To blog or not to blog….

When I decided my old website needed a face lift, I heard–and read–tons of advice: “You need to be blogging, not just writing a newsletter.” Why? I questioned peers and studied the words of experienced bloggers and thought, “Does the world really need one more blog? I mean, who cares? And why? Who wants to read my private thoughts and opinions, anyway? And with my schedule, would it be blogging or bogging?

What Is Blogging?

What is blogging anyway? If you’re new, you can find plenty of generic introductions to blogging, like this one from Wordpress, Daniel Scocco’s post at Dailyblogtips.com, or any of Michael Hyatt’s posts such as “How to Start a Blog.” An article called ”Christian Blog Evangelism” shares some “how-to’s” while encouraging Christians to write blogs from a Christian worldview.

Why Start a Blog?

Everyone has his own reasons for blogging. Sue Gunelius, an About.com guide, lists “Ten Top Reasons to Start a Blog,” like marketing your product, sharing an opinion, helping people, connecting with others, and making a difference. “Just journal your thoughts,” someone else offers. “Blogging is just journaling your thoughts to the world.”

Hmm. I actually love journaling. Years ago as a young mom I remember sitting for hours writing both my complaints and celebrations–intended for God’s ears alone. Sometimes I’d think, “Am I wasting my time?” I shamed myself for chaining my heart to a pen and a desk, pouring out words no one would ever hear–while work sat untended. Who cared about my scribbling? God did. And He encouraged me.

So I continued to journal through the years. In the process, penning my thoughts has also helped me become more accountable. How? By taking the truths God has shown me through His Word and through personal reflection, and applying them to my own life. 

So, what does all this have to do with blogging? For me, the thought of “accountability” triggered an additional reason to start a blog. In the same way as journaling does, writing publicly–as in blogging–makes me accountable to both God and others: Will I write what I live and live what I write? Whether we like it or not, our words represent us, who we are, and what we believe. And when you are “out there” blogging, your vulnerability may rise by volumes. But so can your positive influence. 

Should I or should I not blog? After considering a multitude of reasons, I listed some pro’s and con’s for myself. 

Seven Reasons for Not Blogging 

• Everyone else is doing it.
• It will make me look good and feel important.
• It will improve my social status.
• It will help me acquire more followers.
• It will help make a better resume.
• It gives me a platform for sharing my own opinions.
• It establishes me as an expert.

Seven Reasons for Blogging

• It uses my creativity and unique, God-given gifts.
• It will keep me accountable to God and others.
• It can broaden my ministry influence.
• It can attract more followers to Christ.
• It can help make a difference.
• It gives me an opportunity to share God’s encouragement.
• It can showcase God as the expert.

Focus

Blogging experts remind us, “Focus your blogs;” “Target your audience.” So what is my focus? Here’s what I hope my blogs focus on: encouragement–precisely, encouraging others, heart to heart. Most of the time the content is devotionally driven. And who is my audience? Like my personal journaling, maybe only One, but I hope the blogs also encourage you–whoever you are, whatever you do.  

Does that mean your blog should only focus on a Christian message? No, all of us have practical skills and expertise we can share with others that will enrich their lives. And your particular worldview usually rises to the surface, no matter what you write. Each has his own unique reason–and her own special purpose for blogging. Only you can determine that purpose for yourself.

So, now that I’m blogging, who cares? Maybe no one. But God does. So I write for Him, to Him, and often about Him through the eyes of both a student and a follower. And in so doing, it encourages me and keeps me accountable.  If I encourage only one other person, then it will be worth the time. And if that person is you, then I will have written that blog just for you.

Should You Start a Blog?

But what about you? Should you start a blog? You may or may not be a writer. If you are an author, check out Thomas Umstattd’s blog at authortechtips.com. In addition to his posts on blogging, he offers plenty of helpful technical tips for authors. On my resource page I’ve listed more helpful blogs on writing as well, like Steve Laube’s or Chip MacGregor’s blog.

But if you’re not an author and have no desire to write professionally, and if you have no reason to “market” a product or service, remember that you can still use blogging to effectively connect with people by sharing your own unique thoughts. Obviously, blogging is not just “journaling.” I found support blogs for cancer survivors, helps for Moms like Jill Savage’s blog or MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers),  as well as tips by expert gardeners like Allan Becker. Even with all the social networking sites, scores of people still enjoy personal blogging.

Each One, Encourage One

In a 2008 Blog Herald post, Anne Helmond stated that Technorati was tracking over 112.8 million blogs–which might only include the English language blogosphere.With so many voices floating around in cyberspace, why start a blog at all? Whether you decide to or not, everyone can be an encourager where you live or work. What skills can you pass on to someone else? What experiences might benefit another? What lessons have you learned or stories you can share that would give hope, laughter, or help to others? Another parent may need your support; a friend could benefit from your advice; a youth could use your wisdom; a senior may need your respect. If each one encourages one…think of the positive impact we could have on others, just by encouraging others, one heart at a time.

