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<channel>
	<title>Retard News</title>
	
	<link>http://retardnews.com</link>
	<description>News from retards around the world.</description>
	<pubDate>Mon, 06 Oct 2008 20:31:13 +0000</pubDate>
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	<language>en</language>
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		<title>Latest fashion craze in ultra-violent Mexico City is bulletproof clothing</title>
		<link>http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/RetardNews/~3/413121754/</link>
		<comments>http://retardnews.com/2008/10/06/latest-fashion-craze-in-ultra-violent-mexico-city-is-bulletproof-clothing/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 06 Oct 2008 20:31:13 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>jerome</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[International Retards]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://retardnews.com/?p=580</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[With murders and kidnappings at record levels one trendy boutique in Mexico City is selling a full line of high end bulletproof clothing.

With the armored sections sewn in the fashions are much less bulky looking and fashionable than simply wearing a vest underneath what you are regular clothing.  There are leather jackets, polo shirts, [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>With murders and kidnappings at record levels one trendy boutique in Mexico City is selling a full line of high end bulletproof clothing.<br />
<span id="more-580"></span><br />
With the armored sections sewn in the fashions are much less bulky looking and fashionable than simply wearing a vest underneath what you are regular clothing.  There are leather jackets, polo shirts, wind-breakers, and even polo shirts on sale. </p>
<p>The Mogul Caballero in the trendy Avenida Presidente Masarik section of Mexico City has items ranging in price from a few hundred to around seven thousand dollars.</p>
<p>One customer is a surgeon who sporting a high end fashionable coat can repel cold as well as pistol and even machine gun bullets.</p>
<p>Customers include bullfighters, police, politicians and anyone with higher incomes who are regularly kidnapped for ransom in Mexico City.</p>
<p>&#8220;What we offer is one more chance at life,&#8221; said Javier Di Carlo, the marketing manager, as he showed off the top-of-the-line Black collection in a private fitting room. &#8220;We don&#8217;t want people to say to the criminal, &#8216;Shoot me.&#8217; Nobody should feel like Superman. But if the criminal does shoot, we give our customers a chance to run away.&#8221;</p>
<p>Store workers are required to get shot with one of the protective articles of clothing and one reported a shot to the stomach &#8220;feels like a punch.&#8221;</p>
<p><a href="http://www.iht.com/articles/2008/10/06/america/06mexico.php" target="_blank" >More from IHT</a></p>
<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/RetardNews/~4/413121754" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>
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		<item>
		<title>College freshman drowns face-down in pool of vomit</title>
		<link>http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/RetardNews/~3/413107896/</link>
		<comments>http://retardnews.com/2008/10/06/college-freshman-drowns-face-down-in-pool-of-vomit/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 06 Oct 2008 20:12:56 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>jerome</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Everyday Retards]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://retardnews.com/?p=578</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[18-yaer-old Johnny D. Smith was found lying unconscious in a pool of his own vomit Sunday morning in  a fraternity house at Wabash college near Indianapolis.

The teenager from Tucson Arizona had apparently pledged at the Delta Tau Delta house but had not yet been initiated into the fraternity.  
An autopsy is being done [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>18-yaer-old Johnny D. Smith was found lying unconscious in a pool of his own vomit Sunday morning in  a fraternity house at Wabash college near Indianapolis.<br />
<span id="more-578"></span><br />
The teenager from Tucson Arizona had apparently pledged at the Delta Tau Delta house but had not yet been initiated into the fraternity.  </p>
<p>An autopsy is being done and results will take about a month before the exact cause of death is determined.</p>
<p>Wabash College is an all-male college where 50% of the 900 students enrolled are in fraternities.  The college is located in Crawfordsville, Indiana aboput 40 miles northwest of Indianapolis.</p>
<p><a href="http://www.wsbt.com/news/regional/30508434.html" target="_blank" >Read More</a></p>
<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/RetardNews/~4/413107896" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>
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		<item>
		<title>7-year-old gets free pass on 13 animal zoo killing spree</title>
		<link>http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/RetardNews/~3/410326817/</link>
		<comments>http://retardnews.com/2008/10/03/7-year-old-gets-free-pass-on-13-animal-zoo-killing-spree/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 03 Oct 2008 15:15:04 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>jerome</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[International Retards]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://retardnews.com/?p=576</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[A 7-year-old Australian boy went on a zoo &#8216;killing spree&#8217; during which he killed 15 rare reptiles feeding many of them to a 11-foot long crocodile.

