Raptor Inc.

The Language of College Professors

2014-08-06T19:59:00.002-04:00

I've found that every professor at school seems to speak in their own unique language. I'm not sure if it's that all History teachers sound like History teachers and all Science teachers sound like nerds or something but every single one of my teachers is their own unique butterfly when it comes to communication.

One of my teachers in particular has a style that makes it virtually impossible to focus on, it's about the same pace as a snail on crutches with the same intonation as a sleepy washing machine and while you're listening all you can think of is, "there's not enough coffee for this conversation." That being said, that style has almost become a challenge for me and I impart this advice on anyone who is having trouble understanding one of their teachers; make a game out of it. Trying to decipher what the teacher is actually talking about has become an exercise for me, it's like being a detective during the interrogation of a murder suspect or watching a movie where the audience knows who the killer is but the rest of the characters don't and you're picking up on the subtle hints that could give him away if only the stupid characters in the show knew what to look for (10 points to whoever can guess the name of that literary device.)

So while the rest of the class passes out and creates small flood planes with their collective drool I'm picking apart mysteries and being the scholarly detective of Baker Street and you should be too.

Don't be one of those guys.

Yaaaay Art School

2014-07-30T22:50:00.000-04:00

So I'm in college now and I made this comic because I haven't made one in a while and I need a good reference level for my artistic skill as it develops through the magic of MS Paint and programs beyond. I'm in for Media Arts & Animation at the lovely Art Institute of Jacksonville. Now if I can only get some part-time work going so I don't go broke while trying to edumacate myself...

Comic: Unemployment

2014-04-06T12:20:00.000-04:00

So we're approaching the one year anniversary of anything being posted on this blog. What's happened in this year long span? Well Darris has disappeared, Dillon started online college, Ryan bought some Gundam models, and that Amber chick... well let's not go there due to legal reasons. Me? Well I was using my job as an excuse to do nothing but play video games and sleep a bunch. WELL NOT ANYMORE! I got laid off. Yes, I'm part of that percentage now. Anyway, I like this blog and I like writing and drawing crappy MS Paint comics and crap for it so I'm gonna do that now. Anything else that happens, happens.

Impulse Buying While Depressed

2013-04-11T16:02:00.001-04:00

Have you ever bought anything on impulse while you were depressed? I have. In fact it seems as my mood goes down excess crap goes up. I find there is a sudden rush as the transaction completes, an injection of relief from the sinking sadness as I open the package, hope that beams from the prospect of a fresh purchase. But oh, how quickly that euphoria fades. I find myself with shelves of unread art books and classics I’ve always wanted to read and felt that I could somehow assimilate into myself through touch and ownership. I have a sushi making kit I never use and boxes of craft odds and ends, stacks of unplayed games, and reams of forgotten sheet music I swore to myself I would learn; and I always have every intention of keeping that promise. When you’re down and looking for a ladder to pull yourself back up to feeling okay again, you’ll promise anything if you can just find that first rung and start the climb. Somehow I never quite make it to the top. I’ve heard stories of people who have made it, burnt themselves out by knitting a dozen Afghans or baked enough croissants to feed a Boy Scout troop, but I never get there. I always make it past the first step, the “beginner” phase before the drive peters out and I’m back where I began at the bottom of the ladder. Such is my life. I can talk about everything from how to build Tryndamere in League of Legends to the importance of sanding every part of a ukulele body except where the neck will be glued at the top. But I can’t stop the cycle. It’s why this blog seems to get going in spurts before falling dormant again until the next creative explosion.

I was surprised to learn that my behavior could be described as self-medicating and I’m not the only one who does it. Wikipedia describes this as: “a human behavior in which an individual uses unprescribed drugs to treat untreated and often undiagnosed medical ailments.” Impulse buying can become an addiction and I’m never truly proud of myself when it’s all said and done. I think about how much I could have had saved if I could have controlled myself a little better, and if you can’t do something without regretting yet find yourself continuing to do it it’s never a good sign. Self-medication doesn’t have to be limited to drug use; it could be any negative behavior you use to find relief. Wikipedia goes on to say: “The psychology of such behavior within the specific context of using recreational drugs, psychoactive drugs, alcohol, and other self-soothing forms of behavior to alleviate symptoms of mental distress, stress and anxiety. including mental illnesses and/or psychological trauma, is particularly unique and can serve as a serious detriment to physical and mental health if motivated by addictive mechanisms.” And then sums up with: “Self-medication is often seen as gaining personal independence from established medicine.” Lol.

So how does someone like me get better? It’s not as easy as my father would say, “just stop doing it. You know you’re doing it so stop.” If I could do than it wouldn’t be a problem. Some people have suggested hiding your credit card and only working with cash but in this day and age where websites save your payment information and plastic prevents you from losing loads of dosh or having it stolen from your wallet that’s not really an option. You could always try REAL medication but the thought of that is usually more depressing than where you are currently at. What I have found to be a reasonable solution is to make a list of things you want, call it your wish list, Santa Letter, whatever. Put on this list a bunch of things you wish you had, materials for hobbies you wish you could learn or a movie you wish you had seen or a book you’ve always wanted to read, maybe put ‘lessons’ on there instead of material goods so you can actually get some more motivation to complete your goal. In fact, if you’re going to go with lessons or a hobby another good way to stick to it is to tell someone you trust to ride your ass till it’s done. Guilt trips are marvelous. But anyway, when you feel yourself sinking and you need to scratch that itch, go to your wish list. Always put small things on this list, budget items you know you want and you know you can get that release from acquiring; think thrift stores and eBay. That way you can get your fix and still have enough cash left over to pay the light note. No, it’s not a perfect solution but there seldom is in life and all its whimsical little struggles.

I’m going to try to keep the blog going this time, an article a week is my goal with a little bit of comic mischief in the mix. Don’t expect Penny Arcade quality, I’m working with what I got over here. As for the rest of the crew: Darris is dealing with possible homelessness so he’s a bit tied up at the moment trying to save up or move, Ryan is split between saying he’s going to study for his A+ certification and buying a million video games he’ll never play (irony), saying Dillon will commit to anything is like rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic, and Auverin is so bogged down with college work it’s a wonder the pressure hasn’t turned her into a tiny diamond Auvey. I’m in a perpetual rift caused by my love of music, art, and writing with the bane of video games always snapping the life away from me with its instant gratification and sweet graphics. But I’m gonna try. I know it seems like I’m not always successful, but I’m still gonna try.

Wood Elves are Closet Cannibals

2013-01-24T23:03:00.001-05:00

Oh, the beloved elf.

I must admit that I am very partial to elven races in pretty much any game I play. So it’s only logical that I produce an article about them, right?

Elf characters are definitely not suited for everyone. If you’re looking to hack and slash your way through a game with as much blood and as many execution kills as possible, I would suggest you choose a different race. But you know that already, don’t you?

Let’s talk about the elf race in general for a minute. Now, when I say elf race, I am thinking of wood elves. Dark elves, high elves, moon elves, and the like are another beast entirely. Keeping that in mind, it’s safe to say that no matter what game you’re playing (or what movie/book you are watching/reading), you can expect certain things out of the them. They’re generally described in the same manner across the board: shorter than other races, pointy ears, blonde to copper hair, green/brown/hazel eyes. All that good stuff. They’re people deeply rooted in the land, and they dress and act accordingly. Simple clothes, armor/weapons made from natural material, you get the picture. Because of their land (or tree) dwelling lifestyle and generally smaller stature, they’re very nimble. Elves are known for their agility and stealth skills, making them a good choice for those who prefer a sneak-and-snipe style of gameplay.

Look at those..that dagger. Yeah, the dagger.

What else are the elves known for? That’s right...archery! Almost every elven race you encounter, no matter what the game, is guaranteed to excel in the marksman skill set. And their affinity for bows isn’t arbitrary; it’s a natural choice for their race because of their sneaking ability and their connection to the land. (I imagine it’s a damn hard thing to make a useful sword out of wood or animal bone, but you can make a hell of a bow out of a tree branch or deer rib if you’ve got the skill.) Besides, most elven races rely on wild game as a primary source of food. And unless you’re wuld nah kest-ing your way through a hunting area, you’re not going to bring that elk down with a longsword.

All that said, you can probably guess how skills are broken up with elven races. Dexterity is the big one. I’ve never encountered a wood elf class that doesn’t have some bonus to dexterity/agility. Speed is up there too. Elves are quick little shits, because they have to be to make up for their general lack of strength and endurance somehow. I’ve seen some games give elven races a boost to intelligence or magic skills. (This is usually truer for dark or high elves than wood elves, but it does happen.) The only purpose I could see for giving a wood elf those perks would be for healing/restoration magic. (Unless we’re looking at Dragon Age, which I’ll get to.) You’ll also see perks in areas like marksmanship, light armor, alchemy/herbalism, short (or one handed) weapons, sneak, dual-wielding, and the like. Some games (read: TES), include other perks like poison/disease resistance, special abilities with animals, and so on. Put all that together, and you’ve got a good foundation to build a ranger, rogue, or scout character. But watch out...elves are seriously lacking in terms of strength/endurance/constitution. If you get unnerved by a low health bar, buck up, become an orc, and wield a warhammer instead.

Unless he shoots that bear square in the mouth, this isn't going to be a pretty fight.

