Forces Wives, Partners, Friends and Family Forum http://www.rearparty.co.uk/ Armed Forces Familes, Wives, Partners, Parents and Friends Community Forum en Mon, 20 May 2013 16:40:53 GMT vBulletin 60 http://www.rearparty.co.uk/images/misc/rss.png Forces Wives, Partners, Friends and Family Forum http://www.rearparty.co.uk/ Partner Joining the Navy http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/RearParty/~3/K-RJK6lBg0c/10663-partner-joining-navy.html Mon, 20 May 2013 12:01:14 GMT Good Afternoon, Am a brand new member and joined as i have been reading previous posts on your forum from what seem to be some amazing ladies... Good Afternoon,

Am a brand new member and joined as i have been reading previous posts on your forum from what seem to be some amazing ladies offering some great advice. I myself need some advice and would love any advice anyone could offer me.

After getting out of a very bad 6 year relationship i decided to stay single for a while and enjoy myself and put myself first, selfishly for the first time in my life.

However the best laid plans don't always come off, as such through work i was introduced to a guy who i hit it off with and for a while we just exchanged funny emails and hept each other amused during the working day. After a while he asked if i wanted to go out for a night out, one thing led to another and nearly a year later we are very happy and still can't believe we are together. Me on the basis of wanting some alone time and him as he had been hurt before and was quite content staying single as well.

He told me when we first got together he told me he had applied for the Navy and hadn't had all his tests yet. I didnt think much of this at the time as i had no idea if we were going somewhere or not. As time has gone on he has now completed and passed all his tests and as such has been accepted for the Navy which he is extatic about and i want to support him as best i can. He has now been given his dates for his 3 day training and his join date March 2014 and while this seems like a million days away i know it will get round quicker than i want it to.

We had a very upsetting emotional chat yesterday and it is now playing on my mind alot, so much so i am now on here trying to voice my rants and raves as best i can. He is upset that i will be "putting my life on hold" while he is away and doesn't want to hurt me by leaving me and me having to live without him for months at a time.

I am very scared of this being a newer relationship and us not being able to cope with the seperation, he himself said that he is finding it harder to get anymore attached to me knowing he is leaving me next year. He doesn't want to break up with me and me the same with him but neither does he want to hurt me by continuing our relationship and me suffering as a result of it.

I am prepared to try and see what and whether we are able to cope with the seperation as the prospect of loosing him is physically painful. But am just so confused with my emotions now after our chat that i needed to ask someone who has been in this situation or knows what it is like to have a partner in the armed forces and being seperated for so long........... :(

Any help you can be would be very much appreciated, i also apologise for going on and on and thank you for taking the time to read my verbal diorrea....... xxx
]]> Partners - Wives, Girlfriends, Boyfriends, Husbands Amy-Lou http://www.rearparty.co.uk/partners-wives-girlfriends-boyfriends-husbands/10663-partner-joining-navy.html http://www.rearparty.co.uk/partners-wives-girlfriends-boyfriends-husbands/10663-partner-joining-navy.html Wardroom wobbles http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/RearParty/~3/sHganhPsG_U/10662-wardroom-wobbles.html Mon, 20 May 2013 07:40:29 GMT Is it just me or does anyone else manage to somehow end up feeling like they've made a complete nincompoop of themselves when staying in a wardroom with your OH.

I'm going down midweek this week which is as rare as hens teeth and will make the week really short- I know I'm lucky and a right jammy sod compared to those with partners deployed out in the sandpit etc.

However- does anyone have any minor discrepancies they may of made? Or is it just me who manages to make things go crash and run into the male loos.

