Real Life Parenting

BabyNames.com Announces Top Names of 2006

2007-01-01T16:55:00.000-08:00

LOS ANGELES, Dec. 11 /PRNewswire/ -- According to the popular website BabyNames.com, Ava and Aidan were the top names for 2006. For the first time in five years, Madison slipped from the number one girl's name to number four. On the boys' side, rhyming names Aiden, Caden, Braden and Jaden continue to dominate the charts.

The BabyNames.com Top Names List is calculated from the favorite name lists of over a million site members for the year 2006. "Celebrity culture always has an influence on naming trends," says Jennifer Moss, founder and CEO of BabyNames.com, "but it seems like it has increased in recent years."

Moss says the name Ava started becoming popular after celebrity couple Reese Witherspoon and Ryan Phillipe chose the name for their daughter in 1999. Other celeb parents who chose the name Ava include X-Man Hugh Jackman and TV star Heather Locklear.

But if you think the Federlines were the first celeb couple to go with the name Jayden, you are mistaken. Jaden (and its various spellings) first started appearing on BabyNames.com lists after Will Smith and Jada Pinkett chose the name for their son back in 1998.

"It usually takes 3-4 years for a new name to make it from the celebrities to the masses," says Moss, "and that's only if the names are not too wild!"

So although Pilot Inspektor and Fifi Trixibelle will probably not be topping the charts anytime soon, keep an eye out for Suri [Cruise] and Shiloh [Jolie-Pitt] to appear in the forthcoming years.

THE BABYNAMES.COM MOST POPULAR NAMES for 2006
BOYS GIRLS

1. AIDAN/AIDEN/ADEN = 1. AVA +
2. CADEN/KADEN = 2. ABIGAIL +
3. BRADEN/BRAYDEN/BRAEDEN + 3. KAELYN/CAILYN +
4. JADEN/JAYDEN + 4. MADISON -
5. ETHAN - 5. EMMA -
6. CONNOR/CONNER + 6. ISABELLA +
7. ADDISON + 7. BAILEY +
8. RILEY + 8. CHLOE -
9. CALEB - 9. OLIVIA +
10. LOGAN - 10. HANNAH +
11. HAYDEN - 11. ISABELLE/ISABEL +
12. DYLAN - 12. GRACE +
13. NOAH - 13. ELLA +
14. AVERY + 14. ABBY/ABBIE +
15. JACOB - 15. CADENCE -
16. RYAN - 16. ALEXIS -
17. CAMERON - 17. TAYLOR -
18. ALEXANDER + 18. PAIGE +
19. AARON + 19. HAILEY -
20. TRISTAN + 20. EMILY -

+ Increased position from 2005
- Decreased position from 2005
= Same rank as 2005

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New Poll Shows Parents Afraid of Talking to Their Teens; Avoid Tough Topics, Especially Drug Use

2007-01-01T16:48:00.000-08:00

Top Five Reasons Parents Don't Talk About Drugs with Their Teens. (PRNewsFoto/Office of National Drug Control Policy (ONDCP))

WASHINGTON, DC UNITED STATES 12/06/2006

White House Urges Parents to Sharpen Conversation Skills, Monitor Teens'
Activities

WASHINGTON, Dec. 6 /PRNewswire/ -- The White House Office of National
Drug Control Policy (ONDCP) is urging parents to sharpen their conversation
skills and monitor their teen's activities, after a new poll shows that
most parents have difficulty getting through to their teens about important
subjects, especially drug use. According to a new survey by VitalSmarts,
most parents of teens indicate that they are even afraid to talk to their
teens about everyday issues.

The survey shows that a majority of parents (57%) admit to having some
degree of difficulty in getting their teens involved in meaningful
conversations about their concerns, such as who their friends are, how they
dress, and how school is going. An even greater number of parents (74%)
have difficulty getting their teens to respond to these concerns and are
not sure their teens are even listening when they do talk.

And when it comes to tough topics, like drug use, most parents (52%)
admit to some degree of difficulty with those conversations. Even more
troubling is that parents know drugs are part of a teen's world today. More
than half of parents surveyed (56%) believe their teen goes to parties
where drugs are available and nearly half of parents (48%) believe their
teen has friends who use drugs. Despite that, few parents are doing
anything about it.

"This poll reinforces a disconcerting trend we're seeing with parents
today. Too many parents are avoiding tough conversations -- or tough
stances -- because they're afraid of jeopardizing their relationship with
their teen," said John P. Walters, Director of National Drug Control
Policy. "Parents must follow through on their responsibilities and set
clear rules against drug use."

According to the VitalSmarts survey, the strategy most often used by
parents to monitor their teen's activities is to keep the fridge stocked
with food so teens and their friends will be more likely to hang out at
home under parental supervision (52%). Few parents are checking up on their
teen (7%), asking questions to try to find out what's going on when it
comes to drugs (21%), or going through their teens' belongings (29%), even
though research shows that teens who are not regularly monitored by the
parents are four times more likely to use drugs.

And when parents have wondered if their teen might be exposed to drugs,
26 percent of them did not speak up because they did not believe their teen
would be influenced by drugs. Others did not speak up because they had
already discussed drugs with their teen in the past (20%), they worried
that their teen would deny there was a problem (17%), or that initiating
the conversation would communicate a lack of trust to their teen (13%).

"There isn't a more crucial parenting conversation than talking to a
teenager about drugs. And most parents feel entirely inadequate, so they
procrastinate it or speak up badly," said Joseph Grenny, co-founder,
VitalSmarts and author of Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When
Stakes are High. "Our research offers good news to millions of parents --
we've found the difference between success and failure in these crucial
conversations is a few powerful and learnable skills. Many parents feel
like they have to choose between peace and parenting, but that's not true."

