Rookie Moms

Book review for new parents: The Wonder Weeks

2013-05-24T18:27:14Z

When we posted a list of 9 books for new moms and dads, I left out a book recommended by New Jersey reader Rebecca Cain, The Wonder Weeks because I had never heard of it and wanted to learn more. I asked Rebecca to tell me more about the book and she’s done us all the favor of providing a great summary. Here’s what she said:

In my previous corporate life, I thrived on calendars and schedules, project plans and milestone-delineated goals. I thought parenting would have at least some similarities –read the how-to, lay out the timeline, execute, goal achieved. (You’re laughing derisively now, as you should be.) Since my husband frequently travels internationally for work, for weeks at a time, I outsourced much of our prenatal reading to him since he’d otherwise be struggling to decipher foreign language newscasts. He was great at summarizing the 5 things that we absolutely must do –or avoid doing – to ensure our impeding addition would be happy, healthy, sleeping, performing calculus in her head, etc. Only, our kid rarely fit the descriptions we’d crib-noted, or her temperament just didn’t lend itself to their prescriptions. A few weeks in, I understood the roller coaster called “newborn” I’d just boarded didn’t come with a calendar function.

I wish instead I’d had my husband read The Wonder Weeks: How to stimulate your baby’s mental development and help him turn his 10 predictable, great, fussy phases into magical leaps forward, as I believe that armed with the insight of this piece I would have been more confident as a new parent, and more curious, rather than anxious, about how my new baby was experiencing the world. And, I would have had one of those project plans (at least in broad brush strokes) I used to love so much when life could be cleanly displayed in Excel (wistful sigh).

Based on 35 years of research by Dutch husband-and-wife academic team Hetty van de Rijt and Frans Plooij, The Wonder Weeks offers age-based baby behavior insight focused on 10 distinct developmental “leaps” from birth through 20 months. In addition to laying out when (as in, which weeks, by gestational age) you can expect your baby to be most difficult, they also present diary entries from 15 families at each leap, and offer optimism that the “wonder week” will end with positive growth for your child. Quite frankly, it’s the closest thing to a crystal-ball-for-parents I’ve seen.

A mom with a slightly older baby suggested The Wonder Weeks book to me when I was at my wit’s end with a clingy, crying, non-sleeping, 8-week-old, wondering if my previously lovely baby had undergone a complete personality change. “Oh, that’s a Wonder Week,” she said, almost off-handedly. “There’s another one soon. Get the book, there’s a calendar.”

A calendar?!

Skeptical of the book’s predictive power, so I first signed up for the free alarm service, which promised to alert me by email to the next leap a few days before it should commence. A few weeks later I received my first alert; two days after that she was well into the next leap, with its associated clinginess, crying, and crankiness (the “three C’s”).

Convinced, I bought the app ($1.99 for iOS and Android) and the full e-book ($12.99 on your iOS device). You can also purchase individual chapters for only the ages you want; since the Wonder Weeks are timed according to a baby’s due date rather than birth date, I’ve found the timer and the app really helpful too, since they do the math for me.

According to the authors:

we found that, surprisingly, all normal, healthy babies are more tearful, troublesome, demanding, and fussy at the same ages … From our research, we are now able to predict, almost to the week, when parents can expect their babies to go through of these ‘fussy phases.’…During these periods, a baby cries for a good reason … [this] is a book on how to understand and cope with your baby when he is difficult and how to enjoy him most as he grows.

In addition to plotting out when you can more or less expect Junior to be more challenging than usual, in each chapter van de Rijt and Plooij outline the behavioral signals of the upcoming leap, and the new abilities your baby will start to exhibit afterwards. They also offer ideas on how to engage these specific emerging abilities, so that playtime helps baby make better sense out of what’s going on in his brain. To help you later remember these blurry but beautiful times, the book provides a diary for you to record your own child’s progress through the leaps. Overall, they present a cheerful and upbeat approach to understanding your baby, with little of the “heed us or else” tone I’ve noticed in many other parenting books.