Happy Monday xx
]]> Partners - Wives, Girlfriends, Boyfriends, Husbands More_gin_vicar? http://www.rearparty.co.uk/partners-wives-girlfriends-boyfriends-husbands/10662-wardroom-wobbles.html http://www.rearparty.co.uk/partners-wives-girlfriends-boyfriends-husbands/10662-wardroom-wobbles.html New, need some support and a large glass of red ... http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/RearParty/~3/bk2L0Cly-R0/10661-new-need-some-support-large-glass-red.html Sat, 18 May 2013 23:14:25 GMT Hi everyone,

My partner is currently based in Germany (while I live in uk with parents), we're not married but very much besotted with each other, he's being deployed in sept on his first tour, is due back for summer leave in a couple of months and I feel like I need some support from the wives and girlfriends community .... Hi! :)

I have never had to deal with a partner being away before and I'm finding it difficult him living away now, anyone any advice on coping? Thinking of beginning a blog as I'm a keen writer and obsessed with social networking!

I understand I have to open a bar as a newbie so I'm having a LARGE glass of red, what's everyone else having?
]]> Welcome Miss_red http://www.rearparty.co.uk/welcome/10661-new-need-some-support-large-glass-red.html http://www.rearparty.co.uk/welcome/10661-new-need-some-support-large-glass-red.html Book competition - The Manner of Men http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/RearParty/~3/-ztSvzzDXLQ/10660-book-competition-manner-men.html Fri, 17 May 2013 15:05:38 GMT Colonel Stuart Tootal has written this book about the life of 9 PARA. It is a warts 'n all account of the battalion, how it trained and what actions it took part in. Joker62 went along to listen to a talk given by Col Tootal and his account of that can be found here.

There are 5 copies to be won and to get your hands on one just complete the entry form correctly and you are in with a chance. Entry form can be found here.


Competition runs until Sunday 26th May at about midday.
]]> Competitions Auld_Yin http://www.rearparty.co.uk/competitions/10660-book-competition-manner-men.html http://www.rearparty.co.uk/competitions/10660-book-competition-manner-men.html <![CDATA[Feeling like you're back at the beginning- in a good way?]]> http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/RearParty/~3/3Qtv2dF52mk/10659-feeling-like-youre-back-beginning-good-way.html Fri, 17 May 2013 13:54:31 GMT Have zero cause to complain in terms of lengthily separation. However, am waiting anxiously to see OH after a few weeks of cold empty bed and loo... Have zero cause to complain in terms of lengthily separation. However, am waiting anxiously to see OH after a few weeks of cold empty bed and loo seat always being as it should be etc.

Is it normal in the last few hours to get that sickly butterflies feeling and be all tied up in knots?

Its only 5 hours and I'll be with him- yet all I can do is fidget and get all day-dreamy- to which my boss' response is WTF get on with that Bible order. Hehe I'm sooo excited!

Now, composure and...... back to that bible
]]> Partners - Wives, Girlfriends, Boyfriends, Husbands More_gin_vicar? http://www.rearparty.co.uk/partners-wives-girlfriends-boyfriends-husbands/10659-feeling-like-youre-back-beginning-good-way.html http://www.rearparty.co.uk/partners-wives-girlfriends-boyfriends-husbands/10659-feeling-like-youre-back-beginning-good-way.html Disaster! http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/RearParty/~3/xOc-F8_MIqE/10655-disaster.html Thu, 16 May 2013 20:51:22 GMT Just twatted my face on a low hanging branch (which I have never noticed before) taking the rubbish out in the dark. I've got a gash on the bridge of my nose which has just stopped bleeding. I get married in 7 days. Wt actual F? What if I get black eyes?! Please anyone with any advice as how to minimise the damage? I can't believe it. I've been religiously cleansing toning moisturizing to prevent spots, i've been applying a thin layer of cold sore cream daily even though I haven't had a tingle (you never know when one of those dirty bad boys are going to show up) and I go and do this. I think i'm going to cry now. A lot.

What does arnica do? Does it minimise bruising?
]]> The Lounge siany http://www.rearparty.co.uk/lounge/10655-disaster.html http://www.rearparty.co.uk/lounge/10655-disaster.html Always pencil, never pen :( http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/RearParty/~3/tPkgmsWu5TY/10654-always-pencil-never-pen.html Thu, 16 May 2013 18:50:11 GMT I thought about posting this in the moan thread, but its a bit more than a run of the mill moan and i'm a bit of a mess so I thought perhaps a swift kick in the bum, and/or some virtual support would be appreciated.

