Joyride clears the pack. Photo by Sharkey.

Current Standings:

1. High Rollers (3-0)
2. Break Neck Betties (2-1)
3. Guns N Rollers (1-2)
4. Heartless Heathers (0-3)

The first and fourth-place teams will play each other in semis, then the second and third-place teams. That means the High Rollers play the Heathers on Friday, May 4th, and the Betties play GNR on Saturday, May 5th. Winners play for the Season Seven Championship. Losers play for third place.

Any predictions?

Skater Resources

Last weekend was Squid Vicious’ last game with Rose City. Good luck, Squid!

Squid jams for GNR. Photo by Sharkey.

Since the last time we checked in, Mel Mangles has returned to GNR, and Scratcher in the Eye has returned to the Heartless Heathers. That could shake semis up a little.

(If you want this information in real time, btw, you should follow us @rosecityrollers on Twitter. We’re not even that annoying, and there’s good dirt sometimes.)

Coming Up

Semis will be awesome, but they’re a month away, and we’ve got really good stuff happening in April. How about the first Wheels of Justice bout of the season? Chicago’s coming to town on April 14th, and we want the Memorial Coliseum to be filled with purple. Skaters have tickets with no fees, and they’d love to sell you a few. As a matter of fact, I have some on me right now.  Tickets are also available online.

Make your plans and your costume. We have a reputation as some of the craziest fans in roller derby, so let’s show Chicago what’s what.

Pegacorns unite! 

Hard to believe, but half of the Rose City Rollers’ regular home team season has been played. Each team has played twice, and will play one more time before semifinals. At semifinals, the first and fourth-place teams will play each other, as well as the second and third-place teams. Winners of semifinal games go to the championship bout, and losers play for third place.

The current rankings after two games are:

1. High Rollers (2-0)
2. Break Neck Betties (1-1)
3. Guns N Rollers (1-1)
4. Heartless Heathers (0-2)

We haven’t listed out retirements for quite some time, (December 9th? Geez!) though we’ve been trying to keep you updated on Facebook and Twitter. Like us and/or follow us for the details in real time.

The following people have officially stepped down or retired since then. Boo:

• Bella Massacre
• Slim Sheety
• Butcher Block
• Skintastic Dynomite
• Devaskating Deva
• Uff-da
• Slaughtra

Goodie Two Skates, Cadillac, Megahurtz, and SheRex have all come back. Yay!

Let’s see: what else is going on?

Dates to remember:

March 10th: Wreckers Orientation

March 16th: Betties vs. Derby Liberation Front (Seattle)

March 17th: Heartless Heathers vs. High Rollers

March 18th: Rosebuds – Rainbow Bites vs. Undead Avengers

March 30th: Heartless Heathers vs. Terminal City (Vancouver, B.C.)

March 31st: Break Neck Betties vs. Guns N Rollers

April 14th: Wheels of Justice vs. Windy City (Chicago)

There will be a costume contest at the April 14th bout. Do not disappoint.

 Anything else you want to know about? Drop a line or comment below.

As a skater, it’s hard to recap these double-headers. Luckily for me, Courtney from the Mercury and Oregon Sports News already did.  My expertise in this circumstance is more like…which Bettie left their uniform in the locker room after the game? (Megahurtz.) Who was hula hooping backstage? (Honey, duh.)  Who has the best red lipstick? (Avalanche.) Who swears the most on the track? (Depends on the game.) (Sorry, that was a total tease.)

GNR 164, Heartless Heathers 56

See, I told you that GNR had improved over the summer. And yes, Scald Eagle is pretty good, but Untamed Shrew was the lead scorer for the team and the game with 47. (How do I know this? Stats are now available online.)

Photo by Fun Frank

That sneaky Blast Unicorn got the high score for the Heartless Heathers with 17.

They're not saying "Boo" - they're saying "BU!" Photo by Sharkey

High Rollers 138, Break Neck Betties 126

Fans, you seemed to like this one.  Other than the part where my team lost, it was a really fun game to play as well. Fast, hard-hitting, strategic, with new and old faces. Loved it.

Joyride and Sully fight for position. Photo by Sharkey.