Grenny has some tips to help parents improve their conversation skills
about drug use:
1. Keep your best motives in mind by asking yourself what you really want;
2. Make it safe for your teen to talk; state what you don't intend and
what you do intend;
3. Confront with facts about what's happening, not judgments;
4. Discuss, agree on, and stick with boundaries; and
5. Evaluate the dialogue to make sure it's a two-way conversation.

Parents can visit http://www.TheAntiDrug.com for additional advice and
information from VitalSmarts and the National Youth Anti-Drug Media
Campaign, including sample conversation starters and a tip card that
parents can download or order for free.

To raise awareness among parents and provide them with tips on honing
their conversation skills, ONDCP is publishing an Open Letter to Parents
this week in 41 local newspapers nationwide as well as select national
newspapers and magazines. Ten family and medical organizations signed the
letter, including the American Academy of Family Physicians, American
Academy of Pediatrics, American Medical Association, Children Now, Dads &
Daughters, National Center for Fathering, Partnership for a Drug-Free
America, PTA, VitalSmarts, and YMCA of the USA.

VitalSmarts specializes in corporate training and organizational
performance, with award-winning training products based on more than 25
years of ongoing research. VitalSmarts is home to the award-winning Crucial
Conversations(R) Training and New York Times bestselling book of the same
title, Crucial Conversations: Tools for Talking When Stakes are High, a
powerful set of influence tools that build teams, enrich relationships, and
improve end results.

Since its inception in 1998, the ONDCP's National Youth Anti-Drug Media
Campaign has conducted outreach to millions of parents and teens and
hundreds of communities to prevent and reduce teen drug use. Counting on an
unprecedented blend of public and private partnerships, non-profit
community service organizations, volunteerism and youth-to-youth
communications, the Campaign is designed to reach Americans of diverse
backgrounds with effective anti-drug messages.
For more information on the ONDCP National Youth Anti-Drug Media Campaign,
visit http://www.MediaCampaign.org

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Lonely This Christmas

2006-12-28T23:40:00.000-08:00

Gosh, I've neglected this blog way too long now, been so busy getting my new game site TrafficGamers.com up and running and it's new blog installed that I've forgotten almost everything else.

Mind you, I've had plenty of time to work on my internet stuff the past week due to not having ANY parental responsibilities at all over the Christmas period. I didn't even do Christmas this year, what a bummer that was!

The plan was to try to forget about it because I feel it has become way too commercialised these days, so I didn't do any shopping this year and I let my 4 kids go to France to spend the holiday with their Gran.

Didn't really miss all the hustle and bustle at all, and saved a lot of money too. But OMG! I missed the kids like crazy! Cried most of Christmas Eve, stayed up all night, cried All Christmas morning and then went to bed and slept away the rest of the day.

My fiance (Hugh) did exactly the same. :p

I thought I was doing right by the kids and my mum, but ya know what? Next year she can come see us instead, cos I don't ever want to spend another Christmas without em!

So yeah, even though it's all 'buy this, buy that', I'll definitely be doing a 'normal' Christmas next year! There's still just something special about the whole thing, and I'm not ever going to miss it again!

Anna

(looking forward to using all that saved money in the 'after Christmas' sales, to have Christmas in January instead LOL)

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Arts and Crafts Idea: Foam Sheet Glasses Case

2006-11-10T03:38:00.000-08:00

Arts and Crafts Idea: Foam Sheet Glasses Case

Are you a camp director, teacher, or homeschool mom looking for a new arts and crafts idea for your kids? Or maybe you are a recreation director at a senior center or nursing home and could use a new project. Either way, this arts and crafts idea will be interesting and fun for all. This glass case can be used, given as a gift, or converted into a necklace purse.

To make the glasses case, you will need the following simple materials: a square of craft foam, plastic or large blunt needles, lanyard lace or thick yarn. Cut two rectangles from the foam, each 3-1/2 inches (9 cm.) by 6 inches (15 cm.).

With a hole punch, make holes on three sides of each rectangle, leaving one short side unpunched. Make the holes 1/2 inch apart and allow at least 1/4 inch between the hole and the edge of the craft foam. The holes need to line up so that the two pieces can be laced together. If you are preparing the craft for small children, you should make the holes yourself. Otherwise, the crafters can do this step if you have enough pairs of hole punches.

At this point the crafters can cut decorative shapes from other colors of craft foam, or you can buy sets of ready-cut foam shapes. If you are doing the craft at a special event, like vacation Bible school, choose shapes that echo the theme of the event. For instance, if the Bible school or camp has a cowboy theme, find shapes that fit well, such as boots, cowboy hats, and stars. Let the kids choose the shapes they like and glue on as desired. You might also like to provide beads or sequins to glue on as well, especially if the crafters are a little older.

The next step in this arts and crafts idea is to thread the plastic needle with the yarn or lanyard lace. Yarn might be a little easier to handle, but lanyard lace is shiny and attractive. In a pinch, some teachers of small children use a bobby pin as a needle. It is certainly a safe alternative. Simply loop the yarn through the opening and use the open end of the bobby pin as if it were the point of the needle. The children can now begin to lace the front and back of the glasses case together.

To turn this arts and crafts idea into a necklace purse, simply attach a piece of lanyard lace to each corner making a long handle. Kids will enjoy using this case as a place to store secret notes and small objects. If they'd rather, they can give the glasses case to a parent, grandparent, or friend who wears glasses. Either way, this arts and crafts idea will be interesting for all.

