Random Thoughts, Things and People

Getaway

2013-01-16T03:57:00.000-08:00

Two weeks ago I encountered a beach in La Union where its history is different from among other beaches that I've gone to. Relatives of a friend of mine told me how a hectare or more used to be water but when the the 1990 earthquake occured. A huge part of water turned into land. According to the residents the seashore is until the church. There are still parts of water in the area but turned into marshes. You are also able to walk on sand even though the beach is miles away. I'm just amazed how the earth can change something in land or water. If that's the case, continental drift can happen again.

It's like I'm seeing people from the past in this town where food could just be picked right at their backyard, where they raise chickens and cows. The only thing you'll hear is the wind and the birds chirping. Another thing about the people who lives near the sea is helping each other by pulling the catch of the day. It's been years since I've seen Filipinos do the "Bayanihan." Residents pull the net and those who comes from back would return up front and it goes on and on until it's at shore. The net contained thousands of fishes but there were more jellyfishes. I don't know what these fishes are but they look more of sword fishes. They have long bodies and long snouts. Women separate them from other species of fishes, then those who helped will get a share of the fishes. But most of them will be sold at the market. I got a taste of the fish, they've given me a whole one. We grilled them by the shore.

This is the life, where you don't need to worry about other people, work and problems. You just need to get away from them sometimes and learn other things from other people.

Rewind 2012

2012-12-30T18:21:00.000-08:00

This is my last thought of the year and my notebook's also full so I need another one. This year had changed me a lot. I've found somethings to look forward to in the next years to come. I learned to live alone and away from my family but it made me stronger. It made me crave for what I really love. I've met people, some were great and not so great. I've created friendships that I wouldn't think it would turn out to be successful. A year full of fun and failure but it turned out to be a challenge. It made me know myself and others around me. I've learned to trust and not to trust.

I was like in an independent movie, full of secrets, and intrigues where not everyone could watch it or understand it. It was amazing and not amazing year at the same time. As I write this, I am rewinding all the events that had happened for the past months. An episode of breakdown made it harder for me but I've passed through it. My heart's been broken so many times but not my soul. Still I would like to say Thank you to everyone who'd accepted my quirkiness and to long time friends who tried connecting me but I disconnected for sometime. They inspire me to do more because they're the greatest people in the world. Distance and time cannot break an almost a decade of friendship but it made it tougher because of what our hearts say to each other even if we didn't see eah other that much.

Those rainy days that flooded my way yet I still walked and took me to safety to people who really do care. It's my first time to feel the ickiness of the dirty water just to get home. Those days were not great but some people turned it to humor and bondage. Those traffic days which made me think deeper and not just look but to carefully see more what's around me. It made listen not just to the noise but also to the people. Through those book hunting and author signings which made me happy for sometime. Those broke days and I didn't know where to go and yet I still survived. Those feelings of insecurity and anxiousness should be left before the clock strikes 12.

This is not a new chapter of the book but it must be rewritten. It must be edited. This time there must be more positivity and break the silence inside and bring it on. Let's rock the world tonight!

Have a Happy New Year everyone! See you next year!

The Fault In Our Stars: A Review

2012-09-11T09:25:00.001-07:00

Young adult writer like John Green executes his books with humor, heart and life such as how he did with his novel The Fault In Our Stars. This is not a story about surviving cancer or life itself but it’s how someone remembers you when you are gone. The plot may have ended tragic but the important message is a memory left that must not be forgotten. This is a sad love story like Romeo and Juliet minus the suicide of Juliet but adding cancer as the villain.

Hazel Lancaster being the narrator and the protagonist of this book starts her journey as a 16 year-old thyroid cancer patient. Depression is eating her up so her mom lets her join this support group for cancer kids where he meets 17 year old Augustus Waters who was diagnosed with osteosarcoma at a young age. His right leg was amputated. The first time they’ve set their eyes on each other, there’s a spark. I know, this book is full of clichés but I love how the author turned them fresh and new since this is a teen love story. They got to know each other: Hazel loves to read and Augustus was an ex basketball player. Her favorite book in this planet is An Imperial Infliction but it wasn’t finished so she emails the author, Peter Van Houten asking how the story ended. No response from him but when it was Augustus turned to email him he responded but did not answer the question either since he also got interested with the book. He’s upset since it didn’t have an ending.

He proves his love to Hazel by giving his wish to Hazel. She wants to go to Amsterdam, find the author and finish the novel. They’ve get to experience a dinner and enjoy the sparkling scenery of the Amsterdam Canal and stayed on Hotel de Filosoof. But once they’ve met the author he’s alcoholic, rude and a nasty man. The trip was arranged by his secretary who’s kind and generous enough to fulfill their wish. They left the house of the author angry and frustrated. They went home with some unanswered questions. Some ugly events happened when they went flew back home. Augustus already knew that his end is coming near. The cancer is spreading throughout his body and she sees him slowly deteriorating.
He died a week after he needed to hear the eulogies of his Hazel and his friend. This book is a real tearjerker especially when she found out that Augustus wrote a eulogy for her and he needs Van Houten to edit it. The fault is really in their stars: they’re destined to meet but also destined to be apart from life. Death may have ended their love story but it left a legacy of optimism towards her and life. And I deeply praise John Green for writing this book. It made me laugh and cried more but most importantly it made my mind and heart stimulate of things to ponder and choices to make.

