and "It's always been done this way" definitely needs to be thrown out in favor of "Is this the best way to do it?" Once we have the courage to use our power of logic we will be able to shatter all dogmas and worn-out, ineffective beliefs.
After dealing with yourself, now you can move on to dealing with the society and world at large. This is when characteristics like tolerance, acceptance and understanding come in handy. Even with all the knowledge you are collecting, it is OK not to know everything, to feel confused and lost even. It is also quite normal for you to change your mind. It is expected to find someone who knows more than you, or who thinks something different entirely. We have to keep an open mind, use a flexible and curious thought process, as well as make room for others and their points of view. However, we should know how to spot hot air and half-baked truths. Do not give space to every wayward rumor and conspiracy theory. We are looking to build not create cracks. It is OK to expose yourself to everything out there, just know how to keep everything within the right context, and in its proper size.
We have to realize that the country is rebooting, and that it is going to take a while. This is a first for most of us and we do not have a manual. But remember, all good things that are worth it are difficult to come by and take effort and time.
We need to learn patience and unbiased trust, but no matter what we do, we should never ever confuse between giving respect (to someone or something once they have truly earned it) and adoration, worship and/or blind faith.
As for our world-famous emotionalism and sentimentality, it is time to finally put them in check, and not let them overwhelm our critical thinking abilities.
I expect people to not fully agree with what I have shared. Some might think I said too much, or not enough, and that is the beauty of where we are right now, and the new era we are embarking on –everyone is going to have a stand, and advocate it with passion and conviction… and freedom for both themselves and others.
We are ready to build our society. It is up to us. It is up to the people. If you are in doubt let me tell you this… in eighteen days we removed a president and made the entire world stop, pay attention and respect us.

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Let's Talk Politics: Presidential or Parliamentary Elections First?

2011-03-02T14:00:00.002+02:00

I'm going to keep this short and sweet.

It is my personal opinion that the first steps to our freedom are:

1. New government NOW. A government that has nothing to do with the old regime's way of thinking. And now because something as short as one month from now might be too late when we see the tentacles of old gripping the country again in its vice.

2. Constitutional articles that allows us truly free elections, and that do not ostracize any adult, psychologically fit Egyptians. Although, I personally think that creating our new constitution IN FULL, should come before anything else. We need to set the proper guidelines according to which everyone will act, before we set the people in their offices... But that's just me.

3. Allowing the creating of new and independent political parties

4. Presidential elections before parliamentary elections -and that's to give time for political parties to get created, grow and introduce themselves properly for people to elect them. (The president can be sworn in by any other institution that we all agree on other than the parliament. This technicality should not steer the fate of an entire nation -that wreaks of old, rigid mentality that doesn't fit with what Egypt needs now).

The Devil is in the Details

2011-03-01T18:17:00.007+02:00

Let me ask you something: do you realize that you have the right to be free? Do you know that people running this country should listen to what you want and do their best to make it happen? Do you believe in your self-worth? When you answer yes to all three questions, please always keep those truths in mind and never lose sight of them. Please let's all focus on what's important and not get distracted by pseudo-news, rumors and half-baked truths. Let's also not get sidelined by political compromises given to us as "the best solution given the transitional circumstances". A compromise is a compromise, and half truths can never be whole.

Let's remember why all of this started.; because we wanted our FREEDOM. we wanted our country back, we wanted a stake. Freedom is not rationed out or bestowed on some and not others. Freedom is for all. Freedom is not going to happen when we still have old-school mentality at the helm, still fighting against the will of the people, thinking that "Big Brother" knows best.

Our freedom comes when people at the helm finally realize that the true authority is in the hands of the people. Without that shift in thinking we are not going to get anywhere. You cannot force someone's brains into or out of a certain pattern of thought, but you can ask them to step aside entirely to allow a new school of thought in. It is not personal, it is just the proper way to introduce a new, more enlightened era into this country.

We need to realize that what does not fit with the will of the people, and their right to be free needs to be thrown out. The will of the people should not bend to meet with already established practices. If those practices do not fit with what the people need then those practices are not right for the people. The thread starts in the hands of the people, and not in the politics. Politics are there to serve the will of the people, and not the other way around. It's time for us to put things in their proper context. Politicians are public servants and are there to SERVE the people. The military are for the protection of the people, and are there by the will of the people, and are, in all fairness, in a current position that is totally alien to them and need our guidance, the people, in what to do. So let's give them an unwavering and decisive hand.

Mediocrity: Living in the Inverted Pyramid

2010-12-08T18:51:00.004+02:00

(My piece for the November '10 issue of Identity Magazine)

We all know that mediocrity is a central part of Egyptian society. Has been for a very long time now, and with no end in sight, we continue to accept things and actions that would normally be unacceptable. Inferiority overshadows all aspects of our everyday life, from small things like the abrasive lamination (that actually scratches your skin if you are not careful) found on most plastic government-issue cards like your car license and national number ID, all the way to paved roads that dent beneath the weight of trucks, and melt under the aggressive Egyptian heat, sticking to the tires. This attitude has become so deeply rooted within us as a people that when something of normal standards is available, one is overly thankful for its existence.

But just to be clear, the lower and underprivileged classes cannot in all fairness be judged upon our cohabitation with this state of sloppiness, because even though they are an integral part of the problem, they live in a tangled web that first needs to be untangled and spun properly before being evaluated for its good, bad and mediocre. It makes no sense to talk to someone about excellence when his or her more pressing needs of food and shelter are always precariously hanging in the balance and looming over his or her head.

