Today I meant with a person from Workforce Develop in my quest for gainful employment. We talked education, scholarships, seminars, and marketability.

I understand the concept of drawing a perspective employer’s attention to skills that he is looking for in filling a position. I know about the marketability game and try to play it, but I don’t like it. I am a “what you see is what you get kind of guy.”

I hated the search process that churches use when looking for pastors and I am in a whole new world in today’s job market. The ability, basic skills, and passion are all there to do many a job I have applied for, but I seem to be the only one who knows that. So, I play the game and I am studying the game to play it better.

One big problem is my pastoral job history. People don’t know what a pastor does and I think they have a reaction of irrelevance or fear toward one with a ministry background. Then I get to thinking how I invested a lot of time, money, and personal sacrifice to do something that wound up leaving me high and dry. So, it is a constant battle to maintain a good attitude and to stay encouraged.

Somehow things will work out and I will find out that I am not as deserted as I feel, but I sure could use some hope.

“Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one’s courage.”–Anais Nin

A few years ago I was interviewing for a job with the Christian owner of a company and in the course of the conversation it came time for me to explain `why I was no longer a pastor. It is a heart wrenching story for me to tell, even though I have told it scores of times and even have different versions for different occasions. So, I poured out my heart, telling my sad tale, to which he replied, “Oh well, life goes on, right?”

I wanted to kill him on the spot.

He was insensitive, but he was right.

My journey has taken me to a place of disillusionment that eventually gave way to some anger when I realized that I bought into something that was no longer a suitable avenue for me to express my faith and gifts. Along the way I earned a freedom from the system that helped me to see things more objectively, but eventually I came face-to-face with a huge vacuum of “Now what’s?”

Now what do I do to make a living? Now what do we do about church? Now what about all of those relationships that seem to have changed so drastically? Now what do I do about the overwhelming sense of calling that used to drive me? Now what do I even want to do?

More on Communitas Collective: Survivor

First of all our Upper Midwestern, Lake Michigan weather has sucked. It just turned warm a couple of weeks ago and it is warmer in Minnesota than it is here.

Then, there were a couple much anticipated events, the launch of Communitas Collective and our first ever big family vacation to Tybee Island Georgia. These were dreams that I finally realized and I enjoyed them, but they didn’t fix everything (or anything) that was churning around within me.

Just what is churning within me? Well, I need a job and I have decided after losing the last job that it is time to figure out what I am going to be doing the rest of my life and take whatever steps necessary to achieve those goals. I am doing that, but it is a slow process and without any real promises. Then there is the issue of a possible move in the not too distant future to look after ailing family members in Missouri. These things are all like puzzle pieces that need to be put together, but I don’t have the box with the picture. So, I keep plugging away, finding it hard to maintain a consistent motivation, let alone encouragement.

But I always get back up.

I love the blues and all, but I am getting tired of this same old song.

Here are a few pics from some favorite places close to home.

Kenosha, Wisconsin has an incredible water front along Lake Michigan. I ride my bike there a lot and we take walks and dine along the lakefront. These are some cell phone pictures of the Pennoyer Park band shell where the Kenosha Pops plays during the Summer.

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We had an awesome tine last Saturday at the Strawberry Festival in Cedarburg, Wisconsin, a cool little historic town north of Milwaukee. I indulged in an ear of roasted corn, a chocolate coverstrawberry, and some strawberry wine.

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North Point Marina is the largest inland marina in the United States and it is right here in our sleepy little bedroom town of Winthrop Harbor, IL. Here are some cloudy day cell phone pics.

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Last night, thanks to good friends and season ticket holders, Christy and Cory. I visited only my second ever MLB park and witnessed the Brewers trounce the Mets. Miller is an awesome park. Here are a few cell phone pics before the battery died.

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Vacation was a good combination of family, beach, and a great house. We were the third house from the beach on Tybee Island with a beach access right on our street. Our home was spacious and we utilized our three level porch and hot tub. It was even interesting to see all of the preparation for the filming of the Miley Cyrus movie on the island. Some of the most enjoyable things for me were:

The amazing beach, of course

A dolphin excursion boat ride

Sitting on the porch and in the hot tub

Watching Grand Torino and playing cards.

Visiting the King Center in Atlanta

Touring the Ryman Auditorium in Nashville

Eating at the Crab Shack

More photos here

The entire family, including our adult children and grandson are all going on vacation together.  We hardly ever take real vacations, so this is a big deal.  We have rented a beach house on Tybee Island (Savannah, Georgia’s beach).  Yesterday I found out that Miley Cyrus is going to begin filming a movie there next week!

All I have to say is, She better not get in the way of our enjoying our vacation!  (As you can imagine I am not a big fan of Hannah Montana.)

I may not be blogging much for awhile, but will be back in ten days.

Adieu

Wow, I have been so darn busy getting Communitas Collective going, I have hardly had time for anything else, including, writing here, with the exception of letting you know what’s going on over at Communitas.

CC is off to a really good start, with a lot of people joining out networks on the site, Facebook, and Twitter. Thank you for checking us out.

This is a huge project because it has so many pieces and several people are involved in developing, leading, and writing, but it already is feeling like it has been worth all of the work.

Keep checking back because there will be at least three new posts on each of the three blogs every week.

Here what has been posted so far:

Sanctuary

• A Bridge to…  Somewhere by Erin Word
• Bunny Trouble by Cindy Bryan

Verve

• Verve?  What The Heck Is Verve? by Gary Means
• Dreams Are Much Prettier When They Are just Dreams by Kathy Escobar

Survivor

• The Outsider by Glenn Hager
• Rock Star by Cory Sanders

Click here!

Finally, the new launch date is at hand and tomorrow the new ministry that seeks to encourage people who are finding new ways to be the church is going live.

With all of the networks out there, I have re-thought the whole concept of what we are doing and that reinforced the uniquenesses of this project.

We are not selling anything… not even a perspective on how to be the church. Instead, we are trying to help people discover what God wants them to do and encourage and facilitate that process.

We are helping people through transitions. When you find yourself at odds with something you used to love and be deeply emerged in, it is disconcerting. The transition away from the institutional church is unsettling and the future is totally vague. So, we are trying to walk with people through that process.

We are developing a community. I call people like us who used to be a part of the institutional church and who are trying to figure out what is next, church refugees. Many of us have been rather isolated. So, I hope that we can become a gathering place where people can find resources and one another.

I pray that we can be a part of what God is doing in the world today and be helpful to a lot of people.

Patty and her Aunt Twila (taken yesterday)

What do I say to a woman who has given me her heart and devoted her life to our life together?

I love you!

Happy 35^th Anniversary!