So there is the wood elf stereotype, if you will. And really, the stereotype doesn’t just apply to their character builds. You can also see it in the lore behind the characters. Games across the board put certain key elements into wood elf lore and culture. First off, they are almost always discriminated against. The Dragon Age series is probably the best example of this. The elves are enslaved or kept in alienages inside the city walls, where they live in poverty. They’re essentially second-class citizens. Same goes for the Elder Scrolls series. Although it’s not as blatantly obvious, elves can run into some serious discrimination in cities. This is particularly true in Skyrim, but one must also consider that the Nords hate just about everyone. Still, there has not yet been an Elder Scrolls game that takes place in the wood elven homeland, so you’re pretty much stuck being a foreigner no matter what. (TES III: Morrowind does take place in the native land of the Dark Elves, but they're not the ones we're concerned with.) Those big pointy ears don’t help you blend in, either.

The Elven Alienage in all its..erm...splendor.

Wood elves also lend themselves to a pretty rich history if you do some digging. A lot of games (I’m specifically looking at TES and Dragon Age, because they have strong elf lore, but you can find it in other games as well. Forgotten Realms has an interesting and detailed elven history.) Usually, the elven history has a lot to do with the elves being somewhat reclusive, and contact with other races usually doesn’t go well. Take the Dragon Age Dalish, for example. Their tribes have little contact with humans, and what contact does occur usually does not end well. (See: every city elf in Thedas.) In Tamriel, the Valenwood Bosmer get involved in lots of conflicts with many different factions, including armies from Cyrodiil and Elsewyr.

Tribal Dalish. Good stuff.

In addition to that, the wood elves are usually pretty spiritual. I’m gonna refer you to Elder Scrolls on this one, because frankly I find it fascinating and I don’t care if it’s a little irrelevant. Most wood elf races have a deep connection to the land and the gods that guard it. If I may refer you to the Green Pact in Elder Scrolls lore…the Bosmer made a pact with the forest god Y’ffre that they would not harm any of the vegetation in their homeland. So they rely on rock and imported timber for building supplies. Weapons and armor are made from animal bone and hide. But that’s not the best part. Because of the pact, the Bosmer are almost strictly carnivorous. But they don’t just eat wild game. They eat the enemies they kill in combat. A Bosmer warrior is expected to eat his fallen enemy within three days. If he so chooses, his family can help. Wood elves = cannibals. Who knew they were so intense?

Valenwood concept art for The Elder Scrolls Online.

But I’m not just here to blabber on about the elves as seen in games. I love the race. I really do. So I wondered where they came from and how they came to be portrayed as they are today. Elves sprung up in Germanic mythology/folklore. They first popped up in Old English and Old Norse texts, and they’re highly popular in both British and Scandinavian folklore. They were originally fairly ambivalent creatures. They could help or hinder humans with their magical abilities as they so chose. But as time went on, they became more and more sinister.

Old school elves were not very attractive.

The origin of the word elf is Old English (aelf). It’s believed this comes from an even older word (albiz) that means “white.” Elves appeared in many mythological stories all over Europe and the British Isles. They were generally sneaky and mischievous creatures, although sometimes portrayed in a positive light. Usually, they were kept away from. They went from mythology into fantasy fiction around the 20^th century, after the Brothers Grimm and a few others collected folklore/fairytales and retold them to a general audience. The prominence of elves in fantasy fiction was cemented in the early 1900s with the release of two novels: The King of Elfland’s Daughter (Lord Dunsany) and The Hobbit (J.R.R. Tolkien). That’s right friends, we have Mr. Tolkien to thank for the elves we know and love today. Elves were central to his Middle-Earth mythology (especially in The Silmarillion). Because his books earned such a large fanbase, the elf reemerged into modern popular culture. Elves and elven language began to emerge in all sorts of books, movies, and role playing games. The Tolkien fantasy elf was particularly popularized by Dungeons & Dragons, in which they were portrayed as being not only more beautiful than mortals, but also wiser, more perceptive, and with sharper senses. They were said to be skilled archers who were also proficient in magic and loved nature, art, and music. And thus the modern elf was born.

I would punch a baby for that perfect elven skin.

If you’ve never played an elven character before, I highly suggest that you try it at least once. If nothing else, it’s research, right? And besides, who can complain about being short, beautiful, and deadly?

You can't say they're not beautiful. Come on.

Pick your bows up, Bosmers. Mischief awaits.

Comic: Reclamation of Relationship

2012-11-14T11:41:00.000-05:00

Almost based on a true story. I'm sure there are plenty of girls out there who can relate when a new game comes out. Needless to say, she was relieved when it was over. Little does she know, multiplayer lives on...

Halo 4: A Desperate Quest to Save Your Digital Girlfriend

2012-11-13T13:41:00.000-05:00

"I won't let that happen."

"And if it happens anyway?"

Since Halo's first installment in 2001, Master Chief has been portrayed as an unstoppable force of nature on the battlefield of the future. He can obliterate entire battalions of advanced interstellar life with his bare hands, survive a fall from orbit, and inspire the forces of Earth with his presence alone. Yet for all that, for the very first time in his decade spanning career, we see a side of Chief that no universe threatening alien, cosmic death ray, or physical wound could produce.We see him question what he is. We see him falter. We see the man behind the helmet. And I will not tell you why.

Get ready for answers.

Selfish? Perhaps. But the story line of Halo 4, particularly its ending, is the best out of all the games in the series and I will not ruin it for anyone who plans to play it and I certainly recommend any fan of FPS or science fiction do. 343 did an amazing job taking over for Bungie and the story they deliver is mature, entertaining, and much less cryptic than previous installments.

"And that cloud looks like a space ship!"
"Shut up, Cortana, you're drunk."

After an unexpected cinematic featuring Dr. Halsey, the creator of the Spartans, that hints at the mental health of her Spartans (it was at this point I knew things would get interesting as the actual psychological aspect of the super soldiers has never been touched in the games before) we begin where the third game left off; Chief is awakened by Cortana inside the disabled UNSC frigate Forward Onto Dawn that has drifted toward an unidentified alien planet. After realizing the ship has been boarded by Covenant we enter a firefight that spans throughout the ship and on to the hull, ending in a climactic battle through open space and the shattered remains of an alien cruiser. You are then sucked through a gravity well and land on the alien planet's surface.

One of these things is not like the other, one of these things is a digital representation of an
assimilated ancient human.

Welcome to Requiem, an ancient forerunner planet and the settting for most of the game. You will battle through canyons, valleys, jungles, and massive alien structures on your quest to find the advanced UNSC ship Infinity that has approached the planet on the tail of Forward Onto Dawn's distress beacon. The three major plot points of the story come up at this point: the forerunner antagonist called the Didact whom you unwittingly release from prison (and who's true motive I won't spoil here), the new batch of Spartans on board the Infinity led by a real prick of a Captain you'll continuously butt heads with, and the fact that Cortana is rapidly thinking herself to death inside of your head.

Prepare yourself for feels.

Cortana, as an AI, has a lifespan of about 7 years. It has been 8 since her creation. The condition she is facing, called rampancy, causes her to break down into conflicting copies of herself like insane digital schizophrenia. Her condition steadily worsens as the game progresses; she argues with the conflicting personalities that are created as she breaks down, struggles to maintain her composure as she hacks enemy computer systems, and even disrupts your internal computers and display as she struggles to hold it together. Master Chief, being the relentless totem of bad ass that he is, refuses to acknowledge Cortana's failing health and continuously tells her that she will be fine and that he will get her back to Dr. Halsey (who created Cortana from her own nuero-tissue) and save her from herself.

Leave it to DeviantArt to find this image.

Cortana's deteriorating condition is the driving force of the narrative. She has been your trusty blue companion throughout the entire series and hearing her scream in agony as her very essence is ripped to shreds is gripping, as is the Chief's determination to save her. In the second act it becomes all too apparent how much you rely on her to survive on the battlefield as her abilities to navigate the terrain, manipulate technology, and coordinate allied forces are compromised. It's this arc that keeps me thinking about the game and it's powerful conclusion after I completed the campaign. It's what's got me excited about this new addition and what it means for future installments. The story exquisitely handles the relationship between Chief and Cortana, from it's borderline romantics, to its grand design as the fruition of all mankind's effort and evolution.

The Mammoth is so friggin' awesome.

As far as the mechanics go, the game is tight and challenging. The new breed of enemies, the Prometheans, are coordinated and challenging. There are several noteworthy moments like manning a giant land carrier called the Mammoth and making your way through a massive valley with acidic rivers and a spaceship shattering rail gun to piloting a fighter through a trench on the Didact's ship in a scene that will have Star Wars fans creaming their pants. The game really picks up in the second half and expect to encounter a lot of mechanics that exist in just a single level and never to be seen again which keeps the game fresh and interesting. You will also notice a lot of the redundant level design that was heavy in the previous games is missing. Don't expect much in the way of weapon innovation, all the staples are there and going nowhere (although rockets no longer lock on and there are mechs.)

Being able to shoot while holding the flag is a welcome addition.

Multiplayer is back with a new Spartan Hub interface which allows you to customize load outs and buy perks similar to the Call of Duty franchise and is so big it requires a second disk that needs to be installed on your HDD to play or downloaded from Xbox Live. There are ton of armor customization options this time around, some you unlock just by leveling up and others that require specific challenges to be met, like running over 50 guys with with a Warthog. All the familiar modes are there, Juggernaught (Regicide), Zombies (Flood), Capture the Flag, SWAT, and Big Team Slayer to name a few though I'm still waiting on them to add multi-team so I can get back to Rocket Race. Firefight has been replaced by Spartan Ops which is a separate campaign that is released as episodic content and features your custom-made Spartan as a member of Crimson company that is composed of you and your buddies or match-made players and trust me, after playing it you won't miss Firefight at all.