Rate: 4.5/5

The Frequency of Radiohead

2012-04-01T21:27:00.001-07:00

Every once in a while a band with different sound emerges from the deep. A unique music with a certain sadness yet it's still inviting. The voice of Thom Yorke has a timbre of soothness that it goes with his emotions. A soundtrack relatable to loneliness, melancholia, aloneness, but it has mystery that gives the band its name. The slowness of the instruments played gives effect each member of the band contributes to the voice of the frontman, as he succumb to the lyrics. This band can write songs that pertains a journey through a deep tunnel. The lyrics may have sublimnal meaning and can be interpreted by different listeners. As I listened to them, I haven't notice that a tear was already on my cheek.This is also the soundtrack of who I am, together with Haruki Murakami which contributes to my emotions.

I never stopped listening to them. I grew up listening to them. I'll still be listening to them even when I grow old.

"Don't leave me high, don't leave me dry.."

Thus "Boredom Kills"

2012-02-02T09:44:00.000-08:00

I've seen him in the last few days. Invisible yet it has a strong. It slowly tortures you as the time goes by. As hours pass, it succumbs inside me as I lay down to think what I should do.
Thinking! Thinking! Thinking! Sigh!
There's nothing to do, but to toss and turn. All I can do is to wait for me to fall asleep. Do everything in my dream. Hours and hours passed.
It seems like days. This excruciating torture is nothing physical but mentally. It surpasses the brain nerves without even knowing it's even there.
More sigh! More hours had passed and my brains are almost getting fried. There's no one to talk to. It's like I'm inside an asylum, paranoid on just about everything.
I'm starting to stutter, stare at a lot of things and boom, I'll explode into nothingness or yet a question of existence but somewhere else.

Melancholia Is The Name of a Planet

2011-11-29T15:30:00.000-08:00

Melancholia is an emotion. It's a feeling of deep sadness and quietness. Amidst hundreds of people out there, one person sits and think of things that are unthinkable. Teary eyed. Unfinished food. Noisy chattering of people which cannot be understood. Gibberish as it may seem. Amidst the people around, there is melancholia. It's different from depression but it sort of like the same. Amidst hundreds of people smiling, there are other mixed emotions felt at the same time. Cornered by what everybody knows as "compartmentalization." Well not everybody knows this but somehow unconsciously it's there. They're just not aware but they can feel it everyday. The whole day and even in their dreams. The dress that you've only wore once was soaked with you in the river. Floating with flowers in your hand, lifeless like, staring blankly at the sky. Waking up, and not knowingly people are out there. Celebrating your happiness but you know you are not happy. You tried to run away but only unconsciously and not physically. Your white dress slowly floats as if time had frozen. but not again. The green luscious surrounding witnessed your running away stunt. Denying would only make it worse. Somewhere lightyears away, there's a heavenly body behind the sun. Somewhere light years away, it's coming near the planet earth. It's not yet felt for now, but soon it will. Hailstorm, hurricane, flood, heatwave are expected in the future. While you drown yourself with anguish, sadness, bitterness, and frustration from the life you thought was going to be "perfect." It doesn't going to end well well. But it will end right.

It will end the world. It will end your misery. It's going to cause chaos but in an organized way where no one will be left alive except you. Is this the change you want? If not, then how? From lightyears away there is heavenly body called Melancholia. Should planet earth be the one to be called that name. You know there are full of people who looks happy but they are not. They are smiling but not either. You are just faced upside down. Or pretending to be... then the collision countdown starts in an hour.

based from the movie of Lars Von Trier

A Random Poem

2011-08-23T01:30:00.000-07:00

She knows that time can never be hers.
And time can never be his.
Distance approach as her tears starts to fall.
She sees the Knight behind her, not towards her.
Oh Knight! She wished of the Fairy Blue’s magic.
“Time be not an enemy, Fairy Blue please send your magic dust.
Send the Knight back to me.
I am falling back into my shadow. When you are lost in
my heart and forever just a dream.”
"If Death is the only answer
then Death I shall call" she said
"If its deathscythte will struck my heart
then forever he is me.. "
The Fairy Blue heard her but it's not her wish
she wants. She wants her to wake up from
the meander she made with the Knight.
She wants to stop the tears and the thoughts
of Death. The Fairy Blue sprinkled the magic
dust..

This poem was written on the 10th of January 2011. This was just suppose to be a connecting ideas with other poets from a social networking site. There is one line from a member then continued by others with their own thoughts. I separated mine and it made sense putting them together. And I don't have a title for it for now. Just sharing it.