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Family Holidays: Tips for Peace and Harmony

2006-11-02T13:43:00.000-08:00

What do you like to do on family holidays? Go to the beach or spend a week in the country? Maybe you like camping or visiting relatives. Whatever you enjoy, family holidays are a chance for everyone in the family to get reacquainted and spend quality time together. It's a chance for parents to really talk with their teens and find out what's going on in their lives. It's important to keep the communication lines open, and a family holiday is a good time to do that. Having a good relationship with their parents is one of the most important factors in keeping teens out of trouble.

Studies have shown that when families take holidays together, they are more likely to eat together and are less likely to argue. They do not watch as much television because they are involved in doing things together. Kids even report that their parents seem to act differently while on holiday.

While family holidays are a good time to connect with your kids, communication problems that are already there will not automatically disappear. Especially with teenagers it is important to listen and be flexible. Find out what the kids would like to do and eat and plan accordingly. While even teenagers need boundaries, it is important for parents to try to avoid needless confrontation. Explain why you make the decisions you do and show them positive attention.

Kids will appreciate being included in travel plans. There's a good chance they will choose a theme park or the beach if those are among the options. Sometimes it works well for a teenager to take a special friend along on family holidays. While this might increase the parents' load, the teen is likely to really appreciate it. Also, sometimes it works well for kids to go on holidays with their grandparents instead of their parents. Sometimes there is a special relationship here that can help kids open up and communicate about their concerns.

While on family holidays, if teens are uncooperative or behave improperly, try to deal with the problem in private. Teens are very aware of embarrassmant and it is needlessly mean to exploit this sensitivity. In fact, you might explain to the kids how their behavior embarrasses you, and they in turn might work harder at getting along and acting appropriately.

Kids will be happier on family vacations if they have snacks, drinks, and entertainment. Few kids enjoy a long ride in the car! Try to provide individual CD players or hand-held video games, and don't forget to take plenty of bathroom stops. Sometimes kids enjoy the ride more if they can help you follow the map. This is an educational activity for them as well. By following these suggestions, your family holidays can make a happy memory.

Please do feel free to leave me a comment and I'll get back to you as soon as I can.

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After school activities and burnout

2006-10-14T04:45:00.000-07:00

For millions of parents around the world, the day does not end with the school bell. There are still pictures to be painted, songs to be sung and games to be played. This all adds up to keeping children happy, safe and out of trouble. But, parents have to steer away from going overboard.

After school is not baby-sitting:

After school activities thrive only if it is backed by sufficient parental involvement. What would a soccer match be without parents cheering their little heroes from the sidelines?.

Research and choose:

Instead of convenience being the decisive factor, find out things that will interest your child. Once you select a program, get the fine print and find out what you have to contribute.

Free time:

Many children attend piano classes, followed by ballet and squeeze in some time for play dates in between just before they rush home in time for bed. This rigor is too much for a child. So, go slow.

When to quit:

Often, parents enroll their child in an activity to discover that he may not be the prodigy they thought he would be. This is the time to let go. Your child may not become the next wonder-kid. But, let him cultivate an interest that he enjoys. Remember, happiness and fulfillment are all that matter.

Anna
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Activities For Sunny Days #4

2006-09-24T03:13:00.000-07:00

Neighbourhood Walk:

Believe it or not, most kids like to actually learn about the area where they live. Take them out for a walk in your neighbourhood and let them explore the houses, parks and shops in the area. Talk about the older buildings and imagine what life might have been like in the “olden days”

A trip to the local library can be good fun and useful for researching “the way it was” in your area, and it can use up a lot of otherwise fruitless hours of kids having nothing to do.

Anna

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Activities For Sunny Days #3

2006-09-20T03:31:00.000-07:00

Nature Walks:

Nature walks are one of the most inexpensive boredom busters ever created. All you need is energy and wide-open eyes. Of course, you can make the whole walk a lot more interesting by having something specific to look for.

Luckily for townsfolk and city people, nature isn’t just about being out in the country. Wherever there are trees, there’s going to be birds. Where there’s grass growing, flowers and weeds grow etc.

Borrow a book about wild flowers, birds or animals from your local library and refer to it every time the kids see something of interest. Take along a notepad and pencil for each of the kids to write down what they saw on the walk.

Anna
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Activities For Sunny Days #2

2006-09-17T08:37:00.000-07:00

Ring Toss:

You need a few plastic bottles filled with water, sand or small stones (2 litre bottles are best) and some paper plates. Buy a packet of at least 20 cheap paper plates. Glue 2 paper plates together and cut out the middles to make a ring. When you glue 2 together it will add weight to the rings.

Paint the newly created rings in bright colours and hand them out to the kids. Make a line with chalk or rope for them to stand behind and place the bottles at various intervals and distances away from the children.

Anybody who manages to get a ring over a bottle takes one step back and tries again. See how far away they can get and still manage to ring the bottles.

Anna

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Activities For Sunny Days #1

2006-09-16T08:15:00.000-07:00

Ribbon Sticks:

For this you need nothing more than some strips of wide ribbon and some bamboo sticks. A few 4ft sticks will do. Snap them in half and tie a length of ribbon to one end. Make the ribbon length no longer than what the kids can handle.

Let the kids loose with the sticks and tell them to try to make shapes, circles, and snakes etc just like the gymnasts do on T.V. My 9 year old who has ADHD absolutely loves this one, and it’s one of the few things he’ll actually do for longer periods of time.

Anna

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Back to school

2006-09-11T06:24:00.000-07:00

Life is so different at this time of year. The kids have finally gone back to school and they're all in a higher year. This brings lots of excitement and sometimes fears and tears too.

Gone is the security of the classroom and teacher they left behind. Now they're older and get even more responsibilities placed on their young shoulders.

Courtney is 6, and not a baby any more. She now has homework and gets to do swimming with the school. She's proud, and lucky. She still has the same classmates and teacher. In her case it's really only the classroom that has changed. She's dealing with it well.

