Being selfless could cost your loved ones dearly

Selflessness is a virtue, or so we are told. The truth is that selflessness can be a wonderful thing. However, when it becomes such a habit that we forget ourselves completely, it becomes pretty much a sin. Nobody ever said that you should habitually put yourself last to the extent that your own needs are never met. 

Do you recall when you were last on a plane and the Stewardess ran through the safety information. 

Well, I doubt you do because nobody really pays any attention to such things. Everybody is too busy reading the magazines, putting in their earphones or talking.

Well, perhaps they ought to pay more attention, because there is a gem hidden within all those hand signals and routines. Within that dull litany of instructions lies a lesson for us all – and particularly for mothers.

Sometimes it’s best for all if you put yourself first. Selfishness can sometimes be the best thing for all concerned

If the oxygen masks come down from the ceiling of the plane then the rule is simple. Mothers put THEIR mask on first and then attend to the children. It goes against every instinct but it’s the only way in which your children are going to survive in the event of an emergency.

Why? Well, if you fall unconscious due to a lack of oxygen, who is going to help the children. What may seem to be a selfish act is actually essential to everybody’s survival. Nobody survives unless mother puts herself first. 

You need to take care of yourself in order that you can continue to take care of others. There’s no use in driving yourself into ill-health and depression. Who will take care of your children when you can’t?

If that doesn’t convince you then consider this: your children are looking to you as a role model of what it is to be a woman (or man, but it’s mostly women to whom this post is directed). If you want your son growing up and treating women like skivvies then act like one yourself. It’s what he will come to expect from women. If you want your daughter to grow up to act like a drudge then model that behaviour.

If you don’t take care of yourself, you won’t be fit to take care of others for long

Imagine the following scenario. Such people arrive often. I meet a lovely new client. She puts her family and her husband first. Her own feelings? Well, they don’t matter so much and so she ignores them and stores them up. They can wait. She’s less important. The kids are always first priority.

The result? Well, I won’t go into details but it could be panic attacks, alcoholism, depression, comfort eating or any one of a number of different problems. You see, anxiety, stress, depression and the like won’t wait until you think it’s time to deal with them.

Let’s cut out the depression and simply imagine that the mother is stressed trying to juggle everybody else’s needs and demands. That alone, given time and sufficient self-neglect, could lead to psychological problems such as burn-out and an eventual breakdown.

Put yourself first before you become of no use to anybody!

The result? Well, it’s an unhappy mother who won’t be able to attend quite as well to her family’s needs as she otherwise would have done – if only she’d learned to put herself first – at least sometimes, a little, enough.

The world is full of people-pleasers and there is also a constant supply of people who are all too keen to take what they can get. People-pleasers have an ever-increasing supply of demands placed upon them and a finite amount of time and energy. Disaster awaits if nothing changes.

I help people to become just that little bit more selfish, so that they can become that little bit more selfless in turn. I help people to enjoy their lives once more, so they can be a joy to others. I help people to let go of the need to be a people-pleaser, so they can be less of a martyr and more of a positive role model to their children. I could help you to feel freer, happier and content.

Would you like to be happier and free to be yourself, to please yourself, to live?

Hypnotherapy can help people to retrain their minds. Hypnotherapy can help people to leave behind unwanted consequences of beliefs which do harm. You are important because your family couldn’t manage without you. Your car is important too. So is your boiler. You have them serviced and maintained. You’re no different. Look after yourself and if that seems difficult, let me show you how. 

If you’d like some help with this then please get in touch. You could call me on 07786123736 or email me via paul@resolvedhypnotherapy.co.uk.

Best wishes

HOME (Hypnotherapy Reading)

The post Selfishness can be altruistic. Find out how with Resolved! Hypnotherapy Reading appeared first on Resolved Hypnotherapy Reading, Wallingford, Oxford, Thame, Didcot.

Tinnitus, destroyer of lives! It’s a truly horrible condition and I’m sorry if you’re here, at your wits end, desperately search for a cure, a solution, and end to it.

I’m glad you’re here because there is a solution. I can’t promise a cure, because nobody can do that. What I can offer is a potential solution to the problems it causes. I could help you to get back to living your life without constant anxiety, depression and anger. You can learn to simply forget about it. Wouldn’t that be lovely!? 

Habituation is the process by which you become so accustomed to the sound of your tinnitus that you simply forget to pay it any attention. The sound is still there, you just don’t hear it. It may as well not be there.

It’s important to realise that freeing yourself from the anxiety and depression which, all too commonly, surrounds tinnitus is a process, not a goal. It’s a journey and not an event. There is no magical hypnotherapeutic collection of words which will free you. It is a process by which you retrain yourself to respond to the sound of tinnitus without the stress and anxiety.

What you stress about is taken as being very important by your brain. Your brain will therefore focus your attention upon the sound. You become hypersensitive and the noise seems louder. The louder the noise, the greater the stress. It’s a vicious and self-defeating circle. 

Perhaps you can recognise this vicious circle in your own experiences. 

Perhaps it’s time to do something about it, something different. Would you like to be shown the escape route?

Every week I use hypnotherapy in Reading, Oxford, London, Wallingford and Thame to help people habituate to the sound of their tinnitus. They’ve often suffered it for some months, others have suffered for years, and it becomes an all-consuming obsession.

They listen for it when it goes silent.

They let it ruin their lives. They keep an eternal watch for the sound and they allow it to drive them from activities which they once enjoyed and which gave their life meaning. “What’s the point of doing A, B or C if I can’t enjoy it anymore?” This is an understandable response but it’s also completely the wrong way to go about things. When you withdraw from things your life centres ever-increasingly around your tinnitus, for there’s less and less to distract you.

Tinnitus needn’t be allowed to beat you. You could learn to find different ways of putting that sound into perspective so that it bothers you less and so that it occupies less and less of your attention. This blog post will give you some tips with which you could learn to habituate to the sound.

What does habituating to tinnitus mean?

If you moved into a house near a motorway it might keep you awake for the first week, fortnight, month or so. Eventually, however, you’d grow used to the sound and it simply wouldn’t bother you anymore.

When you’re not bothered by a sound your brain will cease to see it as being a threat. When this happens your brain will begin to habituate. This means that your brain will simply stop bothering to make you consciously aware of the sound.

Your brain selects what you need to hear

Your body makes all kinds of sounds all of the time. Your surroundings generate all kinds of sounds all of the time. You rarely become aware of them, however, because they’re constant and because if you were aware of every sensory stimulus, all of the time, you’d be overwhelmed.

Are you aware of your feet? You are now I mentioned them but before that you’d not been aware. Your brain edits them out of your awareness because it’s simply not useful for you to be aware of them all of the time. You equally spend very little time being aware of the various parts of you which move as you breathe, the sound of your breathing or the feeling of the air moving through your nose. 

You can learn to have just as little awareness of the sound of your tinnitus.

Read more on how I work with tinnitus by clicking here

This is the aim of tinnitus habituation. The aim is to become so used to the sound that you simply forget to bother hearing it.

How can you begin to habituate?

1

White noise generators can be expensive and they’re not given out by every health authority. You can download such things from the internet and you could substitute birdsong, radio 4, pleasant music etc for the hiss of white noise. The key thing, however, is to ensure that you can hear the tinnitus over the sound.

Don’t be tempted to drown it out. Keep the volume the same at all times. Over time you will hear the tinnitus over this noise less and less. That’s when you turn the volume of the masking sound down and continue habituating.

2

If you have become depressed and anxious because of tinnitus then you may find yourself stopping those activities which you used to enjoy. DON’T! Even if they fail to give as much pleasure as they used to, get back into doing them. It doesn’t matter if you ‘don’t feel like it’. Keep busy! All of my tinnitus clients have found that keeping busy distracts from the tinnitus and assists in habituation.

If you are depressed then you’re likely to be beating yourself up for not being able to do all the things you used to do. Stop that immediately. One of the indicators of depression is this sense of reduced capacity. The more you beat yourself up the worse you feel. The worse you feel, the less you’ll do.

Push yourself back into the world through taking tiny steps at a time. Push yourself but keep ambitions small and praise yourself for each achievement – no matter how small they seem.

3

Don’t be tempted to find those silent places. It’ll just accentuate the tinnitus further. Stay in places which stimulate the ears and other sensory organs.

4

Listen to this recording once per day (never whilst driving) 

It will encourage you to focus on other senses. It will encourage you to stop focusing solely on that sound in your ears. It will encourage you to leave thoughts and feelings to come and go without your becoming entangled in them, without allowing them to descend into a spiral of negativity, anxiety and depression.

When you’re not listening to the recording continue to use all of your senses, dipping back into emotions and thoughts and viewing them impartially. More importantly, learn to use these techniques to view that sound impartially. When you manage this the process of habituation can begin.

5

Tinnitus needn’t be seen as some alien, hostile and intrusive force of nature. Give it a name. Give it a cartoon-like image. Talk to it in its quieter times. Greet it with the pretense of affection. Every time you respond to it with fear it merely reinforces the problem. Respond to it differently, even if it feels pretend and fake. It does become easier over time. As you change your response you will begin to make the other interventions a little bit easier.

6

Relax! Easier said than done, I know, but do what you can. Anxiety raises blood pressure and this only makes tinnitus worse.

7

If it goes away for a while please DO NOT go and listen for it. Do something pleasurable instead. The more you focus on it, the worse it will get.

8

Watch out for certain foods / drinks which cause spikes in your tinnitus. Alcohol and caffeine are common ones. Avoid them if it proves to be true for you.

9

Read up about tinnitus. Understanding the process of habituation will help you. Some people find the various tinnitus forums helpful as sources of support and advice. Others find that they hard wire anxiety and negativity about the future. Your choice. 

10

Seek help with this process before you do become so depressed and anxious that the job is made still more difficult. See your GP, get referred to your local audiology department. Find a therapist who knows something about tnnitus and the process of TRT.

Don’t fall for any therapist sites who tell you they can cure tinnitus or make it disappear. They can’t. Nobody can. You can be helped to not hear it any longer and, when you do hear it, to be completely unbothered. That will prove to be enough, believe me.

11

Finally, please don’t become a regular reader of tinnitus website fora. I have looked through one forum after another and whilst they can offer some good advice, empathy and an understanding ear, they all too often become home to negative and bitter individuals who have become fixed on the idea that nothing works.