This is primarily about those who should know better. The ones who were lucky enough to not have it so hard, and the ones who might have started in the assembly line, but had enough resources and breathing space along the way to become self-aware after reaching a certain point in their lives. I am talking about the ones, who after all this exposure to globalization mumbo-jumbo can be self-taught if they just take the time and effort to do so. I am talking about the people with a steady, decent job affording them a solid pay check, or who are part of a well-off family so they do not have to worry about money, and can support small luxuries (although they are now deemed necessities) such as a BlackBerry with all the trimmings, nights out at the “in” places, and travels with friends, but are nonetheless unwilling to apply themselves to getting things done properly. They are the ones who are only looking for the sugar-coated part of life, and cannot be bothered with the rest. I am also talking about supposedly mature, well-established, members of society who would rather go with the flow than deliver a job well done, no matter how small. Even though, most of them have lived through a time when great pride was taken in doing something right. Using Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, the people I am holding accountable would be the ones who have managed to fulfil their physiological, safety and love needs and should be moving on to their esteem needs on their way to the self-actualization ones (while the underprivileged classes are still struggling with their physiological and/or safety needs to varying degrees).

This is about personal standards before anything else. What does it say about a person when his or her own individual quality control levels leave a lot to be desired? All because of a prevailing sense of apathy, boredom, and why me when everybody else is doing it? The widespread motto now is a little charm (even the forced kind), and a whole lot of bluffing will get you a long, long way; the now infamous Egyptian “fahlawa”. No one can be bothered to break the chain. In Maslow terms establishing a sense of achievement, gaining the respect of others (let alone your own) and gaining confidence and therefore self-esteem, are impossible without striving for excellence, but we will come back to that.

We have forgotten (or maybe chosen to forget) the unspoken moral and societal obligation to act according to what is right and appropriate, not what is in fashion or easy. Maybe that is because right is not always popular, and requires strength of character and perseverance.

Anatomy of Egyptian-Grade Mediocrity

Mediocrity is unacceptable in the absolute, but it is doubly offensive when you know of a better alternative, because it is far worse to have a talent or certain knowledge and not use it, than not to have it at all. That is just waste, and waste is shameful at best.

I mean small things like taking the proper U-turn less than 10 meters after the convenient, and most certainly wrong U-turn that everyone else is taking. Will it really waste that much of your gas? (This U-turn really does exist in one of the well-known new communities… in front of a big-name gas station, very ironically, I might add).

And another thing, how difficult is it not to litter our streets? I mean really?! Anyone who can afford a car can afford a mini wastebasket for the car. No scratch that, they can afford a simple plastic bag (you know, the ones you get with your groceries). Put your junk there, and dump it in your trashcan when you go home. Simple really!

Now, some might say that these are not examples of mediocrity; these are more manners and attitudes. True. They might also say that these are really small and insignificant things. False. Let me explain.

For the first, excellence is not a fluke but a habit. You really and truly are what you consistently do. You cannot compartmentalise what you stand for or believe in, you take that with you everywhere… most of the time without even realising.

For the second, going completely off course does not happen over night or all of a sudden, it is consistent baby step-like deviations and minuscule compromises, where one thinks things like “just this one time”, “no one will notice the difference”, “it’s OK”, “cutting this corner is not the end of the world”, “don’t be such a tight-a**”… you get what I mean. Before you know it, you end up at a point so far off the course of where you should be –given the beginning of your course- all taken one small misstep at a time. Answer me this: why is it now acceptable to have no standards in our society? Because no one will stop and say no, this is wrong, this is not how it is done, this is how to do it... No one will stand up for the principle. How has it become acceptable to have no standards in our society? By taking one small step off the proper course at a time, by removing every now and then one small, but essential, routine when you think no one is looking or no one will mind –and even if they do, so what? This is how the Chernobyl catastrophe happened. According to the INSAG -7 report (http://www-pub.iaea.org/MTCD/publications/PDF/Pub913e_web.pdf) done by the International Nuclear Safety Advisory Group (INSAG), (part of the International Atomic Energy Agency), operators did not follow test procedure, and in fact “altered [them] on an ad hoc basis”, which along with the bad reactor design resulted in the disaster.

Another incubator of our mediocrity is the lack of maintenance and upkeep, and the laziness of falling back on the laurels of years gone by. It starts off with not being bothered to strive for new accomplishments, and with time ends up with one being not good enough, or having what it takes anymore. And the thing is, no one is above being mediocre if they stop performing properly. Just think of something like all the big names of the 2010 FIFA World Cup South Africa and how they fell like flies in front of teams of supposedly much less significance, just because their heads got too big for their own good and they decided that their names and past victories were significant enough for them to win through intimidation, without actually working and sweating to win. If we move closer to home, we find one of the latest fiascos peppered with poppies and fine art, and malfunctioning security cameras, and underpaid, ill-qualified government employees, with no motivation or proper understanding; a lethal jumble resulting in humanity at large (and not just Egyptians) being deprived of a beautiful piece of world heritage.

It is appalling, but not surprising that this year, after an annual downward spiral, Egyptian universities were finally taken out of the ranking of the world’s top 400 universities altogether according to the annual World's Best Universities rankings by US News & World Report, (based on the QS World University Rankings by Quacquarelli Symonds, one of the world’s leading networks for careers and education. http://www.usnews.com/sections/education/worlds-best-universities/index.html -last updated at the time of going to press: September 21^st, 2010). Now representing the Middle East are the UAE and Lebanon with one university each, KSA with two and Israel with four, while Egypt, home of the first university in the region, and the ancient world’s first library (and for the longest time the world’s biggest library) is completely out of the running. Enough said.

