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Thoughts & Insights #25 | What's Happening to our World?

Fri, 03 Jul 2009 17:44:56 +0000

It is time to stand up and recognize that we are fighting for freedom from our dependence upon expectation. Think about it ... what are the usual responses to this question? What's Happening to our World? It is time to stand up and recognize that we are fighting for freedom from our dependence upon expectation. Think about it ... what are the usual responses to this question? THEY are making a big mistake ... SOMEONE caused this problem ... WHO is responsible for this mess ... Why can't THEY come up with an answer? Our lives, around the world, are based upon expectation: Expectation of an outside force determining our experiences; expectation of the worst; expectation of the best; expectation of what's to come. We all know that this is wrong, it has just been easy. In this world of “do more, be more, make more” we have taken the easy way out of our responsibilities, and we’ve done it for a long time. It has simply become a bad habit; a disease of the intellectual. It is an addiction running rampant throughout humanity. Few, if any, have maintained complete immunity. We are all guilty in some way, shape, or form of partaking in this contagious habit. Thank god that we are an intelligent species. One who has admittedly not tapped our full potential. One who is starting a revolution toward seeing and initiating the utilization of that potential. We are beginning the passage toward our gift of intellectual responsibility to this world. It is a difficult road to navigate. What’s happening? We are waking up to the reality of what we have created along our path, and what we must do next to assure our success and comfort as we continue to forge ahead. Throughout history any revolution of change any fight for freedom has meant dealing with the reality of life getting worse before it can get better. This newest revolution is well underway. Our new beginning is drawing near, and freedom from the limitations of expectation, of THEY and SOMEONE, will soon come to be realized. Do you feel it? I do. I feel it in my blood. I have taken the reins and turned in a new direction. I am fighting for my freedom through awareness and ultimate responsibility for self. I trust that what is happening to my world is for the best and will be worth every struggle down the road. I no longer expect THEM to make my life better. I no longer expect SOMEONE to make a difference for me. I no longer expect answers without putting forth the effort to THINK IT OUT. I am striving toward open communication, and working together with others of the same mind, to win this revolution of change that is sweeping our world. Care to join me? I would love to share in the unbridled beauty of what’s to come with you in my life … Copyright © 2009 Rebecca Halstead All rights reserved www.ThinkItOut.net

Thoughts & Insights #24 | Life & Loss

Thu, 04 Jun 2009 16:15:27 +0000

A very dear friend of mine experienced the loss of a feline loved one and, as I was writing to console her, my own words made an impact of awareness and understanding in me. It never ceases to amaze me; how we learn our life lessons, and then live them without really stopping to understand how the experience and the awareness have changed our lives... until we share it with someone else... Life and Loss A very dear friend of mine experienced the loss of a feline loved one and, as I was writing to console her, my own words made an impact of awareness and understanding in me. It never ceases to amaze me; how we learn our life lessons, and then live them without really stopping to understand how the experience and the awareness have changed our lives... until we share it with someone else... "Words are awfully difficult to find at these times. Hugs work much better in my opinion. I went through very similar feelings (regarding your comment about not being able to be quiet anymore) when I was young. I was devastated by the loss of four young cats in just a few months. They were part of a litter that I had rescued and raised. My mind went a little crazy with my grief. I couldn't get away from it for a long time. But when I did start to emerge, I was different. I used to think people were cold hearted if they didn't cry or mourn. But now, I understand that not everyone is cold hearted if they don't show extended grief upon loss through death. It is simply belief and understanding, and acceptance and trust. We each have to find our own way to survive in the midst of life and loss. I still miss my animals when they leave me, but I don't hurt so much or for so long anymore. They visit me often in my heart, my mind, and sometimes my vision. My grandparents are the closest humans I've lost in my adulthood. I think the world was preparing me for their losses as I was growing up. Having a family of my own with two little baby boys ... if I had reacted as I did in my youth, I would have caused them much fear, anxiety, and probably scarred them for life! Instead, I managed when my grandparents left. I didn't fall apart like I used to. I get overwhelmed with love and emotion for my grandparents once or twice a year now, but rather than focusing on the loss, like I used to, I focus on the good memories. I hear my grandma say my name the way that no one else ever has. I hear my grandpa curse at bad luck, and I feel him hold my hand. I think the world is encouraging you and helping you to accept what you know is true. Your world will open up, and what you truly want in this life will start to become reality as soon as you let go of what is holding you back. You don't have to feel guilty for others' transitions. Death is a human word, a belief, not a reality. The pain is not in someone's death, it is in our loss. Though each spirit sheds their physical body, we do not die. We live on. Until we accept that, and let go of our fears of loss, the pain and guilt will continue to threaten the joy of our material / physical world. I trust that my loved ones are happy. They would want me and their family to be happy, too, despite the loss of physical touch. Trust that you are right where you are supposed to be. Don't let the bad erase the good, let it balance it. You will discover a neutral space. It's there that you will begin to really learn and grow spiritually. That's when the ability to find peace starts to settle into your soul." Copyright © 2009 Rebecca Halstead All rights reservedwww.ThinkItOut.net

Thoughts & Insights #23 | Life's Bittersweet Success

Thu, 04 Jun 2009 03:24:44 +0000

I admit, inspiration is hard to come by lately. And I am an advocate of positive thought and the power of intention, by the way. Life's Bittersweet Success I admit, inspiration is hard to come by lately. And I am an advocate of positive thought and the power of intention, by the way.You’ve heard the adage “practice what you preach?” Well, it is but one of many conundrums that stuck solidly in my awareness at an early age. With it, I perceived something of importance behind the message, and adopted it as a method of good measure to value and guide me. Throughout my life, it’s been a driving force behind my accomplishments and goals and my ultimate decision to live by example. I firmly believe that to preach without practice makes one a hypocrite and, consequently, equates to dooming yourself and others to almost certain failure. Conversely, to both practice and preach is an odds-on chance for all to succeed. I’ve held this belief foremost in my thoughts and actions in adulthood, specifically so that my sons might gain an advantage in this game called life. Being a hypocrite, to me, is something to acknowledge and avoid. I consciously hoped that seeing the actual practice of one’s beliefs and opinions (preaching) would make the difference for them; that they might navigate some of life’s emotional hardships, physical challenges, and material obstacles better than previous generations. Despite these intentions, a couple of weeks ago, I thought I had failed.My youngest son was diagnosed with Type I Diabetes. Though not the end of the world, it was still a lot to swallow and digest. Not to be dismissed, my oldest son had to cope with the immediate effect on his own reality. My first thoughts were in the realm of, “So, now we face the hardship, challenges, and obstacles of this new twist in our path. Then we move on.”Three weeks later, in reflection, I realize the power of my intentions has already corrected my first mistake on this new path for me. There is a different lesson in this twist for each of us. None is easier or harder than any other. Living with Diabetes, for now, is the life lesson my youngest son must face. Coping with secondary influences and supporting others’ needs - while setting aside his own desires - is the life lesson my oldest son must face. And it is my life lesson, at this time, to support and encourage both of them and myself with equal encouragement and understanding. I cannot live their lessons for them as my traditional human nature wants to do. I must listen to them, hear their needs, and respond. I will do neither of them any good if I guess, try, and answer their lessons for them. I must resolve to live my part to the very best of my ability, and they must reach deep within themselves and do the same. Together, if we manage our distinct and separate responsibilities, if we share our resources and trust one another and this process, we will learn our lessons well and overcome our parallel hardships, challenges, and obstacles. Then we will each taste our successes in navigating this twist. Then our healing will be achieved and we will move on to the next stages of our lives.I know in my heart I have not failed my sons. I know in my heart I never will fail my sons. I cannot fail them so long as I live my life by example. Through the power of intention, they both have developed the courage to face their fears, the strength to push on through disillusionment, and the power to believe in themselves with pure, positive intention. I see it in their ability to take this latest twist in stride, and to not allow dis-ease and dis-order to stop them from taking action. I hear it in their acknowledgement of their individual and familial situations, and in allowing themselves the right to be angry. I feel it in their ability to see past that anger and to laugh, smile, forgive, and play despite life’s unending contest of balance … How can I possibly doubt the truth when my son looks me in the eye and says, “If this is what we have to do … then we do it.”So I can see, thus far, that I have succeeded in living by example. My sons are both living their greatest life. They are accepting of life’s challenges; living their lives to the fullest and the best of their ability and understanding. They are living by the standards of their own ideals. They, too, are living by example.At nine and eleven, their understanding is far and away beyond my comprehension when I was at that young age. So I see the proof - in my methods and in my intentions - that I have not failed. I have imparted upon my sons a sense of awareness and understanding, the gifts of allowing and persevering, and the belief and knowing that everything has its purpose and reasoning in this life.Life is not perfect, life is just life. It’s up to each of us to choose to live our greatest life. Copyright © 2009 Rebecca Halstead All rights reserved www.ThinkItOut.net