Who needed giant robots? Halo needed giant robots.

As a Halo fan I was not disappointed. 343 did an amazing job and they make a point to thank the fans for allowing them this chance to take Halo in a new direction as evident in the credits and the first pop up message that appears when you boot up the game. The music, graphics, voices, and game play all exceed expectations and had me hooked in a way video games haven't for a very long time. So go buy it and suit up, Spartan! Those alien bastards aint gonna teabag themselves!

Comic: Social Enmity

2012-11-09T11:13:00.000-05:00

It doesn't happen as often as it used to but when I get hooked on a game, I get hooked. Nothing and no one can separate me from new-found digital asylum in which I have become more than flesh and transcended into the realm of absolute being that my brain tells me is inside my Xbox.

This emotion will develop from the initial "I can quit anytime" emotion to "Why would I want to do anything else?" phase to the climactic "CONTROLLER AND I HAVE BECOME ONE" and then finally to "I should read a book."

It's a vicious wave that must be ridden to completion lest suffer a nervous breakdown but it is one that I have grown accustomed to. If any of you have ever felt similar physical reactions, please do relate in the comments.

The Origin of 5 of Your Favorite Fantasy Monsters

2012-11-07T13:18:00.000-05:00

Mr. Dwarf has seen better days

They're the standard level 1 bad guys in fantasy video games, they're the creepy little buggers climbing walls and hissing menacingly from behind jagged teeth in movies of swords and shields, and they're so entrenched in fantasy literature it's hard to find a book that doesn't mention them directly or whatever the author chooses to call them in his or her attempt at being original, even though we all know the truth. Imps, goblins, ogres, trolls. They're the staple monsters in our favorite pop culture fantasy and folk tales and I'm going to tell you where they came from and why we perceive them as the nasty things they are.

Friendly enough.

1. Imps
Starting with the smallest, smelliest, and most irritating of the common fantasy monsters we have the Imp. Mostly known for being mischievous rather than harmful, these little demons are more aggravating than a than a fresh zit that you can't quite pop yet but you know it's there and it hurts like a son of a bitch. You will notice that the ratio of annoying increases in parallel with size.

Just waterin' my imps.

Origin
Imps are a type of demon and entirely German in origin. It should be noted that not all demons in German folklore are malevolent but imps were definitely bastards. They are typically described as the opposite of fairies, who are fun loving and free; imps are wild and general dick faces that liked to switch babies and lead travelers astray because they thought it was HILARIOUS like a college room mate who thinks taking a dump on your pillow is the best thing ever.

Tiny picture is tiny.

Pop Culture
Imps are found to be witch's familiars and irksome little tricksters all throughout the spectrum of pop culture. Sometimes they fly, most times they don't, and they really just like to shit all over everything. Imps are like headcrabs or pubic lice crabs or any kind of crab in general, creepy and slightly salty. They are often hidden in architecture to provide a kind of whimsy and are associated with general mischief like in Robert Louis Stevenson's 1891 story The Bottle Imp about an imp trapped in a bottle that would grant the owner their every wish, as long as the owner sold the bottle to someone else before their death or face burning in hell fire for all eternity.

I smell man flesh

2. Goblins
They're the small, irritating, and sometimes magical critters you see as the lowest echelon of the fantasy bad guy society. They're a bit bigger than imps and far more common, these guys are ugly, on the front lines, usually dumb, and unquestionably dastardly.

True story.

Origin
Although the exact origin is not known, the word goblin most likely comes from either the Old French word gobelin, the Germanic kobold, Midevil Latin cabalus, or Greek kobalos which means "rouge." Another theory is that it is a derivative of the proper name Gobel which only suggests that no one in ancient times thought a Gobel wasn't a douche. In folklore they appear in the texts of Scandinavia, Germany, Great Britain, Ireland, United States, India, Japan and South Korea and their description hardly changes across the board.

Standard issue.

Pop Culture
Goblins are everywhere from from classic poetry to Magic: The Gathering. The orcs in Tolkein mythology are referred to as goblins and they can be found in everything from Harry Potter to the Elder Scrolls series to one of the best side-scrollers of all time, Ghosts N Goblins. The list of formats these creatures have crawled their way into is so exhaustive you would have lie down just from thinking about it for too long so I wont even try to get too far into it. Basically, start walking in one direction in the fantasy genre and you're bound to trip over one of these suckers eventually. They have even been attributed to physical locations like Goblin Bay in Ontario Canada and Goblin Combe in Somerset, U.K

Passion for fashion

3. Ogres
They're the big nasty buggers you see eating children and getting on the road again with their donkey sidekick. They are a step up from the goblins with their size and ferocity and appetite for human flesh. They are also a step down in general annoying-ness, with the exception of said donkey counterpart.

At least that's not terrifying

Origin
The word ogre is of French origin which may refer to the inhabitants of Britain prior to human settlement or the word Hongrois which means Hungarian as most western folks thought they were all bunch of jerks and deserved to be put in the same etymological category as flesh eating monsters. It is very interesting to note that trolls and ogres may have been based on the Neanderthals, who lived in caves and practiced cannibalism like their mythological counterparts and have been proven to have lived alongside modern humans until we did what we do best and killed the tits off of them to extinction. The word ogre itself was popularized by the Italian author Giambattista Basile (1575–1632) and is even seen in Beowulf as orcnēas which inspired the name of Tolkeins orcs.

Ha.

Pop Culture
As previously mentioned, Ogres are usually the next step on your path to slaying the grand master evil wizard/emperor/dragon/knight/god/hermaphrodite/lizard/king/demon/icky-nasty at his super sweet skull castle by the volcano and can usually be found in all your classic tales. The most notable ogre of recent memory is obviously Shrek, who, in my opinion, did not eat nearly enough babies. Or Eddie Murphy voiced donkeys.

Lllllllladies!

4. Trolls
The biggest and the baddest, trolls are by far the most powerful monsters on the list based on pop culture use of the creatures and legendary reference. Trolls can live under bridges and charge tolls (check the etymology on that one) like a homeless IRS agent or be found eating hobbits or being captured by really awesome bearded guys in Norway which I will get to in a minute.

I'm noticing a thing with clubs.

Origin
Trolls originated in Norse mythology where they were associated with certain geographical features (frost trolls, cave trolls, etc.) and were generally nasty creatures and not helpful to humans in the rare occasions they spoke to each other rather than eating them or getting turned to stone in the sunlight. Later, they transferred to Scandanavian mythology where they were associated with certain geographical features (frost trolls, cave trolls, etc.) and were generally nasty creatures and not helpful to humans in the rare occasions they spoke to each other rather than got eaten or turned to stone in the sunlight with the added bonus of hating all things good and Christian.

TROOOOLL!!

Pop Culture
Trolls are usually biggest and meanest of creatures in the popular mythos of stories like Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, and America (well maybe not that one). The Elder Scrolls series tries to keep it fresh by having them look and behave like gorillas crossed with Sam Fisher if you're in to that sort of thing. Personally, I think the best representation of trolls in any sort of modern media can be found in the film Troll Hunter in which a group of students making a documentary (Cloverfield style) track a government paid Troll Hunter who's job is to keep the sometimes massive (like the size of a mountain) creatures out of public eye. It's an incredibly good time and I highly recommend it to anyone for every reason.

There's... Something on the wing!

Bonus: Gremlins
Don't get them wet, don't feed them after midnight, and don't let them have access to power tools or aircraft-grade aluminum. Though not as standard as the other beasties found on this list, the gremlins have a strong following in popular culture and are the newest creature to appear in history.

Jacked the Smurf

Origin
Though the word may derive from the Old English gremian, which means "to vex," the modern use of the word gremlin is to describe creatures described by members of the Royal Air Force in the 1920s that sabotaged aircraft. The most common place to encounter a gremlin you ask? Scotland, as described by Pauline Gower in 1938, is also known as "gremlin country" where they terrible little creatures ran around snipping aircraft wires with scissors.

Giiiiiizmooo

Pop Culture
Though they can be found in Disney productions, Orson Wells radio programs, and most notably the Gremlins films, the most iconic representation to me would be the Twilight Zone depiction of the creature on the wing. You can experience this story in one of three flavor's, Captain Kirk's (Nightmare at 20,000 feet), Frasier's (Nightmare at 60,000 feet),and a very brief Jim Carrey. The tale depicts a gremlin on the wing of an passenger plane and one man's desperate attempt to save the passengers and crew while convincing them of his sanity.

Aint no party like a goblin party

And so now that you know the origins of your favorite monsters so don't be afraid to get out there and start looking. And if you find your car keys misplaced or that oddly shaped rock you saw on your Scandinavian vacation to be the least bit suspicious, who knows? There may be a story there.

Comic (barely): Why Slenderman Is So Angry

2012-09-14T11:36:00.002-04:00

Over the weekend (before last), my dear Auverin and I (mostly Auverin) excreted this from our brain glands while screwing around with my tablet and the wondrous MS Paint.

This impressive image can tell many things obviously, but let me break it down: Slenderman is angry because he is being raped by a Teletubby. The pasta-colored mess at his feet is the agateway to Hell from which he spawned. The ghost wanted a hug but Slendy is a troll and stabbed him with a knife and impaled his innards on the tree. The Sun has no idea what is going on. And there are clouds.

The End.

*Editor's Note: There are also barbs on the Teletubby's dick.