The Science of Heartbroken

2011-08-19T05:46:00.000-07:00

When human beings fall in love they feel certain happiness inside. They feel all the positive energy coming around them. They would establish good relationship with other people. They will do nice things toward their lover and also to their family. But just like everybody knows the heart is involve in these feeling of love but in fact it’s the brain. There are certain chemicals responsible for this kind of emotion. They are called the oxytoxin and vasopressin but what happens to these chemicals when someone got dumped or heartbroken.

What is oxytocin? This chemical is being released by the brain while a person is in a relationship. It deepens the relationship where trust and faithfulness enters. The emotions are deepen towards each other that they’d rather be together everyday and all that they can see are just their selves. This is important towards strengthening the emotions of each other. Before the oxytocin there is an initial chemicals that are released they’re called the dopamine, serotonin, and adrenaline which is responsible for the attraction towards other people. They are neurotransmitters responsible to the first emotions that a person feels when falling in love. These chemicals will reverse once the feeling of heartbroken introduces itself.

The autonomic nervous system is the first that’s being affected. There will be a change of heart rate, blood flow, blood pressure and digestion but these are just some the effects. The cortisol is the hormone responsible for the stress rises and frails the immune system causing fatigue and sickness. The person will experience insomnia or just lying on the bed having a hard time to sleep. The main brain chemicals for the person’s emotions on the feeling the love is being withdrawn when heartbroken occurred. The decrease of oxytocin will increase anxiety and fear to a full level. They are having a hard time sleeping, eating and working because all the motivation is gone.

This maybe the case but life goes on because the brain will return to normal and you will have your life back after you are done with this stage. This is the stage of recovery where you start over again and meet another person.

Taken by Cars Taking Me

2011-08-18T21:35:00.000-07:00

This is the new line up of the band

This is just the kind of band that I would be dancing all through out the evening. Taken by Cars is an indie band based in Manila. Their music as I will describe is a blend of electronic and rock with a twist of new wave. The first single that I’ve heard from them was Uh-Oh and I loved it. I said I need to hear the other songs on their first album Endings of a New Kind. I can say that their songs can be great if you are traveling far and you are beside the window of the car. Just listen to how fast the beat of the drums as it plays together with the other instruments blending with the androgynous, sweet voice of Sarah Marco. They may sound like other bands hailing from U.K. like Bloc Party which I also love listening to. They may sound like other bands but for me they are the first Filipino band that I’m listening to this kind of genre. The other songs that I fell in love with the first album are Stereolove, Shapeshifter, Colourway and The Afterhours.

This was the first line up of the band

The second album which is called Dualist has cleaner instrument execution and the voice of Sarah is still as smooth and sweet. I even love this album than the previous. My favorite single from the album is 34 and I played it like 5 times just today. This Is Our City is also a catchy single. As a whole this band is great and thank goodness I will finally see and hear them play here in Baguio. I can’t wait for that day.

They will be performing in Ayuyang on September 17, 2011 with other Manila bands such as Pedicab and Miscellaneous and of course our one and only representative Skydive Academy which by the way our friends. I would be dancing all night by this gig and just savor the music and beer as the night forwards to morning. See you Baguio pips on Sept. 17.

The band:

Sarah Marco: Vocals

Bryce Zialcita: Lead Guitars

Derek "Siopao" Chua: Rhythm Guitars

Isa Garcia: Bass

Bryan Kong: Drums and Sample

Rules In Surviving Zombieland

2011-08-18T05:34:00.000-07:00

When all else fail and an infection was gotten through mad cow disease by eating a hamburger and spread towards humanity turning them into flesh eating undead all you need are survival skills thus you must have rules.

Rule Number 1: Cardio

Rule Number 2: Double Tap

Rule Number 3: Beware of bathrooms

Rule Number 4: Fasten your seatbelts

This is now the United States of Zombieland.

Zombieland is directed by Ruben Fleisher. This is an action and comedy film about how to outwit those zombies by which the characters make their own rules in surviving the plague. The setting is post apocalyptic led by Jesse Eisenberg as Columbus who travels alone to find his family in Columbus and has a set of rules since he has no friends until he met Tallahase (Woody Harrelson) , also a survivor but he’s journey is to find for Twinkies. The two of them hook up together to find their destination when they’ve met the two sisters Wichita (Emma Stone) and Little Rock (Abigail Breslin) who always out smart the boys who have their rule not to trust anyone else but just the two of them. The sisters’ journey is to go to Pacific Playland, an amusement park where they thought that there are no zombies there. While the four of day decided to stay together they need to rest and they’ve found the house of Bill Murray. Yes, he portrayed himself as zombie but it’s just make- up so that he would blend with the others. He was accidentally killed by Columbus. They enjoyed the night playing board games and find their selves talking about what they miss when America was not yet infested. Columbus became emotional about his son who also was dead. The next morning the girls left and went to the amusement park. They’ve opened the rides and enjoyed a bit but instead it attracted the zombies. They were trapped at this Blast Off, a ride where it would go vertically up and down but Little Rock was able to shot the main switch where they were stuck mid high while zombies try and get them. The boys followed them. Tallahase made a diversion and locked himself in the game booth while Columbus saves them. Ending the movie as Little Rock throws at him a Twinkie and savored the spongy cake.

