Aries (March 21–April 19)

As the first sign of the zodiac, you’re a natural starter, Aries. Ruled by energetic Mars, you’re at your best when there’s a challenge to conquer, a goal to chase or someplace new to go. Unfortunately, adult life involves an awful lot of maintenance. Paying bills, doing laundry and having the same meeting every Tuesday can make an Aries want to crawl out of their skin.

If you’re in a rut, don’t try to transform yourself into someone who loves routine. Instead, give yourself something new to conquer. At work, volunteer for a project that stretches your skills, pitch an idea or set a goal with a finish line you can actually see. If your relationship feels stale, plan a date that gets both of you off the couch. Take a boxing class, go hiking or make a reservation at that restaurant across town you’ve been dying to try.

You can even turn mundane chores into a competition with yourself. Set a timer for 30 minutes, put on some music and see how much you can knock out before the buzzer. And remember: Your ability to compete in the financial world should inspire you too.

The pitfall? You can mistake boredom for failure. Before quitting a job, abandoning a goal or deciding a relationship has run its course, ask yourself whether you really want out or simply need a fresh challenge within the life you already have.

Taurus (April 20–May 20)

Taurus is an earth sign ruled by Venus, the planet associated with beauty, pleasure and love, and you need a life that feels good in the real, tangible world. A beautiful home, delicious food, financial security and people you can count on aren’t frivolous extras for you—they’re what you need to feel grounded. So when life gets off track, start with your physical environment. Clean out the refrigerator, buy fresh sheets, cook yourself a real meal or finally deal with that pile of stuff you’ve been stepping around for three months. Don’t underestimate how much changing your surroundings can change your mood. And pay special attention to color palettes.

Money is another important piece of the Taurus puzzle. You crave security, so vague financial goals can create unnecessary anxiety. Pick something concrete: Pay off a credit card, save a specific amount or set aside money for a vacation you can already picture yourself taking. Automating your savings can help, because once a good Taurus habit takes root, it tends to stay there.

The same goes for relationships. You value loyalty, but that can sometimes keep you in situations long after their expiration date. Your famous stubborn streak is wonderful when you’re building something worthwhile; it’s less useful when you’re hanging on simply because change feels uncomfortable. Ask yourself: Does this still make my life better, or am I just used to it?

Gemini (May 21–June 20)

Quick-thinking Gemini is ruled by Mercury, the planet associated with communication, and your mind needs stimulation. You’re curious, witty and full of ideas. But when every day starts looking exactly like the one before it, your energy can take a nosedive. Your reset word is variety. If work feels dull, ask to take on a different responsibility, work somewhere new for an afternoon or schedule lunch with a colleague who always gets your brain buzzing. If you’ve been thinking about taking a class, learning a language or starting a hobby, do it. Your curiosity isn’t a distraction from your adult life; it’s one of the things that keeps you engaged with it!

Your relationships need variety as well. Call the friend you haven’t talked to in six months. Plan a weekend road trip. Ask your partner a question you’ve never asked before. Gemini is the communicator of the zodiac, and talking things out often helps you figure out what you actually want.

But watch your tendency to scatter your energy: 12 exciting ideas can quickly become 12 unfinished projects. Choose one thing you want to change this month, and follow it through before chasing the next shiny object.

Cancer (June 21–July 22)

Home really is where the heart is for Cancer. You’re sensitive, intuitive and deeply connected to family and the people you consider family, so when your home life feels chaotic, everything else can feel off too. Begin your reset there. You don’t need a magazine-worthy makeover. Clear one room that’s become cluttered, create a comfortable place to eat dinner, or establish a little corner where you can read, think or drink your morning coffee without interruption. If you work remotely, make sure you have a dedicated workspace so your job doesn’t ooze into every inch of your sanctuary.

Cancer also has a tremendous instinct for nurturing others. That makes you the person others call when they’re upset, sick or simply need someone to listen. Yes, it’s lovely in many ways, but being everyone’s emotional emergency room can leave you depleted. Spend time working out, or head to a spa for a reset.

Try putting one appointment with yourself on your calendar every week and treating it as seriously as you would a commitment to someone you love. And if you’re worried about money, create a small emergency fund, even if you start with just a few dollars every week. Security gives Cancer room to breathe.

One word of warning: Don’t confuse caring with caretaking. Sometimes the most loving thing you can say is: “I can’t do that today.”

Leo (July 23–Aug. 22)

Leo is ruled by the Sun, and you’re here to shine. That doesn’t mean every Leo wants to become famous, of course. It means you need opportunities to express yourself, create and feel that what you contribute actually matters.

If you’ve been going through the motions, ask yourself where you’ve become an understudy in your own life. At work, stop quietly doing excellent work and hoping somebody notices. Speak up in the meeting, apply for the promotion or show your boss what you’ve accomplished. In your personal life, revive something that makes you feel creative, whether that’s singing, decorating, dancing or hosting a fabulous dinner.

Relationships are important to warmhearted Leo, and appreciation matters too. But rather than stewing because somebody hasn’t noticed everything you do, tell them what you need. And make sure you’re giving that appreciation back.

The pitfall you need to watch out for? Looking outside yourself for applause. Likes, compliments and recognition feel wonderful, but they can’t be your only fuel source. Pick one goal that would make you proud, even if nobody else knew you accomplished it. That’s the kind of spotlight that never gets switched off. To keep that perspective top of mind, put an inspirational quote on your fridge to light you up every day.

Virgo (Aug. 23–Sept. 22)

Virgo is the gardener in my astrology system, and that image tells you a lot about how this practical earth sign operates. You’re brilliant at tending things, whether that means improving a project, organizing a household, helping a friend or figuring out why the dishwasher is making that weird noise. The trouble begins when everything starts looking like it needs improvement, including you.

If your life feels overwhelming, resist the urge to overhaul the whole thing. Pick three things that genuinely need your attention. Maybe it’s making a doctor’s appointment you’ve postponed, creating a workable monthly budget and clearing your desk so you can actually see it again. Then stop. You do not need a 47-item self-improvement plan.

At work, decide which tasks actually move a project forward instead of polishing every detail. At home, create simple routines that eliminate recurring annoyances. Put your keys in the same place. Schedule automatic bill payments. Make a basic meal plan. And in relationships, remember that the people you love aren’t projects. Sometimes they want your company, not your excellent suggestions.

Warning: Watch out for perfectionism masquerading as productivity. “Better” is often good enough. Let the garden grow.

Libra (Sept. 23–Oct. 22)

Libra is the zodiac’s great relationship sign. Ruled by Venus, you have a natural ability to see another person’s point of view, create harmony and make people feel comfortable. Those are fantastic adulting skills, right up until you become so busy considering everyone else that you lose track of what you want. So your reset begins with a decision. Choose something you’ve been endlessly weighing, and give yourself a deadline. Which vacation should you take? Do you want the new job? Which sofa should you buy? Gather the information you need, sleep on it and decide. No additional committee meetings required.

This applies to relationships too. Before asking your partner, best friend, mother and group chat what they think, ask yourself first. Write down your answer if you need to. You might be surprised by how quickly it comes. At work, practice stating your opinion before hearing everyone else’s. With money, create a personal spending category that you control without anybody else’s input.

Your gift for compromise is precious, but compromise only works when you bring your own desires to the table. Otherwise, you aren’t meeting someone halfway; you’re simply walking over to their side.

Scorpio (Oct. 23–Nov. 21)

Scorpio is the shaman in my astrology system, since this sign is associated with transformation, depth and rebirth. You have a remarkable ability to reinvent yourself, but first you have to be willing to let something die. Don’t panic—we’re talking metaphorically!

If you feel stuck in life, take inventory of what you’ve outgrown. Is there a friendship that exists mostly because you’ve known each other forever? A job that once challenged you but now drains you? A closet full of possessions belonging to a version of yourself you left behind years ago? Pick one area and purge. Delete the apps you never use. Donate the clothes. Cancel the subscription. Have the conversation you’ve been avoiding. Update the résumé. Money deserves the same fearless examination. Look at your accounts, debts and spending instead of avoiding whatever makes you uncomfortable. Scorpio does surprisingly well when the truth is out in the open because then you can do something about it.

Just don’t confuse transformation with destruction. You don’t have to burn down your whole life to change it. Sometimes removing one dead branch is enough to let new growth through. And for you, the most expansive growth will be in your romantic relationships.

Sagittarius (Nov. 22–Dec. 21)

Sagittarius is the explorer of the zodiac. Ruled by Jupiter, you thrive on adventure, learning and the feeling that life contains possibilities you haven’t discovered yet. When you feel trapped, your first instinct may be to book a ticket somewhere far away. And if you can afford the trip, go! Travel can be genuinely restorative for Sagittarius.

But expansion doesn’t require an airport. Take a class in something you know nothing about. Visit a neighborhood you’ve never explored. Go to a museum alone. Invite someone with a completely different background to lunch. At work, look for opportunities to teach, travel, present or acquire a new skill. Your enthusiasm returns when your world gets bigger.

Money requires a little more discipline. Your optimism can persuade you that future-you will somehow take care of whatever present-you puts on the credit card. Create a separate travel or adventure fund, and use that money guilt-free. In relationships, make sure freedom goes both ways. You need room to roam, but so do the people you love.

Remember, though: The answer doesn’t always lie somewhere else. Before escaping your current life, see whether you can grow within it.

Capricorn (Dec. 22–Jan. 19)

Capricorn, you are built for adulting. You’re ambitious, practical and naturally aware that worthwhile things take time. Give you a mountain and you’ll start figuring out the route to the summit while everyone else is still discussing footwear. But capable Capricorn can end up carrying far too much.

If your life needs a reset, choose your most important mountain. Maybe you want to buy a home, change careers, get out of debt or finally finish a degree. Write down the goal, break it into smaller milestones and put actual dates beside them. You’re at your best when progress is measurable and when you work one step at a time, in a grounded way. Then look at everything else you’re doing and decide what can wait. Being responsible doesn’t mean volunteering to carry every responsibility in sight. This is especially important in families and relationships, where Capricorn can quietly become the CEO, CFO and facilities manager. Delegate. Ask for help. Let someone else make dinner badly.

Your pitfall is postponing happiness until you reach the next milestone. Schedule pleasure with the same seriousness you schedule work. There will always be another mountain.

Aquarius (Jan. 20–Feb. 18)

Independent Aquarius is the zodiac’s innovator. You’re interested in what’s next, what’s possible and how things could work differently. So why are you still living according to a rule you stopped believing in five years ago? You are an air sign, and your inventive mind is your greatest gift. Look around for a “should.” You should have this kind of career. You should spend weekends this way. You should own a house by a certain age. You should have a particular kind of relationship. Then ask yourself who made that rule.

At work, experiment with technology or a new system that eliminates something tedious. If your schedule isn’t working, rearrange it. In your social life, seek out people who share your interests rather than maintaining friendships solely because you’ve known someone forever.

Aquarius is also associated with groups and community, so if you’ve become isolated, join something. Volunteer for a cause, find a local organization or seek out people who are fascinated by the same wonderfully obscure thing you are.

Just don’t rebel for the sake of rebellion. A conventional solution isn’t automatically a bad one. Keep the rules that work; toss the ones that don’t.

Pisces (Feb. 19–March 20)

Dreamy Pisces is imaginative, intuitive and creative. You can picture possibilities other people don’t see, which is an extraordinary gift. The adulting problem arrives when those possibilities remain beautiful little movies playing inside your head. Your reset is to make one dream concrete. Want to write a book? Set a weekly page goal. Dreaming of Paris? Open a vacation account and automatically deposit money into it every payday. Want a different career? Spend one hour this week researching what training you would actually need. Creativity becomes powerful when you give it a container.

Your environment matters too. Pisces absorbs atmosphere easily, so create spaces that help you feel calm and inspired. Music, water, art, meditation or simply taking a walk without your phone can help you clear out other people’s noise and hear your own thoughts again. And remember: Relationships require boundaries. Your empathy can make somebody else’s crisis feel like your responsibility. Before rushing in to rescue someone, ask whether they actually need your help and whether you genuinely have the energy to give it.

Your pitfall is waiting for inspiration, rescue or the perfect moment. Put one date on the calendar, and take one practical step. Dreams need feet.

Check out Jill Dearman’s new book, Super-Powered Astrology: Four Steps to a New You for a New Astrological Age, out now.

Why trust us

Reader’s Digest provides an easy-to-understand guide to all things astrology—from understanding sun signs, moon signs and rising signs to exploring each zodiac sign’s strengths, challenges and desires. You’ll learn about your ideal match in love, career, hobbies and more, as well as learn how big astrological events will affect you. We’re committed to producing high-quality content by writers with expertise and experience in their field in consultation with relevant, qualified experts. We rely on reputable primary sources, including practicing astrologers, as well as our writers’ personal experiences where appropriate. For this piece on how to adult based on your zodiac sign, Jill Dearman tapped her 20-plus years of experience as an astrologer. We verify all facts and data, back them with credible sourcing and revisit them over time to ensure they remain accurate and up to date. Read more about our team, our contributors and our editorial policies.

The post Here’s How to Adult the Right Way and Get Your Life on Track, According to Your Zodiac Sign appeared first on Reader's Digest.

The list ahead includes practical picks, sentimental treasures and a few items we didn’t see coming. Some will make perfect sense the second you read them. Others may have you thinking, Wait, that’s what you can’t live without?! And they will definitely all prompt you to consider of your own must-haves.

Read on to discover the nostalgic and wonderfully relatable things our readers can’t live without, along with the heartwarming stories that make them so special.

Get Reader’s Digest’s Read Up newsletter for more true stories, fun facts, humor, cleaning, travel and tech all week long.

All you need

My needle and thread. They’re two things, but one doesn’t work without the other. My hands are always busy creating: in my sewing room, in the car, on vacation, in waiting rooms. But the most special times with my needle and thread were in the evenings when my late husband and I would sit in our chairs and watch TV while I sewed. He was always the biggest fan of whatever I was working on. After he died, it took a while before I could pick up my needle and thread. I’m creating again, but tears come easy when I look at his chair, and I still hold up what I’m working on and turn to his chair to “show him.” —Steven Cook, Eagle River, Alaska 

Pencil pusher

As long as there are ideas and mistakes and I have the ability to change my mind, I need pencils with good erasers. I keep them in my workroom, my car and my crossword book, and by my bed. I use them to keep my changing calendar of dinner dates and my grandson’s baseball games, make to-do lists, jot down promises. A pencil allows me to be an imaginative, but fallible, human being. —Mirjam Spaar, Severna Park, Maryland 

Joe on the go

Many people say they can’t live without coffee, but I take it to the extreme. I carry a coffee maker with me wherever I travel. When I worked as a flight attendant, I spent many nights in hotels and couldn’t risk going without that morning cup. My fix—no pun intended—came from the smallest coffee­ maker that I could pack into my crew bag. It was a single-brew machine that worked magic every morning. —Amber Jensen-Veney, Blairsville, Georgia 

Drawing the line

I’ve worn heavy black eyeliner ever since I was a teenager. I was enthralled by characters on shows like Bewitched, Star Trek and I Dream of Jeannie. My kids always told me to tone it down. I’d tell them I must have lived in Egypt in a past life. Once, I visited my daughter while wearing just a hint of eyeliner, sans my signature black wings. She didn’t even notice! Needless to say, I went right back to my winged eyeliner and haven’t looked back. —Linda Vassallo, Gorham, Maine 

The unforgettable moments

I couldn’t live without my memories. Glimpses of long-ago days in a totally different world from today—a simpler time with loved ones, friends and pets who are now long gone. Hopes, dreams, disappointments, childhood adventures. All that learning, living, loving. They’re all memories now, and I’m grateful to have them, even the bad ones. —Jan Wolf, Fort Pierce, Florida 

The missing piece

Before COVID-19, I hadn’t put together a jigsaw puzzle in years. But since, I’ve completed 169 of them, usually while watching TV, listening to audiobooks or participating in conference calls with the video off. I feel naked if there is not a puzzle in progress, or a new box on the table. —Pat Fridgen, Greencastle, Pennsylvania  

I hear that

More than 45 years ago, I told my (not-quite-yet) wife that I needed to bring two things into the marriage: my dog and my stereo. Those were deal-breakers. Bullet wasn’t a problem, since everyone loved him. My stereo, however, included two speakers the size of mini-fridges. Being so large, they can’t go just anywhere, but they did go everywhere I went. Today, our beloved Bullet is gone, but my wife and my speakers are both still in excellent condition and a consistent source of enjoyment … and I love them BOTH. —Ron Enners, Bolivia, North Carolina 

Michelin possible

On my fridge, you’ll find a weekly menu. (E.g., “Monday: Vegetable soup. Tuesday: Fish and rice.”) I started it to keep me on top of meal prep and scheduling when my kids began extracurriculars and I was working part time. I still write up a new one every Sunday, even though our kids have moved out. —Becky Bores, Monroeville, Ohio 

Picture perfect

As a photographer, I feel lost without a camera nearby, whether it’s a professional DSLR, a small point-and-shoot or even a phone camera. Photography is so much a part of me that on my wedding day, I slipped a small camera into my suit pocket, and at the end of the ceremony, I took a selfie of us and all our guests. The guests all knew about my passion, and uproarious laughter erupted when I pulled the camera out. The image I took remains one of my favorite photos of the wedding. —Michael Leonard, Yarmouth, Maine 

Why trust us

At Reader’s Digest, we’re committed to producing high-quality content by writers with expertise and experience in their field in consultation with relevant, qualified experts. We rely on reputable primary sources, including government and professional organizations and academic institutions as well as our writers’ personal experiences where appropriate. We verify all facts and data, back them with credible sourcing and revisit them over time to ensure they remain accurate and up to date. Read more about our team, our contributors and our editorial policies.

The Best Purchases Readers Ever Made

The Sweetest First-Date Stories

The Funniest Vacation Stories

The post Our Readers Share the Things They Can’t Live Without—And They’re Totally Relatable appeared first on Reader's Digest.

This year, we found a very special place to commemorate our 10th Year Special: Liverpool, New York! This tiny village near Syracuse has a heart the size of a city, and its people truly inspire us.

Read on for more about Liverpool—along with the rest of 2026’s finalists—and see how we spent 24 hours in the Nicest Place in America.

Get Reader’s Digest’s Read Up newsletter for more heartwarming stories, fun facts, humor, cleaning, travel and tech all week long. 

Meet Our 2026 Winner

A Tiny Village in New York Spread Charity Far and Wide—And Became 2026’s Nicest Place in America

This year’s top honor goes to … Liverpool, New York! Find out how a mission to help strangers thousands of miles away has grown into a community where lending a hand is simply a way of life.

Click here to read all about it.

Spend a Little Time in 2026’s Nicest Place in America

What can you learn about a place in a single day? When it’s a tiny town packed with amazing people, a whole lot. Visit Liverpool with us below!

Check Out the 2026 Finalists

• The Book Thing in Baltimore, Maryland
• Heretic Coffee Co. in Portland, Oregon
• Swanville, Minnesota
• Charleston, Arkansas

Meet Our Judges

Meet Our Past Winners

See where all 154 of our Nicest Places land on this map, and read the stories below to find out more about the ones that took home the top honor.

2025 Winner: Asheville, North Carolina

2024 Winner: Provo, Utah

2023 Winner: Buffalo, New York

2022 Winner: Coulterville, California

2021 Winner: The Quality Inn in Kodak, Tennessee

2020 Winner: Buchanan, Michigan

2019 Winner: Columbiana, Ohio

2018 Winner: Yassir Falafel House in Knoxville, Tennessee

2017 Winner: Gallatin, Tennessee

Add a Dose of Niceness to Your World

11 Ways to Turn Your Community into One of the Nicest Places in America

Building a strong community depends on you, and we can help. Click here for some tangible—and surprisingly easy!—tips on how to make your hometown a place you can truly call home.

Time to Plan Your Nicest Vacation Yet! Here’s Your Guide to All of Reader’s Digest’s Nicest Places in America Winners

Ten years of our Nicest Places franchise means 10 amazing places to visit! Check out where to stay and what to do while you’re there.

Find Your People

• Why Community Is So Important—And How to Find Yours
• When the World Is a Mess, Your Community Can Save Your Sanity—Here’s How
• How to Make Friends as an Adult—And Keep Them
• They Found Belonging Through Chosen Family—And You Can Too
• How to Get More Out of Your Daily Interactions to Feel Happier and More Connected
• Here’s How to Build Empathy and Form Deeper Connections

Nominate Your Nicest Place!

Why trust us

For more than 100 years, Reader’s Digest has been known for its heartwarming true stories and focus on community. In 2017, we launched the Nicest Places in America, an annual contest that honors kind, inspiring people making a difference in their hometowns. Readers send in nominations, and Reader’s Digest’s editorial team vets the entries and whittles them down with the help of a panel of judges. This year, the judges included Today co-anchor Craig Melvin, Tuesdays with Morrie author Mitch Albom, author and podcast host Mónica Guzmán, StoryCorps CEO Sandra Clark, and Molly Irani, the co-founder of Chai Pani Restaurant Group in Asheville, North Carolina, which was 2025’s Nicest Place in America. We are committed to producing high-quality content by writers with expertise and experience in their field in consultation with relevant, qualified experts. Read more about our team, our contributors and our editorial policies.

The post And the Winner of 2026’s “Nicest Places in America” Search Is … appeared first on Reader's Digest.

When we arrived, the parking lot was empty. Not “offseason quiet” empty— more like “the last guests left under mysterious circumstances and nobody came after them” empty. The lobby carpet was torn up in patches. The hallways were dim and echoey. And the indoor water park, advertised with glistening slides and splashing families, consisted of exactly one broken slide standing in an otherwise empty pool. My kids’ faces broke my heart. The concierge was pleasant enough. She advised us to just wander the halls and pick whatever room looked good to us. So we chose the least creepy option, pushed the bureau in front of the door before bed, and left first thing in the morning.

That day, I wrote the only one-star review I have ever left in my life. It was two pages long and included photos. I went with equal parts scathing and cautionary. A few months later, I went back to see if the hotel had responded. Instead, I found that it had permanently closed. Part of me wonders whether my review was the final nail in the coffin.

But was leaving it actually the right thing to do? I’ve been thinking about it ever since, because the etiquette of negative reviews is genuinely murky, and the stakes can be higher than most of us realize.

Get Reader’s Digest’s Read Up newsletter for more etiquette, tech, holiday tips, fun facts, humor and travel all week long.

The case for leaving a one-star review

The most obvious argument for a negative review is that you were asked and the service was truly terrible. Every time you visit a business, Google, Yelp, Amazon and everyone else wants to know how it went. We’ve built an entire consumer infrastructure around the premise that honest feedback is valuable.

So staying silent when you have had a genuinely terrible experience seems, if anything, like failing your civic duty. There weren’t any reviews of the hotel when I booked our trip (which should have been my first red flag), and they would have been so useful. The data backs this up: 94% of consumers say a negative review has convinced them to avoid a business.

Reviews are how strangers protect one another. When a hotel advertises a water park and delivers one sad slide in a drained pool, that’s not a minor inconvenience—it’s actually a misrepresentation. Plus, honest negative reviews can benefit businesses. A consistent pattern of one-star complaints about cold food is information that the management can act on. Silence isn’t kindness; it’s useless.

The case against it

OK, but … a single one-star review can also do lasting, disproportionate ­damage to a small business. Especially if it’s exaggerated (as can happen when you write in the heat of the moment). A landmark Harvard Business School study found that a one-star drop on Yelp translates to a 5% to 9% revenue loss. And industry estimates suggest it takes roughly 40 positive customer experiences to claw back the reputational damage of just one negative review. For a small business operating on thin margins, that revenue loss could represent payroll, rent and the owner’s ability to keep the lights on.

Also, many of the issues stem from circumstances that no individual employee created. One terrible visit, driven by a broken system or an understaffed night, may not represent the whole story. Leaving a permanent, public indictment based on a single bad day can feel less like accountability and more like collateral damage.

When it stops being feedback

It’s also worth noting that online review culture has developed a genuinely ugly side that has nothing to do with honest consumer feedback and everything to do with online bullying.

In 2025, a James Beard–nominated San Francisco chef found his restaurant review-bombed into closure after a dispute with a TikToker went viral. Hundreds of thousands of people who had never set foot in his restaurant, never tasted his food, never interacted with a single member of his staff flooded his Google page with one-star reviews because an influencer told them to. His employees were laid off, he lost his livelihood and his restaurant closed. And that’s just one example of many.

This is not etiquette; this is bullying. And it is one of the worst things happening in online culture right now. A review is supposed to be your honest account of your own experience. The moment you leave a one-star review for a business you’ve never visited, you’re not holding anyone accountable. You are, however, weaponizing hate. A review platform is not a pitchfork, and treating it like one doesn’t make you an activist—it makes you incredibly rude.

The verdict

Here’s what I’ve settled on: A one-star review is appropriate when the problem was systemic, significant and likely to happen to the next person. Not because your server was having a hard shift. Not because your food arrived slightly cold during a Saturday-night rush. When there is genuine misrepresentation involved or consistent, recurring failures, you are not being rude. And I will say that given this rubric, I’ve never left another one-star review.

If you’re going to leave a one-star review, there are a few practical rules. Be specific, not mean. Describe what happened rather than what you think of the person who served you. Don’t write it in the heat of your emotions. And before you post anything, consider calling the business directly. A surprising number of problems get resolved this way, and a business willing to make it right deserves the opportunity. If they don’t respond, you will feel considerably better about that one star. Leaving a one-star review is not inherently rude—but the bar should be meaningfully higher than “I was mildly inconvenienced on a Tuesday.”

My two-page review of the haunted water park hotel, with its empty pool and bureau-against-the-door energy? One hundred percent warranted. I regret nothing. If I saved even one family from driving three hours to stand in a dark lobby choosing a room like contestants on Squid Game, that was a public service.

Have a social situation you can’t stop ruminating on? Email us at advice@tmbi.com, or message Charlotte on Instagram at @CharlotteHiltonAndersen.

Why trust us

Reader’s Digest has published hundreds of etiquette stories that help readers navigate communication in a changing world. We regularly cover topics such as the best messages to send for any occasion, polite habits that aren’t as polite as they seem, email and texting etiquette, business etiquette, tipping etiquette, travel etiquette and more. We’re committed to producing high-quality content by writers with expertise and experience in their field in consultation with relevant, qualified experts. We rely on reputable primary sources, including government and professional organizations and academic institutions as well as our writers’ personal experiences where appropriate. We verify all facts and data, back them with credible sourcing and revisit them over time to ensure they remain accurate and up to date. Read more about our team, our contributors and our editorial policies.

Is It Rude Not to Invite Your Entire Friend Group Out?

Is It Rude to Skip Small Talk and Get to the Point?

Is It Rude to Post a Photo Without Asking?

The post Is It Really Rude to Leave a One-Star Review? appeared first on Reader's Digest.

“It’s a vibe, I would say, of quiet excitement,” says Rahul Jakati, a writing instructor who signed up to volunteer after his first visit and has since dedicated more than 300 hours of service. “The Book Thing is one of the hearts of Baltimore because books are literally just coming in, circulating into this warehouse organ and then being pumped back out, reoxygenating the literary landscape of Baltimore,” he says. “That’s its own kind of circulation, a circulation of goodwill.”