The Betties had a balanced scoring attack, led by Joyride with 40 points, and a 25-point jam to put us up early.  Napoleon scored 52 for the High Rollers, including a 30-point jam. Showoff!

(I kid, I kid.)

Napoleon goes for some more points. Photo by Sharkey,

Thank you to everyone who made it out. Remember that capacity is  lower for bouts at the Hangar, and buy your tickets early.

See you there soon?

There’s a lot to cover, so let’s talk about a few things to watch for in the Season 7 Opener at Memorial Coliseum on January 21st:

High Stakes!

These games are full-length and count toward season rankings. They’re no tune-up games, and teams have been training accordingly.

GNR! GNR!

Don’t count out those Guns ‘N’ Rollers  – they’ve had a summer of first-round picks and have been looking great in scrimmage.  They may have been fourth in 2011, but remember, the Betties were fourth in 2010.

Returning skaters!

They’re back: Sully Skullkicker and Napalm Beth for the High Rollers; Megahurtz  for the Betties. If you don’t remember Megahurtz from her time on the Betties or the Wheels of Justice, you’ll get to know her game fast.  

Cadillac is also returning, but came back too late to be eligible for the opener - she’ll play next time.

Local celebrities!

Scald Eagle was voted as Rookie of the Year in all of rollerderbydom by Derby News Network readers. Acid spent the summer learning new movies with her teammates on the first Team USA and traveled to Toronto for the World Cup.

Scald vs. Acid jam against each other last season. Photo by Sharkey.

Rosebuds!

Our first skaters who have aged out of the Rosebuds program have joined home teams: Braidy Punch for GNR and Toxic Haste for the Heathers. Can the rest of us keep up with these whippersnappers?

Fan fun!

The Memorial Coliseum is great for fans – easy to get to via public transit, with comfy seats and great views. Pick a fan section and get ready to cheer.

*

Tickets are available online and at the door.

If you can’t come, catch the live stream.

I’m excited! Are you excited? Who’s excited!?!

GNR: Frank-n-Hurter and Scouts Honor

Heartless Heathers: Toxic Haste, Moxie Roxem, Headache and Bella Constructor

Congratulations, skaters and teams!

Frank is a transfer from Bay Area. Bella Constrictor skated in Providence.

Please excuse any spelling errors.

Toxic Haste aged up from Rosebuds. She very well may face her predecessor, Braidy Punch, in the season opener.

Next up:

Did you know that the Rose City Rollers are a 501(c) nonprofit?  It’s true! And you can make any year-end contributions, if so inclined, via our brand-new Cafe Give donatation page.

Skate-a-Roke: Roller skating and karaoke. Not to be missed. January 9th.

Pistol jams!

On Saturday, the Lipstick Jungle (Break Neck Betties and Guns ‘N’ Rollers) showed the Southern Oregon Rollergirls how it’s done. Scoring points, that is.

Lipstick Jungle! Photo by Sharkey

Does anyone have a new favorite player or a rookie you’re keeping your eye on?

I think the new Betties look especially good, but I may be biased.

On Sunday, the Rosebuds won life by playing a benefit bout with proceeds going to Outdoor School Programs.

Thank you, Sharkey, for the above photos.

MEANWHILE, IN CANADA…

White Flight and Acid were playing with Team USA in the first-ever Roller Derby World Cup. They also won everything, by beating the rest of the world by hundreds of points at a time.

Photo by Axle Adams. Buy his book! http://nomercybook.com/

 What an incredible group! Congratulations, ladies! You do Rose City proud.

***

What’s next?

It’s pretty much time to buy your RCR Season Tickets, for yourself or as a gift.

Skate-a-Roke! Roller skating + Karaoke = Fun Squared.

The Season Seven Opener is quickly approaching. Both games will be a full hour and will count toward season rankings.

***

The following skaters have stepped down or retired since the last time we talked. Thank you ladies:

• Tits ‘n’ Assphault  (High Rollers)
• Rhea Derange (Wheels of Justice, former Break Neck Betties)
• Guts N Bolts (GNR)

You should also know that a new returning skater policy has been approved, allowing formerly-rostered skaters to return to home teams without spending time on Fresh Meat or waiting until a draft (it just uses a pick on the next draft, and they have to wait 30 days to bout). A couple of skaters have started the process, but no one is official yet, so I can’t post it here. 