And we all need accountability.

“And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus” (Colossians 3:17, NIV).

What about you? What do you think? I’ve been a writer for over 30 years, but I hope to never stop learning. If you get a chance, check out my website and my recent blog posts if you missed my last ones.  Are they encouraging to you? If so, pass them on and encourage someone else. I’d love to hear your comments about any of these subjects.

Will you help encourage others, one heart at a time, this week–through a kind word, a thoughtful deed, a listening ear, or an anonymous service? Just to inspire you, would you read this (Words to Live By) on my greeting card page? You truly can make a difference.

Most of us have heard that silence is golden. But sometimes silence can hurt.

We held one of those infamous garage sales at our home recently–the kind where you clean out closets, drag out forgotten things from under beds, and purge the garage of stacked “stuff” that won’t fit into your house. It’s always fun to meet interesting people who stop by to view your wares. Occasionally, they’ll stay long enough to share personal stories.

This sale was no exception. An attractive boomer-age woman who came by told us of an experience that happened to her mother years earlier. This is my paraphrase of her story: 

Her mom had just moved to a large metropolitan area and was hoping to meet and make friends in her new home. She joined several organizations, including a local church. But no one would befriend her. No one even spoke to her.

Is it my deodorant? My clothes? The way I talk? A hundred questions raced through her mind, but she found no answers. Women seemed to avoid her as if she had a contagious disease. No one spoke to her or invited her to their home.

Finally, her mother decided to confide in one woman whom she respected, one of the women leaders in the church women’s organization. “What’s wrong with me? Have I angered someone? Why is everyone avoiding me?”

The woman leader frowned slightly and looked around, then spoke in a hushed tone. “Are you sure you want to know?”

“Of course, I do. Please, if you know something, tell me!”

The leader continued in a soft whisper-voice. “It’s–it’s the company you keep.”

“The company I keep? What do you mean?”

She took a deep breath and said, “It’s your lifestyle. You have police cars coming and going to your house, night and day. A woman of your reputation and your kind of company, um, doesn’t exactly paint a good, wholesome picture. The ladies are offended by this kind of activity.

 Her mother’s eyes widened as a she tried to stifle a grin. “Would you do me a favor? Ask some of the ladies to come to my home this Tuesday for lunch. I’d like to show you something.”

“Well, um, I don’t know….” The woman stammered, shaking her head.

“Please, just ask. You and the ladies come at 12:00 Noon this Tuesday. I’ll have lunch waiting.”

The ladies decided to go together as a group and accept her mother’s invitation. But when they arrived at Noon on Tuesday, just as they expected, police cars surrounded her mother’s home. Her mom invited the women in and took them immediately to her kitchen where she had prepared lunch. Eight uniformed police officers sat at the kitchen table, eating lunch.

Turning to the women, then pointing to the policemen, her mother smiled and said, “I want you to meet some special people in my life: “This is my husband, my brother, my son, my son-in-law, my brother-in-law, my nephew…They’re all police officers.”

The mother had no problem with friendships from that point on.

Silence is not always golden. And the absence of words can do just as much damage as speaking harmful ones. We may not start a juicy morsel of gossip. But saying nothing is just as bad, especially if we believe without checking out the truth for ourselves.

Words originate with thoughts. And God knows the thoughts of our hearts. Things are not always as they seem. Judging–or jumping–to the wrong conclusions can discourage the hearer. And who hasn’t been the victim growing up at one time or another with the powerful effects of “the silent treatment?” To “ice” others by refusing to acknowledge their presence or to express our disapproval of them may prove a point, but it won’t win friends. Both of these methods involve an intentional withdrawal of affection. It’s so–pharisaical and just plain, mean-spirited.

God knows our need for encouragement. “Encourage one another daily,” (Hebrews 3:13). Encouraging words are like warm blankets that ward off hurtful, icy blasts. And in the wintertime moments of our lives, we all need a warm blanket.

Have you ever misjudged someone? Or been the object of someone’s hurtful gossip? How has someone been a “warm blanket” for you with their encouraging words? Remembering how it feels may help you go searching in your spiritual closet for some spare blankets. Those kind should never be sold in a garage sale. Instead, dispense them freely to everyone you meet.

Have you ever tried to build a marriage with bricks? Encouraging words might help you do that. 

Today’s post is from a guest writer–my husband, Larry:

“To encourage or ‘edify’ literally means ‘to build a home.’ The writer of Proverbs said wisely, ‘A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver’ (Proverbs 25:11, NIV).  As you edify your mate, you are constructing your marriage, buiding a rock-solid foundation for your home out of love and consideration. How do you do that?