Kelsey on the other hand, isn't too happy with her school right now. As her grades have changed, she's been put into different sets, some higher and some lower than what she was in before. she also has a new classroom, a new teacher and a totally different bunch of classmates to get used to.

She was disappointed and upset the when she came home after the first day. But it's been a week now and she's starting to accept it the way it is. She's getting used to it and is actually finding that it can be good to change, as she's now been asked to sit on the school student council. Mainly due to the fact that she isn't shy about speaking up (which usually got her into trouble last year LOL).

Chris started college today. I guess that means my baby is a big boy now, eh? He's going for some computer courses, NVCU I think it's called. He's really happy because in his last year in school they told him that if he didn't make the grades they set, he wouldn't be able to get into college and he wouldn't get to do anything with computers even if they took pity on him and let him in!

He gave up at school, got totally depressed about it as it was all he's ever wanted to do. so he just gave up and didn't care at all about his GCSE's (which he did actually manage to pass, by the skin of his teeth).

The only reason he managed was because we called into college during the summer holiday to see if there was anything they could do to help. They told him he didn't have to have ANY grades from school and that he was more than welcome to start the NVCU course this September. Boy did the kid change or what! He was really happy again, the way I like him to be.

He came home for lunch today, feeling all grown up and important. Then went back to college with a huge grin on his face. That's like heaven to me :)

Kyle is still at home, being 'educated otherwise' as they like to call it. He's happy with that and probably won't ever want to go back to mainstream school. (Help!)

But yeah, this time of year always brings around a lot of changes for the youngsters. All we can really do is sit back, let them learn and be as supportive as we can. Should they encounter any problems they know they can come to me and I'll try to help them sort it out. They're older now, and need to sort certain things out on their own, but sometimes they do need our help and that's when we have to step up to the plate as good and responsible parents.

Here's to making our kids educational days happy days. Cheers!

Anna

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Blogathon To Help Save Kids Lives

2006-09-07T08:27:00.000-07:00

You will probably have noticed the Spread CHD Awareness over on the right at some point in time. I hope you've at least clicked through to read what it's all about. If it hadn't been for an experiment Dr. Mani was running I wouldn't have started this blog ;)

Anyway, I had a mail today from another intrnet marketing colleague about Dr. Mani and his Blog-A-Thon. I couldn't have written it better, sp oasting it here instead.

"My friend Dr.Mani is a heart surgeon who innovatively uses
online marketing to help kids born with heart defects.

On Saturday Sep.9th, in a very special event called the Heart
Kids Blogathon, he is blogging non-stop for 24 hours to raise
funds for the 'heart kids'.

The fundraiser is off with a bang, with over $3,700 donated
already. Every $2,500 raised means an additional operation
can be funded - so please try and help, in any way you can.

http://www.HeartKidsBlogathon.info

Also, don't forget to drop by and encourage him on the big
day! Make sure you visit his blog on September 9th -
the URL is

http://www.EzineMarketingCenter.com/blog/

Thanks So Much!

Eric Louviere"

I really hope you get the chance to help Dr Mani out with this.
Thanks
Anna

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Kids and Discipline

2006-09-04T05:06:00.000-07:00

Sometimes kids can be total brats and then we have to discipline them. It teaches them respect and compassion for their fellow human beings. It also teaches them that there are consequences to actions.

I don't believe in 'corporal punishment' or hands-on discipline. It's a done thing here in the UK to smack your kids if they're naughty, but I've seen it taken to the exteme too many times to mention.

In Norway, where I spent most of my 'growing up' life, smacking children is against the law. You're not even allowed to tap their hand, so you have to think up other ways of disciplining your children no matter what.

Here at home, we discipline ours by taking things from them. Toys, playstations and freedom are the ones that work best here. Say Kelsey is being a total witch (hey, it happens at her age LOL). She gets grounded. Depending on her actions and attitude the grounding can be anything from a day in the house to a week with no friends being allowed over.

The worst grounding (and it works on all 4 of mine, even the 16 year old) is the grounding where they have to stay with me ALL day. If I go to the kitchen, they come to the kitchen with me, I go to the living room, they sit there with me. The only 'free' space until bedtime is the bathroom LOL.

They absolutely hate it. Even though they love spending time with me, being with me ALL day can drive anybody nuts hehehe.

It's harder for Hugh though, as he's only been with us for a year and of course, the kids are still testing the ground with him. Unfortunately, if he has to tell them off for something, he always feels guilty as hell about it afterwards.

I have to tell him that he's in the right. After all, all he wants is to take care of them and make sure they don't get hurt or anything. That's really the only time he ever tells them off, if they're in danger of hurting themselves or somebody else.

Last night was different. Courtney has been really pushing the limits with him lately, refusing to do as she's asked, but she's been like that with everybody else too. Anyway, he decided to ground her to her room today. She thought I would be on her side, but no chance. If it's going to work, everybody involved has to play by the same rules.

It's hard work at times. She's sitting whining about it, Hugh's in the dining room trying to hide the feelings of guilt and I'm sticking to my guns and agreeeing with his decision. The rest of the kids aren't phased at all, they're just ignoring her LOL.

Chris has his own room as an extention to the house, if he does anything we don't agree with or that he shouldn't be doing, his 'punishment' is sleeping in his old room IN the house. Which ultimately means Kyle and Courtney jumping on him to wake him up at 5.30am. He hates that, and learns fast ;)

Kyle is a different kettle of fish altogether. If you've visited my Kids and ADHD blog you'll know what I mean. Very little discipline has ever worked on him, but the one that does work (if I can handle the tantrums and smashing up of things) is taking away his playstation.

