Happy Days Coming Soon

DESTINY CALLING... are you listening...: Job Interview, Part - 5 {The Last Part}

2011-12-12T01:40:00.000-08:00

DESTINY CALLING... are you listening...: Job Interview, Part - 5 {The Last Part}: Continued from my previous posts, " Job Interview, Part - 1 " ( http://ansumanjena.blogspot.com/2011/11/job-interview-part-1.html ) " ...

DESTINY CALLING... are you listening...: Half Full or Half Empty

2011-12-10T09:54:00.000-08:00

DESTINY CALLING... are you listening...: Half Full or Half Empty: We all know about the story of the Half full or Half empty glass. The story is symbolic and much discussed because it draws a line be...

DESTINY CALLING... are you listening...: Six Beautiful Interview Questions... Think out of ...

2011-11-27T18:06:00.000-08:00

DESTINY CALLING... are you listening...: Six Beautiful Interview Questions... Think out of ...: Here are some of the typic al Interview questions asked to find out if the candidates have "out of box" thinking capability !!! Que...

Get Real Money

2011-01-16T20:46:00.000-08:00

Get Real

SFI - Turn 5 hours a week into $500 a month in extra income

2011-01-13T01:36:00.000-08:00

SFI - Turn 5 hours a week into $500 a month in extra income

A nice dating story

2010-07-01T03:55:00.000-07:00

I went on a blind date about 10 years ago with a guy who was pretty good-looking, decent dancer, although a bit "country " for me. (I 'm a true city girl) We were dancing to a slow song when he leans over & says, "You smell better than most of the women I date! " I almost fell over laughing & then wondered just what kind of women this guy has been dating! I mean, I smelled clean & probably had on some perfume, but I would think he 'd expect his dates to smell good.

Maybe he was dating women who rolled around in the pig pen?

Another time, I was set up by a friend of mine on a blind date. I should have known better. My friend told me this guy was handsome, smart, & fun to be around. OK, this is MALE talk for "okay looking, nerdy, & drop-dead boring. " We went to see Apollo 13 in the theater (does the movie give away my age or what?) & I hung out into the aisle the entire movie. (I was sitting on the end near the aisle).

On the drive home, Mr. Nerdy whispered in my ear, "You 're more beautiful than I thought you 'd be! " I was SO uncomfortable at that point, & that comment just made it worse. I finally got home, got out of the car, & RAN inside the house. I mean, I was bookin ' it! I could have killed my friend for setting me up w/ that guy. Thank heavens I 'm out of the dating pool!

Accident

2010-07-01T03:51:00.001-07:00

A woman and a man are involved in a car accident on a snowy, cold Monday morning. Both of their cars are totally demolished but amazingly neither of them is hurt. God works in Mysterious ways.

After they crawl out of their cars, the woman says, "So you're a man. That's interesting. I'm a woman. Wow, just look at our cars! There's nothing left, but we're unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace for the rest of our days".

Flattered, the man replies, "Oh yes, I agree with you completely, this must be a sign from God!"

The woman continues, "And look at this, here's another miracle. My car is completely demolished but this bottle of wine didn't break. Surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune." Then she hands the bottle to the man.

The man nods his head in agreement, opens it and drinks half the bottle and then hands it back to the woman. The woman takes the bottle and immediately puts the cap back on, and hands it back to the man.

The man asks, "Aren't you having any?"

The woman replies, "No. I think I'll just wait for the police.... "

what women really means

2010-06-18T23:13:00.001-07:00

Real meaning of Woman sentence

We need REALLY MEANS I want

You want REALLY MEANS You need

It's your decision REALLY MEANS The correct decision should be obvious by now.

We need to talk REALLY MEANS I need to complain

Do what you want REALLY MEANS You'll pay for this later.

You're ... so manly REALLY MEANS You need a shave and you sweat a lot.

Sure... go ahead REALLY MEANS I don't want you to.

I'm not upset REALLY MEANS Of course I'm upset, you moron!

You're certainly attentive tonight. REALLY MEANS Is sex all you ever think about?