“Affirming words are strong bricks that build esteem in our mates, especially when we offer them with precise timing–like when Rebecca has just put on her dress and is looking at herself in the mirror with that ‘I-sure-don’t-look-as-good-in-this-as-I-used-to’ look on her face. Bingo! What an opportune moment to reassure her that I still find her extremely attractive. Or when I’m staring at my to-do-list with that ‘I’ll-never-get-all-of-this-done’ look on my face, it’s a great time for Rebecca to give me a word of thanks and encouragement for working to provide for her and the family.

“I remember a time in our marriage when I had resigned my position on our church staff and was trying to determine what God really wanted me to be doing. I felt discouraged and was wrestling with self-doubt. Rebecca and I were sitting on the couch in the den one night shortly after my resignation, when she turned to me and said, ‘You know, you’re really awesome.’

“‘I am?’”

“She began to enumerate the ways she considered me to be a blessing in life: the ways I supported her, the strength she drew from me, my sensitivity to the children, my wisdom as a spiritual leader. She piled up ‘apples of gold in settings of silver’ on me that refreshed and brightened me in a way that nothing else could have done. I got up the next morning ready to face the future with confidence.”1

That’s a short exerpt from the book Larry and I wrote together: Marriage Toners, Weekly Exercises to Strengthen Your Relationship.  We hope to have that book available soon on our website as an e-book. You can read more about it on our marriage enrichment page–as well as information on our marriage enrichment retreats. The principles in that book have transformed our marriage through the years, and we love encouraging couples any way we can!

I wish Larry and I could say we’ve always encouraged each other through uplifting, encouraging words. But probably like you, we forget easily. Your circumstances may differ completely from ours. It doesn’t matter. All couples need to work at “building the home” together. Maybe you, like us, need some quick reminders on how to do that. If so, practicing affirming words is a good place to start. Try building with these quick encouraging word “bricks”:

1. Catch each other doing something good, positive, or helpful. Brag on them for doing it!
2. Write down your spouse’s positive characteristics. Then compliment them in those areas often.
3. Find something good to say about your spouse daily–regardless of how your day went.
4. Think up an encouraging word picture that describes your spouse or how you feel about them (Song of Songs in the Bible is full of word pictures. You may just need to make yours more, um, 21st century-ish). Instead of saying, “Your teeth are like a flock of sheep…” (Song of Songs 4:2 NIV), you might say: “Honey, I love your beautiful smile! It’s like a bright ray of sunshine that lights up my heart.”

Everyone loves a good word.

What about you? What kind of encouraging “bricks” have you used to build your marriage?

1Larry & Rebecca Jordan, Marriage Toners 

We were keeping our two-year-old grandson Caden recently, and we noticed he kept sticking his foot (sandal) in his mouth, biting his shoe, while riding in the car seat.

“Yuk, Caden!” I’d say. “Don’t put your foot in your mouth!” I’d yank it out. Then he’d look at me with mischievous eyes and do it again.

“No, Caden, Shooey! Yukky!” I didn’t know what words to say to emphasize the meaning enough for a toddler to understand.

One time he decided to munch on the ground up gum mixed with black asphalt pebbles that clung to the bottom of his sandal. I guess he thought that might taste cool. “Shoe’s dirty, Caden!” I’d take the sandal out and a few seconds later, the game would begin again.

Like other kids his age, Caden’s just a curious child. It’s a game to him. Hopefully he’ll discover that’s not the most “clean” thing to do. After all, shoes carry germs. And germs can play havoc with our health.

We’re not kids anymore, and as grownups we know better than to stick our foot in our mouths. But unfortunately we do it anyway. Yuk! When that happens to me, I jokingly refer to it as the “gift of blurt.” But it’s not always a laughing matter.

You know what I’m talking about: words you spit out faster than you allow your brain (or the Holy Spirit) to edit them. We may utter an uncensored piece of truth, mixed with a gob of “grit.” We say the wrong thing, the embarassing thing, a hurtful thing, a thoughtless thing. And once we stick our foot in our mouth, the damage has been done. The germs are spread and they carry their “poison” to all who hear. Spiritually, it’s extremely “unhealthy”.

Wholesome, encouraging words give grace to the hearer. It’s time to grow up and stop putting a sooty foot in our mouths. Perhaps it would even be wise to remove our shoes in the presence of God and allow Him to put His words in our mouths instead.

“Do not let any unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment that it will give grace to those who hear” Ephesians 4:29 (NIV).

ENCOURAGING WORDS THAT BRING GRACE TO THE HEARER

AND GREATNESS TO YOUR LIFE OR BUSINESS

1. “You may be right.”
2. “I forgive you.”
3. “I was wrong.”
4. “God loves you, and so do I.”
5. “Thank you so much. I appreciate you.”
6. “It’s my pleasure.” (Chick-fil-a® has built a great business by training their personnel to emphasize these three simple words to every customer.)