There are 49 rules but my favorite is Rule Number 32 Enjoy little things this is what Tallahase’s point all throughout the film. By the way the names where changed so not to attach themselves to each other. It’s also one of the rules. The film is dark, gory but at the same time funny and smart. This is one among my favorite zombie films because of how it’s done differently with someone narrating and understanding the important points of life when it was still normal. It’s simple and no complicated characters that needs to do something. One thing more the introduction is wicked with Metallica’s For Whom the Bell Toils background the zombies. I suggest that you watch this if you are a zombie fan. I am.

Loving Life After Death

2011-08-16T20:35:00.000-07:00

“How did you off yourself?” a question asked by Zia (Patrick Fugit) in the unique film Wristcutters: A Love Story directed by Goran Dukić. The phrase “off yourself” was often said by different characters of the movie because they all committed suicide. It’s an alternate world or where everyone knows as the limbo when someone killed theirselves it’s where they go. They will roam the earth with nowhere else to go but in the movie it’s still the same world except it looks like a setting from a post-apocalyptic location where everything is destroyed and dirty. They are no smiles, no stars, and no light during the night and no colors to the surroundings. All they can see are empty lots, weeds, sand and dust all over.

The story revolves around Zia, a young man who was heartbroken so he cut his wrist and went to this world where others like him would deal with what they did to theirselves. He works at a pizza parlor and one time he met a Russian guy named Eugene (Shea Whigam) at a bar who off himself by pouring beer at his guitar while at a gig and electrocuted himself. They spend their time together often at the bar and got drunk. He got more depressed as he always remembers his ex-girlfriend by which the reason of the suicide transpires. A familiar face at a store talked to him it’s the guy he owes 200 dollars and knows his ex-girlfriend giving him information that she also killed herself. After hearing that she hoped to be finding her and he knows that she’s far away. He called Eugene to a journey that can change at least something for them.

On their way they met Mikal (Shannyn Sossamon), a tourist who was mistakenly transported their as she had an accidental overdose and finding who is in charge of the place. As their journey takes place they’ve met other people that will find what they are looking for. They’ve met Kneller (Tom Waits) by the road as he had fallen asleep finding his dog. They went with him to their camp where strange things happen just like floating people and color changes by people who are there. Zia and Mikal became intimate one night and went to the beach, waking up that it’s where they throw used condoms and syringes.

The dog that he’s looking for was held captive by the King, so they went to sort of a gathering to those who believed him and he saw Desiree (Leslie Bibb), the ex-girlfriend of Zia but it wasn’t her purpose to follow him but because the promise that the Messiah King told him and made her kill herself. While the King was preaching and was about to kill himself when vans and cars arrived taking all the people that was there including Mikal and he told Zia to wait there. Kneller was one of the people in charge. He took Mikal. Kneller gave Zia a chance so he was brought back to life. They were in the same hospital and room when they woke up. Ending the movie smiling to each other.

This is a love story. It’s a love for life and love for people.

The Shed People: Nes

2011-08-03T01:04:00.000-07:00

Real Name: Nescille Mae Domenden

Birthday: October something 1988

Hobbies: Singing, Cooking, Cars, Business, Road Trip, Photography

Music: 80’s music (new wave and rock), pop punk, Taking Back Sunday, Dashboard Confessionals, The Used, Sparta and many more..

Pet: Bozzy( a chow chow), Marvin Roxas (just kidding, the boyfriend)

This girl right here is my soul mate. I’m telling you she is. Anyway let’s start from the beginning of time on how we made history. In October or November of 2004 I met her from another friend called Hope. And we thought there was something between them but just friendship. I met her at the ‘hang out” or our beloved shed. It’s near from the university we used to go to. We became close and we would wait outside each classroom until we got dismissed. After that we would go to the shed and talk, eat, sing, bum, and most all get drunk. Marvin and she were not yet together that time. Nonetheless we’re still close.

There were only 4 girls in the group and the rest are bulls. So we partnered ourselves and I’ve got Nes. We got a lot in common. We always wanted to be alone yet we enjoy ones company. She maybe rich but she doesn’t act like one. We even have to keep a secret on what his father’s work was. Don’t tell, his the Director of Bureau of Fishes and Aquatic Resources. I met her family in 2005. They’re one happy family. Everytime I’d go there they’ll prepare seafood. It was them who conquered my allergies to seafood. We would sing songs together and would do voice blending. The songs we used to sing are Buried Myself Alive by The Used, Dashboard Confessional and Taking Back Sunday Songs. We have our drunken days’ together everyday but we still attend school. She’s a good cook. She used to be part of the repertory. We joke about her moles. One on the lower right of her chin and one on the right arm near the wrist and thumb. She’s sweet. She used to drive the cute Kia Picanto ahhmm technically it was Marvin who’s driving. But she learned how to drive when she was working at IHG. She was already driving a Ford Lynx but they sold it now. I don’t know what car she has now.