Comic: Slenderman

2012-08-28T12:41:00.001-04:00

Keeping with the Slenderman theme, this is how shit would go down if I was ever tasked with defending my woman from his creepy creepiness. (click to enlarge)

Slender Sickness: What Makes the Slender Man so Scary

2012-08-28T12:07:00.002-04:00

I can safely assume that anyone who spends a fair amount of time on the Internet has encountered this big guy. There really is no escaping him. (Bad joke, ha.) He even has his own wiki.

Personally, I'm a big fan of Slendy. There are very few monsters that can genuinely creep me out, and this guy is one of them. I have spent more time than I'm willing to admit losing sleep because of a Marble Hornets entry or chickening around in Slender.

The fact that he is so very creepy is what fascinates me about the Slender Man. As a psychology fan and an anthropology student, I feel the need to do some digging. What exactly makes the Slender Man so terrifying? Why is it that grown ass men can't play a game of Slender without wanting to cry?
To answer that question, we have to first define the Slender Man. So, unlike the post of my dear DraconisTheory, we will be digging into the history of Slendy and the finer points of his popularity.

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Although he has no exact origin, The Slender Man myth is said to date back as far as 17th century Germany. In Germanic fairy tales, he was known as Der Ritter - an exceptionally tall man dressed as a knight or a royal figure. In those times, he was meant to be a cautionary tale for children. Leave it to the Germans to come up with something so damn creepy.

See that nasty thing on the right?

Slendy allegedly appeared again in the 1900s. This time, he was said to be a freakishly tall man in a suit who had no face. Sometimes he had tentacles, other times he did not. Sightings came from America, Canada, the UK, Germany, and Russia. Most of the reports associated with him were of missing children. Around the mid-1900s, reports came from Germany of soldiers having run-ins with the Slender Man in the forest. Similar reports came from America and Canada, where skiers and children went missing in forested areas. Around the 1980s, a series of buildings supposedly went up in flames for unknown reasons, causing several deaths. This fire became the point of origin for our modern-day Slender Man.

So how did he make it to the vast interwebz?

In 2009, Something Awful Forums launched a paranormal picture contest in which participants were required to take ordinary photos and digitally manipulate them into something creepy and sinister. Then those photographs had to be posted on a number of paranormal forums as authentic photos. An SA user by the name of Victor Surge entered two black and white photographs with a short description naming the Slender Man - a mysterious creature that stalked children.

These two photographs appeared with the following caption:

"We didn't want to go, we didn't want to kill them, but it's persistent silence and outstretched arms horrified and comforted us at the same time..." 1983, photographer unknown, presumed dead.

One of two recovered photographs from the Stirling City Library blaze. Notable for being taken the day which fourteen children vanished and for what is referred to as "The Slender Man". Deformities cited as film defects by officials. Fire at library occured one week later. Actual photograph confiscated as evidence. -1986, photographer: Mary Thomas, missing since June 13, 1986.

And so the Slender Man came to the interwebz. He quickly caught the attention of several websites, the most notable being 4chan. He spread to Unfiction Forums, Fangoria, Bungie, /x/enopedia, TVTropes, DeviantArt, SlenderNation, and Mythical Creatures Guide. This sparked the first of many pseudo-documentaries concerning the Slender Man.

The most popular video accounts come from the Marble Hornets project. This project consists of a series of entries on Youtube that are supposedly tape segments recovered by someone named Jay. These uncovered tapes contain footage of a friend that had disappeared. The tapes document both the unraveling of the friend (Alex) and Jay's search for the truth about what happened to him. In the project, Slendy is known as "The Operator". There are more than 60 videos in the series right now, and the project is still going.

(Here, I will add that I am a huge Marble Hornets fan. The series gives me the creeps, and it does the whole Blair Witch thing very well. Possibly even better than the Blair Witch Project. If you've not seen the series, I highly encourage you to go check it out.)

Other video documentations of the Slender Man have since appeared. These other projects include EverymanHYBRID, DarkHarvest00, MLAndersen0, and TribeTwelve.

Slendy makes an appearance in Marble Hornets.

Slendy didn't stop at taking over Youtube. Oh no. He even has his own game: Slender (Parsec Productions, download it. It's free!). Now, I could be eloquent and give you a proper overview of the game. But that doesn't do it justice. So instead, I am going to give you a more realistic version. Slender is a simple enough game. You're in the woods with a flashlight. You don't know why you're in the woods. But you are. And you have to wander around in these creepy, dark woods until you find landmarks. There are eight pieces of paper posted on these landmarks. And these pieces of paper have weird, creepy shit written on them. And the whole time you're in these creepy woods looking for these stupid pieces of paper, the Slender Man is behind you, stalking you like the creepy fuck that he is. But you can't run away from him because you're either fat or a child or possibly a fat child. Whatever you are, you're not built for running and you'll make it about three yards before you have to slow down. But Slendy doesn't like to play fair, so any time you find a piece of paper you better haul ass back into the woods. Because finding paper makes Slendy stalk in hyperspeed. You can tell when he's close because you'll hear creepy ass noises and your screen gets all distorted. If it goes completely static, then congratulations: you've been caught by the Slender Man and will probably die in a horrible fashion.

All that aside, it really is an unsettling game, and has often been compared to Amnesia: The Dark Descent for it's scare factor. Although it is a much simpler game than Amnesia, the reaction videos are just as hilarious. I highly encourage you to go watch them.

Go in the bathroom, they said. It will be fine, they said.

---

So know that we know who the Slender Man is and where he came from, we need to explore how he operates before we can determine why he's so frightening.

Old-school Slendy was very violent. He displayed highly agressive behaviors such as impaling his victims on trees, leaving them to bleed to death, or ripping out a victim's organs. Children were his sole target.

However, the modern Slender Man is not quite as violent, but somehow much more sinister than his older counterpart. The modern Slender Man is passive aggressive toward his victims. He will stalk his target continuously, and torment the individual by repeatedly making his presence known in an invasive way - appearing inside or around the target's home, on a road during travel, at the workplace when the target is alone, or while the target is sleeping. This elimination of any safe zone tends to spark uneasiness and paranoia in the victim. However, Slendy will probably not attack for a long time. Instead, he will just continue to follow his victims and creep them the fuck out.

If targeted over an extended period of time, victims will usually experience a delve into madness. Paranoia takes over; the victim doesn't feel safe anywhere. Wild mood swings occur, and constant irritation is present. Victims suffer from "Slender Sickness", which is marked by coughing fits, coughing up blood, nausea, vomiting, bloody nose, and fever. The most prominent effect of Slender Sickness is amnesia. Victims will often awaken with no idea where they are, what they are doing, or how they got there. Memory loss can be a period of hours, days, weeks, or even months. It's undetermined whether this memory loss is a defense mechanism triggered by an encounter with the Slender Man, or the work of Slendy himself. Either way, the victim ends up with a life that is in ruins.

When a Slendy target does finally disappear, it is usually not by direct action of the Slender Man. Victims usually disappear on their own, leaving no trace behind. Victims are never found. It is uncertain where exactly the victims go, or what happens to them after they disappear. Any video documentation of an encounter with Slendy is highly distorted (another known effect of his presence), making it almost impossible to see exactly what occurs when he appears.

Another shot of Slendy, courtesy of Marble Hornets.

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Now I can answer the question I've wanted to answer all along. Why is the Slender Man so fucking terrifying? What is it about him that makes people want to shut their laptops and never sleep again?

I have a guess. This is my "educated opinion" if you will, and I don't claim to be any sort of expert on Slendy or the complex workings of the human psyche.

The Slender Man is scary for two reasons:

1. He's invasive.

2. He's a plethora of uncertainties.

Allow me to elaborate.

We as a species like the idea of having a safe place we can retreat to. That's why we have doors that lock. So we can keep danger out of our safe place. That is also why we like groups. We like to be with other humans, because that will prevent us from being isolated in a dangerous or otherwise fear-inducing situation.We'd rather be terrified with someone else than terrified alone. But really, we'd prefer not to be terrified at all.

The Slender Man rips that comfort right out from underneath us. Most monsters have some weakness, or some way that you can escape from them. Some monsters can't go out in the sunlight. Some can only get to you when you're alone. Some can't leave the premises they're found on. Some can be killed. Some, like the monsters in Amnesia, can be hidden from.

Not Slender Man.

Slendy doesn't give a fuck where you are or what you're doing. He's there. Daytime, nighttime. Alone, or around other people. In the woods, in your house, in your workplace, in the shower. Slendy doesn't give a fuck. If you're sleeping, fucking, eating, whatever you're doing, he's fucking watching you. And nothing can stop him. Walls? Fuck that, Slender Man can teleport. And as far as anyone knows, there's no way to kill him.

Not only does Slendy invade your personal space and make you feel completely unsafe wherever you are, he invades your body and your mind. Once you come into contact with him, you're done for. You lose your shit. You can't remember anything. And the whole time you're losing your shit and trying to remember what the fuck is going on, you're coughing up blood and trying not to puke all over the place. The only thing you can do is wander around while your entire psyche crumbles and wait until you lose your shit so much that you just disappear somewhere and you're never heard from again.

If Slendy wants to find you, he will find you. You can't escape him. And even when he's gone, you haven't escaped. Once he's got you, he's got you for good and there's not a goddamn thing you can do about it. Game over.

The second terrifying element of Mr. Slender is the uncertainty that surrounds him. Human beings are constantly trying to figure out the world around them. We want to pick everything apart and understand why it is the way it is. How it works. What it does. If we can't figure that out, it bothers us on every level of our existence. It makes us question the very fabric of the universe if we can't make sense of something.