So what are the reasons behind our mediocrity? There are plenty, but I personally believe that our rare blend of the sub-par started off as an unforeseen by-product of two main mutations of the snowball that got completely out of hand that is the July 23^rd revolution; the first being the focus on low cost quantity at the expense of quality; while the second was the creation of a lacklustre mass existence, complete with: unrealistically stable, and deliriously mind-numbing minimum-wage (and sometimes lower) jobs, and assembly-line education –chockfull of manipulated information that makes no provision for any character building. But to properly discuss the reasons behind the two standards would need more space than we have here. However we can safely say that those two paradigms found fertile land in the Egyptian psyche, altering and adapting over time to the different social classes and situations until we now have what I have come to identify as “Life-in-a-Box”, a stale infusion made up of lethargy, apathy, crudeness, wasted brain cells, and an atrophied mind. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you Frankenstein’s monster: a risky attempt at greatness and immortality, getting completely out of hand with lots of unexpected consequences.

Still, I am holding to the opinion that this was unforeseen because I would like to think that this deviation we are living was not deliberate, and started with good intentions: a dream of equal rights and security for the masses. However good intentions, mixed in with the wrong tools and a lack of knowledge of how to translate a vision to doable, measurable, and contained tactics is a toxic concoction. Realising this does not make it any less jarring, of course.

Even Fun is Inferior!

We have become so half-baked that we are now bad even at having fun! Even something as simple as belly-dancing (which mythically used to be passed on in breast milk to baby girls) is now out-sourced!!! With all due respect, what do Russians know about belly dancing?! Why have they invaded the scene? I will tell you why, because a) they are serious and dedicated to the task at hand… whatever that task is, b) we have lost pride in ourselves, and do not trust anything we do, and c) we have the biggest foreigner or khawaga complex I have ever seen. We put more stock in anything foreign, so much so that now even our oil-dealing cousins reap the benefits and buy and sell Egyptians (more morally than physically, which is not any less repelling really), but that is a whole other can of worms for a whole other day. Back to the cold-weather, Russians and our warm-blooded belly dancing, which they have turned into mechanical gyrations, keeping time with the tempo, but lacking all feeling. Not only do they do it professionally, they actually give dance classes, and not just to expats and fellow foreigners, but to natives as well; females indigenous to the land of Taheyya Karioka and Sohair Zaky.

Begrudgingly, I can understand how others like Brazilians can proclaim to know how to belly dance, and they certainly are a simpler pill to swallow when they make a career of it over here… although I do not see them extending the same courtesy to us, if the roles were reversed. Do you see an Egyptian teaching samba in Brazil? I do not think so. For one thing, they take pride in their “thing”, and for another… we are not good enough, no matter what.

It is not that belly dancing is a national crisis, God knows we have lost bigger fish, it is just that we are losing even the fun stuff that we are supposed to enjoy doing, and do not require the resources or dedication as, say, nuclear biology. We are taking a back seat in something as small as that (belly dancing, not nuclear biology). But I guess if you are not dedicated, then you are just not dedicated, the object of dedication is irrelevant.

Motivate Me Motivate You

According to Daniel Pink, author of Drive: The Surprising Truth About What Motivates Us, our key motivators when the skills required are cognitive ones (read: using our heads) are: autonomy, mastery and purpose (of course, before that you have to ensure that these people are paid well enough that they do not have to worry about money, and can focus on getting the job done).

Taking the government, your boss, or any other “big brother” figure out of the equation as the entity receiving the fruits of your labours, these motivators still apply to the individual’s everyday life. However, looking at our reality we find that the majority of people act for the most part like drones, with no real, core objectives, or a sense of purpose, and therefore no need or desire to master anything, let alone realise one’s potential for true autonomy, resulting in a perpetual vicious cycle of knowing nothing of significance and wanting nothing of significance. This is not one that can be pinned on the big, bad government boogieman. This is in our collective hands. Simply put, purpose comes from within (after taking the time to build your unique character and identity), mastery is a desire you cultivate with time (after correctly identifying what your passions are and what you are good at, based on your knowledge of your character), and finally the need (and bravery for) autonomy is the cherry on top (where you are self-assured enough to want to be responsible and self-managed, at the risk of being held accountable for your actions and decisions). This, my friends, is how one finds and fulfils his or her need for self-esteem (remember, Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs from earlier) and later self-actualization. No self-set standards, no personal identity. No personal identity, no self-esteem. No self-esteem, no self-actualization.

Solutions anyone?

I am not saying that the world is rosy and all resources are available for a person to be a world class professional at whatever he or she sets their heart to do. It is challenging, I grant you that… challenging, but certainly not impossible. Just like we are the ones who came up with the silly mottos of “we’re the ones who painted the air” and “we’re the ones who bottled air”, (we seem to have a thing for the intangible, lightning in a bottle thing), we are also the ones that go with “the army told you to find a way”. This is what they were talking about people. This is where you need to find a way.

Obviously there are some key issues out of the average individual’s immediate reach, but that is no reason to give up. I refuse to believe that it should be an all or nothing solution. There is just as much that we can do for ourselves, by ourselves.

Discipline, discipline, discipline! For the most part we under-value discipline and proper conduct. For some reason we have come to believe that the rules do not apply to us.

Maintenance and investment, please! One needs to take care of things they value. Sooner or later neglect and apathy take on physical shape in the form of things like the now un-air-conditioned, “air-conditioned” buses, and garbage piles filling up vacant lots.

Reinvent yourself. Our age-old personal bag of tricks has become just that… OLD. It is time for something new; a fresh perspective; a new way of doing things. One of the definitions of insanity is doing the same action over and over again, and expecting a different result every time.

