Red Sneaker

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Britney Federline

Just read Britney Spears wants to be Britney Federline.
She obviously just want to be normal and treated like everyone else. And just because she has millions of dollars for (in part) dressing in provacative outfits and dancing around, doesn't make her any different, right?
Well, I have to break some news to you, Britney Federline.
As the one time top Exotic Dancer for a Lesbian Trucker Strip club, I can tell you once you gyrate your "Money Maker", all bets are off. It no longer mattered my political background, intelligence, or what name I wanted them to call me (Rock Hardaway) they always did what ever they wanted (referring to me as Flabby Cathy).
So Britney, you can't have it both ways.....you can show some skin and make the money as Spears or you can hang up your latex pants and make scale (plus expenses--because lip gloss is kinda spendy for the good stuff)as Mrs. Federline.
The choice is yours.
THe world knows what my choice was.....and they will have to deal with a world without Rock Hardaway!

Mary Jane

I am chewing on a piece of candy given to me.
Made by our friends at Necco, the candy (a sort of Bit-O-Honey rip off) called Mary Jane.
Now, I'm not exactly a drug-smart kinda guy. But I've watched enough Cheech and Chong movies to know a pot reference when I see one.
Maybe I'll try the other candies with names like "Reefer Pieces" and "Weed-Cha-ma-Call-it". I think I'll wait for a few minutes just to make sure I don't get mellow and have a case of the munchies.
Ya know, I've never see someone actually smoke a piece of Halloween candy before.
Let's hope I never see it again!

Non-Dairy Whipped Toppings

I love non-dairy whipped toppings!
LOVE THEM!
It's difficult to emphasize that in writing!

It started with Dream Whip as a child. Loved it!
Grew up and discovered Cool Whip (not the lite stuff).
Fairly recently I have found the geniuses at Non-Dairy whipped topping world have had a break through--Thicker, creamier Cool Whip!
It's like the Double Stuf Oreo of Whipped toppings!
Thank you Cool Whip researchers!
Thank you

Weekend

Well a weekend is upon us and our is going quite well.
Jen is working on her next painting inspiration and I am assisting whereever possible (i.e. fetching fresh water and keeping iTunes rolling with new music).
After this, we will settle in for a nice game of strip ping pong followed by the use of a bull horn and the words, "Lather, Rinse, Repeat"
Ah yes. Life is good at the Matthews' house.

Domain Name Blues

My birthday is coming up in a few weeks, and my Dad asked me what I wanted. Being the techie family that we are, I asked for a domain name.
Dad came through! Thank you Dad!
I am handling all the sign ups and such. In my research, I found what I thought was a heck of a deal. Turns out I was totally wrong.
Here's how it went:
October 4: Sign up for hosting services and register domain name.

October 5: I receive a login to the hosting company site. I log in and cruise around. I'm pretty happy....until I hit the forums. Specifically the user forums where I find posts from current customers on how they signed up and still don't have web space and how no one can contact the company.
Being the skeptic that I am, I try contacting the company support. Voicemail box is full. E-mail wasn't returned. It was then it was brought to my attention that this company filled for dissolution very recently. Crap!

October 6th: I contact my credit card company to see if I have the ability to stop the company from fraudulently charging my account without providing service. Turns out the company has a hold and not a charge....so I can't file a dispute yet.
Instead the nice Credit Card Operator gives me the name of the company and the contact phone number. I call the phone number and it's a tech support line for a different web hosting company attended by two of the rudest people I have ever had the non privelidge of speaking to. They provided no information besides that the company holding funds on my card was their parent company. They would provide no other information. This is starting to stink like a dead fish. I hit Google and after some delving boolean searches, I find that the parent company is at the same address as several other companies in the same suite. Odd. I track down each of those companies that seem to be legit...and each with their own phone numbers. I finally trace it all down to a name. First name Rick. I am leaving off the last name intentionally. I search some more until I am satisfied that if I need to, I could contact Rick, or his wife Lisa, or what is possibly one of their cell phones.
Now to see what happens next.

October 7th: I request the hsot that gives me a bad feeling and doesn't have a great record cancel my hosting plan. No response yet. I scout out other possible hosting companies and find a gem. One I've heard of and one someone my brother knows uses and likes.
I Begin asking questions lining up what is necessary to transfer my domain name to the new host. Still no confirmation on the cancellation.

October 8th: Today. Find out the registrar of the domain name....and make contact to them to change the technical information to my own information and allow me to change the name server addresses. Now I wait.
I wait to see if the host is cancelled. I wait to see if I can gain access to my own domain name information, and I wait to see if I need to make some phone calls to Rick in Detroit.
Cross your fingers. I'm crossing mine.

Say what

I have been a naughty blogger.
Not updating for days. Bad bad bad blogger.

As punishment, I have lost my voice.
That's right. The usual morning conversatin I have with my faithful companion, Mr. Pepsi One, was curtailed on the drive to work this morning. Both of us unusually quiet.
This may not seem like a big deal, but considering I have several important meetings today where I am required to speak....quite a bit, plus I will be teaching a 3 hour class tonight.
It is a bit humorous.
The good news is...all my talking...I will have to express in written (or typed) words.
Watch out!

Top 10 least popular Halloween Treats

Listening To:Ministry - Every Day is Halloween
Halloween is my favorite holiday of the year. The candy, the costumes, and legalized nudity make this the best holiday of the year!
Which is why I would like to present:
Top ten least popular Halloween treats

10. A Handful of Red Man
9. Anything with the "Fear Factor" logo on it
8. Chocolate covered mice.
7. Lice-Krispy Treats
6. Ear Wax Lips
5. Rhesus Primate Pieces
4. Carp Tarts
3. K-Y Jello
2. BreastMilk Duds
1. Poop Rocks

Tick...tick...tick

Listening To: Neil Young - Weld
Life is all about balance.
Somethings weigh you down while others lift you up.
Today compared to yesterday is like day and night.
Yesterday, I win dinner and tickets to a local show, a couple books I ordered from Amazon using a free gift certificate arrived, the weather was beautiful.
Today, it's kinda yucky outside. My truck wouldn't start this morning and I forgot my soda in my truck. I'm waiting for the next bomb to drop.

Little Bunny Foo Foo.....

All I can remember was the nice little bunny scooping up field mice inflicting massive head trauma.
What have we learned from Little Bunny Foo Foo?
No matter how cuddly and innocent looking you are, you are capable murdering thousands of smaller mammals just for your amusement.....and for the cool hand gestures.