Now let's think about Slendy for a second. Where did he really come from? No one knows. Why does he do what he does? No one knows. How exactly does he do it? No one knows. No one really knows anything about him other than the fact that he's tall, faceless, and drives people to madness.

That's exactly the same reason why Hannibal Lecter is so scary. Aside from the mention of survival in Hannibal Rising, no one knows why this vastly intelligent psychiatrist eats people. He just does it. And that is fucking unsettling.

Slender Man just torments people, and that's all we really know about him. That's all we're ever going to know about him. And as humans, that creeps us out on an instinctual level. If we can't understand something, we fear it.

Maybe he has a reason. Or maybe Slendy is just a sick fuck. Either way, the reaction he induces is one of unadulterated fear. And rightly so - he triggers two of our psyches' most sensitive points.

Now that I have thoroughly bored and/or terrified you all, have some Slender memes.

This is also what I think when Skype gets all weird on me.

No Slendy, that's okay. You can keep the juice.

SLENDERMAN VS. HOLLYWOOD

2012-08-27T22:47:00.000-04:00

If there is one horrible, disgusting creature that wants to wrap it's tentacles around your wallet it's Hollywood. This is what happens when said creature figures it can exploit the interweb sub-culture for movie ideas:

They didn't even have the decency to make him look like something other than a homeless Ezio Auditore da Firenze.

Yes, The Tall Man. The imdb page offers the synopsis of :"When her child goes missing, a mother looks to unravel the legend of the Tall Man, an entity who allegedly abducts children." The fact they're using Jessica Biel as the hook should be evidence enough this thing is gonna blow monkey dick across the land.

I mentioned monkeys so this relevant... I think.

Why would they do this, you ask? Because Hollywood is greed in manifest and they need money, all those starving movie execs need their coffee, dammit. As for why they chose to turn a meme into a movie, your guess is as good as mine. I doubt this thing is targeted to fans of the Slenderman himself but rather the result of a prophecy that foretells of an upcoming shift of interestet towards a semi-popular idea that resulted in an accountant-bred script that was hashed out to make a quick buck. The people who made the decision to make this movie, the same breed who forced the reboot of Spiderman though for slightly different reasons, have been at this game for a long time and they can probably smell upcoming trends like my dog can smell bacon through a lead wall. I'm not saying memes are about to take a sudden leap into mainstream pop culture but... what if?

They're starving.

The Slenderman is a legendary meme and I won't go into the back story of the character here; however, if you're interested, MemeBase offers a thorough description of how the guy came to be and how the Internet blew him up into the modern mythological, web-based powerhouse he is today. If you don't feel like sifting through all that crap here's my description: He is a faceless, skinny, tall, pale dude in a suit with tentacles (sometimes), and has a thing for stealing kids and standing creepily in the background.

He was photo bombing before it was cool.

To me he can be seen as a metaphor for the average American's fear of the government, a faceless entity with many arms preying upon children and the unwary. He has no apparent rules to where he can be and he is always watching his victims day and night, even in their own homes. He is frequently portrayed in wooded areas distanced from civilization which could also be symbolic of the tendrils of man pushing out the nature-based monsters of the past and extending into the wild, leaving no place untouched. He is a modern day boogie man, a representation of our society's fears and paranoia and there is no safe place from his grasp. I find this all very ironic considering the commercialization that is actually happening to him as represented by the release of this movie, and thus proving once again how Hollywood loves to rape the good out of everything.

I couldn't resist.

If you're truly craving a Slenderman film-based narrative I suggest the pretty decent Marble Hornets series on YouTube. It's told from the first person, shaky-cam perspective of a college student who's trying to track down his friend who is apparently being stalked by the elusive Slenderman for unknown reasons, though in this series the monster is referred to as 'The Operator' but who gives a shit? It's still Slender and it's worth a watch, especially if you're into the Paranormal Activity/Blair Witch style of storytelling.

This is a screen from Marble Hornets.

But that's that. Who knows, maybe I'm just talking out of my ass (not surprising) and needed something to post this week. Regardless, here is a small Slenderman gallery I've dug up from various sources around the web. Take a gander and try to get some sleep tonight (click the picture to enlarge).

The Splendidman

Fun.

Buzz Slenderman

Hint: Look left.

This is the most disturbing to me.

Ha. Nostalgia.

I don't...

Slenderhitcher

BATTLE OF THE CENTURY

Style.

Daw.

Maybe he's just trying to recapture his youth... GEDDIT?!

More creepiness.

My people will call your people.

Slenderman by Tim Burton

Dr. Octoslendamang

No smiles in the slender parade.

His true motivation.

Completely irrelevant but this randomly came up during my search and I had to share.

Flame On! (yeah, I know...)

2012-08-26T10:31:00.001-04:00

Aloha Everyone!

This is a test of the early blogging system. Had this been an actual emergency, you would not be here.

If you have several questions that need answering, I know a great number of people at my College willing to share.

Despite the odd ball sleep pattern, life is becoming increasingly more enjoyable. Interests in Anime and Games are limited to irregular patterns of interest, but I do very much enjoy the hard work that goes into each production.

Titles include: Evangelion, particularly "Endless Waltz"; Final Fantasy and very recently Darksiders 2.

Sideline interests are Environment, Education and slew of others - including my current Major Graphic Design. Currently, I am not taking work outside of class just yet. Nightmare course load going on.

Other than all of those lovely syllables...

How are you doing?

Later cowboys.... (Cowboy Bebop)

Editor's Note: This is the first post by one of our newest contributors, the fantastic Jonathan Allen! He's one of the my good buddies from the Navy and I'd like to extend my personal welcome and you all do the same. -DraconisTheory

What? A Girl? On Raptor Inc.?

2012-08-26T10:22:00.000-04:00

Oh yes. A female has been added to the team, and a redhead at that. I’m Auverin – the newest and palest face at Raptor Inc.

This is how I wear a Raptor Inc. t-shirt:

I don’t really like to talk about myself a lot because I am weird and awkward and I tend to leave important things out…mostly I forget to warn people that I am weird and awkward. But you have been warned, so now I can get to the important stuff.

I am indeed 100% female, and the very lucky girlfriend of DraconisTheory (as mentioned in a recent news post, I believe). I’m a starving college student. Well, not starving, but I’ve had popcorn as a meal more than once this week. I write, I paint, I play music. And I do game on occasion. I wouldn’t say I’m avid enough to beat any of these guys at anything, But I do play enough to kick some ass in RPGs and occasionally give DraconisTheory a spear to the face.

I can’t quite say what sorts of things I am going to post, because once again I am rather odd and prone to act on a whim. I can say that I am helping out with a brand new project that will be rather expansive. As it was said earlier in the month, the project is still in a conceptual stage, but I am its writer, and therefore I am held responsible if it never gets done. So that will be my job for the next few months. Getting that shit finished. Somewhere in there I might actually post something relevant. Who knows?

I don’t have anything else of merit to say, so I’m just going to end this awkwardly and abruptly.

Tschau.

Comic: My Life in IT

2012-08-20T10:47:00.004-04:00

So let's get these weekly comics started back up, okay? They may not be grand, but they'll at least be a bit more frequent. Hopefully the other guys will follow suit, if not, FUQ 'EM.

Raptor Inc. News - 17 August, 2012

2012-08-17T13:35:00.002-04:00

Yeah, we're terrible at keeping this thing updated. Here's what we're ACTUALLY up to:

Shadonickles has a job and is being fat.

Fat4all has two jobs and is being fat.

Ogachy-ie is about to be a senior in high school and I assume will also be being fat.

DraconisTheory has a girlfriend and a job and is being fat.

The End.

As for projects: The movie is at a standstill until I can get a better system to edit the video. I have no idea how long this will take. We're fiddling with new T-shirt designs and will keep you posted. We have a big project coming up that will involve, sound, writing, and video and it's still in the conceptual phase but I'm pretty excited about it and will involve the newest member of the team.

That is all.

Book Review: the perks of being a wallflower by Stephen Chbosky

2012-08-17T13:27:00.001-04:00

It's a book!

The perks of being a wallflower is a book about being a troubled teen. His troubles are varied, social, and may surprise you with their realism. The story is told through first person letters to a mystery recipient, all you know about the man who is reading Charlie's diary is that he "could have had sex with that girl at the party but didn't" and Charlie thinks that he is worth writing to.

I love you creepy word man.

I admit I was hesitant to read this book, not because I wasn't intrigued by it's concept, but because I don't like depressing stories, especially ones that make me remember my own confusing and angst-filled teenage years. It was recommended to me by my girlfriend who has a special fondness for these sort of tales even though they have the habit of eliciting the most unpleasant of emotional responses. Don't get me wrong, this is not the saddest or wrenching story I have ever read, I'm just saying it makes you feel. When looking for an avenue of entertaining story time most people are hunting for just that, entertaining story time, not feelings; those critters can be scary.

Bitches be trippin'.

Charlie is a highly intelligent boy and a joy to live with during the course of the book. It's a shorter story, only 206 pages with standard young-adult-fiction style font and easy pacing. Charlie is an observer and a boy of great understanding of his peers. However, all of his troubles begin when he takes the advice of his teacher and begins to peel away from the wall and "participate" in the life of a social high school student. Shenanigans ensue, including dealings with the Rocky Horror Picture Show, pre-2010 hipsters, pot brownies, and prom.

Swag.