Beyond the peek into the future and the modicum of forward-planning it affords my otherwise anything-can-happen-with-a-baby life, I appreciate the positive support and “light at the end of the tunnel” The Wonder Weeks offers for each of the leaps. You feel like the authors are actually looking out for you and for your baby, and really just want you both to have the happiest experience you can. When I receive the “leap alert,” I remind myself to be more patient, more understanding, that my daughter is going through a confusing time and that’s why she’s crying/cranky/clingy – and, most importantly, it won’t last forever. The calendar says so.

You can find a hard-copy of The Wonder Weeks on Amazon (easier to share with your partner), a Kindle version (half the price), or purchase individual chapters on the authors’ website.

Superfun gift idea: Dad’s Book of Awesome Projects

2013-05-23T21:28:37Z

Mike Adamick is a San Francisco Dad that we’ve known since his first grader was a baby. We featured her doing normal baby stuff for a day, and I still love that post. In addition to thoughtful essays, his blog is stuffed full of creative adventures, crafty projects, and homemade clothing that he makes for and with his daughter. So it is no surprise that he wrote a wicked cool book with more of the same (minus the fondness for Broadway shows).

I was lucky to receive an early copy of Dad’s Book of Awesome Projects: From Stilts and Super-Hero Capes to Tinker Boxes and Seesaws, 25+ Fun Do-It-Yourself Projects for Families, and it is all that and a bag of chips.

My husband and older sons took it away from me and flipped through the book before I could get started. Milo was the first to ask if we could make everything in it THIS WEEKEND. And so we started a few projects.

He had his eye on this balance board project (the second in the book) and took it upon himself to make it without help!

The results of his efforts were adorable but flawed since he used only cardboard.

Within 24 hours, RookieDad Alec had obtained the proper materials and made a real rolling wooden balance board and started the second project on our family wishlist, the Hidden Book Stash.

I can’t say enough good things about this book but I will try. Dad’s Book of Awesome Projects is a terrific collection of projects both realistic and ridiculous (with a strong leaning toward the realistic) that kids and parents will enjoy together. It would make a fun Father’s Day gift or just a “let’s see how much stuff we can do with this Summer Vacation” present. Buy it for someone you love along with the materials for circus stilts or a bow and arrow.

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I received a free copy of this book that my boys are working their way through. This review/love letter was not sponsored. (This post contains affiliate links.) Mike Adamick kicks ass in the best possible way.

Pizza to the rescue. Again.

2013-05-22T21:07:30Z

This is the second post in our series sponsored by Annie’s Homegrown.

When Julian started playing soccer, I suddenly understood why fast food is so dang popular with families in America. Working parents and afterschool activities combine in a way that makes the dinner production incredibly challenging. Now Scarlett is in gymnastics and Julian has a baseball schedule that makes walking in the door at 6 pm a frequent occurrence for us. Hence, I have my eyes wide open for fast and easy dinners that don’t include a side of fries. My kids won’t eat burgers anyway, so even if I drove by an In N Out on the way home from one of their sporting events, I’d be the only one who ordered something. (Seriously, what did I do wrong?)

Enter Pizza Night.

We do enjoy pizza as a family at many of our local, fancy pizza restaurants. Plain for the kids; potato, pesto, and pancetta for the adults. Something like that. But more often than not, we just want to get home, get them in the bath, and ready for bed. Often, I feel I deserve take out and don’t want to worry about how to make Indian or Thai food work for my picky eater. That’s when I look to the freezer.

It’s not June Cleaver-approved, but it makes me totally happy to have grown up take-out for the adults and Annie’s Frozen Pizza for the kids. That’s right, June. I make two separate meals. Actually I don’t even make them: I order one and heat up the other. It’s called modern family life. Get to know it.