Root out complacency and passiveness. By all means, love yourself, be satisfied with who you are, but do not be smug, and do not be content that this is as good as it is going to get. There is always, always, room for improvement and growth. It does not have to be moving on from bad to good, it can also be moving from good to better. Trust me you only stop growing when you are dead.

Accountability please. Binding all of this chaos together is the no-accountability zone we seem to be living in. Everyone does what they want, when they want to, whichever way they want to do it. The examples are plentiful, just take a look outside your car window at the cars triple parked on the narrow street you are trying to drive through and you will know what I mean.

Think small actions. Think, what is it that is in my hands to do instead of whining about the way things are. Think, enough with the self-inflicted wounds.

Sure, we all get de-motivated sometimes, it is only natural, we are human. But we need to find motivation for development in all the losses, disappointments, and muck that have come to surround our daily lives. The trick is to not let it overwhelm you. Catch yourself in the act, allow yourself a little slack, but then snap out of it and move on.

Maybe when we as individuals become unconditionally responsible, people will think twice before doing something inappropriate for fear of answerability, people like the co-worker who leaches off of your hard work, or bums around the majority of the workday, or the Minia resident who decided to add part of the street he lives in to his property to expand his house, or, people like one locally famous so-called pop singer, will seriously consider the consequences of butchering a rock classic with his shoddy voice and terrible enunciation, because he knows that we know better and that there is no way we will let him get away with a bad performance.

No matter what you go through in life, do yourself a huge favour and do not become submissive. If you see something you do not like, do something about it, regardless of how big or small your action is. When it comes to matters of principle, no action is too small. We just need to remind ourselves of that from time to time. And you never know, someone might be watching you; they might be inspired by you, and then you have a ripple effect on your hands without knowing it.

The Art of Love -Ovid

2010-10-29T17:57:00.003+02:00

Love is a species of warfare. Slack troopers, go elsewhere!
It takes more than cowards to guard
These standards. Night-duty in winter, long-route marches, every
Hardship, all forms of suffering: these await
The recruit who expects a soft option. You'll often be out in
Cloudbursts, and bivouac on the bare
Ground... Is lasting
Love your ambition? Then put away all pride.
The simple, straightforward way in may be denied you,
Doors bolted, shut in your face -
So be ready to slip down from the roof through a lightwell,
Or sneak in by an upper-floor window. She'll be glad
To know you're risking your neck, and for her sake: that will offer
Any mistress sure proof of your love

White Bikini

2010-06-09T19:22:00.000+03:00

He did a double take so sharp that he almost sprained his neck. Is that her on that guy’s lap? He asked himself. In a white bikini?! He stood mesmerized.

He could not tell for sure if it was her, he had never seen her look like that before, but something deep within him, was almost certain it was her. Even from behind her dark shades he felt it was she. It was the same soft long hair, same smooth skin; granted he had not seen this much of it before, but it felt unnervingly the same. Then he heard her laugh. It is her! he thought to himself. Oh my God!! That laugh!! He felt his heart melt. He watched her swing back with laughter, the man’s arm shielding her from a fall. He noticed the swish of her hair on the protector’s arm. How could she?! She let him tickle her!! His eyes were nailed to her as she squealed from the tickling and ran for protection; only the tickler was swiftly at her heel, effortlessly entwining her waist and spinning her off the ground to more squealing. I was the only one who tickled her before, he remembered wistfully. How could she?!

Just then he heard someone calling out to him. He turned towards the nagging voice and noticed it was coming from under her beach umbrella. Up until that point he had not noticed there were other people there. Eagerly he went to greet his caller.

Moments later she returned to the shade, lightly embraced by that same man, he noticed.

“Hey love birds, this is my friend…”

“We know each other” she interrupted neutrally. “We go way back to high school.” She continued, taking her shades off. She glanced up to the man next to her before extending her hand to the man from her past “How have you been?” she asked, her voice still neutral.

“I’m good thanks” he replied, taking her hand in his; she remembered the deep rumble of his voice. The sun caught something on her hand and he noticed the gold band enveloping her ring finger.

“Nice to finally meet you” came the greeting from the man with a similar gold band, he observed, as the embracer extended his hand with a warm and confident handshake.

“Finally?” he asked, confused.

“I wore his ears off with tales of my school years” she explained, smiling up to her fiancé.

“Yes she did” fiancé teased back. She playfully punched his bare abs.

“Don’t mind those two, they’re nauseatingly like this all the time. We’re hoping it wears off once they’re married!” explained the seated friend with a roll of his eyes.

“Yes please,” echoed a couple more friends in unison.

“I hate to break it to you guys, but it won’t” she explained.

“She’s right” fiancé agreed, holding her closer.

“Congratulations” he heard himself saying “when’s the big day?”

“Forty five days from now” fiancé beamed at him. “I’m starving,” he continued to the group at large “Anyone else hungry?”

“Yes” came the collective agreement from under the umbrella.

“Minion. Go get us some food” fiancé ordered his nauseated friend.

“No.” nauseated friend replied.

“You forget you’re my bitch for the week. You don’t get to say no. Now shake what your mama gave ya” he chuckled. She laughed.

“My baby is all heart, isn’t he?” she teased, lightly rubbing his tummy.

“You know it” he replied beaming down at her, moving for a soft kiss.

“All right, all right, I’ll go, just stop already you two. Who’s coming with me?” the friend asked, turning to the rest of the seated company. They looked away. One announced going for a swim, and swiftly everyone agreed.

“I think I’ll go for a quick swim too, before the food gets here. Wanna join me?” fiancé asked her with a meaningful tone in his voice that no one seemed to notice but the couple… and him. He could not believe what he was seeing and hearing. It was like she was a different person… only still the same. Same loveliness. New vibe. A sexy, illusive vibe, teasing you out of your mind. When did that happen? How did that happen?

