Random Rants and Musings on Life and Everything.

Goodbye Lovers

noreply@blogger.com (Stephie) — Mon, 25 Oct 2010 16:45:00 +0000

I’ve decided to call it a day with the blog. I’ve had it for few years now and I don’t really have the time to update it or write anything that’s particularly interesting these days (presuming that I ever did in the first place!). So that’s it for now. From now on I’m just going to write when I have the time and badger people in to letting me post on their blogs. Probably blogs that are more serious than this one. And with less swearing. Maybe.

Thanks to those of you who read and left comments over the years. I had a massive following of about eight people. All of your comments filled me joy, and sometimes mild irritation. But mostly joy. Love and cake to you all. Thanks to those of you who just visited the blog and read stuff. To those anti-choice weirdos who insisted on sending me bullshit emails, your appalling grasp of even the most rudimentary of grammar rules said far more about you than the content of any of the emails.

The internet is a big place so maybe I’ll see you around. I'll still be commenting on your blogs. You can't get rid of me that easily. Ha.

Go raibh maith agaibh,

Stephie x

Banksy must be shitting himself

noreply@blogger.com (Stephie) — Sat, 16 Oct 2010 13:46:00 +0000

The Real IRA took some time out from being infiltrated by Brits and pretending to be Derry's answer to the Red Army Faction, to spray some of their new found "radical rhetoric" on a wall in West Dublin.

Precious Life are a bunch of irrational nutcases.

noreply@blogger.com (Stephie) — Sat, 09 Oct 2010 13:26:00 +0000

Sometimes it can be incredibly depressing being a pro-choice activist in Ireland.

The PSNI are now investigating a conference on the clinical practice of abortion that took place in the north of Ireland during the week on foot of complaints from anti-choice groups.

Yes, that's right. A CONFERENCE. Police time and resources are being used to investigate the legality of a group of doctors in a room discussing a women's health issue. No actual abortions took place. The fact that they discussed them is enough to warrant an investigation apparently.

According to a police spokesperson, the PSNI is “seeking legal advice”. People may look at this and say “Oh well it’s only legal advice”. The fact is legal advice isn’t free. This kind of thing takes up time and resources that would be best spent elsewhere.

Apparently if any “illegal activity is identified the appropriate action will be taken”. Well considering no actual abortions took place at this conference I wonder what they possible illegal activity they believe could have taken place. The correct thing to do to Precious Life when they contacted the PSNI about this would have been to laugh in their faces, put the phone down and get on with….oh I don’t know….how about investigating the fact that the north has a 7% rape conviction rate perhaps?

No, sure why would you bother doing something that might require actual work?

Much easier to deal with this kind of thing and take your lead from a bunch of batshit crazy woman-hating people who get their jollies from waving foetus placards and telling women they’ll become child abusers if they have an abortion or suffer from permanent sighing and cancer, and be frigid, and promiscuous sluts, all at the same time.

Bernie Smyth of Precious Life (bear in mind that your life is only precious if your foetus, these lunatics don’t give a toss about you once you’re actually born) thinks that the conference was “inciting” criminal actions. So what now, are they going to call the PSNI every time Alliance for Choice have a meeting on the grounds that this could count as incitement?

Bullshit. The whole thing is bullshit.

Here, watch some George Carlin to cheer yourself up if you’re as pissed off as I am right now.

Halloween Costume Fail - Sexy Rosie the Riveter

noreply@blogger.com (Stephie) — Sun, 03 Oct 2010 22:43:00 +0000

This just makes me depressed.

The only saving grace for this utterly ridiculous costume, is at least I would automatically know to avoid someone wearing it. Kevin Myers would probably piss himself with the excitement of seeing this.

For your viewing pleasure

noreply@blogger.com (Stephie) — Sat, 02 Oct 2010 23:56:00 +0000

On Complaining.

noreply@blogger.com (Stephie) — Sun, 19 Sep 2010 15:52:00 +0000

I don't usually write letters of complaint, but in the absence of being able to talk to an actual human being on a customer helpline, or talking to a human being who has absolutely interest in what I am telling them them, I have decided to take wander a new road and write letters of complaint and see if that helps instead. I wrote this last week. Unsurprisingly, I have not yet received a response. Bastards.

From	Stephanie
to		"athome.ie@vodafone.com"
date		Mon, Sep 13, 2010 at 9:20 PM
subject		Please fix our internet.