Nothing has worked for them and so it simply will never work for anybody. I can only guess at the process these people have gone through in order to become so angrily resentful but the effect is demotivating, depressing and instills nothing but fear and learned helplessness.

I do understand how destructive tinnitus can be but there is a solution What I offer is supported by audiology clinics in Oxford. I receive informal referrals from these departments (‘take a look at this mans website!’) because they seem to understand that what I offer is not a magical panacea but, instead, a process through which habituation can take place. 

Give me a call to find out more!

I have used hypnotherapy in Reading, Oxford , Wallingford and Thame to help many people habituate to the sound of tinnitus and it has always been easiest when it hasn’t been left to fester for months on end. If you find yourself reacting negatively to tinnitus you should act quickly before depression and anxiety disorders have a chance to set in.

You could call me for more information on 07786 123736, email me at paul@resolvedhypnotherapy.co.uk or use the contact form below. I look forward to hearing from you.

Best wishes

Contact me here!

Hello. Just fill in this form and your message will come to me via email. I'll then email you back as soon as possible. If you'd prefer me to call you then simply let me know in your message. Don't forget to provide a number if this is the case. Best wishes. Paul

---

Your Name:*

Subject:*

Message:*

E-mail:*

SubmitReset

Type the characters you see here:

* Indicates required fields

The post Helpful tips to keep tinnitus at bay. You can beat it! appeared first on Resolved Hypnotherapy Reading, Wallingford, Oxford, Thame, Didcot.

I was recently waiting for a train in Reading and overheard a girl talking on the ‘phone nearby. She was plainly a little drunk and was seemingly begging some boy to take her back into his life. It didn’t go well. The begging became more insistent, the crying louder and then she snapped. She broke into a torrent of pure rage. The phone call ended with a scream of ‘I hate you!’ 

Ouch! hatred is such a destructive emotion. It’s aggression without satisfaction and the adrenaline and cortisol emitted as a consequence of the feeling is damaging to the body, psyche and, if you like such concepts, the soul.

I use hypnotherapy in Reading, Oxford, London (Holborn), Thame and Wallingford in order to help people overcome their hatred for another person. Occasionally I have helped people overcome their hatred for other races, sexualities and more.

Hatred is like drinking a bottle of poison and hoping that somebody else will die

I hope that poor girl gets over that boy and doesn’t nurture this hatred. It can never do anybody any good. We can’t all like everybody but sometimes a dislike for someone can come to be more intense than is reasonable.

Jung believed that there is a part of ourselves which we fear and dislike. We see this “shadow in those we dislike the most.” 

If you ever find that you spend too much time nurturing a hatred for someone else it could be because their disliked qualities somehow remind you of something in yourself.

I’m not sure I buy this in its entirety but an all-consuming hatred for another person is certainly a sign that something isn’t right. It’s usually what happens when the object of our hatred simply won’t love us enough.

Sometimes hatred feels better than grief.

Sometimes hatred is love mixed with anger. Anger always feels more powerful than grief or sadness. Hatred is closer to love than many people realise. 

Surely the ideal things is to end up feeling indifferent towards those who have wronged you. Hatred means that they still have power over you. They can cause you to feel something, after all. Stop allowing such people to cause you any kind of feeling whatsoever. Indifference means you are free. 

Does hating that person make you any happier? 

The more you come to be at peace with yourself the more tolerant you become of the shortcomings of others. That tendency to leap to an irrationally strong dislike of others could be left behind you and you’ll find the world a much nicer place in which to live as a result. Let that hatred go and be free!

Perhaps your hatred originates in something they actually did

Now, of course, perhaps this hatred of a person is down to some hurtful action on their part. Perhaps they’re a past lover who left you.

Perhaps it’s a parent who didn’t treat you as you deserved to be treated. Perhaps it’s a colleague who stuffed your promotion or a friend who somehow betrayed you. It might be a relative you feel has betrayed you. There might be all kinds of valid reasons to be feeling hatred towards this person. 

It doesn’t really matter what or who caused that feeling. It doesn’t bring any benefits. It’s not helping you and it isn’t making your life any better.

It’s just a bunch of chemicals making your body unhappy and your mind a darker and less fun a place to live within.

I do understand how it feels. I’ve been there too. Nothing good came of it. I learned to let it go. Hypnotherapy could help you to do the same thing too. I’ll be more than glad to help you.

Indifference is your goal. Your goal is for that person to be unable to bring you to feel anything at all. When you feel nothing for a person they have no power over you. So, let’s work together in order to help you to let go of a hatred which is only hurting you.

Only then will you be free.

Only then will you be able to pursue happiness.

Victory lies in simply not caring anymore

I commonly see clients who tell me that they simply don’t care about a certain person in their life. They do care, however, very deeply. Nearly every time I hear these words the person’s smile disappears, their faces stiffening as they bury their true feelings behind a wall of ‘not caring’.

These people still had power over them – the power to make them hate. Victory lies in letting go of that emotion so that any thought of the person concerned simply fails to evoke any emotional response whatsoever.

Wouldn’t you just like to move on?

Victory over the people we hate is achieved when we stop giving them the power to make us hate them. Victory is overcoming the hurt they caused us, so that we have no reason to be affected by their existence.

Peace lies in feeling so good about our own selves that they simply don’t matter anymore and we forget about the concept of victory altogether.

We have every right to feel aggrieved when we’re hurt by people whom we should have been able to trust. Nonetheless, if you’re reading this because you’re continuing to suffer due to anger and hatred, now could be the time for you to let it all go. 

Perhaps letting it go might include recognising that you do care. For instance, children will probably always love their parents on some level, no matter how awful they are / were. Coming to be in a state of peace with that fact may seem impossible but,  in truth, it’s no more than very difficult. You could manage it. I could help you.

Letting it go will leave you free to enjoy your life, free of that poison. Letting it go will help you to move on and find happiness elsewhere.

Begin a new life, today

Now could be the first day of the rest of your life, a life in which you can enjoy everything free of the pain. Now could be the time in which you mend that part of you which somehow feels unworthy of having been treated better.

Hatred of a person for a past hurt can only continue in a person whose self-esteem is insecure enough to have been damaged by the experience. Repair the damage and set yourself free!

I have used hypnotherapy in Reading, London, Thame, Wallingford and Oxford to help people free themselves from destructive emotions.

Perhaps you could be the next. It’s worth the price of a ‘phone call to find out, isn’t it? You could call me on 07786 123736, email me at paul@resolvedhypnotherapy.co.uk or simply use the contact form below.

Be at peace with both yourself and those around you through Resolved! Hypnotherapy!

Best wishes

Contact me here!

Hello. Just fill in this form and your message will come to me via email. I'll then email you back as soon as possible. If you'd prefer me to call you then simply let me know in your message. Don't forget to provide a number if this is the case. Best wishes. Paul

---

Your Name:*

Subject:*

Message:*

E-mail:*

SubmitReset

Type the characters you see here:

* Indicates required fields

(HOME)

The post Hatred only hurts YOU! Let it go with hypnotherapy appeared first on Resolved Hypnotherapy Reading, Wallingford, Oxford, Thame, Didcot.

Hello

Are you suffering from an intolerance of everyday sounds? Does the sound of the neighbours drive you mad? Are you driven insane by the sound of people chewing their food, the noise of a hoover, the ringing of church bells or dogs barking? Do such noises cause physical pain, either at the time of a day or so later?

If so then it’s possible that you suffer from hyperacusis – an extraordinary sensitivity to sounds which other people will often fail to even notice.

I use hypnotherapy in Reading, Oxford, London, Thame and Wallingford for hyperacusis to help people like you to become desensitised to these noises. I could also see you over zoom or whatsapp if this is easier for you.

I’ve used hypnotherapy to help people to simply get on with their lives, in order that they can stop focusing so heavily on these sounds, in order that their brains can simply begin to habituate to the sounds which once threatened to drive them mad.

You don’t have to live the rest of your life suffering from this condition. Hypnotherapy, combined with other approaches, could help you to be free from the problem, for good.

Read on to learn how I could help you to be free of this problem, once and for all.

Get in touch if you’d like to find out more.

How?

I help them to lose the anger, anxiety, pain and distress at the appearance of such sounds. If you live in or around London, Reading, Oxford, Thame or Wallingford then hypnotherapy could help you too.

Please make sure that you’ve consulted your GP before calling for hypnotherapy. They’ll run a few tests just to confirm that there’s nothing physically wrong with your ears. Assuming there isn’t then it’s all a matter of adjusting your psychological responses to those sounds which bother you. I can help you with that.

The following story has had pertinent details changed so as to preserve confidentiality. However, the gist of it remains true.

I have just seen a man who developed hyperacusis after an accident. The sensitivity to noise became so great that he withdrew from social functions and from life in general.

In our second session he described how the approaches we worked upon had reduced his sensitivity by at least 50%. Fifty percent in one session! That’s not bad going at all! If you’d like to experience the same lessening of symptoms then please do get in touch. Id be more that glad to help you.

What are the causes of hyperacusis?

Hyperacusis can be caused by a number of issues. Sometimes post-head injury syndrome can cause the problem, as can Bells Palsy, Migraines, Williams’ Syndrome and Lyme Disease. 

Sometimes stress can co-incide with the arrival of a certain noise and the two become inextricably linked.

Sometimes people with asperger’s or high-functionisg autism can suffer such sensory issues too.

Whatever the cause may be, you’ve become over-sensitive to certain noises and you’ll need to learn how to respond differently in order to escape the problem and restore your life to normality. When you reduce your emotional responses to the sounds and to any pain which they cause, your brain learns, over time, to cease bringing the sounds to your attention quite so much. Over time you become habituated to the sounds so that you might not even consciously hear them at all.

I once worked with a lady who had badly hurt her head in a sporting accident. Her head injury brought on the condition she came to identify as being hyperacusis.

Through our work together she came to see that the sound which had once bothered her no longer had to trouble her. 

Hyperacusis is not something you have to suffer forever. It is a condition, a problem. It can and will be overcome.

Hypnotherapy can help you to achieve the same goal. It has done so for others and there’s no reason why you couldn’t do it too.

How can hypnotherapy help you to habituate to the sounds associated with hyperacusis?

