Rizzbee Stitches

A little sewing...

2014-01-10T08:32:00.000-05:00

So since I don't have any good pictures of a current project, here's one that was finished for Samantha's Kindergarten Graduation. Newer things will be coming soon -waiting for a few patterns in the mail!

The pattern is Kwik Sew K3905. The only hang up I had at all was the collar. Getting that curve right was a bit challenging, otherwise, it's a piece of cake!

Sam and Will - I think I like his hair longer like this. Time to let it grow! :)

How Samantha thinks she's supposed to look for a picture.

This is probably a little closer to reality.

And this is normal. I think this is the only full length shot I got of the dress. We've definitely gotten good use out of this one for a few birthday parties, church and various whatever else. It's comfy and bright - which makes it a 6-year-old's favorite!

I left the hem a little on the long side because I wanted a long dress. Used the Blind hem on my Bernina Aurora 430 and it works like a charm (as always! I love that thing!).

Snuggle time!

2014-01-09T08:37:00.000-05:00

As they get bigger, if I get snuggle time at all with the kiddos, it's usually only on the weekend. Every once in a while I am lucky enough for one of them to fall asleep sitting with me - and it brings back so many fuzzy memories of little baby snuggles!

So have some snuggle pics from me to you on this chilly day.

Samantha and I are more silly than sleepy.

Will is the booger who slept ON me for the first year and a half of his life. He pretty well sleeps in his own bed now, though comes looking for mommy quite a bit. Which while it sometimes makes for a sleepy mommy, I'm okay with. :) I'm all too aware of the fact that these moments are fleeting.

So it's cold.

2014-01-08T13:36:00.001-05:00

Like much of the USA at the moment, South Carolina is a cold place to be.

One of the newer (and most lovely) aspects of my life is having the privilege to work at a horse barn. Samantha and I get lessons, and I get to spend an hour to two each week night with these gorgeous animals and to have some centering time.

With it being so cold, making sure those beautiful boys and girls drink enough is priority #1.

It's fun to get all of the ice out of a bucket in one piece, don't ya think?

When ice forms on the storm door, the natural thing to do is melt it with your hands (that remain for hours!)

Say hello to Penny. It's hard to get good pictures at night when they're trying to eat. :) But she's Amish and I love her.

Samantha and her instructor on a not so cold day on the pony she usually rides, Lady. We've decided a little bareback at the end of a lesson is good for the soul.

Backtracking...

2014-01-07T11:48:00.002-05:00

In the act of catching up - we took a gorgeous hike around the Table Rock, SC area the day after Thanksgiving with my stepmom and dad.

It's one of my favorite places - it's close and beautiful - fulfilling two important criteria for spur-of-the-moment hikes.

There are a ton of waterfalls - this is just a small one on the way up.

How does one woman get so lucky to have this silly guy for a dad and this silly girl for a daughter?

Will was disinclined to have pictures taken, so we have one of his and mommy's shadows and holding on to Grandfather for dear life.

I am so lucky to have so many wonderful people in my life. To have such beautiful surroundings for a post-Thanksgiving picnic and hike.

My struggles are many - like why I am suddenly one of the angriest people alive, with no good cause to show for it, but moments like these bring it back into focus for me. It doesn't take my general frustration away (let's not get me started on common core and my current inability to provide for my children and homeschool them). But it makes it bearable. It reminds me that I'm surrounded by some pretty amazing people, and for that I am truly grateful.

Wow… it's just been that long.

2014-01-06T11:58:00.003-05:00

So honestly, it's sort of embarrassing coming back to a blog that you haven't touched in 2 years. But if I've learned anything in a two-year absence it's that the truth hurts - and that doesn't mean we put a shiny layer on and make it new. Let's take the rough-around-the-edges truth, and go from there.

If I try to explain everything that's happened, we'll be here all day. The fact is, there is an elephant in this room. We had an incident with my sweet daughter 2 1/2 years ago that will sit in my gut for the rest of my life. I can't even go into detail as the court case is still pending. Yes. That kind of incident.

To say that something like that is life-changing is the understatement of the century. It's been amazingly positive in many ways, and immeasurably terrible in so many others.

But as I sat this morning, sipping my coffee, hair wet, awaiting an email reply for my stay-at-home job, I came across a blog that was just what was needed - www.sewliberated.typepad.com.