Anyways, as you may know its been an absolute nightmare trying to sort out when the Mr. is actually going to be home. He was meant to be home earlier this month... thats been and gone. Then we got another date... and we got all the way into the single digits countdown before that changed again. We got a third date, and made it past the one week countdown... I went to get a coffee this afternoon ( first time in 6 months I haven't taken my mobile with me) and came back to a message. Yup! Pushed back again. Some forward thinking bureaucrat took it upon themselves to cancel his flight because they weren't sure if the replacement would show up. The replacement showed up, but now the Mr has been bumped off his scheduled flight and now they are saying he won't be a on a new flight out of the Sandpit (let alone cyprus!) until a couple of days after he was meant to be home!

My nerves are shot. I'm not sleeping properly, and I can't bring myself to eat more than a few bites at a time because my stomach is stuck in a giant knot. I don't know how to cope with this anymore. I did the unthinkable and cried at work when I found out, which has been a huge no-no this entire time he's been away for obvious professional reasons, but I just can't seem deal with it this time. All the other times i've grumbled, bitched and got back up and kept going... but tonight its just a flood of tears and this horrible kicked in the stomach feeling.

I was already having a bitch of a time with trying to deal with him coming home. Just nerves and fussing, wondering how we would adjust to being together again... all the normal sorts of homecoming nerves. Adding to that I was starting to relax and sort of let some of those old emotions that i've been keeping on lock down for sanities sake creep in again. It's pathetic and I should know better, but I was so looking forward to not having to constantly be strong and just keep being there for him. I feel completely and utterly burnt out, like I have nothing left to offer in terms of emotional support for him, yet he needs it more than ever right now as he is going absolutely insane and just wants to be home. I managed to keep it together long enough to talk to him, give him the whole " its only a few more days, we can still do all these wonderful fun things, this is what I have planned for us' speech and got him laughing... but now he is gone again and I just a big, messy, pathetic train wreck tonight.

I know that the answer is dig deeper, find it in you and keep going.... but how? It just feels like too much right now.
]]> Partners - Wives, Girlfriends, Boyfriends, Husbands C.J. http://www.rearparty.co.uk/partners-wives-girlfriends-boyfriends-husbands/10654-always-pencil-never-pen.html http://www.rearparty.co.uk/partners-wives-girlfriends-boyfriends-husbands/10654-always-pencil-never-pen.html New and very partial to wine... http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/RearParty/~3/t1AaPpyj4GM/10653-new-very-partial-wine.html Thu, 16 May 2013 18:04:56 GMT Hi guys

Just wanted to say hello. I'm new and currently (albeit somewhat anxiously) awaiting my fiancés tour to Afghan roughly scheduled in Aug. Now, he's in the Army, 38 and we own a house together so I've every hope that he wants to come home to me. My concern (other than his safety) is generally his poor ability to communicate. Honestly, he's hopeless! Lol. Hates talking about anything emotion/feeling based and I hear so many horror stories of women (and maybe men) whose partners come back from tour and a virtually changed person! If my partner gets any less communicative he may as well be mute! Lol.

We've been together 2 and 1/2 years, marry next year. This is the first tour I've seen him do. I don't really know what to expect and as much as my friends can offer some support, they're clueless as to what it's really like. Plus because I'm quite career minded and busy, they all assume I can naturally cope quite well.

I'm hoping to meet some friendly folk who can offer a supportive ear and possibly some advice in this anxious period.

Look forward to meeting you all!
Xx
]]> Welcome http://www.rearparty.co.uk/welcome/10653-new-very-partial-wine.html http://www.rearparty.co.uk/welcome/10653-new-very-partial-wine.html Calling all Army families around Tidworth, Colchester and Ballykinler! http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/RearParty/~3/ECXiLOvb0xs/10652-calling-all-army-families-around-tidworth-colchester-ballykinler.html Thu, 16 May 2013 12:44:34 GMT This year the AFF Roadshows will be in Tidworth, Colchester and Ballykinler. *Tidworth:* *May 22* - Garrison Theatre, Lowa Road, Tidworth... This year the AFF Roadshows will be in Tidworth, Colchester and Ballykinler.