This rising crust pizza bakes up in my beloved supersized toaster oven while I get out drinks and utensils and yell at people who need to take their cleats off before they come in the house. The crust is whole wheat and the cheese is made from milk that’s 100% hormone free. That is to say, it’s quality ingredients without any work on my part. Raw carrots and apple slices on the side and I’m done.

I’m a barbecue chicken pizza lover myself, but no one in my house will agree to that, so it’s Four Cheese for them.

Don’t miss Heather’s great lessons on easy roasted vegetables and other sides that make Pizza Night even healthier.

Thanks to Annie’s Homegrown for sponsoring this post — and if you’re hot to stock your freezer for easy dinners, click over to download a $1.50 coupon from them.

Tech Tuesday: Use an app to save kid art

2013-05-21T18:46:38Z

My kindergartner is the most prolific artist in the house. Allow me to present to you five from his recent series of monsters and beasts (incredibly adorable until you realize that they’re all holding weapons and shooting poison from their spiky appendages).

I really love ~~all~~ most of what he creates but I can’t possibly store all his artwork. I mean, really, we only have so much wall and shelf space.

Enter the kid art storage app!

I started using Artkive to manage our ever-growing art collection earlier this year at the recommendation of CoolMomTech. It really works for me. I photograph each drawing right into the app and then categorize it by artist, schoolyear, and date. From there, I can make custom digital or printed albums. It also lets me share among circles of his interested art fans.

I’m already grateful to have a place to put sweet little recyclables like this toddler masterpiece from Sawyer; I might feel nostalgic for it if I tossed it out.

Wait. Is that upside-down?

I have heard of other apps worth trying out: Art My Kid Made (check out this review on cnet) and Evernote (which I hear does everything but I haven’t figured it out yet), but I’m pretty satisfied with the features on Artkive.

Find ArtKive for FREE on iTunes.

What’s your strategy for saving and organizing kid art? I’ll share some non-app ideas in another post.

This is 40

2013-05-20T20:25:05Z

“You might live to be 104 years old,” my mom said to me recently.

“Please, no,” I joked, thinking of all the ailments and losses I would have to endure to get to that age. On the bright side, I suggested to her, if a one-hundred year life is the new normal, maybe we could relax a little about work-life balance. There’s plenty of time for everything.

When my children are grown, I can kick off a new career path, developing my skills from age 50 to 60 and then reaching the top of my game at 68, enjoying a position of authority and mastery through my 70s at which point I will begin to wind down til I pick up a few hours of interesting work here and there in my early 80s. Finally, at 84, I’ll be ready to rest and focus on self-care. Twenty golden years ought to be enough, don’t you think?

The thing is, we don’t know when the last day is.

When Julian was born, he had a pair of pajamas that I hated because the phrase on the chest read, “If they could just stay little,” which is apparently the Carter’s layette tagline. I felt like I was waiting for him to get bigger, to smile, to sit up.

These stupid jammies wanted him to remain a wobbly-headed cross-eyed newborn forever? Eff that.

Now my kids are at an age that I love. They still need me terribly, but not every second. They can buckle their own seat belts and put on their own pants. They invite me into their secret clubs and make me drawings. Some days I think I want to freeze them at this age because I know this happy balance of dependence and independence won’t last forever. Suddenly I have empathy for the author of that embroidered message, “If they could just stay little.” It must have been written by a parent my age, or even one who has 30 years on me.

Today’s my fortieth birthday. It’s got me thinking.