Coming to terms with hyperacusis is akin to coming to terms with tinnitus. The more you become stressed at the sound, the more you focus upon it, the more you begin to fear its appearance the worse it will become.

I help people to observe the sounds impartially so that the stress response fades. I help them to resolve any underlying anxieties. I help them to focus upon other, more pleasant, stimuli so that the offending sound begins to fade from awareness. 

I’ve used hypnotherapy in London, Reading, Oxford, Wallingford and Thame to help people become better at managing their response to this noise. If you’re fed up with noises which cause you stress then please do consider getting in touch. I’d be glad to talk with you.

You can get your life back

I could help you to be able to go to bed without straining your ears to listen for the kids next door. I could help you to enjoy your garden without worrying about whether or not the neighbours’ dog will begin howling. I could help you to enjoy life once more.

Other people have managed to leave their hyperacusis behind them. You can too.

You could contact me on 07786 123736. If you’d rather then you can also email me at paul@resolvedhypnotherapy.co.uk or use the contact form below.

Best wishes

Contact me here!

Hello. Just fill in this form and your message will come to me via email. I'll then email you back as soon as possible. If you'd prefer me to call you then simply let me know in your message. Don't forget to provide a number if this is the case. Best wishes. Paul

---

Your Name:*

Subject:*

Message:*

E-mail:*

SubmitReset

Type the characters you see here:

* Indicates required fields

The post Hyperacusis and how hypnotherapy could help appeared first on Resolved Hypnotherapy Reading, Wallingford, Oxford, Thame, Didcot.

The different varieties of hypno gastric band once promised to revolutionise approaches to weight loss in this country. What happened?

Hello. If you’re looking for hypnotherapy in Reading, London, Oxford, Wallingford or Thame and are looking to lose some weight, to be slimmer, happier and healthier, have a read of this post before choosing a hypnotherapist.

Today we’re obsessed with the idea of weight loss jabs. Millions of people are now spending hundreds of pounds per month on the promise of easy weight-loss. All you have to do is pay the fee and the weight will just fall away without any effort whatsoever. However, I am now receiving calls from people who have no wish to continue with such jabs. The side effects are too great for some people. The fees are too high for some people. The appetite just returns with a vengeance once the jabs stop. I think that these jabs will one day go the same way as the hypno-band. Perhaps then, at least for a while, people will realise that they have to change if their weight is to change.

This hypno-band is now largely of historic interest. It stands as testament to the fact that there is no quick fix to obesity and no short cut to weight loss. There is only the next big fad or the thorough, lasting work to be done.

So what was it all about?

I remember reading about the hypno-band, in a news-paper back in about 2010. It was one of those things which caught my interest as I trained to become a hypnotherapist. It sounded amazing, to my untrained ears, and promised fast and effective solutions. I was all into those back then. I was rather impatient as a younger man.

The hypno-band approach featured the use of hypnosis to bring the unconscious mind to believe that the client’s body had undergone a gastric band operation. The stomach would then be unable to accept excessive quantities of food and the client would begin to lose weight, fast.

What a wonderful idea!

Everyone was jumping on the bandwagon and everybody seemed to be singing its praises. The person who had developed the approach carved the nation into geographical areas and sold one licence per area. Who would want to miss out on the opportunity to be Reading’s only hyno-band practitioner. Furthermore, if it was the real deal, who could afford to miss such an opportunity?

It was commercially successful. It promised to be the perfect solution to that great big obesity problem which was just beginning to hit the headlines at that time…

Everybody wants a quick fix!

Before hypnotherapists invented this ‘solution,’ the answer to a weight problem rested with will-power, any number of diets or a serious operation. Once will-power and diets had been tried, who wouldn’t choose the hypno-gastric band when faced with the steely alternative of the surgeon’s knife? Hypnotherapy might work but the hypno gastric band was the short-cut to end all short-cuts.

Clients began calling to ask if I offered the treatment. Everybody wanted a slice of this pie!

I chose to investigate the most popular varieties of hypno-gastric bands. I thought it might be useful to undertake the training in order to learn from those who had invented a very successful (in a commercial sense) product. I had my doubts as to its worth (as will be explained below) but thought that I would give the concept a hearing. A few hundred quid and a weekend of training in the company of fellow hypnotherapists? Why not? 

A bunch of scripts and a couple of CDs

Well, I contacted the inventor of the field’s most prominent product and enquired as to how I might enrol.  The Reading area was full, I was informed. There was no room for another practitioner in the local area.

Berkshire was completely packed out with people who had bought their own patch of territory. In your patch you’d be the only person authorised to use this product. It was the same for Oxford and Wallingford. I was too late.

What a great piece of marketing it was. Buy your own patch or someone else will! There was a scramble to be the area’s weight loss expert! 

I then contacted a hypnotherapist acquaintance whom I knew had had the training. I asked him for details of the course: how much it cost and how long it took. “Oh,” he said, “it’s a bargain. There’s no course. You pay a hundred quid and they send you some CDs and a bunch of scripts.”

That hypnotherapist has shut up shop during the course of the covid 19 crisis. Perhaps he fell for the hype of such approaches, continued to use them and so failed to build up a source of referrals from genuinely satisfied clients.

You see, it’s easy to lose weight. Pretty much every overweight person has gone on a diet and met their target weight loss. It’s easy to lose weight. The real problem lies in keeping it gone.

Effective therapy doesn’t come from a script

Anybody qualified as a hypnotherapist can apply for such a course and they needn’t ever attend a single lecture on how to apply it. They bung the provider a hundred pounds and are sent scripts which are then read to those who are prepared to spend £375+ for a course of hypnotherapy.

Hypnotherapy is an unregulated profession. This means that any number of people can create a course and produce a hypnotherapist. There is no national standard for hypnotherapists.

I personally think it’s a scandal. I have nothing but scorn for those who deliberately choose a quick and lightweight course, thinking that they will be ready, in any shape or form, for the challenges which working with mental health issues will present.

Clients deserve a therapist with the best possible training, They deserve a therapist who is ready and able to help client to reach real solutions. They deserve therapists who have had enough personal-therapy to be self-aware.

Such therapists aren’t to be found coming out of courses which last all of a few weekends. They don’t pay a few hundred quid for useless scripts.

The NCHP, with whom I trained, presses for regulation of hypnotherapy precisely because they know that their courses merit UKCP accreditation. This means that their courses would satisfy those who may one day regulate the profession.

You deserve better!

I believe that you deserve better because you really, really do. Hypnotherapy isn’t cheap and so it needs to be worth the investment.

Click here to read my main page on how hypnotherapy could help you lose weight

Anybody can read a script. Hypnotising somebody isn’t difficult. I could teach you how in twenty minutes. You already know how to hypnotise yourself, most people do it all the time. What is more demanding is the skill of using psychotherapy and hypno-psychotherapy in order to get to the bottom of the issue and to tailor each hypno-therapeutic intervention to the needs and uniqueness of every single client.

Every client is different and no one script can hope to tailor to every individual circumstance, need and personality.

You’re unique. The reasons for your weight-gain are unique. The solution will have to be unique too!

If you’re reading this post because you’re currently overweight, let me ask you one question:  why did you first begin to eat more calories than you used? If a thousand people chose to email me with their answers to this question, I would have a thousand different and unique responses.

Could a script, costing one hundred pounds, cover them all?

Hypnotherapy works at its best when practised by psychotherapists who are able to get to the bottom of the issues which every unique client brings to them. Clients achieve the best results when a skilled hypno-psychotherapist assists them in mastering their own issues and difficulties.

Weight-loss is all about taking control, accepting responsibility and understanding that we can ALL determine our own futures.

Weight-loss requires resolving those issues which lie behind its gain.

Hypnotherapy accelerates the process by which psychotherapy helps clients to achieve their goals. It is not magic and it is not a short cut.

If you’re serious about both losing weight and keeping it off then I may be the person to help you.

Take control, don’t give it away to some imaginary band!

The different varieties of hypno gastric-bands effectively told people that they can’t exercise control, that a hypnotherapist needs to take control, that you need to be led to believe in the power of an illusory belt around your stomach. It’s a quick-fix, it’s a cop-out and it’s a refusal to accept that people already possesses every strength they need with which to achieve their goals. If the client can’t see it, yet, it’s our job to show them.

And so, I never chose to offer any form of hypno gastric-band in Resolved! Hypnotherapy. Short cuts bring short-term gains. If you’re paying for hypnotherapy in order to lose weight then why not pay for effective solutions? You’ve already tried the diet which promises the world and delivers nothing, right?

What happened to the hypno-band?

Nobody talks about the hypno-band anymore. When hypnotherapists discuss approaches to helping their clients to lose weight it never comes up in conversation. I haven’t heard anybody mention it for years now. It has been left to rot and joins the long list of wonder cures which promised great things and delivered just the same old disappointments.

Someone became rich through selling it. Good luck to them. It doesn’t seem, however, to have become the standard treatment for obesity. If it had been as effective as it promised then it would have been NICE approved by now.

The lesson is clear. If you put your trust in the newest fad then you’re at risk of losing your money. Getting to work on sustainable approaches which put YOU in charge is the long term solution to slimming and to every other psychological problem too.

Why place your trust in yet another short-cut when the long term solution is just a ‘phone call away? Contact me here for more details or simply use the form below. 

Contact me here!

Hello. Just fill in this form and your message will come to me via email. I'll then email you back as soon as possible. If you'd prefer me to call you then simply let me know in your message. Don't forget to provide a number if this is the case. Best wishes. Paul

---

Your Name:*

Subject:*

Message:*

E-mail:*

SubmitReset

Type the characters you see here:

* Indicates required fields

(HOME)

The post Hypno Gastric Bands, Weight loss, hypnotherapy and psychotherapy appeared first on Resolved Hypnotherapy Reading, Wallingford, Oxford, Thame, Didcot.

How good is your brain at seeing what’s really going on? Watch the video and find out!

Our brains are very good at seeing what they believe they should see but they’re not always  so great at seeing what’s actually there.

If you watch the video you’ll notice that you can’t help slipping back into ‘seeing’ whole people where there are only halves. You know that this is simply a clever example of someone taking advantage of default human perceptual mechanisms but you won’t be able to help it. It’s how our brains work. 