I have to say though, life is getting a lot easier with him since he started on his new medication, and he's actually started responding to small disciplinary actions, such as having to sit on the sofa for 20 minutes. That in itself feels like 3 hours for Kyle, but he's starting to see that there are consequences for certain actions, which is great.

If you have to discipline your kids, please don't hit them, it just teaches them that hitting is ok and they'll go out and hit others at some point in time, even possibly their own kids when that time comes. There are plenty other ways to discipline kids, you just have to find the ones that work for you.

Anna

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Kids and Sleeping Problems part 2

2006-09-02T10:18:00.000-07:00

I never really had a long-lasting sleep problem with any of the other kids. They all had their phases with nightmares, or just not wanting to sleep etc, but nothing like what I went through with Kelsey.

My kids have always been allowed to climb into my bed if they've felt unsafe or couldn't sleep in their own, but at times it does get a bit much.

I found a great way of combatting the chances of it turning into a habit.

I'd let them climb in 2 nights in a row, but the 3rd night I'd pull out my secret weapon: A spare matress placed right beside my bed. If the kids come in on that 3rd night, I send them to get their own quilt and pillow and tell them they can sleep in my room but they HAVE to sleep on the matress on the floor.

Sometimes they do sleep on it, other times they decide it's not worth the hassle and instead of going to get their quilt and pillow they just go back to bed. They've never come back for 4 nights running ;)

Anna

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Kids And Sleeping Problems.

2006-08-31T05:02:00.000-07:00

I think just about every child must go through a phase where they don't sleep properly for one reason or another.

My worst one was Kelsey. Man, she was bad! She so rarely slept properly when she was a baby that the first time she slept for a full 4 hours (at the age of 8 months) I refused to go into her room because I honestly thought she'd be dead! I ran over to get my neighbour, she came and went into Kelseys room and came out laughing at me cos Kelsey was sleeping soundly and sweetly.

With Kelsey, life was a total nightmare. I had Chris and ended up as a single parent by the time Kelsey was born. Chris was then 2 and a half.

Kelsey would NEVER sleep. Well, just about never anyway. She'd feed, then sleep for 20 minutes, then cry for hours and feed and sleep for 20 minutes and cry for hours. Nothing we did helped. Like I mentined, she was 8 months old the first time she even slept for 4 hours straight.

We kept going back and forth to the doctors and got palmed off with 'hysterical mother', 'chest infection', 'virus', 'ear infection' etc etc etc.

Actually, Kelsey was constantly plagued with ear infections and chest infections. I started to notice that when she was sleeping she also tended to snore a LOT and to stop breathing, which constantly woke her up. It was a really scarey time for me, and I had to keep an eye on her all the time when she slept to make sure she DID wake up when her breathing stopped.

This carried on for years, with still no help from the doctors. By the time she was 2 and a half I was totally worn down. She seemed to not be able to hear anything at all, and 'watched' people speak to see what they were saying to her. If someone was behind her and spoke, she had no reaction at all.

Then she started pressing her head/ear up against the speaker on the tv, even though it was already really loud. I decided enough was enough, went back to the doctors and sat there until they gave me a referral to see a specialist.

When we finally got to see the specialist, she pulled out HUGE rock hard clumps of wax from Kelseys ears. Look at the size of the top joint on your little finger. They were THAT size! Needless to say, our 'normal' doctor lost his post as he'd always told us there was nothing wrong and had never found the lumps of wax.

When we got out of the specialists office, Kelsey turned around and looked at me with a great big smile on her face and said 'Mum! I can hear everything!'

It helped a bit, but she was still having sleeping problems. We raised up the head end of the bed, we used breathe easy creams and sprays, we opened windows and everything else we were told to do. She still snored and still stopped breathing, resulting in her waking up.

She couldn't eat anything hard like bread crusts or meat, everything had to be mashed up or in tiny pieces. A year later we had a new appointment to see the specialist. She put us on a waiting list for the hospital to remove Kelseys tonsils and adenoids. It took another year for that appointment to come through. When it finally did, we went to hospital, had the op done, Kelsey woke up and wanted food, and LOTS of it.

She slept through the night for the first time ever at the age of 4 and a half. And again the next night, and the next... In fact, she just stopped waking up through the night at all. Her snoring stopped, her breathing NEVER stopped again and we were in heaven.

To this day Kelsey sleeps a lot, as much as she can in fact, as if she's making up for lost time. She's almost 14 now though, so she should've made up for it by now, eh? LOL.

If your child has sleep problems, don't listen to 'experts' if you have a gut feeling that something is seriously wrong. Keep going and keep pushing. Get a 2nd, 3rd and even 4th opinion if you have to.

I'll cover some of our more 'normal' sleep problems next time.

Anna

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Kids will be kids

2006-08-29T14:22:00.000-07:00

I sometimes write up things that the kids have done, and recently found this. I wrote it about 3 years ago, maybe a little more (Courtney is almost 6 now), yet re-reading it still made me giggle.

I think my 6 year old has decided to become a politician when he`s older. Here's a little story from last Thursday:

I woke up, after an hours sleep, at 6am. Opened my eyes to see a bright red 2 year old. She'd managed to get hold of a thick waterproof marker pen, and was covered from top to toe in scribbles.

After rubbing my eyes, I looked closer, and saw the name KYLE (my 6 year old) written across her tummy. So as a good mother, I did my bit of ranting and raving, and asked Kyle why he was writing his name on her tummy. He looked at me with beautifully innocent eyes (as I was walking into the other bedroom) and said 'Wow mum! I didn't know she was THAT clever!'

Trying my hardest not to giggle, I was suddenly faced with bright red marker on the bedroom walls, some of it low down (where a 2 year old can reach) and some a bit higher (where a 2 year old can't reach). Up on the high bit, what do I see? The name KYLE in great big letters.