My 70-year old self would probably look at my life today and say three things:

1) You should have worn the bikini. As much as I dislike my lower abdomen with it’s stretched out uneven flesh, it’s not going to get any better. I’m a native Californian who spent her teenage summers unselfconsciously in a bikini. After Julian was born, I converted to a one-piece to hide my squishy belly. I’m sure as my body ages, I will look back at my strong, cancer-free, 40-year old body and wish I could have brought it with me into the future. If you are reading this and you are 26, you should probably go put on a bikini right now. When you’re 40, you might wish you had not wasted anytime being embarrassed about the way you look.*

2) Get a mammogram. I didn’t need Angelina Jolie to add this to my to-do list. It was already there. Laying around my house somewhere is the doctor’s order for the test, requested by me when I was 39. I set out to do 40 self-care tasks in the forty days leading up to my birthday, and I’m getting close. I’ve had a facial, seen the doctor, made a dermatologist appointment to get my moles checked, donated a “stretch” sum of money to a cause that matters to me, increased my water intake, improved the ergonomics of my workspace, and more. I know, I know, getting my breasts squished by an x-ray machine is simply a sensible way to celebrate one’s birthday.

3) If they could just stay little! Seriously, lady? Did you just quote that trite and stupid phrase to my face? Oh, wait, it’s me talking to myself. Yes, I’m sure at 70 I’ll be wistful for the days of my grade-school aged children, and that’s what “little” will mean to me by then. A major perspective shift for me this year is to realize that it is a privilege to get older, and not one that everyone gets to enjoy. When 8-year old Martin Richard died in the Boston Marathon bombing, I thought about how grateful I need to be for every age and stage I get to have with my children and the rest of my family. I lose a lot of sleep worrying about accidental death and random violence. My husband and I ventured through our 20s and 30s together and I am feeling lucky to turn 40 alongside him. The bright side of my neuroses is that is that every day that neither of us gets hit by a bus gets counted by me as a win.

My wisdom ends here. I’ve been a parent long enough to hold a PhD in it, but someone already took that title. I’ve been a woman long enough to know that it’s time to treat myself to a couple of bras that fit. And I’ve been a Gen Xer long enough to have worn Flashdance-inspired dance clothes to school in the 80s, learned to swing dance in my 20s, developed a website for my wedding guests in 2001, and now wonder if the aches and knots in my right forearm from my mouse-clicking and iPhone addiction will lead my entire generation to early arthritis.

This is 40 going to the beach. Yes, in a bikini. No, you can’t see it.

What do you think your future self would tell you?

*A bikini is a metaphor in this scenario. Maybe your bikini is a short haircut; opening a retail store; a tattoo.

My new fashion role model is Holly

2013-05-17T19:47:53Z

I struggle with figuring out what to wear. Before kids, I didn’t know. And ten years after buying this What Not to Wear book (and gestating three humans) I sure don’t know any better.

So, I’m on a quest to figure out my style along with realistic, affordable ways to get there without shopping. And then I found this blog: My Year of Fabulous!

Wow! Holly is a girl after my own heart and totally doing something about it. After having her three children, she grew tired of dressing like a meth addict every day and came up with a plan (a kind of nutty “one activity for every year of your baby’s first life” kind of plan, but that’s why I love it!).

Each month, she’s going full-force into a new style. This month, she’s knee-deep in American Classic wearing the styles of the preppy and the presidential. January was sexy tough Rock n Roll, February was eclectic Euro Chic, March was Mod, and April was Bohemian. And we don’t know what’s next!

She’s got photos of her different outfits and reflections on how they make her feel. She’s having fun but keeping the goal in mind. And ps she lives on a FARM.

How does she keep it affordable? Read her secret to letting her $500 clothing budget last all year.

I discovered My Year of Fabulous from Ain’t No Mom Jeans.

Baby wipes in every room? Yes please.

2013-05-16T19:11:34Z

This post about cleaning up life’s messes was sponsored by Huggies.

In 2005, I purchased a refillable tub of Huggies baby wipes that I still use. Last week, I intended to purchase the latest formulation of Huggies Wipes (the ones with NEW Triple Clean action) but instead, I bought EIGHT NEW TUBS! Holy cats, sometimes online shopping really is too confusing for me.