I said that she’s my soulmate because we would be wearing the same color of clothes the other day even of we don’t talk about it. If I wear skirt, she will wear one and we don’t know that. There were multiple times that we would be sending text messages both at the same time. Our texts say “I’m just thinking of you.” Now that’s cheesy for two girls’ ayt? We would watch gigs and check out boys that we admire when they’re playing with their bands. We used to have a band as well. She was the vocalist and I am their drummer. It didn’t work out and it was even a cause for us not to talk for months. We missed each other so much. Marvin told me she always say to him that she misses me. I’ll tell you about the others soon. Just like the others I miss her too. She’s my beautiful soulmate.

The Shed People: Jik-Jik

2011-07-30T21:27:00.000-07:00

Full Name: Jake Espiritu
Birthday: January something 1988
Hobbies: Singing, Drinking, Busting Balls, Fixing Computer, Embarrassing me, and others..
Music: Foo Fighters, Mudvayne.. grunge and alternative

The first time I met this person was the year of late 2004. I think that was October or November. It's also the first time I went to the "hang-out" place. That's the shed. We love that place. That's all the greatest memories of friendship begun. It's located near the university that we used to study to.

Where were we? Oh yes the first time I met this guy. My first impression was "what the hell"! I don't like him. He talk too much. He even embarrassed me in front of the others. He was mocking me about my height but look at him. He's short as well. I want to smack him in the face that very moment. Anyway, I didn't like him the first day. The days came and I became to know him. That's his personality. Oh boy! We came close. He was like my boyfriend that time even though he has girlfriend. Well his girlfriend doesn't mind anyway. I'm their "ate", but she didn't call me ate. There is that one time that another friend of ours, that's Mike. Since I don't have a boyfriend they are acting like ones. They even have names for me. I think Jake calls me Gulaman. I can't remember it. He loves Foo Fighters so much coz he looks like him. He always play Everlong in his guitar. No one plays it better than him. His facial hair will grow in just three days. He would shave everyday yet it will grow back immediately. I call him werewolf. We call him a lot of names.. Jewish, Dave Growl, and others just because the hair on his face. By the way we call him "jik-jik" because of how his mother call him. He was crying while watching "Hachicko A Dog Story," yes I was there. One more thing we did go to the same school when he was in prep and I was in grade school. We just checked out the yearbook. Now that's destiny of becoming as friends. He would give me fare everytime I don't have money. He's the most gentleman I've ever met. He would hug me long enough when we don't see each other that much. I would hold his arm everytime we cross road or he would put his hands around me while walking and they thought he's my boyfriend but not. He laughs so loud. He's got the initiative to do things. He's got leadership skills. I love he's cooking. He's speaks like a true American together with Aaron, and Paolo. They become racist and we laugh hard.

Yes he's the one with mic

The first time we went to their house was his birthday. January of 2005. That was one hell of a party. We were so crazy and drunk that we were slamming without a band, just the radio playing and the music was the first album of Paramore. Can you imagine that! He's drunk. We all are. His place where everyone could get drunk and be noisy. His place is where we can act as we are. No pretensions, just the real us. That place was memorable too. I remembered one time that we had this talk and I was crying. He said the nastiest things but they're true and comforting. He's straightforward you know. Everytime I talk to him he tells me something comforting. This is one smart guy. There a lot of things I want to tell you about him. I guess these are just some. I miss talking and keeps busting me everytime we would see each other. I hope he will not read this.

Disconnect! Nuff Said!

2011-07-30T19:29:00.000-07:00

There is one thing I hate the most with people who are holding their cellphones. They are with someone, yet they keep texting or checking facebook and other social media sites. Isn't not better if the communication is real like you can see the reaction and feelings of people in front of you. Texting too much can disconnect you from what you can really see. I just want to suck the lives out of them or cut their heads off! Better yet get their cellphones and stomp it hard until it crushes. I don't mean to be brutal. I just hate people like them. My friends aren't like that, when we spend time together no ones texting except for occasionals if there is someone missing. We sing, we connect with each other not with the cellphone. We really talk a lot. I'll tell you more about them next time. One by one, you'll like them. Come on there is a real world other than texting and chatting. Sometimes you really need to disconnect to appreciate the beauty of what's around you. They're to much engage in what they are seeing on the internet, that it's better you see them real. You use the cellphone so that you can see each other in person. You use the cellphone so that you could be with that someone.

For instance photos of travel, it's nice if you want to check out the place yourself. Ride a bus, feel the wind towards your face. Take photos or write in in your journal. You don't just want you seeing photos in your friend's account right. Go and travel my friend. It's nice to be away from technology sometimes. Meet real people. Not talking about your favorite band in texting. I tell you it's better if you engage in real communication. It feels good. One more texting can lead you not to improve your vocabulary and spelling. I am not against texting. I am against too much texting you forget you are with someone. There's always something better to say than "How are you?" everytime you send a text message. Nuff said!

I am not mad. I am just stating what I have observed. Love more your cellphone than real human being. You should marry your cellphone. Smile everyone!