You’re gonna like it, I swear!

Highlights in no particular order:

1. The announcers mentioning that Rose City loves beer, causing the chant of “Beer! Beer! Beer! Beer!” accompanied by fist-pumping by the skaters and fans in section 114.
2. Skaters riding the mechanical bull. Or better, falling off. As Rhea said, it never stops being funny.
3. Scald’s afterparty outfit.  Drink that in.
4. Black and white scrimmage at RMRG’s practice facility.
5. Line dancing. No, seriously. It’s really fun! Roller derby takes you to places you’d never expect. Like the Electric Cowboy.
6. Eventually, cheering on the Kansas City Roller Warriors. Especially Kelly Young and Eclipse.
7. Talking to WOJ fans from other leagues. Rose City is super popular. (Maybe because we’re pretty and fun?) Rocky Mountain fans really like us. We like you too, Rocky. Let’s be friends.
8. Finally getting to drink a damn beer after skating on Sunday. (Beer! Beer! Beer!)
9. The Wheels of Justice putting on an amazing game. Love you ladies!

WOJ are still in the running for first place in afterparty shenanigans. Sources indicate that Joyride has not been practicing doing The Worm as diligently as she might have, but that girl just might have the natural talent to pull this off.

Last Friday, the High Rollers scrimmaged with the Hellbound Homewreckers of the Dockyard Derby Dames.   On Saturday, the Axles of Annihilation played the Rainy City Roller Dolls (featuring guest skaters such as Untamed Shrew, Scrappy Go Lucky, and Smackya Sideways.)  Courtney from the Mercury recapped the AoA bout for you and Sharkey took some pictures.

Napoleon escapes the pack. (It's scary in there sometimes!) Photo by Sharkey.

That was fun!

You know what else is fun? Going to Denver for the WFTDA Championships. That’s just what the Wheels of Justice will be doing this weekend.

(AoA will also get the chance to play while in Denver in a rematch against Rocky Mountain’s B Team, the Contenders, and there will be scrimmaging after that, for those of you who are travelling.)

Derby News Network summed up the matchups and teams for you, but I’ll just lay out how this works for our favorite team:

• The Wheels of Justice will play Kansas City on Friday afternoon.
• If/when they win, they will play Windy City on Saturday afternoon.
• If/when they win, they will (probably) play Oly on Saturday evening.
• If/when they win, they will play for first place on Sunday afternoon.

The bracket has the schedule in Mountain time.

Not able to go? Rose City is hosting a kickass viewing party at Paddy’s on Friday.  Keep your eyes on the forum for updates about viewing parties as the weekend progresses.

via Hellslinger's boyfriend via the RCR forum

What – you couldn’t get in because a ton of tickets were sold at the door?  Huh. Same thing happened to me. I have my season ticket, of course, but I brought some friends who didn’t have tickets and it was sold out by the time we got there.  Luckily, Oaks Park’s mini golf course was open, so we still had fun.

Sorry; you didn’t come here to read about my weekend.  This is all a long way of telling you that I missed all the bouts.  But here’s a recap for you!  Thanks, Courtney. You’re the most professional RCR recap blogger I know.

The only inside information I have about the bouts is that there was at least one timeout and an injury during the co-ed action specifically due to the dudes sweating so much.  Boys, maybe it’s time to consider having people other than refs run out and mop up the sweat between jams, like at basketball games.  Also: ew.

 Sharkey was kind enough to take some pictures.  Thanks, Sharkey!

It was certainly a colorful night at the hangar.

What’s coming up next?

11/4: High Rollers vs. Hellbound Homewreckers (Dockyard Derby Dames).  $7 at the hangar, no advance sales

11/5: Axles of Annhilation vs. Rainy City Rollerdolls.  At the hangar.

11/11-11/13: WFTDA Championships in Denver. Look out for more information regarding fan viewing parties for those of you staying in Portland.  (And for those of you going to Denver: OMG, are you getting so excited right now?!?!)