Tidworth: May 22 - Garrison Theatre, Lowa Road, Tidworth Garrison, Tidworth, Wiltshire, SP9 7BT
Colchester: June 4 - The Musket Club, Fallowfield Road, Colchester CO2 9LL
Ballykinler: June 20 - Ballykinler Community Centre, Abercorn Barracks, BFPO 805.

Entry is free for all Army families and includes a picnic lunch.

The day will start at 9.30am. You can pick up goodies and information from stand-holders – including representatives from local authorities. There will also be a question-and-answer style panel, where you can ask questions about Army life which matter to you!

Full details at www.aff.org.uk/roadshows
]]> Army Families Federation http://www.rearparty.co.uk/army-net-aff/10652-calling-all-army-families-around-tidworth-colchester-ballykinler.html http://www.rearparty.co.uk/army-net-aff/10652-calling-all-army-families-around-tidworth-colchester-ballykinler.html Cosmetic disasters / Tattoo removal on TV - Channel 4 opportunity http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/RearParty/~3/bY8fENY8gKk/10651-cosmetic-disasters-tattoo-removal-tv-channel-4-opportunity.html Wed, 15 May 2013 14:48:39 GMT Just had an email in from C4 asking me to publicise this. *HAVE YOU MADE A BEAUTY DECISION YOU NOW REGRET?* Maybe you have permanent lip, brow... Just had an email in from C4 asking me to publicise this.

HAVE YOU MADE A BEAUTY DECISION YOU NOW REGRET?

Maybe you have permanent lip, brow or eye- liner make-up and now wish that you could go back to a more natural look? Or is it lip or face-fillers that you now regret? Have years of extensions left you with damaged hair?

Do you have breast implants that you would like removing or reducing? Or a tattoo that you’re considering getting rid of? Perhaps an ex’s name or a spur of the moment decision?

Channel 4 is looking for women or men who want to reverse beauty treatments they regret or looks they’ve out grown to take part in an exciting new series that explores the reasons behind doing and undoing beauty treatments.

If you’ve had a permanent treatment and are seriously considering getting the work undone, we are interested in speaking to you.

If you would like more information please email us for an applicationform at beautyregrets@endemoluk.comor call us on 0333 577 7741*.



*Standard geographical charges apply. Calls from mobiles may behigher. Applicants must be over 18. We will use your information forthe purpose of selecting participants for the programme and in theproduction of the programme and will only share information with thebroadcaster and any independent contractors involved in theprogramme.
]]> Good_CO http://www.rearparty.co.uk/health-beauty/10651-cosmetic-disasters-tattoo-removal-tv-channel-4-opportunity.html http://www.rearparty.co.uk/health-beauty/10651-cosmetic-disasters-tattoo-removal-tv-channel-4-opportunity.html New- and a smidge nervous! http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/RearParty/~3/MlqR6rI8cX0/10650-new-smidge-nervous.html Wed, 15 May 2013 13:02:37 GMT Hello

After reading your lovely forum for a few months I thought I'd pluck up the courage and join in :)

I've not been with my partner long- only since the beginning of the year, but so far so good. We've done the friends and families bit- and squeezed in a holiday over Easter, I'm smitten and very happy.

After growing up surrounded by an army family I vowed I'd never end up with a chap in the armed forces, but I suppose its true what they say- you can't help who you fall in love with!

He's an RN Officer so of course as they all are- BUSY! However I've been independent and single for a long time and it suits me- though I have to say when communication is a bit lax it has been great coming on here and listening to other gals in the same boat.

While a part of me is doing a 'what on earth have you let yourself in for' dance- the larger- possibly 99% larger part- is completely over the moon. I'd rather have this man for a for five minutes than any other man all year round.