I'm not emotional! And I'm not overreacting! REALLY MEANS I'm on my period.

Be romantic, turn out the lights. REALLY MEANS I'm Embarrassed

This kitchen is so inconvenient REALLY MEANS I want a new house.

You have to learn to communicate. REALLY MEANS Just agree with me.

Yes REALLY MEANS No

No REALLY MEANS No

Maybe REALLY MEANS No

I heard a noise REALLY MEANS I noticed you were almost asleep.

Do you love me? REALLY MEANS I'm going to ask for something expensive.

How much do you love me? REALLY MEANS I did something you're not going to like.

I'll be ready in a minute. REALLY MEANS Be patient I'll be a while.

Am I a little fat? REALLY MEANS Tell me I'm beautiful.

I'm sorry. REALLY MEANS You'll be sorry.

Do you like this recipe? REALLY MEANS It's easy to fix, so get used to it.

Was that the baby? REALLY MEANS Why don't you wake up and deal with the baby.

I'm not yelling! REALLY MEANS Yes I am yelling because I think this is important.

All we're going to buy is a soap dish REALLY MEANS Major shopping trip. Did you bring your checkbook?

The life cycle of the Mercedes

2010-06-07T12:26:00.000-07:00

Old age dating

2010-05-27T11:29:00.000-07:00

An old couple who had not been out on a date in a very long time was spending Saturday evening at home as usual.

As they sat watching TV, the man looked toward where his wife was sitting and asked in an affectionate tone, "Do you want to go out, little lady?"

Pleasantly surprised the lady replied without hesitation, "Oh, my, of course I want to, let's go!"

They had a great night out, and toward the end of the evening the lady turned to her husband and said, "I had a great time, but be honest. What happened to make you ask me on date after so many years?"

Well dear I have to tell you, I didn't ask you on a date at all. I was asking our dog Muffin, who was sitting next to your chair, if she wanted to go for a walk.

Albert Einstein: Scientific Revolution

2010-05-27T11:27:00.003-07:00

Albert Einstein was visited one day by one of his students. "The questions on this year's exam are the same as last year's!" the young man exclaimed. "Yes," Einstein replied, "but this year all the answers are different."

Weight Loss Plan For U............

2010-05-20T00:56:00.000-07:00

A man calls a company and orders their 5-day, 10 lb. weight loss program.

The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old babe dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck.

She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company.

The sign reads, "If you can catch me, you can have me."

Without a second thought, he takes off after her.

A few miles later huffing and puffing, he finally gives up.

The same girl shows up for the next four days and the same thing happens.

On the fifth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 10 lbs. as promised.

He calls the company and orders their 5-day/20 pound program.

The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning and beautiful woman he has ever seen in his life.

She is wearing nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, "If you catch me you can have me."

Well, he's out the door after her like a shot.

This girl is in excellent shape and he does his best, but no such luck.

So for the next four days, the same routine happens with him gradually getting in better and better shape.

Much to his delight on the fifth day when he weighs himself, he discovers that he has lost another 20 lbs. as promised.

He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day/50 pound program.

"Are you sure?" asks the representative on the phone. "This is our most rigorous program."

"Absolutely," he replies, "I haven't felt this good in years."

The next day there's a knock at the door; and when he opens it he finds a huge muscular guy standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a sign around his neck that reads,"If I catch you, you are mine!!!"

He lost 63 pounds that week.

Appraisal Art

2010-05-20T00:45:00.000-07:00

Big Boss: This year your performance was good, excellent and outstanding. So, your rating is
"average".

Kumar : What? How come 'average'?

Big Boss : Because...err...uhh...you lack domain knowledge.

Kumar : But last year you said I am a domain expert and you put me in this project as a domain
consultant.

Big Boss : Oh is it? Well, in that case, I think your domain Knowledge has eroded this year.

Kumar : What???

Big Boss : Yes, I didn't see you sharing knowledge on Purchasing domain.

Kumar : Why would I? Because I am not in Purchasing, I am in Manufacturing.