There are a couple controversial tones which I will cover here and they may be spoiler-ish so please skip ahead if that isn't your thing. First: Homosexuality. Charlie's best friend is gay and having a relationship with a popular football player who wants to keep the relationship a secret. After they break up and Patrick (Charlie's friend) proceeds to have a complete fucking melt down and he uses Charlie to alleviate his loneliness and they end up having drunken make-out sessions. Now, this whole situation got to me at first but then I allowed myself to open up and really think about it. Charlie is trying to help his friend. Throughout the story you learn to what lengths he will go to and what sacrifices he will endure for the sake of his friends. It's an emotional and very real thing.

I'M TRYING TO BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY.

(Still in Spoiler Mode) Second: Insanity. Charlie has problems. Yes, he is intelligent and understanding and amazing but there's an underlying core to this. It all stems from his Aunt's death and Charlie struggles with this and his own fragile mind at especially angsty moments of his freshman year. It brings up the topic of how we should treat teen mental problems, medication, etc. and can inspire deeper thought. (Yeah, there's a bit of sex and suicide but they didn't hit me nearly as much as those first two topics.)

Craaaaaaazy.

(Spoiler Mode over) In closing it's a good book and I recommend it to anyone who doesn't mind turning back the clock to those confusing and exciting years and seeing the institution of high school from a unique social perspective.

My mom put mustard on my sandwich... I may cut myself....

Best quotes:
"Charlie, we accept the love we think we deserve."
"Not everyone has a sob story, Charlie, and even if they do it's no excuse."
"And in that moment, I swear we were infinite."

Self explanatory.

Also, there is a movie coming out in 2012 that was written and directed by Chbosky himself.

Watson. Yes.

What the hell... AN UPDATE?!?!??!

2012-04-25T02:52:00.000-04:00

What's happenin'.

After a long, long, LONG absence in which nearly every member of our blog went through various changes in their lives (new jobs, moving, etc.) I am happy to announce that we will be indeed be making a return to normal posting!

Woohoo.

Yay?

Whatever...

ANYWAYS!

Expect new posts in the coming week, including some reviews and goodies from yours truly! (I'm sure you can't wait)

He knows.

Damnation & Redemption: A Look Back at Fallout

2012-01-26T20:34:00.026-05:00

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Today, I'd like to have a look back on one of my favorite game franchises; Fallout.
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Fallout Background Info

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On October 23rd, 2077, the Great War started and ended, lasting only two hours. No one knows who attacked first but every country responded at once, dropping nuclear warheads and bathing the world in atomic fire. Before the Great War, a nuclear holocaust was in plain sight and was fast approaching. Hundreds of large underground bunkers were built and called Vaults. The Vaults were built by Vault-Tec, a scientific corporation with a dark agenda hidden behind a friendly exterior, built them. The Vaults were really controlled scientific experiments, though they did provide shelter from the radioactive blasts. The Democratic nations and the Reds were at each other's throats and the world had reached its breaking point.

The United States had annexed Canada as China invaded Alaska. With quick timing, the US retook Alaska but had problems on the homefront. Soldiers were falling out of the ranks and riots were rampant. The soldiers that went AWOL were sent to military prisons while the President and his secretive military organization, the Enclave, retreated to an Oil Rig for safety. A plague breaks out as the F.E.V. (Forced Evolution Virus, a biological chemical that mutates genetic data in organisms) is leaked and the world goes up in fear.

At this time, Captain Roger Maxson and his men kill the researchers they were assigned to protect after finding out they were doing horrible experiments on military prisoners. Maxson and his men desert the army and move civilians into the research base they were guarding. After the bombs stopped falling, the research station was unharmed. Maxson led his men and their families to a fallout shelter in what is known as "the Exodus". The years passed and this group became known as the Brotherhood of Steel, an organization dedicated to retrieving technology and storing it. They didn't believe people were responsible enough to have it after the events of the Great War.

Life went on and the Wastleland remained. Vaults opened and people spilled out, those left outside that had survived set up settlements, and factions formed. In California, the NCR (New California Republic) formed and set up a democracy. In the Midwest, a faction based off the Roman Empire formed, known as Caesar's Legion. They gathered slaves and conquered all in their path. Splinter chapters of the Brotherhood of Steel showed up across the country and the Enclave spread across the United States. All manner of people roamed the wastes. Raiders and settlers, Vault dwellers and soldiers, traders and mercenaries. Though purged in atomic heat, the Wasteland held many new creatures, products of mutation from the radiation and the F.E.V. that lingered in the air. Men lived, fought, traded, worked, survived, and died under an uncaring sun.

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Fallout

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The place where it all began. Set in a world that mixes the 50's style, futuristic technology, and Cold War fear of nuclear conflict, Fallout came out in 1997 as a spiritual successor to the 1988 game Wasteland. Taking place around southern California in 2161, 84 years after a nuclear conflict known as The Great War, Fallout stars the "Vault Dweller" on his quest to find a water chip for his home within 150 days, yet the game has a 500 day time limit. His home happens to be number 13 of the Vaults. Fallout brought something new to the RPG table, the S.P.E.C.I.A.L. (Strength, Perception, Endurance, Charisma, Intelligence, Agility, Luck) system. Your base S.P.E.C.I.A.L. stats reflect the skills you may have and your interactions with the world. The game was a new experience, based on exploration and time managing. It was fun and definitely not forgettable.

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Fallout 2

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The sequel to Fallout, Fallout 2 brought improvement to the series. It brought many more items, improved AI, better companions, a more expansive story and world, karma, and large scale effect of player's actions. You start in the town of Arroyo, started by the Vault Dweller in Oregon. As the grandchild of the Vault Dweller, you play the "Chosen One", chosen to find the Garden of Eden Creation Kit (G.E.C.K.) to help rebuild the town to ideal conditions. During this, the Enclave has reared its head for the first time since the Great War and has surpassed the Brotherhood of Steel in technological sophistication. You are given your grandparent's Vault suit, Pip-Boy, a flask, and some cash as you set off. As you play, you begin to uncover the Enclave's sinister plots and deeds and you take it upon yourself to fight them. Fallout 2 contained some silly content, but also came with much more than Fallout and came without that timed quest. For that, Fallout 2 was a great experience.

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Fallout 3

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The third game in the series and first developed by Bethesda, Fallout 3 continued Fallout's original style. Often characterized as "Oblivion with guns", this comes from the fact it uses the same engine and gameplay mechanics as Bethesda's fourth Elder Scrolls title. The game brought Fallout into the third dimension and was a dramatic change. The point-and-click system and turn based combat were replaced by an over-the-shoulder view and real time fighting. The auto-travel map was replaced by a seamless exterior world. The VATS (Vault-Tec Assisted Targeting System) introduces itself as a throwback to the old combat style of the previous two games. It freezes time and allows you to auto-aim at body parts, giving you a certain chance to hit or miss. The game also moves to the East coast in the Capital Wasteland, Washington D.C. As a survivor from Vault 101, you go amongst the world in search of your father and then get wrapped up in much more than anticipated. This game was a welcome change of pace, combing Fallout with the system of Oblivion, another of my favorite game series.

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Fallout: New Vegas

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The second Bethesda published Fallout game was developed by Obsidian Entertainment and was heavier on inspiration from Fallout 2. With a much larger game complete with many more items, factions, and quests, it is easy to see how it draws from Fallout 2 (especially with the "Wild Wasteland" perk that makes events happen that tend to be pop-culture references, much like Fallout 2's random encounters.) Featuring the power struggle between the NCR and Caesar's Legion, you play as a simple courier that was in the wrong place at the wrong time. A quest for revenge becomes a quest for power as you determine the fate of post-apocalyptic Las Vegas. To me, this is the best Fallout game yet. It didn't have the drive of Fallout, the open-endedness of Fallout 2, or the tone of Fallout 3, yet it brought something else. It combined the best of all the games into an outstanding title and my choice Bethesda game. Good show, Fallout: New Vegas, good show.

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Closing

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Wait, aren't you going to do Tactics and Brotherhood of Steel? No. Though I do like the Midwestern Brotherhood of Steel, I never played Tactics. Also let's just pretend Fallout: Brotherhood of Steel doesn't exist. Like it was a bad dream. In fact, its not even canon so to hell with it. Bad game anyway. So, in conclusion, I thank Fallout for its contributions not only to RPGs as an industry, but its contributions to me. It expanded my horizons in a genre sense and a creative sense. Oh what the world would be like without Fallout... nothing but fantasy RPGs and that's no fun. Need a little purgation to have a good time. Well, that's it for me. Until next time folks. See you in the wastes.

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Ogachi's Top 10 of 2011

2012-01-24T18:11:00.018-05:00

Alright! Video games! So! I suppose I should make one of these. So I will.

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10

L.A. Noire
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L.A. Noire is an interesting experiment in game design. With unique gameplay and fancy animation technology, L.A. Noire set out to do something different. Though it had it's flaws, (Most particularly with a robotic main character and lack of detail on anything that is not a face. Hell, even the faces were not very well textured though they sure were well animated.) L.A. Noire still brought something new and interesting to the table and it did it well.

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9

Batman: Arkham City
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Batman: Arkham City is the sequel to Arkham Asylum and does a good job carrying on tradition. In fact, it doesn't really bring much new to the table but more of the same isn't a bad thing. The game still handles well and is filled with fun Batman villains! Even with the lack of new ideas, Arkham City is still a great game and has earned its spot on this list.

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8

Deus Ex: Human Revolution
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Deus Ex: Human Revolution is a long awaited addition to the franchise and it carries it on well. With gameplay reminiscent (if not a dumbed down version) of its predecessors, Deus Ex continues the focus on playing the game as you see fit and leveling accordingly.