I ADORE this mamas approach to parenting. I ADORE her patterns (Esme shirt pattern is ordered and fabric is on hand - I'm ecstatic!) I'm just in love with this blog - so much so that I went back 2 years and consumed it bit by lovely bit.

It was amazing perspective for me. It was inspiring and kind, hopeful and sad. It was everything I needed in that moment.

So today - I am starting things one at a time. I don't have to have all of it done today. But I do have to move - out of my comfort zone - off of my couch - out of the "sorry for myself" state I want to be in and into the light.

One kitchen cabinet cleaned out.
One knitting project picked back up even for just a few minutes.
One choice to make one moment with my daughter and son exactly what it should be.

My children are beautiful and healthy. I have a devoted and loving husband. I am so fortunate. Do I have a daughter that will need lots of counseling and support from us as she grows? Yes. Is that doable? Yes. We take each day as it comes. We talk about it when we have to. When we don't we sit in awe of this smart and beautiful 6-year-old who is one of the two most amazing things in my life. (Not that Michael isn't amazing - he's just in a slightly different place in my heart.)

So - if you are reading this, Stop. Stop for one moment. Breathe - a deep, cleansing breath. If there's pain, acknowledge it. Cry if tears come. If there's joy, revel in it. Smile, with abandon. Who cares if anyone is watching? If there is peace, soak every ounce of it in. Close your eyes and experience all of the love that is waiting.

Let's let as many moments as will be be just like that perfect autumn afternoon,playing in the leaves, loving the last of the summer sunlight. :)

love and peace~
Sara

Yep - I'm still a kid.

2011-02-20T10:57:00.000-05:00

Not that this is really a surprise to anyone - but it's just become evident to me in the past couple of days how many ways I am still really a kid. Like:

I made apple bread this morning. I had to sit and watch it bake. Oven light on. Oven light off. I'm worse than my 1-year-old.
When outside with the kids, I'd rather run around with them, pick up sticks and hunt for fun stuff in the woods than I would check my phone.
Also when outside I LOVE to sit and just take in a small bit of ground in minute detail. I like to watch the ants crawling through the forest of grass, roots, rocks and dandelions.
Washing the car is fun - no really - it is. :D
I like to paint, color and doodle.
I still think pretzels and goldfish with apple juice make a good snack.
I like water slides and swimming. If I'm going to a pool or the ocean I expect my hair to get wet. Thus I have no time for a bikini - one piece or firmly fitted two piece it is.
I still like to fly kites - and I still want a really nice one from that tiny shop in St. Augustine, Florida.

I guess that's all I can think of at the moment - but I'm making a pact with myself to really take the time to enjoy these things more. :) why not?

Bright blue sky...

2011-02-09T09:12:00.000-05:00

Woke up this morning (okay not actually when I woke up since I am almost always up before the sun) reveling in just how blue the sky is this morning! And after checking in on Mel's blog - I'm reminded just how much promise each day has. Wasn't it from Anne of Green Gables that was said, "Tomorrow is always fresh with no mistakes."? Or something similar ;-)

I love that. Today is fresh. It has no mistakes in it yet. I haven't spent the day with a grumpy face and griping. I have the chance to smile at this day - and I'm going to take it. :-)

Now - let's see how long that will last as I begin potty training - oh my.

Just in a weird place lately...

2011-02-07T10:47:00.000-05:00

That really pretty much sums it all up. I'm in a weird place, and it's a lonely one.

I hesitate to say that I'm depressed. I don't think that's it really. It's just lonely around here lately. Michael is working nonstop now to make up for all of the not working that happened over the last few months. I'm still trying to find some work to do, and doing what I can from home.

My buddy Cathie is in Phoenix and I guess that's a big part of what's so hard! We have similarly aged kids, and we love one another's kids as our own. I miss that terribly! I think part of the reason that I miss that is that there's this weird thing since mom's gone. There's no one else who thinks my kids are the greatest thing in the world.

There's Michael's mom - but that's not the same to me because we've never had that sort of connection. So having a friend who is just as apt to brag on my kids as her own means a lot. *sigh*

Everyone else who loves me and my kids is wondnerful - they're just busy - as they should be. They have their own families, mostly with older children, and their own lives. It's really that missing mom bit, I think. She'd be here. She'd be playing with the kids. She'd be taking them to the zoo or out for ice cream. And that's all to me now.

It is what it is. I can't sit in a deep, dark place my entire life because I miss mom. I'll never stop missing her, it's just that occasionally I miss her more keenly, and that's been very evident lately.