Thoughts & Insights #22 | Attaining Enlightenment

Mon, 01 Jun 2009 15:38:45 +0000

It takes noticing the little things. It also takes: Gratitude. How often do you say thank you each day to other people? The bank teller, the waiter, the grocery store clerk, the mocha stand girl … How often do you say “you are welcome?” Not “thank you,” but “you are welcome?” Attaining Enlightenment (for normal people) It takes noticing the little things. It also takes: Gratitude.How often do you say thank you each day to other people? The bank teller, the waiter, the grocery store clerk, the mocha stand girl …How often do you say “you are welcome?” Not “thank you,” but “you are welcome?”I’m willing to bet, if you’re normal or typical, you say thank you twice as often (at least) as you say you’re welcome. Most everybody says thank you without thinking twice. Think about it. You send your deposit through the drive-through vacuum, the teller completes the transaction. She sends it back and says, “thank you” over the microphone, and you respond, “thank you” as you retrieve your slip of paper and drive off down the road.It’s a nicety, but it’s overused, underappreciated, and feels superficial most of the time. Not all of the time, but a lot of the time. If you say it slowly, it makes a big difference but it’s still overused and underappreciated. Now think about the acknowledgment of “you’re welcome.” It implies a sense of gratitude, takes a bigger space of time to enunciate, and recognize the full circle of give and take not just one half. Both sides of the transaction around, “you’re welcome” get time to think about fulfillment and receive benefit from the feeling of mutual recognition.If you pay attention to human interaction involving displays of gratitude you’ll notice there are more smiles surrounding a complete transaction of “thank you” and “you’re welcome”. Partaking in complete transactions, you will notice a prolonged sense of good feelings; that is, the positive energy flows over and has a greater tendency to influence more of your day. It’s the simple things like this in life that provide enlightenment in a sometimes dark and unnavigable world. Reading, saying, and experiencing simple everyday things of this nature can change your life and the lives of the people around you.Do you say “thank you” and “you’re welcome” and “I love you” with true intention, meaning, and acknowledgment to the people you care most about as often as you say them to the bank teller?(Well, okay not “I love you,” maybe).It takes a lot of energy to live within each others’ space. Even within our own space. Showing yourself and the people around you respect and gratitude for what you receive from them is a simple pleasure in life when done with the true feeling and time to absorb the acknowledgment of “you are welcome.”A perfect example of this is when I receive phone calls from telemarketers. I realize they wouldn’t have the job and be calling if the mass majority didn’t buy into whatever it is they’re selling. When I hear, “Hello, Mrs. Halstead, how are you today?” I specifically take the time to respond, “I’m terrific, thank you for asking. And how are you?”This usually interrupts their sales pitch and makes them stop and think about being a living person not an autobot.Too often I get the answer similar to, “Oh. Why I’m just fine. Thank you. That’s so nice of you to ask.”To which I always say, “You are welcome.”More often than not, the call then shifts from the hurried, rude, and non-feeling world of human brainwash to the world of feeling and caring and gratitude for recognition. When I say, “No, I’m not interested, but thank you for asking,” I don’t get the pushy, “But wait!” I get, “Okay, well, thank you for your time, and have a nice day.”“You’re welcome, and thank you, [so and so]. You have a nice day, too.”“Well, I will. Thank you.”“You are welcome.”Copyright © 2009 Rebecca HalsteadAll rights reservedwww.ThinkItOut.net

Thoughts & Insights #21 | Simple Pleasures Require Simple Answers

Fri, 01 May 2009 22:17:33 +0000

Has anyone else ever noticed that life is just full of simple pleasures if we take the time to look? Pleasures that make you melt with happiness and tranquility they feel so good, both during and afterward? Ones that make you say, "Wow, I want to do that again sometime!" I’m talking about simple things that don’t involve emotional dynamics, or financial dynamics, or any of the such. I’m talking about just sitting or hiking in nature; feeling warm sunshine on your face; sharing hot chocolate by the fire on a cold wintry day; shooting hoops with friends afterschool; roasting s’mores over the burn pile after a good day’s cleanup efforts ... Thoughts & Insights Issue #21 May 1, 2009 - www.ThinkItOut.net Simple Pleasures Require Simple Answers Has anyone else ever noticed that life is just full of simple pleasures if we take the time to look? Pleasures that make you melt with happiness and tranquility they feel so good, both during and afterward? Ones that make you say, "Wow, I want to do that again sometime!" I'm talking about simple things that don't involve emotional dynamics, or financial dynamics, or any of the such. I'm talking about just sitting or hiking in nature; feeling warm sunshine on your face; sharing hot chocolate by the fire on a cold wintry day; shooting hoops with friends afterschool; roasting s'mores over the burn pile after a good day's cleanup efforts ... I’m talking about wonderful, simple feelings: Feelings of beauty, peace, companionship, achievement; feelings of living life consciously. Why can’t more moments feel like these? Or can they? Can driving to work in rush hour traffic be a time to enjoy the solace of quiet, the peace of nothing but time with patience and understanding, or a time to absorb the musical genius of a symphony? Can the weather be our guide to let go of the “should” and just be what we need to be, right now? Can we just be depressed in a thick fog; alive and invigorated in the chill spring sun; contemplative or melancholy in an evening rain? Can we simply listen to ourselves and just be what we are truly feeling? Simply, with acceptance and maybe even pleasure? I wonder: Why does everything have to be so controlled and scheduled? Things like planned vacations, team sports and competitions, work schedules both professional and personal ... Granted those are useful and fun, but are we forgetting the simpler pleasures? Why can’t kids simply organize their own game with friends once a week or everyday afterschool anymore? It would teach them valuable skills rather than having it all done for them. Simple skills that create simple pleasure in life. Why not utilize the best of both ways? All of it can be truly, authentically, simple and pleasurable. We have the power to let go of the expectations, the stereotypes, the pressures. We have the power of perception. We have the power of choice. Maybe it is distraction causing some of our loss of pleasure. Distractions take you off of your path and away from your goal or purpose. There are positive distractions and negative distractions. Positive distractions help us grow and evolve, and lead us to simple answers and happiness. When you are on your path of purpose and light, positive distractions help you let go of issues such as control, over focus, and tension. They give you freedom, creativity, and new energy. Negative distractions take us through wrong answers such as frustration, suffering, and illness. Negative distractions make you frown, they feel intrusive, and they often make you lose focus and desire. They make you feel literally drained of energy. When you are struggling to find or stay on your path of purpose and light, positive distractions are often perceived as frivolous, unnecessary, and time consuming. We deny them even though it is through them that we will find our simple answers. Negative distractions are blinding and seemingly unavoidable, and are perceived two ways: as a way to a means, and the price that must be paid; or the way to instant gratification that never works, but just keeps getting our attention, our energy, and our devotion. If you really stop to think about it, it’s the simple pleasures in life that are the most fulfilling. Finding your way to simple pleasures is exceedingly simple if you learn to declutter your preconceived perceptions and expectations, and listen to your own navigation system. Turning off the human brainwash is the difficult part. How do you do it? Simply take small steps. Make just a few changes in your lifestyle at a time. Here are some suggestions to start: 1. Turn off the news media 2. Turn off your phone (once in awhile) 3. Turn off your inner voice (this takes practice, but is the most worthwhile) 4. Take the time to go walk in the park or the trails, not down the street (be sure to look around) 5. Take time to be grateful and give (visit the animal shelter, children’s hospital, or local mission even just once a year) 6. Dedicate time in silence just for you (at least 15 to 30 minutes everyday journaling, lying still resting, or just looking out the window without thinking). If you start and stick to one or more of these simple tasks, I assure you, you will start to feel the simple pleasure of life more and more often with less and less effort. Copyright © 2009 Rebecca Halstead All rights reserved