Big Boss : This is what I don't like about you. You give Excuse for everything.
Kumar : Huh? *Confused*

Big Boss : Next, you need to improve your communication skills.

Kumar : Like what? I am the one who trained the team on "Business Communication",
you sat in the audience and took Notes, you remember?

Big Boss : Oh is it? Errr...well..I mean, you need to improve Your Social Pragmatic Affirmative
communication.

Kumar : Huh? What the hell is that? *Confused*

Big Boss : See! That's why you need to learn about it.

Kumar : *head spinning*

Big Boss : Next, you need to sharpen your recruiting skills. All the guys you recruited left within
2 months.

Kumar : Well, not my mistake. You told them you will sit beside them and review their code,
and most resigned the Next day itself. Couple of them even attempted suicide.
Big Boss : *stunned* (recovers from shock) Err...anyway, I Tried to give you a better rating, but
our Normalization Process gave you only 'average'.

Kumar : Last year that process gave me 'excellent'. This year just 'average'? Why is this process
pushing me up and down Every year?

Big Boss : That's a complicated process. You don't want to hear.

Kumar : I'll try to understand. Go ahead.

Big Boss : Well, we gather in a large room, write down the Names of sub-ordinates in bits
of paper, and throw them up In the air. Whichever lands on the floor gets
average',Whichever lands on table gets 'good', whichever we manage to Catch gets
'excellent' and whichever gets stuck to ceiling Gets 'outstanding'.

Kumar : (eyes popping out) what? Ridiculous! So who gets 'poor' rating?

Big Boss : Those are the ones we forget to write down.

Kumar : What the hell! And how can paper bits stick to Ceiling for 'outstanding'?

Big Boss : Oh no, now you have started questioning our 20 Year old organizational process!

Kumar : *faints*

Track Your Lost Mobile Phone

2010-05-19T07:35:00.001-07:00

Here is an interesting fact to share.. Now a days each one of us carry Hi Fi Mobile devices and always fear that it may be stolen.

Each mobile carries a unique IMEI i.e International Mobile Identity No. which can be used to track your mobile anywhere in the world.
This is how it works!!!!!!

1. Dial *#06# from your mobile.

2.Your mobile shows a unique 15 digit.

3.Note down this no anywhere but except your mobile as this is the number which will help trace your mobile in case of a theft.

4.Once stolen you just have to mail this 15 digit IMEI no. to cop@vsnl.net

5.No need to go to police.

6.Your Mobile will be traced within next 24 hrs via a complex system of GPRS and internet..

7.You will find where your hand set is being operated even in case your number is being changed.

The boy should be promoted ??????? To which level ?????????

2010-05-18T01:29:00.000-07:00

A beautiful Madam was having trouble with one of her students in 1st Grade class. Madam asked,'Boy. What is your problem?'

Boy answered, 'I'm too smart for the first-grade. My sister is in the third-grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the 4th Grade!'

Madam had enough. She took the Boy to the principal's office. While the Boy waited in the outer office, madam explained to the principal what the situation was. The principal told Madam he would give the boy a test and if he failed to answer any of his

questions he was to go back to the first-grade and behave.She agreed.

The Boy was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test.

Principal: 'What is 3 x 3?'

Boy.: '9'.

Principal: 'What is 6 x 6?'

Boy.: '36'.

And so it went with every question the principal thought a 4th grade should know. The principal looks at Madam and tells her, 'I think Boy can go to the 4th grade.'

Madam says to the principal, 'I have some of my own questions.

Can I ask him ?' The principal and Boy both agreed.

Madam asks, 'What does a cow have four of that I have only two of'?

Boy, after a moment 'Legs.'

Madam: 'What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?'

Boy.: 'Pockets.'

Madam: What starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin whitish liquid?

Boy.: Coconut

Madam: What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft And sticky?

The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer, Boy was taking charge.

Boy..: Bubblegum

Madam: What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog does on three legs?

The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the answer...

Boy.: Shake hands

Madam: You stick your poles inside me. You tie me down to get me up. I get wet before you do.

Boy.: Tent

Madam: A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you're bored. The best man always has me first.