It’s simply unrealistic for our brains to consciously consider every piece of information received every minute of the day. Our brains thus seek patterns and when we see something which represents a part of a familiar pattern, our brains merely join the dots and fill the gaps. This saves time and perhaps thus saves our lives, when faced with danger. This is how this particular illusion works. 

But why do we see faces in clouds?

The brain can’t bear chaos. It’s like a Sergeant with OCD. It demands that things take an orderly shape. So when we see an example of randomness our brains scramble to make sense of it. it’s  a process called ‘pareidolia’ and is one of the most interesting concepts in psychology, in my opinion.

It could save your life one day. How else would you spot that leopard in the grass? Your brain seeks to identify patterns even when they’re not there. That’s why arachnophobes jump out of their skins when they see a black smudge on a wall out of the corner of an eye. It’s much safer to jump at a smudge and to find that it’s not a poisonous spider than it would be to fail to react and thus be bitten.

Pareidolia is a fantastic thing but it hasn’t always worked in my favour. I once attempted to demonstrate the effects of pareidolia in a presentation, utilising all manner of phallic innuendo: visual, verbal and so on. I carefully explained the process through which they turned my innocent use of a banana and squirty cream into a phallic object and a sexual ‘event’ and still a handful of them voted me down. Bah! More fool them! They prove my next point.

(Others loved that presentation, by the way. I had to say it. I have never given a presentation which resulted in such a polarisation of feedback. tens out of tens galore. Ones too )

Believe what you want to believe! See what you want to see!

The tube is going both ways!

Oh no it’s not, it’s only going in one direction. Say what you like, only one direction of travel is actually taking place.

However, some people spend their entire lives telling themselves that their perception is unalterably true. Those people who come to see me for hypnotherapy in Reading, Wallingford, Oxford, London and Thame spend their lives like this.

They see the world in their unique way and it either works for them or they adapt their lives in order to live around the distortion.

An agoraphobe may, therefore, build a life lived entirely indoors, safe from the outside world. The outside world is scary and impossibly dangerous, after all. For as long as that way of living remains tenable, the illusion stays unchallenged and, indeed, strengthens over time. In order to free themselves the illusion has to be unmasked and the sufferer ready for it to be dispelled.

Whatever you see, it’s certainly not reality. There’s no such thing

We all have individual lives, pasts and personalities. We’ve all learned to see the world in a certain way. Vision doesn’t take place in the eyes but in the brain. The brain has to interpret the visual signals sent by the eyes and these interpretations are open to error. Some people see the world as beautiful. Some people see it as dark, menacing and brutal.

Whatever we believe, confirmation bias works to help us maintain our belief. We will screen out conflicting information and focus upon that which confirms our beliefs as true. Most of this will be done unconsciously. We never even notice that there are different ways of seeing things.

Sometimes, however, we do notice that something is wrong but we just can’t work out what it is. Look at the following picture:

As you look at this picture your brain keeps trying to make sense of it. You may, at times, think you’ve resolved it, only to find that certainty disappears. Hang on a minute…

There’s no answer to this drawing. We want it to be a coherent shape but it can never be. Why should it have to be? You see what appears to be a triad of cylinders emerging from a three dimensional rectangular object and demand that they conform to your expectations. Why should they? You’re the problem, not the drawing.

My clients will frequently come to me when they tire of trying to square this circle. Their perception of the world no longer works, the way they see themselves becomes too painful. Their way of life becomes too hard and they want to change. They simply don’t know how, yet.

Cats see in black and white. Bats have little sight and see by ultrasound. Bees see using ultraviolet light. I am a touch short sighted. I don’t wear glasses unless I’m driving because I quite like my world a little bit fuzzy. None of us see the world as it really is. When our distorted view of things  becomes too costly, we could all use a little help in order to change.

Your mind doesn’t see everything as it truly is. We see what we look for

The very act of picking up that ‘phone is an instance of change. Why pick it up if there’s no hope, if you really are as hopeless as you’ve always thought?

No, the act of picking up a ‘phone or sending me an email is an admission that you have things all wrong – that there is a different way of seeing things. You’re now seeking help in order to find it. 

Hypnotherapy is great at helping us to change our view of things. Hypnotherapy helps people to see that they could think, feel and behave differently.

Hypnotherapy helps to access those parts of the mind which we have spent a lifetime in programming to see things in a distorted fashion. You can change how you see yourself. You can change how you think, feel and behave. Hypnotherapy can help you.

We live but once and we can put up with anxiety and depression, if we choose, or we could do something active in order to free ourselves from their grasp.

You decide. If you do nothing different then everything either stays the same or worsens. It’s time to do something different. Give me a call and we’ll discuss whether or not I feel able to help you. Refuse to call and perhaps you’ll always wonder.

What will it be like to adjust the way in which you experience your world? Watch this video to find out.

This video of people seeing colour for the first time is really quite moving. Many of my clients feel similarly shocked when they manage to change how they see their own selves. When they manage this there’s nothing else for it. Their behaviours, feelings and thought patterns change too.

Others have done it. How about it? Call on 07786123736. Email me at paul@resolvedhypnotherapy.co.uk or use the contact form in the footer of this page.

You could make changes to your too! Give me a call if you live in London, Reading, Oxford , Wallingford or Thame and could do with seeing things differently.

Best wishes

HOME

Hypnotherapy Reading, Berkshire. Hypnotherapy Oxfordshire.

Resolved! Hypnotherapy Reading offers hypnotherapy and hypno-psychotherapy in Reading, Oxford, Didcot, Wallingford, Pangbourne, Henley, Thame, Wokingham, Long Crendon, Chinnor, Haddenham, Wheatley, and in all surrounding areas of Berkshire and Oxfordshire. Hypnotherapy, in the hands of a skilled and ethical hypnotherapist, can help you to make those changes to your life which you’d like to see. Home visits are available on request.

The post How we see things and how they are: Perception and how we use it appeared first on Resolved Hypnotherapy Reading, Wallingford, Oxford, Thame, Didcot.

It doesn’t sound like much of a holiday, does it?

If you don’t stop it then your mind and body will force you!

I use hypnotherapy every week in order to help women to realise that they can’t just keep on giving. At some point they have to put themselves first. For my clients, of course, they’ve already pushed themselves too far.

They’ve already found that giving and giving and giving only leads to depression, anxiety, resentment, bitterness and a whole unhealthy host of possible coping mechanisms.

You can’t put yourself last forever and expect to get away with it. Sometimes you have to be selfish in order to continue being able to give. It sounds a contradiction but it isn’t. Its essential.

Do you find yourself drinking too much? Have you gone back to smoking? Comfort eating? Are you finding that each day seems an increasingly heavy burden? Do you sometimes just wish that you could retreat under the duvet and leave the whole world to sort itself out?

If so then you’re in danger of becoming yet another victim of people-pleasing perfectionism. It’s time for you to give yourself a break, to let go of those crucifyingly onerous expectations and to rediscover your own self. 

If you don’t then anxiety, depression and a whole Santa’s sackful of other problems are heading your way!

Yes, it’s difficult! Why can’t you just cope?!

All the Christmas adverts bombard us with images of perfect meals, ecstatically happy children and perfectly functioning couples. Families gather warmly around a perfectly roasted turkey and everything is just going swimmingly. 

There’s no medal for being Wonder-Woman!

I’m afraid it’s highly likely that nobody will even notice. People get used to getting, to receiving and are generally too wrapped up in their own lives to notice that you’re running yourself ragged.

If the demands of Christmas, on top of all the usual responsibilities, are driving you to the edge and beyond, it’s going to be up to you to row back and rethink. Only you can make those changes happen.

These habits of putting everybody else above your own basic needs can creep up on you. Sometimes they’re a product of our past. Some people spend a lifetime trying to emulate a perfect mother. Some people learned to please, please, please in order to placate a difficult parent. 

This doesn’t mean that you have to become selfish, uncaring, a bad mother, employee or wife. It simply entails rebuilding your own sense of self, your own identity. It means rediscovering YOU!

Your family and employer needs YOU, not some exhausted, wreck of a human being. If this means saying ‘NO!’ a little more often, if it means asking for help a little more willingly, if it means letting go of the past then you can do it! Hypnotherapy could help you!

Every week I use hypnotherapy in Reading, Oxford, London, Wallingford and Thame in order to help women to rediscover themselves, to rebalance their lives and to be happier, healthier and more fulfilled individuals.

You’ll love it and your family will thank you for simply allowing yourself to be you!

Let’s make 2027 a better year. Give me a call and we can get started!

Oh, and I wish you a Merry Christmas!

The post Don’t Just Give This Christmas. Take Something Back! appeared first on Resolved Hypnotherapy Reading, Wallingford, Oxford, Thame, Didcot.

It’s so easy to be a people pleaser. All you have to do is squash yourself into such a small space that your needs go unseen, unheard and unmet. For many people the art of saying ‘no’ is a difficult one. For many people the art of demanding things for yourself feels impossible. Saying ‘no’ and putting yourself first is the act of a bad person. We must be good and put everybody else first, all of the time, even if it kills us.

The problem is that it just might kill you. Failing that it might just lead you down into depression. At the very least you risk running out of time and realising that you never invested enough effort into your own life, dreams and ambitions.

Perhaps it’s time to redress the balance a little. Perhaps it’s time to say ‘no’ a little more often. Hypnotherapy could help you to be better at this. Hypnotherapy could make you stronger, happier whilst still leaving you a good person.

There’s a whole bunch of people who know this to be the case. I’ve used hypnotherapy for assertiveness in Oxford, Reading, London (Holborn), Wallingford and Thame in order to help people put themselves a little closer to the front of the queue. They did it and so could you.

What’ll happen if you refuse?

We’ve all seen it on a soap opera at some stage – the man collapsing of a heart attack as a result of stress. It’s one of those cliff-hanger classics.

We all, therefore, accept that stress can cause ill-health but none of us think that something quite so dramatic will happen to us.

Well, these things do happen. I have worked with enough clients to know that stress and anxiety can have dramatic and sudden consequences upon the body.

I have had clients who brought themselves to the point of collapse from various illnesses because they allowed stress to continue at too high a level for too long.

I have used hypnotherapy in Reading, Oxford, London, Wallingford and Thame to help people who simply thought they could carry on being stressed forever.