When zoo employees came in the next morning they assumed that the reptiles had somehow escaped into the crocodiles enclosure. Surveillance cameras had a hard time showing the small boy [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>A 7-year-old Australian boy went on a zoo &#8216;killing spree&#8217; during which he killed 15 rare reptiles feeding many of them to a 11-foot long crocodile.<br />
<span id="more-576"></span><br />
When zoo employees came in the next morning they assumed that the reptiles had somehow escaped into the crocodiles enclosure. Surveillance cameras had a hard time showing the small boy who passed under their frame of view.  </p>
<p>One camera for the crocodile enclosure showed an emotionless young boy feeding the rare reptiles to the large 440-pound salt water crocodile.  At one point the boy climbed over the wall to get a closer look at the carnage.</p>
<p>The reptiles included a rare twenty year old goanna, a large turtle, bearded dragons, other goannas, Thorny Devils and Blue tongue lizards which are rare in captivity. </p>
<p>“I thought for the sheer consequences of what he did that there would have to be some severe punishment, but he’s only seven, they can’t do anything to kids under 10,” Mr Neindorf said.</p>
<p>“We’re going to see what we can do, maybe try and sue the family in the civil court, we’ll look down that avenue.”</p>
<p>According to Mr Neindorf, the “nasty” boy’s brother was part of a group who attacked Terry the crocodile about five years ago.</p>
<p>He said they often get kids trying to throw rocks at the animal enclosures from a nearby hill, but this incident is the worst that has happened in the history of the zoo.</p>
<p>Police questioned the boy who lives nearby but are unable to proceed with any criminal charges.  The laws in that part of Australia shield children under the age of ten from liability in any criminal prosecution.</p>
<p><a href="http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/article4874657.ece" target="_blank" >News Article</a></p>
<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/RetardNews/~4/410326817" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>Bank robbed twice in one day</title>
		<link>http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/RetardNews/~3/409568097/</link>
		<comments>http://retardnews.com/2008/10/02/bank-robbed-twice-in-one-day/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 02 Oct 2008 19:58:27 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>jerome</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Everyday Retards]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://retardnews.com/?p=574</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[A Wells Fargo bank in La Mesa California was robbed twice in one day this Monday.

Two different robbers labeled &#8220;The Hard Hat Bandit&#8221; and &#8220;The Chatty Bandit&#8221; robbed the same location within three hours of each other.  The first robber brandished a firearm and demanded money around 3PM and the second passed a note. [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>A Wells Fargo bank in La Mesa California was robbed twice in one day this Monday.<br />
<span id="more-574"></span></p>
<p>Two different robbers labeled &#8220;The Hard Hat Bandit&#8221; and &#8220;The Chatty Bandit&#8221; robbed the same location within three hours of each other.  The first robber brandished a firearm and demanded money around 3PM and the second passed a note. The second robber is believed to have robbed three other banks this week alone.</p>
<p>Neither suspect has been arrested and the FBI is investigating the apparently unrelated robberies.</p>
<p> <a href="http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20081001/ap_on_fe_st/odd_double_robbery" target="_blank" >Read More</a></p>
<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/RetardNews/~4/409568097" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>Robbie Williams hoping for UFO abduction</title>
		<link>http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/RetardNews/~3/409497430/</link>
		<comments>http://retardnews.com/2008/10/02/robbie-williams-hoping-for-ufo-abduction/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 02 Oct 2008 18:27:10 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Michael</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Entertainment]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://retardnews.com/?p=573</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[The intelligent inhabitants of planet Earth are aware of several things, one of those things is that that are not any extraterrestrials around.  Thankfully, Angels singer Robbie Williams, is not going to be confused for an intelligent inhabitant of any place that he goes to.
Williams, who has previously claimed to have had extraterrestrial encounters, [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>The intelligent inhabitants of planet Earth are aware of several things, one of those things is that that are not any extraterrestrials around.  Thankfully, <em>Angels</em> singer Robbie Williams, is not going to be confused for an intelligent inhabitant of any place that he goes to.</p>
<p>Williams, who has previously claimed to have had extraterrestrial encounters, arrived armed with video equipment in his search for aliens during a recent visit to Trout Lake in Washington.<span id="more-573"></span></p>
<p>Extraterrestrial expert Michael C Luckman recently identified Robbie as an alien ambassador, so it would only make sense that Williams would spend two weeks at UFO camp.</p>
<p>Luckman, director of the New York Center for Extraterrestrial Research, also revealed Robbie plans to return to the ranch &#8220;very soon&#8221;.</p>
<p>The expert has now invited the 34-year-old singer to prepare for alien contact by being connected to a special brainwave machine.</p>
<p>Luckman believes Robbie must be trained to deal with &#8220;highly advanced&#8221; intergalactic life-forms by boosting his “psychic powers” and undergoing a procedure similar to one used on Nasa astronauts.</p>
<p>Luckman - author of <em><a href="http://www.amazon.com/dp/product/074346673X/?tag=retar-20" target="_blank">Alien Rock: The Rock &#8216;n&#8217; Roll Extraterrestrial Connection</a></em> - has offered to conduct the testing in New York.</p>
<p>He promises to keep the results confidential, unless Robbie wants them to be released.</p>
<p>Luckman recently claimed Robbie is a “point man” for extraterrestrials and will soon start a new religion in their honour.</p>
<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/RetardNews/~4/409497430" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>Railroad engineer sent text message seconds before deadly crash</title>
		<link>http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/RetardNews/~3/409481218/</link>
		<comments>http://retardnews.com/2008/10/02/railroad-engineer-sent-text-message-seconds-before-deadly-crash/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 02 Oct 2008 18:07:27 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>jerome</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Everyday Retards]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://retardnews.com/?p=570</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Cell phone records revealed that train engineer Robert Sanchez sent a text message 22 seconds before driving through a red light and crashing into an oncoming train.