Get Reader’s Digest’s Read Up newsletter for more of the Nicest Places in America, heartwarming stories, fun facts, humor, cleaning, travel and tech all week long. 

A beloved Baltimore tradition

The Book Thing of Baltimore began in 1995 when bartender Russell Wattenberg started giving away books after hearing from local teachers who came to his bar and shared that they needed books for their students. What began as a small act of generosity gradually grew into one of Baltimore’s most beloved institutions, typically held on the second weekend of the month.

In 2017, after a fire, the community came together to salvage the inventory that could be saved. The nearby Peabody Heights Brewery even put up shelves to house the titles that could be given out. Today, visitors line up for timed entry slots and receive nearly an hour to browse. Donations arrive by the thousands, according to board president Christopher Mergen. “We may get anywhere from 12,000 to 17,000 books a month as donations, and to process all of those is a really remarkable feat of engineering,” he says.

Volunteers unload boxes from trunks and pickup trucks, sort them, stamp them with the message “not for resale” and shelve them in categories. There are books on etiquette, “oddball” books, a section of large-print books and another of “teeny-tiny” books. One woman gave her whole set of Sweet Valley High books: “That’s a part of my teenage life,” she told a volunteer.

“It’s a place that just exists in spite of all the reasons that it shouldn’t exist,” says Mergen. “Baltimore has a reputation for being a bit quirky. It’s a scrappy sort of do-it-yourself type of place.”

Giving stories a second chapter

The Book Thing is in Waverly, a neighborhood that captures much of that offbeat, plucky spirit. On Saturdays, visitors drift between the nearby farmers market, brick row houses, coffee shops and independent businesses. The surrounding area has long been a place where literature matters. The Edgar Allan Poe House & Museum, a national historic landmark, is just a few miles away. Journalist and essayist H.L. Mencken chronicled his life in Baltimore, and F. Scott Fitzgerald lived there for several years in the 1930s.

On one giveaway day, volunteers stationed at the entrance greeted arriving patrons by clapping and dancing as they walked through the door. A visually impaired woman arrived with a friend, planning to wait outside while her companion browsed. Volunteers saw her, searched the media section and were delighted to discover an audiobook on CD that she had been interested in.

Another visitor arrived on a donation day with books from her late mother’s estate. As volunteers counted the donations, she asked if they would truly reach people who wanted them. Then, with tears in her eyes, she explained how much it meant to know that her mother’s library would find a new home.

“The Book Thing doesn’t discriminate. It sees value in all books and all people. Sometimes you go just for fun; sometimes you look for something specific; sometimes you go to meet other people who love books as much as you do,” says Baltimore native Violet LeVoit, who nominated it. “In a world where everything is monetized and every little scrap of human existence has a dollar sign attached to it, this is a place where the books are free, but the people are free too.”

A sanctuary for book lovers and storytellers

For Devina Bhalla, a local English teacher, the greatest experience she had at The Book Thing wasn’t simply finding a great read. When she first moved to the area and barely knew anyone, a fellow teacher told her it was the “most special thing about Baltimore.” And so the literary hub became one of the first places where she felt ­connected—not only to reading, but to Baltimore itself.

She introduced her boyfriend, Colin Kennedy, to the place, and the two often went together. Last year, on one of their visits, he got down on one knee and proposed right there in front of the shelves. Nobody who knew the couple was surprised. “One of my most favorite things was how many people in my life were like, ‘Oh, it’s just so right that Colin proposed there,’ ” she says.

Stories like that are why people talk about The Book Thing not merely as a book warehouse or a free store. They talk about friendship, belonging and generosity. Bhalla puts it this way: “If there was somebody in the world that was dis­illusioned with humanity, this would be the place you could take them to be like, ‘Humans can do some beautiful things too.’ ”

Why trust us

For more than 100 years, Reader’s Digest has been known for its heartwarming true stories and focus on community. In 2017, we launched the Nicest Places in America, an annual contest that honors kind, inspiring people making a difference in their hometowns. Readers send in nominations, and Reader’s Digest’s editorial team vets the entries and whittles them down with the help of a panel of judges. This year, the judges included Today co-anchor Craig Melvin, Tuesdays with Morrie author Mitch Albom, author and podcast host Mónica Guzmán, StoryCorps CEO Sandra Clark, and Molly Irani, the co-founder of Chai Pani Restaurant Group in Asheville, North Carolina, which was 2025’s Nicest Place in America. We are committed to producing high-quality content by writers with expertise and experience in their field in consultation with relevant, qualified experts. Read more about our team, our contributors and our editorial policies.

How Monroe, Louisiana, Turned Loss into Purpose

This Amateur Circus Brings Joy to Its Community

How Provo, Utah, Became the Nicest Place in America

The post A Baltimore Warehouse Gives Away Thousands of Free Books Every Year—And Keeps the Love of Reading Circulating appeared first on Reader's Digest.

Inside, the cafe was already at full speed. Espresso machines hissing over overlapping voices. Hastily wrapped burritos handed over the counter. People young and old, some sporting tattoos and mohawks, others in their Sunday best, all packed inside to accept the helping hand that had been extended.

“There was never even a line before, and all of a sudden I was spending an entire day looking at a line,” says Peitrok.

Get Reader’s Digest’s Read Up newsletter for more of the Nicest Places in America, heartwarming stories, fun facts, humor, cleaning, travel and tech all week long.

How it all began

Heretic founder Josh White remembers the day last October when he read the announcement that SNAP, the federal program that helps low-income households buy groceries, would be cut off starting Nov. 1 during a government shutdown, leaving millions unsure how they would make ends meet. “I was like, ‘Well, that’s not right,’ ” says White. “We sell breakfast burritos, and people will be going hungry, so why not just give those away for free until SNAP is reinstated?”

He posted a message on the cafe’s social media inviting anyone affected by the SNAP cuts to come in for a free burrito and coffee. In just hours, the message spread far beyond Heretic’s usual audience, and donations topping $10,000 poured in. Two days later, on Oct. 27, a boy about 10 years old came in and asked if he could get a free SNAP breakfast early.

Horrified, White decided to open the program immediately. He posted again, saying: “No child should EVER have to ask for food. Portland, come eat. Do not go hungry.” The shop opened its doors and brought on that busy day when Peitrok and other volunteer baristas slung coffees and burritos to more than 100 people.

Brewing bright futures

But Heretic’s generosity far predates the SNAP breakfast program. Founded in 2023, the cafe is a nonprofit organization focused on workforce development. “The number-one thing we do is help people get jobs,” says White. Heretic’s surplus earnings go back into the coffee shop, which functions as an on-the-floor training experience for people interested in barista work, he says. A manager, the only salaried employee besides White, oversees operations, while volunteers rotate shifts to gain barista experience to land paying gigs elsewhere.

It’s volunteer baristas like Peitrok who help make Heretic magical. “The lack of the social pick-me-up that I always receive from baristas each morning would make the days feel a little less joyful,” says a 36-year-old regular nicknamed T, who has been visiting since free breakfast began.

He often sits on the patio—even on rainy Portland days—with a bacon breakfast burrito and a vanilla latte, watching the cafe move around him. What might seem like a transactional exchange, he says, instead feels grounded in gratitude.

A community for every story

Working in the same space week after week, volunteer barista Susan Retondo has watched the cafe develop its own rhythm—regulars greet each other, and conversations spark between strangers during a morning rush. “It’s a mix of people here for the breakfast program and paying customers,” says Retondo. “They overlap seamlessly.”

Scenes in the cafe shift by the hour. Dogs snooze under tables. Customers stay for hours—reading, completing job applications, doing Zoom interviews, just catching up. Some are unhoused; others live in nearby affordable housing or are stretching limited incomes. “There have been several times a guest has ordered the SNAP breakfast on the verge of tears,” says Retondo. “People carrying shame over needing help, or who are almost in disbelief that we’re offering what we are in the way that we are, stay with me.”

SNAP was reinstated in Oregon on Nov. 7, but Heretic’s free breakfast lives on. More than 12,000 donors have raised about $400,000, which White has partially redirected to mutual aid organizations, including Equitable Giving Circle, Black Futures Farm and the Feed’em Freedom Foundation. At its peak, Heretic served 100 to 150 free breakfasts per day. Numbers decreased with time, but to White, that was always the point.

“The win is actually feeding fewer people, because the people we were feeding were able to get jobs, and now they can feed themselves,” he says. “We’re just here to be a bridge.”

Why trust us

For more than 100 years, Reader’s Digest has been known for its heartwarming true stories and focus on community. In 2017, we launched the Nicest Places in America, an annual contest that honors kind, inspiring people making a difference in their hometowns. Readers send in nominations, and Reader’s Digest’s editorial team vets the entries and whittles them down with the help of a panel of judges. This year, the judges included Today’s Al Roker, Tuesdays with Morrie author Mitch Albom, author and podcast host Mónica Guzmán, StoryCorps CEO Sandra Clark, Today co-anchor Craig Melvin, and Molly Irani, the co-founder of Chai Pani Restaurant Group in Asheville, North Carolina, which was 2025’s Nicest Place in America. We are committed to producing high-quality content by writers with expertise and experience in their field in consultation with relevant, qualified experts. Read more about our team, our contributors and our editorial policies.

How a Chicago Bookstore Became a Symbol of Hope

This Amateur Circus Brings Joy to Its Community

Ohio Residents Bring Magic to Hurricane Survivors

The post When SNAP Ended, Portland’s Heretic Coffee Co. Stepped Up to Feed Its Neighbors appeared first on Reader's Digest.

“Parker is a fantastic human being,” says real estate agent and longtime resident Lacy Flanagan. “The majority of people here know him and love him for his efforts to clean up the town.” Meador started this work on an impulse one day last August while out walking with his daughter Gabrielle. He noticed a bit of trash lying around, so they filled a plastic bag with wrappers, cans and other debris.

It made him feel good, so he went out the next day and did the same thing, and soon it became a routine. Now, he logs about two hours every day, seven days a week. A year in, having dodged snakes, fire ants, traffic and wasps, he has collected around 900 bags of trash from all over—schools, parks, sports fields, streams, creeks. People honk and wave. Some stop to thank him. Some give him hugs.

“It’s never a job,” he says. “I enjoy it tremendously. It’s a great way to serve God and our community and be useful.” Feeling useful has been a lifelong struggle for Meador, who has several mental health disorders. “My life is incredibly difficult,” he says. “Just to stay alive is a daily effort. I have a very difficult time working in front of people, so I serve my family and community in other ways.”

Get Reader’s Digest’s Read Up newsletter for more of the Nicest Places in America, heartwarming stories, fun facts, humor, cleaning, travel and tech all week long. 

A legacy of change

Charleston is the perfect setting for Meador’s effort. Located just 30 minutes from the Oklahoma border, it’s literally a one-stoplight town, and its Main Street is dotted with mom-and-pop shops and a simple brick courthouse. “Even though we’re just a small town, we’re very open-minded,” says Beverly Dotson, who nominated Charleston.

The city might be tiny and obscure, but it has an impressive claim to fame. Its school district was the first in the post-Confederacy South to desegregate all 12 grades after Brown v. Board of Education was decided in 1954. That same year, three years before nine brave students faced down the National Guard just two hours away in Little Rock, Charleston quietly shuttered its small school for Black students and welcomed the 11 pupils to its main institution—without resistance, press or fanfare.

“The leaders at the time were extraordinary people who had a vision and the wisdom to make it happen,” says Missy Moore, the current school superintendent. “The descendants of the people who made that decision are still part of this community and still want the same thing. We want to do right by everyone.” It was 72 years ago that the people of Charleston pulled off that groundbreaking feat. This year, they managed to pull off another one.

The power of coming together

It began in late 2024, when the state of Arkansas abruptly announced that it had purchased 815 acres just outside Charleston to build a 3,000-bed prison. Most people in Charleston were furious: There aren’t even 3,000 people living in the city, and this plan would massively strain resources and change the city forever. Worse, nobody even bothered to consult them.

A grassroots coalition of farmers, blue-collar workers, digital nomads, educators and members of the Chickamauga Nation—called Gravel & Grit— sprang up. They quickly educated themselves about the details of the ­proposed project and learned that although the governor’s office had purchased the land, construction funding still depended on the legislature. Through intensive lobbying, they ­convinced lawmakers that the site’s shortcomings would cause enormous ­overruns: The soil was too rocky, the water table too low, the roads insufficient, the labor supply inadequate. The project was shelved in April. “It was really neat to see it all come together,” says Flanagan, who is also a clan mother with the Chickamauga Nation.

The tiny city had prevailed once again, a David against a mighty Goliath, all thanks to that pervasive community spirit that shows up even in small ways, like Meador’s. He’s spinning his trash-removal efforts into a movement he calls Charleston Positive, complete with yard signs, fliers, a Facebook page and T-shirts, to celebrate positive things going on in the city, raise awareness about mental health and encourage community service.

“We can have such a huge impact on others,” he says, “in negative or positive ways. It’s our choice.”

Why trust us

For more than 100 years, Reader’s Digest has been known for its heartwarming true stories and focus on community. In 2017, we launched the Nicest Places in America, an annual contest that honors kind, inspiring people making a difference in their hometowns. Readers send in nominations, and Reader’s Digest’s editorial team vets the entries and whittles them down with the help of a panel of judges. This year, the judges included Today co-anchor Craig Melvin, Tuesdays with Morrie author Mitch Albom, author and podcast host Mónica Guzmán, StoryCorps CEO Sandra Clark, and Molly Irani, the co-founder of Chai Pani Restaurant Group in Asheville, North Carolina, which was 2025’s Nicest Place in America. We are committed to producing high-quality content by writers with expertise and experience in their field in consultation with relevant, qualified experts. Read more about our team, our contributors and our editorial policies.

Asheville, North Carolina: 2025's Nicest Place

The Mining Town with a Heart of Gold

A Free Bike Shed Keeps One Community Mobile

The post In Charleston, Arkansas, a Strong Sense of Community Inspires Residents to Speak Up and Make a Difference appeared first on Reader's Digest.

“I expected maybe $4,000,” he says. But the actual amount Kircher received was much more than he guessed: $6,000. “This community really comes together,” he says. “They’re trying to make sure that everyone has a chance. We’re kind of spoiled, honestly. In a bigger place, they wouldn’t be able to do it for everybody.”

For graduates of Swanville High School, there’s never any suspense about who’ll get a scholarship: If you apply, you’ll get one. And in this tiny town deep in Minnesota farm country, where the class of 2026 numbered just 22 students, almost every senior applies.

Get Reader’s Digest’s Read Up newsletter for more of the Nicest Places in America, heartwarming stories, fun facts, humor, cleaning, travel and tech all week long.

The small town with a big heart

Known as Dollars for Scholars, what started as a modest effort to help local students has evolved into a deep-rooted institution that now gives away about $100,000 in scholarships a year. Recipients can use the money for almost anything: college, trade school or continuing life skills for special education students. The program is backed by a year-round fundraising effort that includes bingo games, poinsettia sales, and weekly “meat raffles,” where locals buy chances to fill their freezers.

“Spin the wheel, and if it lands on your number, you win some meat,” says Dollars for Scholars president Teresa Giese, who nominated Swanville. “It’s a social thing. People love it. When my friends and I lose, we say, ‘It’s for the kids.’ ”

So how small is Swanville? The 2020 census counted just 326 people. Founded in 1883 as a timber town, Swanville today is a farming community best known for soybeans and the production of turkeys.

Drive through and you’ll see a cluster of homes, small businesses, grain elevators and steel storage sheds. You’ll see a bar called Lucky’s Saloon and a restaurant called Patriots Cafe that serves breakfast and lunch. You’ll see a school, a church and a little dirt road that leads to a little town dock on a little lake. Then you’ll be back in the soybean fields, on your way to the next little town.

“People say, ‘Oh, I’m from a small town; we know everybody’s name.’ I say, ‘We’re so small, we know everybody’s middle name,’ ” says Chris Kircher, Brody’s father, who chairs Swanville’s school board and owns a sporting goods store. But “small” doesn’t mean struggling. Last year, Dollars for Scholars surpassed $1 million in money awarded. Nobody imagined that kind of sustained success when a few locals launched the program in 1987, hoping to keep enrollment up and prevent the school from losing students to larger neighboring school districts.

“I was one of the first people to get a scholarship. I got it in 1991. I got $103,” says Chris. “I went to the bank, and they gave me a $100 bill and three ones.” These days, most students get at least a few thousand, and this year’s top recipient got $7,000.

Launching the next generation of dreamers

The financial base is an interest-generating endowment established years ago with a $100,000 donation from the local Lions Club and buttressed by annual fundraising. The program allows local donors to create personalized scholarships, often in memory of friends and family. Those contributions are matched by the main fund, so $250 from a donor becomes $500 for a student.

“People here aren’t rich. We don’t have a lot of money. But when we need it, we find it,” says the elder Kircher.

“There were times when we were concerned that we were going to lose our school. Now we’re adding classrooms,” says Stephenie Och, whose mother helped found Dollars for Scholars.

Her son Ethan Och graduated in 2016 and won $3,000 in scholarships. That helped him stay on track in his critical first year at the University of Minnesota, providing ready cash for pesky expenses like dorm fees and books. It wasn’t the first time that Swanville stepped up for him. Spinal muscular atrophy, a rare genetic condition, had put him in a wheelchair when he was a toddler. The Lions Club helped make his home wheelchair accessible. After he started school, the community passed a referendum to upgrade the building, adding ramps and other modifications.

“They needed to modernize—it was such an old building,” says Ethan. “So they saw my situation as an opportunity, not just for me but for other students too.” Ethan got a degree in aerospace engineering and mechanics, and today is a software engineer working for one of the nation’s leading defense contractors: “My dream job,” he says. He’s also funding scholarships of his own, including one that went to Brody Kircher.

And as for Brody, he’s off at the University of Minnesota’s Morris campus, playing wide receiver. He can easily see himself coming back to Swanville someday, he says, and would recommend the town to anyone. “I liked not being a stranger to anybody,” he says. “It’s easy to get to know people. They have faith in you. They have faith in everyone.”

Why trust us

For more than 100 years, Reader’s Digest has been known for its heartwarming true stories and focus on community. In 2017, we launched the Nicest Places in America, an annual contest that honors kind, inspiring people making a difference in their hometowns. Readers send in nominations, and Reader’s Digest’s editorial team vets the entries and whittles them down with the help of a panel of judges. This year, the judges included Today co-anchor Craig Melvin, Tuesdays with Morrie author Mitch Albom, author and podcast host Mónica Guzmán, StoryCorps CEO Sandra Clark, and Molly Irani, the co-founder of Chai Pani Restaurant Group in Asheville, North Carolina, which was 2025’s Nicest Place in America. We are committed to producing high-quality content by writers with expertise and experience in their field in consultation with relevant, qualified experts. Read more about our team, our contributors and our editorial policies.

How a Chicago Bookstore Became a Symbol of Hope

This Amateur Circus Brings Joy to Its Community

A Free Bike Shed Keeps One Community Mobile

The post Swanville, Minnesota, Made a Promise to Give Scholarships to Every Student—And Transformed Generations of Kids appeared first on Reader's Digest.

To get the best out of a crawfish, you need to work for it: You have to twist and pull to separate the tail from the head, push the meat from the tail with your thumb, then go back and suck the flavor from the head. But getting the best out of Liverpool, New York, isn’t nearly the same squeeze.

The village, only a square mile in size and 2,600 strong in population, fits right in neighboring Syracuse’s pocket. Despite its small scale, both charity and volunteerism pour from Liverpool at a disproportionate rate, making it a lily pad and vital leaping-off point for the entire region. The westerly side of town is almost entirely modest homes on shady, tree-lined streets; the easterly side is Onondaga Lake Park and small businesses with punny names (e.g., a yarn store called Knitty Gritty, a hair salon called Dead Ends).

The neon filament that lights the sky at Heid’s of Liverpool, a legendary hot dog restaurant that draws crowds from miles around, serves as Liverpool’s informal welcome sign. American High, an indie film studio, moved into the old A.V. Zogg Middle School in 2017, borrowing the classrooms and Liverpool’s all-American good looks for the teen movies it produces.

“Many of the suburbs of Syracuse are just that—a sprawl of homes,” says Rick Pelotte, project manager for Operation Northern Comfort, an area nonprofit born in Liverpool. “But Liverpool has a stronger identity.” One of the biggest parties of the year for the village is an annual crawfish festival, when Liverpool’s Operation Northern Comfort borrows Syracuse’s bustling Clinton Square to host more than 6,000 attendees from all over central New York.

But that idyllic small-town vibe is only part of what makes Liverpool an amazing place. It also has a rich history of service that stretches back more than two decades, and its residents show up for one another in tangible, heartwarming ways. Read on to find out what makes this tiny town tick and why it earned the title of Reader’s Digest’s Nicest Place in America for 2026.

Get Reader’s Digest’s Read Up newsletter for more of the Nicest Places in America, heartwarming stories, fun facts, humor, cleaning, travel and tech all week long. 

Inside Operation Northern Comfort

It wasn’t always called Operation Northern Comfort. When it was founded in 2005 by the late Norm “Mr. Liverpool” Andrzejewski, it was Operation Southern Comfort, an organization that sent central New Yorkers to Louisiana by the busload to help rebuild after Hurricane Katrina. Cisco Gonzales Jr. was 11 when Operation Southern Comfort helped rebuild his church in Louisiana and raise a family member’s house after the storm. He remembers the volunteers bringing supplies, extra hands, meals, and even donated tubas, trumpets and snare drums for local school bands. But more importantly, “they just brought hope,” he says.

For six years, the organization made routine trips to Louisiana, equipping a class of thousands of volunteers with new building and construction knowledge. It rebranded in 2012 as Operation Northern Comfort, ready to put its volunteers’ new skills to work at home, but not without taking a bit of Louisiana with it in the crawfish festival. Today, Operation Northern Comfort primarily builds ramps and lifts that give area residents with accessibility challenges the freedom to leave the house. (“People think there’s a government agency or something that you can call, but there isn’t,” says Laurel Flanagan, CEO of Operation Northern Comfort.) But if you can dream it, they can build it: bookshelves, desks, even DJ tables.

The festival, always the first Saturday in May (crawfish are no good any later), took place this year in unseasonably brisk weather, but the steam kept volunteer crawfish cooks warm as they stood over the boil. Blistering red mudbugs swirled around the pot with onions, garlic and lemon, plus a healthy serving of celery to soak up some of the Cajun spice that dyes the broth orange. Youth volunteers washed baskets of live crawfish—shrieking if one clung to their shirt—to replenish the stock.

More volunteers appeared with sport fishing nets slung over their shoulders to scoop cooked mudbugs from the boil and deliver them to a preparation station. Boxes of crawfish packed with corn and potatoes disappeared from the pickup table, toted around by merry attendees as they danced to live music and snapped photos with the crawfish mascot.

“I didn’t know it was a fundraiser for, like, a year,” says Flanagan, a festival attendee turned volunteer before she became CEO. Gonzales, now 32, flies up for the festival every year, often staying in the homes of old pals in Liverpool and showing attendees how to peel crawfish. “I always laugh, because if you ask my dad, he says, ‘You go there every year just to drink and have fun,’ ” says Gonzales, “and I’m like, ‘Yeah, that’s exactly what I do.’ ”

Every cent of the $40,000 raised by this year’s event will be poured directly back into the town and its neighbors. Festival revenue is the source of nearly all the money that Operation Northern Comfort raises each year, powering the 57 projects it completed in 2025. But Operation Northern Comfort is just one piston in Liverpool’s charitable engine.

“I nominated Liverpool because there are so many things that end up in our news of individuals who spend their time, their effort, to help other people,” says Liverpool resident Susan Edmonds, who herself volunteers at both the Humane Society and the airport military courtesy room. “If you think an individual doesn’t make a difference, boy that’s wrong.”

An individual difference

Ralph Rotella moved to Liverpool from Syracuse 31 years ago, after having arrived in the country in 1970. The village offers a bit of space between him and the city, and more room for a garden. Around the back of his house, you’ll find the tomatoes, cucumbers and zucchinis he tends with any free time he can eke out. On the doorstep, there’s a good chance you’ll find a garbage bag full of shoes.

Rotella is a cobbler, a trade that the Italian immigrant inherited from his uncle, along with his shop, Discount Shoe Repair in downtown Syracuse. Every year, the Liverpool resident gives away thousands of refurbished shoes to the Syracuse Rescue Mission so they can find the feet of someone who needs them.

Donations come in all forms (boots, sneakers, dress shoes, loafers), sometimes by the bag, sometimes a pair at a time. Occasionally, someone will buy and donate a new pair of shoes just to support the cobbler’s cause and save him the work of fixing heels, replacing laces or restoring soles. “The first year, I was so excited—we got 35 pairs. After the third year, a few hundred pairs. Now, every day, you see how many we got,” Rotella says, gesturing at the shoe-filled trash bags in his shop’s entryway. “That pile is only a week old. We almost got 500 pairs.”

Every day, at least a few people drop by the shop to add to the mountain of shoes—and some drop them off at Rotella’s doorstep in Liverpool. The Rescue Mission makes a pickup every three weeks so Discount Shoe Repair won’t get totally overrun. “I could never do it by myself,” says Rotella of the thousands of donors who make it possible. “Thanks to you guys and thanks to me, we do a good deed.”

Last December, when the Rescue Mission backed its truck up to Discount Shoe Repair’s doors for the final pickup of the year, the shoe drive made a new one-year record of more than 45,000 pairs. It’s always a celebration, complete with roasting chestnuts and jaunty Italian music, but this was a special milestone—300,000 pairs collected since Rotella started the drive in 2011.

“I reached my goal, but I’m still going to do it no matter what,” he says. “As long as my hands work and I can walk and dance, we’ll do it. I’ve been in Liverpool since 1995, and anyplace I go, in the grocery store or Home Depot, they say, ‘Ralph, I got some shoes for you. Can I bring them down?’ ”

“If the doors are open, you are welcome here”

The Rev. Bruce Gowe hasn’t lived in Liver­pool for nearly as long as Rotella, but it didn’t take long for the village to reveal itself to him. He moved to Liverpool about two years ago, when he started his ministry at St. Matthew’s Episcopal Church, a simple redbrick building on Liverpool’s outskirts near the highway that borders the village on the opposite side from Onondaga Lake.

Lots of the offerings in the region appeal to Gowe: hiking the Finger Lakes, the boisterous festival seasons, a community that cares for nature. He’s among the younger priests that staff the area’s 22 churches of varying denominations, and the first openly gay one at St. Matthew’s. The congregation, and Liverpool, embraced him with ease, an openness that he sees extending well beyond himself.

“There’s a sense of community and safety; you can thrive here,” says Gowe. “There’s that sense of being a large city, but there’s also the small-town America feel too.” Last August, Gowe noticed a woman using one of the church’s outdoor outlets to charge her phone in the parking lot. He’d seen her once before, pushing a shopping cart a bit up the road, and realized she must be homeless and had likely set up camp in the woods behind St. Matthew’s. Gowe didn’t mind—he said hello and told her that any time the church doors are open, she’s welcome to come inside.