So there. :-) In other news, Michael's mom has back surgery tomorrow - so we're praying that goes well. I'm crocheting the Tiramisu baby blanket for a baby gift that my sister wants to give to someone and trying to stay busy!!

Me.

So what does it mean...

2011-01-31T11:03:00.000-05:00

when you dream about hamburger. And I mean A. LOT. OF. HAMBURGER.

I was walking through my kitchen wondering what to make for dinner and opened the fridge and started fishing around only to find unused and spoiling several huge family packs of hamburger. I was really distraught over it. I just kept looking at it and shaking my head, trying to figure out what to do.

Ideas?

sleepier and sleepier

2010-11-05T11:48:00.000-04:00

I'm not entirely sure why I'm so tired. But I am. Really. Tired.

I could go on and on about financial stuff, how I need a vast quantity of me time, how much I hate picking up after other adults and all sorts of other funness.

But really - why? The deal is, I'm just tired. I do need some me time, but I don't currently have any way to get it. So I'll keep plugging on and hope that things iron out sooner than later - then I might go sleep for two days. :)

A little list...

2010-11-01T12:41:00.000-04:00

1. I got the work-at-home job I've been going for which required a test that's supposed to take 8-10 hours to complete.

2. I completed the test in 6 hours.

3. They gave us 5 days to finish the test.

4. I did it in two.

5. I spent three days wringing my hands wondering how I'd done.

6. After I got the job, I never got my "Welcome" and "Here's all the info you need" email.

7. I've already had to email the support team twice and it's just noon on Monday.

8. I need to email them again because I think I've already screwed up my timesheet.

9. I'm afraid to send them any more emails now. :-(

10. Nephew is here today and he and DD are at it like cats and dogs.

11. I wonder which one is the dog and which the cat.

12. I am short on sleep and overdosed on caffiene - therefore this question with my new job is making me feel like I need to go for a 12 mile run.

13. I don't do 12 mile runs anymore.

14. Maybe I need to start running again. :)

15. Or maybe a nap is a better idea.

And cuz my stepmom took it, it's pretty and I love her...

For Mel

2010-11-01T10:27:00.001-04:00

Yesterday...

2010-10-31T10:39:00.000-04:00

Spent part of the day at a 'joust' with the kiddos, SIL and nephew. Mostly a wonderful time - there was the bit where Sam decided to melt down and we spent over an hour in the car so she could calm down. But we'll move past that and remember the fun parts. :-)

SIL with the kids - yup - I didn't have a costume for Sam :(

My little pumpkin

Out knight (or Sir Knight as he called himself) on the pony ride

She had fun!

The bunnies were hard to see - it was called a petting zoo, but you weren't allowed to touch any of the animals. More of a looking zoo methinks.

Nephew slew the dragon

And the girl has an arm for the bean bag toss.

A good time was had by all.

Everyone have a happy and safe Halloween!

Red, gold and blue

2010-10-28T09:31:00.000-04:00

This picture is a couple of years old - the drive to dad's house for his 70th - but it's how I feel today - bright with hope and beauty. :-) Now let's go for a drive!

It's a new day -

2010-10-28T09:28:00.000-04:00

and I'm sleepy thanks to kiddos who decided that 1:30 am was a good time to be awake. I know it's part and parcel of being a mom. And even though I stay home with said kiddos, that doesn't mean that I'm going to get a nap today. When else am I supposed to mop the floor?? :)

Anyway- in regards to my lofty goal and stinkiness of yesterday - fortunately the stinky, mean email people decided that it was best to let well enough alone - thank heavens. So hopefully that's the last that we've heard of that.

AND - so far today is a better day in being conscientious - so far. :) As much as I'm a dreamer, I am a realist after all and recognize that it's been a pretty easy morning so far.

In reflecting on yesterday, even though my lovely DH started a firestorm with his VERY contentious (I'm loving this can you tell?) email, he stood up for himself and someone else. He called someone on the carpet who is professing certain beliefs in the public arena, then turning around off-stage and treating people just horribly. DH did it with honesty and without simply "bashing" this fellow. It was balanced with compliments for what the other guy is good at. Compared to the reply that he received it was a masterpiece. And really - I'm proud. :)

What have we come to that we all have to be so careful of someone else's ego that we can't speak the truth any longer? That's not right. People who are afraid to speak the truth (granted that we do it in a balanced and loving way if possible) aren't people who change the world - even their immediate world and circumstances. They're people who stay where they are, accepting mediocrity and never making a difference to themselves or anyone around them.

