I laugh inwardly even thinking of the two deer standing up on their hind legs, one with a bull’s-eye on his chest as the other exclaims, “Bummer of a birthmark, Hal.”

This week I had two clients tell me that they receive more than 300 e-mails every day. I didn’t bother canvassing the rest of my clients and about their quantity because I didn’t have to. It is over the top.

E-mail, while amazingly easy and efficient, has become the source of the single greatest frustration for too many people. There are now books and courses being taught on how to handle your e-mail.

While I am convinced that there are some wonderful processes and systems to help navigate through this, the one that I will share with you today is this: You simply don’t need to read them all.

Too often we get in the habit of thinking that we had better read it all for fear that we could be missing something important. There are indeed some important things coming through e-mail… along with a truckload of things that are not. Distinguishing between which are and which are not important could be the difference between you living stressed or not.

Your action plan is to have the courage to make the determination, and then live at peace with your decision.

Back to The Far Side.

I can only dream about having a mind such as Gary Larson’s. But it did strike me as somewhat FarSide-ish that many of you who subscribe to this blog receive it over e-mail. Get it?

If Reality and Hope helps you – if you like reading it and it does something for you – by all means keep reading it and know that I am grateful. If not, please unsubscribe and give yourself the gift of one less e-mail.

I want to have an abundant mindset that cares enough about you to give you permission to lighten your load, even a little. If I keep sending you e-mails that weigh you down, then we are both living in a Far Side cartoon. Which, for the record, would be fun, if not so real.

Release yourself from the things that give you unnecessary burdens.

Peace,

Coach Steve

I must say that I am often skeptical of such advice, partly because “success” never seems to be defined the same way by any two individuals. For many people, success is some number, some amount of money. For others it is some level of achievement or stature or title. For still others it is a feeling of peace, or a belief that you are helping people.

However you define it, one key element has got to be consistency.

Most often you will not find success in some big magnanimous moment, but rather as a result of being consistent in your actions. It comes slowly as you learn not be swayed by your emotions or other events happening around you. Thus, success is so often described in terms of some form of winning a battle.

We encounter many metaphors about battles and fights because the glory of winning may come at the end of such warfare. But the real day-to-day battle we must fight is the battle to be consistent. To get up every day and do the little things we have committed to, whether we want to do them or not.

The truth is that if we were to depict the real fight to become successful, it would be rather boring. You might not be interested in watching a movie about a guy who gets up every morning and does 30 minutes of cardio, or a woman who makes 5 proactive outbound calls by 10am. But winning those daily, boring battle to remain consistent is to win something great indeed.

If you wish to achieve your own definition of success, you must do what you should do – over and over and over.

Cheers to your journey,

Coach Steve

Now, if your reality is that the year has kicked off with a bang and things look like smooth sailing ahead, please don’t discard this post. Life has a way of throwing storms at us, and knowing how to navigate in and out of them is crucial to our ability to live as fruitfully as we can.

Following on the “storm” and “navigation” metaphor, today I thought I would offer a suggestion that deals with anchors.

Perhaps another day I will write about pulling up the anchor and getting your proverbial boat out to sea. But these days, I have seen too many people whose boats are in a storm, and they need to find a place to set their anchor down.

I believe that many today will be able to identify with a boat out at sea in a tempest – that’s how life can feel. I wonder what relief it is to the seaman who is in such a storm to find safe harbor and drop anchor? We all need to have an anchor if we are to get out of the storm and find some much-needed peace in the bay.

Have you ever had “one of those days” (or weeks or years) where it seemed like everything went astray, and you found peace by reminding yourself what really matters? That reminder is what I mean by an anchor.

For some of you, your anchors are specific people in your life that will care for you irrespective of the storm. For others, it is a personal relationship with God. I even find that there are specific sayings and quotes that act as mantras for me that keep me anchored. “I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord…” This is an anchor verse in ancient scripture.

There is much hope and peace in anchors. But sometimes in the midst of storms, we forget we have them. Please remember what or who your anchors are, for even if the waters are calm today, your boat will be in a storm one day. Perhaps today you need to be the anchor for someone else.