Dear Letters

2011-07-11T05:57:00.000-07:00

In this world where technology rules, e-mailing, texting, chatting and Facebook is on the top of communication list and writing a letter is so obsolete but for me it's still on. Letters are real and you are able to know the person through their penmanship. It shows their emotions by how their letters change from big to small ones. Letters are an intimate way of showing how you fall in love. It shows how the flow of words as the relationship of the ink and paper synchronizes as your hand works the it's way from the top to the bottom. Sweet words getting through your brain as if you're writing poetry. Try it the Shakespeare way at times but it's better if you can write whatever you feel in simple and direct way. Letters were sent to Simone de Beauvoir by Jean-Paul Sartre were romantic and honest. He sends letter to her twice a week. His letters show his tender side and how he depends his life to her. How about the letters of Jane Austen to her sister Cassandra Austen on what's happening to her and their family in the country describes what life she's having.

Never forget the traditional way of keeping in touch. It lets you become creative and spontaneous. I've kept those small notes that my classmates gave me when I was in highschool. I've kept those letters my aunt set me when were still using snail mail just to know how they are in Spain. She describes the country as I let my imagination works. I would rather have letters as a gift to me other than material things. I'd rather have those words in a piece of paper and memorize what's written in it and I'll recite it. I'd rather keep those letters in treasure box and let my children read it. I love to write letters in books and in small papers.

Letters are among the most significant memorial a person can leave behind them.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

To send a letter is a good way to go somewhere without moving anything but your heart. ~Phyllis Theroux

Versions and More Versions

2011-07-03T07:31:00.000-07:00

Soundtrack for today: Meg and Dia
Album: Here, Here and Here

Today was listening to cover versions of different artists day. It was fun listening to them as "Use Somebody" by Kings of Leon and "Heartless" by Kanye West are now my two favorite cover songs from different artists. They have their own versions of the songs that make it haunting and emotional.

Let's start with "Use Somebody" by Kings of Leon. My favorite lines are "I'm been roaming around, I was looking down and all I see, painted faces fill the places I can't reach.” This song is about being alone and how the loneliness takes over one person and needing for someone just to feel the emptiness. You can feel the vocalist loneliness as he sang it.

You know that I could use somebody, you know that I can use somebody." It's a sad song that catches everybody's attention. The first version that I've heard of this song was from Paramore. Their version was done in an acoustic way in the poppy voice of Haley Williams, then the version of Bat For Lashes. She’s an English musician. She used her own unique way in interpreting this song. She played the organ with her eerily and soft voice makes you goose bumps. She’s like a singing ghost but you just want her to finish the song. Pixie Lott’s cover was also in acoustic but with a diva vibe. She used strong and higher notes. She’s also an English singer. Laura Jansen sung it in a sad way with her indie roots while playing the piano makes you want to cry. Her voice is beautiful and sad when she sang it. Now my favorite version of the song was performed by Matisyahu. A jewish reggae singer, beat boxer and rapper. He sang it smoothly but you can still hear his reggae-ish way as he beat box at the end. I also like the version of Bat For Lashes because it’s like air that’s passing to my body. There is still a bunch of cover of this song. These are just some.

The next song is called “Heartless” by Kanye West. I am not a fan of Kanye West but when I saw the video and the lyrics. I like it, no I love the song. It’s a heartbreaking song about a girl who doesn’t give a damn about the feeling of this guy. My favorite lines: “In the night I hear ‘em talk, the coldest story ever told, somewhere far along this road, he lost his soul, to a woman so heartless. How could you be heartless.”

The Fray’s version of the song is nice. It’s as if the vocals are crying. You can feel the emotions in every word. Their version of the video is far better than Kanye West, no offense to him. William Fitzsimmons cover is more smooth and slow like the voice of Iron and Wine, in an indie way. He’s an American singer-songwriter. How about an aggressive version of the song which was covered by the band The Word Alive? It’s from a compilation of Punk Goes Pop. There are more screaming, screeching of guitars and double pedal drums. Their version is in a fast pace. People who listen to aggressive music may want to check this out and you can bang your head off. Rock on! An American Idol version which was rendered by Kris Allen made it into pop rock. It’s melodic and clear as he sang it. My favorite version is from Dia Frampton who’s the other half of Meg and Dia. She used this song in a competition. She also played the piano while her unique, soft and edgy voice makes the song have its own soul. I play it over and over. I play her version everyday. I just so love her own version.

Just go and listen to good, quality songs and it feels good to have these artists rendering their own interpretations and makes the original version appreciated.

Isn't It Good Norwegian Wood?

2011-06-30T07:31:00.000-07:00

Haruki Murakami’s Norwegian Wood is one depressive yet interestingly drawn book as you finish the last ten pages. The rainy days come with the sadness as the setting changes from the city of Tokyo to other parts of Japan’s provinces, mountains, meadow, seaside and other cities.

Suicide made the story eerily connected to each of the character. It’s a recurring event in the book. The first person perspective of once a teenage boy recalls how the complicated love she has for this girl she once knew but lost herself as the loss of their friend who killed himself changed everything on what has been on their relationships. They were once a trio but when death took one of them different relationships was created.