Fear is a very crippling thing, and I'm glad that DH didn't bow to it. :) I'm a proud wifey. :)

Now - to continue on in being conscientious. HA!

The best laid plans...

2010-10-27T14:03:00.000-04:00

In an effort to be conscientious, I lost my temper and yelled at everyone in my house today - wait - that didn't go as planned.

I don't like it when *real life* steps in to my goals. I like my plans.

I would appreciate it if know-it-all stinkyheads wouldn't harass my DH about his company late at night so that he will feel compelled to write ill-conceived responses under the effects of PM cold medicine, which result in stinkyhead's wife/manager writing more stinky emails at 3 am so that everyone can be even and insulting.

*sigh* So I put an end to it all this morning with a four sentence email from DH's account. Not verbatim, but the gist is - Thanks for your quick reply to the email that wasn't sent to you. I expressed my opinions to Mr. X only, and haven't and wouldn't express them elsewhere, therefore negating your accusations of slander. Don't worry about us using Mr. X's name anymore - it will not be referenced in future. Thanks, and best of luck.

Why couldn't this have just happened in the first place??? Why did it even have to turn into stinkytown with stinkyness and screw up my nicely planned morning trip to Trader Joe's?

It all goes back to the fact that the more I know, the more I find that I don't know much. I don't understand people.

What really bothers me though is that I let it get to me. I let this silly man and his silly wife-manager screw up my morning and torque me until I yelled. Grrrr. Must find more tools for emotional coping. It's been so long since I've lost my temper like this that I'm at a loss. Time to do a little more tinkering on me.

sigh

2010-10-26T09:54:00.000-04:00

You know - when I was transcribing, I typed contentious one time by mistake. The word was meant to be conscientious. Actually, auto-correct was partially to blame. :)

That seems to pretty well describe a lot of what's going on in my life right now. Where people (including me at times) should be conscientious, they are being contentious. And it's getting old. Really old.

I know I don't always understand people and their motivations - that's not my job. But there are times when it seems like the world has been turned up on its ear and I'm just looking around wondering when I can get off this silly ride.

A prime example is my daughter and her cousin. I used to watch him 4 days a week, and now it's just from time to time when his grandmother has a doctor's appointment or the like. Today is one of those days.

And - as it goes - instead of having a fun day together since they haven't seen each other in a bit - contentiousness replaces conscientiousness. *sigh* Why is he the only person on the planet that she feels compelled to scratch or bite??? I know that kids do this - I know that they have to learn how to effectively deal with their anger and frustration. The problem is that right now I'm not sure that I'm effectively dealing with my anger/frustration. :(

So today's/this week's goal for me and my house is to figure out how to help conscientiousness replace the contentiousness. (A lofty goal - I know).

SAFF '10

2010-10-25T09:05:00.000-04:00

What fun we had yesterday at the Southeastern Animal Fiber Fair! It's so amazing to see what these people do with their animal fibers. Of course, Sam had a delightful time with all the animals, especially the alpaca. Oh my!

Did I mention the llamas? Sam felt like waving to say hello. :-)

(Can I have one? guess not.) I was surprised at how affordable it is to buy a sheep. I don't know why I was surprised. I suppose I just don't see livestock as something that is attainable. Upkeep - yup, that's a different story, but it doesn't stop me from wanting my own fiber producing animals. :-)

There was a tractor show going on next door - we didn't get to stop by, but it looked like fun!

And the mustang - not ours - or anyone we know, but we had to have a picture. So thank you to the obliging (if unknowing) anonymous mustang owner whose beautiful car we photographed.

So there you have it. Michael took time away from deer season to come spend some time with us and my family - and it was wonderful!

Let the upswing begin!!

2010-10-04T10:56:00.000-04:00

As you've gathered, the past month has been rough. But I'm in firm belief that the upswing has begun. Even though DH's back is causing him some pain, he's working today - woo hoo!! Income? What's this thing you speak of? LOL

I'm still on the job hunt, but at least there may be an end in sight for the bulk of the $ woes. As for the rest of it, it's getting better by the day. Catching the kiddos coloring on Sam's WHITE bed today was just par for the course. :-) At least it was in yellow!

Busted lips...