Right- I do believe that sounded a bit fluffy, so is it customary to open a bar?
]]> Welcome More_gin_vicar? http://www.rearparty.co.uk/welcome/10650-new-smidge-nervous.html http://www.rearparty.co.uk/welcome/10650-new-smidge-nervous.html Suggestions? http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/RearParty/~3/An_Uf4Vd6t0/10649-suggestions.html Wed, 15 May 2013 09:18:29 GMT Hi all, I am hoping I can pick you brain as I am having one of those foreigner moments when I end up at a complete loss! My Mr. is back next... Hi all,

I am hoping I can pick you brain as I am having one of those foreigner moments when I end up at a complete loss!

My Mr. is back next week (fingers crossed) in time for the long weekend. We finally found the silver lining of his tour being pushed out by a couple of weeks in that his parents are away, so we have that time for just us without having to go up North right away to visit with them. He's suggested we ' do something nice' that weekend, and then of course dropped off the face of the earth as he occasionally does, leaving me to sort it out.

When he was back on R&R we had a few days in a little cabin up in the Lake District. Beautiful, secluded, fireplace ect. and thats sort of what I am looking for this time around again. The catch being, I'd rather not make him drive for hours and hours right after he gets back. We are in West Berkshire, and hoping to stick fairly close by, not more than 1.5ish hours drive. He says cost not an issue, I say its more sensible to save some money towards our proposed trip out to Canada this summer.

Any suggestions of hotels, cabins, getaways around this general area? I've been looking online, but not being from around these parts I'm not overly familiar with where is nice and where it would be a terrible idea to spend a weekend.

Oh... and any suggestions on where you can get insurance in case something goes terribly wrong and he gets himself stuck in the Sandpit longer than expected?

Cheers :)
]]> C.J. http://www.rearparty.co.uk/travel-holidays/10649-suggestions.html http://www.rearparty.co.uk/travel-holidays/10649-suggestions.html Wierd situation http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/RearParty/~3/zeeJV4dtz7A/10647-wierd-situation.html Mon, 13 May 2013 15:59:31 GMT Today I found out that one of the guys I work in the same office with, who has been off sick for three weeks, will be coming back to work on... Today I found out that one of the guys I work in the same office with, who has been off sick for three weeks, will be coming back to work on wednesday AS A WOMAN.

I find this situation very difficult to get my head round, especially as, even before we weren't really friends, simply a working relationship.

I know how I should react but I'm wondering how I will react when I see him/her on wednesday.

This has come as a total surprise.
]]> The Lounge Egg Banjo http://www.rearparty.co.uk/lounge/10647-wierd-situation.html http://www.rearparty.co.uk/lounge/10647-wierd-situation.html SSFA http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/RearParty/~3/ICunf3zARSw/10646-ssfa.html Mon, 13 May 2013 15:57:58 GMT Hi everyone again, I'm after your infinite wisdom and knowledge.

Fiance is currently filling in form for housing (he doesn't have access to DII at present but the clerk is sending him one? Hope that sounds right!) so that I don't have to go to the HIVE as it's 30 miles away.

I joined the Facebook group for the patch and read that there's a massive shortage of officer's housing at present there and people are being given SSFA. Now, I can't work out what happens with SSFA (despite having read all the relevant documents and AFF website). If you accept the offer (which we would, have been warmed against turning it down), I understand they have until 51 days out (or similar) to withdraw the offer and give you SFA instead. Saying that doesn't happen and we go ahead and move in, do we stay on the "waiting list" for SFA? Or do we have to stay in SSFA for the duration? I'd rather be on the patch as it's mega convenient for his and my work, plus there seems to be lots going on there.

Also if they offer us SSFA, I understand they'll give us a couple to choose from, but do they tend to offer ok areas? I'm not overly fussed about the house, but having lived in some very rough areas as a student I'd rather avoid the hassles that come with living in a dump of a street now that I am working long shifts.


Thanks all in advance. X
]]> Patch and Pads Lilly311 http://www.rearparty.co.uk/patch-pads/10646-ssfa.html http://www.rearparty.co.uk/patch-pads/10646-ssfa.html Knit Yourself A Royal Marine (Or Matelot)! http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/RearParty/~3/jBcjTdpvDSI/10645-knit-yourself-royal-marine-matelot.html Mon, 13 May 2013 11:06:41 GMT Not only can you now knit yourself your very own Royal Marine or Matelot, you can also knit one to send to the Royal Navy and Royal Marines... Not only can you now knit yourself your very own Royal Marine or Matelot, you can also knit one to send to the Royal Navy and Royal Marines Children’s Fund, so come on, cast on!