“The Scripture says you never know when you’re hosting angels,” he says.

In time, a few members of the congregation built a rapport with the woman, until she eventually felt comfortable resting in the shade of the entryway and coming inside for a cup of coffee. St. Matthew’s supports local food pantries and also runs its own, and a care team began regularly preparing a special basket to help her get through the week. There’s a shower in the church building—they asked if she would like to come in and use it? One churchgoer offered to take the occasional load of laundry home for her, until another found a donated washer and dryer to install at the church. By fall, she was donning a Halloween mask for the trunk-or-treat event.

Gowe decided to contact In My Father’s Kitchen, a nonprofit in Syracuse offering direct street outreach to people experiencing homelessness, after hearing about it from another parish. Upon meeting the woman, co-founder John Tumino realized he’d met her before and had been trying to get her into housing for months before she disappeared to Liverpool. Today, she’s in an apartment in ­Syracuse thanks to Tumino—and the relationships she built in Liverpool. “Being part of the community ­allowed her to make those steps forward of ‘Maybe I do need help, and maybe there are folks who are safe enough for me to take that step,’ ” says Gowe. “I don’t think this would happen at other places—certainly at other places in Liverpool, but not necessarily other places in the country.”

What makes a village

“In a time where everyone is looking straight ahead and just taking care of themselves, it’s nice to know that if I get in trouble, I can knock next door and there’s someone there that’ll open the door and smile,” says Liverpool resident Simone McCarthy. “And that’s what Liverpool is.” Or, as 31-year-old Kenyan immigrant Raiss Muya puts it, “What makes Liverpool, Liverpool, is the people.”

Muya is the “someone next door” McCarthy was referring to—he has been her neighbor since he was 17. His kids call her Grandma, just as he used to, and spend hot summer days swimming in her above-ground pool. His parents have since gone back to Kenya and his siblings have moved out of state, but he took over the family home, unable to imagine life away from the village that welcomed him.

“Once we got here, everyone around just helped us out. We told ourselves, ‘This is the place to be,’ ” recalls Muya. “They had their hands open for us.”

So when a blizzard demolished the fence between his and McCarthy’s properties a few winters back, leaving her recessed driveway exposed to snow that would drift in and be impossible to clear, she barely had to ask before Muya opened his own hand.

He dug up the old fence, which was buried beneath mounds of snow and ice, and tethered the panels to the posts with wire as a temporary fix until spring. A few months later, McCar­thy’s landlord ponied up for the supplies, and Muya, a handyman, built a 6-foot cedar fence to block the following years’ snowfall. He worked in the evenings, after long days of fixing up other people’s homes, with the help of his young daughters, who did more wrestling with the shovel than digging post holes but held the level and fetched water for him.

“She helped us with everything. There’s no reason why I should say no or even think about it, you know?” says Muya. McCarthy often stops over with cookies and extra meals for the Muyas when she cooks too much. (“The best place to store food is in your neighbor’s stomach,” she’ll tell you.) To this day, she brings home groceries, dry goods and halal chicken, from the CNY Blessing Box, a food pantry in Syracuse where she volunteers. Not because they asked, but because, she says, “It’s the right thing to do.”

“If you have new neighbors in your town, go see what they’re about,” says Muya. “They’ll surprise you—because Simone definitely surprised us.”

“You don’t have to go out and save the world,” says McCarthy. “Just save your block.”

Block by block

Stacy Finney, Liverpool’s mayor and a public school art teacher, doesn’t think most people in town realize how special the place is. She remembers a friend passing through on his way to Chicago, and the way he marveled at their kids and other townsfolk, blissful and carefree at Onondaga Lake Park.

“He was like, ‘Look at them thinking this is totally normal.’ And it was true, you know, they do,” she says. “They genuinely think that this is normal.”

They were biking that day along Onondaga Lake, on whose shores the Mohawk, Oneida, Onondaga, Cayuga and Seneca people once brokered peace, making it a sacred space to be respected. Decades of industrial dumping at the turn of the 20th century rendered Onondaga one of the most polluted lakes in the country, but tremendous effort has made it fishable again, and birders flock to photograph the eagle’s nest near the Skä•noñh Great Law of Peace Center.

“I do think there’s a spirit of volunteerism in Liverpool,” Finney continues. “Because people love the area they live in, they want to enhance it. You’ve got to love where you live, and invest your time where you live.”

Why trust us

For more than 100 years, Reader’s Digest has been known for its heartwarming true stories and focus on community. In 2017, we launched the Nicest Places in America, an annual contest that honors kind, inspiring people making a difference in their hometowns. Readers send in nominations, and Reader’s Digest’s editorial team vets the entries and whittles them down with the help of a panel of judges. This year, the judges included Today co-anchor Craig Melvin, Tuesdays with Morrie author Mitch Albom, author and podcast host Mónica Guzmán, StoryCorps CEO Sandra Clark, and Molly Irani, the co-founder of Chai Pani Restaurant Group in Asheville, North Carolina, which was 2025’s Nicest Place in America. We are committed to producing high-quality content by writers with expertise and experience in their field in consultation with relevant, qualified experts. Read more about our team, our contributors and our editorial policies.

Asheville, North Carolina: 2025's Nicest Place

Provo, Utah, Combated a Youth Suicide Epidemic

Buffalo, New York, United During Deadly Blizzards

The post A Tiny Village in New York Spread Charity Far and Wide—And Became 2026’s Nicest Place in America appeared first on Reader's Digest.

We’ve interviewed some of the biggest names in entertainment—including Academy Award nominee and Emmy winner Angela Bassett, two-time Oscar winner Robert De Niro, and actress, model and bestselling author Brooke Shields—and asked them to share the advice they’d give their younger selves. And these are people who know a thing or two about dreaming big, taking risks, navigating setbacks and becoming seriously good at what they do. Their answers are honest, surprising and, above all, incredibly relatable. Think of it as a little hard-earned wisdom from people who’ve been there and now wish they could whisper it into their younger selves’ ears. Lucky for us, they’re sharing it with all of us instead.

Read on for the life advice these accomplished stars wish they’d known sooner. You just might find the words you need to hear.

Get Reader’s Digest’s Read Up newsletter for more celebrity interviews, quotes, fun facts, humor, cleaning, travel and tech all week long.

Eric Stonestreet

“I would say that it’s not that big of a deal. Most things that we get hung up on really turn out to be not that big of a deal. And you’ll know when they are [a big deal] as you move through life.”

Angela Bassett

“I give it to myself every day, because life is so hectic. I also give it to my kids, and they finish the phrase. I say, ‘You can’t dance.’ They say, ‘To every record.'”

Sheryl Lee Ralph

“Girl, be patient. Have patience. Trust me, it is all going to work out for you. The only people you really need to listen to and pay attention to are your parents, and use your sense of discernment. You will know those good mentors when they come along. But be patient, you little impatient person.”

Robert De Niro

“I have a lot of advice to give to my younger self. I remember I met a guy when I was a kid, maybe in my teens, and he was a salesman at a store and he said, ‘If I only knew then what I know now.’ So I have a lot to tell my younger self. Also, that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t do certain things, but be aware of the consequences. You have to learn through those experiences.”

Brooke Shields

“Like yourself more. Be kinder to yourself. And you don’t always have to say yes.”

Lance Bass

“Don’t care what people think of you. Live life for yourself and not for anyone else.”

Candice King

“Stop listening to the noise. Annie Lamott has this wonderful [concept], and she calls it Radio KFKD. It’s all the static and noise that can kind of cloud your brain. She talks about turning that noise down, so I would try to instill the concept of turning Radio KFKD down in my younger self’s brain.”

Neil Giraldo

“Don’t let people live inside your head that don’t belong there.”

Pat Benatar

 “Keep doing what you have to do.”

Michelle Monaghan

“Wear sunscreen!”

Alison Sweeney

“Don’t worry so much. It’s all going to work out. You work hard, and people see that. So maybe don’t be so insecure about it. It’s happening.”

Ted Danson

“I can’t wait for you to see what’s happening next for you. I’d say relax and enjoy.”

Adrienne Bailon-Houghton

“I would say, learn that ‘no’ is your friend and not your enemy. I think it took me a really long time, and I’m still in my 40s learning how to get comfortable with saying no. When I was younger, I was OK with feeling uncomfortable just to make other people feel comfortable, and that wasn’t fair to me. Learning how to say no has been a gift.”

Meghan Trainor

“You’re doing great.”

Russell Wilson

“Keep going.”

Aja King

“I would tell her, ‘You are so smart and so beautiful just as you are. You don’t have to pretend to be anything else for anyone. You are enough.'”

Debra Messing

“Don’t listen to anyone. Just follow your instincts.”

Lisa Ann Walter

“Forget about the 10 pounds—just be the way you’re supposed to be. You’re going to ruin your metabolism and be miserable for your whole life. Forget it. And it’s someday in the near future that big butt that you have, that Sicilian Koolie, is going to be so popular that girls are going to try to buy it. So stop hating your butt.”

Jordin Sparks

“I would probably tell her that she’s doing great and that life is going to be so insane, more than you ever dreamed of, and to not sweat the small stuff.”

Barry Levinson

“Just deal with whatever seems like the thing I should do. Growing up, I never had an ambition, certainly not to direct or write or any of that. It wasn’t even in my conscious mind whatsoever. I just sort of followed things that interested me, but not knowing where that was going to go. I had no goals set. I was just [thinking], What am I attracted to? And I just went down that road.”

Why trust us

At Reader’s Digest, we’re committed to producing high-quality content by writers with expertise and experience in their field in consultation with relevant, qualified experts. We rely on reputable primary sources, including government and professional organizations and academic institutions as well as our writers’ personal experiences where appropriate. We verify all facts and data, back them with credible sourcing and revisit them over time to ensure they remain accurate and up to date. Read more about our team, our contributors and our editorial policies.

Josh Groban Talks Leveling Up and What's Next

Authors Share Their Favorite Comfort Reads

Olympian Napheesa Collier on the WNBA

The post We Asked 20 Celebrities What Life Advice They Would Have Given to Their Younger Selves—And You’re Going to Want to Pay Attention appeared first on Reader's Digest.

And you likely have a similar story.

But making friends as an adult is a whole different thing. I’ve been a fitness teacher for more than a decade, which has given me a front-row seat to watching adult friendships form. For example, there were two women in my early morning hot Pilates class who showed up every Monday and Wednesday for months to sweat, shake and silently swear at me. They usually placed their mats next to each other. They could ID the other person’s water bottle in a lineup. They noticed when the other got a new pedicure. Heck, they spent months inches away from each other wearing less clothing than professional gymnasts, and yet they’d never said much beyond “good morning.”

One day, I introduced them, telling them they had a lot in common. There was an awkward silence before one said, “So I see you also like suffering in a dark room with strangers before dawn,” and from that point on, I got to watch a beautiful friendship develop. Now they grab smoothies together, chat about their kids and even know each other’s last names. 

It’s a process I’ve watched dozens of times: going from head nods to words to whole sentences to, eventually, whole friendships, with birthday texts, carpools, the whole shebang. This can take months or even years—but it doesn’t have to. In fact, there’s an elementary school tactic to making friends as an adult that forges those relationships on a truncated timeline. I spoke to three friendship experts about this surprisingly simple, slightly embarrassing, extremely effective technique that you actually mastered by the time you were 7 and just kind of forgot.

Read on to find out what it is so you can make new connections more easily and expand your social circle in all sorts of wonderful ways.

Get Reader’s Digest’s Read Up newsletter for more life hacks, etiquette, humor, cleaning, travel, tech and fun facts all week long.

Why is making friends as an adult so much harder?

Before we get into the nitty-gritty of making friends, we need to address this head-scratching part of social interactions and how they change as we get older. “Adults make friendship much harder than it needs to be,” says Kyler Shumway, PsyD, a licensed psychologist who is also the author of The Friendship Formula and the host of Science of Friendship. “We sit around waiting for friendship in a world that lacks structure for adult connection, we age and diversify, and see less and less in common. And then, when we do have opportunities for friendship, we keep our cards close to the chest because we’re afraid of getting burned.”

The stakes here are bigger than just having someone to sit with at lunch in the office. “We have a basic psychological and biological need to be connected to other people,” says Alan Rozanski, MD, a professor of medicine at the Icahn School of Medicine at Mount Sinai who studies social connectivity. He points to research from a landmark 1979 study of nearly 7,000 adults, which found that people with the fewest social ties were significantly more likely to die within the study period than those with the strongest ones, regardless of how healthy they were to begin with. “And every study since has confirmed it.”

What is the elementary school tactic that can help you make friends as an adult?

You ready for this? Sit at the same table. For kids, it’s the actual lunch table. For adults, it doesn’t have to be that literal, although it can be. Let’s call in the Lunch Table Effect. Here’s how it works: Choose one place (a running club, a mom group, a gym, a trivia night, a theater group, a pickleball league), show up consistently, notice the others who are also there, and be open. Eventually, those people become familiar and then friendly and then, with the help of some vulnerability, real friends. 

“Kids become friends with whoever they keep ending up next to, and it’s not that different for adults,” Shumway says. He explains that friendship needs the three E’s: engagement, experience and emotional bonding. Those translate, respectively, to opportunities to meet people, time invested together and some real connection. Sitting at the same table checks off the first two almost automatically.

Science backs this up: A foundational study of relationships done by the University of Kansas found that it takes about 50 hours together for adults to go from strangers to casual friends, 90 hours to become real friends and at least 200 hours to be truly close friends. And guess what—90 hours is basically an elementary school’s semester worth of recess, and 200 is just over a school year.

That said, it’s not just about time. The researchers found that time spent with people in required settings, like a work meeting or a mandatory class, does very little for sparking friendships. You can share a cubicle wall with someone for years and still think of them as “Bob whose middle name is ‘from accounting.’” The hours that truly count are the ones that you actively choose. This is the part that’s built in for children through school recesses, parks and play dates. As an adult, you have to create your own version of lunch and recess. 

Tayler Meade, a mental health coach and the author of A Note to the One Left Walking in the Grass, adds an important related habit kids have that adults tend to lose: They leave a seat open. “We can start choosing to leave seats open, metaphorically and physically,” she says, “instead of saving them for people we think we’re supposed to connect with.”

But sitting at the same table is just the first step. At some point, someone is going to have to say something, and this requires a measure of vulnerability that many adults are not comfortable with. “Kids are naturally more willing to be vulnerable, to put themselves out there,” Dr. Rozanski says. “It can feel scary or too risky to adults, but offering a little vulnerability is how we build reciprocal relationships.” Vulnerability is how you get to the third “E”: emotional bonding. 

You don’t have to say anything profound; you just have to say something. Shumway is a good example of how this works. He shares that in grad school, he’d been hitting it off with a classmate named Dan over lunch, until the conversation ran dry and things got awkwardly quiet. So he decided to just say the thing out loud: “Dan, I’m going to try to be real vulnerable with you. I’m not really sure how to make a friend. I don’t have any, really, and I’m not sure if I know how. But I like you, you’re a cool dude, and I want to try to be friends with you.” Dan grinned. “I was just starting to think you didn’t like me,” he said. Dan is now Shumway’s best friend, weekly workout buddy and co-speaker on friendship and neurodiversity.

Why does the Lunch Table Effect work so well?

The Lunch Table Effect works because it solves two of the trickiest parts of making adult friends—proximity and time—while keeping things relatively low stakes. Really, all you need to do is keep showing up. 

Nostalgia is a big part of the appeal. Sitting at the same table (or being on the same team or in the same exercise class) reminds adults of the fun things they used to do when they were kids, when life felt simpler. By the time you’re an adult, you’re juggling so many responsibilities that the thought of adding one extra thing—even if that is a new friend—can feel overwhelming. So you need to take it back to the primary school level, Dr. Rozanski says. 

How do you do that? By being deliberate. This intentionality is super important because you prioritize things that you actively choose. “Things that are important but not urgent, like friends, are the easiest things to bump to next week, so you have to be intentional about it,” he explains. “You need to intentionally find your ‘lunch table.’” 

And lastly, it’s low pressure by design. You’re not asking anyone to be your best friend and drive you to the airport at 2 a.m. You’re just asking them to play pickleball next week. Then the repetition locks in the path to friendship.

What happens in our brains when we do this?

Every time you show up somewhere familiar, your brain takes familiar people from the “stranger, therefore possibly unsafe” category and reclassifies them as “probably safe,” which settles down your whole nervous system. It’s called the mere-exposure effect, the well-documented phenomenon that the more familiar things (and people) become, the more we like them. So every game night or yoga class where you see the same faces is another reinforcement to your brain that these people are OK.

Shared positive experiences also light up our neural pathways in ways that other things don’t. Dr. Rozanski points out that laughing or doing something enjoyable together triggers the feel-good brain chemistry that bonds people. And it’s one reason why “misery loves company” activities (a killer workout, a chaotic trivia round, truly bad karaoke) tend to bond people even faster. Dr. Rozanski references psychologist Daniel Goleman’s book Social Intelligence, which details the neuroscience of connection, including mirror neurons—brain cells that fire both when we act and when we watch someone else act, part of how we come to feel empathy for others. And oxytocin, sometimes nicknamed the “bonding hormone,” is released during positive social connections and seems to be part of what causes people to trust each other. 

But the real magic isn’t the hormones, he says. It’s in the repetition and consistency, which trains our brains and calms our nervous system.

What will give this a higher probability of success?

Our experts have a few simple tips to make the Lunch Table Effect work faster and more effectively:

• Put cheese on the broccoli. “Social interaction can feel a lot like broccoli,” Shumway says. “We know it’s healthy and good for us, but it’s not always appealing.” His fix: Pick a “table” you’d enjoy sitting at, even if you never made a single friend there. Like moving? Try a climbing gym or hiking group. Like reading? Join a book club. Can’t find a group that fits? Start one. Shumway runs a recurring D&D game wherever he lives because he genuinely loves it, friends or no friends. 
• Skip the small talk (once you’ve earned the right to). Once you’ve become acquaintances, skip past the “some weather we’re having” for a line with more substance, like: “What’s something you’re really excited about this week?” People consistently underestimate how much they’ll enjoy a deeper conversation even with someone they barely know, and they tend to feel happier and more connected than if they stuck to small talk. 
• Say hi to everyone, not just your favorite person. Meade is big on this one. The more you look around for others to include, the more potential friends you will find, even if they’re not the ones you’d usually think of first. Even brief interactions make you feel happier, and practicing on low-stakes strangers makes the real invitations feel easier.
• Move away from the table eventually. The table is great for establishing a relationship, but true friendships evolve past one single activity. Remember, hours spent purely inside one closed system don’t build closeness on their own—the relationship needs proof it can survive outside its original habitat.
• Schedule it. Yes, on your actual calendar. Because friendship falls into that “important but not urgent” quadrant, Dr. Rozanski suggests deciding in advance how often you’ll show up—weekly, twice a month, whatever—instead of leaving it to whenever you happen to feel like it.
• Give it at least three tries. Too many adults go to one dance class, don’t make a friend, then give up and go home. Or they’ll have a small rough patch and decide the other person isn’t worth it. But kids don’t give up after the first try, and “they can disagree during playtime and hug at the end of the day,” Meade says. Adults tend to treat one awkward interaction as a final verdict. Shumway’s rule of thumb: Try connecting three times before reading it as a genuine no.

What mistakes should you avoid?

The biggest risks here aren’t rejection or looking silly—they’re the little mistakes that torpedo the friendship before it can really get going.

• Don’t assume proximity is enough. If your only shared “table” is a required one, then pick a chosen activity on top of it—lunch away from your desk, happy hour, anything you’re both there for by choice.
• Don’t be glued to your phone. Dr. Rozanski describes how people used to talk to their neighbors on the bus, and now, everyone is on their phones. But every scroll is a small, missed opportunity for a connection. And this includes taking out your earbuds if you’re used to wearing them everywhere.
• Don’t resort to gossip. A common friendship mistake is to “bond” over talking about others. “Those are empty calories,” Dr. Rozanski says, referring to quick, easy chatter about other people, as opposed to “the stuff that fills us up,” which comes from actually giving something of yourself. Not only that, but gossip can backfire by making you look less trustworthy.
• Don’t mask. Kids haven’t yet learned to mask out of fear of shame or rejection, so they’ll tell a total stranger they like their shirt, or that their dog just died, within minutes of meeting them. Shumway says adults tend to do the opposite, presenting a safe, buttoned-up version instead. Closeness comes from being willing to be seen, not from being impressive.

Where might you have the most luck with this technique?

The optimal places for the Lunch Table Effect are anywhere that you’d see the same people consistently. Good bets include:

• A recurring class you’d enjoy anyway—dance, spin, pottery, improv, a language course
• An athletic group, like a running club, rec league or regular pickup game
• Trivia night, or a bar that hosts the same event weekly
• Volunteering for a cause you genuinely care about
• A book club, hobby group or recurring tabletop game
• A place of worship or community group you attend regularly
• The dog park at roughly the same time each day

Worse bets are the places designed for exactly one interaction and then never again: a wedding you’re not hosting, a one-off networking mixer, a concert (too loud to actually talk), or a party where you know exactly one other person who promptly disappears. None of those gives the Lunch Table Effect anything to work with, because there’s no “again” built in. The magic sauce isn’t the table itself. It’s the repeat visit.

So the next time you’re sweating next to the same stranger for the third month in a row, skip the compliment about their water bottle and instead try what Shumway did with Dan and just say the thing: “Hey, I feel like we should actually know each other’s names by now.” Worst case, it’s a little embarrassing for three seconds. Best case, you’ve just picked your table.

Why trust us

At Reader’s Digest, we’re committed to producing high-quality content by writers with expertise and experience in their field in consultation with relevant, qualified experts. We rely on reputable primary sources, including government and professional organizations and academic institutions as well as our writers’ personal experiences where appropriate. For this piece on the Lunch Table Effect, Charlotte Hilton Andersen tapped her experience as a longtime journalist who frequently writes about communication, psychology, etiquette and common curiosities for Reader’s Digest. We verify all facts and data, back them with credible sourcing and revisit them over time to ensure they remain accurate and up to date. Read more about our team, our contributors and our editorial policies.

Sources:

• Kyler Shumway, PsyD, licensed psychologist and CEO of Deep Eddy Psychotherapy; personal interview, Sept. 15, 2026
• Alan Rozanski, MD, professor of medicine at the Icahn School of Medicine at Mount Sinai; personal interview, Sept. 16, 2026
• Tayler Meade, board-certified mental health and brain health coach and author; personal interview, Sept. 16, 2026
• Journal of Social and Personal Relationships: “How Many Hours Does It Take to Make a Friend?” 
• American Journal of Epidemiology: “Social Networks, Host Resistance, and Mortality: A Nine-Year Follow-up Study of Alameda County Residents”
• Roots of Loneliness Project: “Loneliness Statistics”

We've Been BFFs for Years but Never Actually Met

How to Be Friends with Your Siblings as Adults

Friendship Stories That'll Make You Call Your Bestie

The post This Elementary School Tactic Is a Surefire Way to Make Friends as an Adult (Yes, Really!) appeared first on Reader's Digest.

Why? Well, just when you thought your inbox couldn’t get any more stuffed with stuff you don’t want to read, a major email carrier recently launched new fundraising rules for political groups. And you can be certain they will take advantage of them. How much can possibly fit into our already-at-capacity inboxes? Just you wait. Things are about to get way worse—but there is something you can do about it. Read on for the details.

Get Reader’s Digest’s Read Up newsletter for more news, tech, humor, travel and fun facts all week long.

Why are we about to get an avalanche of political fundraising emails?

Google recently launched a new Gmail Verified Sender Program, which will allow “eligible, verified political committees” to send “policy-compliant and non-abusive messages” straight to your email inbox, bypassing the spam filter.

The program is open to candidates, political parties, political action committees (PACs) and similar groups registered with the Federal Election Commission (FEC) or other election authorities. To qualify, political senders must be verified, send emails from a public domain and keep spam below 0.3% of the total number of email they send. If users mark more than 0.3% as spam when the emails come in, senders can get suspended for seven days or booted from the program.

The policy went into effect on Sept. 8, so the new reality is well underway.

Why did Google think this was a good idea?

One reason Google may have decided to allow increased political fundraising is to reduce the number of lawsuits it’s had to respond to. The Republican National Committee (RNC) sued Google in 2022 for “throttling” its email messaging campaigns with its spam filters. The case was dismissed, but the RNC appealed. In January 2026, the RNC lost again.

Also in 2022, the RNC and the Republican Senate and Congressional campaign committees filed a joint complaint with the FEC over Google’s spam filters, which they accused of intentionally censoring their messages. The FEC dismissed the complaint. Other lawsuits and complaints over the years have met similar fates.

But back to the original question. Given the lack of a big announcement by the company, it’s not clear that Google does think it’s a good idea, at least in terms of pleasing Gmail recipients. Google quietly updated its Help Center website to reflect the policy change, underscoring the idea that it anticipates users will not be happy with the increased email traffic.

And this isn’t the first time Google tried this. Back in 2022, the company launched a pilot program that also prevented political emails from being filtered as spam. Comments to the FEC were uniformly negative, according to a review of hundreds of them by Axios.

Aside from an overflowing inbox, are there any other potential dangers?

The main one has less to do with the volume of spam and more with the senders themselves. Being verified under this program doesn’t tell you anything about the fundraisers’ business practices or where your money will go.

“I did a lot of work in Congress to crack down on scam PACs that send you fundraising,” Katie Porter, a former Democratic congresswoman from California, told CNN when the policy became public. “They say they’re going to help elect veterans, but when you look at where the money goes, 99.99% of the money goes back into the pockets of political consultants. This doesn’t do anything to tackle that.”

Another risk is scammers trying to mimic a legitimate political group to solicit funds, harvest your data or hack your accounts. In 2021, the Department of Justice (DOJ) charged three people with fraudulently soliciting $3.5 million from unsuspecting givers. And just before the 2024 election, the FBI warned of phishing scams, merchandise “no-shipment” scams and other fraudulent activity masked as legitimate political correspondence.

Is there any way to stop the deluge of emails?

You can reduce them, but it’s unlikely you can stop them completely. Here are four options.

• Click unsubscribe. Google recommends that senders offer a one-click unsubscribe button, so use it. You can also open the message and navigate to the unsubscribe options at the company’s website.
• Create a filter. In the search bar at the top, click the “show search options” icon to show filters. Or click the box next to an unwanted email, then hit the three dots menu and select “filter messages like these.”
• Mark the email as spam. If a company does not unsubscribe you, mark the emails as spam. Know that this will not unsubscribe you, but it will send the emails automatically to your spam inbox.
• Block the sender. If you want nothing else from the sender at all, open the email, hit the three dots “more” menu and select “Block [sender].”