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7

Brink
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Brink successfully combines the movement of Mirror's Edge and the style of Team Fortress 2 into one package. Though the story is kind of silly, the game pulls through on its gameplay and the amount of fun it can provide.

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6

Dead Space 2
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Though not as suspenseful as its predecessor, Dead Space 2 is able to carry the Sci-Fi horror's legacy well. Leaning even more towards the Action Horror genre, Dead Space 2 still is able to satisfy with its dark environments and flowing gameplay.

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5

Portal 2
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Portal 2 follows suit of Batman: Arkham City in that it also gives more of the same, though lacking much innovation. The slime and co-op modes are welcome additions nonetheless and the game still shines amongst the crowd. The witty dialogue, stellar soundtrack, and seamless gameplay combine to make this game number 5 on this list.

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4

Warhammer 40,00: Space Marine
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Though it does not have all the amenities the other games have, Warhammer 40,000: Space Marine does bring one important thing to the table; Gameplay. It performs masterfully and feels great to play. Charging down groups of Orks and just hacking through crowds is a great time.

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3

Total War: Shogun 2
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What can I say? Total War: Shogun 2 is everything a truly large-scale strategic RTS should be. With the ability to command armies and sabotage cities on its turnbased overland map and siege your foes in battle mode, the game is easily the best RTS I have played in a long time. Add all that to the fact it is also the prettiest RTS to come about lately and Total War: Shogun 2 rightfully claims the number 3 spot on this list.

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2

The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim
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Imagine Oblivion. Now make the graphics better and the character concepts more gritty. Now put the civil war from Star Wars in there. Put snow everywhere. Skyrim has been made. It is also more of the same but brings a new(ish) combat system to the fray as well as a new leveling system. The game is a great time and (with modding communities like the ones Bethesda games have) will be around for a good long time.

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1

Dark Souls
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Oh man you guys. My number one game. What else could it have been? Of course its Dark Souls! A Medieval fantasy setting with fun controls and a good difficulty curve, it is a game that achieves being challenging but not frustrating. It easily worked its way to this spot with its infer-your-own-story and 3rd person sword fighting. Dark Souls earned everything its gotten from me. What can I say? It was a fun roll through hell.

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And that's the ball game. Until next time folks. See you online.

Lightning Warfare: A Look at Tribes: Ascend

2012-01-19T19:33:00.013-05:00

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Foreword

This is my first look at the beta of the free-to-play adaption to the Tribes franchise; Tribes: Ascend. Alright, I'll admit that the only Tribes game I've played is Tribes: Vengeance and only after the multiplayer was thoroughly dead. So, don't expect a nostalgic look back. Instead, expect a look into the future of frictionless warfare!

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Concept

The game focuses around the conflict between the Blood Eagles and the Diamond Swords, leaving out the Children of the Phoenix and the Star Wolves. It is always possible that the two factions may be added at a later date.

The game has twelve different classes to choose from. There are four light , five medium, and three heavy classes. Each class has its own unique gear set and purpose. Light classes are flag cappers while heavy classes are made for defense and medium classes tend to be general purpose.

There is a leveling system in T:A. Each class has an XP meter. The more you play that class, the more XP you will get for it. With the XP, you can buy upgrades for that class. The upgrades tend to be ammo, damage, speed and capacity boosts, though there are others. The XP is specific to each class and cannot be used for others. Also with the XP, you may buy perks after finishing a class's tree. Each class has two perks and the perks can be used for any class, no matter which you got them from. "Convert to Shared XP" is a feature currently in the menu of the game, though it is listed as coming soon. It is unknown when it will become functional. Shared XP may allow a central pool of XP that can be used for each class, though you will likely lose some XP in the transfer.

Along with XP as currency are tokens and gold. Tokens and gold are used to purchase classes in the game, the gold price being lower than the token price. Tokens are earned through playing while gold is bought. You may also buy boosts with real money. After your first purchase, you get VIP status that gives you a permanent 50% boost to token and XP gain. The boosts you can buy double your XP and token gain for 10 or 30 days. They cost $7.95 and $14.95 respectively. Therefore, T:A is not a pay-to-win game, it just gives you a bit of a headstart. There is nothing you can get with gold that you can't get with tokens.

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Gameplay

Tribes: Ascend uses the same formula that previous Tribes games have used. Movement in the game consists largely of skiing and jetpacking. You ski downhill and across flat ground while you jetpack up slopes and over obstacles. Skiing is a function that lets you move without friction, basically sliding around with your only limitation and booster being gravity. When mastered, extreme speeds can be reached this way, especially in light armor.

Weapons are varied throughout the classes. There are two classes unlocked as you first begin to play: The Soldier and the Ranger. The Soldier uses the classic spinfusor and energy pistol combo while the Ranger uses an assault rifle and a thumper grenade launcher. Both wear medium armor. The rest of the medium classes tend to use grenade launchers and automatic weapons. Also, there is an engineer class that can build turrets. That's pretty cool. The heavy classes use large weapons like the Doombringer's chain gun and saber launcher while the light classes are the most varied with sniper rifles, shotguns, and SMGs. Each weight type has its own spinfusor class, which is great because the spinfusor is probably the greatest gun in history.

There are currently three gamemodes: Team Deathmatch, Capture the Flag, and Rabbit. Team Deathmatch is your standard kill-them-because-they-look-different mode with one difference. In T:A TDM, there is a flag that drops after the first death. The team that holds the flags gets more points for kills. Capture the Flag is just standard CTF except you gotta go fast. Rabbit is a mode where there is a single flag. The player that gets the flag becomes the Rabbit and is marked for death. The rest of the players then chase down the Rabbit and kill him. The flag is dropped after the Rabbit's death and the person who picks it up becomes the Rabbit, continuing the cycle. The person who has held onto the flag the longest wins.

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Conclusion

Conclusion? What? Aren't you going to do Generic Technical Reviewing? No. This is a beta. A closed beta at that. The review will come when it's done. As for now, enjoy my phrasing. Anyway, Tribes: Ascend is great fun and is shaping up nicely. I can't wait to see all the features that will be added by release. As for now, it is only a PC game though the developers have talked about a console possibility. Not the Wii though, that would be silly. After this comes out, the developers will continue their work on Tribes Universe, the upcoming Tribes MMO. Oh the wonderment yet to be seen. Until next time folks. See you on the slopes.

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Hardships & Perseverance: A Review of Dark Souls

2012-01-17T16:17:00.020-05:00

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Foreword

Remember how at the end of my Warhammer 40,000: Space Marine review I said my next would be Dark Souls? Well here it is. Finally. I've been procrastinating. I actually beat the game last year but am just getting around to the review. Don't let this dishearten you though, I promise I'll make it extra amazing, just for you. Also, you can think of it as consolation to you for waiting so long.

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Introduction

Dark Souls is a revisitation to the lands the sadist minds at FROM Software have created and released for the masochist inside all of us. This time around you fight your way through the region of Lordran, the Land of the Lords. As the Chosen Undead, your job is to usurp Lord Gwyn, Lord of Cinder, and take his crown for yourself. In doing so, you may continue the Age of Fire- or usher in the Age of Dark. With an array of sharpened metal sticks, large blunt objects, fiery hand gestures, and magical twigs, you fight your way through hollow undead legions, trying to fulfill your one destiny and decide the fate of the Undead.

Now it is true that Demon's Souls is my favorite game ever, so of course I was going to buy this. Hell, when it was announced I felt like riding a blazing horse through the ruins of a castle, sword held high and folk metal playing me through. That's how awesome I knew this game would be. Was it? Keep on reading.

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Challenge

The big selling point behind the "Souls" games is their difficulty level. The slightest mistake, missing your timing by a second, swinging at the wrong moment, all of these can and will get you killed. That's the beauty behind it, though. No matter what happens, your misfortune is your fault. Even if you hit for next to nothing and can't take a punch, you can still outmaneuver and outfight your opponent. I played Dark Souls the exact same way I played Demon's Souls. I was a realistic Knight. I got my Elite Knight's Armor, my Crest Shield, my Longsword, my Mace, and my Dagger. That's it. I relied on my skill and wits from there.

Now, the big question is, "Was it harder than Demon's Souls?" Well, yes and no. Dark Souls is harder in the way of enemy types, tactics, and resources. The healing grass in Demon's Souls has been replaced with an Estus Flask, which can have a maximum of 20 swigs. Of course it refills at every bonfire, but depending on the kindle state of the fire, it may not fill as much. In Dark Souls, some early bosses can and will be encountered as normal enemies later in the game and their strength is horrifying in every way. A boss fight a minute is a terrifying prospect, especially if you don't have the environmental advantage you had earlier or you are facing multiple bosses. The enemies themselves are much more varied, some undefeatable without a certain item or upgrade. This does not mean you cannot advance without the item, but you'd be crazy to try it. In the way of tactics, some enemies require quick maneuvering in small or deadly areas and some need a hit and run tactic in an infested area.

The beauty behind the Souls games is the level design. It is truly magnificent. The reason Castlevania was such an amazing experience was because it was so well thought out. The enemies were placed just so because the developers knew players would try something there or take that route. The Souls games mirror this, never passing up the chance to ruin your day by placing a snake-man with a large sword on a narrow bridge that is littered with bladed pendulums every few feet or placing archers that fire GOD DAMN TREE TRUNKS at you while you are on a thin arch.