What’s your prescription for the gift of “blurt”? What humorous experiences have you had with the gift of “blurt”? What kind of words bring grace to you (and can spell greatness to the lives of others)?

I love words. Words can change your life. Words are my vocation, partly because of some encouraging words I received when I was only a senior in high school.

Years ago, a stranger clipped my senior picture from the local paper and enclosed it with a hand-written, encouraging note in the mail: “You have a beautiful smile.” Just five words–and a simple gesture that took maybe five or ten minutes, but can you guess I started flashing my pearly whites after that?

Those thoughtful words made such an impression on me that I decided I could do the same thing. As a young wife and mom I started scouring our small-town newspaper for articles about people: wedding announcements, death notices, school honorees–anything that warranted a “Good for you!” “I’m praying for you,” or “I’m so sorry.”

People would call me, wondering why a stranger would take the time to send them a note. I wasn’t trying to enlist them for anything. I was simply copying a kind deed someone had done for me. I kept remembering Paul’s words in the book of Acts that talked about how Jesus went about doing good (Acts 10:38). Maybe my simple “words” could classify as doing some good for others.

But it took a negative experience to cement my belief in the true power of encouragement: working in a job where words of encouragement were as scarce as the time given me to complete the demanding work overload for two anxious employers. I was young and inexperienced but it seemed as if mistakes were, um, unforgivable. The constant lack of grace, sensitivity, and encouragement left me drained–and sent me home sprawling across my bed in tears on many nights.

I hadn’t yet discovered my love of words through writing then, but I knew enough to recognize the power of positive, encouraging words. God reminded me of the powerful words of Proverbs 25:11 (NIV): “A word aptly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver.”

The job ended after a year but my determination solidified: With God’s help, I would always try to paint word pictures that would bring beauty, encouragement, and healing–ones that would create “apples of gold in settings of silver” in the hearts of others.

Ultimately it was–and is–God’s encouragement that constantly lifts my spirits and keeps me positive and loving life. Listen to some of His words of encouragement:

• “I will be with you” (Isaiah 43:2 NIV).
• “My peace I give you” (John 14:27 NIV).
• “I will not forget you” (Isaiah 49:15 NIV).
• “I will give you rest” (Matthew 11:28 NIV).
• “You are precious and honored” (Isaiah 43:4 NIV).

Now, those are the kind of words that can change your life.

What about you? When and how have you discovered the power of encouragement? What words have encouraged you? How have the words of God and others changed your life? Challenge for study: What five words in Scripture can you find that have made (or could make) a difference in your life?

(Condensed adaptation from Day-votions™ for Women, © 2009, Rebecca Barlow Jordan (Grand Rapids, Michigan: Zondervan).

Like a silhouette in the night, the young couple plodded through the streets of Bethlehem. Every place they stopped, they heard the same message: “No room.” Tired and discouraged, they bowed weary heads at the last inn. As they turned to go, the innkeeper shouted, “Wait! Come back! I do have a stable. It’s not much, but the straw will make a soft bed for your wife.”

Donkeys brayed. Cows mooed as if to protest this intrusion. Sheep bleated their objections. The wind outside howled angrily through the trees. But the couple settled in, speaking softly to the animals. The young woman’s time to give birth grew near. The animals grew quiet, as if furry mothers were empathizing with this painful act.

Suddenly, a loud wail pierced the night air. Then silence. Deafening silence. Every animal in the stable turned and looked at the young couple–as if listening for the grand finale. And then it came. The sweet cry of a newborn Baby and a mother’s hush. “His name is Jesus,” whispered the father, as if announcing to his animal congregation.

And then legend says a strange thing happened. One by one, every cow, every sheep, every donkey, every four-footed creature present that wintry night dropped to their knees, as if bowing in humble reverence before the Holy child. Trees and plants outside began to sway in perfect rhythm, and all of God’s creation joined the angels in singing heavenly praise to the Christ born at Bethlehem.

A far-fetched legend? Perhaps. But if God could silence Zechariah, the father of Jesus’ forerunner, and make Baalam’s donkey speak to reprimand his master, could He not also give voices to His creatures on that wondrous night?

One thing’s for sure. When you embrace the miracle of Christ’s birth, it’s impossible to keep silent.1

“Then the Lord opened the donkey’s mouth.” Numbers 22:28 NIV

1 Rebecca Barlow Jordan, “Night of Miracles,” Copyright 2002 Cook Communications Ministries, Christmas with God  by Honor Books. Used with permission. May not be further reproduced. All rights reserved.

Have you experienced a Christmas miracle that would bring encouragement to readers? I’d love to hear about them!