Half Dead Guy Blog

Google Boosts Your Brain Power

2009-01-18T10:34:00.000-06:00

Good news for all you Half Dead Guys out there. A recently published study claims that using Internet search engines actually improved brain activity in key decision-making areas of the brain. The study even goes so far as to say that Googling could benefit the brain more than...

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Hair Abuse = Corruption?

2008-12-19T22:24:00.001-06:00

Half Dead Guy just can’t get his folically-challenged head around the corruption charges against Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich. Coming from a long line of early-to-reveal their scalp men, I realize the importance of not wasting a nice, full head of hair. It pains me to see someone waste...

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MenoPorsche

2008-12-13T13:00:00.002-06:00

By Guest Contributor: Not Quite Half Dead Guy (S.S.) MenoPorsche (MEN.uh.por.shuh; MEN.uh.porsh) n. 1. Angst and anxiety exhibited by some men upon reaching middle age, especially when those feelings manifest in the purchase of a sports car or an affair with a younger woman. 2. A sports...

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One Step Forward, Two Steps Back

2008-11-19T21:53:00.001-06:00

By One Foot In The Grave Guy Hey There! I want to let you know how my new fitness lifestyle is coming along. After just over 10 days into it, I’ve come to learn that this is going to be quite a commitment for a couple of reasons. 1. Eating healthy cost more than eating...

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Getting Back in Shape

2008-11-10T19:32:00.002-06:00

By One Foot In The Grave Guy Of course by the title you’d think that this guy was once in shape, but that would naturally depend on the definition of “shape”. For most Half Dead Guys like me, we wake up one morning, and while looking in the mirror actually stop and wonder what...

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Electing To Give

2008-10-30T21:25:00.000-05:00

The Half Dead Guy has been accused by his better half (BH) of talking about money too much. I'm not going to disappoint BH or my Dear Readers when the fruit is ripe for the picking. A quick bit of research online show that this year's presidential candidates will raise a...

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Q: When's a Crawl Space Not a Crawl Space

2008-10-24T19:58:00.002-05:00

A: When it Floods Background: We recently had our crawl space filled with water when the river we live on crested during a three day storm downpour. Since we live on a river, we are required to hold FEMA Flood Insurance. The adjuster came out, reviewed the damages, submitted a claim and we...

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I Know Who You're Voting For

2008-10-17T23:58:00.001-05:00

While we sat and ate dinner last night, Half Dead Guy's son who is 7 (and 3/4) came up with a doosey. "Dad", he said "I know who you're voting for." Half Dead Guy pays attention to politics. So much so, that he consciously does not talk politics in front of his...

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Identity Challenged

2008-10-11T22:57:00.005-05:00

MAG was quite surprised to find a shiny, freshly pressed credit card with his name on it waiting in the mailbox last week. He was doubly surprise considering the much-hyped credit turmoil and general financial disaster currently grabbing headlines worldwide. In addition, MAG hadn’t requested this...

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Revolting Taxation

2008-10-05T22:13:00.000-05:00

The hot topics last night at the Rock the Block fundraiser for CURE were the bailout and the fresh-to-your door Cook County Real Estate Tax Bills. If you're not lucky enough to live in Cook County, I can only describe the feeling of opening one of these tax bills as much like having a...

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The $700 Billion Guide To Parenting

2008-10-01T00:02:00.008-05:00

Let me first state that I am not an economics expert. If I were, my bald head and I would be in D.C. right now with the fellow follicly-challenged Ben Bernanke and Henry Paulin. Secondly, even though 700 billion is a huge number, it's not as big as the 13 million-digit prime number these...

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Reader Pulse - Middle Age Dude?

2008-09-26T21:20:00.003-05:00

So far this blog thingy has been pretty much one sided. I'm OK with that, but now is your chance to chime in. View this video by a Middle Age Dude (MAD? - no relation to MAG) and comment or vote (or both) below: This Middle Age Dude

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Curing Repetitive Task Existence (Part 2)

2008-09-24T10:28:00.012-05:00

I promised in my last post to reveal how a greeting card changed my life. No, I didn’t use it to fend of an attacker with threats of a paper cut. Speaking of crime and greeting cards, I once heard that almost all greetings cards are written by inmates of our penal system. Think about that next time...

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Curing Repetitive Task Existence (Part 1)

2008-09-20T08:47:00.023-05:00

I received an e-mail on Wednesday morning from one of those impossible to cancel joke-a-day services. Between the myriad of ads I found the following gem: A man is not old until his regrets take the place of dreams - Yiddish Proverb For some reason, I couldn't get this phrase out of my head. I...

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Soggy Cheerios, Dodi Al Fayed, and Character

2008-09-17T08:07:00.040-05:00

There are four events that I can remember where I was, who I was with, and what I was wearing. Only my wife knows exactly what I was wearing the other days of my life. In order of memory burn-in intensity, these are: 1. 9/11 2. Princess Diana's car crash 3. O.J.'s run from the law 4. O.J.'s...

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Helping Hand or Lawsuit

2008-09-15T17:31:00.024-05:00

I just returned from cleaning up my sister's basement which pulled in about four feet of water over the weekend. It turns out the condo next door's sump pump wasn't working at all requiring her pump to do double duty trying to evacuate water from both basements. The neighbor had about four feet...

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This Just In - Flash Flood Warnings

2008-09-14T20:24:00.008-05:00

Issued by The National Weather ServiceChicago, IL 11:06 pm CDT, Sun., Sep. 14, 2008 ... THE FLOOD WARNING REMAINS IN EFFECT UNTIL 1000 AM CDT MONDAY... FOR NORTHERN BENTON... PORTER... LAKE... JASPER... NEWTON... LA SALLE... WILL... KENDALL... KANKAKEE... GRUNDY... LIVINGSTON... IROQUOIS......

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Flood Time in Northfield Illinois

2008-09-13T21:42:00.009-05:00

While the U.S. focused its resources and efforts on Huricane Ike, Chicago was flooded when between 6 to 12 inches of rain fell in a 24 hour period. Tens of thousands of homes were flooded. As you can see from the video my eight year old son Chris had a lots of fun playing in the water. Most of...

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