In all likelihood, I will donate the bonus tubs to Help a Mother Out to help needy baby bums, but part of me was at least a little excited to plop the tubs in every room in my house (and car!) so I’ll never be more than 10 feet from clean hands and faces.

{Cue the evil genius music}

These are the boys I live with:

When I first became a mom, I thought that wipes were just for cleaning butts, but now that my kids bring home a series of little messes, I think we’ll have some active containers long after the diaper days are over.

These are the messes I typically tackle with wipes:

FOOD: yogurt goatee, buttery fingers, “I do it myself” applesauce in the hair
Bodily fluids: Diaper stuff, eye gunk, and super snotty noses
Outside dirt: garden variety black fingernail stuff
Paint: finger paint, face paint, spray paint, you name it!

I keep wipes tubs in the kitchen, nursery and minivan. I subscribe to a steady supply of wipes refills so I never run out.

Last month, Milo and some buddies turned a lovely backyard birthday party into a mud-pit in a matter of minutes. What the?? He needed the hose (see above) and then still had to come home naked wrapped in a blanket. His clothes required some aggressive hosing and they were also saved. Of course, some messes are too big for wipes alone, but I was happy to have them after touching this kid and squeezing him into my car!

Do you have any creative uses for baby wipes?

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This post was sponsored by Huggies. All experiences and opinions are my own. They meant to send me a new tub of wipes for testing but I accidentally ordered eight. Win win, I say.

Huggies Natural Care® Wipes with NEW Triple Clean* layers are gentle on baby’s skin and thick enough to clean. Interested in trying out this new product for yourself? You can become an Official Huggies® Tester at Huggies.com/Tester.

For coupons and rewards, visit the Huggies® Test Town! Or check out the Huggies® Facebook fan page to learn more.

Is my baby ready for a toddler bed?

2013-05-16T19:07:35Z

One of our local experts offered to field this question, which comes up over and over again: For the past few days my son (2) won’t stop climbing out of his crib, and I’m afraid he will get hurt! Does this mean he’s ready for a toddler bed? Won’t he just get out of that too and play with his toys? Any tips will help!

Here’s what Stef from AskaNanny.com said:

Yes, this child is ready, and your child might be as well. For the sake of their safety, and your sanity, when they begin to climb out of the crib it is time. Sure, you may be able to find ways of keeping them in, but toddlers are determined and love a challenge! So I strongly suggest that when your toddler (over the age of 2) begins to climb out of their crib or requests to sleep in a big bed like yours, be ready with a few easy ways to ease the transition out of the crib:

1) Invest in a toddler-sized bed. I know a toddler bed has short-lived role, but it’s a very important one, and will help the most in the transition. By offering a bed that they can get in and out of on their own, you boost their sense of independence and ownership. Toddlers are all about “me do it” and “mine” after all, so play to these motivations and get them excited about their new bed. Other bonuses of the toddler bed: it’s a shorter fall if they roll out or are just fooling around (I would still suggest a thick rug or foam matting though); you can’t fit in there and therefore falling asleep with them in the middle of the night won’t happen; toddler beds are cheaper than a twin mattress set and bed frame; and, you can use all your crib sheets a little bit longer if you chose a frame that works with your crib mattress!

2) Transition at the right time. Understanding what’s happening with their development will help you to choose a perfect time to make the transition. Most “terrible twos” rear their head just before the second birthday, and then again at the tail end of the second year. (So 21 – 23 months and 30 to 36 months they may be less flexible and open to change.) Just-turned-2 year olds are usually rather pleasant and open to new ideas. Of course you know your toddler best, so when you feel like you can come up for air and the pre-2 screaming and tantrums are subsiding, that’s when I would introduce the bed – before the 2.5 tantrums come in. That said, make sure there are no other major transitions happening in their life at the time, like moving daycare classrooms or the birth of a sibling.