2010-09-24T08:42:00.000-04:00

Okay - this is completely petty - but I'm gonna whine for just a second. Kiddo 2 busted my lip last night! And when I say busted, I mean it. Big nasty mess, doesn't stop bleeding for 20 minutes, probably shoulda had stitches but oh well - busted.

I might not mind so much if it weren't the second time this has happened in less than a year. And the problem is that it's all because of my stupid crooked front teeth. If the edge of that tooth didn't stick out just a bit, there'd be nothing to bust the lip on. It might hurt, but it wouldn't split wide open. *sigh*

So there - I'm done. Adding invisalign to the list of wants in my head.

Missing my buddy

2010-09-23T17:53:00.000-04:00

4.5 years ago my mom passed away. She was my buddy. That was the first thing that my step-dad said to me when she was gone, "You're going to really miss your buddy."

He was right. I do. Every day.

This week has really been rough. The 21st was mom's birthday. One more reason to miss my buddy. Then today, my other buddy moved. :-(

Nine months after my mom passed away we got a new neighbor next door. This is always a worrisome event. It's a rental house, and it's relatively cheap. We've had a string of redneck, howl-at-the-moon-at-3 am kind of folks. Then this family moves in. They're not from 'round here. They're from Arizona.

I hesitate to introduce myself, but a couple of weeks after they move in, she does. Her name is Cathie and we spend the next half hour chatting. Both of us have other places we need to be, but we couldn't stop talking. Over time, we get to be friends, really good friends. Before I realized what happened, I had another buddy.

She's the kind of person that actually laments never having had the chance to meet my mom. She makes me laugh. She says things I would NEVER say!! She inspires me to strive to be more conscious of the things I say and do. She believes in me more than I believe in myself.

And...

Today I lost my buddy. :-(

Fortunately, I've only lost her to Phoenix. But I'm going to miss her terribly. I'm getting weepy just thinking of it. I keep looking out the window - wondering where the van is, looking for her kids. And it makes me sad.

It can be okay though. I'll miss our Sunday thrift store shopping, and having someone to go to Target with at 8pm, but at least I can hop on a plane to go see Cat - that's a definite improvement. So I'll see somewhere new and hang on to this buddy.

Buddy Mom, meet Buddy Cat.

I'm an addict...

2010-09-20T08:20:00.002-04:00

I guess I have an addictive personality - in a very specific and weird way. When I find something like I like to read, I become ridiculously addicted. Terry Pratchett and Elizabeth Peters both have their very own shelves in my library. I have to own everything they've written, and I'm getting close!

My most recent reading addiction as actually been a blog, which is funny because I have a hard time reading my friend's blogs regularly (sorry guys!) I really am the worst. I'll pop in with a random comment and they'll smack immediately back with, "There you are! We thought you'd fallen off the face of the earth!"

However, The Pioneer Woman got my attention. The story of how she met her hubby (Black heels to tractor wheels), the recipes, photography tips, homeschooling info and everything else just make me go all fuzzy inside!

So here's to my silly addiction... head on over and see if she can make an addict out of you too!

Long time, no post.

2010-09-19T08:37:00.005-04:00

Yeah - it goes that way doesn't it? Well, here's a little snapshot of what I've been up to since 2008!

Nope there isn't a lot of knitting, sewing or any other thing similar in there. *sigh* But that's okay. We've been having a great time of it!

Michael William Bouvier Jr. was born 09/12/09. On 8/26/10 we had to have a tumor removed from his finger - that would have been a harrowing experience if not for the people at Shriner's Hospital for Children here in Greenville, SC. If you ever get the chance, please support these people - they really do the most amazing things!

Sam's still... well, Sam. :-) She's a girlie-girl, then she's a tom-boy. She's a mess! And we love her all the more for it.

Maybe I'll get to some more posting here in the near future and resurrect this nearly-dead blog! But for now, I have kiddos to feed!

Connor's Cap Day

2008-12-06T08:48:00.002-05:00

Well - Connor's Cap Day at his school was a great success! We were just a couple of hats short of having one for every kid in the school!

Here's a video of all the hats strung up between the basketball goals!

It's so exciting!

2008-12-01T13:12:00.001-05:00

We've been working on Connor Caps for almost a month now. (yup time does fly!) Today was deadline day, although we know that there are packages that won't arrive until tomorrow or later. Here's what was waiting for Beth at the post office this morning! 28 packages. Most of them with at least 2 caps inside (some of them have more like 7 or 10!) I can't wait to see the final total and all the hats!!