The crash of the Metrolink commuter train killed 25 people including Sanchez.
The National Transportation Safety Boar revealed the engineer received 21 text messages and sent 24 during over his [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Cell phone records revealed that train engineer Robert Sanchez sent a text message 22 seconds before driving through a red light and crashing into an oncoming train.<br />
<span id="more-570"></span><br />
The crash of the Metrolink commuter train killed 25 people including Sanchez.</p>
<p>The National Transportation Safety Boar revealed the engineer received 21 text messages and sent 24 during over his two hour morning shift.</p>
<p>Sanchez who was gay was messaging teenage boys who liked trains before the crash.</p>
<p>The finding led Federal Railroad Administrator Joseph H. Boardman to announce an emergency order prohibiting use of personal electronic devices by rail workers operating trains and in other key jobs. The order must be published in the Federal Register to take effect. Spokesman Rob Kulat said that would happen &#8220;soon.&#8221; California regulators have already enacted a ban.</p>
<p> <a href="http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20081002/ap_on_re_us/train_collision" target="_blank" >News Article</a></p>
<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/RetardNews/~4/409481218" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>Teacher fired for asking third grade students for massages</title>
		<link>http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/RetardNews/~3/409348736/</link>
		<comments>http://retardnews.com/2008/10/02/teacher-fired-for-asking-third-grade-students-for-massages/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 02 Oct 2008 15:31:14 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>jerome</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Everyday Retards]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://retardnews.com/?p=568</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[A third grade teacher from Kissimmee Florida has been fired for asking some of her third grade students to give her massages.

Donna Coulter assigned jobs to her third grade students including: organizing books, taking out the trash, and giving her massages.
One male student came home and described his new masseuse job to his parents who [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>A third grade teacher from Kissimmee Florida has been fired for asking some of her third grade students to give her massages.<br />
<span id="more-568"></span><br />
Donna Coulter assigned jobs to her third grade students including: organizing books, taking out the trash, and giving her massages.</p>
<p>One male student came home and described his new masseuse job to his parents who contacted the school.</p>
<p>The massages consisted of rubbing around the neck, back and shoulders.</p>
<p>The teacher has been fired, and a note was sent to parents from the school saying, &#8220;Due to unforeseen circumstance, Ms. Coulter will no longer be teaching your student in the third grade.&#8221;</p>
<p><a href="http://www.wftv.com/news/17592463/detail.html" target="_blank" >Read More from WFTV</a></p>
<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/RetardNews/~4/409348736" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>Politician alleges troops executed 5,000 prisoners during hurricane Katrina</title>
		<link>http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/RetardNews/~3/409344283/</link>
		<comments>http://retardnews.com/2008/10/02/politician-alleges-troops-executed-5000-prisoners-during-hurricane-katrina/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 02 Oct 2008 15:17:21 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>jerome</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Political Crap]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://retardnews.com/?p=566</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Former US Congresswoman and Green Party presidential candidate Cynthia McKinney alleges 5,000 prisoners were executed by the military during hurricane Katrina.

The former United States Representative  from Georgia made the comments at a conference in Oakland.  She said according to multiple sources, including those who prepared the bodies which each had single gunshots to [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Former US Congresswoman and Green Party presidential candidate Cynthia McKinney alleges 5,000 prisoners were executed by the military during hurricane Katrina.<br />
<span id="more-566"></span></p>
<p>The former United States Representative  from Georgia made the comments at a conference in Oakland.  She said according to multiple sources, including those who prepared the bodies which each had single gunshots to the head.  . According to the source; who wishes to remain nameless at this time, he was charged by the Department of Defense with the task of processing the personal information into DOD computers and then dumping the bodies into a Louisiana swamp. McKinney also claims she has spoken to unnamed members of the Red Cross that this event did in fact take place.</p>
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		<title>Report warns milk and meat must be rationed to save planet</title>
		<link>http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/RetardNews/~3/409325354/</link>
		<comments>http://retardnews.com/2008/10/02/report-warns-milk-and-meat-must-be-rationed-to-save-planet/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 02 Oct 2008 15:03:09 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>jerome</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Technerd]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://retardnews.com/?p=565</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Humans must ration themselves to four small portions of meat and one liter of milk per week to save the planet from global warming according to a major new report.  Currently people are consuming on average twice that amount of milk.