Thoughts & Insights #20 | Battling Self Doubt

Thu, 09 Apr 2009 05:35:18 +0000

Well, speaking from my own experience, at the center of my self doubts I always find ego and fear. Thoughts & Insights Issue #20 April 8, 2009 - www.ThinkItOut.net Battling Self Doubt Well, speaking from my own experience, at the center of my self doubts I always find ego and fear. My fear comes from my ego being the "expert" who says "do it like this..." then says, "I don't have to do it or prove it, it's been done before." To me, ego equates to excuses, yes, and action, no. I've found that once I tell my ego where to go (consistently), my fears of failure pretty much disappear, and my excuses not to do, be, try, or overcome go away with it. Getting rid of the automatic ego reaction did, however, take some self discipline, time, and patience. It is a sneaky creature, and can morph into so many different presentations ... always when you are at your most vulnerable and susceptible point. The trick is to trust your Self, not your doubt infested ego, and always believe you are doing your best in every given moment. Sometimes your best is really really great. Sometimes your best isn't so great, but it's still your best at that moment, and that's all you should ask for. I found more answers lay in three specific areas: 1. acceptance 2. letting go of expectation 3. communication If you can accept that you're in a not so great place, then you are one step on your way to changing it. Acceptance, that whatever it is you are doubting about yourself is just a temporary snippet of time (that will pass), is a method for reducing your fear through simplicity. Too much dwelling and too many details make us believe that failure is imminent. If you think about that, it's rather ridiculous to worry because we're all going to fail at something occassionally. That's a part of balance: win some, lose some. Stop your ego from chattering, tell it to just be quiet. All in all people do tend to think and talk too much. Letting go of expectations removes clouds of feelings, like stress and urgency, from most situations, not to mention nixing the tendency to project outcomes. Pick the outcome you want and stick with it without comparisons to outside influences. If you must compare, only compare your Self to your Self. Focus on all those brilliant and validating accomplishments you spoke of. They are your accomplishments, and they are brilliant. You are unique, so you do not compare to any other individual on the planet. Only you can do what you set out to do. Knowing that gives me confidence. Perhaps it will help you, too. Another aspect I work on is communication with my Self. Contrary to popular old beliefs and smart-alec comments, talking to your Self is not a weakness, nor is it a sign of being loopy. It is a sign of congruent awareness which, when utilized, develops into an empowering habit of automatic, justifiable self confidence. Of course, if you're like me and everyone else, other aspects of doubt tend to surface and try to defeat you from time to time, but I've found that addressing these three areas upfront paves the way to nipping self doubt in the bud straightaway. At the very least, it will give you the push to get somone you trust involved to shove you a bit harder in the right direction if you cannot do it yourself. My biggest lesson in this arena? You've probably already figured it out: Ask for help. Why struggle in the dark when you can use someone else's experience to get ahead of the game faster and in less agony? Sharing was one of the best ideas that ever came about ... Copyright © 2009 Rebecca Halstead All rights reserved www.ThinkItOut.net

Thoughts & Insights #19 | Provoking Awareness

Sun, 01 Mar 2009 16:38:46 +0000

When was the last time you sat down and asked yourself some really deep questions, without answering right away? Thoughts & Insights Issue #19 March 1, 2009 - www.ThinkItOut.net Provoking Awareness When was the last time you sat down and asked yourself some really deep questions, without answering right away? One surefire way to make the most out of your life is to let your mind open. Not open your mind. There is a difference. No, let your mind open. How do you let your mind open? You get your intuitive awareness flowing by asking yourself questions, and allowing yourself time to soak in those questions before you answer them. Often people jump to the reaction phase, skip the soak phase, and pummel the world with an all knowing knee jerk response. Which is not the product of an open mind .... Here's a situational example: When faced with the opportunity to help someone you know, do you help thinking that you will receive something in return? Or do you help simply because help is needed? Now, soak in the question. Honestly consider it, in its entirety, with time and a life of experience under your belt. (If you already answered, don't worry about it, just keep it in mind and continue reading.) If you helped the person simply to help and not to receive anything: How would you feel a year later if that person never, since, offered to help you in return even knowing that you are struggling with, say, health problems? If you still think you can honestly say you wouldn't expect to receive anything in return for your help: Would you help that same person again if they asked you to help them again? and again? and again? Do you give to get what you need? Or do you give to give what is needed? Very simple on the surface and upfront but, deep down where it truly counts and cannot be passed off, you might see conscience and feel pressure. Right from wrong. Is it fundamentally right to give without expecting to receive? Is it fundamentally wrong to receive without expecting to give? It is how the world should work, but it is also how the world cannot work. At least for humans, that is. Animals in a herd or pack give what they are capable of giving to support the herd or pack. The strong supply food and protection to those who are weak. The weak offer knowledge and guidance to those who are young. Natural selection takes care of the details. Try this thought on: People should give without expecting to receive, for no one should have to expect what is fundamentally right. If you give you should receive. If everyone gave what they have to offer freely they would not need to expect to receive, because they would be being given to freely. Did you just get bogged down with exceptions? Me too. Try this instead: At the end of the day, ask your Self questions about every experience you encountered that sticks out in your mind. Why did that meeting end on a bad note? What was it about the argument in the coffee shop that bothered me so? Why do I always feel anxiety going home at night? Ask questions after you see others interacting. Ask questions of opinions you form from your perceptions. Ask questions about recurring patterns in your life. You will find at the root of all of us, as a society, we give to get what we need as well as to give what is needed. It's how nature works. Paradox? Maybe, maybe not. Fact? Maybe, maybe not. The point? To make us question ourselves instead of others. If you discover paradox within your Self,... then you may let your mind open to questions regarding your Self,... then you may begin to focus on your Self,... then you might make a difference for your Self. So, if we all question ourselves, instead of others ... would the world be given what it needs? Copyright © 2009 Rebecca Halstead All rights reserved www.ThinkItOut.net

Do You Have the Will to Lead?