“I think my body’s had enough salt for today” she replied softly, her face very close to his.

“OK monkey” he replied, adding another soft kiss.

“Don’t stay too long muffin” she said kissing him back. Kissing him back! He though in amazement. Green with envy. His insides squeezed with longing.

She stood watching as fiancé ran into the lapping waves. Smiling to herself, she turned around and took her seat under the sun, catching the last of the day’s rays.

“What was that?” he blurted out before thinking. He was going to take advantage that they were alone together for the first time in over a year.

“Huh?” she asked absent-mindedly.

“All the kissing, and the hugging, and the pet names. Pet names?!! Since when were you a fan of displays of affection, let alone public ones?!” he asked, his voice dripping with accusation.

She turned towards him, alert again. “Excuse me?!! Do you really want to go down that road with me?” she warned. He would not budge.

“Please enlighten me. Why weren’t you like this when we were together?”

“Oh so we were together, were we? We weren’t just “friends” as you liked to call it?”

“You know what we were”

“I did, but you didn’t”

“Don’t start that”

“I’m not starting anything, you’re the one who brought it up. I finally put all of that behind me. I don’t care about that anymore”

“Now you’re just being hurtful”

“No I’m not” she replied calmly. “Really I’m not. I don’t mean that in a mean or callous way. I just let go of the past so I can have a life with the man I want to share the rest of my life with. I owe that to him. He deserves nothing but the best from me.”

“And why’s that?” he asked sarcastically. She remembered that tone clearly.

“You still need to ask?” she asked calmly, giving him a deep look. “That’s the problem.” She sighed. “OK. I’ll tell you… Because he treats me like a princess. He makes me feel like I’m the most precious thing to him in the world… and he makes me feel safe.”

“You used to feel safe with me! You told me so.”

“I’m not talking physically. I mean emotionally. I feel like I’m his and he’s mine, and only mine. He doesn’t make me feel unsure, or insecure. He doesn’t keep me guessing. It’s not a game to him, and that’s because he’s not unsure. He knows what he wants. He wants me. Just as I am. And that makes me want to be the best version of myself possible.”

“I wanted you”

“Maybe. At one point in time. But not enough… you didn’t want me enough… I know that now. You were always on the look out for the next best thing. The best possible option. You were disappointed that I didn’t fit the picture of a certain type you had in mind. A veneer you wanted to show off. You never really looked at me for who I am, and appreciated me. You liked that I still loved you after all those years. It was very flattering. So you kept me as an ego booster. Sure you loved me, we were each other’s first loves, and that still meant something to you. But you didn’t love me enough. Not enough to help me grow and flourish, and in turn help you grow and flourish. It takes two to build a relationship and your heart was never really in it.”

She sighed, put on her sunglasses again and looked away towards the sea.

It was very rare that he was without a comeback. This was one of those times, he realized, with anger.

“You never let me touch you like he does” he mumbled, his voice accusatory. “You never wore a bikini before when you were with me either.” The hurt in his voice was very clear.

“You more than anyone else, knows that it’s the guy’s job to make the girl feel comfortable with the physical stuff, and I guess now you know that I neither have a problem with physical intimacy nor, am I frigid, as you tried to persuade me way back when. You can also see that I didn’t turn out to be a prude either, ” She paused, pointing at her bikini “you just wouldn’t let me find the right bikini for me”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean you had the habit of trying to force me into or out of certain things so I can fit this image you had in your mind of how your partner should be. You wouldn’t just let me be. You wouldn’t let me find my own way to you. To being your partner. It made me feel awkward.”

Realizing the silent implications of what she had just said, she continued. “I’m sorry. I’m not trying to attack you. What I mean is like I said, it all boils down to the comfort and safety factor, and we never had that. You never gave me that. Maybe I didn’t help you. I don’t know.”

She looked his way again and noticed the pain in his eyes. She did not want to hurt him. Maybe there was a time when she had fantasized about inflicting as much pain and embarrassment on him as humanly possible, but not anymore. Not since she has made her peace with their episode together. Not since she has found the real love of her life.

“I’m sorry if I never gave you the chance to cherish me.” She started, wanting to ease his pain. “It was never my intention. I loved you more than anything in my life.”

“Do you still love me?” he asked, the all-too-familiar selfish child in him coming to the surface again.

“I’ll always love you. You were my first love. We shared a lot. You taught me a lot. We have history that will always be there.” She explained, as an egotistical smile beamed across his face. “But my heart, body and soul belong to another man. That’s why I told him about you. I owed it to both of you to be honest with him. I owed it to the memory of what we had, no matter how painfully, for me, it had ended, to acknowledge it. And, I owed it to the man I wanted to make a life with to share every part of me.”

They stayed silent for a while as the profoundness of what she had just said washed over him. He would not admit it to anyone, not even himself, not really, but he was remembering their time together. What he had done, what she had done, the good, the bad, and everything else in between. She was right… but not entirely of course, he added. One particular memory overwhelmed his senses, one from their very last encounter together, but he fought very hard to suppress it. He did not want to recall it. Not just yet.

“I guess congratulations are in order then” he said finally, attempting to smile as she looked back in his direction. He got up from his chair. “May I kiss the bride-to-be?” he asked hesitantly.

She smiled. Just for him. One last time. He tried to push away the memories that smile invoked in him.

“Sure.”