They learned, instead, to be self-assertive. They learned to stop putting themselves into the role of eternal victim. They learned to take back control. 

People tend to neglect the needs of their bodies, as if they are something separate, an appendage, something to carry around with us. And if we should ever concede that we need to take action to stay healthy then we are likely to satisfy ourselves by watching our diets and joining a gym.

You can’t ignore stress forever. Here’s why!

Stress, however,  is seen as something to be endured, ignored. The modern world will accept nothing less and we simply need to keep going, performing, progressing.

Putting yourself last will inevitably come to be a source of stress, resentment and worse. In time you’ll collapse under the strain because nobody can pour anything from an empty cup.

Give yourself a break. Rediscover that you have a self. You’re not just mum, wife, daughter, son. You’re a person and you have needs. Ignore those needs at your peril. Eventually you’ll be no good to yourself and no good to anybody else either.

Life is balance. If you’re out of sorts, rediscover your sense of balance.

Learn to say “NO!”

At some point we will have to learn to say “no.” Saying no to a boss or to those demands we place upon ourselves is daunting but we don’t only have heart attacks to fear.

Do you ever wonder why your healthy lifestyle doesn’t prevent you catching frequent colds, flu and the mystery bugs which lay us low for a week or more?

What about your relationships outside of work? Are you always the ‘yes’ person, the one to lean on when things get tough, the chef, the maid, the lover, taxi-driver, cleaner, mother and more?

Stress is trying to tell you something

How many women have I worked with who soldier on in these roles, never taking time to give any thought to their own selves? Well, that stress is trying to tell you something and you’d best listen up before all that cortisol and adrenaline forces you to do so.

Women, in particular, are prone to becoming people pleasers, putting others before themselves. There are times when this is a lovely trait, even a vital one. It can’t, however, be the default. You have needs too and if they’re unmet then everybody suffers in the end.

You ARE important! Your needs DO matter! Make the world sit up and notice

As a teacher most of my time was spent dealing with the rowdy and the self-confidently assertive. In the middle sat all the others who just quietly got on with life. They didn’t ask and the danger was that they wouldn’t get.

I had a duty to ensure that these students were well-served. Your boss doesn’t have this duty. Your colleagues don’t. Friends don’t either. If you’re happy to go through life asking for nothing and giving everything then there will be about 7 billion people who’ll let you.

Hypnotherapy could help you to be more assertive.

It’s time you began to think of yourself and acted accordingly.

If you don’t then your mental and physical health will suffer.

Don’t be one of those yummy mummies who takes to drink because the strain of being the perfect mother, wife and employee drags her under. You can’t economise on self care and not suffer the consequences. I’ve seen plenty of such mothers and they’re a sad sight. Such lovely people reduced to such depressed and anxious shadows of the people they once were.

Yes, I’ve helped them to get their true selves back in place but why allow it all to become so grim to begin with?

If you want something you’ll need to be self-assertive enough to stand up and demand it.

I use hypnotherapy in Reading, London, Oxford, Wallingford and Thame in order to help people demand their due from life. If you want to be self-assertive then you’ll need to learn how. Hypnotherapy could help you to be more confident, less anxious, more demanding and less of a doormat. It’s time to stand up and be heard!

If you’re not going to do it for yourself, do it for your children

If you want your children to model themselves on your example, to be all meek and compliant, to risk being walked over and forgotten, go ahead and ignore this post. Children look to parents in order to learn how to behave.

Don’t you want them to feel better about their lives than you do right now? Set them a better example! I could help you to rebalance your life in order that your children learn that nobody should let themselves be subsumed within a role.

Have a  look at the image below. These are the effects of stress on the human body!

I’ve written before on the myth of mind / body dualism. A stressed mind will play havoc with the body and illness can be the body’s way of demanding a break.

Stress doesn’t just kill overweight executives in middle age, it weakens your ability to enjoy good health and serenity in the here and now. It prevents you from achieving your goals as efficiently, healthily and happily as you might.

Stress, by the way, is also a major culprit of the sudden arrival of erectile dysfunction or premature ejaculation. Perhaps that will give some of you male readers pause for thought.

Self esteem is a key ingredient of assertiveness and being willing to say “no!” Hypnotherapy could help you find it

Stress has an impact upon every area of our lives. If you can’t say “no” yet then you could learn. Hypnotherapy is great for learning how to be assertive.

You could learn to be more self-assertive, more demanding. You could learn to put yourself first and to stop being the person who’s always looking for ways to please everybody else. 

Hypnotherapy, in the hands of a skilled and ethical hypnotherapist, can help you reduce the damage you suffer from stress.

Hypnotherapy can help you to rebalance your life in order to leave you better able to achieve your priorities. I’ve used hypnotherapy in Thame, Wallingford, Reading and Oxford to help people become assertive enough to put themselves first.

What good would it do you, your family, your colleagues if your body one day simply decided to force you into taking notice of stress? Wouldn’t you like to achieve your goals in a less stressful manner?

If you’d like to discuss this further, call me on 07786 123736. Alternatively, email me at paul@resolvedhypnotherapy.co.uk

Best wishes

The post Be self-assertive. Learn to say “no” or your body, sometime, will. appeared first on Resolved Hypnotherapy Reading, Wallingford, Oxford, Thame, Didcot.

Is there meant to be a point to anything in life?

Meursault, hero of Camus’ novel “The Stranger” is unjustly condemned to death. As he awaits his execution he realises how absurd, how meaningless the universe truly is. 

He finds in this fact a comfort, for the universe’s very meaninglessness grants us the freedom through which to find our own truth. We are masters of our own meaning. Make of your existence what you will! As for how Meursault faces his own inescapable doom, you’ll have to read the book for yourself.

Friedrich Nietzsche once wrote that “He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.”

Some of my clients find that hypnotherapy in Wallingford, Reading, London, Thame and Oxford can help them to find that meaning to life which motivates, invigorates and gives purpose to their existence.

Perhaps I could help you to find a why. You can then learn to cope with the ‘how’. In time you’ll learn to take back control and so create your own ‘how’.

Meet with me, work with me and we’ll find a way. Keep on doing what you’re doing and nothing will change.

Mussolini said that it is better to live a day as a lion than a year as a lamb. Perhaps, if you live as a lion you’ll use your strength to live longer than a day. Take back control. Hypnotherapy could help you.

Are you simply drifting through life?

Most people, perhaps, pass through life without giving it too much thought. For some, however, the meaning of life acquires a significance which money, success, power doesn’t fill. Sometimes this comes quite early or late in life. For others it can take the form of the dreaded ‘midlife crisis’. It’s here where hypnotherapy could step in and help  fill a void.

Have you reached the end of a career, only to find that the rest of your life stretches before you and feels empty of purpose? Have you hit your forties and wonder what you’ve done (and will do) with your life? Has a divorce or the empty-nest syndrome knocked you for six? If so hypnotherapy could help.

Some will find the absence of a God, of an ultimate truth, a catastrophe. If life is finite, if life has no meaning, what’s the point? Why bother getting up in the morning?

Well, if you have no God then you have ultimate freedom. You can decide for yourself. What is important to you? Is it money, power, sex?

Is it a sense of vocation, helping others, writing, art or love?

Is family and its happiness the object which will motivate you to get up each and every morning?

Is it this, or another motivation which will help you to see your way through each hardship and incidence of adversity which would otherwise cause you to cash your chips and fail?

Whatever it may be, you can construct your own meaning of life. You can take responsibility for your own happiness and contentment. It can be, perhaps, more of a liberation than a sentence.

Take back control.

Step by step and day by day you could learn to discover and harness your strengths. 

Step by step and day by day you could begin to build a life which you’ll recognise as being a life worth living. 

Begin by discovering the ‘why’ and you’ll then begin to find you very own ‘how’. 

Viktor Frankl and logotherapy explains how and why this is all important

Viktor Frankl was a Jewish inmate of Auschwitz. Whilst there he noticed that some people would soldier on and survive the experience whilst others would seemingly give up, sink and succumb to despair. When this happened, he observed, death soon followed.

He established that those people who had some sense of a greater meaning to life had something to cling to when all else had left them. These people survived because they had a greater cause to motivate them. Those who gave up and died did so, he believed, because they had lost this motivating source.

It does make sense, I believe. We have all heard about people who lived to an old age and yet died within days or weeks of their spouse. Their meaning to life had died with this spouse. The Japanese have a word for such a reason to get up and out of bed. It’s called ‘Ikygai’ and if you have it, your life feels purposeful, meaningful and it’s this which helps to keep some of them (particularly in Okinawa) living way beyond their three score and ten. 

Publicans and teachers, I once read, used to be well-known for dropping dead soon after retirement. Their sense of vocation meant that retirement robbed them of their whole identity. Having a sense of purpose keeps us alive. Having something to work towards, or even just to nurture, is good for our health.

It would appear, therefore, that we all need – or at least could benefit from – a sense of meaning beyond the mere act of surviving from day to day. Existential hypnotherapy could help you realise what this meaning might be.

What is it which gets you up in the morning?

We all need a reason to get up in the morning, to strive, to live. A divine truth works for a good many people. If it doesn’t work for you, however, it needn’t mean endless existential angst. You can find happiness and meaning in a finite life and in a meaningless universe. If you can’t, you will.

Call me on 07786 123736 to find out more. Alternatively you could email me at paul@resolvedhypnotherapy.co.uk or simply use the form below.

Life, when it has a purpose, has a direction. When it has a direction then we can know our goals and we can break them into achievable bite-sized chunks. We can then make progress towards achieving, consolidating or simply enjoying the full pleasure of our existence. Together we can help you to rediscover your sense of purpose, your direction and the energy with which to pursue your goals. 

You deserve better than to suffer the depression and anxiety of simply drifting through life without drive, purpose and ambition. You deserve, just as much as everybody else, to have the best possible chance of achieving contentment and peace in this life. Renew your zest for life with hypnotherapy!

Best wishes

Contact me here!

Hello. Just fill in this form and your message will come to me via email. I'll then email you back as soon as possible. If you'd prefer me to call you then simply let me know in your message. Don't forget to provide a number if this is the case. Best wishes. Paul

---

Your Name:*

Subject:*

Message:*

E-mail:*

SubmitReset

Type the characters you see here:

* Indicates required fields

(HOME)

The post Existential hypnotherapy. What is the meaning of life? appeared first on Resolved Hypnotherapy Reading, Wallingford, Oxford, Thame, Didcot.