Sources:

• Google: “Gmail Verified Sender Program eligibility & policies”
• New York Times: “Google Just Made It Easier for Campaigns to Send You Fund-Raising Emails”
• Fox News: “Gmail change may flood your inbox with political email”
• Reuters: “US appeals court rejects RNC lawsuit claiming Google email spam filters harmed fundraising”
• CNN: “FEC dismisses RNC complaint that Google’s spam filters were biased against conservatives”
• CNN Transcripts: “The Story Is with Elex Michaelson, Aug. 19, 2026”
• U.S. Election Assistance Commission: “Alert – Misleading Voter Registration Phishing Email”
• DOJ: “Three Individuals Charged with $3.5 Million Scheme to Collect Contributions for Fraudulent Political Action Committees”
• Axios: “Leave campaign emails in spam, FEC commenters demand”

Readers Share Election Day Memories

The Funniest Presidential Campaign Slogans

What's Your Greatest Wish for America?

The post Brace Yourself! You’re About to Get a Lot More Political Fundraising Emails Before the Midterms—Here’s Why and What to Do About It appeared first on Reader's Digest.

He fact-checks with a heap of modesty: The Celine Dion moment was just part of a rehearsal for the 1999 Grammys. Famed tenor Andrea Bocelli—set to duet with the Canadian superstar on the broadcast—wasn’t able to make it to practice, so Foster called Groban to stand in. “And while I think, in hindsight, I held my own through the nerves to sing with Celine,” he says with a chuckle, “I was not ready for primetime.”

But Groban’s talent in that moment, says Rosie O’Donnell, who was hosting the Grammys that year and caught the performance, was undeniable. “Josh was [basically] not old enough to drive,” she tells Reader’s Digest. “And he did the rehearsal and I was in shock. I said, ‘Who is that kid? Opera boy. He sang like an opera star!’ And David [Foster] said, ‘Oh, he’s this young kid and he’s going to go big places,’ and I’m like, ‘Well, I gotta have him on my show!’”

Singing on The Rosie O’Donnell Show not long after felt like a fluke to Groban. “I wish I could tell you that was a star-making moment,” he says, “but it wasn’t. It was an amazing thing that Rosie did for me. That’s a piece of my history.” But after the appearance, “I went back to class. Nobody knew my name. I wasn’t signed. I didn’t have a producer, a record label, a publicist, an agent or a manager. I had my parents.”

Get Reader’s Digest’s Read Up newsletter for more celebrity interviews, fun facts, humor, cleaning, travel and tech all week long.

The beginnings

So who was that kid who had the chops to duet with Celine Dion at 17? The son of a visual arts teacher (his mom, Lindy) and an executive recruiter who happened to play a mean trumpet (his dad, Jack), Groban says he grew up “in the center of Hollywood, but not surrounded by show business.” That said, creativity was embraced and curiosity rewarded.

Groban’s home had Blood, Sweat & Tears, Gladys Knight, Elton John and Otis Redding playing on repeat, along with his dad’s jazz and classical albums. Groban was also taken to see the Los Angeles production of The Phantom of the Opera as a kid. “I thought it was the coolest show I’d ever seen in my life,” he says. “As an angsty tween, I connected with the antihero-ness of the Phantom. ‘He’s just misunderstood! Let him play his organ!’ I found myself defending him. But I’d sing the music because it was so heart-wrenching and beautiful.”

Phantom led to Sunday in the Park with George and other musicals. “I was totally hooked,” Groban says. “I was like, ‘This is a medium that I feel I’m right for. I want to sing. I want to act. I want to not dance—but I want to do the other two!’” And he did so with the full support of his family.

“They wanted to harness whatever wild energy they saw in me,” he says. “I had ADHD and didn’t know it. I was bouncing off the walls. I was distracted in class. I was sitting in the back a lot because I was lost inside myself. And I think my parents saw these artistic bursts of inspiration as an access point for expression and confidence.”

The biggest burst, he says, came from his first solo moment on stage in junior high: “I did what a lot of young singers do when they love it but are too shy to say they love it, which is: I joined the choir. I’d be in the back and just loved the blend.” But when his choral teacher Richard Berent asked the class if anyone knew what scat singing was, Groban—thanks to his dad’s jazz records—raised his hand. He was then chosen to scat a solo in the Gershwin jazz standard “’S Wonderful.”

Though he worried a live scat would equate to social suicide (“It was like … dead man walking,” he says), on the night of the performance, with about 70 people in the audience, everything clicked. “Hearing myself on a microphone with no choir behind me, expressing a song that I loved … that was a moment that I’ll never forget. It was like a halo of light. For a kid that was never focused, I felt like I was on this superhighway of focus.”

Even better? It made singing a safe identity to embrace. “In school, even the hardest-edged kids were like, ‘Yeah, bro, that was great,’” he says. He went from being “the shy kid that can’t make friends” to something different: a singer.

The (long-awaited) breakthrough

And that brings us back to the Grammys, The Rosie O’Donnell Show and then, about two years later, in May 2001, another mainstream moment you might remember: a role both acting and singing on Ally McBeal. From there, finally, the self-titled first album.

“I got to make an album in absolute peace and quiet,” Groban says. “Nobody knew I was on the horizon.” And when it debuted in November 2001, “It did not come out of the gate successful,” he says. Well … at first. His duet with Charlotte Church, singing “The Prayer” as part of the Salt Lake City Winter Olympics closing ceremony in February 2002, was seen by an estimated 1 billion people.

And six weeks later, as the momentum was building, 20/20 did a feature on the young star. “I went from 120 on the charts to, like, 20 the next day,” he says. The breakthrough was finally official. In a New York Times piece in July of that year minting him “The New Boy Wonder,” the then-21-year-old put his stake in the ground for his next big goal: Broadway. When asked about his dream part, he answered, “Any role in Sweeney Todd.”

The pivots

Fast-forward 10 years, and Groban had hit all the marks: Grammy nominations, platinum records, packed arena shows and a fan army of “Grobanites” flocking to every appearance (some shouting marriage proposals from the stands). The world was his oyster.

But Groban was still, he says, figuring himself out. (And remember that in his teens, the two things he loved to do were singing and acting.) The self-described film geek explored all kinds of on-camera roles, from popping up as Andy Bernard’s younger brother in two episodes of The Office to co-leading the Netflix comedy The Good Cop with Tony Danza in 2018.

He played jerks (see his still-discussed role as Emma Stone’s lame boyfriend Richard in Crazy, Stupid, Love). He sang tweets on Jimmy Kimmel Live! and played himself on It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Parks and Recreation, Glee, American Dad! and CSI: NY.

“I was advised for sure to not blow the brand,” he admits. “But it allowed me to show that there was a human being behind this persona. A lot of the press I got was so serious and so much like, ‘We’re putting this opera child on a pedestal.’ Comedy was my way to get back on my feet, back on the ground.”

And that turned out to be especially true for self-deprecating comedy. “It was a way for me to machete through my own demons, put a pie in my own face,” he says. “And also to be around some of the funniest, smartest people that I’ve ever met. The rhythm of a great song is the same as finding the rhythm that makes somebody laugh.”

The ultimate team-up of his talents finally led Groban to Broadway. He appeared there in 2016 for the first time in the musical Natasha, Pierre & The Great Comet of 1812. His leading role as depressed outcast Pierre earned him his first Tony Award nomination for Best Actor in a Musical.

Then, in a full-circle moment, 21 years after calling it his dream role in the New York Times, his second Broadway starring role was the titular role of Sweeney Todd in Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street, for which he got his second Tony nod.

“I’ll never forget our first night with an audience, and I was standing behind him watching him sing the first verse of “My Friend,” says his co-star Annaleigh Ashford. “The song is a serial killer singing to a razor blade, and I could feel the air in the room change. I could feel the audience lean in.”

The impact

Back in the early 2000s, as Groban’s star was rising, the media clasped onto a quote from a music industry exec who called him the first internet star. Groban’s youth made him a natural for the latest technologies, from live chats to Vine video shorts. And the clearest example of his technology-fueled community-building power is the influence of the Grobanites.

These diehards, estimated at over 20,000  strong, came together in the early days of the web to find community and, just as importantly, leverage their collective voice to lobby radio stations and TV programs to get their favorite singer on the air. But they also supported the nonprofit and community work that Groban has embraced over the years—like working with Project 46664, Nelson Mandela’s global campaign to raise awareness of HIV/AIDS in Africa.

Groban says his devoted fans took their encouragement to a new level in 2005. During a show that year, he recalls, he saw a group of Grobanites make a move toward the stage—and they had something with them. “It was one of those Publisher’s Clearinghouse–type checks,” he says. “I don’t even know where you get one of those!”

The fans told Groban they’d been raising the money for a long time and that it was a donation for whenever he wanted to start a foundation. “I see artists who are built up and torn down in the same year by fan bases,” he says. “And for me to have a group of people that connects with my music but also wants to be a part of the rest of it as well? That’s one of the most profound things that’s ever happened to me.”

Groban channeled the funding into what became the Find Your Light Foundation, an organization that supports arts education. “Arts education isn’t just a feel-good extracurricular,” he says. “It can be as lifesaving and life affirming for other kids as it was for me.” Since its inception, the foundation has donated over $7.5 million to 450 arts education organizations around the United States. Joining Groban on the foundation’s board are three people who understand the power of creativity in kids’ lives—his parents and his brother, Chris.

“An amazing part of this philanthropic journey is how deeply he involves his family,” says Find Your Light Foundation Executive Director Jeffrey Dollinger. “Philanthropy isn’t a vanity project for him—it’s rooted in a deep curiosity of how the arts can make the world a brighter and better place.”

The future

At 45, with a life consisting of a billion individual choices thus far, what does Groban see as the best decision he ever made? “Saying yes to making a Broadway debut was a big one,” he says. “Revisiting a dream that I’d had since I was a kid, knowing full well that it could go sideways and the critics and audiences could say ‘Go back to your home.’”

He pauses to think. “And proposing.”

We haven’t yet talked about the sweetest marriage proposal of 2026: In April, Groban got down on one knee in Disneyland to propose to his longtime girlfriend, actress Natalie McQueen. “That’s probably the best decision I’ve ever made in my life, asking that question,” he says. “It was also a decision for myself. I’ve carried this feeling of expectation. There’s always something next. You’re never slowing down; the train just keeps moving. And to get down on one knee and ask that question to me was like, Right, you also deserve this. It took a lot for me to finally give myself that permission.” He smiles.

McQueen is by his side now as he tours his latest album, Cinematic, an eclectic collection of movie classics, from Skyfall to As Time Goes By. In October, he’ll perform a five-show residency at The Colosseum at Caesars Palace in Las Vegas.

“I’m feeling more blessed now than I ever felt during that first red carpet when everybody was shouting [my] name,” he says. At this midlife mark, he says, he has a better perspective. He’s been through both the highs and the lows. (At this point of the interview, Groban jumps into the chorus of Joni Mitchell’s “Both Sides Now”—and, of course, it’s wonderful. The exact right choice for the closing credits of our conversation.)

“I relate to that song very much,” he says. “When I first sang some of these songs at 17, I hadn’t lived. I didn’t know what that stuff felt like. I didn’t know anything. So to have all of that rich nuance of life behind me now, to sing all the songs in my catalog now—it comes from a much deeper place.”

Why trust us

At Reader’s Digest, we’re committed to producing high-quality content by writers with expertise and experience in their field in consultation with relevant, qualified experts. We rely on reputable primary sources, including government and professional organizations and academic institutions as well as our writers’ personal experiences where appropriate. We verify all facts and data, back them with credible sourcing and revisit them over time to ensure they remain accurate and up to date. Read more about our team, our contributors and our editorial policies.

Exclusive: Actress Angela Bassett

Exclusive: Actor Eric Stonestreet

Exclusive: Actress Brooke Shields

The post EXCLUSIVE! Josh Groban Keeps Leveling Up—And His Next Chapter Might Be His Most Ambitious Yet appeared first on Reader's Digest.

2025 winner: Asheville, North Carolina

Asheville has the perfect blend of big-city creativity and small-town charm. Cultured, quirky and welcoming, this small city in the Blue Ridge Mountains—our 2025 Nicest Place in America winner—is especially appealing to travelers who like their sightseeing with a heaping side of interesting art, delicious food and plenty of local character.

The River Arts District, along the French Broad River, is the city’s creative quarter. Here, artists and craftspeople, from ironworkers and painters to potters and glassblowers, have studios and galleries in former industrial buildings. It’s an area made for spending a day getting lost, watching artists at work or joining a hands-on class to make art of your own.

The city is also home to many James Beard Award–winning restaurants, including Cúrate Bar de Tapas and Chai Pani. These restaurants serve more than just great food—they offer a window into the community spirit that makes Asheville so special. After Hurricane Helene devastated the region in September 2024, many local restaurants sprang into action—including Indian street-food restaurant Chai Pani, where a skeleton crew wrapped sandwiches to feed hundreds of neighbors.

That’s just one of the many stories that explain why exploring Asheville’s many breweries, independent shops and galleries—or even visiting the Biltmore, the impressive Vanderbilt estate just outside downtown—feels more special than a typical getaway.

Where to stay: Boutique property The Foundry Hotel occupies a restored former steel foundry, and it features exposed brick and other original industrial details throughout. Located in The Block, the city’s historically Black neighborhood, the hotel is also just steps from downtown shops, restaurants and attractions.

Book Now

2024 winner: Provo, Utah

I’ve passed through Provo, Utah, many times, and it’s the kind of place where you can spend a morning hiking through the surrounding Wasatch Mountains and be back in town for lunch. Its location makes it especially appealing for outdoor enthusiasts, since it has so many options for hikers, bikers, anglers, climbers and more, all close at hand.

Home to Brigham Young University and some 35,000 students, Provo has the unmistakable atmosphere and energy of a college town, but also a strong sense of community and a culture of volunteerism.

A trip to the high-altitude city might include a steep hike on the trails of Y Mountain. Once you reach the giant white Y, which was created by university students in the early 20th century, you’ll be rewarded with panoramic views of Provo and Utah Lake. For an easier outing, take a walk or bike ride along the paved parkway beside the Provo River, which winds into scenic Provo Canyon.

Autumn turns crisp and more than a little magical in this part of Utah. The season brings the forests along the Alpine Loop Scenic Byway to vivid life, and there are plenty of opportunities to stop for a brisk hike, cozy picnic or worthwhile visit to Timpanogos Cave National Monument. When the snow starts falling, Provo is also a convenient launching point for skiing and snowboarding at nearby Sundance Mountain Resort.

Where to stay: For a dose of history, book a room at the eight-suite Hines Mansion, a Victorian-era mansion in downtown Provo designed by Richard Kletting, the architect behind the Utah State Capitol. Filled with character and original period details, it’s within walking distance of many of downtown Provo’s most interesting shops and stops.

Book Now

2023 winner: Buffalo, New York

In Upstate New York, warmer weather makes Buffalo, a city of nearly 300,000 people on the shores of Lake Erie, a pretty compelling getaway. The friendly vibe in the City of Good Neighbors is on full display in the 350-acre Delaware Park on Hoyt Lake. Often called the city’s Central Park, the centerpiece of Frederick Law Olmsted’s pioneering park system comes alive in summer, from the Japanese Garden and Rose Garden to Shakespeare in Delaware Park, the annual free outdoor theater tradition.

Of course, the NFL’s Buffalo Bills are woven into the city’s personality. In the fall, football fans can experience the city’s passionate Bills culture at the brand-new Highmark Stadium in Orchard Park. Pride in the hometown team is palpable, from the tailgating parties to the sea of blue and red that fills the stadium on game days.

And now, fans can get an inside look at the sport at Science Stadium, a new permanent exhibition at the Buffalo Museum of Science. The interactive, hands-on experience explores football and the science behind it, and gives fans the chance to record their own highlight-reel sportscast from an anchor desk.

Where to stay: The Richardson Hotel, in a former 19th-century mental health treatment complex, is now a National Historic Landmark. Its grounds were designed by landscape architects Frederick Law Olmsted and Calvert Vaux, and the property still showcases their grand vision of architecture and green space on the Richardson Olmsted Campus.

Book Now

2022 winner: Coulterville, California

On a recent trip through Northern California, I drove along roads that wound past rolling fields, sprawling ranches and wide-open spaces before reaching tiny Coulterville, a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it town in Northern California. With just 118 residents, according to the latest official census, the former Gold Rush town is worth slowing down for. In a region where wildfires can rage out of control, threatening livelihoods, the people who call Coulterville home have learned they can rely on one another.

This rugged corner in the foothills of the Sierra Nevada gets far less attention than San Francisco, about 140 miles to the west, but Coulterville was once a thriving gold-mining mecca and a major stop on the way to another national treasure, Yosemite—which is the reason I stumbled upon the tiny town.

Today, it has a handful of preserved Gold Rush–era buildings lining Main Street, like the Sun Sun Wo Co., a former Chinese mercantile that was part of Coulterville’s Chinatown. Stop at the Northern Mariposa County History Center for a bit of on-site gold panning and to see Whistling Billy, an eight-ton Porter locomotive once used to haul ore from nearby mines.

Where to stay: For a unique taste of Coulterville, spend the night in a 1964 boxcar and caboose at Vacation Station, a decommissioned train converted into one-of-a-kind lodging. Larger groups might consider the Yosemite Paradise Inn, a bed-and-breakfast just outside of town.

Book Now

2021 winner: Kodak, Tennessee

The tiny town of Kodak, in Sevier County, has a big and very convenient advantage: Its central location puts several of East Tennessee’s most visited attractions within easy reach.

Pigeon Forge, the entertainment hub of the Smokies and home to Dolly Parton’s Dollywood, as well as numerous live dinner and music shows, is about 15 miles away. The area around the iconic theme park will no doubt be hosting many events and tributes to the late singer and beloved philanthropist, so stop by if you’re in the area.

Gatlinburg, a mountain resort town and gateway to Great Smoky Mountains National Park, is a similar distance from Kodak. And Knoxville, with its restaurants, museums and historic neighborhoods, is about 20 miles west. For nature lovers, the scenic drives and 800-plus miles of trails of the Smokies are roughly 25 miles south, making the country’s most-visited national park an easy day trip.

Where to stay: The Quality Inn Interstate in Kodak was named Reader’s Digest‘s Nicest Place in America in 2021, so why not stay there? The proprietor, Sean Patel, an immigrant from India, offered locals rooms at a fraction of the usual rate when a major winter storm on Christmas Eve 2020 left many in the area without power. The conveniently located property is a great base for exploring the surrounding sites, including Dollywood and the Smoky Mountains.

Book Now

2020 winner: Buchanan, Michigan

In southwest Michigan, the small city of Buchanan is about 90 minutes from Chicago—but a world away. In 2020, Reader’s Digest named the Midwestern city its Nicest Place in America, recognizing how residents here came together that year to fight racial injustice and overcome the coronavirus pandemic.

More than six years later, the town of just over 4,000 residents remains a genuinely appealing and easy escape, and there’s much more to do than its small size might suggest. Downtown, Front Street is lined with independent shops, cafes and restaurants. The Common, a community gathering place, hosts concerts, festivals, farmers markets and other events that bring residents together.

The town is also surrounded by nature. The roughly four-mile McCoy Creek Trail winds through woods and along the water, making it a pleasant way to explore the area by foot or bike. For a taste of the region’s wine and craft-beverage scene, head to Hickory Creek Winery or River Saint Joe, a farmstead brewery.

Where to stay: Set on 600 acres of riverfront countryside about 5 miles from downtown Buchanan, the Morris Estate offers suites, cabins and plenty of scenic views. The estate was a farm and retreat for the family of E.M. Morris, a local philanthropist and former Notre Dame student whose influence can be heavily felt in the area. A darling vintage chapel, delicious dining and luxurious accommodations await you.

Book Now

2019 winner: Columbiana, Ohio

Columbiana, in northeastern Ohio, is a festive place to visit at any time of year. But each September, the city comes alive to celebrate the Columbiana Street Fair, a longstanding tradition that allows neighbors to meet neighbors and raises money for the local American Legion. The entire town (and anyone stopping by) can enjoy rides, food, music and a parade.

Despite its name, Columbiana is closer to Cleveland than Columbus—and even closer to Canton, home of the NFL’s Football Hall of Fame. Football fans can take in a Browns game or head to the Hall of Fame and then stay overnight at one of the area’s charming bed-and-breakfasts. Or you can head to Youngstown, just a half-hour away, to learn about the region’s rich steel-mill history.

Estate-sale buffs and other vintage hunters can browse Antiques in the Woods, an event held each fall just outside of town in the Shaker Woods. When cold weather arrives, locals gather for the Joy of Christmas Holiday Light Festival, complete with cookies and hot cocoa. Come spring and summer, the outdoors beckon with the Columbiana Wine Festival at Firestone Farms in June and a 4th of July fireworks display.

Where to stay: About a half-hour drive from Columbiana, Chapel Valley Estate is a renovated farmhouse turned warm and welcoming bed-and-breakfast set on 9 acres in the peaceful countryside outside of Pittsburgh. Completely redone in 2003, the estate features natural stone walls that were unearthed during the renovations, adding an old-world charm to any visit.

Book Now

2018 winner: Yassin’s Falafel House, Knoxville, Tennessee

There are many reasons to visit Knoxville, but start with a meal at Yassin’s Falafel House, named Reader’s Digest’s Nicest Place in America in 2018. The restaurant’s owner and operator, Yassin Terou, a Syrian refugee, has carved out a niche in the city’s food scene and made the restaurant a safe place and true community for everyone who walks through the door.

Then, head downtown and check out the observation deck at the Sunsphere, the hard-to-miss gold disco ball built for the World’s Fair when Knoxville hosted it in 1982. Right next door, you’ll find one of the world’s most unique gifts: a giant 10-foot-tall, 1,200-pound Rubik’s Cube, given to the city by Hungary, where the puzzle was born.

For something equally rare but a lot more cute and cuddly, check out Zoo Knoxville, which holds the distinction of being the birthplace of more red pandas than any other zoo in the world. In fact, the feat has earned Knoxville the nickname “The Red Panda Capital of the World.”

Where to stay: The 28-room Oliver Hotel occupies a restored 19th-century bakery right on Knoxville’s Market Square. The hotel provides bikes for guests to explore the historic city, but it’s a worthy destination itself for those who prefer to stay in and visit the on-site literary-themed speakeasy, Peter Kern Library.

Book Now

2017 winner: Gallatin, Tennessee

Once a farming community along the Cumberland River, Gallatin has grown into a thriving city in the Nashville metropolitan area. Just 23 miles northeast of the Tennessee capital, it’s growing rapidly while holding onto the small-town character that earned it the distinction of Reader’s Digest’s very first Nicest Places in America title in 2017.

The historic downtown is a good place to get to know Gallatin, starting with stops in its many locally owned shops and restaurants clustered around the courthouse square. Pay a visit to the elegant 1842 Greek Revival mansion Rose Mont, then stop at the Sumner County Museum to learn more about the people and events that shaped the region.

The great outdoors are an important part of life here too. Spend a day boating and fishing on Old Hickory Lake, or trade the water for the hiking trails of Bledsoe Creek State Park.

Where to stay: A night at the four-bedroom, four-bathroom Historic Stonewall is one of Gallatin’s most unique and storied stays. The nearly 200-year-old property has lived many lives, from a doctor’s home and boys’ dormitory to a private family residence. Today, it’s a historic property managed by the Sumner County Museum, which books it for overnight stays.

Book Now

Why trust us

Reader’s Digest has published hundreds of travel stories that help readers explore the world safely, easily and affordably. We regularly cover topics such as the best places to visit (and the best times to visit them), tips and tricks to zoom through airport security, flight-attendant secrets, hotel-room hacks and more. We’re committed to producing high-quality content by writers with expertise and experience in their field in consultation with relevant, qualified experts. We rely on reputable primary sources, including government and professional organizations and academic institutions as well as our writers’ personal experiences where appropriate. We verify all facts and data, back them with credible sourcing, and revisit them over time to ensure they remain accurate and up to date. Read more about our team, our contributors and our editorial policies.

The post Time to Plan Your Nicest Vacation Yet! Here’s Your Guide to All of <i>Reader’s Digest</i>’s Nicest Places in America Winners appeared first on Reader's Digest.

Now, Quan is taking us somewhere even more personal: inside his own remarkable story with Never Say Die, his first book, released this month. The memoir traces his journey from a child in a refugee camp to a beloved actor on the Oscars stage, but Quan tells Reader’s Digest that its real heart lies in the decades when Hollywood stopped calling. “Those were the hardest chapters to write because they’re super personal,” he says of the roughly 30 “quiet years” when many people thought he had simply disappeared.

For this episode of The Reader’s Digest Escalator Interview, we caught up with Quan to dive deeper into Never Say Die—and, in true Escalator Interview fashion, we couldn’t resist getting a little nosy along the way. He opened up about what it was like revisiting some of the most difficult chapters of his life, revealed his writing snack of choice and answered the big question he knows you’re wondering about. “[Fans] always want to know what it’s like making Indiana Jones and The Goonies, and what it was like working with Harrison Ford,” Quan says. “If you’re fans of those two movies, you’ll love those chapters.” And when it came time to assemble his dream dinner party? Let’s just say fellow Goonie and longtime friend Jeff Cohen definitely has a seat at the table.

Read on for our exclusive interview with Ke Huy Quan, and shop his recommended reads below!

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Reader’s Digest (@readersdigest)

Join the free Reader’s Digest Book Club for great reads, monthly discussions, author Q&As and a community of book lovers.

Why trust us

At Reader’s Digest, we’ve been sharing our favorite books for over 100 years. We’ve worked with bestselling authors including Susan Orlean, Janet Evanovich and Alex Haley, whose Pulitzer Prize–winning Roots grew out of a project funded by and originally published in the magazine. Through Fiction Favorites (formerly Select Editions and Condensed Books), Reader’s Digest has been publishing anthologies of abridged novels for decades. We’ve worked with some of the biggest names in fiction, including James Patterson, Ruth Ware, Kristin Hannah and more. The Reader’s Digest Book Club, helmed by Books Editor Tracey Neithercott, introduces readers to even more of today’s best fiction by upcoming, bestselling and award-winning authors. For this piece, Leigh Belz Ray interviewed author Ke Huy Quan. We verify all facts and data, back them with credible sourcing and revisit them over time to ensure they remain accurate and up to date. Read more about our team, our contributors and our editorial policies.

The RD Escalator Interview with Ayad Akhtar

The RD Escalator Interview with Tia Williams

The RD Escalator Interview with Marlon James

The post Watch <i>The Reader’s Digest Escalator Interview</i> with Actor and Author Ke Huy Quan appeared first on Reader's Digest.

But community also lives “in the small, repeated contacts of daily life—the neighbor who waves every morning, the co-worker who checks in when you seem off, the person at the coffee shop who remembers your order,” says Lucy Rose, the founder of The Cost of Loneliness Project, who is on a mission to combat loneliness and build human connection. The way she sees it, community “is the web of relationships where people feel seen and know they matter.”

Since 2017, we’ve conducted an annual search for the Nicest Places in America, highlighting amazing hometowns (and even a few individual businesses) that celebrate the idea of community as not just a place to live and work, but somewhere you really feel part of the broader whole. We’ve had some incredible winners over the last 10 years, and to commemorate this milestone anniversary, we thought we’d help you make your community the very best it can be.