The Principal was looking restless, a bit tense and took one large Patiala Vodka peg.

Boy.: Wedding Ring

Madam: I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I drip. When you blow me, you feel good.

Boy.: Nose

Madam: I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I come with a quiver.

Boy.: Arrow

Madam: What word starts with a 'F' and ends in 'K' that means lot of heat and excitement?

Boy.: Fire truck

Madam: What word starts with a 'F' and ends in 'K' & if u don't get it, u have to use ur hand.

Boy.: Fork

Madam: What is it that all men have one of it's longer on some men than on others, the pope doesn't use his and a man gives it to his wife after they're married?

Boy.: SURNAME.

Madam: What part of the man has no bone but has muscles, has lots of veins, like pumping, & is responsible for making love ?

Boy.: HEART.

The principal breathed a sigh of relief and said to the teacher,

'Make this boy the PRINCIPAL, I got the last ten questions wrong myself!'.

Your Role Model

2010-05-14T00:58:00.001-07:00

Find out who truly is your Role Model - mine was Albert Einstein
DON'T SCROLL DOWN YET!!

FIRST, do the simple math below....
THEN, scroll down to find your hero.

It is truly remarkable just how accurate this is!
1) Pick your favorite number between 1 and 8
2) Multiply your choice by 3
3) Add 3
4) Multiply again by 3
5) You'll get a 2 digit number.....maybe 42, for example
6) Add the digits together. Example 4 and 2 = 6
Now Scroll down.

With that number, see who your ROLE MODEL is from the list below:

1. Albert Einstein

2. Oprah Winfrey

3. Mother Theresa

4. Ronald Reagan

5. Bill Gates

6. Gandhi

7. Eleanor Roosevelt

8. Babe Ruth

9. Sarada Prasad Pradhan

10.Winston Churchill

11. Barbara Walters

12. Dalai Lama

I know, I know....I just have that effect on people...One day you, too, can be like me.....Believe it!
P.S. Stop picking different numbers!! I AM YOUR IDOL, JUST DEAL WITH IT!!!!!!

Reality Of Research Scholar

2010-05-14T00:50:00.000-07:00

Gud to read

Once a man went to a Veterinary Doctor in India and said:

Doctor I have come on vacation for a month so that I can get myself treated fully within this period.

Doctor: I think you should go to the Doctor opposite to my clinic, see that board.

Man: No, Doctor, I have come to you only

Doctor: But, gentleman I am a Veterinary Doctor. I am an animal specialist. I do not treat human beings.

Man: I know, Doctor very well and that is why I have come to you only...

Doctor: I can not, because you speak like me, think like me, talk like me which means you are a human being and not an animal.

Man: I know I am a human but listen to my complaints first:

Doctor: OK. Tell me.

Man:
I sleep like dog thinking about my work load whole night.
I get up in the morning like a horse
I go to work running like a deer
I work all the day in my lab like a donkey
I keep on planning for new projects and thesis like a fox
I run around for 12 months like a bull without any holidays.
I wag my tail in front of all my scientists

Doctor: are you a Research Scholar?

Man: Yes !!

Doctor: Instead of telling this long history you should have told me in the beginning itself that you are a Research Scholar. Come man, no one can treat you better than me.

Research with love

2010-05-12T22:12:00.000-07:00

RESEARCH IS KNOWN TO BE FAVORITE OF MAD PEOPLE AND MAD PEOPLE ALWAYS USED TO BE IN LOVE. SO I BELIEVE "IF U HAVE TO BE A GOOD RESEARCHER FIRST BE A GOOD LOVER". IT WILL BE PLEASURE TO HAVE UR OPINION MENTION in comments.

THNX

Who AM I?

2010-05-12T21:50:00.000-07:00

Hey could not guess? It me , Sudhanshu. Doing my Ph.D in Nanoscience From India.

Have interests in Research,Friendship,Love,Chatting etc.

Be free to call and share ur research mind tension.

sudhanshu
sriyanshu@gmail.com

Anything you like to know about me feel free to ask me in comments.........see you soon.

Thnx