The Royal Navy & Royal Marines Children’s Fund (RN&RMCF), the only charity dedicated to supporting children whose parents work for the Naval Services, is looking for knitters to volunteer their time and their spare wool to create small dolls for the charity.

As part of a sensitive new 2013 initiative called ‘Knit the Family’ the charity is focusing on the importance of knitting families back together when one of the parents returns from active military service. Central to the initiative will be a support handbook aimed at providing practical help and guidance for the family in helping to overcome the effects of PTSD and OSR (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder and Operational Stress Reaction).

The charity is planning to distribute the book with the little knitted dolls that depict a generic parent and child holding hands to symbolise the importance of ‘knitting’ families back together…. But to do this they need volunteers to knit the small dolls.

Full details including the patterns can be found here:

Materials Needed | RNRMCF

Royal Marine Doll | RNRMCF

Royal Navy Doll | RNRMCF

Little Girl Doll 2 | RNRMCF

Laughing Hens, the knitting website for all your knitting needs has kindly offered a 10% discount to those buying wool or other items to knit the small dolls when quoting ‘RNRMCF’ at the checkout.

Knitting patterns, yarns, fabrics, sewing, quilting, patchwork, and accessories

The pattern for the dolls has been specially created by Fiona Goble, who published ‘Knit your own Royal Wedding’ in 2011 with Ivy Press Limited who have kindly donated the pattern to the RN&RMCF. Fiona Goble and Ivy Press have also published books such as Knit Your Own Zombie, Fairy Tale Knits and and recently a pattern to ‘Knit Your Own Royal Baby’.

Ivy Press is an innovative publisher and packager of creative, highly illustrated books and stationery | Ivy Press Limited

Monique Bateman, Director of RN&RMCF says:

“People are always incredibly generous towards our charity because everyone recognises the sadness, especially for children, caused by disharmony in the home. Returning service personnel have much to contend with as do their families and what we are trying to achieve is a more seamless reintegration into family life. The little dolls are rich in symbolism and we desperately need volunteers to click their needles for us”.

If you think you can help by knitting a parent and child, please send your completed dolls to:

Natalie Lloyd
Spider PR
4 Leathermarket Street
London
SE1 3HN

The Royal Navy and Royal Marines Children’s Fund has supported children whose parents work, or have worked, for the Naval Service for over a hundred years.

At the outset, the Children’s Fund primarily supported the children of ex-servicemen, although over the years, the evolution of society and war has turned the tide and, at present, around 80% of its beneficiaries’ parents are still serving.

This is, however, not the only aspect of The Royal Navy and Royal Marines Children’s Fund to change and develop since it was established. The areas the Children’s Fund provides support for have expanded and now include childcare, special needs education, days out and in-home support in times of crisis.

An area of particular growth has been the Charity’s focus on assisting children within its remit who have special needs. This work now accounts for nearly half of its awards to beneficiaries.

In the last year alone, The Royal Navy and Royal Marines Children’s Fund has supported over 1,500 children, but with over 40,000 servicemen currently in the Naval Service, it is keen to ensure that naval families know where to find it.

TRUSTEES

The Trustees are made up of serving officers or other naval personnel together with civilian Trustees who bring experience in other fields to the many problems encountered. Consideration of every circumstance is therefore given swift and sympathetic attention by people who understand the difficulties of service and seafaring life.

Patron

Her Majesty The Queen

President

Vice Admiral Sir Adrian Johns KCB CBE

Vice Presidents

Major General EGM Davis CBE CGRM
Major General FHR Howes OBE
Major General G S Robison CB

Director

Monique Bateman MBE

Caseworker
]]> Charity soleil http://www.rearparty.co.uk/charity/10645-knit-yourself-royal-marine-matelot.html http://www.rearparty.co.uk/charity/10645-knit-yourself-royal-marine-matelot.html