Wed, 04 Feb 2009 18:36:57 +0000

Who hasn't stared out an airplane window on yet another red-eye and thought, What exactly is the point of this exercise? Or sat through a particularly senseless meeting and wondered, How in the world did I get here? Or wrestled with a set of strategic choices -- all of which seem hard and unpleasant -- and said, What happened to the fun part of being in business? According to Peter Koestenbaum, those uncomfortable questions -- those existential quandaries -- are at the root of issues that great leaders deal with all the time, and they influence every decision that must be made. Article location:http://www.fastcompany.com/magazine/32/koestenbaum.htmlDecember 19, 2007Tags: Leadership, Careers, Work/Life, personal growth0 Readers Recommended this Article Do You Have the Will to Lead? By Polly LaBarre Who hasn't stared out an airplane window on yet another red-eye and thought, What exactly is the point of this exercise? Or sat through a particularly senseless meeting and wondered, How in the world did I get here? Or wrestled with a set of strategic choices -- all of which seem hard and unpleasant -- and said, What happened to the fun part of being in business? According to Peter Koestenbaum, those uncomfortable questions -- those existential quandaries -- are at the root of issues that great leaders deal with all the time, and they influence every decision that must be made. A classically trained philosopher with degrees in philosophy, physics, and theology from Stanford, Harvard, and Boston University, Koestenbaum has spent half a century pondering the questions that give most of us headaches: Why is there being instead of nothing? What is the ultimate explanation of the universe? What does it mean to be a successful human being? After fleeing pre-World War II Germany with his parents, Koestenbaum was raised in Venezuela; later, he emigrated to the United States to pursue his studies. He taught at San Jose State University for 34 years, and during that period he focused on creating a "practical philosophy" -- a philosophy that is linked to education, psychology, and psychiatry. His many books include "The Vitality of Death" (Greenwood, 1971), "The New Image of the Person" (Greenwood, 1978), and "Managing Anxiety" (Prentice Hall, 1974). One of his books, "Leadership: The Inner Side of Greatness" (Jossey-Bass, 1991), has been translated into several languages, and Koestenbaum is now at work on a new book, tentatively titled "Diamond Reverse Engineering." More than 25 years ago, Koestenbaum traded the cloistered halls of academia for the front lines of the global economy. It's not unheard-of for this philosopher, now a tireless 71-year-old with thick glasses and a flowing beard, to visit clients across three continents in a single week. His agenda: to apply the power of philosophy to the big question of the day -- how to reconcile the often-brutal realities of business with basic human values -- and to create a new language of effective leadership. "Unless the distant goals of meaning, greatness, and destiny are addressed," Koestenbaum insists, "we can't make an intelligent decision about what to do tomorrow morning -- much less set strategy for a company or for a human life. Nothing is more practical than for people to deepen themselves. The more you understand the human condition, the more effective you are as a businessperson. Human depth makes business sense." Koestenbaum's wisdom makes sense to leaders at such giant organizations as Ford, EDS, Citibank, Xerox, Ericsson, and even one of Korea's chaebols. All of these companies have welcomed him into their offices to roam free as a resident sage, company therapist, and secular priest. His involvement with them ranges from one-on-one coaching sessions to decade-long engagements featuring intensive leadership seminars. At Ford, Koestenbaum contributed to the company's 2,000-person Senior Executive Program throughout the 1980s. In more than a decade at EDS, he led seminars and coached hundreds of top executives, including then-chairman Les Alberthal. He also coached Alexander Krauer, a prominent Swedish industrialist, when Krauer was chairman of Ciba-Geigy. Picking up on that momentum, another leading Swedish industrialist, Rolf Falkenberg, founded the Koestenbaum Institute to disseminate the philosopher's teachings across Scandinavia. "Everything I do," says Koestenbaum, "is about using themes from the history of thought to rescue people who are stuck." His logic: Change -- true, lasting, deep-seated change -- is the business world's biggest and most persistent challenge. But too many people and too many companies approach change by treating it as a technical challenge rather than by developing authentic answers to basic questions about business life. "We've reached such explosive levels of freedom that, for the first time in history, we have to manage our own mutation," declares Koestenbaum. "It's up to us to decide what it means to be a successful human being. That's the philosophical task of the age. Nothing happens unless you make it happen. As a leader, everything is your responsibility, because you always could have chosen otherwise." In an interview with Fast Company, Koestenbaum explains how age-old questions apply to the new world of work. Why does being a leader feel so hard today? Because reckoning with freedom is always hard -- and the powerful paradoxes of the new economy make it even harder. We're living in a peculiar time: It's marked by a soaring stock market, the creation of tremendous wealth, an explosion in innovation, and the acute alienation that occurs when the global economy hits the average individual. What I call the "new-economy pathology" is driven by impossible demands -- better quality, lower prices, faster innovation -- that generate an unprecedented form of stress. People feel pressure to meet ever-higher objectives in all realms of work, wealth, and lifestyle -- and to thrive on that pressure in the process. This condition is exacerbated by the pornographic treatment of business in media and culture. The message is, You're living in the best country in the world at the best time in history; you have an amazing degree of freedom to do what you want, along with an unprecedented opportunity to build immense wealth and success -- and to do it more quickly than ever before. Of course, the average individual has as much of a chance of launching a skyrocketing IPO as he or she has of becoming a movie star. What's even more disturbing is that the ascendancy of shareholder value as the dominant driving force in business has resulted in a terrible insensitivity to basic human values. That's the real "stuck point" for leaders: How do we cope with a brutal business reality and still preserve human values? How do we handle competition without becoming either the kind of fool who allows it to crush us or the kind of fool who forgets people? Resolving that paradox requires something like an evolutionary transformation of who we are, how we behave, how we think, and what we value. We've reached such an incredible level of freedom that, for the first time in history, we have to manage our own mutation. It's up to us to decide what it means to be a successful human being. That's the philosophical task of the age. In some sense, of course, that has been the task of every age. There's nothing in today's economic disruptions that equals the horror of World War II. According to some estimates, nearly 100,000 people were killed during every week of that war. In 1935, when I was a seven-year-old boy, I once stood in the Alexanderplatz, a square in Berlin, and watched Hitler parade by in his Mercedes, just a few feet away. I'll never forget the mothers with babies in their arms, the children holding up swastikas. That leaves a mark on you that can't be erased -- and it leaves you with questions that you have to confront: Who am I to have witnessed such acts? How am I to live meaningfully in a world such as this? The new economy just happens to be the form that our existential challenge takes today. As always, the real obstacle is existence itself. That's a heavy burden to place on leaders. They must not only guide organizations but also wrestle with basic philosophical questions. There's a terrible defect at the core of how we think about people and organizations today. There is little or no tolerance for the kinds of character-building conversations that pave the way for meaningful change. The average person is stuck, lost, riveted by the objective domain. That's where our metrics are; that's where we look for solutions. It's the come-on of the consulting industry and the domain of all the books, magazines, and training programs out there. And that's why books and magazines that have numbers in their titles sell so well. We'll do anything to avoid facing the basic, underlying questions: How do we make truly difficult choices? How do we act when the risks seem overwhelming? How can we muster the guts to burn our bridges and to create a condition of no return? There's nothing wrong with all of those technical solutions. They're excellent; they're creative; they're even necessary. But they shield us from the real issues: What kind of life do I want to lead? What is my destiny? How much evil am I willing to tolerate? Reflection doesn't take anything away from decisiveness, from being a person of action. In fact, it generates the inner toughness that you need to be an effective person of action -- to be a leader. Think of leadership as the sum of two vectors: competence (your specialty, your skills, your know-how) and authenticity (your identity, your character, your attitude). When companies and people get stuck, they tend to apply more steam -- more competence -- to what got them into trouble in the first place: "If I try harder, I'll be successful," or "If we exert more control, we'll get the results we need." The problem is, when you're stuck, you're not likely to make progress by using competence as your tool. Instead, progress requires commitment to two things. First, you need to dedicate yourself to understanding yourself better -- in the philosophical sense of understanding what it means to exist as a human being in the world. Second, you need to change your habits of thought: how you think, what you value, how you work, how you connect with people, how you learn, what you expect from life, and how you manage frustration. Changing those habits means changing your way of being intelligent. It means moving from a nonleadership mind to a leadership mind. What are the attributes of a "leadership mind"? Authentic leaders have absorbed the fundamental fact of existence -- that you can't get around life's inherent contradictions. The leadership mind is spacious. It has ample room for the ambiguities of the world, for conflicting feelings, and for contradictory