Their imaginations can invent anything!

Imagination has driven the world forward since the dawn of human history. We’ve used it to imagine the solution to a problem and then to put that solution into practice. We’ve used it to create the most soaringly beautiful works of art, the most glorious literature and we’ve used it to create monsters. Imagination can be the source of wondrous beauty and of blood-curdling terror.

When I first wrote this post, back in 2016, I was a psychotherapist/adults for adults. I also worked with adolescents because my 20 years of secondary school teaching gave me a deep understanding of adolescents and how their minds work. 

Since that time I have completed a Masters Degree in child and adolescent psychotherapy. I’m therefore qualified to work with children of any age and very much enjoy doing so.

This training has educated me in just how powerful the imagination of younger children can be. In therapeutic terms, imagination can be used for good and for evil. It can help children and adolescents to thrive or it can hold them back and stifle their efforts to thrive. Read more of what I do with children and adolescents through visiting www.resolvedcounsellingforchildren.com.

Any branch of psychotherapy has to be able to utilise the imagination if it is to help clients to make lasting changes. To aim towards a new goal we need to be able to imagine how it will be when we get there. We need to be able to imagine that things can be different.

Hypnotherapy uses it too! 

Children are born with an endless imagination. School and reality can, all too often, drive it out of them. Lucky, indeed, is the child is the child who grows to adulthood with his or her full capacity for imagination intact.

However, sometimes an imagination can be a double edged sword. I have used hypnotherapy in Reading, London, Oxford, Wallingford and Thame to help children free themselves from problems which their own imaginations have created.

For example…

When my daughter was eight she began to show a fear of her own bedroom.

It turns out that she saw some lights shining through the rain on her bedroom window and, in an instant, she created a terrifying backstory to the image which her brain created for her.

Imagination caused her to invent all kinds of nasties which left her so terrified that she refused to go to bed on her own from that point on.

I can remember, as a child, watching Jaws on TV. My imagination was so strong that I was, from that point, scared to go to the toilet for a few days. Water, all water, was scary!

My sister laughed at me at the time. Oh well, it was that same imagination which later saw me writing children’s poetry and getting it published. It is that same imagination which enables me to dream up the most wonderful metaphors when working with clients. Imagination can come with a price but its rewards are marvellous too.

Your child can learn to use his or her imagination in order to make changes to the ways in which they think, feel or behave. It’s my job to help them to learn how.

Let’s begin, shall we?

Their imaginations make them ideal subjects for hypnotherapy

Children have fantastic imaginations. This is why they’re so awesome at hypnotherapy. Their imaginations, however, can get them into trouble and this is when they come to see me.

Once we establish how their imaginations have become a bit naughty and have invented a problem, they can begin to take control and to imagine the solution…

Their imaginations can uninvent almost anything too!

I also offer hypnotherapy for children aged 10+

In this case the problem is also the solution. When children can imagine themselves into a problem they can also imagine themselves out of it. Hypnotherapy can guide them through this process.

I helped my daughter to see nicer things in the raindrops on her window. She began to have fun seeing fairies, unicorns and all kinds of harmless things.

If your child has dreamed up all sorts of nasties then I’ll be glad to help him or her imagine themselves free of it. Happy children grow into happy adults. Your child deserves the chance to leave his or her fear behind them.

I see many child clients for whom their imagination creates all sorts of terrifying nasties at bedtime. My daughter found my techniques effective. Your child could too. Get in touch if you’d like to hear more of how hypnotherapy could help make bedtime a relaxing and safe experience.

What else could hypnotherapy help a child with?

Other little boys and girls have used their imaginatons to resolve enuresis, or bedwetting. They’ve used their imaginations to rid themselves of the fear of ghosts, to lose their fear of SATs, to get rid of recurrent nightmares, to lose their fear of swallowing or new and unknown foods and much more besides. Give me a call to find out if I could help your child too.

Resolved! Hypnotherapy has helped plenty of children. Your child can find peace too!

If your child has unwittingly used his imagination to create terror then rest assured that he has a very strong unconscious mind which could be used to reverse the process. You needn’t suffer your child to go to bed scared every night.

You needn’t have him or her in bed with you, disrupting your own evenings and sleep. Hypnotherapy could help your child, just as it has already helped dozens of children in Reading, Thame, London, Wallingford and Oxford. If you’d like to hear more about this then you might choose to call me on 07786123736 or email me at paul@resolvedhypnotherapy.co.uk. I look forward to hearing from you.

Best wishes

HOME

The post Imagine that! Hypnotherapy for children. appeared first on Resolved Hypnotherapy Reading, Wallingford, Oxford, Thame, Didcot.

A carefully handled divorce needn’t scar your children for life. A messy one can and will. Hypnotherapy could help.

If you’re here because you’re worried about how your divorce has affected your child, I’m truly sorry. I have also gone through the process of divorce and so have a good understanding of how hideous a process it can become. I hope that we can work together to help mitigate its effects upon your child.

I see so many adult clients whose problems began when their parents divorced. It doesn’t matter how long ago this happened or how old the client may be, if the divorce was messy and destructive the child suffered and the adult bears the scars.

I work in Reading, Oxford, London, Wallingford and Thame. In every town and city I am currently seeing child-clients whose parents have divorced or who are in the midst of the process. I am helping these children to moderate and undo the damage done.

I’ve also read extensively on the topic as a part of my Masters degree in child and adolescent psychotherapy. All of the literature agrees that divorce is a psychologically damaging event in a child’s life. I waited, to begin my own divorce, until my children were old enough so as to be minimally affected. However, I am fully aware that not everybody has the luxury of such a choice.

A messy divorce or where the children become too aware of the conflict between their parents only makes things a great deal worse. 

Children depend on their parents for their sense of security. Children need their parents to be parents. Children don’t need to know their parents’ every fear, how upset they are, how much they hate their ex and why they’re in the right. Children will get to know their parents as adults, as human beings, as an inevitable part of the maturation process. They don’t need it now. It is, in fact, positively harmful.

Witnessing a parent in distress is emotionally damaging to a child

I doubt that it’s possible for parents to divorce without some strong and distressing emotions becoming visible to children. We’re none of us superhuman and such things will happen.

However, many of my child clients and plenty of the adults have been witness to weeks, months, even years of furious fights, sobbing, despair and worse.

These children are trying to cope with strong emotions of their own. Seeing their parents feeling similarly weak scares and upsets them further. What’s more, they’ll frequently close down their own feelings in order to attempt to become their parent’s carer.

This is not and should not be the role of the child. To be fully emotionally healthy parents need to be honest with themselves about their own emotions. For children to be emotionally healthy these same parents need to remember that children need and deserve to be protected from uncontrolled emotion. They do not understand what is going on, cannot help and can only suffer.

Their trust in the world will be shaken. They will commonly experience extreme anxiety as they struggle to adjust to new domestic arrangements. Younger children will wonder and fear that they may be to blame in some way. They’ll often become a whole lot clingier and their growing dependence will take a step backwards as they wonder if they’re next in line for the chop. Their whole view of the world will change and not for the better. Witnessing the rages, sobs and depression of a parent will only render things worse.

What about teenagers? Do they cope more effectively?

Young teenagers and adolescents may have a greater understanding of the world around them. They may have a more developed insight into the nature of relationships but the divorce of their parents will still have an effect. It’s my experience that adolescents respond with anger at their parents and an increased desire to seize their independence- often before they are truly ready.

Parental discipline can suffer since the parent ‘messed up’ the family and so obviously doesn’t know ‘what they’re on about’. Adolescents will often, in response to divorce, become more rebellious, resentful and distant and family relationships will suffer as a result.

How can hypnotherapy help?

Sometimes I find myself using my counselling skills to help parents and children reopen channels of communication which have closed. I’m always helping the children of divorced parents to deal with and eliminate their anxiety. On occasion I’m helping children to see that they were not to blame for their parents decisions. I help my child clients to cope with strong emotions, to regulate them more effectively and to move through their process of grieving for the family they once had but lost. When these things happen the divorce and its consequences are more easily managed.

Hypnotherapy, combined with the approaches of a child and adolescent psychotherapist, can prove a powerful combination and can help children to make sense of things, preserving their own sense of self and their ability to thrive.

If you live in or near Reading, Oxford, London, Thame or Wallingford and your child needs some help in coming to terms with your divorce then please do give me a call. I’ll be glad to help and have plenty of experience in this field. You could call me on 07786123736, email me at paul@resolvedhypnotherapy.co.uk or simply use the contact form in the footer of this page. Your child can get past this and I look forward to being the one to help.

Best wishes

The post Children and divorce. Hypnotherapy can help appeared first on Resolved Hypnotherapy Reading, Wallingford, Oxford, Thame, Didcot.

Friendships are such an important part of our lives that its vital to get them right. Many of the same people who would refuse to waste their lives with an abusive partner will nonetheless hold onto toxic friends. Watch the above video if you’re beginning to suspect that one or more of your friendships is becoming toxic. Measure those friends whose value you doubt against its words.

I’ve just read an article on this very subject. An interesting new study has just established that keeping difficult people in our lives is physically bad for us, ageing us prematurely. It isn’t only our mental health that we should be thinking about. Our bodies suffer when we’re surrounded by too many ‘hasslers’. You can read more about this here.

Are your friendships healthy and positive in the benefits they bring to your life?

Once upon a time I was able to witness a group dynamic which worked as follows:

Every one of the women concerned was considerably overweight.

Every morning they would discuss their weight in terms which led me to believe that they were unhappy with their bodies.

Every morning they would discuss food. They’d discuss the good foods and the bad foods. They’d discuss what they’d eaten and what they hadn’t.

Every morning they would provide each other with excuses as to why their most recent diet had failed. “It’s so hard” they’d say and provide one another with excuses.

They would often bring cakes in for one another to share. After Christmas or Easter would come the boxes of surplus chocolates, biscuits and so on. They didn’t want this stuff at home, for they’d only end up eating it. So they all brought it into the office to share with the others. The trouble was that they only ever ended up eating just as much as they would have done if they’d left it all at home.