He moved closer. Bent down. She turned her cheek towards him. He hesitated. He kissed her lightly. For one second he was overpowered with the great urge to take her in his arms. To drown her face in kisses. To remind her of the love she had for him. And then she looked up at him, and he knew. For the first time he realized that she was not in love with him anymore. Her eyes did not look at him with the same ardor they once had for him. They did not give him the same adoring look they now give the fiancé. He straightened up, as that thought washed over him like an ice-cold shower. He did not trust his voice just then so he just smiled before turning around to walk away, and he could not suppress the memory anymore. He heard her wounded voice ringing over and over in his head “One day you will realize what you wasted away”.

You Know You're Dealing With Kuwaiti Heat When...

2009-05-31T11:40:00.007+03:00

Cold tap water gives you 1st degree burns
Tanning in the summer means anything from crispy to charcoal
The car thermometer reads 46 degrees Celsius… in the shade
The official temperature would read 44 degrees Celsius
The news broadcast dedicates a portion of its time to hydration tips
There’s a law that states once the temperature hits 44 people shouldn’t go to work
There’s another law that states no outdoor labor takes place between 12pm to 4pm… ever
Dangling earrings can scorch your neck if you sit in the car for more than 1 minute without the AC on.
Washing dries in 30 minutes maximum… in the shade
To get slightly cool water you use the water stored in the switched off boiler, because that’s the only place where there’s no heat.

and that's just the tip of the melted iceberg...

Logic and the Veil

2009-03-29T19:15:00.009+02:00

(My piece for the April '09 issue of Identity Magazine)

The Holy Quran says that deeds begin with intentions (and are therefore, judged, by God, accordingly). That is why we humans, are supposed to take things by appearances and at face value. With that in mind, this article takes a look at the appearances of the phenomenon of the modern-day veil as a statement –albeit not a religious one- and its subsequent ramifications. It also shares various points of view from the Egyptian society at large. What this article doesn’t do though, is pass judgment, or stand for or against.

To be clear, this isn’t about certain socio-economic classes forcing their females to wear the veil, more out of a societal requirement than a religious appeasement (like wearing a half-sleeve top coupled with their veil, because the purpose is to literally “cover their heads” and not anything else).

This is about the veil as an accessory, worn to adorn the latest fashion; it’s about the veil equaling a decoration, and not representing good religion, beginning on the inside and translating onto the outside.

A Troublesome Piece of Cloth
Like so many things that lose their track because of too much meddling, somewhere along the way the poor veil lost its identity. Nowadays, some mark it as a sign of female oppression, and a measure of how backward a society is. Just look at the myriad of vehement opponents calling for the annihilation of the stifling headpiece, calling it demeaning to both men and women, and saying that we’ve already emancipated women way back in 1923 by the illustrious Hoda Shaarawi.

No offense, but I like to call these people neo-liberal pseudo-intellects. At the risk of sounding paradoxical (since I might appear to be losing my previously alleged objectivity) allow me to explain. Without boring you with too much detail, Islam was the first religion to give females their full rights, announcing them as their own person, with clear and detailed rights and an independent financial existence from males. Most interpretations of the schools of Islamic jurisprudence, state that the veil (or hejab), is a religious stipulation (and therein lies all the fuss: in the argument of is it or isn’t it). Unless we disagree that Islam is a cohesive and wise religion that doesn’t contradict itself, then the veil can’t be oppressive, demeaning or disrespectful to the Muslim female.

As for the 1923 symbol, the removed fabric in question (and not burnt as commonly believed) was the “yashmak”, that society forced upper class females to always wear when out in public. Among other problems, females of that era had next to no rights, a result of societal and not religious oppression. The Shaarawi action had nothing to do with religion, and everything with the fight for women’s civil rights, given by Islam and taken away by man. This is the context people overlook.

The second group tampering with the pivotal veil are those who personify it as the end all and be all of religion for the Muslim female –meaning she can’t be a devout Muslim, or at the very least God-fearing and religious in the proper way (and the only way apparently) if she hasn’t covered her hair. It’s like writer Ala’a Al Aswany once wrote: it is as if Islam was sent to humanity so that females can cover their hair!

The problem is the misapplying of what we’re told to do. Being veiled is not the alfa and omega of a pious woman’s Islam, it is also not a sign that a woman has gone back to the dark ages when she chooses to put it on (chooses being the key element here). But human beings love to split hairs and complicate things.

Truth be told, it’s possible that because of the latter group that the former thinks of the veil as abusive to women. It’s quite possible, that had it not been for the stifling emphasis on a female being veiled, we wouldn’t be faced with youths condemning the Islamic head cover (or misusing it), giving off a plethora of wrong impressions about veiled women and Islam at large.

So, what has all of this got to do with the façade veil? Plenty. It’s very possible that this is the starting point. It’s the natural, but nevertheless warped, progression of how the ideal has been steered off track. Everyone is making their own rules and declaring them the right way to be. Then why shouldn’t they do as they please as well? Why shouldn’t they be covered head to toe in a paradox?

Losing my Religion
It’s my personal belief that every human being is an ambassador of what they stand for. So what kind of an ambassador is this girl in the contour-hugging outfit that leaves pretty much nothing to the imagination, topped off with a piece of scarf that might or might not cover her hair in full? What does it represent when a lot of the veiled females don’t look any different from their non-veiled peers when it comes to clothing, if it wasn’t for the wraps around their heads? What does this attitude say about her religion for those who don’t know it that well? I’ll tell you what it says, it says things like: silly and nonsensical on the good days, and oppressive, hypocritical and contradictory on the bad ones; because why should she cover her hair if she’s showing everything else; If not by fact then by insinuations? This is what losing purpose is all about.

And then some people say, and actually believe, things like “at least she’s covered” or “she’s better than a lot of others.” Does any of this sound right to anyone?