3) Let them pick out the bedding. This goes along with #1. Taking ownership is what toddlers do best: once they claim it, it belongs to them and no one else. Awesome! I use this to my advantage when transitioning toddlers for anything, really, by offering a choice. So when they are potty training, you pick two potties and let them choose the one they want. Same with moving to a toddler bed. Pick two comforters you like and have them make the final decision. (Even if you have bedding at home for the toddler bed, it really is important to have them pick a new blanket or sheets for their bed.) Limit it to two choices and offer the choice away from the bedding aisle, or she will automatically want the ones on the shelf and not in your hands.

4) Make a game plan for when they get out of bed. Whatever you decide, install a baby gate on their door. (I would do it before you even introduce the bed to normalize it.) Choices for addressing the exodus: 1) Ignore and let play. With this choice you will need to baby proof the heck out of his room, and then when he passes out on the floor, pick him up and put him in his bed night after night until he just goes there to pass out on his own. 2) Go in and put back in bed. Every time you see him get out, go in and put him back in bed. Do this without much emotion and talking. Just repeat the same phrase “It’s time for you to sleep,” or something like that. This is the toddler version of sleep training (like you may have done when they were a baby, going in every 5, 10, 15 min). Be supportive and firm, but shower with positive attention before bed and in the morning.

These ideas are just the tip of the iceberg! If you would like more tips head over to Stef’s AskaNanny.com post “Ready for a Toddler Bed?”! Stef is the expert nanny behind the parenting advice website AskaNanny.com, where questions about your 0 to 3 year old get answered for free. She lives in San Francisco with her highschool sweetheart and her two boisterous children. Ask her your question today at unravelme@askananny.com or on twitter @askananny #thenannyisin

5 tips for a cheap(er) third birthday party

2013-05-16T17:02:23Z

From the oldies files!

We threw a real birthday party for Holden this year and we tried to do it on the cheap. The funny thing was that we had a great plan — some of it was even well-executed — and we still spent more than $150. Ouch!

I think with hindsight, I could cut that to $55ish.

So, learn from my successes and my mistakes and throw a super-cheap birthday party for your three-year old!

Limit the guest list. It cannot be overstated that the easiest way to cut costs is to cut guests. Holden wanted a “big party” so we started off with an evite of all his friends (who come with parents at this age), our whole family (most of whom live out of state and wouldn’t come), my coworkers, and all our friends with kids (who, of course, come with kids).The evite was up to 37 adults before I asked WTF: Is Holden’s idea of a BIG PARTY even this big? On the brink of sending the message; we decided, no, and chose a few kids who were his close friends (the ones he would choose) and their folks. Ahhh, better.
Choose a free place! We’ve been to some super fun third birthday parties this year: an all bouncy house party, a play space rental party, a pirate themed party (also with bouncy houses), a kickas$ backyard festival, and had our own fantasies of petting zoos and king cobras. Luckily, we asked the kid where he wanted to celebrate and he chose the local (and free!) playground with picnic tables. Yeehaw.We had a biking theme and brought Holden’s trike and “wobbly bike” for others to try out and encouraged his guests to do the same. It was terrific. Between the kids, we had a scooter and another tricycle to add to the mix. Kids were great about sharing and trying out the different sets of wheels.
Let the kid choose the menu (within reason) After all, kid food is cheap food. I offered some choices I could live with: sandwiches, pizza, or Mexican and Holden chose (emphatically) sandwiches. When pressed for specifics, he wanted PBJ. Hecka cheap. He also asked for dry cereal, but I decided that was too weird.The morning of, we cut about 5 sandwiches into quarters and then panicked about what the adults would eat. I went to the grocery store for a last minute run on beverages (water bottles, juice boxes, milk boxes), berries, water melon, green salad to the tune of $83. I think a little pre-planning might have helped.You don’t need to cater the party to the taste of the adults. Worst case, they leave a little hungry and don’t think that three-year olds eat very well. So what. Maybe they’ll snack before coming next year. Best case, they appreciate your simplicity and think that the kid planned a menu of his favorites (in this case it was true!).
Limit the decorations.
Again, this is a place where you can go unnecessarily overboard. For about $30 at the party supply outlet, I got 3 helium balloons (best investment!), blue plates, blue cups, blue napkins, plastic cutlery, a teensy 3 candle, and a white table covering. The solid blue stuff was good because it can all be reused (Hanukkah!!) but we really only used the plates. All the food was finger food (only one mom touched our green salad with a plastic fork, the rest was undisturbed) and drink boxes. I could have probably gotten away with spending $5 on just the balloons, plates, candle, and table coverings.
(However this pad of animal face placemats is $8 on Amazon and I still use them occasionally to entice my kids to sit down at their spots.)
Bake your own mini cupcakes. For $5 rather than my $42, you can bake some tasty mini cupcakes if time permits. Instead, I went to one of my favorite bakeries and custom ordered (the minimum) 24 cupcakes. We also baked cookies (because he very specifically asked for cake and cookies, but the kids didn’t go for them, so they were tragically wasted.