Toru isolated himself yet he went to college just like any normal boys. Naoko, wasn’t able to accept the death of Kizuki, who was once the love of her life. Toru loved Naoko from the beginning, even though he knows she will never return his love. Naoko decided to turn back from the outside world. She went to a sanitarium, where she tries to heal herself but she couldn’t. Toru promised to wait for her. He promised that she will not be forgotten and he could not forget her. Toru’s patience had led him to meet another girl from his school. Midori’s funny, liberated, optimistic, independent outlook in life made him addicted to her but not in a sexual way. They’ve grown to be comfortable with each other.

Naoko was slowly drowning into her own world. He never lose hope. They wrote each other letters about what they did that week. He visited her a few times as she and her quirky, musician roommate showed him to what they’ve embraced as their home.

He continued to see Midori when he went back home. From the very first time they’ve met she said that she really liked him. He likes her as well. He knows he’s falling in love with her but he will keep his promise until the end. Midori made her realize that she’s real, breathing girl in front of him.

One last letter came and it’s the suicide of Naoko. He was deeply crushed that he let himself travel around Japan and sleep anywhere and when he came back he’s ready to love the one girl who’s in front of him. Her name is Midori. Yet he’s still kept his memory of Naoko and thus this book was for her. She keeps insisting to never forget her because she knows that she will be forgotten after her death. She planned it after Kizuki’s death.

This is a story of an undying love, a longing for someone that is impossible to reach.

Erased Memories

2011-06-27T21:46:00.000-07:00

Man fictionalizes inventions in some movies in an exaggerated way but I hope they’re real. Let’s take a look at the film, “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.” A machine was used to remove any memories of a person who you used to be with and be in love with. The purpose is to eliminate the pain that was being felt by the person by removing everything you used to know about the person. It’s nice to have and remove bitterness, anger and sadness towards the past. It let you move on. Create a new life, be happy and do whatever you are supposed to do.

In life, you meet a person once in a while and you expect too much. You plan ahead, but planning does not help. It does not work. Both of you did not work out but with the relationship not working out. It will create a new one and this time you know exactly what you will do. It’s either you build that relationship with that same person or a new one. This machine is unnecessary for people who are born have “fight or flight” mechanism. They can easily heal. Since this machine does not exist it’s either the person walks away or decides to stay. Once you walk way, don’t turn back and if you see that person years from now, then you know it’s another beginning.

Live Curious

2011-06-10T21:34:00.000-07:00

National Geographic Channel’s tagline “Live Curious,” is amazingly influential to people who lives without boundaries. People who just want to get lost and be surprised by what they are going to find out. People who enjoy adrenaline rush. Those people who loves life. Those people who wants to discover. Those people who cares and saves.

If I were to have that shirt and have the chance to be interviewed, I would like to talk about how words were developed. How people started to write. Words can be expressed written and orally. Words can communicate even in far away places. Words are expressed in different languages. Language identifies a culture. Language drives a culture to be recognized.

The Sumerians contributed a very important form of writing. It’s called the cuneiform. These kinds of writing were found in their granaries, and clay tablets. Some were deciphered as dates, events and places. They were the first civilization to ever write an epic which was entitled “The Gilgamish Epic.”

Words were created to have communication and understanding towards mankind.

The Rise of the Roman Empire

2011-06-05T22:06:00.000-07:00

I am trying to write about the Roman Empire but I don’t know which topic to write about Augustus Ceasar played a big role in establishing the Roman Empire. The empire’s unity and strength can be seen on how they were lead.

Augustus Caesar wanted Rome in peace and so reformation was made by him. The period was called Pax Romana or Roman Peace. Augustus wanted Rome in peace and prosperity. The reformation included abolishing corruption in provinces by appointing legates. He administered services for the civilians. The Roman Empire strengthened because of how a leader should unite, disciplined each soldier.

He set hardwork, loyalty, patriotism and simplicity as examples toward his people. Augustus Caesar was the reason for the rise of the Roman Empire.

For the past few days I’ve been reading world history, while waiting for a job. I don’t know if it would bore you but it’s an adventure for me. Try recreating how the French Revolution happened. It seems like a war epic movie isn’t? How about the invention of the guillotine? Would you agree with this type of punishment to those who are criminals before? The trial of the witches where all of them are not witches.

History is not boring if you have an imaginative mind. It makes you creative and knowledgeable about what happened in the past. You may never know “history might repeat itself.”

The Feeling of Denial

2011-05-26T20:17:00.001-07:00

You thought there is that one person who would be proud of you and tells the world how much you love her and how much you want to stay with her but eventually he's the first one to deny. Deny the love in the relationship. Denying each other is as much as nothing. Denying the presence of the other means it's not love at all.

The feeling of denial is anger, frustrations and changes toward the other. The relationship is purely lust and not love at all. Denial is just love for the self and not for each other. Denial is not accepting the other. Denial is pretentious and love does not grow. Denial is using each other instead of helping each other. the feeling of denial is a pain inside waiting to burst because it hurts more than being stabbed. It's a betrayal. The person is a traitor and just thinking of what's good for him. What if you are being denied not just once but many times? Would you still accept him? Would you still forgive him?