The report prepared by the Food Climate Research Network from the University of Surrey [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Humans must ration themselves to four small portions of meat and one liter of milk per week to save the planet from global warming according to a major new report.  Currently people are consuming on average twice that amount of milk.<br />
<span id="more-565"></span></p>
<p>The report prepared by the Food Climate Research Network from the University of Surrey England claims other foods should be rationed in addition to meat and milk.</p>
<p>Low nutritional value items such as chocolates, alcohol, and candy should also be controlled.</p>
<p>The report goes on the warn against buying out of season items, cooking in bulk with pressure cookers, and walking to stores.  </p>
<p>The report goes much further than any previous advice after mounting concern about the impact of the livestock industry on greenhouse gases and rising food prices. It follows a four-year study of the impact of food on climate change and is thought to be the most thorough study of its kind.</p>
<p>Tara Garnett, the report&#8217;s author, warned that campaigns encouraging people to change their habits voluntarily were doomed to fail and urged the government to use caps on greenhouse gas emissions and carbon pricing to ensure changes were made. &#8220;Food is important to us in a great many cultural and symbolic ways, and our food choices are affected by cost, time, habit and other influences,&#8221; the report says. &#8220;Study upon study has shown that awareness-raising campaigns alone are unlikely to work, particularly when it comes to more difficult changes.&#8221;</p>
<p>The report is similar to an October edition of the Ecologist magazine which suggested be go vegetarian and avoid milk and dairy products as well.</p>
<p>According to the report food production in the United Kingdom produces 33 million tons of greenhouse gases. When factoring in imports and other factors the total increases to 43 million tons, or a fifth of the total emissions in the UK.  Indirect impacts of food production include transportation, refrigeration, clearing forested areas for cattle and crops.  </p>
<p>Dairy and meat accounted for half of the emissions, fruits and vegetables 15%, sugary foods and drink 15%, and processed foods including breads, pastries, and flour 13%.</p>
<p>Instead, it recommended cutting meat consumption by at least half and making sure animals were fed as much as possible on grass and food waste which could not be eaten by humans.  World population is estimated to grow to nearly 9 billion by 2050, and the UN is calling for a total reduction in emissions by 2050.</p>
<p>The NFU also called for government incentives to help farmers make the changes. &#8220;Farmers aren&#8217;t going to do this out of the goodness of their hearts, because farmers don&#8217;t have that luxury; many of our members are very hard pressed at the moment,&#8221; said Jonathan Scurlock, the NFU&#8217;s chief adviser on renewable energy and climate change.</p>
<p>Pat THomas the Ecologist&#8217;s editor said &#8220;The notion that cows and sheep are four-legged weapons of mass destruction has become something of a distraction from the real issues in both climate change and food production.&#8221; </p>
<p><a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/environment/2008/sep/30/food.ethicalliving" target="blank">Read More from the Guardian</a></p>
<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/RetardNews/~4/409325354" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>Biden caught making up war story</title>
		<link>http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/RetardNews/~3/407617127/</link>
		<comments>http://retardnews.com/2008/09/30/biden-caught-making-up-war-story/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 30 Sep 2008 20:35:18 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>jerome</dc:creator>
		
		<category><![CDATA[Political Crap]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://retardnews.com/?p=563</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Hillary Clinton was taken apart when she falsely claimed to have been under sniper fire at a Bosnian landing.  Joe Biden has largely gotten a pass for falsely claiming to have been shot at in Iraq.

&#8220;Let&#8217;s start telling the truth,&#8221; Biden said during a presidential primary debate sponsored by YouTube last year. &#8220;Number one, [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Hillary Clinton was taken apart when she falsely claimed to have been under sniper fire at a Bosnian landing.  Joe Biden has largely gotten a pass for falsely claiming to have been shot at in Iraq.<br />
<span id="more-563"></span><br />
&#8220;Let&#8217;s start telling the truth,&#8221; Biden said during a presidential primary debate sponsored by YouTube last year. &#8220;Number one, you take all the troops out - you better have helicopters ready to take those 3,000 civilians inside the Green Zone, where I have been seven times and shot at. You better make sure you have protection for them, or let them die.&#8221; </p>
<p>As it turns out &#8220;shot at&#8221; simply met while he was shaving in a building someone fired a bullet somewhere in the neighborhood.  By this logic nearly every American living in the city has been has been shot at.</p>
<p>Some claim the comment was ignored because at the time Biden was seen as having little chance of winning the nomination running against Clinton and Obama.</p>
<p><a href="http://elections.foxnews.com/2008/09/30/unlike-clinton-biden-gets-pass-saying-shot-iraq/" target="blank">Read More</a></p>
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