Look at Me! Look at Me!
We’ve all seen them. Party in a veil, I like to call them. I’m talking about the major production that the wrapping of the 21st century veil has become, with the multiple sheets of fabric in all colors of the rainbow, and the shimmering pins, and the dangling baubles (seriously) –making one think of a five-year old’s birthday cake. I’m all for looking pretty, and I’m a fan of the double toned simple veil. I can also understand the need to have a special “do” for a special occasion, but come on, don’t you think it’s overkill when you have that well-known ruffled look (you know the one that eats the face), just to show up to work, or hang out with your friends?

Personal legislations: forcing a wrong to be a right
Doesn’t all this feel like it defeats it’s own purpose? Theoretically, the purpose is to cover up the supposed coveted areas of the female body. Somebody tell me, how is any of this covering up the coveted areas? Logically speaking, why put the veil on in the first place if it’s no different on or off, in fact it would only mean more restraints?

How is it a good thing to be self-contradictory? This quasi-veiling philosophy is a compound wrong that is forced down our throats as better than nothing, but is really just an abuse of a religious stipulation that makes no sense at all, is a terrible misrepresentation of Islam, as well as the women of Islam, and its crowning glory is that because it’s so paradoxical it actually attracts the attention, which is not what it’s supposed to do, in fact it was put into place to do the exact opposite. Go figure!

At face value, how is this person better than another girl, just because she has her hair covered, but her body on parade? Covering your body with form hugging fabric doesn’t mean you have your body covered. You might not see the skin, but you can still figure out the contours of the body. If anything, tight clothing is more alluring than showing skin because it’s an insinuation, an inkling of what’s underneath… nothing is more provocative than a hint at what is just out of reach. I ask again, how is that better?

Uh-Oh
They seem to have overlooked one fundamental point. This semi-veiled attitude shoots itself in the foot. Apart from the obvious provocative factor, this would also fall under something known in Arabic as ‘Lebas a-shohra’, loosely translated to “Attire for Fame and Pride”. That is because when a veiled female gets her fashionista on and wears the body hugging outfits, and/or her major production head pieces, she immediately attracts attention more than anyone else around her, since she’s going against the grain. We’re not supposed to dress in a manner that makes us stand out in our society. This, of course, is exactly what they’re doing.

The Reason
Peer pressure has been accused of causing many a peculiar actions amongst teens, the latest being this fashionista veil. Apparently the girls form cliques and exhibit the classic case of cookie cutter syndrome, dressing exactly alike, until one feels that looking at the row of friends is like looking at a hazy TV screen with faulty coloring.

If it’s not the pressure then there’s going with the flow. They do it because everyone is.

There are also those who admit that veil fashion is nicer now and more appealing, and totally in!

Another reason is attributed to the reformer craze. A few of the females I had talked to bravely claimed that the main reason why they had first gotten veiled was because of listening to a very famous reformer, who is believed to have single-handedly paved the way for modern-day reformer advocates in Egypt.

I also found out that a lot of the females, who got veiled after hearing this man preach, have now removed that veil. Their reasons varied from feeling stifled (metaphorically, not physically), and wanting to dress as they please, to they no longer believe that the veil is mandatory.

Of course there are always those who just hate their hair and would rather cover it, and others who think it’s more economical to be veiled, since they wouldn’t be spending money on things like hair, earrings, and necklaces.

Lucrative Business
However, you would be surprised to know that it now actually costs the same, if not more, to be veiled, because of all the extras a veiled girl has to buy, be it the multiple veils in matching colors for the layered looks, or the myriad body suits worn under clothes as a cover. And don’t forget the stylized veils, and what it costs to get them done.

Then there are the ancillaries: the CDs, books and training sessions teaching one how to tie all the complicated styles, identifying the best styles for your face and clothes, and of course your best colors.

Double Standards
I have this theory that one goes through certain levels of evolvement, in a specific sequence as a natural progression to their personal growth and learning –think: learning to walk before running. Following that belief, a veiled female would be a good example of how a well-balanced Muslim female should be, since she’s shown enough understanding of her religion, and willpower to shun the temptation of dressing attractively, and choosing instead to cover her body in the manner God has ordered. This is the theory of it in layman terms. Our current reality, however, is shockingly different.

The problem goes deep: it’s not just a bad exterior; the interior is a sham as well. I’m not sure which corrupted which. The chicken and the egg come to mind.

Good religion is not just covering your head with a bit of fabric, it’s following all of the other rules as well, especially the overlooked ones, like, not gossiping, not lying, being clean, being polite, treating people kindly, and realizing that you have to be an overall honest and decent human being because if nothing else, you respect your religion enough to do it justice by representing it to the world as best as possible. For example, the classic wasting of work hours under the pretext of prayer time is not good religion; taking only as long as really necessary once prayer time is called for and, then going right back to work is. Leaving a messy bathroom behind you as a result of your ablution is not good religion; cleaning up your own mess, on the other hand, definitely is.

During a work-related trip a supposedly pious veiled female lost her bag. Luckily I found it, and took it to her cabana. She opened up the door just a crack, took the bag and gave me a very curt thank you, then just shut the door while I was still standing there. Her husband later explained that she hadn’t let me in because she was home alone. I was speechless. She seems to have forgotten that smiling in the face of a fellow human being is deemed an action big enough to warrant a reward (or hasanah); that politeness is very important in Islam, and that embarrassing someone is a very big no, no. All it would have taken was a genuine smile, and a brief explanation of her reasons.

The examples of little daily things that Muslims overlook are countless. Instead focus is gravely misplaced. It’s not about the appearance of piety, but exercising real piety in manner and attire. What these women do is reduce the veil from a symbol of good overall religion, to a cumbersome piece of restraining cloth.