ideas. I believe that the central leadership attribute is the ability to manage polarity. In every aspect of life, polarities are inevitable: We want to live, yet we must die. How can I devote myself fully to both family and career? Am I a boss or a friend? A lover or a judge? How do I reconcile my own needs with those of my team? Those paradoxes are simply part of life. Every business interaction is a form of confrontation -- a clash of priorities, a struggle of dignities, a battle of beliefs. That's not an invitation to wage an epic battle of good versus evil or right versus wrong. (Chances are, your boss is less of an SOB than he is an agent of the cosmos.) My point is, you have to be careful not to bang your head against the wrong door. Polarities are in the nature of things. How we act, how we respond to those polarities -- that is where we separate greatness from mediocrity. That doesn't mean that we don't have to make decisions. Tough choices are a daily requirement of leadership. Leaders have to hire and fire, to sign off on new strategies, and to risk investments -- all of which can lead to stress and guilt. The presence of guilt is not a result of making the wrong choice but of choosing itself. And that is the human condition: You are a being that chooses. A young, ambitious guy whom I worked with at Amoco got a double promotion that required a transfer to Cairo. He went home to his new wife and young baby and said, "Great news, we're moving to Cairo." Appalled, his wife said, "You're moving alone. I'm going home to my mother." That was the first test of leadership in that family. There was no viable compromise: If he relinquished his promotion, he would resent his wife for ruining his career; if she just went along with the move, she would hate him for squashing her ideals for her baby and herself. What to do? After some discussion, they might have been tempted to believe that maturity required them to deny their feelings and to sacrifice on behalf of each other. But that actually leads to illness, depression, and the end of affection. Instead, they went back to the fundamentals: Is it my career, or is it our career? Is it your baby, or is it our baby? Are we individuals, or do we operate as a team? What are our values? That marriage had to grow up by the equivalent of five years in about two weeks. They ended up going to Cairo, but their relationship had been transformed: She understood that his career was important to her; he recommitted to his values as a participant in the family. What matters is not what they ended up choosing, but how. They took the courageous step to redefine, from the inside out, who they truly were. The how is what gives you character. The what, which at first appears paramount, is ultimately of no emotional significance. Managing polarity teaches us that there are no solutions -- there are only changes of attitude. When you grapple with polarities in your life, you lose your arrogant, self-indulgent illusions, and you realize that the joke is on you. To get that message makes you a more credible human being -- instantly. It's one thing for a leader to embrace the contradictions of the new economy. But how does he or she persuade colleagues to go along with this kind of thinking? The best leaders operate in four dimensions: vision, reality, ethics, and courage. These are the four intelligences, the four forms of perceiving, the languages for communicating that are required to achieve meaningful, sustained results. The visionary leader thinks big, thinks new, thinks ahead -- and, most important, is in touch with the deep structure of human consciousness and creative potential. Reality is the polar opposite of vision. The leader as realist follows this motto: Face reality as it is, not as you wish it to be. The realist grapples with hard, factual, daily, and numeric parameters. A master in the art of the possible, the realist has no illusions, sees limits, and has no patience for speculation. Ethics refers to the basic human values of integrity, love, and meaning. This dimension represents a higher level of development, one ruled not by fear or pleasure but by principle. Courage is the realm of the will; it involves the capacity to make things happen. The philosophic roots of this dimension lie in fully understanding the centrality of free will in human affairs. Courage involves both advocacy -- the ability to take a stand -- and the internalization of personal responsibility and accountability. The real challenge of leadership is to develop all four of these often-contradictory modes of thinking and behaving at once. Leaders tend to operate on two dimensions at most -- which has more to do with a lack of insight into human nature than with corrupt intent. Reality dominates, and the second-most-common attribute is ethics: Consider the statement "People are our most important asset." Unfortunately, those are often empty words -- not just because too few people make the connection between profits and human values, but also because there is no adequate understanding of what it means to be a human being in a brutally competitive environment. "Vision" might be one of the most overused words in business, but in fact vision -- in the sense of honing great thinking and fostering the capacity for ongoing inventiveness -- is rarely practiced. And courage is demonstrated even more rarely. When we talk about courage, we usually mean having guts or taking risks. But you talk about courage as if it were an almost mythic quality -- one that lies at the heart of leadership success. It goes back to the beginning of our discussion. Aristotle believed, correctly, that courage is the first of the human virtues, because it makes the others possible. Courage begins with the decision to face the ultimate truth about existence: the dirty little secret that we are free. It requires an understanding of free will at the archetypal level -- an understanding that we are free to define who we are at every moment. We are not what society and randomness have made us; we are what we have chosen to be from the depth of our being. We are a product of our will. We are self-made in the deepest sense. One of the gravest problems in life is self-limitation: We create defense mechanisms to protect us from the anxiety that comes with freedom. We refuse to fulfill our potential. We live only marginally. This was Freud's definition of psychoneurosis: We limit how we live so that we can limit the amount of anxiety that we experience. We end up tranquilizing many of life's functions. We shut down the centers of entrepreneurial and creative thinking; in effect, we halt progress and growth. But no significant decision -- personal or organizational -- has ever been undertaken without being attended by an existential crisis, or without a commitment to wade through anxiety, uncertainty, and guilt. That's what we mean by transformation. You can't just change how you think or the way that you act -- you must change the way that you will. You must gain control over the patterns that govern your mind: your worldview, your beliefs about what you deserve and about what's possible. That's the zone of fundamental change, strength, and energy -- and the true meaning of courage. Does developing the will to transform mean that you can actually will others to change? Taking personal responsibility for getting others to implement strategy is the leader's key polarity. It's the existential paradox of holding yourself 100% responsible for the fate of your organization, on the one hand, and assuming absolutely no responsibility for the choices made by other people, on the other hand. That applies to your children too. You are 100% responsible for how your children turn out. And you accomplish that by teaching them that they are 100% responsible for how they turn out. So how do you motivate people? Not with techniques, but by risking yourself with a personal, lifelong commitment to greatness -- by demonstrating courage. You don't teach it so much as challenge it into existence. You cannot choose for others. All you can do is inform them that you cannot choose for them. In most cases, that in itself will be a strong motivator for the people whom you want to cultivate. The leader's role is less to heal or to help than to enlarge the capacity for responsible freedom. Some people are more talented than others. Some are more educationally privileged than others. But we all have the capacity to be great. Greatness comes with recognizing that your potential is limited only by how you choose, how you use your freedom, how resolute you are, how persistent you are -- in short, by your attitude. And we are all free to choose our attitude. Polly LaBarre, a Fast Company senior editor, is based in New York City. Contact Peter Koestenbaum by email (pkipeter@ix.netcom.com [1]) or on the Web (www.pib.net [2]). Sidebar: Fear and Trembling in the New Economy You don't need a philosopher to tell you that anxiety is one by-product of what Peter Koestenbaum calls "the brutality and promise" of the new economy. But you do need a philosopher to explain how anxiety rules the human condition -- and how it can serve as a powerful, productive force in your life. The best thinker for the job, says Koestenbaum, is Soren Kierkegaard, a Danish philosopher who did as much for the analysis of anxiety as Freud did for the analysis of the subconscious. Here's a short course from Koestenbaum on the value of anxiety. Anxiety generates knowledge. "As Kierkegaard explains it, anxiety is the natural condition. It's a cognitive emotion that reveals truths that we would prefer to hide but that we need for our greater health. In an essay called 'The Concept of Dread,' Kierkegaard draws a connection between anxiety and free will. We cannot prove that free will is true -- because we freely choose the meaning of truth in the first place. But our anxiety tips us off to the existence of our freedom: It reminds us of our huge responsibility to choose who we are and to define our world." Anxiety leads to action. "Kierkegaard wrote that the most common form of despair occurs when one does not choose or 'will' to be oneself -- when a person is 'another than himself.' The opposite of despair is 'to will to be that self which one truly is.' That's the experience of anxiety. It is choosing life in the face of death; it is the experience of thought becoming action, reflection becoming behavior, and theory becoming practice. Anxiety is pure energy." Anxiety makes you a grown-up. "Anxiety is the experience of growth itself. In any endeavor, how do you feel when you go from one stage to the next? The answer: You feel anxious. Anxiety that is denied makes us ill; anxiety that is fully confronted and fully lived through converts itself into joy, security, strength, centeredness, and character. The practical formula: Go where the pain is."