The Dark Days Have Returned

2011-04-06T06:20:00.000-07:00

When you feel everything's alright on the outside. It does not feel right on the inside It separates you from yourself. It worries you much. It worries you of everything around you. It worries you of people who are close to you. It does not feel right at all. You think people can change the way you feel when you are not yourself anymore. You feel scared of nothing. You feel sad of nothing. You feel angry of nothing. It just stays there.

Why can't you just go away and leave me. Please let me be happy. For once, one important person is willing to fight you. He will defeat you and you'll be forever be gone. I know he's inside me. He will continue the battle within me.

You are now half the shadow that I've met long ago. A shadow that's been trying to kill me over and over and over. When that day comes that you'll be defeated. Everything's going to be normal for me and to everyone else around me.

The days are turning dark again but I can still see the light. You just appear out of nowhere, then suddenly you change me but now I can fight you with that special person's help. I'll be back soon and that, I am sure of.

When Senses Fail

2011-03-30T09:25:00.000-07:00

The senses are used in order to understand what one sees, hear, smell, taste and feel. Yet if senses are just merely for tangible things then it just limits what the person wants to know. It limits them of what is really needed to feel, see, hear, taste and feel. For instance the sense of sight is just for the use of seeing what is around. How about using the eyes as for perceiving what the object really is, or what is beyond that object. How was it made? What materials did they use to that object. It doesn't mean that if you see a plate it limits to just one shape, color or even its use. Plates can be used for putting food on it, can be a collection to hobbyist or it can just be displayed. The senses are used for multi-purpose tasks. They can be used simultaneously. Senses will help you realize that there is beyond everything else either tangible or intangible.

It maybe sometimes that senses can make mistakes such as what you saw made you conclude that it is what you really saw. Sometimes senses fail to inform you about what is around you. It fails to give you the idea of what you want to know instead it just gives you empirical and not quantitative. Senses is about what's in front of you. It's better if senses and beyond senses can be used.

The Rain Songs

2011-03-28T11:07:00.000-07:00

I miss the rain. I miss how it falls on my head as I walk home alone. I miss how frogs croak altogether and just stare at their peeking cute heads on the pond. As young girl before I remembered how the frogs sing together when it rain for days. There's plenty of them but now I can't even hear one.

The rain reminded me of old friends getting our clothes wet just walking by the road while other people seek shelter. They were avoiding the rain while we were enjoying it. Our clothes are wet yet we were enjoying ones company

The rain reminds me of the house sitting we did years ago. I can smell the barbecue being prepared by the terrace after the strong rain. We were just waiting and watching movies day and night.

The rain reminds me of happy, catchy songs that makes my heart happy and full of life. Today it rained. It made me remember things and also makes me what to do this things again with someone important and special to me.

Hello Summer Finn!

2011-03-12T00:55:00.000-08:00

I checked out some of my journals for the past 2 years and I found something that I would like to share with my blog. It's about my comfort movie, 500 Days of Summer. I love Zooey Deschanel so much. Here's how the journal goes. "This is a story of a boy meets girl but you should know upfront this is not a love story."

"Everytime I feel sad I think about a lot of things so that my mind will not be occupied by my downed emotions. I would love to do things that would not make me sad. Writing is number one on my list, but the most common thing that a girl does is to eat and I do that sometimes, then watch movies that are sad, romantic movies and if not sad let's say animal flicks. First on my list is 500 Days of Summer.

I can see the reality on Summer Finn. I see how she fell in love and denied it. She knew she was in love. She's just not sure enough. Summer is fun to be with. She's smart. She's everything a guy wants, but the problem was she never found it with Tom Hansen. She wasn't sure about him. He got bored of him, so she cut of everything with him and just be friends. He doesn't want to be friends with her. He needs to forget her, but he wasn't able to do that. He's still expecting that she would return. She got enganged and that is the start of the changes he wants for his life. He quit his job as a greeting card writer and pursued what he took in college, architecture. He read and reviewed architecture. He passed his works to different companies but he was rejected. He did not lose hope, until he and Summer met again at his favorite park. She's married. This is the part I got sad.

They talked for the last time. Exchanging goodbyes, hopong for the best and happiness for each other. Reality check for him he thought she was the girl for him, but maybe there is someone waiting to be known and that is how the movie ended. She met Autumn, his competition in applying the same job.

When I reflect on the film, I realized that you can cut my hair anytime and eventually it will grow back. You will meet people and some will go. They may return or they may not. Chances are there is that one person out there that's waiting to be found and waiting to be known."

That's how the journal goes and 500 Days of Summer is still and always be my comfort movie. Summer did not believed in love at first maybe because it's not him that made her realize that love really exist. Just like what Summer said to Tom, I'll just paraphrase it. " It just happened. I woke up one day and I knew.. what I was never sure of with you. . I was sitting at a deli reading Dorian Gray. I guy comes out to me and asked me about it. Now he's my husband. So what if I've gone to the movies or gone somewhere else for lunch. What if I've got there 10 minutes later. It was meant to be. I just kept thinking Tom was right.."