Sep 13 (6 days ago)

RE: Customer Number, XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Dear Vodafone,

I am writing to you regarding Vodafone broadband system that has been installed in my house. The package we are currently paying for is allegedly meant to be 3mb. According to one of the many customer service agents that my partner spoke to Vodafone are currently “upgrading” the line and apparently this is meant to result in a faster speed. I realise customer service agents are only doing their jobs, but this is beyond a joke.

I cannot describe how appallingly slow it is. I have come to the conclusion that I would be quicker sending a pigeon to a library to find the answers to questions rather than attempting to use Google. I am even longing for the days of dial-up. Say what you will about dial-up systems – yes they were slow, yes they were awkward and tiresome, but at the end of the day you knew you would get there eventually. Unlike this Vodafone broadband system which merely pretends that it is going to connect to a website and as it is loading (at a rate that makes me believe that your internet system is actually powered by a small mole on a treadmill hooked up to a system of manual levers and pulleys) it disconnects. Repeatedly.

This internet line has never worked correctly since it was installed. There is nothing wrong with the laptops we are using in the house. They connect to the internet just fine everywhere else. The problem is with the router. There is only so many times that I can “troubleshoot wireless connectivity problems” before I actually want to begin to self-harm. If I have to go and “reset the wireless adapter again”, even one more time, there is no telling what I might do. We have tried ping tests with the line connected into the computer and most of the time it still doesn’t work. One day I was in my house and I had to reset it by switching it off and switching it back on again that many times, it began to feel like some kind of weird torture. I’m actually surprised the CIA hasn’t cottoned on to this, and began to use it as a mechanism to extract information from their “suspects” in rendition centres.

We are paying for a service and are entitled to receive said service. All I want is a consistent 3mb service. I don’t even care about the upgrade. Just the bare minimum will do please. I’m not trying to download 40,000 albums or anything. I’m just trying to send an email, and I don’t know, maybe even send the odd facebook message. Ideally, I would like a service that allows me to work from home. That was the intention when we installed the service. Unfortunately, it appears that the hamsters powering my router have either fallen into a coma or have gone on strike.

Either way, I am formally requesting that Vodafone either fix whatever is wrong with our line, or give us a new router, or allow us break our contract with Vodafone without incurring financial charges and penalties and allow us to find an internet provider who will actually give us what we are paying for.

Unless of course, Vodafone is the Ryanair of internet providers? Ryanair have this thing where you book in on a flight to Berlin, but you actually fly to an airport in Poland. So perhaps Vodafone install a phone-line in your house and say you are getting wireless broadband, but you actually need to go 100 yards up the road to a neighbour’s house to get online. If this is the case, I’d appreciate a compass, a map and directions to said house. If not, I implore you to help us and fix this problem.

Yours, hopefully,

Stephanie.

New Game - "REPENT"

noreply@blogger.com (Stephie) — Fri, 06 Aug 2010 09:25:00 +0000

It being Friday, many of you may be looking for a pleasant drinking game for tonight. Check out this not-at-all-bigoted-man's list of people that need to "repent". By repent, this friendly man obviously means have a shot of the drink of your choice according to my new game "Repent (Drinking with the Bigots).

Here's how it works.

1. Gather your friends. If you don't have any you may feel a little sad and not in the humour for tomfoolery. In this case, switch on Chat Roulette for a while, and remind yourself that there are others worse off than you.

2. Ensure that everyone has the bottle of something strong. Those who do not drink alcohol can referee the game. Or take part, but it may not have the same effects.

3. The Referee should have a list of all of those who need to repent (as pictured above) and read each one out with a three second pause in between them.

4. Every time the Referee reads one of the labels that you identify with (e.g immodestly dressed woman, feminist, sodomite etc.) you must repent by taking a very long swig from your bottle.

5. The person who empties their bottle first wins the game and gets to go to "HELL". "HELL" in this case is actually an acronym for the "Hall of Ethereal & Luscious Liquids". Which is of course, a euphemism for the fridge. The winner should also receive a life size statue of two gay men dry-humping as pictured in the image above. If no statue is available re-enact with humans, according to tastes of the participants.

6. Replenish drinks and begin again.

Enjoy. And drink safely etc. etc. etc.