But, Dark Souls is also easier than Demon's Souls in a way. The bonfire system is a godsend. Instead of dying and restarting the entire level, you go to the last bonfire rested at, which is a lot closer than the start of a zone. When you die, you no longer go into soul form and lose half your health. You instead "Hollow" and become an icky-nasty zombie. Whilst icky-nasty, you cannot kindle bonfires to raise your estus capacity, nor can you summon, though you also cannot be invaded. Also removed is the load weight, so now you can carry a billion pounds and not give a damn. But, the equipment weight is still there, so don't expect to roll around with that 500 lbs armor anytime soon.

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New Features

So what's new? What's different from Demon's Souls? Well laddie, the game is open world, for one. Instead of a central "Nexus" like in Demon's Souls, you may freely travel from zone to zone. It's not open world in a Skyrim sense, but more of a S.T.A.L.K.E.R. sense, allowing specific paths between zones, just without loading screens. The fun part about it is the fact there is no map. Exploring for yourself and finding hidden shortcuts between zones is a relief and suspenseful, never sure of what's around the corner or where the nearest bonfire is.

The bonfire system is new as well. When fully upgraded, the bonfire serves as a med station, Blacksmith Ed, Stockpile Thomas, Maiden in Black, and courage booster. With the purchase of smithing tools, you can upgrade and repair your armor yourself and the bottomless box allows you to store weapons and items.

Also new is Pyromancy. Instead of being classified under magic, fire and poison arts are classified under the primitive art of harnessing natural power: pyromancy. The Pyromancer class is the new Royal class, the spells are surprisingly strong, but not exactly varied.

Finally, there is the covenant system. There are nine covenants in the game, each with its own perks and purpose. They are highly recommended due to the spells, items, or assistance they may give. The Warriors of Sunlight, for instance, give you lightning spells and turn your summon sign gold. When you see a gold summon sign in the game, you rush for it. The "Sunbros" are the most sought after phantoms there are and have no problem being summoned. Conversely, the Darkwraiths gain the "Red Eye Orb" and invade worlds for the sole purpose of being a dick.

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Generic Technical Reviewing

Graphics- HOOOOLY FUCK THAT'S A DETAILED GOD DAMMIT I'M DEAD. The graphics look pretty nice, the only real issues being clipping. Two-handed weapons tend to enter pauldrons all the damn time. But hey, to fix this, they would need to make custom animations for each armor and fuck that. In large areas, the game tends to lag a bit. Blighttown is a big perpetrator of this. Parrying enemies in large environments or when large bosses do large attacks tend to lag it as well. Other than that, it's quite pretty, especially the cutscenes and more scenic spots in the game, such as Anor Londo.

Gameplay- WHACK THAT TAIL! I love the Souls gameplay. The lock-on system still works and it all flows together right well. The game is only difficult if you are brash or clumsy and that's how it should be. Also, a lot of bosses involve getting something if you hack off their tail. I thought that was worth mentioning.

Sound- PWSH! RAAARGH! FWOOOSH! The game only has music at the zone entrances, "safe" zones, cutscenes, and boss fights. It's damn good too. The voice actors are actually pretty good and portray their characters well (Plus Siegmeyer's battle chant is epic). The only problems I have with the sound effects are that, from time to time when you parry or backstab, it makes a jet engine noise, kinda a PWOOOOOOOOOIISSH noise. It sounds silly.

Multiplayer- OHFUCKOHFUCKOHFUCK PLEASE DON'T FIND ME. The Souls game's dynamic drop-in multiplayer system is fantastic. The sheer relief of finding of a summon sign before a boss or the terror of hearing the noise of a rising phantom you didn't summon is lovely. Rolling through undead while helping a beginner or stomping a veteran into the dirt is a highly satisfying experience. It's a shame the servers aren't optimized for shit. People sliding around and backstabbing from a mile away aren't as prominent anymore, but goddammit that is not okay.

Overall- I loved this game. It was amazing for me and it will be fun for a good long while more. So, what's better? Demon's Souls or Dark Souls? Sorry Dark Souls, but Demon's Souls still holds that title, though you aren't far behind. If you aren't sure about these games, don't delay. Get them. Until next time folks. See you in hell.

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(Yet Another) Katawa Shoujo review

2012-01-11T21:29:00.005-05:00

Apparently, some people here are interested in my take on this little ditty, so I'll just get my two cents in and be gone.

I'm skipping the whole describing the game bits because it looks like the other three stooges have already gotten it pretty much covered.

When I had originally heard about KS some time ago, all I knew it to be was a crippled girl dating sim that got a bit of attention from a certain online imageboard. Soon, some of my associates started playing it as well, so I figured, "What the hell, why not?" I'm not a very clever man, so I'll just describe my experience in the order that it happened, instead of worrying about trying to make a sensible review.

First impressions for Act I were pretty favorable, considering the type of 'game' this is. It was written pretty well, and I could sense the effort those fellows at fourleaf put into the game. Art was pretty decent, and the music worked alright for the scenes. The characters were interesting and I was having a good time of things. Something I noticed was that, although, at times it seems like the choices you make in the story don't really impact that much right away, some of the decisions will end up with much different outcomes from the others. Subtlety is nice, but some might not enjoy that as much as others. Take the statement as you will.

After my decisions were processed from the first act, it seems that I ended up pursuing the path of the energetic track-star, Emi. I won't lie, going through the first scene of this path was quite disgusting for me at the time. It was so sugary-sweet, I felt like someone was injecting pure cane sugar, with a needle, directly into my eye. I actually had to step away for a while. Perhaps I'm just too cynical, I dunno. BUT, I decided that I wouldn't be deterred, and kept trucking. Past the first nauseating scene, things calm down a bit, and eventually I start finding that the rest of this isn't so bad. The story arc rolls on as you get to know Emi better, sharing laughs, tears, and eventually learning of her tragic past, before finally reconciling in each other and going on to live happy lives together(Maybe!). Oh, there's also some sex scenes here and there. (Emi's a bit too loli for my tastes, her MOM though, WHOA-OA) All in all, it was a cute, engrossing little tale of romance between 2 young people, and I was quite pleased with the read.

That was my take on my run of the game, so this is the part where I give my last thoughts on the piece as a whole:

Overall, I enjoyed the story enough to stick it out to the end, considering all I knew about it was that it was Cripple Porn: The Game. The presentation is swell, and the menus and options are all super easy to navigate. If you don't like romance novels or things of that nature, then Katawa Shoujo probably won't sway your opinion on the matter, but I invite you to give it a shot. It's free, after all. I can think of worse ways to spend an afternoon. I still feel it's important to remember, however, that it's still a game to try to get into the pants of a bunch of crippled high school girls. Though, if you're like me, you might find the story engaging on its own.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to unlock the rest of the paths and hundred-percenting this tale. 'Til next time.

-shadonickles

Drawing Judy Garland

2012-01-10T18:11:00.000-05:00

Aint she purdy?

My reference image.

This drawing is a big deal to me because it's the biggest one I've ever done on paper, the biggest one I've inked, the largest portrait I've ever drawn, and the biggest thing I've ever had framed. It was a big deal. GET IT?! It came out pretty good, so good in fact I thought I'd share how I did it with you fine people.

This project started out as me needing something to put on the bare walls of my room. Normally I would break out the ol' 9"x11" notebook and go to town but for this I knew it wouldn't cut it, I wanted something I could actually show off and look almost professional that wasn't a poster. 9"x11" is great because it easily fits on a scanner and you can shove it into your backpack or what have you with ease but I stepped up to 11"x14". I know it's not a huge jump in numbers but it's a pretty big jump in drawing terms, for me anyway.

I chose to do a portrait of Judy Garland because I wanted to create a vintage image but felt that Marilyn Monroe, Audrey Hepburn, Betty Davis, etc. were too overdone and there's a ton of posters and stuff for them out there but hardly any for Judy Garland in her later years. In case you don't know who she is she played Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz! That bright young lass who lead the children of the world over to somewhere over the rainbow without even having to show her boobs. Magical. She really is an interesting person who lived a hell of a life and I felt she deserved my small tribute.

These are my super expensive art tools. Mechanical pencil, sharpie, and wax paper.

I didn't think I was gonna ink this at first, to be honest I didn't know what I was doing other than drawing the outline.

The reference picture I had was the most legit I could find on Google Images and looked the easiest to draw.

The basic outline was done and I didn't feel like drawing surface maps or shapes so I started filling in the details a bit.

I've learned to start at the top and work my way down to keep from smearing the lead so much, the wax paper helps too of course. Come to think of it this is actually the first drawing I've used wax paper on...

By this point I knew I was going to ink this thing so instead of shading in the areas I knew would be black I just scribbled in them so I would remember to blacken them.

Happy little details.

Drawing is like building a house. You start with a foundation and then build up from there, adding layer upon layer until it doesn't look awful.

I was bored with penciling at this point and started inking. I was scared as all balls while doing this because unlike everything else I do I can't erase my inevitable screw up.

The face was especially scary.

Shading large areas with an ultra fine sharpie is really lame and tedious.

I hated Judy's lips by this point and chose to try my hand and making them less stupid.

God, that pillow took forever.

The hardest things in the world to draw are hands, hair, folds, and feathers. I hate them all.

By this point I knew I was almost done but I realized how fat her face looked. If I knew how to shade with ink this would be an easy fix as I knew just what the problem was. Too bad I don't.

This is just about done. After I tweaked the nose and added those lines to the background I spent about an hour working on the line of her face, trying to thin it out and make it look neat. I also adjusted the eyes and a few other things, mostly borders.

And done.

In all it took me four days until I was satisfied but I think it came out okay for someone who doesn't do this very often. Hope you enjoyed the show! Maybe Ryan's review will be done by the end of the week then we can push KS aside forever.