We talked to Rose, as well as Spud Marshall, founder of My Creative Community and the author of Designing Creative Communities, to learn tangible tips for making your hometown an even nicer place to live. We also checked in with Laura Malcolm, founder of Give InKind, to find out the best ways to respond in a crisis. Here’s how to strengthen your own community and create a place you can truly call home.

Get Reader’s Digest’s Read Up newsletter for more community building, cleaning, humor, travel, tech and fun facts all week long.

What qualifies as a “nice” place?

“The answer changes from person to person—a new parent, a retiree and a 22-year-old need very different things from the same town,” Marshall says. But we can start with a few basics.

“Safety, services and green space matter, and they create the conditions where connection can grow,” Rose says. “So do the places where people naturally gather: accessible sports leagues, arts events, the local restaurant that turns into an unofficial neighborhood hangout.”

But the idea of a nice place to live goes beyond things to do. “What ties all of those together is whether people walk away feeling like they belong,” Rose says. “What I hear again and again in my work is that people remember how a place made them feel more than what it offered them.”

Often, that comes down to finding human connection. Marshall says what sets a nice place apart is the “density of weak ties—the number of people you may recognize but don’t (yet) know well.” It’s these casual acquaintances that connect you to the broader whole. “The social-capital research backs this up, and honestly, you can feel it just walking down a street.”

Marshall even has a test: “How many places in your town can you go alone and reliably run into someone you know? That number tells you more than any ‘best places to live’ ranking.”

How active is the process of creating a great place to live?

It’s as active as you want it to be. Nice places to live don’t just spring up out of nowhere, so the more you put in, the more you get out. But being active doesn’t have to mean joining a club or signing up for a long-term commitment.

“Real impact often comes without any formal structure at all,” Rose says. “Checking on an elderly neighbor after a storm counts. So does inviting a new co-worker to lunch, or holding the door and actually asking someone how their day is going, then waiting for the real answer.”

Of course, if you want to get involved more formally, that’s great too. But don’t overlook the active participation of just being there for someone. “Those gestures matter more to the person on the receiving end than most of us realize, and they add up when people make a habit of noticing instead of waiting for a program to organize it for them,” Rose says.

How can you strengthen your own community?

“Start with proximity,” Rose says. Look at what you’re already doing and go from there.

“Here’s what most people miss: You already belong to more communities than you realize,” Marshall says. “The dog park at 7 a.m., the same grocery checkout line, the parents at daycare pickup.” It’s easier than you think. “The work isn’t finding community,” Marshall explains. “It’s noticing the communities you’re already in and adding one ounce of intention into them.”

Here are some expert-approved, tangible ways you can strengthen your community right now. If one doesn’t speak to you, try the next one. “The best option is the one that fits naturally into the life you’re already living,” Rose says.

Introduce yourself

This one might be daunting, but it’s worth it. “Introduce yourself to a neighbor you haven’t met,” Rose says. You don’t have to go knock on their door or anything—just take a lap around the block a few nights a week. When you pass someone doing yard work or sitting on their porch, instead of looking at your phone or keeping your earbuds in, look up and say hi, along with your name. Most people will respond in kind.

“Warm, attentive neighbors can make a town with modest amenities feel like home,” Rose says.

Go to a local event

No matter what size town you live in, there’s probably a local gathering going on sometime in the near future. It could be a library book fair, a church potluck or a local band playing down at the corner bar. Look on community message boards for events that sound fun to you.

You don’t have to know anyone there, Rose says: “Show up to a local event, even if you’re going alone.” If that makes you nervous, remember that everyone else is there for the same reason: to enjoy a nice evening under the stars, find a book to read or support the same charity. If you meet someone, great. If you go home feeling that you’re not alone in this world, even better.

Host an informal gathering

“Host the low-bar thing, not the big thing,” Marshall says. “My wife and I host potluck brainstorms at our house with the simple goal of inviting strangers together to dream up new ways of making a difference in their town.” If you’re not sure how to get strangers on board, start with people you know and ask them to bring a friend.

Who knows? Your small event could turn into something more. “The fun part is that [our] informal gathering turned into a series of formal groups over the years,” Marshall says. “And many of those groups have gone on to create significant impacts in our community.”

Change up something you already do

The simple act of putting your current group into new situations can foster community. “I also run kayak meetings and frisbee golf meetings instead of coffee, because doing something side by side is what lets people talk about the real stuff,” Marshall says. “It feels more real and memorable but doesn’t require joining a formal group of any sort.”

Volunteer

Is there an issue that’s close to your heart? “Volunteer somewhere that puts you face-to-face with people,” Rose says. This could be walking dogs at the animal shelter, sorting donated food or clothing at your church or a local shelter, or signing up to drive your neighbors to vote. Having a task keeps you busy, so you’ll feel less pressure to make small talk (though you’ll be surprised how easily conversations will come), and you’ll foster community while you’re at it.

Think small

Marshall says building community is all about making small moves. You don’t have to spend every Saturday at the soup kitchen to make a difference. “Learn and actually use the names of five neighbors,” Marshall says. Once you know them, you can be the conduit for other connections. “Be the person who introduces two other people—a connector builds community without ever running anything.”

Say “yes”

“Another important starting point is to say yes to the invitation you’d normally decline,” Marshall says. Do you always say “no” when your friend asks you to go hiking or play pickleball? Next time, change up your answer. “You’d be surprised where that ‘yes’ may lead you.”

What should you do when your community is facing a crisis?

It might seem strange to think about building community during a crisis, but it’s in these tough times that people come together. “Crisis tends to strip away the usual social distance between people, and that’s actually an opening,” Rose says. “When needs are acute, your direct presence and attention can matter as much as any supplies you bring.”

Here’s what you can do to help your community in a crisis.

Offer to be the point person

If the immediate crisis has spared you, offer to either check in with a point person or be that point of contact for your community, Malcolm says. If you can, organize a meal train, offer to set up a donation page, rally neighbors for support, or give your neighbor a call and just ask: “Hey, neighbor, this crisis is happening. Can I be the point of contact?”

Malcolm’s organization, Give InKind, hosts donation pages for people going through tough times. “You can take on setting up a page and find out exactly what’s needed, and people can come on and give support in those different ways that can be helpful,” she says.

Check in on vulnerable neighbors

When natural disasters and other emergencies happen, we tend to look inward because the immediate needs are so acute. But don’t forget your neighbors, whether that’s the elderly man who just lost his wife or a person with special needs who might be frightened by the commotion.

“Check on people who live alone,” Rose says. “That’s a really big one,” Malcolm agrees. Also remember that crises take many forms, not just tornadoes and hurricanes. “We have seniors who check themselves out of the hospital AMA [against medical advice] because there’s no one there to walk their dog.”

When things start getting back to normal, “stay in contact after the initial crisis passes, because that’s often when the isolation sets in hardest, once everyone else’s attention has moved on,” Rose says.

Adjust your help to the need

Helping your neighbors will take different forms depending on the crisis. “If their house burned down, it might be gift cards for Airbnb or Home Depot,” Malcolm says. “If they have a child in the hospital, it might be that they need meals dropped off every night at a certain time for when they get home.”

Be specific about what you will do

Instead of asking generally what people need, Malcolm says it’s better to offer specific help. “Look for a thing that you know you can do, and offer to do it,” she says. “Say, ‘I’ll be responsible for wheeling your bins to the curb every week for the next six weeks unless you let me know otherwise.'”

Or if you’re organizing a meal train for someone, you might say, “We’re putting a cooler on your step, and we’ll let people know that if they’re dropping off meals, they should put them in the cooler between 5 and 6,” Malcolm says. “Let us know whether you want visitors.”

What’s the one thing you can do every day to make your hometown a “nicest place”?

For you and me, it might be hard to single out one thing to do every day. But Rose and Marshall had answers immediately, and they were surprisingly aligned.

“Be the one who says hello first,” Marshall says. “It sounds too small to matter, but it’s the whole ballgame–every relationship in your town starts with one person deciding not to look at their phone.” Or take it one step further: “Give away one specific useful thing a day: an introduction, a recommendation, a ride, 10 minutes of what you know.”

As for Rose? “Notice someone. Make eye contact, ask a real question, and listen to the answer,” she says. “It doesn’t take much time, but it’s also rare. Most people move through their day surrounded by others and still feel unseen. A single moment of genuine attention can interrupt that for someone, and it costs nothing.”

Why trust us

At Reader’s Digest, we’re committed to producing high-quality content by writers with expertise and experience in their field in consultation with relevant, qualified experts. We rely on reputable primary sources, including government and professional organizations and academic institutions as well as our writers’ personal experiences where appropriate. We verify all facts and data, back them with credible sourcing and revisit them over time to ensure they remain accurate and up to date. Read more about our team, our contributors and our editorial policies.

Sources:

• Lucy Rose, founder of The Cost of Loneliness Project; email interview, Sept. 16, 2026
• Spud Marshall, founder of My Creative Community and author of Designing Creative Communities; email interview, Sept. 16, 2026
• Laura Malcolm, founder of Give InKind; phone interview, Sept. 17, 2026
• Stanford Report: “50 years on, Mark Granovetter’s ‘The Strength of Weak Ties’ is stronger than ever”

How to Be Happier and Feel More Connected

Find Belonging Through Chosen Family

Build Empathy and Form Deeper Connections

The post 11 Ways to Turn Your Community into One of the Nicest Places in America appeared first on Reader's Digest.

I probably should have seen it coming. It was the first week of school, and back-to-school might as well be called back-to-flu. And sure enough, two days later, my throat also felt like I swallowed razor blades, doused them in gasoline and set them on fire. (She may have been dramatic, but she wasn’t wrong.) I did, however, manage to refrain from coughing in anyone’s face. 

What should we do? 

Cold and flu season creates an etiquette dilemma because getting sick isn’t a social offense or a moral failing. It’s just human. And sometimes you don’t know you’re sick until you’re already standing in someone else’s kitchen. Or you attribute feeling a little fatigued or sniffly to just being, well, a little fatigued. It literally could be nothing. That being said, there’s a big a difference between coming down with the sniffles mid-event and knowingly showing up to a four-hour indoor party while hacking up a lung like consumption is in vogue again.

So what is the polite thing to do if you feel like you’re coming down with something or you’re flat-out sick? Is it really rude to not tell someone you’re sick before you meet up? Grab a box of tissues, and let’s discuss. 

Get Reader’s Digest’s Read Up newsletter for more etiquette, humor, cleaning, travel, tech and fun facts all week long.

The case for telling them you’re sick

Telling people you’re sick is simply about giving them the information they need to make the decision that’s best for them. Your infectious status is important info for regular healthy people, but it’s even more important for people who really need to avoid getting sick, like people who are pregnant, very old, very young or immunocompromised. Not telling them could have terrible consequences. It is also very pertinent info for people who may be preparing for an important event like a wedding, vacation or surgery. And you likely don’t know all of those circumstances because people don’t usually preemptively announce what they can’t get sick for. 

There’s a practical reason to share as well: You probably look sick. If you show up with two pockets stuffed full of tissues and a voice like Al Pacino, they’re going to know something is up. Realizing that you knew you were sick and didn’t say anything may feel like a frustration, at best, and a betrayal, at worst. 

Of course, we do need to mention the friend who’s a germophobe (and you privately think is being a little ridiculous). There’s a definite temptation not to tell them because they’ll turn it into A Big Thing, but I’d say that’s even more of a reason to let them know. Anxiety often stems from a lack of information. You being matter-of-fact and honest can help allay their fears. Or they’ll cancel, but that’s their decision to make.

The important distinction here is that telling someone you’re sick isn’t the same as asking for permission. You can say, “Hey, I woke up with a head cold, and I just wanted to let you know before we met up. Totally get it if you’d rather reschedule.” Boom, done. Now they have the information, and they can decide what they feel good about doing.

The case for not telling them

There are also good reasons for not turning every sneeze into an emergency alert. Sometimes, extra information just causes extra stress, especially for people already prone to worrying about getting sick. Colds are endemic. Telling someone you have a little cold during cold season isn’t particularly surprising or unique. After all, nearly everyone is sniffling then, and they’ll be sniffling and sneezing all around you when you’re out.

Not to mention that people don’t always know when they’re contagious. You can wake up feeling completely normal, go through your day and realize at night that you have a sore throat. Maybe your sniffly nose is just allergies. Or you have a lingering cough from a cold three weeks ago that’s no longer contagious. And we’ve all had those days when we feel more tired than usual and wonder if it’s the onset of an illness or just too many churros while binge-watching The Pitt. (That last one might just be me.) At any rate, expecting someone to diagnose themselves correctly before every social occasion is a pretty high bar.

And do others really need that info about you? Privacy is a swiftly dwindling resource these days, and we should hold on to the few shreds we have left, even if those shreds are in our sinuses. Plus, for people who tend to disclose too much, feeling like you need to report all your symptoms can be a terrible type of oversharing—especially if it involves anything below the waist. People don’t want or need the play-by-play of your bathroom adventures. 

The gray areas

Of course, the best etiquette advice about whether or not to tell someone you’re sick before you meet up is … it depends. On what?

• The location. Are you going to an outdoor baseball game where all those germs will get diluted in the stadium, not to mention be in a place with a whole bunch of other people harboring their own viruses? Or are you going to someone’s house, where you’ll breathe the same air for three hours?
• The event. Is this a family gathering where great-grandparents and babies will be? Or are you playing frisbee in the park with friends?
• The illness. A mild head cold is a far cry from the flu, COVID or something that requires both a garbage can and a toilet. One is a small annoyance, and the others can take people out for days—and are super contagious.
• The sick person. The dynamics change when it’s a child who is sick. Kids get sick far more often than adults, and they are not particularly hygienic or cooperative about not sneezing in other people’s eyeballs. As a parent of a sick child, you need to be open about their contagiousness too.
• Steps you are willing to take. Are you willing to mask up? Bring extra hand sanitizer? Be flexible about the location and activity? Taking responsibility for what you can control and doing your best to ameliorate that risk goes a long way in relationships.

One gray area that isn’t so gray: the idea that you already committed, so you have to go, no matter what. People sometimes feel that canceling is worse than showing up sick because “I said I’d be there.” But most hosts would rather avoid germ exposure or at least be given a heads-up about it.

So what should you actually say?

Just keep it simple. They don’t need to send a medical dissertation. Something like: “Just a heads-up that I woke up with a cold today. I’m feeling OK, but I wanted you to know before we got together. Totally understand if you’d rather reschedule.”

Or if you’re not sure whether you’re actually sick: “I have a scratchy throat today, and I’m not sure if I’m coming down with something. I feel fine otherwise, but I wanted to give you a heads-up.”

Or if you know you’re genuinely sick: “Hey, friend. I’m definitely sick, so I think we should reschedule. I’m sorry. I was really looking forward to seeing you.”

Notice that all three messages avoid pressuring the other person. You’re also not saying that it’s not a big deal and the other person shouldn’t worry about it. Give them the information, and let them decide.

What if you’re the one who shows up and discovers someone is sick?

Time to make your own personal-risk calculation. Of course, that will look different for each person. If you’re uncomfortable for any reason, it’s perfectly fine to ask to change plans—like moving things outside—or excuse yourself. No need to make a dramatic announcement or accuse them of being irresponsible.

“I’m actually trying really hard not to get sick right now. Would you mind if we reschedule?” is great.

So what happened with our trip?

Canceling the trip didn’t feel like an option—the visit was too important. Neither my daughter nor I had a particularly serious illness (we tested negative for both COVID and the flu), and no one involved was elderly or immunocompromised. But my husband and I agreed that we needed to tell our family before we showed up. They weren’t thrilled, but they still wanted us to come. So we wore masks on the airplane and in common areas, stayed in a hotel instead of their house and changed several of our activities to be outdoors.

And you know what? The trip turned out great. Everyone had a wonderful time, in large part because nobody was surprised when we showed up sick.

The verdict

Yes, it’s rude not to tell someone you’re sick before you meet up … if your illness could reasonably change whether someone wants to see you. Not every circumstance will require a disclosure, but as a general rule of thumb, this is information that’s polite to share. If they opt to reschedule, don’t take it personally. But if they want to see you anyway, do your best to minimize germ exposure. And if you know you’re sick sick—or you’re going to be around people who are especially vulnerable—consider canceling or changing the plans rather than putting others in the uncomfortable position of deciding for you.

The etiquette isn’t about whether you got sick; it’s about giving people enough information to decide whether they want to spend the afternoon with you and whatever microscopic hitchhikers you’ve brought along.

As for my daughter’s razor-blades-on-fire throat? We both recovered, our family survived the trip, and nobody else got sick. Which proves that sometimes a little honesty, a few precautions and a healthy respect for other people’s lungs can go a long way. Although I still maintain that “my throat feels like I swallowed razor blades and lit them on fire” was an unnecessarily elaborate way to ask for a popsicle.

Why trust us

Reader’s Digest has published hundreds of etiquette stories that help readers navigate communication in a changing world. We regularly cover topics such as the best messages to send for any occasion, polite habits that aren’t as polite as they seem, email and texting etiquette, business etiquette, tipping etiquette, travel etiquette and more. We’re committed to producing high-quality content by writers with expertise and experience in their field in consultation with relevant, qualified experts. We rely on reputable primary sources, including government and professional organizations and academic institutions as well as our writers’ personal experiences where appropriate. We verify all facts and data, back them with credible sourcing and revisit them over time to ensure they remain accurate and up to date. Read more about our team, our contributors and our editorial policies.

Is It Really Rude Not to Invite All Your Friends?

Is It Really Rude to Pull an Irish Exit?

Is It Rude to Take Your Assigned Appetizer Home?

The post Is It Really Rude to Not Tell Someone You’re Sick Before You Meet Up? appeared first on Reader's Digest.

Well, there’s a new Barbie in town, and it’s unlike anything you’ve ever seen. Scratch that—it is like someone you’ve seen before, and the likeness is uncanny. People are going absolutely nuts for it too, and when I say “people,” I mostly mean women of a certain age, like me.

Ahead, I’ll tell you everything you need to know about this buzzy new Barbie doll that will have you singing Mattel’s praises and jumping for joy if you manage to snag one. Read on to discover why this Barbie is so cool and where you can get your hands on one.

Get Reader’s Digest’s Read Up newsletter for more toys, nostalgia, humor, travel, tech and fun facts all week long.

What is the new Barbie generating all this buzz?

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Barbie (@barbie)

Get out the smelling salts, ladies, because the latest Barbie doll is Lenny Kravitz. The ultra hip and incredibly lifelike “Kenbassador” celebrates the multi-hyphenate singer and pop-culture icon—and looks great doing it, right down to his sexy stubble and tight blue jeans.

According to Mattel, the “wildly cool doll replica of this artist honors his boundary-breaking spirit and captures a signature look from his ‘Blue Electric Light’ tour in amazing detail, including tattoos, a nose ring and authentic locs.”

They didn’t mention the abs, but he’s got those too.

The Lenny Kravitz doll is part of Mattel’s Barbie Signature Kenbassadors Collection, which honors influential men who are making a difference in sports, music and culture. The Kenbassador line was launched last year to celebrate the still-spry Ken on his 65th birthday.

Why are people losing their minds over this doll?

Did I mention the abs? This doll is gorgeous, just like Kravitz, and he looks like he could jump right off his collectible stand and rip into a guitar solo. It’s particularly popular with a certain demo.

• “I got mine yesterday and I am on my way to see @lennykravitz tonight!!! I am so excited!” said Crystal, an exuberant commenter on Instagram.
• “I think mama’s gonna start her own Barbie collection 🤩,” an IG swooner named Trixie said.
• “Omg I’m going to buy 2. One for me and one for my mom,” said one half of a multi-generational Kravitz-loving family.

A few commenters wanted to know why it didn’t come with his signature giant scarf, which occasionally envelops Kravitz’s slender frame like a big warm hug.

• “Someone needs to knit him his giant scarf,” said a Redditor who seemed concerned that he might get cold.
• “Does it come with a giant scarf?” another fashionista on Instagram asked.

To be clear, he does not come with the scarf, but he definitely reps the accessories, including sunglasses, a necklace and some super sweet ankle boots. Beggars can’t be choosers, guys.

Barbie Signature Kenbassadors Lenny Kravitz Ken Doll

$69.97 at Walmart

How popular is it already?

Very. The Lenny Kravitz Kenbassador sold out on Amazon within hours of its release, according to Billboard. No word on when the site will restock the official cache, but Amazon resellers are asking $100 or more for the rocker replica.

The doll is sold as a collectible and comes with a certificate of authenticity. Mattel isn’t labeling it as a limited edition, so here’s hoping they crank up the mesh-tank-top production line so we can all get our hands on one.

What else makes this Lenny Kravitz doll so special?

Kravitz is only the second Kenbassador in the Mattel lineup, so it’s a huge honor. LeBron James kicked off the franchise in 2025 with a doll that stood a full half-inch taller than both regular Ken and Kravitz Ken. We don’t think this sizing is to scale.

Has Lenny said anything about this honor?

Yes, he has, and his response was very Kravitz-like: “So cool.”

Kravitz was also involved in the creative process, he told People: “We got it down to all the details of the boots and the jeans and the belt with the holes and the rivets and the tops that I’ve been wearing [on tour]. The glasses are exact replications of the vintage glasses from the late ’60s that I’ve been wearing.”

He even created a sweet homage to his late mother, Roxie Roker. (If you were alive in the 1970s, you’ll know her as Helen Willis on The Jeffersons.) “The necklace around the [doll’s] neck was a necklace that belonged to my mother that I wear.” Kravitz Ken also sports a tattoo of Roker on his forearm, just like in real life.

How can you get a Kravitz Ken for yourself?

For now, you can buy one on Walmart or directly from Mattel, which still has them available (for around $70) as of this writing. If you’re holding out for Amazon or Target, you’ll have to keep refreshing the page. They’re sold out.

Sources:

• Mattel: “Barbie Signature Kenbassadors Lenny Kravitz Ken Doll”
• Billboard: “The Lenny Kravitz Barbie Is Flying Off the Shelves Just Hours After Its Release — Here’s Where to Buy”
• Vogue: “Lenny Kravitz Revives His Ginormous Blanket Scarf in His First TikTok”
• Instagram: “@Barbie”
• Reddit: “Lenny Kravitz officially approves of his Mini-Me! Did you get him (or plan to)?”
• People: “Lenny Kravitz Calls It ‘So Cool’ to Become Only the Second Man to Get His Own Ken Doll (Exclusive)”

These Rare Barbies Could Be Worth $27,000

Barbie Doll Controversies You Forgot About

Childhood Toys That Are Worth Thousands

The post Move Over, Kids—This Barbie’s for Us! Here’s Why Mattel’s New Doll Is Making Adult Women Everywhere Lose Their Minds appeared first on Reader's Digest.

Then comes the pain.

Not ordinary pain either. A strange electric shock shoots down your arm, your fingers start tingling, and you’re left clutching your elbow and wondering why this injury hurts so much. You’re also wondering, perhaps more importantly, why on earth anyone decided to call it the funny bone.

To get to the bottom of both mysteries, we turned to two experts. Madeline Tadley, MD, a hand and upper-extremity surgeon at the Hospital for Special Surgery, explains the science behind that jolt of pain. And language expert Martha Barnette, the longtime co-host of A Way with Words, helps unravel the surprisingly colorful history behind the phrase itself.

Read on for the unfunny details.

Get Reader’s Digest’s Read Up newsletter for more grammar, fun facts, humor, travel and tech all week long.

What is the funny bone, exactly?

Let’s start with the biggest betrayal of all: Your funny bone isn’t actually a bone—it’s a nerve. “The ulnar nerve is one of the major nerves that provides function to the hand,” Dr. Tadley explains. “It provides sensation to the small and ring fingers and controls the small muscles of your hand for fine movements.”

The nerve begins higher up in the body and travels down your arm, continuing all the way to your hand and fingers. The trouble begins when it reaches your elbow. “When it reaches the elbow, the nerve passes directly behind the bony bump on the inside of the elbow, called the medial epicondyle,” Dr. Tadley says.

Just behind that bump is a groove called the cubital tunnel, where the ulnar nerve travels. And unfortunately, there isn’t much padding there. “There is a thin layer of tissue forming the roof of this tunnel, making the nerve relatively close to the skin and vulnerable to this injury,” Dr. Tadley explains.

Translation: Your elbow has a major nerve sitting in a particularly exposed spot, just waiting for you to accidentally introduce it to a doorframe.

How did the funny bone get its name?

“We don’t know who coined the term,” Barnette says. But there are two likely explanations for the name funny bone, and both may have played a role.

The first has to do with the strange sensation you get when you hit the inside of your elbow. Today, we usually think of funny as meaning amusing, but in the early 1800s, the word could also mean odd, peculiar or strange, Barnette explains. And if you’ve ever hit your elbow just right, you know the sensation is definitely strange.

Then there’s the joke that anatomy practically begged people to make. The long bone in your upper arm is called the humerus, which sounds a lot like humorous. And humorous, of course, means funny.

Barnette says there’s no way to know which explanation came first: “Chances are that both evolved around roughly the same time.” Which makes sense. Once people had a weird sensation called funny happening near a bone with a conveniently joke-ready name, the pun was probably irresistible.

How long have people been using this term?

The earliest recorded reference to someone’s funny bone appears in the 1826 British play A Trip to Bath, or, A Peep at the Assemblies, when a character declares, “I wish you’d keep your funny-bone out of my ribs.” Barnette points out that the phrase appears so casually that audiences were apparently expected to understand it already, which means “funny bone was probably floating around well before then,” she says.

And the jokes kept coming. The following year, the London Morning Post ran a gag about a man trying to figure out what a surgeon meant by the phrase os humorous. (Os is a Latin term, often used in medicine, that means “bone.”) His companion guessed that it might mean the funny bone.

How did it gain widespread popularity?

The term funny bone had something going for it that many anatomical terms simply don’t: It’s memorable. Say “ulnar nerve,” and people might look at you blankly. Say “funny bone,” and everyone knows exactly what—and where—you mean. The name is simple, descriptive and just playful enough to stick.

And stick, it did. Over time, funny bone took on a life beyond the elbow, acquiring a metaphorical meaning related to a person’s sense of humor. That’s the sense behind the expression tickle your funny bone, which remains in use today.

The phrase eventually made its way into popular culture. In 1965, the game Operation introduced generations of children to a removable piece called the funny bone. Players had to extract it with a tiny pair of tweezers without touching the sides of the game board—a fittingly nerve-racking way to learn about the body’s most famous “bone” that isn’t actually a bone.

That kind of cultural exposure helped cement the phrase in the popular imagination. Modern dictionaries recognize both meanings—the sensitive spot at the elbow and a person’s sense of humor. And that’s the funny thing about language: Once a catchy name takes hold, anatomical accuracy doesn’t necessarily matter much. Barnette compares it to heartburn. The word has been around for centuries, even though we now know the burning sensation doesn’t come from the heart.

Why does it hurt so darn much when you hit your funny bone?