Image via Huffington Post

Dan Savage - I love you very much

noreply@blogger.com (Stephie) — Mon, 26 Jul 2010 18:11:00 +0000

Jane Austen's Fight Club

noreply@blogger.com (Stephie) — Mon, 26 Jul 2010 17:28:00 +0000

Quality local journalism from the Drogheda Independent :)

noreply@blogger.com (Stephie) — Wed, 14 Jul 2010 10:12:00 +0000

The most profound question

noreply@blogger.com (Stephie) — Wed, 07 Jul 2010 22:47:00 +0000

Esther Hicks is a lunatic who has made millions spouting nonsense like this. I am in the wrong fucking game. What the "most profound question" really is - who buys this crap?

As they say in Dublin, "Stung bleedin' rapih'"

noreply@blogger.com (Stephie) — Wed, 07 Jul 2010 19:04:00 +0000

Mr Frank McAveety, a Labour member of the Scottish Parliament perves on a 17 year old in the gallery.

Penneys win the Spelling Bee

noreply@blogger.com (Stephie) — Mon, 05 Jul 2010 18:43:00 +0000

Dear Penneys/Primark,
This is what happens when you have five year old Taiwanese children making your clothes for you - spelling errors. You people have no shame.
Yours,
Stephie.

On hypocrisy

noreply@blogger.com (Stephie) — Mon, 05 Jul 2010 00:28:00 +0000

Bigots Anonymous

noreply@blogger.com (Stephie) — Fri, 02 Jul 2010 09:27:00 +0000

Far-right MEP’s have displayed their true colours this week when members of the European People’s Party grouping in the European Parliament stated that there are links between homosexuality and paedophilia. Apparently they feel that children should be protected from “homosexual propaganda” and “homophilic paedophilia”. In a nutshell, they basically said that if you’re gay, chances are, you’re probably into kids as well. It’s the EPP members that are the sickos here.
What’s interesting is that the Fine Gael MEPs are members of the EPP grouping in the European Parliament. Nice bedfellows indeed for the potentially future government party. While they might be supporting the (still somewhat flawed) Civil Partnership Bill making its way through the Oireachtas at the moment (courting the 'pink vote'?), it’s still something to bear in mind that these are the types of people they associate themselves with in Europe, when it comes to the next general election.

~~Leopards~~Blueshirts don’t change their spots it seems.

Feminism according to bookshops in Dublin

noreply@blogger.com (Stephie) — Thu, 20 May 2010 11:55:00 +0000

Twelve Angry Accountants

noreply@blogger.com (Stephie) — Mon, 17 May 2010 00:30:00 +0000

You have to wonder about the DPP’s newest idea that those on trial for white collar crimes should be tried by special juries of people with “financial qualifications” rather than ordinary Joe-soaps selected from the electoral register as in the normal course of events. His point is that where a case involves an allegation of bribery, members of the general public could decide on a verdict. But where it’s in relation to some complex financial wheeling and dealing it might be a bit more complicated, and according to the DPP, it will be too complex for us ordinary folk to understand.

He wants to see a situation where white collar crime is treated in the same way as a 17 year old who robs a shop, which on the face of it seems an idea of some merit. Leaving aside the fact that a 17 year old is still a child, and generally speaking juvenile crime tends to arise as a result from markedly different reasons than say, the 40 year old from Blackrock who fancies a bit of fraudulent trading – they are very different crimes and the response to them probably should be different – but I see where he’s going with it.

But if you’re going to have a specialised jury for white collar crime because they’d be more likely to understand what they’re dealing with – and the point is that you want all of these crimes treated in the same way – shouldn’t you have specialised juries for all crimes then?

By that logic, could you then propose that rape trial juries are made up of people who work in the violence against women sector? They’d be more likely to understand the nuances of the offence after all.

The other thing is of course, is that Ireland is a small country. Dublin is not a city, it’s a big town. Ireland is parochial, and the six degrees of separation that applies globally is probably reduced to about two degrees here. Everyone knows a cousin, or a friend of a friend. I’m constantly surprised that on Facebook, people who I never in a million years thought would have had any connection to each other; turn out to be very pally. I’m not sure what qualifications the DPP is proposing the potential white collar jurors should have but when you get to such a high level of specialisation, wouldn’t it be possible that all of these people would actually know each other? Or they would do by the end of their careers because it would probably be the same 12 people serving on every trial. At which point you’d have to import jurors and it would no longer be a trial by your peers.