May the winds blow your way….but if they happen to be blowing fast and furiously, may you find the life-giving refuge of being anchored.

Peace.

Coach Steve

Some people have the type of vocation that calls upon them to start over every month. Others have to go back to the beginning annually. Still others will have a circumstance in life (because life seems to be full of circumstances) that forces them to begin things yet again.

Even though what we had done in the past caused us to enjoy some level of success, going back to the beginning isn’t often met with enthusiasm and excitement. It is just as often the case that we are anxious, fearful, or even resentful. Sure, there are times when a new beginning is fun and exciting, but do it enough and you will join the ranks of those who meet these cycles with clenched teeth.

This is precisely why Dale Carnegie noted that “success in business, as in life, consists not only in the ability to persevere, but in the humble willingness to start over.” (Italics are mine.)

When we read Dale’s quote it seems so nice, so logical, and so easy. Yet I have seen many stumble in their unwillingness to simply embrace newness. Is it perhaps because we fear the unknown? Is it that we think our past efforts are rendered superfluous? Does our anxiety flare over whether or not we will be able to sustain another success?

Whatever the reason may be, I find that there are seasons in which we embrace a new start…and seasons that we abhor it. Either way, going back to the beginning seems to be an inevitability. And this won’t happen just once to you. It will happen over and over.

Perhaps your new start is with a new individual or group in your life. Perhaps it is with a new job. It is quite possible that your new start is really an old one that you already tried to start multiple times – those ones can be most problematic!

Today, I wish to encourage you. If you find yourself having to begin a fresh start, define it, accept it, embrace it, and go for it. It will not be the last time you have to do go back to the beginning, but we may all choose to start a new trend – the trend of accepting new trends.

It seems as though true success is no destination at all, but rather a long road filled with lots of starting lines.

Cheers to a great week ahead.

Coach Steve

I have written before about how many books have the word “millionaire” in the title. It is laughable. There are many things that define the culture in which we live, but one is certainly our endless pursuit of wealth and our avoidance of anything that causes us to have less money and resources than we’d like.

Ask anyone on the street if they know the number one reason given for marital strife, and without even knowing the statistics they could tell you it is financial problems. One of the greatest institutions known to mankind is marriage, and the number one thing working against it is problems with money. How amazing is that?

I trust that there will be many opinions about this, and what I ask is that you would listen to what your own internal voice is saying about how you consider money and the pursuit of having more .

My recommendation for this is so over-simplified it may cause you to dismiss it, but here goes: go ahead and pursue money and wealth. But if you get it, remember to hold on to it with an open hand. If you clutch it too tightly, it will grip you back – and too often its grip on us is much stronger.

May we be blessed, but may our blessings be held with our hands open. May we care for our things with diligence, but always remember that they are not what make us who we are.

Keep those hands open.

Coach Steve

So many of my clients and friends start each January with the idea that the year ahead will be great if only they can remain disciplined in what they know they should be doing.

We live in a weird world, and it is arguably getting weirder. The world tells us we must do everything to avoid pain, and yet discipline itself is an acceptance of some type of pain. We avoid accountability, we avoid reality, and we even avoid the truth if it is going to cause us pain. Then, once a year, we recommit ourselves to the concept of discipline. But few people see it through, because the truth is that discipline means more pain than our avoid-pain-at-all-costs culture will allow.

I believe that this year can truly be a great one, but if that greatness is tied to discipline then pain and discomfort must be embraced at the same time. If we are not willing to subject ourselves to the discomfort of a disciplined life, then by default we are accepting mediocrity – or worse.

One of the single greatest God-given abilities of our lives is our internal drive to make tomorrow better than today. I believe that we should all look forward to a great year ahead. I think it is fine to make plans and have hopes and aspirations for great things to come. But from everything I have ever seen or heard in the coaches’ chair, the “great things” most often come as a result of normal people doing things that make them uncomfortable.

Emotional, spiritual, physical, and even vocational health is most often the result of men and women who choose not to put off what they know they should do. They do it.

We all wish each other a happy and prosperous new year. I wish for you a year of pain and discomfort. The kind that prunes you, sharpens you, and makes you better.

Coach Steve