Thoughts & Insights #18 | Perspective Part 5 | Expectation & the Path to your Zen

Sun, 01 Feb 2009 20:20:44 +0000

How can a person brimming with self confidence be found speechless and uncomfortable? Expectation. Thoughts & Insights Issue #18 February 1, 2009 - www.ThinkItOut.net Perspective Part 5 | Expectation & the Path to your Zen How can a successful person brimming with self confidence be found speechless and uncomfortable? Expectation. The trap of human expectation can get the best of us at any time, place, or situation. When you perceive something or someone around you (that affects you) has changed, what do you do? Do you react to that change? Do you ask the person or situation if they feel a change? Or do you look inside yourself for a reason to have perceived change? I am not one for studies and statistics. I am one for gut feelings and experiential knowledge. Ahh, the path of Zen. That being said, and going off those trusted feelings and knowledge, I'm willing to bet it can be proven, time and again, that the perceived change was not change at all, but expectation. A person with expansive knowledge and quick wit can become speechless when his or her expectations of themselves are suddenly put on the spot or questioned, or their perception of other's expectations of them are suddenly brought into the equation. Picture the multimillionaire going bankrupt. Put that into a personal perspective. You can quite easily get yourself stuck all alone within your own expectations. Why did it take me five parts to culminate my thoughts on perception when it usually takes me one page to get the thoughts down on paper? Why did the flow of my thoughts start and stop, then start somewhere else, then stop again, start again, stutter, hiccup, cough? Because I was expecting a fluent one page grand summation. My expectations were getting too comfortable, in fact stagnant. I started taking great one page articles for granted. Subconsciously, I knew I had to make myself earn this one a different way ... but I couldn't put a finger on the reason for my writer's block and get it unblocked! Ack. The frustration. It took an outside situation, mirroring my quandary, and someone's very pointed question to get the stab across. Expectation. Right now I'm perceiving it as the root of all evil. It is absolutely amazing, the problems it can cause. And solve. Just stop and think about it. How can one day feel like good positive interaction, and the next feel less than stellar? Expectation. We don't expect anything spectacular... We get pleasantly surprised by the spectacular... We expect the spectacular... We lose the spectacular... We don't expect anything spectacular ... Lose your expectations. Free up your perceptions. Find your path to Zen. Copyright © 2009 Rebecca Halstead www.ThinkItOut.net All rights reserved