Immediately, Kyle looks at me and says 'Oh MY! One of the other kids musta written that, and Courtney`s copied it to her tummy!! She really IS good mum!'

Needless to say, the 2 older kids (10 and 13) were fast asleep in their beds and didn`t have a clue as to what was going on...lol

Anna

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Tips for Keeping Children Safe Online

2006-08-20T06:16:00.000-07:00

Tips for Keeping Children Safe Online
By Sharon Housley

There was once a time when you only had to worry about children when they were outside or not at home. Those times have changed. Strangers can now enter your home, without a key or coming through a door. How you may ask? These strangers enter your home using a keyboard. These strangers can befriend your children online.

Social networking has become increasingly popular and websites like Myspace have thrived with adolescents and teens. While pedophiles may be the minority on these sites, the threat of having a pedophile enter your home, under the guise of being someone their not, is just too big of a threat to ignore.

It may seem harmless enough, at first glance. I mean, what do other web surfers really know about your child? They might even live half a world away. How could they possibly harm your child? Perhaps you might even see the educational value of your child interacting with individuals from other cultures and understanding the global nature of today's world, but consider this...

Children online don't feel that these "friends" are strangers. They "chat" with them daily. These people, who parents consider strangers, are their friends. They understand what the child is going through and they listen in ways the parents never seem to. The recent riveting testimony of a young boy that was drawn into online pornography at the age of 13, should be a wake up call to all parents. Computers and the Internet can be far more dangerous than most parents ever imagine. The likelihood of a child online will encounter strangers is far higher than a stranger wandering into their backyard.

Parents warn their children about strangers as they grow up, perhaps its time to redefine the term stranger. Consider the following to protect your child, adolescent, or teenager while online.

1. Webcams.
Do not allow your children to use a webcam unsupervised. Children will often forget that the webcams are there or even worse, what may seem harmless online flirting might result in unwarranted or undesired attention from an anonymous predator. Additionally, webcams have been tied to home robberies where burglars viewed items of interest through a webcam. A little online digging resulted in the home address, and items were then stolen.

2. Common Area.
In spite of an adolescents or a teenagers need for privacy, it is best to keep the computer in a family common area. It might be helpful to explain to your child why it is important that computers be out in the open. Children should understand that using a computer is not a right, is a privilege. Parents can and should supervise online activity.

3. Personal Information.
Personal information is just that, personal, and should not be shared by children. As easy as that is to say, sometimes children are often confused as to what constitutes personal information. Educating children about what personal information is, is just as important as educating them as telling them not to share. Children need to understand that just because someone asks for personal information doesn't mean you have to tell them.

What is personal information? Knowing not to share your location, name, age, address, phone number, town, password, and schedule might seem obvious to children, but what many don't realize is that predators will often piece together various bits of information. A predator will aggregate data to determine a child's location or true identity. Predators are able to use IP tracking and the location of an online web provider that you use might assist them in narrowing down a location. Information related to sports events or scheduled concerts will further allow a predator to ascertain a child's location and personal information.

Provide adolescents and teenagers these tips in determining what information is appropriate or inappropriate to share. Tell them to ask themselves how the predator can use the requested information? Is it necessary for them to have that information? Why?

4. Crossing the Bounds.
It is easy to explain to a child that a stranger is someone they don't know in the real world, but online the definition becomes blurred. Is a friend of a friend online, a stranger? If you have communicated X number of times with someone, are they still a stranger? Assist your children in drawing lines about who is appropriate to communicate with, and who is not.

5. Candor.
When talking to children about surfing online, it is important to be honest with them. Children have to understand the dangers, but should not live in fear. Balancing candor and fear might be tricky, but you know your child best and keeping it real will help them navigate and how to stay safe online.

6. Trust.
Trust online is a funny thing, just because someone says something is true does not mean that it is. Bloggers and online wikis are dealing with credibility issues, yet individuals are often trusted until proven untrustworthy.

7. Identifying Information.
Instruct your child NEVER to share any identifying information that includes phone numbers and addresses. And finally ,consider how non-anonymous the web really is http://www.small-business-software.net/anonymity-of-internet.htm .

8. Photos.
Children should not swap photos online. Exchanging photos is unnecessary and puts children at a higher level of risk. Additionally digital photographs can easily be edited by a third party. An explicit online photo can haunt a child for a lifetime.

9. Profiles.
Children should not complete profiles in blogging software or social networks, like MySpace The profiles or hobbies can often raise the interest of unwanted admirers.

10. Questionnaires/ Surveys.
Children should not complete questionnaires or surveys online. The information requested may appear harmless, but you do not know how the information will be used, it is good practice to avoid completing any questionnaires or surveys.

11. Meeting.
It of course goes without saying that children should not meet any individual that they converse with online.

12. Chat Rooms.
Chat rooms are playgrounds for sexual predators. The chat room owners have no method to detect a lurking predator from a child. As a result it is just a good practice to restrict access to chat rooms.

13. Instant Messaging.
Adolescents and teenagers often want to communicate, whether on the phone or via the Internet. Instant messaging is a popular phenomenon for children. If you allow your child to communicate using instant messaging, be sure to block instant messaging from anyone unknown. Additionally, spot check their buddy list to make sure that it has not been altered. Use a tool like AOL where restrictions can be implemented.

14. Online Games.
Often online games, will contain a chat component. The same rules that apply to instant messaging should apply to the online games and chatting. Rarely are filters available for the online games and many children will encounter strangers who evolve into friends through online play. Be leery and weary.

The Internet is global and not governed by any single entity. There are no limitations. By creating clear boundaries for your children they will be able to take advantage of this amazing vehicle without putting themselves at risk.