My grand total was $257ish = $83 (food) + $30 (decorations + $42 (cupcakes) + $0 (location) + $7 (favors of sand toys to use today and take away) virtual $100 (invitations)

My revised grand total $55ish = $45 (less food) + $5 (less decorations) + $5 (cheaper cupcakes or $12 for a dozen brownie bites) + $7 (reusable favors) $0 (for location and invitations)

Tech Tuesday: How to read blogs without Google Reader

2013-05-14T22:03:00Z

Got RSS?

If you have a Google Reader account full of blogs you like to read, like I do, you probably already know that this feature of Google will be going away soon. Because I like so many blogs on Facebook, this news is not quite as devastating to me as it might have been a few years ago, but for those of you who like all of your blog feeds neatly stacked in one place, it’s time to explore a new solution.

If you mostly click around the web haphazardly, perhaps you’ll consider setting up an account where you can see and organize the blogs you want to follow. RSS readers are a nice way to browse, tag things for later reference, and discover new blogs to follow. RIP Google Reader.

What is a feed reader?

How does it work behind the scenes? Who cares. The key benefit is that I don’t have to remember to seek out the blogs I enjoy. New bloggy content automatically comes to my RSS Reader when it’s posted, so I never miss a post.

When I’m on a new website and I get that familiar feeling, you know, like “I like this site, but I’ll probably forget about it in a few minutes. I don’t WANT to forget about it, but I know myself, and well, I’ll forget,” that’s when I try to subscribe to the blog.

I look for the word “subscribe” or for this icon. Then done.

On RookieMoms.com, for example, the “feed” icon lives in the upper right-hand corner, next to our other social media icons. When you click on it, you go to a page that allows you to choose some different ways to subscribe. (Don’t choose Google Reader. Or if you do, then you’ll want to export your Google Reader account before the end of June into something new.) If you prefer email, select “Get Rookie Moms delivered by email.” That means that every time we post something new, you’ll get the post in an email. You don’t have to remember to come here.

RSS in a post-Google-Reader world

Feedly

Another option for keeping up with blogs that is gaining crazy popularity is Feedly. It’s a website and a mobile app that allows you to follow and discover content sources you love. I have the app, and I imported my Google Reader account there, but find it a bit difficult to use. Apparently I’m the dummy because 30 million Google Reader customers have already transitioned and David Pogue from the New York Times recommends it. It does look very pretty.

Bloglovin’

Another tool to play with is Bloglovin’. Here’s how they introduce themselves:

Reading blogs can be a pain in the ass. We created bloglovin´ so you wouldn’t have to visit un-updated blogs, open ten windows in your browser, or forget your favorite blogs web-addresses. With bloglovin´ we wanted to make your blog reading fun and easy.

Sounds good to me.