Here’s where the funny bone stops being funny. “Nerve pain is different from the pain you feel when you strain a muscle or break a bone,” Dr. Tadley says. When you hit your “funny bone,” you briefly compress the ulnar nerve against the humerus, sending pain and tingling down into your fingers. “The painful nerve sensations are often described as burning, electric shocks, or pins and needles,” she says. That sensation is called paresthesia, which occurs when a nerve is irritated, injured or compressed.

Unlike a bruise, which generally hurts where the impact occurred, nerve pain can travel along the nerve’s path. That’s why a hit to your elbow can send tingling all the way down to your ring and little fingers. In other words, your elbow takes the hit, but your hand gets the message.

Are there any other spots on your body that will give you that awful feeling when you hit it?

Oh, absolutely. “When you cross your legs for too long, the nerve on the outside of your knee, called the peroneal nerve, is compressed,” Dr. Tadley says. That pressure causes the nerve to send abnormal sensations along its path. And then? Your foot falls asleep.

“Uncrossing your legs relieves this pressure, the pins and needles gradually fade, and normal sensation returns,” Dr. Tadley explains.

It’s the same basic idea as the funny bone. The difference is that when your foot falls asleep, you usually have a little warning. The funny bone? It attacks without notice. 

What should you do after hitting your funny bone?

First, Dr. Tadley says, “take a deep breath. In most cases, the symptoms settle down fairly quickly.” You can also try straightening your elbow, which can lessen tension on the nerve.

If the area remains sore, Dr. Tadley recommends applying ice or considering an anti-inflammatory medication.

Can you really hurt yourself if you hit your funny bone hard enough?

“A quick bump usually causes only temporary symptoms,” Dr. Tadley says. But if the pain, tingling or numbness lingers, it could indicate a more significant nerve contusion or irritation. And symptoms that happen frequently—or even without hitting your elbow—could signal ongoing pressure on the ulnar nerve, known as cubital tunnel syndrome, she adds. A hand surgeon can help identify the cause and, importantly, prevent potential long-term nerve damage.

So there you have it: The funny bone isn’t a bone, and that shocking sensation is your ulnar nerve talking. Is any of that actually funny? Not really. But the next time you smack your elbow and see your life flash before your eyes, at least you’ll know what’s happening. Whether that makes it hurt any less is another story.

Sources:

• Martha Barnette, language expert, co-host of A Way with Words and author of several books, including Friends with Words: Adventures in Languageland; email interview, Sept. 9, 2026
• Madeline Tadley, MD, hand and upper-extremity surgeon at the Hospital for Special Surgery; email interview, Sept. 4, 2026
• Oxford English Dictionary: “Funny bone”

Where Did the Phrase 'Break a Leg' Come From?

The True Origin of 'Let the Cat Out of the Bag'

Where the Phrase 'Spilling the Beans' Comes From

The post Here’s How the Funny Bone Really Got Its Name—And Why It Hurts So Darn Much When You Hit It appeared first on Reader's Digest.

Discount: 67% off

Medicube skincare is everywhere right now, and this facial serum is no exception. It gently sloughs away dead skin so your face is fresh, smooth, and ready to soak up all that hydration.

Basement Dehumidifier

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 34% off

Trust me, you don’t want to wait until you need a dehumidifier to buy one. Get ahead of the damp and snag this best-selling basement dehumidifier while it’s 33% off.

Wavytalk Thermal Blowout Brush

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 31% off

Secure the perfect blowout with this negative-ion thermal brush. It helps seal the hair cuticle, tame frizz, and boost shine, while multiple heat settings give you total styling control.

Bedsure Faux Fur Throw

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 40% off

Snag this trendy, ultra-cozy faux fur throw for 40% off. The bubble pattern adds depth and texture to the blanket while effortlessly styling your sofa or bed.

Genuine Suede Clogs

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 46% off

Clogs, mules, “potato shoes,” whatever you call them, they’re not going anywhere. Grab the trendy style for less than $30 before next month’s big sale.

Long-Sleeve Crewneck

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 55% off

Score this ribbed base layer for less than $10, just in time for fall. At this price, you might as well grab it in a few colors.

Two-Piece Lounge Sweatsuit

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 38% off

This highly rated matching set makes getting dressed a breeze. Wear it on long travel days, while running errands or lounging at home.

Travel Makeup Brush Case

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 32% off

This long, slim makeup case is perfect for storing brushes while traveling. The clear top and bottom let you easily see what’s inside without unzipping.

Toy Storage Organizer

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 32% off

Tame toy chaos with this organizer featuring multiple shelves, toy bins and built-in bookshelves. It keeps toys and books off the floor while keeping everything within easy reach.

Candle Warmer Lamp

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 43% off

Our editors loved the Marycele Candle Warmer Lamp during our testing of the best candle warmer lamps. It pulls double duty, melting your favorite candle without a flame while casting a warm, cozy glow in your space.

Laura Ashley Electric Kettle

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 30% off

Floral kitchenware had a major moment earlier this year, and Laura Ashley was one of the brands to lead the charge. Now, this pretty powder-blue electric kettle is 30% off on Amazon.

Keurig K-Mini Mate

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 44% off

I just snagged the K-Mini Mate for our guest bedroom—and for the family member who simply can’t wake up without her morning Keurig. I love the pop of color, plus its tiny footprint that makes it perfect for a small side table or desk. Basically, a hotel setup at home.

Fenty Beauty Soft Lit Foundation

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 34% off

Fenty Beauty’s liquid foundation delivers a hydrating, blurring effect for a dreamy soft-focus finish. Try it for yourself (or restock your shade) while it’s more than 30% off.

Hanky Panky Lace Top

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 50% off

Hanky Panky is known for its pretty lace intimates, and this lace top is currently 50% off on Amazon. It’s perfect for layering under sweaters and tops as the temps start to drop.

Weber 3‑Piece Grilling Tool Set

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 49% off

Do I smell the perfect stocking stuffer for Dad? This three-piece grilling tool set from Weber is nearly 50% off ahead of the big sale, just sayin’.

Baby Brezza Bottle Sterilizer and Dryer

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 35% off

This advanced bottle sterilizer and dryer has a large capacity—a new parent’s dream. The one-step system is fast, too, meaning less waiting when baby needs a bottle. It’s currently under $100.

Hydro Flask Tumbler

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 29% off

Water, tea, iced coffee and more, the insulated Hydro Flask Travel Tumbler with an easy-flow straw keeps your favorite drinks cold and your thirst quenched.

Wonderboom 4

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 30% off

Small but mighty, this portable, waterproof speaker delivers balanced sound in a dustproof, floating design. With a 131-foot wireless range and 14 hours of playtime, it’s ready to keep the tunes going all day.

HelloBaby Baby Monitor

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 48% off

This popular baby monitor is a registry favorite for its easy setup, 1,000-foot range and night vision. Plus, its private, no-Wi-Fi design gives new parents a little extra peace of mind.

Hanes Hoodie

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 42% off

This classic fleece hoodie is on sale for less than $20. Dress it up or down, layer it for fall and enjoy a deal that’s hard to beat.

La Roche-Posay Mineral Sunscreen for Face

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 30% off

This popular face sunscreen packs SPF 50 and 100% mineral zinc oxide for broad-spectrum UVA/UVB protection. Its fast-absorbing formula leaves a lightweight, matte finish that layers seamlessly under makeup.

Dreame Bladeless Tower Fan

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 38% off

Looking for a bladeless fan packed with smart features? The Dreame MF10 is our favorite smart tower fan, and right now, you can save more than $100.

L'Oreal Satin Lipstick

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 27% off

This satin-finish lipstick delivers a hydrating boost with ingredients like argan oil and vitamin E. It’s long-lasting, smear-proof and won’t feather, so your lip color stays put.

New Balance 515 V3

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 51% off

These casual sneakers give the classic 515 silhouette a comfort-focused update for all-day wear. Snag them in the go-with-everything cream color for under $50.

The Little Prince Deluxe Edition

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 58% off

This new gift edition of the timeless classic gets a beautiful upgrade with foil-stamped accents and a paper-over-board case. The author’s original illustrations have also been restored to bring back their intricate detail and color.

Under Sink Organizers

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 38% off

These two-tier, stackable acrylic drawers slide out for easy access to everything tucked under the sink. Give your bathroom a tidy upgrade for less while they’re on sale.

Chefman Air Fryer

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 50% off

Ready to retire your old, worn-out air fryer? This compact model lets you customize the cooking time and temperature with its digital touchscreen, making it easy to tackle all your favorite recipes.

Two-Piece Lounge Set

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 37% off

Fall vacation on the calendar? Grab this matching lounge set for under $25. It’s made for cozy hotel mornings, coffee runs and comfy plane rides.

100% Cotton Thermal Blanket

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 31% off

Add an extra layer of warmth to your bed before winter arrives with this thermal blanket. It’s made from 100% cotton, so you can cozy up without synthetic fabrics against your skin.

Scalloped Linen Shower Curtain

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 50% off

Need to replace that old, grimy shower curtain in the guest bathroom? This understated shower curtain pairs with practically any decor, while its scalloped edge adds just enough detail to keep things interesting.

Cushionaire Slides

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 33% off

Snag these cloud-like slides for over 30% off. For around $25, you can grab a pair for lounging at home and another for stepping outside.

Vibration Plate

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 34% off

Curious about the vibration plate trend? Try it without breaking the bank. This vibrating exercise plate is just $40 right now.

Columbia Women's Snow Boot

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 33% off

Don’t wait for the first snowfall to snag new snow boots! The popular Columbia Ice Maiden II is on sale, with waterproof protection, all-weather traction and a cozy fur-lined collar. They’re even rated for cold, heavy-snow days down to -25 degrees Fahrenheit.

The Lord of the Rings Illustrated

Shop on Amazon

Discount: 56% off

A gorgeous special edition of J.R.R. Tolkien’s classic, featuring his own color illustrations, sprayed edges and a ribbon bookmark. It’s a truly special pick for early holiday shopping.

The post The Best Early October Prime Day Lifestyle Deals appeared first on Reader's Digest.

Most of us receive dozens—sometimes even hundreds—of push notifications every day. These notifications can be useful, like when your email app pings you about a time-sensitive job offer, or they can be annoying, like when a friend won’t stop texting you about the boring dude they’re dating. But few people realize that push notifications can also be dangerous. If you allow personal info to show up in your push notifications, it could turn your smartphone or computer into a target.

Luckily, there’s a way to patch up these holes in our cybersecurity armor. To find out how to do that, I reached out to Kayne McGladrey, a cybersecurity consultant and senior member of the Institute of Electrical and Electronics Engineers, and Thorin Klosowski, senior security and privacy activist at the civil liberties nonprofit the Electronic Frontier Foundation.

Read on to learn why push notifications make you vulnerable—and how to hide your data from hackers, government agents and even the nosy pests sitting next to you on the bus.

Get Reader’s Digest’s Read Up newsletter for more tech, travel, cleaning, humor and fun facts all week long.

What kind of personal data could your phone’s push notifications include?

Most apps try to refrain from putting anything too unique or dangerous in a push notification. Your banking app won’t ever include your account number in a push notification, for example. The push notifications you need to worry about are the ones that come from messaging platforms, like the kind I mentioned earlier: text messages, emails and third-party messages from apps like WhatsApp or Slack.

Push notifications can give “a preview into people’s lives that they don’t really think about and that they don’t know they’re inadvertently disclosing,” McGladrey says. That’s because these notifications typically show the exact text of whatever message or email you’ve received. There’s no censor.

That’s not a problem when it’s just your friend texting you “LOL.” But things can get dangerous if, say, your spouse texts you their Social Security number, or a colleague emails you confidential info about work, and that info shows up on your phone’s screen loud and clear.

What’s the larger cybersecurity issue here, exactly?

Bad actors can get ahold of your private push notifications in a few different ways. Some are more complex than others, but they’re all a problem. Here’s what can happen.

Spyware can let hackers see your push notifications

Like the name implies, spyware can let outsiders see what’s happening on your device. It’s usually used to grab your usernames and passwords, but anything that appears on your screen is fair game. That includes push notifications.

In order for spyware to infect your device, you generally have to download an infected file or program. Most spyware will hide itself inside files or apps that look otherwise safe. Believe it or not, when it comes to smartphones, the most malicious spyware tends to be funded and deployed by governments, not lone hackers. China uses this sort of spyware, but so does the United States, Saudi Arabia and more. Governments use spyware to keep tabs on immigrants, journalists, whistleblowers and even human rights activists.

Apple refers to government-linked spyware as “mercenary,” and iPhones have a feature that will explicitly notify you if mercenary spyware is detected on the phone. Most Android phones keep an eye out for this too, though Google will notify you via email.

McGladrey also notes that putting spyware on someone’s phone is an emerging form of domestic abuse. “If you get into an abusive situation and they have access to your devices, [spyware can let an abuser] track their spouse’s movements and activity,” he explains. He adds that removing the spyware is especially risky in these situations, since the abuser will notice as soon as they stop receiving data.

Law enforcement can hack your smartphone

Smartphones have become the most popular way people make plans, talk to friends and store their data, and as a result, they’ve become priority targets for law-enforcement investigations. In fact, this article was inspired by one of these investigations. Earlier this year, reports surfaced that the FBI used an unspecified hacking process to pull deleted push notifications from a defendant’s iPhone. Yes, deleted notifications. The hack exploited a little-known location called the “push notification database,” which stored notifications even after the user deleted them. This let the FBI read messages the defendant had received from the encrypted messaging app Signal.

FYI, Apple has since patched that exploit and called the storing of deleted notifications a “bug.” When reached for comment, an Apple spokesperson didn’t confirm that this update removed the database entirely, but Klosowski believes it no longer stores deleted notifications. Google didn’t respond when asked whether Android devices have the same vulnerability.

In the U.S., however, law-enforcement groups still have access to Cellebrite devices, which can bypass security to copy all of your device’s data. This includes notifications and likely other messages you’ve sent as well. Lastly, border control agents in the U.S. and many other countries have the legal right to search through your phone, computer or other device when you’re entering the country.

Apple and Google see nearly every push notification you receive

When a smartphone app sends a push notification, it has to be routed through a server. That server is usually owned and operated by whoever makes your phone’s operating system: Apple if you’re using an iPhone, and Google if you’re using an Android.

Generally, no one from either company is reading this data. But both companies do retain records of when the notifications were sent, to whom and, occasionally, even what they contained. And when asked by law enforcement, both companies may give this data to investigators. It could also be vulnerable to hackers.

If you’re using a third-party smart device that can display your notifications, like the Meta Glasses, your data might be intercepted by even more companies. “It might be super helpful to have [your notifications] pop up on your glasses,” McGladrey says, “but are you OK with whoever manufactures those glasses getting access to your push notifications?”

Strangers can look over your shoulder and read your screen

OK, this one’s old-school, but it’s still a concern. Everyone’s had that moment where they see a stranger’s screen light up and instinctively glance at it. That’s especially true in crowded places like public transit or while waiting in line.

Most people know it’s rude to snoop and will look away. But others may take the opportunity to read your screen and the notifications plastered on it.

How can you turn off push notifications on an iPhone?

1. Open Settings.
2. Scroll down and tap “Notifications.”
3. To turn off all notifications, tap “Show Previews” and select “Never.”
4. To turn off notifications only for specific apps, select the app, one at a time, and do the following: Tap either “Allow Notifications” at the top of the app to turn it off, or uncheck all three “Alerts” options.

Can you also turn off push notifications on an Android?

Yes, but not all Android phones let you turn off all push notifications at once. Instead, you’ll likely need to turn them off for each app individually.

1. Open Settings, and tap “Apps.”
2. Scroll to select the app you want to disable push notifications for. You may need to tap “All apps” to see the entire list.
3. On the app’s page, tap “Notifications.”
4. Either tap the “Allow notifications” switch at the top to turn them all off, or uncheck the options below it.

Are there any other places you should turn off these notifications?

You may also want to do this on your computer. Here’s what to do for both Mac and Windows.

Mac

1. Open Settings, and click “Notifications” in the sidebar.
2. Click the “Show previews” option, and select “Never.”
3. You can also scroll down the page to disable notifications for specific programs.

Windows

1. Press the Windows key + I to open the Settings menu.
2. Click “System” in the sidebar, then “Notifications” in the menu that appears.
3. Click the “Notifications” switch at the top of the page to turn off all push notifications.
4. You can also scroll down to turn off notifications for specific programs.

Are there any other ways you should protect your push notifications?

If turning off all your notifications seems too extreme or if you want even more protection, there are a few extra steps you can take to stay safe.

• Use secure messaging apps. The best messaging apps feature “end-to-end encryption,” which means that no one besides you and your recipient can see the messages being sent—not even the company that makes the app. For text messages, encrypted apps include Signal and WhatsApp. For email, check out Proton Mail.
• Turn off message previews within your messaging apps. Signal, WhatsApp and Telegram let you turn off push-notification previews within the apps themselves. This means you’ll still receive a notification when someone messages you, but it won’t show the content of the message.
• Regularly audit and delete apps you don’t use. Every app records some amount of data about you. And the scope of that recording can change without your knowledge when the app is updated. If you have apps that you don’t use, it’s safer to delete them than keep them around for no reason. It’ll help you save storage space too.
• Turn off biometric locks. All modern phones and computers let you lock your device with a passcode, and most let you use biometrics (a facial or fingerprint scan) as well. This might be more convenient, but it’s not safer. This is because while law enforcement can’t force you to give them your passcode, the laws around biometrics are murkier. And a police officer can’t read your mind to learn your passcode, but they can hold your phone up to your face to get a scan. McGladrey notes that “the courts are generally still out” on whether this is legal, but it’s better to be safe than sorry.
• Use your device’s “lockdown mode.” Some devices, including all iPhones, have a special mode that will block message attachments, incoming calls from strangers, wired connections and more. This can help protect you from concerted spyware attacks.

Sources:

• Kayne McGladrey, CISSP, cybersecurity expert and senior member of the Institute of Electrical and Electronics Engineers; phone interview, August 2026
• Thorin Klosowski, senior security and privacy activist at the Electronic Frontier Foundation; email interview, August 2026
• Apple spokesperson; email conversation, August 2026
• The Guardian: “Spyware targets Uyghurs by ‘masquerading’ as Android apps – report”
• NPR: “ICE acknowledges it is using powerful spyware”
• The Guardian: “Saudis behind NSO spyware attack on Jamal Khashoggi’s family, leak suggests”
• Apple: “About Apple threat notifications and protecting against mercenary spyware”
• 404 Media: “FBI Extracts Suspect’s Deleted Signal Messages Saved in iPhone Notification Database”
• Apple: “About the security content of iOS 26.4.2 and iPadOS 26.4.2”
• The Intercept: “Use of Controversial Phone-Cracking Tool Is Spreading Across Federal Government”
• Washington Post: “Federal government is using data from push notifications to track contacts”

These Smartphone Apps Could Be Spying on You

How to Turn Old Phones into a Security Cameras

How to Use Your iPhone's Built-in Scanners

The post Warning! Your iPhone’s Notifications Are Full of Sensitive Info—Here’s How to Make Sure It Doesn’t End Up in the Wrong Hands appeared first on Reader's Digest.

But the best hobbies are those that require practice and patience. That’s where at-home pottery kit brand Pottd comes in. These clever at-home pottery kits come with almost everything you need to put together pots, paint mugs or make your bestie an incense burner. And the best part? You don’t need any experience with clay to craft cute pieces. Here’s my experience getting hooked on these all-inclusive kits.

We Tried It

Pottd Pottery Kits

Pinch pots, painted mugs and pressed clay coasters—oh, my! Pottd kits come with dozens of different projects that scratch that creative itch.

Shop on Pottd

Unboxing the kit

There are several kits on Pottd to choose from, which fall into two categories: painting and pottery. Painting kits come with premade items along with the paints to decorate them. Pottd offers dozens of kits that come with things like picture frames, mugs, beer glasses, coasters or vases—you name it.

The pottery kits bring additional choices. Pick from general creativity kits or opt for specific kits that cover things like biscuit-shaped coasters, candle holders, baby keepsakes, sculptural plants, games and more. There are also extras like molds and paints available à la carte.

I opted for a general kit with “retro” paint colors. Pack neatly inside the kit is nearly everything you’ll need to make several different pieces, including:

• 2 bags of eco-friendly Super Clay
• 5 wooden sculpting tools
• 1 potter’s sponge
• 1 pottery paint set of your choice
• 2 artist brushes
• 1 bottle of base coat
• 1 bottle of gloss varnish
• Quick-start guide
• An easel to prop up your guide as you work

Getting started

First, take everything out of the box and arrange it on a flat surface. Now is the perfect time to unfurl that junk mail or those local grocery mailers crowding in your mailbox—they make excellent protection for your table!

The Quick Start guide is a great resource when first setting up your pottery zone. It outlines any extras you might want that don’t come with your kit, such as additional tools. While I didn’t have a ruler or rolling pin on hand, I did take its advice to ensure I had a cup of water set up for smoothing and adding “slip” to the clay. I also grabbed a reusable paper towel to keep messes to a minimum.

Next, I highly recommend setting the mood. If you’re like me, that means adding some background noise and good, solid lighting. While you can absolutely make your pottery in silence, popping on a good podcast, audiobook, or your favorite album helps keep that creativity flowing.

The Quick Start guide also comes with several instruction cards covering projects like a trinket dish, pinch pot, incense burner, vase, draped dish, photo stand and plant pot. Reading through these cards is super helpful when you’re considering your first pieces!

Crafting the clay

For my first project, a pinch pot, I unpacked one of the clay packets and separated out 1/4 of the bag as instructed. The rest goes back into the sealed bag for future projects. I popped the instruction card into the cardboard holder and got started.

Overall, the instructions are detailed and perfect for newbies. They go over each step in an easy-to-follow format, leaving plenty of room for creative choices. I especially appreciated the continued reminders to use water and the included sponge to keep the clay surface nice and slick. This clay tends to crack when it’s dry, so keeping it moist while you work is crucial for a nice, smooth look.

After making my pinch pot, I caught the creativity bug and decided to crank out an incense burner and a draped dish. This time, I also had a clearer direction: I wanted to model them after my favorite noms—breakfast foods! Even after crafting a bacon-shaped incense burner, an egg-shaped dish and my little pinch pot, I still had about a third of my first bag of clay leftover. I didn’t even dip into my second bag, so each box can easily handle several projects.

The hardest part was waiting for the clay to dry, which took about 48 hours. After that, you must apply a base coat, which takes about 1-2 hours to dry. It’s important to ensure that pottery is completely dry before painting. Once dry, it was time to paint my pottery!

Painting party time!

This is the fun part! Using the paints that come in the kit, it’s time to decorate your pottery. For the best results, Pottd recommends working in thin layers and waiting for each layer to dry before adding another. Now is the time to get creative with stripes, spots, murals or whatever inspires you.

I used a reference photo for my bacon incense burner, and I’m pretty pleased with how it turned out! While the kit didn’t come with a white paint for my egg whites, I opted for a baby blue color and think it turned out pretty darn cute. For my pot, I pursued a polka-dotted aesthetic.

Once the paint has dried completely, the final step is to give it a good glaze. This step is optional, but it gives the pottery a more finished look. Plus, the glaze protects the paint from scratches and adds slight water resistance, though it’s best to keep all pottery away from water for the best longevity. Skipping this step gives the pottery a more rustic look, should that be your preferred direction.

Final thoughts

Once you begin making clay pieces from a Pottd kit, it’s quite an addictive hobby! I found myself thinking about my next project soon after finishing my first batch. And because each kit includes so much clay, I was able to make a few pieces to give to friends as gifts as well. Overall, Pottd kits are an easy way to try out a new hobby. I already have my eye on additional kits like the Paint a Tea Set kit and the overstuffed Super Bundle.

Where to buy

We Tried It

Pottd Pottery Kits

Pottd kits span tons of options, including pottery, picture holders and pretty tea sets!

Shop on Pottd

Folks looking for an all-in-one kit that makes it easy to experiment will love how inclusive Pottd kits are. Plus, they make great gifts for creatives or date night activities for couples’ holidays like anniversaries and Valentine’s Day. The brand is always rolling out new kits and creative tools, so check out the Pottd website to see what’s currently trending!

The post We Tried a Beginner’s Pottery Kit—And Now We Wanna Clay All Day appeared first on Reader's Digest.

Unfortunately, gas stoves hide lurking dangers behind that satisfying flame. One major problem is air quality. We’ll dig into the specifics below, but in a recent study published in the International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health, researchers found that nearly 13% of childhood asthma in the United States is caused directly by gas stoves. And that’s just one of the findings.

Even a perfectly functioning gas stove gives off invisible fumes. But keeping your eyes peeled for odd flame colors can help you diagnose major safety risks before they get out of hand. To find out more about gas stoves and safety, I spoke to Troy Legg, a virtual appliance technician with home-warranty company American Home Shield. He has more than 20 years of experience repairing appliances, including gas stoves, and knows exactly what color the flames should be.

Read on to find out what it means if you see different colors and what you should be doing to keep your gas stove in tip-top shape.

Get Reader’s Digest’s Read Up newsletter for more safety, cleaning, humor, travel, tech and fun facts all week long.

What color “should” the flames be on a gas stove?

“A healthy gas-burner flame is usually blue,” Legg says. There’s room for a tiny bit of variation, but not much. “With natural gas, a blue flame with a slight white tip can be normal,” Legg adds. “With liquid propane, a blue flame with a small yellow tip can also be normal.”

But if most of the flame, not just the tip, turns a different color, that’s a signal that something is wrong.

What makes the flames blue?

Blue flames indicate that complete combustion of natural gas is taking place. Natural gas is mostly methane, and when it burns correctly on your stove, all of the fuel gets used up and turned into heat, water vapor and carbon dioxide (CO2). The flames are blue because the light produced within this clean-burning flame has a short wavelength. (Remember the ROYGBIV of a rainbow? The red side has longer wavelengths, and the blue-indigo-violet side has shorter ones.)

Natural gas produces a very hot flame—as high as 3,500 degrees Fahrenheit. In contrast, wood fires burn cooler and less cleanly, giving off soot and wood particles. It’s these particles that produce the campfire-like orange and red flames you should never see on your gas cooktop.

What do orange flames mean?

“A steady yellow or orange flame can signal incomplete combustion, often caused by dirty burners, blocked openings or an improper gas-to-air mixture,” Legg says. Instead of methane converting to CO2 and water vapor, some of the gas is not used and is released into the air, which is not ideal.

But not all situations are reason to panic. “A small amount of white or yellow tipping can be normal depending on the type of gas and the appliance,” Legg says. Dust in the air can create brief yellow flickers, and he says calcium and other minerals may burn orange. “But a flame that is mostly yellow, orange or red should be checked by a professional.”

Why are orange and yellow flames such a big problem?

Because blue flames are the normal state of affairs, the sudden appearance of orange or yellow means your stove is trying to tell you something. Here’s why these flames can be a big problem.

Dangerous gas buildup

“A steady yellow or orange flame may mean the burner is dirty or the gas and air are not mixing properly,” Legg says. Either one can “affect combustion and potentially create a carbon monoxide (CO) risk,” he says. According to the EPA, the air around a properly working gas stove contains about 5 to 15 parts per million (ppm) of CO, and a poorly adjusted one can have levels of 30 ppm or higher.