About the Author:
Sharon Housley manages marketing for FeedForAll http://www.feedforall.com software for creating, editing, publishing RSS feeds and podcasts. In addition Sharon manages marketing for NotePage http://www.notepage.net a wireless text messaging software company.

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Breastfeeding: Yes or No? My Experiences.

2006-08-19T02:54:00.000-07:00

As this is a blog about parenting I thought I should probably start from the beginning (after the pregnancy itself), and go on to the feeding of our kids.

Breastfeeding: Yes or No? My Experiences.
By Anna-Marie Stewart

I breastfed all 4 of my kids by choice. I lived in Norway when the 3 eldest were born and it was the 'done thing'. If anybody bottle-fed their baby they got weird looks. When I first fell pregnant at the age of 20 or so, I would never have dreamed of breastfeeding, and throughout the pregnancy I swore I'd never do it. It was something ingrained from my first 12 years of life being in England. When they brought Chris to me, he automatically latched on and that was it, no turning back.

I breastfed him quite a long time, until Kelsey came along anyway, then I went directly to breastfeeding her. I had a couple years freedom from breastfeeding then Kyle came along, and it was only natural that I breastfed him too.

Courtney was born here in the UK, and people were really freaking out about me breastfeeding her. It was like we had to hide away whenever she needed feeding. The funniest thing ever was the health visitor though. She decided she was going to teach me how to breastfeed properly! I explained, as nicely as I could, that I'd already breastfed 3 kids and knew what I was doing, then asked her how many SHE had breastfed. Her reply? 'Oh, I haven't had children yet'!!! Needless to say, I requested a new health visitor there and then LOL.

I was lucky, I never really had a problem breastfeeding any of the kids. Apart from once. I got mastitis, an inflammation and infection in one of my breasts. It was my own fault. After I had Chris (the eldest) I'd been told not to get my hands cold as it would most likely lead to mastitis, then I went hunting in the deep-freezer for some meat for dinner. Kaboom! Next day I was in agony! It lasted a couple of weeks, had to have antibiotics and still breastfeed, and I was close to giving up the whole idea for a while cos it was SO painful. But I stuck with it, the infection went away and I ended up breastfeeding the other 3 without any problems at all.

You can safely say I learnt my lesson! If you're reading this and thinking of breastfeeding all I can say is Go For It. It's the most healthy thing you can do for your baby and it creates a fantastic bond between you and the baby. Just make sure you don't get your hands too cold ;)

===============Resource Box===========
Discover how a mom with four unruly kids avoided
a breakdown with this surprise discovery! 12-page
guide reveals 32 ways to keep your kids occupied,
happy and focused. It’s a parent’s dream come true!
http://annamarketing.com/FTS/32Ways.htm
-------------------------------------------------

This article is available for reprint in your opt-in ezine, web site or ebook. You MUST agree not to make any changes to the article and the RESOURCE BOX MUST be included. (c) 2006 Anna-Marie Stewart. All Rights Reserved

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Recommended for kids and parents too

2006-08-18T02:16:00.000-07:00

Was just sitting here wondering what to write about and one of the kids asked if they could go on one of their fave game sites on the other pc. That made me decide what to write about LOL

If your kids like games (or you do) then check out Neopets at http://www.neopets.com

It's an interactive site, with lots of stuff going on. You create a 'pet' that you can feed, play with, battle with etc. There are multiple games and lots of ways to earn money (neopoints) that you can use to equip or feed and clothe your pet. You can create a neohome, barter for stuff on the trading post, make your pet advance in levels through reading etc. It's really fun and the kids are learning without realizing ;)

Anna

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Help Your Kids To Read Better!

2006-08-12T12:05:00.000-07:00

Help Your Kids To Read Better!
By Anna-Marie Stewart

One of my blog visitors asked me to write a bit about how I got Kyle to read after she'd read some posts about him and his ADHD so I thought, yeah, why not?

Basically, what I did was really easy. I forced Kyle to read without him even knowing it. I started off with simple stuff, like road signs. They're big and bright and attention grabbing, and most have pictures to go along with the words. Everywhere we went, I'd point out a road sign and ask him to tell me what it meant. It worked, and it wasn't long before he started reading ALL road signs, with our without pictures and feeling really proud of himself for being able to do it.

We have a gazillion books at home, and I've always read to my kids, but with Kyle I started to 'cheat'. I'd leave out exciting bits, or just read a few words from each page and make the story REALLY short. I started doing that with books and stories he was already familiar with so that he'd KNOW I was leaving stuff out, and he'd call me on it. I'd say, well how do you KNOW what's missing. I can read, can you? He actually took on the challenge.

He started sneaking books up to his room. (I say sneaking, but in reality he just THOUGHT he was sneaking them and I let him think that). Now to me, it was brilliant, he'd NEVER shown an interest in books before, so I took it as a good sign and didn't mention it to him.

Another thing I did was whenever he wanted to watch tv I would make him hit the info button before watching a program to bring the synopsis up, and I'd read it out to him. When I wasn't around, he'd sit flicking through the channels and looking at the synpsis for each program to see which words he recognized. It was a good habit to get into as he now NEVER watches a program without reading what it's about first.

We also get reading in another way whenever we're out, and that's by using cars. Yep, cars. We read the license plates to see if we can make up words from the letters on them. Try it, it can be quite amusing ;)

One of the MAIN things in getting him to read was, of course, sweets! With his ADHD there are a LOT of things we try to keep out of his way, such as e colours and additives. My kids only get sweets on Saturdays and a very limited amout too. As the others are in school I started taking Kyle with me on the Friday to buy the sweets ready for the Saturday. I gave him the choice of ANY sweets he wanted so long as they had no e colours or additives.