Thoughts & Insights #17 | Perspective Part 4 | Perspectives of Change

Sun, 01 Feb 2009 20:08:06 +0000

There's always more than meets the eye. Have you noticed? Even when it comes to knowing your Self. It seems I'm always meeting a new perspective, side, or understanding of my Self and my life. I've always known that I am a unique individual. I admit, too, I've not always known just how and what I was supposed to be doing with my Self - my individuality - let alone my life. Thoughts & Insights Issue #17 February 1, 2009 - www.ThinkItOut.net Perspective Part 4 | Perspectives of Change There's always more than meets the eye. Have you noticed? Even when it comes to knowing your Self. It seems I'm always meeting a new perspective, side, or understanding of my Self and my life. I've always known that I am a unique individual. I admit, too, I've not always known just how and what I was supposed to be doing with my Self - my individuality - let alone my life. I will be achieving the big 4-0 this year, and I'm quite happy and excited to claim that I have my unique Self not only intact but fully realized for the developing spirit it is. It doesn't matter how long it took me to get to that point. It does matter that there was a good reason. The reason? So I could share my experiential opus with others. It is funny that those talents I loved to use best in my childhood, the ones that got set aside upon attaining adulthood, those have now resurfaced and come to fruition. Gee, sometimes I think I could have saved a lot of time and agony if I'd had a better system at my back all these years. Thinking that gets me nowhere, but I still entertain the idea for the fun of it. Truth is, I know I experienced every moment without the ease of fast forward because, and for the same reason, everyone around me was going through the same thing. Why? Because we needed to learn our life work very very well. Because our children are the ones who are supposed to have that encouraging, supportive system (we wish we had had) at their backs. It's okay. I'm really not complaining. I have found my niche. Many others are finding similar niches. Thank the currents of nature, god, and all good things ... we're beginning to wake up! I still contemplate it though. Consider this: Upon reflection, or hindsight, have you ever said to yourself, "I thought I knew everything then, but now I know I knew nothing at all?" Have you come to that same conclusion more than once? Me too. When I slowed down enough to think about it, I wondered why is it so difficult to retain that important smidgeon of knowing? Why, in the middle of any given situation, is it so hard to remember that there's more out there than I can ever ... possibly ... hope ... to even come close ... to knowing it all and, maybe just maybe, this moment might be one of those moments that I should recall that little tidbit of intelligence sooner rather than later? Then I came across my answer. Experiential learning and conscious awareness (or conscious choice) which translates into perspective. At any given moment I get to choose my perspective. I can choose to stretch myself so thin trying to learn everything, or I can choose to pull my energies in and focus on what I do best. It is not so hard anymore. As a collective, we are beginning to leave the old way behind. The old way of putting a whole lot of effort into learning what it is we're "supposed" to learn. You know, those external, peripheral, material things. Reading, writing, and arithmetic are only the first neverending tier we are presented with as children. Next comes, history, social studies, and language arts. We cannot forget to cram in music, and choir, and science. Our young must have it all, all the time. They are little sponges, who don't know their own minds. We must dictate and choose for them. This has been the conscious collective's perspective. But there are voices who are beginning to question it, and turn the tide. We are getting ready to leave it behind. We just need to ask more questions. Ever wonder why so many of our youth have such a hard time choosing a career? Why is it so many of them struggle when it comes to navigating the world of jobs, money, relationships, and the politics of "how to get ahead" in life? My humble (or not) opinion is that we've neglected the fact that humans are still animals, and we are "supposed to learn" how to navigate our internal life, too. Everything but everything has been focused on the external factors. There has been no freedom of perspective. There has been very little allowance for experience. Timmy doesn't want to play football. Timmy got hurt the last time you made him play football. Timmy trusts himself. His experience with football really did hurt. Timmy doesn't believe or understand why he has to play football in order to "grow up and be a man". Timmy sees and hears someone important telling him he's not trying hard enough, he doesn't know what it's really like. Timmy feels that he is letting that someone down. Timmy stops believing in himself. Timmy does what he is pushed into doing. Timmy starts quietly building his new experience; that of resentment, lack of Self confidence, and lack of Self trust. Now he doesn't believe that he knows what is best for himself. Not a very pretty picture, yet too often true. Whether it is intentional or not is beside the point. Too many people are unaware of their manipulative, push, push, push behavior that gets them the response they perceive as being right. Too many people assume, "it was right for me, so it has to be right for you, too." Wrong. Take an addictive personality. If that person reaches adulthood, believing like most young adults that they're unstoppable, and applies that young addictive personality to accomplishing school, a degree, a job, or starting a company ... well, no one thinks the worse of them. They are putting their addictive tendencies into productive work mode. All the better for society as a whole. If it's not broke, don't fix it, right? But when the bright lights and lure of easy money get overwhelming or don't come so easily, and those addictive traits turn toward a substance more quick to satisfy, and the company or work goes broke and just goes away, people around the scene tend to ignore it. "He's just in a slump. It's just bad luck. Too bad, another victim of the economy ..." So, the addictive personality feels right, feels justified. It's not their fault it's the world outside, and bad luck. They might look around and tell themselves, "see, no one is saying anything to me,... that I'm doing something wrong, so that means I'm right. I'm always right. No one has ever told me I'm wrong. And even if they did, they're wrong because I'm right." What happened? That addictive personality was sent into society without guidance and a clear understanding of their Self. They never received congruent information about how they think, act, and react; about how they work internally. We can identify these traits from early childhood, but usually they get smoothed over, excused, drugged and covered up, ignored, or hidden away out of shame. Why not teach our children who they truly are, encourage them to embrace that person, develop that person to the best of their abilities and advantage? But no. For so long, everybody needed to be the same. Women need to look like Barbie. Men need to look like Ken. And both need to portray to the world that they are super in every way. Not just one or two unique, focused ways. For so long, we perceived a necessity to override human nature, and try to create super-educated multi-taskers. What we actually were doing was sending our children out into this world without the tools they needed to succeed with awareness and full knowing of who they really are and what they are here to do. We sent them out into the world without their own trusted perspectives and experiences. How can you deal with others when you don't know why you react the way you do? I will tell you how, you keep yourself convinced that you are right, maintain your Self defense, then stay true to the belief that it is the other person or persons who need to change. Right? Not so right. And that's only one personality type. What about the meek, the compulsive, the manic depressives, the do-it-yourselfers ...? From childhood, they didn't get encouragement to utilize their traits to their advantage, to find a way to help others with their unique qualities. We funneled humanity through a system of mediocrity and acceptable parameters. It's starting to change, but the how is a challenging web of fearful guesses and absolute certainties. What is the best and safest first step? What if we start with ourselves? What if we each choose to change our perspective? What if we each start to look around and recognize that there is a place for each of us in this world that is productive, helpful, and needed. Unique even. Those addictive personalities make fabulous fitness coaches, or business tycoons. The meek can be wonderful providers of spiritual enrichment. Compulsive people can really get an idea rolling. Do-it-yourselfers are able to take the idea and run with it. When acknowledged, even manic depressives (or bipolars), can manage and put their mood swings to productive use. When their energy is high, they can do more than most others put together. When their moods are low, it is their time to rest and go within. Let them do so without judgment. Our perspectives of what is expected and what to expect are skewed. We've simply been focused on control and directive, financial gain, and normalcy. We've focused on each one doing it all, instead of all working together so we can each enjoy doing what we love to do best. Thank goodness the opinion is growing that spiritual gain is the gain for one, which is the gain for all, for we all are one. Longstanding religions tended to nix the first one: you. But, now many are embracing the truer truth; in order to change anything you must first change yourself. That starts with perspective. This change is nothing less than a step in the right direction. That's why it feels so right for so many people. There are other areas, not just religion, that stick out like sore thumbs in society. Everyone knows we're doing education wrong, but nobody knows how or can agree what to change. Maybe we are not asking the right questions? Why do we send our children to school to learn the exact same thing as every other child? For some eighteen years, we make them believe they are all the same. Six to eight hours a day with no time, no give, no room for individual recognition or development of unique personalities and skills. What's the point? Burying our future in boredom and mediocrity? I know. We have to put them somewhere, so we can go to work and bring home the paycheck. It's all about the money and the toys. I'm not sorry to say that is simply ugly. What if all of us were to work more one on one? What if we made our kids, our real future, just as important as our work? What if we took our kids to work, and made them a part of our day two or three days a week? Talk about teach the world some patience. Remember hearing the stories about "learning the family business?" There are a lot of people with a lot to give and teach, and there are a lot of other people who could use their knowledge, young and old alike. There are still many more who really need to learn patience, but that's another article. What if we took the time to seek out an animal communicator to develop our child's love and natural skill with animals? What if we sought a biologist out to share their knowledge with our teenager's love of biology. Could we restart our education programs to allow specialists to teach twenty interested children their specialty for three or six months? Rather than have one person teach twenty or thirty students six topics that bore them silly for ten and a half months? Our children are learning to read, write, and do math in kindergarten now. Why not aim them at their areas of interest before burning them out on history? It's history! Why make them learn two thousand years of it over a period of eighteen years? Why not let them enjoy right now with what actually interests them? And if they lose that interest, allow them to move onto their new interest? If they want to learn history, they can learn it voluntarily in college. Personality traits and innate talents, like perspectives, exist for a reason. We need them. We need them for balance. This world has attained it's level of imbalance for one reason. We have chosen that it be this way. We've chosen manmade material success and lost our happiness through not perceiving our unique, individual, inner beauty. If we change our perspective and allow our true nature to shine through from beginning to end, imagine what the world would achieve. How do we change the majority's perspective? We don't. We change ourselves. We change how we value others into how we want to be valued by them. That's why things happened in my life the way they have. Since figuring that out, I have applied and offered my experiential knowledge to others. The results? The lucky ducks are getting the fast forward I was looking for! They are gaining all the insights it took me forty years to gather in a matter of months! No fair! But, oh! What the world will be like for these new generations ... Copyright © 2009 Rebecca Halstead www.ThinkItOut.net All rights reserved