Religion is a lot about common sense. Is it common sense to live an inconsistency?

Schism
Dealing differently with females just because they look on the outside a certain way is not healthy for our society. Subtle discrimination is not right, it breeds nothing but contempt. You can’t make the veil the only measure of what’s good; it obviously doesn’t make one female better than the other. There’s more to it than that. None of us are in a position to make the right judgment, and it’s not even up to us, so why bother? In case people have forgotten, the Quran says that you shouldn’t force anyone into or out of anything… to each his own religion. So if Islam accepts the peaceful co-existence alongside atheists, who are we to separate between the veiled and the non-veiled?!!

And how about all that female-only stuff; you’ve got your women-only club nights (huh?), and women-only beaches (better known as no man’s land) to name a couple. Although I personally find the women-only thing a bit creepy, I can understand the need for the occasional letting loose. To each his own right?

Although, I seriously doubt that they know their religion properly. If they had known they would’ve realized that while you’re not supposed to be exposed in the flesh to foreign males you’re also not supposed to be exposed in the flesh to other females from the navel to the knee –meaning things like bikinis are unacceptable.

Then the female-only was taken to the next level: Muslim-only. Yes it does say in Islam that you risk the possibility (emphasis on possibility) of doing a wrong if you appear without your veil in front of a woman of a different religion, for fear of her later describing you to a male (which of course can also happen from a Muslim female to the same effect and punishment). But seriously, look at the bigger picture. It’s sad to say this, but we live in a time of great religious sensitivity. Is it wise to exercise this right at the expense of a greater danger? Is there any outcome other than creating a rift between Muslims and people of other faiths? For God’s sake think before you act! God asked us to do just that.

This is how factions and fractured societies are made, and unfortunately, we’re on a highway headed in that direction.

The Inverted Pyramid
Now the wrongly veiled are all that we see, not because that is all there is, but because they are the peacocks, and peacocks exist to attract attention. Unfortunately, the ones who take the veil seriously are overshadowed by their in-your-face counterparts, because they’re so understated, which is the core purpose of the veil anyway: to not be apparent and attractive. So the sugar-coat veil ends up being in the lime light, and ruining it for everyone else. Ruining it because now people doubt the sanctity of the veil; it’s lost its meaning and impact. Ruining it because these shadily veiled women have the audacity to think that they’re better than non-veiled women just because they have their hair out of sight but everything else visibly outlined.

The People Have Spoken
A good friend said something that I believe is an excellent example of enlightened, level-headed Muslim females (who also happened to be veiled). She said: “I behave myself not because of the veil, but because I am a Muslim.” I rest my case.

Unfortunately, the example that she and others like her, set has become quite rare. On the other side of the spectrum we have veiled women who guys believe are too uptight to the extent that they put them off veiled girls entirely, therefore feeding the monster that it is all but a spinster sentence for an unmarried female to get veiled before she finds a husband.

Then there are the ones who other veiled females believe give them a bad name, because of their questionable mindsets and approach to life. And of course we cannot forget the ones who seem to have covered their minds as well as their hair in the process.

Who are these people?
I saw this program once on a famous religious channel, and I was riveted. Not because the presenter (an up and coming young reformer) was saying something ground-breaking, but because of how he was saying it. He was talking about the attire of most modern veiled females using about half a dozen mannequins as visual aids. What really caught my attention though was his hypocrisy. There he was eagerly showing how every outfit did not cover the female form properly, and the areas that God said are attractive to man and should be appropriately concealed with loose clothing, while he himself was dressed in a form-contouring pair of jeans and a top that ended half way across his… ahem… behind. Doesn’t the esteemed reformer, who apparently took the time to attend the school for preparing reformers (which supposedly stipulates that you be a graduate of Al Azhar first, which he was not); doesn’t this reformer know that males are supposed to cover (also with loose material) the area between the navel and the knees? You could clearly see the contours of his supposedly “coveted” areas.

Apparently this guy is amongst the best in his category, with a considerable following to his name. I won’t claim that I know all of them and their work, but if this is a sample of what the best of the pack offers, I shudder to think what people seeking religious advice from him and his equivalents are exposed to.

Now what?
I guess one can say that the reason behind all of this is the lack of a core, in terms of values, reasons, and beliefs. Therefore, it is only natural that with the lack of real substance, the focus turns to trivialities.

The key here is to be a good Muslim. Until the outside is a reflection of that, those borderline schizophrenics are just a bunch of hypocrites.

Ramblings of a Fool for Life

Perception

Self-Employment: The What, Why and Who

Egypt: Clothed in Nothings

بين التمثيل المشرف وأنصاف الحلول

أصول اللعب

مصالحة بين الحياة اليومية ومبادئ المدى البعيد

The Right to Your Right

Egypt's Twilight of the Gods

Don't Force on Me Your Right to Waiver Your Right.

الخراب

Do you Want to be Eaten?

Discovering Egyptians: Diamonds in the Rough

الثورة الذكية

How Will New Egypt be Portrayed in Mainstream Media?

How Will New Egypt be Portrayed in Mainstream Media?

Decision Time: Voting on the Constitution Referendum

الاستفتاء على تعديلات الدستور المصري: بين حالة الحلزونة وفيلم البعبع

Egypt after Mubarak: Hope in the Fog

Let&apos;s Talk Politics: Presidential or Parliamentary Elections First?

The Devil is in the Details

Mediocrity: Living in the Inverted Pyramid

The Art of Love -Ovid

White Bikini

You Know You're Dealing With Kuwaiti Heat When...

Logic and the Veil

Let's Talk Politics: Presidential or Parliamentary Elections First?