Carbon monoxide is a colorless, odorless gas that kills hundreds of people every year and sends 100,000 to the emergency room, according to the CDC. Children are particularly vulnerable, as are the elderly and people with breathing conditions. If you have a gas stove, putting in a CO monitor to alert you of high CO levels can be a lifesaver.

Higher gas bills

Orange flames are inefficient and will cost you money. In incomplete combustion, some of the gas coming out of your burners is flat-out wasted, so you have to use more gas to get the right amount of heat for cooking. That will translate into a higher gas bill over time.

Lower air quality

Besides dangerous CO buildup, gas stoves are also known to contribute to poor indoor-air quality more generally (remember that asthma stat). Methane, nitrogen dioxide, benzene and other volatile organic compounds (VOCs) are released from even well-functioning stoves, and if your stove burns inefficiently, it gives off more of them.

Inefficient cooking

This one’s not dangerous, but it could be disappointing if you’re hungry. Gas flames that are uneven or inefficiently burning, which often happens when you’re seeing those orange or yellow flames, can create hot spots, make you crank up the heat and otherwise decrease the quality of your cooking experience.

What other colors signify an issue?

Legg says the main one to watch out for is red. “A red flame is less common and could point to an issue with gas quality, so homeowners should contact their gas provider if they see a persistent red flame,” he says. Gas-quality problems can include a range of issues, from an inconsistent delivery pressure to the presence of impurities that affect how the gas burns. 

Another interesting twist involves the presence of a humidifier in your home. Humidifiers give off water vapor, of course, but that vapor also carries minerals like calcium and potassium. Legg mentioned calcium’s orange color earlier, but also be on the lookout for potassium’s pink or purple hue. Though these color changes are not dangerous, using distilled water will reduce these effects.

What should you do if your flames are the wrong color?

“Start with basic cleaning and inspection,” Legg says. “Make sure the burner cap is seated correctly, then check the burner openings for food, grease or debris.” Turn all knobs to the off position and remove the burner caps and heads. “A paper clip can be used gently to clear blocked burner holes and the small center orifice,” Legg says. Don’t use a wooden toothpick—it might break off, which could block the port and cause gas to back up.

You can also wash the parts of the burner assembly, but avoid soaking them. “Use a damp cloth instead of a soapy or wet cloth, since excess moisture can get into the spark switches and cause unwanted sparking,” Legg says. “After cleaning, make sure all parts are completely dry and properly reassembled before trying the burner again.”

“If the flame remains yellow, orange or red, or if there is any gas smell, stop using the appliance and contact a qualified repair technician or the gas provider,” Legg says. “An unusual flame color or smell can indicate a serious matter and potential safety risk. So if you notice something questionable, don’t wait to contact a professional or your gas provider.”

Sources:

• Troy Legg, virtual appliance technician at American Home Shield; email interview, Sept. 11, 2026
• Science Direct: “Complete Combustion”
• Connecticut Dept. of Energy and Environmental Protection: “What is Natural Gas?”
• EPA: “What is the average level of carbon monoxide in homes?”
• CDC: “Carbon Monoxide Poisoning Basics”
• Whirlpool: “Burner Flames Abnormal Colors – Natural Gas”
• Whirlpool: “Burner Flames Abnormal Colors – LP Gas”
• GE: “Gas Range – What is Normal Operation vs What Requires Service”
• NFPA: “Cooking Safety”
• Tidewater Energy: “What Burns Hotter: Propane or Natural Gas?”
• Environmental Health Perspectives: “Clearing the Air: Gas Stove Emissions and Direct Health Effects”
• International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health: “Population Attributable Fraction of Gas Stoves and Childhood Asthma in the United States”

Here’s Why Your Oven Door Has Tiny Dots on It

Take a Picture of This Room Before Leaving

Warning! Your Dog Can Actually Start a Fire

The post If You See Orange Flames on Your Gas Stove, This Is What It Means appeared first on Reader's Digest.

The latest viral meme, involving a Dr. Seuss character who is definitely not teaching the youth their ABCs, seems silly and ridiculous at first glance—but is actually pretty terrifying. Sharing the meme has also had some very real, very scary consequences that you and your kids should be aware of.

I’ve been on the internet since the mid-1990s, so I have some big Gen X energy around online trends. My biggest fear was getting caught illegally downloading a few songs from Napster. (Which I barely did! I love copyright law!) But when I got a look at this creepy new meme, it had me wishing for the good old days.

To find out about this internet trend that’s increasingly getting the police called and has even led to some teen arrests, I spoke with Lt. Steven Orcutt with the Potter County Sheriff’s Department in Texas. Read on to learn what this viral trend is, why it’s a big deal and how to protect your children from consequences that could follow them around for life.

Get Reader’s Digest’s Read Up newsletter for more news, tech, cleaning, humor, travel and fun facts all week long.

What is the Dr. Seuss meme in question?

@cnn Videos showing a person dressed up as Cat in the Hat roaming streets after dark have spread across social media, even prompting responses from police in Ireland and the UK. But it remains unclear which, if any, of the sightings are real or if they are AI-generated. #catinthehat ♬ original sound – CNN

It’s called the Cat in the Hat meme. “This current trend began as a dark-humor meme using clips from the 2003 Cat in the Hat movie,” says Orcutt. “It has since evolved into an AI-generated hoax trend, where users create realistic-looking images and videos of the Cat in the Hat lurking around homes, neighborhoods, schools and other public spaces.”

The posts started on Snapchat and were circulating in Ireland and the U.K. in August, according to the Guardian. From there, they made their way across the ocean and to multiple platforms, including TikTok and, to a lesser degree, Instagram. The posts can be accompanied by creepy music and even threatening messages.

Why on earth is a Cat in the Hat meme such a problem?

“Many posts claim the character is ‘coming to’ a specific town, school or community in a way of inciting fear or making vague statements of harm,” Orcutt says. Case in point: “On my way to Kentucky next, be looking out,” read one Cat in the Hat message on TikTok. Sometimes the meme has a real-life element, and the character is filmed chasing actual people.

But no matter what form the meme takes, the idea is to sow fear and confusion. “While the trend is not tied to real-world violence, it creates several issues,” Orcutt says.

• Unnecessary fear: Parents, students and the wider community are affected.
• Wasted resources: “The fear creates false reports to schools or law enforcement, requiring resource-intensive responses,” Orcutt says.
• Operational disruptions: “In turn, the reports create a disruption to school operations when posts reference specific campuses,” he explains.
• Potential for escalation: The meme can lead people to mimic or exaggerate the trend for attention. “We’ve already seen that even a single alarming post can trigger copycat sharing or lead students to report concerns, similar to other online hoax trends seen in Amarillo,” Orcutt says.

“In short, it’s an internet hoax,” Orcutt says, “but the reaction to it can create real-world problems.”

Have kids actually been arrested for this?

Yes, several. “This is a national social media hoax, and not a localized threat,” Orcutt says. Teens from all over the country have been caught up in the hype and aftermath.

A 14-year-old in Grand Junction, Colorado, was arrested after posting a version of the meme that referenced a threat to a middle school. A 15-year-old Kansas kid was also detained over the meme, and in Oxford, Mississippi, a “juvenile” is facing terrorism-related charges over threats made to a “large school,” according to Mississippi’s WTVA.

Kids in Louisiana, Connecticut, Georgia and Texas have also been detained. “The Potter County Sheriff’s Office has processed one juvenile in relation to the investigation in our jurisdiction,” Orcutt says. “We, as an agency, encourage those who view anything of this nature to report it when seen and allow us the opportunity to properly investigate for any potential threats.”

How big of a problem is this?

For now, it’s continuing to rise—or at least, reports are on the rise. “These trends will continue to be shared, when seen, until the next wave of trends hit,” Orcutt says. In other words, until the next Socrates-and-skeletons viral meme surfaces, we’re stuck with creepy images of a life-sized human-cat hybrid.

“Although there is no real threat, the imagery can be unsettling, especially for younger students, and posts sometimes spread quickly enough to prompt public worry,” he adds. Be aware, too, that media reports have a tendency to elevate trends to larger-than-life proportions.

That doesn’t mean we shouldn’t take them seriously, but it’s important to keep the threats in perspective. “Locally, reported concerns seem to have been minimal and largely centered around students asking if the images and locations depicted are real,” Orcutt says.

What kind of conversations should you have with your kids about this?

“Parents can play a huge role in reducing the fear and preventing any potential escalation by simply talking openly with their children about hoax trends, reassuring kids that these videos are fabricated and not real, [and] asking their children to report any alarming posts to the proper authorities,” Orcutt says.

Also, parents should explain the potential legal consequences of sharing hoax threats involving schools and students, and “most importantly, be involved with their children by monitoring their social media usage,” he adds.

Sources:

• Lt. Steven Orcutt, Potter County Sheriff’s Office; email interview, Sept. 15, 2026
• Guardian: “U.S. schools and police warn about viral ‘Cat in the Hat’ trend after teens’ arrests”
• WTVA: “Cat in the Hat AI trend leads to arrest”
• City of Grand Junction, Colorado: “No Credible Threat Found in Social Media Incident; Arrest Made”
• Connecticut Post: “Connecticut officials warn of ‘Cat in the Hat’ social media videos that threaten schools”

Here's Why Gen Z Is Nostalgic for Y2K

Common Gen Z Slang Words, Decoded

Here's How to Make Friends with AI

The post Teens Are Getting Arrested After Posting a Dr. Seuss Meme—Here’s What’s Going On appeared first on Reader's Digest.

My mom didn’t let us have “sugar cereals,” as she called them, so whenever I got the chance (at a friend’s house, usually), I’d devour Peanut Butter Cap’n Crunch like I’d been starving in the desert for weeks. Then it was back to Cheerios—though I’ve moved on to cereals with even less sugar these days. Getting old is fun!

As cereal season gets underway for another year, we thought it would be fun to take a look at which cereals are the most popular around the country. And lucky for us, CSP Global, which offers accredited nursing programs in St. Paul, Minnesota, and Portland, Oregon, had already done the heavy lifting.

Ahead, I’ll take you state by state through their delicious survey results filled with cereals you remember as a kid and eat now as an adult. Read on to get a bowlful of knowledge about this breakfast favorite.

Get Reader’s Digest’s Read Up newsletter for more food news, cleaning, humor, travel, tech and fun facts all week long.

How did the report determine the most popular cereal in each state?

We do a lot of Googling these days, so instead of mining grocery stores for sales data or calling people on their phones (who answers those calls, anyway?), CSP Global analyzed Google Trends data to find out exactly which cereals Americans were hungry for.

Why did they do this, you might ask? Because they’re a nursing school, CSP Global wanted to get a sense of state and regional trends to start a conversation about nutrition and health. Cereal aisles across the country look pretty much the same, but when you really drill down on what people are searching for, some definite trends emerge.

What is the most popular cereal in each state?

When you take a look at this list, it’s apparent there’s not a lot of turnover in the cereal world. These are the same old classics we’ve been eating for decades. My mother would definitely not approve of most of them, but they sure sound delicious to me right about now.

Here are the most popular cereals in each state:

• Alabama: Froot Loops
• Alaska: Corn Pops
• Arizona: Honey Bunches of Oats
• Arkansas: Honeycomb
• California: Honey Bunches of Oats
• Colorado: Froot Loops
• Connecticut: Cheerios
• Delaware: Cinnamon Toast Crunch
• Florida: Froot Loops
• Georgia: Froot Loops
• Hawaii: Cocoa Puffs
• Idaho: Rice Krispies
• Illinois: Cookie Crisp
• Indiana: Golden Crisp
• Iowa: Cap’n Crunch
• Kansas: Trix
• Kentucky: Froot Loops
• Louisiana: Froot Loops
• Maine: Raisin Bran
• Maryland: Cinnamon Toast Crunch
• Massachusetts: Trix
• Michigan: Froot Loops
• Minnesota: Wheaties
• Mississippi: Apple Jacks
• Missouri: Froot Loops
• Montana: Rice Krispies
• Nebraska: Lucky Charms
• Nevada: Cocoa Pebbles
• New Hampshire: Cheerios
• New Jersey: Cookie Crisp
• New Mexico: Honey Bunches of Oats
• New York: Cheerios
• North Carolina: Froot Loops
• North Dakota: Special K
• Ohio: Golden Crisp
• Oklahoma: Froot Loops
• Oregon: Froot Loops
• Pennsylvania: Cheerios
• Rhode Island: Fruity Pebbles
• South Carolina: Cinnamon Toast Crunch
• South Dakota: Rice Krispies
• Tennessee: Cookie Crisp
• Texas: Froot Loops
• Utah: Rice Krispies
• Vermont: Cheerios
• Virginia: Froot Loops
• Washington: Trix
• Washington, D.C.: Trix
• West Virginia: Corn Flakes
• Wisconsin: Rice Krispies
• Wyoming: Frosted Mini-Wheats

Which cereal earned the No. 1 spot in the most states?

Froot Loops took the cereal crown with wins in 13 states and was by far the most searched cereal in the entire country. And it wasn’t even close: The tropical-fruit-flavored sugar bomb’s closest competition, Cheerios (yes!) and Rice Krispies, each won only 5 states apiece.

What regional trends emerged?

The cereal analysts also broke out the searches regionally, and it looks like the South gave Froot Loops its dominating win. The Northeast and the Midwest (my old stomping ground) went for the basic grains. Out in the sunny West, Honey Bunches of Oats came in first.

• Northeast: Cheerios
• South: Froot Loops
• West: Honey Bunches of Oats
• Midwest: Rice Krispies

Were there any big surprises?

My beloved old home state of Minnesota was the only state to pick Wheaties … which actually isn’t too much of a surprise, now that I think of it. A Minneapolis radio station aired the very first cereal jingle in 1926, and it was for, yep, Wheaties.

What is surprising is that wheat, in general, turns out to be an unpopular cereal grain, at least as far as searches go. Raisin Bran won only one state, Maine, and Frosted Mini-Wheats also came out on top in a single state, Wyoming.

Here’s another head-scratcher: When is the last time you ate Apple Jacks? I didn’t even know it was still around, but Mississippi loves it. Finally, my old neighbor Iowa is the only state pulling for Cap’n Crunch (but not the clearly superior Peanut Butter version). Funny, I would have thought they’d be all-in for Corn Pops.

Sources:

• CSP Global: “Every State’s Favorite Cereal”
• University of Maryland: “Have you tried Wheaties? The Lost Art of Jingle Writing”

The Most Popular Ice Cream Flavor in Each State

The Most Popular Grilled Food in Each State

The Best Dessert in Every State

The post This Is the Most Popular Cereal in Each State—Did Your Breakfast Favorite Make the List? appeared first on Reader's Digest.

I’m so relieved … but also so rattled. Granted, I wasn’t the best student, and I cut my fair share of classes back in the day, but I was never that clueless. Why does my subconscious do that to me, not to mention bring me back to that time in my life at all? I’m so far past that stage—I have kids who have since graduated from high school!

What’s really terrifying? So many of us have that same exact dream. A recent Amerisleep survey of more than 2,000 people found that being back in school is among the most common recurring dreams out there, right up there with falling and being chased. And in a Psychology Today blog post that surveyed people describing their own recurring school dreams, the most common version reported was almost identical to mine: discovering you’d been enrolled in a class all along, never once attending, and then scrambling to find the exam room on the day it finally counts.

We asked three dream experts—two psychotherapists and a professional dream analyst—to help decode why so many of us are still, apparently, failing a class we may have finished decades ago. Read on to find out what’s going on, what some of our most common school dreams mean and whether they actually have anything to do with school at all.

Get Reader’s Digest’s Read Up newsletter for more psychology, life tips, fun facts, humor, cleaning, travel and tech all week long.

What’s happening in our brains when we dream?

Think of your brain as a warehouse, says Katie Rose, a Manhattan-based psychotherapist. Every day, “boxes” of new experiences get dropped off in a staging area, and your brain’s internal workers—networks involving the hippocampus and amygdala, which handle memory and emotion—sort through them and file them away across a web of connected brain regions.

When you dream, your brain pulls old boxes back off the shelf. And as levels of neurotransmitters shift during REM sleep—acetylcholine rises, stimulating cortical activity and prompting vivid imagery, while norepinephrine and serotonin drop to unusually low levels—those boxes don’t always get put back together the way they were. “The connections your brain makes can be more emotional, symbolic and sometimes seemingly nonsensical than they would be when you’re awake,” Rose says.

“During REM, the brain is far from inactive,” notes John Mayer, PhD, a clinical psychologist based in Chicago. Visual-association areas generate the imagery you see, even though your eyes aren’t taking in any actual visual information, while the amygdala and related limbic structures—which process emotion, threat and personal significance—stay highly active. That’s part of why dreams can feel so emotionally intense.

Memory plays a role too. The hippocampus, which organizes autobiographical and episodic memories, supplies fragments of both recent and older experiences. But rather than replaying a memory exactly as it happened, “the dreaming brain recombines people, places and emotions into new images and stories,” Mayer says. Meanwhile, the brain’s usual reality-check system—the dorsolateral prefrontal cortex, responsible for logic and working memory—is comparatively quiet. That may be why dreams entail bizarre events.

Overall, Mayer explains, “the visual brain is creating, the emotional brain is reacting, the memory system is supplying material, and the logical brain is operating with reduced supervision.”

What does it mean if you’re dreaming about school?

So why does school, specifically, keep getting pulled off the shelf—even for people decades removed from their last final exam? According to our experts, there are a few explanations.

It’s simply where the most material lives

“We spent thousands of hours of our formative years in school—it was the primary space for our learning and social lives,” Rose says. “We would have experienced intensely vulnerable situations there, likely for the first time.” Think: embarrassment over struggling with a new subject, rejection from a friend group or a first taste of real success and leadership. “It makes sense that our brains return to that place in adulthood,” she says. “If our brains are trying to work out a feeling, it may return to school to try to understand the origin of that feeling.”

It was our first real taste of external pressure

“School is often a go-to for stress because the certainty that one would have stressful experiences in school is extremely high,” Mayer says. “This is the first time a child will have these pressures outside of the home when they first attend school—that’s significant and embedded in our brain.” And those stressful experiences only build over the years, from first grade through graduation.

It doubles as the blueprint for career stress

“School was the original training ground for job stress,” says Lauri Loewenberg, a professional dream analyst and the author of Dream on It. “It’s where we first learned the pressure of deadlines, preparation, performance, evaluation, competition, fitting in and moving up to the next level.” Because those emotional associations were formed there, she explains, “school remains the face your subconscious often gives to career stress, even decades after you’ve graduated.”

The details are symbolic, not literal

“I think of it less as the brain saying, ‘A math test means work stress,’ and more as the brain looking for the closest emotional match it has available,” Rose says. In other words, “the math test may not be about math at all,” she says. “It may be the box your brain has on the shelf for ‘This is what it feels like when I am being evaluated and I’m not sure I’m going to be good enough.'”

Sometimes it’s about growth, not stress

“Less often, finding yourself back in school or a class setting in your dream can mean you are currently learning something new in your life—such as a new skill, a new mindset or behavior, a life lesson or basically any situation where you would consider yourself to be ‘learning the ropes,'” Loewenberg says. So if you’re navigating a career pivot, learning how to play mahjong or getting up to speed on new software at work, that classroom feeling may just be your brain reaching for the closest thing it has on file for “still figuring this out.”

It can be triggered by simple, everyday cues

These dreams don’t strike at random. “Dreams are always triggered by some stimulus in our perceptional system,” Mayer notes. Back-to-school season is a classic trigger—store ads, kids heading back to class or just the general rhythm of the calendar can all seep into your dreams, whether or not you’re conscious of it.

What does each type of school dream mean?

Not all school dreams are created equal, and some are definitely more stressful than others. Here’s what our experts say about some of the most common variations.

You haven’t studied for a big test

This is likely the most common school dream. Mayer hears a version of this constantly in his practice—patients dreaming they have a test to take and are completely unprepared, or that they never actually finished their degree and are secretly an imposter. Loewenberg adds: “This dream is often connected to feeling unprepared for an upcoming situation that feels like a big deal. It could be anything from a board meeting or job interview to something more personal, like meeting your future in-laws for the first time.”

She suggests asking yourself: What situation in my waking life feels similar right now? Where do I feel like I’m going to be scrutinized? Where do I really have to prove myself, but I’m feeling uncertain, insecure or not quite up to the task?

The fix isn’t to obsess over being perfectly prepared, she says—it’s to get specific about what would actually help. “Your dream may be highlighting an area where your confidence needs to catch up with your expectations.”

You can’t find your classroom

This one, according to Loewenberg, is less about the test itself and more about the search. “This dream is often the result of feeling that you aren’t where you should be in some area of your waking life,” she says. “It’s a common dream when you haven’t found a job or career that feels like home to you, or when you aren’t quite where you feel you should be in your career.”

The searching itself is the important part. “You’re looking for the classroom because, symbolically, you’re looking for where you belong, where you’re supposed to be focusing your energy or what your next step should be,” Loewenberg explains. Her suggested reframe: Instead of asking why you’re not where you should be, ask why you actually want to be.

An old high school boyfriend or girlfriend shows up

According to Loewenberg, exes rarely show up in dreams to represent themselves. “The high school sweetheart is often our first experience of romantic love,” she says. “So when they show up in a dream, they usually aren’t playing themselves. Rather, they’re standing in for the feelings we first experienced with them: excitement, desire, butterflies, infatuation, feeling chosen or that feeling of never wanting to be apart.”

The trick to decoding it, she says, is to ask what first comes to mind when you think of that person and why that particular feeling might be relevant right now. “If the relationship was wonderful, perhaps you’re craving that kind of excitement, attention, freedom or romance again,” she says.

But if the relationship was a bad one, don’t assume the dream is a sign you want them back. Loewenberg suggests asking yourself: Is anything happening in my life now that makes me feel the way I felt with that person? The bottom line: Focus on the feeling, not the person.

You’re with random classmates you haven’t thought about in years

According to Loewenberg, nothing in a dream is truly random—especially the cast of characters. Dreams borrow from the past in order to give us a message that will help us in our present. “Everything and everyone in your dream stands in for some part of you or for something that is directly affecting you,” she says, “unless it is someone you deal with on a daily basis, like your spouse or your child.”

So, she explains, the way to figure out why you’re dreaming of Josh from chemistry class is to ask yourself what first comes to mind when you think of him. If you remember Josh being the class clown, then that’s what is at play. “It’s not about Josh,” Loewenberg says. It’s about what’s relevant to you currently: not taking things too seriously and having a sense of humor right now.

You’re going back to school as an adult

Loewenberg says most dreams that put you back in a classroom actually keep you as your current-day self—the classroom is just a familiar backdrop your brain reaches for. “The school setting becomes a metaphor for something you’re currently learning, struggling with, being tested on or feeling unprepared for,” she says. So if you dream you’re back in a lecture hall, quizzes and all, but you’re still very much you—crow’s feet, mortgage, hot flashes—it’s probably not about school at all. It’s about whatever test you feel like you’re taking in real life right now, whether that’s a big presentation, a medical diagnosis or just proving to yourself you can still hack it.

Does the meaning change if your dream is about elementary school, high school or college?

According to the Psychology Today survey of people describing their recurring school dreams, 73% of respondents set their dream in high school, compared with 34% in college, 12% in elementary school and 7% in middle school or junior high.

Loewenberg says the specific setting is meaningful, not incidental: “The different stages of school can reflect different stages of learning, growth, confidence or challenge in your waking life.”

• Elementary school “often points to something that is in its early or introductory stages,” Loewenberg says. You may be just starting out or dealing with something that feels simple and manageable. But personal history matters too: If you were bullied in those years, dreaming of elementary school “could indicate that something or someone in your current life is making you feel vulnerable, picked on, excluded or powerless in a similar way.”
• High school “tends to take things up a notch,” Loewenberg says, since it’s typically associated with “social pressures, identity, popularity, fitting in, first relationships, competition, independence and figuring out who you are.” A high school dream might reflect feeling judged, compared or pressured to perform in your current life.
• College, she says, “can represent a more advanced level of learning and development.” It might show up when you’re tackling something more complex, taking on more responsibility or being pushed to grow beyond what you already know.

Rose adds that the setting tends to be personal rather than universal. “Typically, the school where you experienced the most prominent social-emotional growth will be where your brain returns to,” she says. “That will be highly individual based on your experiences.”

Why do certain school dreams recur?

Yes, there’s a reason your brain keeps replaying it instead of letting it go. Mayer compares the brain to “a huge mainframe computer” that will “cycle and cycle that data over and over again” until something changes.

Rose takes a less literal view of what the repetition is doing. “I don’t think our dreams mean anything,” she says, “but they are our brain’s way of making meaning of our world.” A dream on a loop, in her view, isn’t a puzzle with a hidden answer—it’s the brain circling back to an unresolved feeling until something changes how that feeling gets processed.

What should you do when you have one of these dreams?

The good news: You don’t need to overhaul your life every time you dream about a pop quiz or the kid who sat next to you in homeroom. But if a school dream keeps showing up, our experts agree it’s worth paying attention—and each technique below offers a different way in.

• Give the dream a new ending. In his clinical work, Mayer uses a technique he calls “finish off your dream.” If a recurring dream is bothering you, rewrite the ending in a powerful, positive way—for example, turning a failed-test dream into one where you ace the exam and the teacher praises you in front of the class, or picturing your diploma on the wall if the dream involves never having graduated. “Make your finish big, fantastic and positive,” he says. Giving the dream a deliberate, positive ending “puts closure on the dreams” and can stop the loop.
• Talk it through out loud. Rose adds that you shouldn’t assume there’s some hidden message that needs to be decoded—it’s more useful to get curious about what the dream brings up emotionally. “Talking it through out loud with a friend or therapist can be even more helpful” than journaling alone, she says, since putting an internal experience into words can break the cycle of rumination. In sessions, she asks patients what parts of the dream stand out most to them, then works with them to connect it to themes in their present life—or simply to retell the old story “through an awake, adult lens.” As she puts it, “the act of processing the dream out loud is the work.”
• Work from the feeling, not the plot. Loewenberg suggests asking yourself what’s happening in your current life that matches the dream’s emotional tone—unprepared, searching for direction, nostalgic, judged, in over your head—and letting that be your real clue, rather than fixating on the literal details of the dream itself.
• Know when to bring in outside help. Mayer says that if these dreams are affecting your daily functioning or adding real stress to your day, it may be time to talk to a therapist rather than just riding it out.

Why trust us

At Reader’s Digest, we’re committed to producing high-quality content by writers with expertise and experience in their field in consultation with relevant, qualified experts. We rely on reputable primary sources, including government and professional organizations and academic institutions as well as our writers’ personal experiences where appropriate. We verify all facts and data, back them with credible sourcing and revisit them over time to ensure they remain accurate and up to date. Read more about our team, our contributors and our editorial policies.

