Really Slow News Day

Rapture by Proxy

2011-05-24T15:44:00.000-07:00

Send $20 for a full size blow-up doll, or $10 for a mini-sized blow-up doll, along with your name, or the name of the party you would like to see Raptured by Proxy [TM], to Michael Dare, 2405 NE 113th St., #3, Seattle, WA 98125.

On October 21, 2011, I will write your name on the doll with a Sharpie, fill it with helium, and live blog the release of all the dolls into the Seattle sky, whatever the weather.

Don't let the next Rapture catch you with your pants down, and don't accept any other offers for Raptures by Proxy. This is the only one with a personal guarantee that you will fly into the clouds.

Like Napster, it's only great if it's popular and it's only popular if it's great.

2009-12-04T10:51:00.001-08:00

I am to presume that what I am writing will be available to anyone else who visits this or any page, turning the entire World Wide Web into a public library where everyone is encouraged to talk about whatever it is they're viewing, including this very page, while entirely bypassing whatever "comment" section the original page may have set up, indeed, giving us the ability to make comments about comments ad infinitum. Resting in the post-coital glow of having been directed to a satisfactory site by Google in the first place, we are invited to share a cigarette with other surfers lusting to share their experience. Way to go, Google, I can hardly wait.

in reference to: Google Sidewiki (view on Google Sidewiki)

Good work if you can get it

2009-07-21T10:52:00.001-07:00

http://www.just-whatever.com/

I can't believe it's not Michael Jackson

2009-07-18T11:25:00.001-07:00

Vote Nixes Butter Michael Jackson

Michael Jackson in 1984 (Associated Press)

The Iowa State Fair says a butter sculpture of the King of Pop will not be made for the 2009 fair. After the death of Michael Jackson, officials with the fair announced a sculpture would be made to honor him.

Many people protested that decision and the Iowa State Fair decided to put it to an online vote. The results were clear. Just over 65-percent of voters said they did not want a butter sculpture of Michael Jackson. Around 35-percent said yes. Fair officials say more than 100,000 votes were cast on their website. The results of a WHOtv.com poll were similar, with 70-percent of voters saying no to a Jackson sculpture and 30-percent saying yes.

http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/nationworld/who-story-butter-jackson-071709,0,6114673.story

House raped by Wienermobile

2009-07-18T10:14:00.001-07:00

MOUNT PLEASANT, Wis. (AP) --

One southern Wisconsin homeowner is probably not in love with the Oscar Mayer wiener. The famed hot dog's Wienermobile crashed Friday into the deck and garage of a home in Mount Pleasant, about 35 miles south of Milwaukee.

Police said the driver was trying to turn the Wienermobile around in the driveway and thought she was moving in reverse. But she instead went forward and hit the home. It sat in the driveway as if it were stuck in the garage Friday afternoon.

No one was home and no one was injured. No citations were immediately issued.