It was almost as if none of them wanted the others to succeed. They’d sabotage one another and give one another more excuses through which tyey could fail.

Not one of them ever lost weight. Despite their protestations of mutual support they were toxic to each others’ goals. Any one of them would have done better on their own.

Looking to lose weight? You could find out how to do it, here.

It was a group dynamic in which they all subconsciously conspired to keep each other overweight

A friend of mine recently described how she had had to let another friend go. She had found this friend at a time in which they were both depressed.

They supported each other but, over time, my friend began to feel as if her friend was attempting to sabotage her recovery from depression.

When my friend announced that she was going for therapy she was told that ‘it was rubbish’ and would ‘never work’.

A new relationship was undermined and her new boyfriend ridiculed. The ‘friend’ attempted to sow seeds of mistrust in my friends’s mind. ‘He’ll cheat on you. They always do’. Every positive step forwards was met with doubt and subtle ridicule.

Another person discussed how she’d spent dozens of hours in helping her friend to build a business. When, however, she asked for the tiniest favour in return the shutters came down. The relationship was unequal. It was all take and no give. The relationship had become toxic and it was quite obviously time to let this friend go.

Do you have friends like this? Do you find yourself hanging onto them? Does it seem like an obvious thing to let them go and yet you find the prospect difficult or even scary? If so then hypnotherapy could help you.

Looking to break free of depression? I could help you.

(enough details in these stories have been changed so as to preserve confidentiality)

We compare ourselves to our friends. If they get ahead we may find ourselves feeling jealous and left behind.

Who wants to be the only overweight person in a group of friends? If your overweight friends begin to shed the pounds and you can’t then you risk being the group’s ‘failure’. Nobody wants that. Individuals and groups of people who are linked by a common problem will often conspire, consciously or otherwise, to keep one another trapped. Progress on the part of one or more of them will bring the risk of being the odd one out or losing those friends altogether.

Sometimes, when we come across friends because of a problem or an addiction, the problem or addiction is all we have in common. I hear this all of the time in those clients who come to me to break their dependencies on alcohol or other drugs.

Sometimes we may realise that this friend or group of friends is a major reason as to why we’ve failed to come to our senses sooner.

Addictions can be hard enough to break, even without ‘friends’ who attempt to tempt you back into using, belittling your efforts to leave drugs behind and emotionally manipulating you into remaining a part of the group.

If you need help with breaking an addiction then please click here

Sometimes, when these people are conspiring to keep us trapped, we owe it to ourselves to break free – even if means leaving people in trouble. Nothing will help them to change until they recognise the need to do so and want to do so. 

Sometimes, just sometimes, showing people that it can be done – that goals can be achieved – is a better way of helping them than staying with them in your mutually destructive dynamic. 

Two friends fighting to stay afloat can sometimes drown one another. Get yourself sorted and then you could really help them – if they’re truly ready to be helped.

We’re socially programmed to value loyalty. Leaving friends behind is difficult, even when friendships are toxic and mutually damaging. Sometimes, however, it’s the only thing to do.

Friendships rise and fall naturally during the course of our lives. Best friends from your school years move away. Sometimes we fall out with friends or they simply drift further and further away from us. Sometimes, just sometimes, we may have to decide that a friend is no longer a positive part of our lives before taking the conscious step of breaking that bond.

If you’re going to achieve your goals then you will have to re-evaluate the necessity of everything which may be holding you back. Your real friends (even if you’ve abandoned them for the toxic ones) will be glad to see you, your family will be relieved and your children – actual or future – will have cause to thank you.

If you’d like to work on these issues then call me on 07786123736 or email me at paul@resolvedhypnotherapy.co.uk. I look forward to hearing from you. 

Best wishes

Contact me here!

Hello. Just fill in this form and your message will come to me via email. I'll then email you back as soon as possible. If you'd prefer me to call you then simply let me know in your message. Don't forget to provide a number if this is the case. Best wishes. Paul

---

Your Name:*

Subject:*

Message:*

E-mail:*

SubmitReset

Type the characters you see here:

* Indicates required fields

The post Do your friends bring out the best or the stressed in you? appeared first on Resolved Hypnotherapy Reading, Wallingford, Oxford, Thame, Didcot.

Have you recently come to the same conclusion as every non and former smoker: that smoking is a complete and utter waste of time? If you’re living in or around Reading, London, Oxford, Wallingford or Thame then perhaps hypnotherapy could help you to turn that realisation into the decision to leave the habit behind you, once and for all.

A recent British Journal of Psychiatry study followed nearly 500 smokers attending NHS stop smoking clinics in England.It found a “significant” decrease in anxiety levels among the 68 smokers who had quit after six months. Andy Parrott in ‘American Psychologist’ found that smokers were slightly more stressed than non-smokers. What’s going on here?

Those who smoke because it eases stress are actually mistaken. It doesn’t. It’s an absence of nicotine which causes a smoker to feel stress and smoking restores nicotine levels to their “normal” levels causing the smoker to feel as if stress has left them.

Furthermore, the first thing a smoker will do upon lighting that eagerly awaited cigarette is to inhale deeply – then exhaling in a leisurely fashion. 

Why not take that nice relaxing breath without the smoke?

Why not head out of the office for a few minutes without the excuse of a cigarette? The only relaxing things about cigarettes are the things you could still continue to enjoy without them. 

You could stop smoking with hypnotherapy in Reading, Wallingford, Thame, Oxford or Didcot! The study shows you’d feel even more relaxed than you ever could have done as a smoker. What’s the point of wrecking your health and emptying your wallet if the end result is feeling more stressed?

Stopping smoking means that you’d save your health, your money and your self-respect to boot. Wouldn’t that be worth it?

Why is smoking stressful?

Smoking causes the average smoker’s heart to take an extra 10,000 beats per day. How relaxing does that sound? Nicotine is a stimulant. It increases the metabolism, increases heart rate, tenses the muscles, raises blood pressure and accelerates the rate of breathing.

The gaps between cigarettes see smokers descend into stress and a period of craving the next fix. This isn’t relaxing. This is stressful and it’s only the habits and rituals associated with smoking which bring any sense of calm at all. Habits and rituals which needn’t involve smoking at all.

The rejection of the smokers by family and friends (you have to stop smoking to truly understand how powerful and dreadful the smell truly is) is another source of stress. At the very least it commonly results in the smoker being refused access to comforting behaviours such as hugging and kissing.

What’s relaxing about the habit? What’s cool about it? What’s seductive about the ‘cat’s arse’ lines around the mouth, the receding gums, the thinning skin and the stench?

I wish you could all meet the elderly women I’ve worked with who are crippled by COPD, a direct consequence of their smoking habits. You could try to tell them that spending your final years breathless and terrified is OK because they had all those years of being a cool smoker. I think they’d feel differently.

Sometimes dying of cancer, through smoking, is an easy way out. There are worse fates and living without being able to take a full breath is one of them.

Do you wish to remain enslaved by smoking until you lose a limb through the habit’s effects upon your circulation? Do you wish to see your teeth fall out, one by one, because your habit caused the jawbone to thin and your gums to recede. How cool will that be?

You know much of this already and I’m fully aware that scaring people isn’t the best way of helping them to stop. It might, however, cause you to think about your life in old age and whether you want that stage of your life to be a happy one or a decade or so of misery. It might, therefore, help you to begin to want to stop.

Your non-smoking friends do just fine without cigarettes. You have no need of them either.

Nobody can make you want to stop and I wouldn’t want to have you as a client before you truly did want to stop. Motivation is key, after all.

The least you can do, however, is be honest with yourself. You don;t still smoke because it’s a wonderful thing to do. You continue to smoke because it’s a habit and because it’s easier, in the short term, to carry on with it rather than facing it down.

With hypnotherapy you could be smoke free within two hours. You could feel as relaxed as a non smoker all of the time. Picture yourself outside a pub somewhere in Oxfordshire or Berkshire, smoking as the rain lashes down outside of that flimsy shelter.

How stressed are your non-smoking friends inside? They’re perfectly relaxed, warm, healthier than you and it doesn’t cost them a single penny. Why not join them?

One thing I should add, however: smoking cessation in one or two sessions is strictly for those who enjoy average or better mental health in general. If you are suffering from anxiety or depression (or any of their symptoms such as OCD, for example) then you will need to work on these things whilst you reduce smoking over time. I mean, I could just take your money, go through the two session package and then just send you on your way. The chances are, however, that you’d just end up going back to smoking when the going gets tough again. That’s no good for you and it’s not the way I want to work. If you want to stop smoking and to stay stopped then there’s no use in seeking short-cuts. 

If you live in or near Reading, Oxford, Thame or Wallingford and would like to discuss how hypnotherapy could help you, please give me a call on 07786 123736. Alternatively you could email me at paul@resolvedhypnotherapy.co.uk

Best wishes

(HOME)

The post Stop smoking, stop stress! Hypnotherapy could help you! appeared first on Resolved Hypnotherapy Reading, Wallingford, Oxford, Thame, Didcot.

Hello, people of Didcot.

If you live in or around Didcot and have found this site whilst looking for hypnotherapy then let me begin by saying I’m sorry. I’m sorry that you have to be here. I love every moment of my work but I’m not at all happy that so many great and wonderful people are suffering from depression, anxiety, OCD, phobias, IBS, addictions or whatever it may be. I use hypnotherapy in Didcot to help people to overcome all kinds of emotional issues but I’m always saddened that my lovely clients are experiencing such problems.

I don’t think there has ever been a time in the past year when I haven’t been seeing three or more clients from this town. For a town the size of Didcot, this is a more than generous contribution to my caseload. So, thank you. I look forward to helping a good many more of you in the future.

What can hypnotherapy help with?

I like to think that I have been good for the people of Didcot in return. My first client from the areawas afraid of spiders. Resolved! My second was a smoker. Resolved!

I have also seen clients for depression, erectile dysfunction, tinnitus, anxiety, alcoholism, asperger’s syndrome, cibophobia*, bedwetting / enuresis and lots lots more. I enjoyed every moment of helping these people to resolve their issues.

Click here to find out more about the range of issues hypnotherapy could help you to resolve

So, if you’re living in the local area I’d be very grateful to hear from you. You’d be the next in a long line of people from this part of the world to give me a call. Hypnotherapy has helped lots of your neighbours and hypnotherapy could help you too!