It worked! He now looks at every sweet packet and even every food packet to see if it's something he's allowed to have or not.

Kyle also loves the pc and for a while we had 2 pc's right next to each other. He'd play his games and I'd work on my ezine and ebooks. Every time he needed help he would ask. Of course, I was working, so sometimes he'd have to wait for an answer. He got impatient and tried to read for himself. I'd tell him to say it out loud and if he read something wrong I'd help him to see what it actually said and it just took off from there.

All the while, more and more books have been disappearing from the living room.

It's VERY rare he ever asks for help with his reading now, and frequently comes running from his room to read to me about tarantulas, bugs, sharks and anything else he's found interesting.

I hope this helps some of you out there.

===============Resource Box===========
Discover how a mom with four unruly kids avoided
a breakdown with this surprise discovery! 12-page
guide reveals 32 ways to keep your kids occupied,
happy and focused. It’s a parent’s dream come true!
http://annamarketing.com/FTS/32Ways.htm
-------------------------------------------------

This article is available for reprint in your opt-in ezine, web site or ebook. You MUST agree not to make any changes to the article and the RESOURCE BOX MUST be included. (c) 2006 Anna-Marie Stewart. All Rights Reserved

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Just a little intro

2006-08-11T14:17:00.000-07:00

When I first started this blog is was going to be an experiment, but then the kids went on holiday to France for 3 weeks and I ended up getting REALLY busy with creating my newest ebook Real Life Marketer Interviews Vol. II

So if you're visiting through Dr Mani's Blog Challenge, then forgive me for not following through. It just got way too hectic over here for me to pay the challenge the time and attention it deserved. Now, if you're NOT involved in the blog challenge, but would like to help kids with heart defects, then scoot over to the CHD logo over on the right there -------------->

See it? You might have to scroll to find it, but it's well worth it just for the sake of helping kids.

Anyhow, I should possibly give a brief intro of who I am and what I do, eh? Or, you could just go look at my profile ;)

Yeah, do that, it's probably easier than listening to me rambling on. Hey, waddya expect? The kids have been in France for almost 3 weeks now, I have nobody apart from my fiance to talk to so OF COURSE I'm going to ramble.. LOL.

So anyway, check me out, look at my profile, visit my other blogs and websites, get a feel for who I am and come and say Hi! In the meantime I'll try to think up some really 'cool' parenting stuff for my next post.

Laters
Anna

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It's a networking experiment

2006-07-26T13:44:00.000-07:00

Here are a couple of other blogs that you may find interesting. Please visit them if you can as we're experimenting networking via blogs ;)

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Life with ADHD: Routines Help Us To Cope Better

2006-07-25T08:41:00.000-07:00

Life with ADHD: Routines Help Us To Cope Better
By Anna-Marie Stewart

Just sitting here and thinking over the things I've learned from dealing with ADHD on a daily basis. One of the most important lessons was all about routines. Now if you have any ADHD experience at all you will know that routines can help immensely, but you will also know that the person needing the routines absolutely hates rules! Doesn't exactly make it easier huh? For us, with Kyle being home-educated, it seems to be easier to handle routines than when he was in mainstream education.

At school there were always rigid rules to follow along with the routines, which didn't bode well for Kyle, who is now 9 years old. In fact he totally hated it and played up constantly which is one of the main reasons we took him out of mainstream school. We try not to make too many strict rules at home, but instead concentrate on sticking with the routines. It has definitely helped us lots.

Looking back on the 2 years (or is it 3? I've lost count!) of educating him at home I can see that he has been having much more fun than he ever did before. Ok, so he still doesn't write, but I'm sure he could if he wanted to. He can write on the pc if he has to, but there's no way on earth he'll even contemplate holding a pen.

When he left school he was a year behind his classmates in reading, yet now he reads at least as well as his 16 year old brother, and almost as well as myself! He's now started learning French. His nan moved to France this year and he's already been there a couple of times with her, both before she moved and for the Easter holidays after she had moved.

One of our routines includes the games console. He gets x amount of time on it, depending on which day it is. The rule there is he now has to play the games using the French language and/or the French subtitle options. It's working too. I know because he keeps speaking to me with French comments and accents hahahaha.

Another of our routines includes TV. He gets to watch tv for x amount of time, depending on days again, but the rule is that half of that time has to be spent on educational programs.

We do exactly the same with the pc. However much time he spends on it is divided between playing games and learning. What he doesn't realize is that most of his time on the pc is actually about him learning as he has to search for sites himself when he wants to play games, and most of the games he plays have some element of education in them.

So there you have it, just some of our routines: games consoles, tv and pc. All working together they make sure he has fun and gets educated in various ways. Of course, the home education consists of tons more than just that, but they are the things we start our day with (not neccessarily in that order) as soon as breakfast is over and the others are in school.

===============Resource Box===========
Discover how a mom with four unruly kids avoided
a breakdown with this surprise discovery! 12-page
guide reveals 32 ways to keep your kids occupied,
happy and focused. It’s a parent’s dream come true!
http://annamarketing.com/FTS/32Ways.htm
-------------------------------------------------

This article is available for reprint in your opt-in ezine, web site or ebook. You MUST agree not to make any changes to the article and the RESOURCE BOX MUST be included. (c) 2006 AnnaMarketing.com. All Rights Reserved

Technorati Tags:
parenting, parenting advice, parenting tips, single parenting, parenting resources

My Real Life Parenting Blog

2006-07-23T07:16:00.000-07:00

This is my newest blog all about real life parenting. I have 4 kids aged between 5 and 16 so I reckon I must know some stuff by now. Not entirely sure exactly what I'll be posting here as of yet, but stay tuned and I'm sure we'll figure it out.

Anna