FeedInbox

FeedInbox is pretty much the same thing. And finally, there are bookmarking tools that can support your daily routines. Some of you have said you use Pinterest for this purpose. I should note, also, that most websites have feeds that you can subscribe to; it doesn’t have to be a “blog”. Go to the very bottom of the NYTimes.com website and you’ll see a small link that says RSS. On the page that follows, you’ll find options to subscribe to feeds for the home page of that site; US News; World News; Education; Arts, etc.

Flipboard

If you like to see a glossy, magazine-like experience, a handful of apps will do that for you, integrating your existing social media accounts with your feeds to produce one cool, personalized magazine that includes links your friends have shared, their photos and updates, and the blogs you’ve specifically added. See Flipboard. (It’s super cool!)

Ok, your turn. How do you keep up with blogs you want to follow?

How did your Mother’s Day stack up?

2013-05-13T18:32:02Z

I just read a novel in which one of the characters was an economist who specialized in the study of Happiness. He had created some formula, which I won’t be able to document exactly right, but the jist of it was Happiness = Reality – Expectations. Maybe there was some more complicated math in there, but the simple way I’ve captured it here makes enough sense to me. If your expectations are greater than reality, you end up with a negative number in the Happiness department. Unexpected awesomeness is the recipe for total bliss. That is, when what we expect is nothing special — and our experience exceeds it.

Going into Mother’s Day, I felt bombarded by media messages about it being the most beautiful day ever, and I felt worried for moms who tend to have high expectations. When a friend on Facebook posted about wanting brunch and jewelry, I wrote over on the Giggle blog that we are responsible for our own happiness, so if you want those things, I think you should probably secure them for yourself.

I loved several of the posts I read about Mother’s Day, and the things my real-life friends said aloud, about the confounding feeling of wanting to be left (the hell) alone, but also wanting to do the fun parts of parenting, the things that make us feel loved: receiving hand-drawn cards and snuggling. Grocery runs were on many women’s lists of things they’d like to have erased from their typical Sunday responsibilities.

My day was 100% satisfying. With Ryan’s help, Scarlett bought me a tiny stuffed hedgehog that I once said was cute in a Barnes & Noble, which showed me how much she wanted to please and surprise me. Julian had picked out a baseball hat for his Little League team that I can wear to his games. In Ryan’s words, “Welcome to Your-kid-is-old-enough-to-choose-gifts-for-you Day.”

In the morning, I took my mom and my children to a butterfly exhibit in San Francisco’s Golden Gate Park. The kids resisted at first, but when I reminded them it was my special day, they stopped complaining. Back at home I ate leftovers I was looking forward to while Ryan prepared lunch for the kids. In the afternoon, we took a walk to get fancy popsicles — mine was Burnt Caramel. Afterward, my husband took the kids to the park and as they headed out the front door, he called out to me that I’d find wine chilling in the fridge. For dinner, we had Indian take out, my fave, which he ordered and picked up. I noticed that he had bought several dark chocolate treats and stashed them in my normal spots, and I selected one to eat while we caught up on The Office after putting the kids to bed.

Mother’s Day is frankly not that important to me, and maybe that’s why I was so pleased with my day. Also? Since I had already decided I wasn’t responsible for discipline for the day, there were less power struggles than usual. How did your Mother’s Day go? Were your expectations met or exceeded?

You’re so effing special!

2013-05-09T22:24:47Z

Happy Mother’s Day, y’all. I wanted to share this photo of my mama and me singing karaoke Radiohead Creep (see the monitor? awesome!) and remind you about our unusually high number of giveaways happening right now.

New new mama? Win a breast pump from Philips AVENT.
Got a bigger kid? Win a child size mattress from IntelliBED.
Photo-taking mother? Win this amazing Canon DSLR camera and Epiphanie bag.
Into tech gadgets? Win $100 gift card to Microsoft Stores.

Rules and restrictions vary… so read the rules and good luck!

Phew. You’re so effing special.