Surely if there are problems with jurors not being able to understand the offence and the evidence laid before them, the logical thing to do would be for the court to do its job properly and walk the jurors through it step by step in a way that they can understand it rather than attempting to change a fundamental principle of justice?

Peaches - Fuck the Pain Away Feat. Miss Piggy

noreply@blogger.com (Stephie) — Thu, 13 May 2010 19:44:00 +0000

DANGER!! At Risk of Lesbianism...

noreply@blogger.com (Stephie) — Sun, 09 May 2010 20:17:00 +0000

An article about the Dóchas (women’s prison) Centre in Mountjoy in

today’s Sunday Tribune caught my eye today. The Dóchas Centre is one of two prisons in the south of Ireland for female prisoners. The usual run-down of what goes on in the unit was written about; hair-dressing classes, courses, education and rehabilitation. You know, all the things that one would hope could help rehabilitate a criminal woman for when she re-enters the world after serving her stint.

However, those that run the Dóchas centre have noted that there are some problems and risks that the inmates face.

No, not heroin addiction or violence. It’s Lesbianism. That’s right one of the subheadings in the article reads “Risk of Lesbianism”.

Apparently the out-going governor of the Dóchas Centre Kathleen McMahon has had a “major problem” with the situation and said that “lesbianism was among the risks associated with prison overcrowding”. Lesbians are the now the most noteworthy dangerous threat to the stability of the prison. I don’t know which is worse; the Governor of the jail framing lesbianism in a way that presents it as sinister or unnatural, and therefore a “threat”, or the fact that article treats lesbianism as something that a woman might just fall into as if women who have sex with women are just suffering from some sort of “Lack of Penis Syndrome” while they’re locked up.

MIA and the rounding up of redheads.

noreply@blogger.com (Stephie) — Thu, 29 Apr 2010 22:18:00 +0000

There's one particular mural on a wall in this video, that makes me wonder if MIA actually wanted to have this video set in West Belfast at the height of internment but didn't have the nerve to do it seriously.

Or is it just a commentary on the arbitrary bullshit nature of racism?

Or is it just a publicity seeking video that would appeal to South Park fans and those who like very violent video games?

Either way, I still love MIA.

M.I.A, Born Free from ROMAIN-GAVRAS on Vimeo.

The Daily Mail Song

noreply@blogger.com (Stephie) — Mon, 29 Mar 2010 10:47:00 +0000

You are cordially invited to the opening of....

noreply@blogger.com (Stephie) — Thu, 25 Mar 2010 11:04:00 +0000

I can’t stand Joe Duffy. What’s more, I can’t stand Joe Duffy and Paul Williams have more influence on criminal justice and drugs policy than anyone on this island with as much as a thimble-full of intelligence. I’m fed up listening to the “Howaya Joe” brigade on Liveline talking about how civil servants and headshops are ruining the world. The people protesting may as well write on their placards "CLOSE HEAD-SHOPS! GO BACK TO YOUR DEALERS!"

Because that's all that will happen. The fact is, Irish people want to get off their faces. They'll either buy stuff in a shop to do it, or they'll buy it off a bloke outside a chipper. Whatever, they're still going to do it.

So I’m opening my very own headshop on Molesworth Street, the hub of the decaying moral fabric of Irish society! Catering for the hysterical masses seeking passports, I will join public sector workers in ruining everyone’s holidays/lives but will dish out free samples of Clarkey Cat to those who can't go on Santa Ponza stag weekends.

I will be peddling my non-medicinal psychoactive substances in the specially named "Joe Duffy's Good Buzz Emporium", and will be sending him an invitation to it's grand opening consisting of a handwritten note saying;

"Stick that up yer hole, you moaning c*nt".

Bart Stupak and the Magic of Wikipedia

noreply@blogger.com (Stephie) — Sun, 21 Mar 2010 13:06:00 +0000

There's definitely a Pulitzer in the post for him

noreply@blogger.com (Stephie) — Sun, 21 Mar 2010 11:51:00 +0000

“If St. Patrick got you the healthcare vote, would
you come to Ireland?”

Charlie Bird, RTE’s Washington Correspondent, interrupts Cowen and Obama.

(via Sunday Tribune – link not online yet...)

Soundtrack to my life

noreply@blogger.com (Stephie) — Sat, 20 Mar 2010 19:26:00 +0000