Wouldn’t it be wonderful to be able to stop smoking, go a day without even thinking about alcohol, feel relaxed in social situations, feel happy in your own self, be freed from that past and live happily in the present?

I’ve used hypnotherapy in Didcot in order to help people to achieve all of these things. I’ve helped them to get slimmer, happier, healthier and fitter than ever before. I’ve helped people overcome profound traumas, deal with tinnitus and escape the darkest of depressions. 

If you’d like to be the next person to achieve your goals then the door is always open.

Why not get in touch to find out more?

If you’ve read this far and would like to know more about how hypnotherapy can help you, please click HERE to go to my home page and to learn more. If you’d like to get in touch then please just email me at paul@resolvedhypnotherapy.co.uk or else simply call me. My number is 07786 123736.

I’m one of the few UKCP accredited hypnotherapists in the Didcot area.

Most of my newest Didcot clients seem to be coming to see me wanting to lose weight. I thought, therefore, that I’d post this video for others who, like them, are fed up of the endless dieting. I could help you to lose weight without suffering that awful feeling of deprivation. I could help you to resolve any emotional issues which underlie the original causes of weight gain.

When you resolve depression, anxiety or whatever it may be, whilst learning new habits, the weight tends to come off and stays off! It’s not a professional video and I’m not a great subject but, anyway, it’ll give you an idea of who I am and how I use hypnotherapy to help my Didcot clients lose weight.

Why see a UKCP registered hypnotherapist?

In my opinion there are two organisations which register seriously professional therapists in the UK: UKCP and BACP. Yesterday I went to have my teeth cleaned and polished and discovered that the dental hygienist had trained for three years. I was impressed. I trained for four years to achieve UKCP registration but the majority of hypnotherapists train for a year at most. 

There’s a man who calls himself a trainer of hypnotherapists. His course lasts for three days. Oh yes, he offers ongoing support to his students but it’s simply not the same as a solid course which leaves people adequately trained and ready to work with some of society’s most vulnerable people.

Many of the therapists in your local area  will be excellent but I only refer people onto UKCP registered hypnotherapists in order that I can be sure of the quality of their training. I believe that people in need of help deserve the best and so I trained with the best in order that I could be as effective a therapist as possible.

You, your loved ones and your friends deserve nothing less.

If you’d like to ask me more about my training, my methods and my approach to hypnotherapy then please feel free. Simply pick up the phone or send me an email. I’ll be glad to talk with you in order that you can feel as confident as possible that you’re receiving the best available hypnotherapy.

Perhaps, however, you’re not here for your own self.

Hypnotherapy isn’t just for adults. I work with lots of children and teenagers too!

Children are great at hypnotherapy. They tend to have fantastic imaginations and have fewer preconceptions to get in the way.

I have helped children with asperger’s syndrome, enuresis, OCD, pathological demand avoidance, school refusal, anxiety, panic attacks, trichotillomania, adjustment following divorce, anger-management, recovery from bullying, phobias and much, much more.

Since first writing this post I have completed a masters degree in child and adolescent psychotherapy. Given my twenty years of secondary school teaching I always had a great deal of understanding of teenagers and adolescents. Now I’m fully trained and very experienced in working with children as young as four. This training has also been very useful in changing how I see my work with adults.

I’m often shocked by hypnotherapists who will often write, in fora on facebook, posts such as “Hi. I’m a hypnotherapist working in Surrey. I’m going to work with a four year old girl who is not sleeping. Any tips would be great. Thanks!”

I’m shocked because children are not little adults. You don’t just speak in baby voice and use simpler words. Working effectively and safely with children of such an age requires training and an understanding of how their minds work, what they can understand and their capacity for managing and working with emotions.

Don’t just take your child to see your local therapist who says they’re OK to work with your child because they have one the same age. Your child deserves a therapist who knows what they’re doing.

Wouldn’t it be great to see your child smiling again?

I truly love working with young people and if your childneeds a little help then I’ll be more than happy to help.

With twenty years of teaching experience (secondary) under my belt I am well qualified to work with children and teens over ten years of age.

In some straightforward circumstances – a simple phobia, enuresis or thumb sucking – I may be able to see children slightly younger. 

I must stress that I’m not a formally trained child psychotherapist and so if your child is suffering from a severe trauma then I’m probably not the right therapist for you. I begin my training as a child and adolescent psychotherapist in January 2019. It’ll take two years of hard work but I really can’t wait to begin.

Hypnotherapy for ASC clients in South Oxfordshire

Around a quarter of my clients are on the autistic spectrum and I have a great degree of experience of working with this client group.My eldest daughter is high-functioning and it was this which led me into studying the topic and taking on my first AS / HFA clients. 

Autism is for life, of course, and yet this doesn’t mean that people on the spectrum have to learn to live with panic attacks, depression, OCD, social anxiety and the like. You can hope to do far better than simply cope. 

You could learn to thrive.

The problems you currently experience can be overcome by working with a patient and compassionate therapist who possesses an understanding of spectrum-related issues. I’d be very glad to help you or your AS relative to live a happier and more fulfilled life.

Dozens and dozens of people on the autistic spectrum have learned to do the same. There’s no reason why you couldn’t learn to do it too.

Home visits to areas surrounding Didcot are available where necessary

If you can’t make it to visit me in Wallingford (only six miles and fifteen minutes away) then let me know. I do make home visits for those who can’t travel. Didcot is so close that it’s no bother.

If you’d like to hear more of how I could help you to resolve your difficulties then please do give me a call and we’ll discuss how I could help you.

Best wishes

* Cibophobia is a fear of food and commonly results in people living with a very restricted diet.

The post Hypnotherapy in Didcot, Oxfordshire. appeared first on Resolved Hypnotherapy Reading, Wallingford, Oxford, Thame, Didcot.

If you smoke then you will probably have noticed the new Stoptober adverts. The idea is that you stop smoking for a mere 28 days. You might then decide to quit for good.

The idea is solid. You decide to stop for a mere month and from that point on you’re merely counting days, with a view to re-starting the habit once the month is over. It removes that ‘forever is a very long time feeling’.

I’ve seen plenty of clients for smoking cessation who began Stoptober and who got a great deal out of it, even if they didn’t make it all the way or began again soon afterwards.

People come to me for stop smoking hypnotherapy in Reading, Oxford, London, Wallingford and Thame. Stoptober gave some of them the confidence that they could at least stop smoking for a time. It was my job to help them to see that it could become permanent.

So, if you’re not yet ready to see me then perhaps Stoptober could be the first port of call. See how well you can do. Perhaps you’ll manage to stop the smoking habit forever.

If not then hypnotherapy could be the next thing you’ll try.

It could be the last!

Others have managed it before you and so why can’t you?

Once you start stopping, it’s easier to stay stopped

The idea is that you begin with Stoptober, find it easier to stop smoking than you imagined and so decide to stop for good. What a good plan!

What if, however, you didn’t have to force yourself through a whole month with the hope that it might then become a habit? What if you simply stopped smoking without the need to wait for a certain date?

What if you decided to simply stop right now?

There’s an easier way to stop smoking and it involves hypnotherapy

What if there were a way to do this without cravings, without the need to suffer withdrawal symptoms? You could simply stop smoking, this week, this month, whenever it happened to be. Cravings are the product of a mind divided against itself. It’s my job to build and buttress your motivation so that you suffer the fewest and least powerful cravings possible.

I use hypnotherapy in Reading, Oxford, London, Wallingford and Thame to help people to simply stop. Cravings are minimised and often absent altogether.

Willpower is enhanced and a sense of calm, confident control is instilled. Some people find that they simply don’t think about smoking when they leave our final session. Others find that such thoughts quickly evaporate and cause them little or no bother whatsoever.

It seems to work. I once worked with a whole line of seven friends coming to me, one after the other, each coming because the person before them said how effective it was. 

Some of them were just trapped within a bad habit. They were the easier clients to work with. Some had anxiety or depression and needed to work on those things as well as upon the habit of smoking. Anxiety and depression can render smoking a genuine psychological crutch. These clients can take longer to work with than those who simply have smoking as a bad habit. They will still, however, leave smoking behind them, if that is a sincere goal.

This is very important…

Lots of people have read the websites that promise you a miracle in one or two sessions. What those sites don;t tell you is that smoking cessation in one or two sessions is only really a good way of going about things if there are no mental health issues which complicate the habit of smoking. If you are suffering from anxiety or depression (or any of their symptoms such as OCD, other addictions) then you will have to work on those at the same time, if you want to be sure of stopping the habit of smoking. Smoking can appear to be a genuine friend and support to those who have no other coping strategies in place.

It’s important to never remove a coping strategy until another is firmly in place. If smoking seems to be holding you together then you need more than just an off the peg ‘miracle’ solution. It won’t be enough to just learn a few relaxation exercises. You’ll need to learn how to regulate yourself emotionally and that’s just the start. If you’re not ready to do that then smoking cessation through hypnotherapy is probably not for you. You’ll either return to smoking or simply find an equally unhealthy way of dealing with things.

Hypnotherapy could help you to stop smoking right now!

Some people approach this month with the determination to keep going once November arrives. Others decide just to give themselves a break from the habit. Approach “Stoptober” with the idea that it need only be a temporary sacrifice and you’re destined for failure. Don’t stop smoking for 28 days. Stop forever!

You could be a non-smoker within two hours and the cravings will be weak to non-existent. You won’t put on weight, there’ll be no cravings, you’ll feel healthier within days. Oh, you’ll also save thousands of pounds in the first year alone.

Still have doubts? Well, give me a call and we’ll talk it through. It won’t cost you a penny to talk with me about how hypnotherapy works with smoking cessation.

If you’re still not convinced then I’ll wish you all the best.

What’s to lose? If you live in or around Reading, Wallingford, Thame or Oxford and would like to simply stop smoking then feel free to contact me for a chat if you’d like to know more of how hypnotherapy can help. Contact me by calling 07786123736 or emailing paul@resolvedhypnotherapy.co.uk and we’ll discuss how hypnotherapy could help you to be free of smoking forever.

Best wishes

The post 28 days? Stop smoking for good this Stoptober. Hypnotherapy can help! appeared first on Resolved Hypnotherapy Reading, Wallingford, Oxford, Thame, Didcot.