Sources:

• Katie Rose, LCSW, Manhattan-based psychotherapist; email interview, Aug. 24, 2026
• John Mayer, PhD, clinical psychologist, author of Family Fit: Find Your Balance in Life and creator of Anxiety’s a B!tch; email interview, Aug. 24, 2026
• Lauri Loewenberg, professional dream analyst, author of Dream on It and creator of Dream Chat with Lauri; email interview, Aug. 24, 2026
• Amerisleep: “America’s Most Common Recurring Dreams”
• Psychology Today: “They Dream of School, and None of the Dreams Are Good”

What Happens in Your Brain When You're Angry

This Simple Activity Could Reduce Stress by 22%

This Is How Long It Takes to Break a Habit

The post Here’s Why We Still Have Dreams About Being in School—And What Each Type of Weird School Dream Means appeared first on Reader's Digest.

Nope. I just wasn’t invited. 

The next day, when I saw one of the women, I gingerly asked how the party was. She looked at me sharply and sighed, “I knew that was going to hurt your feelings, but you need to get over it. Not everyone can be invited to everything.” 

That hurt so much it took my breath away. (That was also how I learned I’d been ejected from the friend group.)

That said, I’ve been on the other side too. I’ve planned events and realized that inviting all of my close friends is not logistically feasible unless I want to rent a convention center, hire a catering staff and obtain a liquor license. Sometimes you simply have to choose. And you know what’s sometimes worse than being the person who gets left off the guest list? Being the person staring at the guest list thinking, Well, crap. Who gets cut?

As unkind as my friend (ex-friend?) was, she wasn’t wrong. Not everyone can be invited to everything. It’s not always that dramatic, of course. Not every missed invite means you’re booted from the group, and not every curated invitation list will make you feel like a monster. But the devil is in the details.

So is it really rude not to invite your entire friend group to a night out? How do you navigate that situation without being paralyzed by indecision or renting an event hall? And how do you deal with the hurt feelings that will inevitably happen—especially when they are yours? Let’s figure it out below.

Get Reader’s Digest’s Read Up newsletter for more etiquette, humor, cleaning, travel, tech and fun facts all week long.

The case for not inviting everyone

It boils down to practicality. Some venues and activities simply can’t accommodate an entire friendship ecosystem. Restaurants have tables. Concerts have tickets. Someone’s living room has approximately 3 square feet of available floor space once you put down the charcuterie board. And wedding invite lists can be so intense, they can cause otherwise rational adults to consider moving to another country.

But here’s the thing: It’s completely normal for adults to have relationship tiers. According Dunbar’s Social Theory, most of us can sustain only about 150 meaningful relationships (called Dunbar’s number), with those relationships naturally forming in nested circles. The innermost circle is roughly five people: your ride-or-dies, who you’d call at 2 a.m. in an emergency. The middle circle contains about 15 folks, and they’re the friends you see regularly. The next circle, about 50 friends, are your barbecue-and-birthday-party people. And the largest circle contains approximately 150 people you can maintain reasonably close connections with. Having these types of subgroups of friends isn’t a betrayal of the larger group; it’s just how friendship works. 

Friendship is not one giant bucket labeled PEOPLE I AM OBLIGATED TO INVITE FOREVER. Sometimes you want to have a huge birthday bash. Other times, you want to have tacos with your three best friends and spend two hours discussing the alarming amount of money you just spent on a moisturizer. That’s OK. And there are plenty of other reasons to keep a gathering small. Maybe the activity is something only some friends enjoy. Maybe two people don’t get along and you don’t want to spend your evening doing conflict resolution between martinis. Maybe you want to discuss something deeply personal with one or two people. Maybe you simply haven’t seen a particular friend in six months and want some one-on-one time.

Friendships are allowed to have subgroups. In fact, if you’ve known each other for more than about five minutes, they almost certainly do. However, there’s a big difference between saying “I need a smaller group right now” and “I want everyone to know they weren’t chosen.”

The case for inviting everyone

Hurt feelings. The hard part is that what feels like a perfectly reasonable invitation decision to one person can feel like a declaration of social leprosy to another. The person in the second or third circle may believe they’re in the inner circle—and they may find out they’re not because they open Instagram while eating Cap’n Crunch in bed. I know this because, well, see above.

Research suggests that social exclusion hurts in a very real way. A study from researchers at the University of Basel and Purdue University looked at the effects of ostracism in people’s everyday lives and found that these mundane experiences of being ignored or excluded can rock people’s fundamental feelings of safety, well-being and belonging. More recently, researchers from the University of Basel and the University of Koblenz-Landau looked specifically at social media exclusion. Across five studies involving 1,149 participants, they found that simply not being tagged in an Instagram post could torpedo people’s mental health, especially for those of us with a strong need to belong. Being cut out of a photo was even more upsetting. 

So yes, apparently our brains can look at a picture of six women eating nachos and react as though civilization itself has rejected us. That’s a pretty high emotional price for a plate of cheesy chips. Sometimes the message this sends is accidental, but sometimes it isn’t. Invitations are a way to exert power, control or status within a group. Even when the exclusion isn’t intentionally cruel, the message can still read: I chose them. I didn’t choose you.

Still, that doesn’t mean you should invite everyone to everything. It means that if you’re making a choice, you should understand the risks and recognize that it could have consequences for the friendship. 

The gray areas

I’m not sure I’ve ever covered an etiquette problem with so many gray areas. The whole answer is one giant gray area in a trench coat. Here are the questions I’d ask before deciding whether your guest list is perfectly reasonable or whether you’re about to become the villain in someone’s story arc.

How many people are being left out? If you have a group of 10 and you invite nine to the Friday-night hang, then you haven’t created an intimate situation—you’ve created a mean-girl group.

How often does this happen? If it’s just this once and you have a good reason, it’s probably not a big deal. But if the same person is mysteriously never invited—birthday party, Taco Tuesday, dancing naked under the full moon—then you need to consider if they are actually a friend.

How big is the original group? If you’re coordinating a girls’ night with 15 friends, then what is one more person? On the other hand, if you’re planning dinner for four, then yes, one or more people changes things significantly.

Is this actually a group? If these people are part of a clearly defined friend group that regularly does things together, excluding one or two people can feel much more pointed. But if you’re inviting a few mutuals who happen to be acquainted already, there may be no expectation that every social outing includes everyone.

How did the plan evolve? There’s a difference between “Two of us were already meeting up and two more people joined,” and “I made a list of 20 people and then selected the five people I like best.” The first feels organic. The second feels like The Bachelor, except nobody gets a rose and everyone gets screenshots.

Where is the night out happening? If you’re headed to a private spot or doing something that naturally limits the group size, you can be flexible. But if you are going to a very public place where you’ll run into mutuals or even possibly friends who weren’t invited, you should at least consider how that will feel. 

How official is the event? An official girls’ night out planned two weeks in advance with a calendar invite feels much different than a spontaneous trip to In-N-Out. Spontaneity gives you some etiquette grace.

Are kids or partners invited? Sometimes the friend group is just the girls, while other times it’s a family or couples event. Just make sure everyone knows which it is.

And most importantly: How will the person find out they weren’t invited? Ideally, they won’t. Realistically, they probably will. And if your friend has to find out about your dinner through an Instagram story, a tagged Facebook photo or a conversation at the gym, that can turn an otherwise reasonable decision into a much more painful one. 

What do you do about hurt feelings afterward?

My friend’s “just get over it” was rude, but at least she was honest. Too often, people try to hide or minimize the situation because they think they’re sparing the other person’s feelings. But once someone discovers that eight of their friends went out without them, their feelings are already hurt. Pretending otherwise doesn’t make the hurt disappear. It just adds a second layer of awkwardness.

You don’t necessarily need to apologize for having dinner with other people. You do need to acknowledge that your friend may feel bad. Something as simple as “I can understand why that hurt. It wasn’t meant to say anything about how I feel about you” can go a long way. Notice that I didn’t say “I’m sorry I went to dinner without you.” You are allowed to have other friends. You are allowed to have different friendships with different people. You are allowed to occasionally spend an evening with someone without forming a 30-person committee first.

What you are not allowed to do, if you want to remain a decent human being, is act baffled when someone feels excluded after discovering that the rest of the group went out without them. Feelings are not always logical. Unfortunately, they are also not optional.

The verdict

It is not rude to leave someone off the guest list. It can be rude to leave someone off the guest list. Yes, I realize that is an extremely unsatisfying answer. Welcome to etiquette.

You cannot invite everyone to everything, and you shouldn’t have to. Friendships naturally exist in different circles, and sometimes you want a quiet dinner with three people rather than a 30-person reunion that requires a seating chart and a project manager. But the more clearly you are part of a defined friend group, the more often one person is excluded and the more public the gathering is, the more carefully you should think about how your invitation list will land. And maybe don’t post the pictures to Instagram.

Why trust us

Reader’s Digest has published hundreds of etiquette stories that help readers navigate communication in a changing world. We regularly cover topics such as the best messages to send for any occasion, polite habits that aren’t as polite as they seem, email and texting etiquette, business etiquette, tipping etiquette, travel etiquette and more. We’re committed to producing high-quality content by writers with expertise and experience in their field in consultation with relevant, qualified experts. We rely on reputable primary sources, including government and professional organizations and academic institutions as well as our writers’ personal experiences where appropriate. We verify all facts and data, back them with credible sourcing and revisit them over time to ensure they remain accurate and up to date. Read more about our team, our contributors and our editorial policies.

Sources:

• Computers in Human Behavior: “Why didn’t you tag me?!: Social exclusion from Instagram posts hurts, especially those with a high need to belong”
• Journal of Personality and Social Psychology: “Ostracism in everyday life: A framework of threat and behavioral responses in real life”
• Journal of Personality and Social Psychology: “Cyberostracism: effects of being ignored over the Internet”
• Social Science Space: “Robin Dunbar Explains Why His ‘Number’ Still Counts”

Is It Really Rude to Pull an Irish Exit?

Is It Rude to Bring Store-Bought Food to Parties?

Is It Rude to Take Your Assigned Appetizer Home?

The post Is It Really Rude Not to Invite Your Entire Friend Group to a Night Out? appeared first on Reader's Digest.

I usually discover I need a scanner soon after I’ve congratulated myself for offloading that ugly old printer-scanner combo that was gathering dust in my spare bedroom. Depending on the document that needs scanning and how important I think the quality needs to be, I typically take a picture on my phone, then text or email it to the recipient, or go to FedEx or the UPS Store and have them do it.

Well, color me shocked to learn that I have had a scanner on my phone this entire time! Like, a real scanner that actually scans—not takes a picture that I have to crop and try to fix the lighting and shadows and then pray that the recipient will take pity on my very substandard offering.

If you have an iPhone, you have a scanner too. Most of us actually have two or even three scanners, if you can believe it. Ahead, I’ll show you where to find them and how they work. Read on to learn how to scan things on your iPhone without downloading a third-party app.

Get Reader’s Digest’s Read Up newsletter for more tech, cleaning, humor, travel and fun facts all week long.

Why are third-party scanners problematic?

For one thing, third-party scanners often cost money. My iPhone bill is big enough already, so why would I pay $5 or $10 a month for something that’s already included on my phone? And even though many scanning apps, like the popular AdobeScan, are free to download and use initially, some capabilities (for example, scanning long documents), require an upgrade.

Another perk to the built-in iPhone scanners is that they keep your documents more private, in that you’re not introducing yet another company into the chain. When you sign up for third-party apps, you have to agree to additional terms and conditions beyond what you already have agreed to with Apple. I’m not saying scanner companies will use your info for nefarious purposes, but why add additional eyes when it’s not necessary?

It’s also just easier. With iPhone scanners, there’s no downloading from the App Store and no signing up for yet another service. Anytime I can avoid filling out a form, entering my contact info and email address (and verifying that email address), I’m all in. And if you already have tons of apps eating up your data, why get another one?

Where are the built-in scanners hidden in your iPhone?

Your iPhone has three scanners, one in the Preview app, one in the Files app and one in the Notes app. They use the same scanning interface, but getting to them takes a slightly different approach. (We have step-by-step instructions coming up.) They have the same capabilities as third-party scanners, automatically detecting and capturing your document, cropping out the background and allowing you to save or send them as needed.

The one in the Preview app is probably a little more straightforward, since as soon as you open the app, you’re given the option to Scan Documents. There’s very little room for error because you don’t have to tap through menus to find it.

Do all iPhones have these features?

The Notes and Files app scanners have been around for many years, starting with iOS 11. The Preview one is brand new with iOS 26, which was released in September 2026. So as long as you’re not running a really ancient operating system, your phone should have scanning capabilities.

How do you use the Preview scanner?

To use the Preview scanner, navigate to the Preview icon, which is the one with the photographer’s loupe against a blue background. You can also search for Preview in your App search.

1. Open Preview.
2. Tap “Scan Documents.”
3. Position your document.
4. Allow your phone to capture the image automatically (then skip to Step 8).
5. Alternatively, turn off Auto Shutter to manually scan. (The selection button is on the screen.)
6. Press the Shutter to scan manually.
7. Drag the corners to fit the document edges (manual scan only).
8. Save or retake the image once the scan is complete.

Preview scans can be saved in the Cloud, Files, Documents or anywhere else you’d like to keep the scan.

How do you use the Notes scanner?

The built-in Notes app is nearly as easy as the Preview scanner, but there are a couple more steps. Here’s how to scan a document in Notes.

1. Open Notes.
2. Open an existing Note, or tap the square-and-pencil icon to start a new Note.
3. Tap the paperclip icon to open the attachment menu.
4. Tap “Scan Documents.”
5. Position your document.
6. Allow your phone to capture the image automatically, then skip to step 10.
7. Alternatively, turn off Auto Shutter to manually scan. (The selection button is on the screen.)
8. Press the Shutter to scan manually.
9. Drag the corners to fit the document edges (manual scan only).
10. Save or retake the image once the scan is complete.

Notes scans are saved as new Notes, but you can move them to other locations.

How do you use the Files scanner?

The built-in scanning option in the Files app is very similar to the other options on your iPhone. Navigate to the Files app, then follow these steps.

1. Open Files.
2. Tap the three dots in the upper right.
3. Tap “Scan Documents.”
4. Position your document.
5. Allow your phone to capture the image automatically, then skip to step 9.
6. Alternatively, turn off Auto Shutter to manually scan. (The selection button is on the screen.)
7. Press the Shutter to scan manually.
8. Drag the corners to fit the document edges (manual scan only).
9. Save or retake the image once the scan is complete.

Like with Preview, scans taken in the Files app can be saved in multiple locations within your folder hierarchy.

Do Androids have a similar feature?

Yes. On Google Pixel phones, scanning is available through the Camera app or the Drive app. On Samsung Galaxy phones, you can use the Camera app to scan and the Gallery app to edit the document. Then, export your document as a pdf in the Samsung Notes app.

Sources:

• Apple: “Scan text and documents in Preview on iPhone”
• Apple: “How to scan documents on your iPhone or iPad”
• Google: “Scan documents with your Pixel phone or tablet”
• Samsung Galaxy: “Scan and edit documents on your Galaxy phone or tablet”

This Hidden iPhone Feature Can Save Your Life

I Tried the iPhone App of the Year

You Can Use Your iPhone as Your Real ID

The post Your iPhone Has 3 Built-in Document Scanners—Yes, Really! Here’s How to Use These Hidden Features appeared first on Reader's Digest.

It’s hard to believe, but a third of Americans were born after 9/11. But the effects of the attack—an enhanced surveillance state, increased airport security and military incursions around the world—are felt by everyone. Universal, too, are the stories of heroism, friendship and sacrifice that will forever mark that sad day.

With the 25th anniversary of 9/11 upon us, we put together a list of some of the most important journalism that took us through the day as it happened or examined it from the perspective of time. Ahead, we have 10 remarkable stories about Sept. 11, 2001. Some have been celebrated for decades; others you may never have read.

Read on to look back at the tragedy and perhaps find hope in some of the stories.

Get Reader’s Digest’s Read Up newsletter for more news, real stories, travel, tech and trending topics all week long.

Esquire’s “The Falling Man” (2003)

On Sept. 12, 2001, the Associated Press published a photograph of an unknown man falling headfirst from the north tower of the World Trade Center. In 2003, Esquire journalist Tom Junod set out to determine who the man was by reviewing the entire series of 12 photographs taken by AP photographer Richard Drew. The result explores collective grief and trauma and has become one of the defining pieces of journalism from the post–9/11 era.

Read more at Esquire

The New York Times’s “102 Minutes” (2002)

The title of this piece refers to the amount of time that elapsed between the first plane hitting the north tower at 8:46 a.m. and its collapse at 10:28 a.m. Eight months after the attack, the New York Times published an accounting of those 102 minutes by piecing together emails and phone calls from those trapped and killed, as well as recollections from survivors. It’s as chilling now as it was when it was first published.

Read more at The New York Times

The Wall Street Journal’s breaking news reporting (2001)

The staff of the Wall Street Journal won the Pulitzer Prize for Breaking News Reporting in 2002 for its 9/11 coverage. That coverage included real-time reports of the planes and collapses as well as potential impacts, including to airport security and the economy, as they were happening. One particularly harrowing story is a first-person accounting of that day called “The Eye of the Storm: One Journey Through Desperation and Chaos,” by John Bussey.

You can read all of the winning coverage at the Pulitzer Prize page, below.

Read more at The Pulitzer Prizes

The Washington Post’s “September 11, 2001” (2001)

This narrative account, published just days after 9/11, weaves together events at the World Trade Center, the Pentagon and the final moments of United Flight 93, which went down in Pennsylvania. David Maraniss reconstructs the day through survivor accounts and reporting that paint a vivid picture of the chaos and destruction, as well as how it was seen through the eyes of people living through it in real time.

Read more at The Washington Post

The Atlantic’s “Twenty Years Gone” (2021)

Jennifer Senior’s devastating account of one family’s loss after the attacks won the 2022 Pulitzer Prize for Feature Writing. Bobby McIlvaine was just 26 years old on Sept. 11, 2001, and the story of the different ways his family coped with losing their charming and ambitious son, brother and boyfriend reminds us that grief is unpredictable and personal.

Read more at The Atlantic

The New Yorker’s “The Real Heroes Are Dead” (2002)

Rick Resorla, a former British paratrooper and U.S. Army veteran, was the head of security for Morgan Stanley in the south tower of the World Trade Center. Credited with saving thousands of people, he died when he went back inside to offer more help. This piece by James B. Stewart tells the story of that day through the lens of Resorla’s personal life before the attacks, as well as through his loved ones, who subsequently had to process his heroism and death.

Read more at The New Yorker

The Washington Post’s “The Days After” (2001)

This story, published just weeks after 9/11, looks at the lives of five people who were affected by the attacks and how they dealt with the immediate aftermath. A priest delivers a mass, a widow gives her daughter a bath, a firefighter can’t stop thinking of falling bodies. It’s an intimate look at “five people out of the multitudes,” and it stays with you.

Read more at The Washington Post

Esquire’s “Drinking at 1,300 ft.: A 9/11 Story About Wine and Wisdom” (2011)

Windows on the World was a celebrated restaurant at the top of the north tower, and when the first plane hit the building, all escape routes for the 170 employees and patrons who were there that morning were severed. This story, which won a James Beard Award for Best Personal Essay, is told by Cal Sussman, a writer who took a wine class and then became a sommelier at Windows on the World. It works through survivor’s grief and paints a touching portrait of a beloved New York City institution.

Read more at Esquire

The Guardian’s “25 years ago, two strangers met in the twin towers …” (2026)

Stanley Praimnath and Brian Clark worked on the south tower’s 81st and 84th floors, respectively, and they are two of only four known survivors of the floors above the impact zone. Clark made the fateful decision to go down the only open stairwell, ignoring pleas from others to go up to the roof, and heard Praimnath calling for help. Both reached the ground floor and ran from the building just as it collapsed, and they are still friends to this day.

Read more at The Guardian

National Geographic’s “The 17 Minutes That Changed America” (2026)

This comprehensive retrospective of the first minutes of the attack combines narrative text, photography, video and data journalism to tell the story of what was happening on the ground as the day unfolded. The 17 minutes refers to the time between the first plane hitting the north tower and the second hitting the south one, and reporter Garrett M. Graff highlights a range of accounts from regular people as well as military and government officials about the confusion of that day.

Read more at National Geographic

Questions People Still Have About 9/11

A 9/11 Survivor Rescued a Pilot from Icy Waters

Real-Life Heroes Who Are Changing the World

The post It’s Been 25 Years Since 9/11—These Are the 10 Most Powerful Stories About the Tragedy appeared first on Reader's Digest.

But even if the extent of your football knowledge is the name of the team your family roots for, you’ve seen the huddle: The action ends, the players wander back toward one another, and suddenly they’re standing shoulder to shoulder in a little circle. There’s some serious discussion, a few nods, and then they break apart and race to their positions.

It happens over and over, in every football game. It’s such a familiar part of the sport that most of us never stop to wonder about it. But why do football players huddle?

As it turns out, this football staple has a very distinct origin—and it’s one you’d likely never guess. For the deets on one of football’s most recognizable rituals, I turned to two experts: football historian Ken Crippen, founder of the Football Learning Academy, and Jon Kendle, vice president of Archives and Exhibits at the Pro Football Hall of Fame.

Whether you know a blitz from a nickel package or just enjoy the game (or the snacks), we guarantee that you’ll find this fascinating. Read on for the answer before kickoff.

Get Reader’s Digest’s Read Up newsletter for more fun facts, entertainment, humor, travel and tech.

How did football get its start?

The roots of American football trace back to both soccer and rugby, with the first college football game between Rutgers and Princeton in 1869. In the 1880s, Yale player and coach Walter Camp, who became known as the “father of American football,” helped establish rules that increasingly separated American football from rugby.

The game was barely recognizable by today’s standards. “When it first emerged, forward passing was illegal,” says Crippen. “You would see mass-momentum plays and a lot of physicality.”

And that physicality could be deadly. “So many players died on the field that they would have running counts in the newspapers,” he adds. Football was a game still figuring itself out, from how it was played to how teams communicated in the middle of it.

How did players communicate before the huddle?

In the early days of football, quarterbacks simply called or signaled the play—often right at the line of scrimmage. Of course, this “was a problem because the defense could hear the play call,” Crippen notes.

Another option was to call the play while the team was approaching the line of scrimmage, “but far enough away that the defense could not hear them,” he says.

That created an obvious strategic problem: If the defense could hear the play call, it could adjust accordingly. Teams needed a way to communicate without giving away their plans.

How did the huddle get its start?

The football huddle is widely credited to Gallaudet College, now Gallaudet University, a school for deaf students in Washington, D.C. Gallaudet’s football team was made up of deaf players who communicated using sign language, creating a unique challenge on the field.

Because their opponents were often schools for the hearing-impaired, Gallaudet quarterback Paul Hubbard worried they were watching his hands to read his team’s intentions, according to Kendle. Hubbard’s solution was to form a circle so opponents couldn’t read his signs.

That circle became the first football huddle. The exact game in which it debuted is unknown, but Crippen says the practice appears to have developed organically during Gallaudet’s 1894 season, when the team primarily played the Pennsylvania School for the Deaf and the New York School for the Deaf.

When did the huddle become widespread, and why?

The huddle—which Kendle calls “a magical and special place of trust”—didn’t immediately become a universal part of football.

Amos Alonzo Stagg, one of the sport’s great early innovators, began using the huddle while coaching at the University of Chicago in 1896. But it took a while for the rest of football to catch on. “Stagg was an innovator, and whatever he did was usually copied by other college teams,” Crippen says. Still, the huddle “did not really catch on until the 1920s.”

But the huddle’s usefulness created a new problem: Teams could use it to waste time. “Some saw it as an intentional stall tactic,” Crippen says. That led to rules in the 1930s designed to keep teams from spending too much time in the huddle. Eventually, the introduction of the play clock in 1976 made those restrictions unnecessary. Today, the NFL gives offenses a set amount of time to begin the next play. 

What are the rules of the huddle?

Here’s the funny thing: There’s no rule saying a football team needs to huddle. According to the current NFL Rulebook, “a huddle is the action of two or more players in the field of play or in the end zone who, instead of assuming their normal position for the snap, free kick or fair catch kick, form a group for receiving instructions for the next play or for any other reason.”

What happens inside that circle is up to the offense. In a typical huddle, the quarterback communicates instructions for the next play. That, notes Kendle, can “be for the formation, motions, snap count, blocking schemes, wide receiver routes and which gap the running back should run through.”

The huddle also gives the offense a moment to take stock. “It allows the team to see who is hurt, tired or seeing something that the offense can take advantage of against the defense,” Crippen says.

Kendle adds that the huddle can conceal the offense’s formation, making it more difficult for the defense to line up correctly before the snap.

Why doesn’t the offense huddle before every play?

Because sometimes the best way to beat a defense is to deny it time to respond. Enter the no-huddle offense: Rather than gathering to discuss the next play, the offense lines up immediately. The NFL describes it as a strategy that can conserve time, catch the defense off guard and prevent defensive substitutions.

In the 1980s and early 1990s, the Cincinnati Bengals and Buffalo Bills featured “no-huddle” offenses, according to Kendle. The Bills and their “hurry-up” offense advanced to four consecutive Super Bowls.

By the way: No-huddle football is hardly new. Crippen traces its use back to John Heisman (yes, the trophy is named for him), who used the offense at Auburn in 1899.

How is technology changing this football staple?

If the huddle was invented to make communication easier and more secretive, modern technology has made communicating plays much easier.

In the 1940s, Cleveland Browns coach Paul Brown used a “messenger guard” system, in which a substitute player could enter the game with the play from the sideline. Brown also experimented with radio headsets in the 1950s, though it wasn’t until 1994 that the NFL instituted radio helmets to allow limited communication from the sidelines to the quarterback on the field, according to Kendle.

Technology has continued to advance football communication. In 2023, Gallaudet University and AT&T debuted a 5G-connected football helmet that allowed a coach to select a play on a tablet and send it to a digital display inside the quarterback’s helmet.

Will the football huddle ever disappear?

Probably not—or, at least, not entirely.

“I believe the huddle is still an essential part of football,” Kendle says. “It allows the team to come together as a unit to receive critical instructions and make sure they are on the same page.”

So the next time you watch a football game and see the offense gather around their quarterback, take a second to appreciate what you’re actually looking at. The huddle may look like a simple pause between plays, but it’s one of football’s most enduring strategic tools—giving players a moment to communicate, regroup and figure out what comes next.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a football game to watch.

Sources:

• Ken Crippen, football historian and founder, lead instructor and podcaster at the Football Learning Academy; email interview, Sept. 4, 2026
• Jon Kendle, vice president of Archives and Exhibits at the Pro Football Hall of Fame; email interview, Sept. 8, 2026
• The History of American College Football by Christian Anderson
• NFL: “2026 NFL Rulebook”
• Gallaudet University: “Our Gallaudet Football Team Makes History … Again!”

The Greatest Sports Movies of All Time

Sports Quotes to Use On and Off the Field

Everyday Terms That Originated in Sports

The post You’ll Never Guess How the Football Huddle Got Its Start—Here’s the Fascinating History Behind This Strategy appeared first on Reader's Digest.