Thoughts & Insights #16 | Perspective Part 3 | Looking for Answers

Sun, 01 Feb 2009 19:33:00 +0000

Why is it humans, the ultimate predators, feel safety in numbers? Is it because we are the only ones who intentionally hurt ourselves? Is it because we are the only ones who intentionally blind ourselves? Thoughts & Insights Issue #16 February 1, 2009 - www.ThinkItOut.net Perspective Part 3 | Looking for Answers Why is it humans, the ultimate predators, feel safety in numbers? Is it because we are the only ones who intentionally hurt ourselves? Is it because we are the only ones who intentionally blind ourselves? Consider the statement, "ultimate predators." Yet, a resounding majority of us have poor vision. Why? Ever heard the phrase, "use it or lose it?" I am afraid we may be guilty as a whole. Maybe we do not see very well because we never allow ourselves to experience the truth in darkness? We have this planet lit up like a parking lot when night falls. What are we afraid of? Could we actually be blinding ourselves to the very answers we are seeking? Are we giving ourselves the biggest, brightest sign in the universe, yet not taking the time to read it, perceive it? Are we literally blinding ourselves by not using the full range of our natural vision? Other animals aren't afraid of the dark. Why do we choose to perceive there is safety in numbers? Why do we believe a majority must surely be right? Is it because we don't trust our own judgment, our own feelings, our own experiences? Is it because we've chosen to perceive "they said" this is how it is, how it is supposed to be? Is it because we've manipulated and controlled ourselves so much that we cannot imagine the unperceived? Did we choose to be this way? Why? How can a young orphaned fawn survive to maturity on its own in the wild? They do you know. It happens all the time. What's wrong with being different? Is it because we are afraid of being labeled and outcast from the collective that we complain so much about? Is it because we don't ask ourselves enough questions? Why do we fail? If I sit quietly and contemplate that question, what comes to me? People fail because they are choosing to fail, and choosing to perceive it as failure. Why would anyone do that? I'm not sure, maybe because: They are afraid of change. Change takes more time and effort then they're willing to give. Change doesn't look like they perceived or expected, so they reject it. Even the smallest change must be acknowledged and maintained for the step that it is, even if it is simply to practice the ability to be quiet and contemplate a question. What about getting help? Can I get help for navigating this seemingly miasmic venture? Yes, of course. Just remember the same rules still apply. You will only succeed if you are able to perceive your responsibility for your own progress. The best professional help in the world cannot help you if you aren't going to commit to change lastingly and help your Self. The trick is to help yourself with their help, not to expect them to pull you up the ladder. How do you choose your help wisely? Listen to your feelings. Find one person, product, or activity that makes you feel good. Concentrating your efforts on them (or it) will make more difference, in less time, than trying one hundred books, promises, programs, or activities one after the other. They all worked for the people who created them. Trust yourself to find one that resonates within you. What do I mean by resonate? I mean, when you're browsing the internet and you happen upon a site that instantly grabs your attention. I mean, when you are reading someone's work, and you find yourself having a passionate discussion within your head; applying that work and those words to yourself and specific areas in your life. I mean when you feel a surge of powerful, motivating energy hollering, yes! I agree, I understand, I want to know more, I want to make that happen! I would say that those are all trustworthy signs that you have found the help that will work for you ... if you commit to following through with the open perception that you will not attain the exact same results as anyone who has gone before you. You are you, you are unique, you are different. In fact, why would you be satisfied with someone else's results? If you really want someone to guide and encourage you personally, talk to them first and see if you click. When you find someone you like, you trust, and you believe has your best interests at heart, sign up. Then commit to making it happen for yourself, not to them making it happen for you. They cannot do that. You have to change yourself one moment at a time, and be responsible for applying all those changes to your life for the rest of your life. Oh, and best beware. Don't deceive yourself with the commercial perspectives that say, "all you have to do is tap yours heels twice." You know you cannot affect a lasting change for the better without committing to the behavior and perception that achieved the change lastingly. You must develop conscious awareness and inner trust to adapt other people's discoveries (other people's help) to your experience. That takes time, and we all work at our own pace. Respect yourself. There is no rushing it. Try to rush it and your perspective will be seeing the lack thereof, and the true gift will pass right before your eyes. Then you hit the rut. Then you face starting over on the cycle due to the combined lack of patience, self discipline, responsibility, and perspective. You will get what you have earned. How do you know if you've found a good consultant (or coach)? After you've spent some time with them, ask yourself the following questions one by one. Don't put any other information, exceptions, or stipulations on them. Go with your first answer for each one. Yes or no. (These work for self help, too). Do you feel better: introspective, calm, and contemplative, maybe even excited, after working with them? Does your negativity soften? Do your questions and answers center inward after you finish working with them? Do you feel like you just talked yourself through your issues, questions, situations, understandings? If you answered yes, comfortably, to all of those, then you can rest assured you chose right. If you answered yes to three out of four of those questions, then you can be certain you chose a very good consultant or program. If you answered yes to two questions and no to two questions, you may want to consider reviewing your results openly to try to improve them, or you may want to look for a better match elsewhere. When are you ready for change? When a new perception shows up before your eyes and you recognize it for what it is, a call to action. What do you do in the mean time? Remember, it is exceedingly helpful if you actually try to live, enjoy, and earn a good life. It doesn't matter if you do it yourself your own way, or try utilizing someone else's advice. Keep your mind and heart open to new opportunities and fresh perspectives, and keep your energy positive by living each and every moment for what it truly is: an experience to help you get one step closer to your freedom; to your goals for change for the better, to conscious awareness, and true enlightened understanding. You'll know you are on the right path when past problems, frustrations, and irritants don't seem to bother you so much anymore. You'll know you've achieved a new perspective when your recovery time from negative situations grows progressively shorter. You'll know when you stop saying, "someone or something" must change. You'll know when you have made a lasting changed. Of course, that doesn't mean you're done yet. Keep life in perspective. There is always more ... Copyright © 2009 Rebecca Halsteadwww.ThinkItOut.net All rights reserved

Thoughts & Insights #15 | Perspective Part 2 | Change in the Moment

Wed, 28 Jan 2009 16:45:57 +0000

It's all in the perspective of the moment. What's your perception of that statement? There must be periods of time that are good and periods of time that are bad? But what's your perception of time? Mine says, when there is an instance of bad in my life, I can choose to focus on it and draw it out as long as humanly possible, or I can choose to accept it and let it go as quickly as I'm humanly capable. Same rules apply to the good instances ... I can draw them out for all they are worth, or take them for granted and lose them in a search for something better. Thoughts & Insights Issue #15 January 28, 2009 - www.ThinkItOut.net Perspective Part 2 | Change in the Moment It's all in the perspective of the moment. What's your perception of that statement? There must be periods of time that are good and periods of time that are bad? But what's your perception of time? Mine says, when there is an instance of bad in my life, I can choose to focus on it and draw it out as long as humanly possible, or I can choose to accept it and let it go as quickly as I'm humanly capable. Same rules apply to the good instances ... I can draw them out for all they are worth, or take them for granted and lose them in a search for something better. Things don't always look like what we were expecting, right? Well, I started carrying that reminder with me daily more than three years ago. It has not failed me once. When asked at the right moments, a chance to change my perspective is a chance to change my world. For better or worse is, of course, completely up to me. It is my perspective. It is my choice. Another way to describe it is to visualize life as a colorful upward path of rotating cycles connected by ladders. You will repeat the same cycle for eternity until you are able to change your perception of what occurs within the cycle. Change your perception and you succeed in seeing the full experience and grasping the rung of the ladder which takes you off that cycle. You achieve lasting change. Then why, after experiencing success, do I often get hit with another series of ruts that feel like tenfold the previous negatives, you ask? Because you still have expectations. Because that's life. You get off one cycle, climb a rung on the ladder, and get on another cycle. Once I trust and maintain my awareness and understanding of the change I create within myself, I can experience a change in my perception. Then I experience a new cycle. Once I perceive the new cycle, I recognize the tenfold negatives aren't old problems. They're new, problems. Then the tenfold negatives don't seem like tenfold negatives. They seem like a reward that I've made it to the next level of my life's challenges. I earn my ascension, I accept the next cycle of experience, and the old problems don't bother me anymore, unless I lose my perception and let them. It is possible to fall off of one cycle and land back in an older one. Sorry. So, I achieve another perspective, thus, I achieve the next higher rung on my ladder of evolution. Things that affected me negatively before no longer matter. The weight comes off my mind and my shoulders, and I am able to accept and move on to the next challenge. We've all heard of or had the experience of losing the job and perceiving it to be the end of the world, only to find it was the best thing that ever happened ... viola, problems are not problems anymore! It is all in the moment's perspective. Building these awarenesses, I can now perceive that my perceptions are becoming more expansive, flexible, and fluid. They are easy going, rather than rigid and controlling. I seldom find myself expecting a means to an end or an unrealistic reward. I am, in fact, much easier to please, and much more forgiving to myself and others. I perceive that I am still alive and, thus, still have much to experience and discover. I am now able to let go of the old bothersome cycles much quicker, and move on to the new and more challenging cycles - things I still need to perceive and change within me - more easily. Perceiving this means that I spend a fraction of the time frustrated and up against a brick wall than I used to. My life is much easier, nearly idyllic. My time is much better spent. I see more progress each week, each day, each moment, than I used to see all year. That is true personal growth. That is true self improvement. I can achieve and perceive a lasting change in myself by myself. I cannot achieve or perceive a lasting change in others by myself. They have to achieve it themselves for me to perceive it. I can imagine it. I can hope for it. I can put all my energies into it. But it will not be real. It will not be lasting. Not until they make the change lasting and perceive the change themselves. I cannot achieve or perceive a lasting change in the world by myself. I can imagine it. I can hope for it. I can put all my energies into it. But it will not be real. It will not be lasting. Only when humankind achieves a majority change of perspective, individually, will we affect the conscious collective. And only then will we perceive the world to have made a lasting change. But that seems so unobtainable. Only because too many believe it is unobtainable. Only because too many believe someone else should be responsible to change the world for the better. Only because too many believe they have tried and failed and are unwilling to try any more. Only because too many believe it takes too much effort for too long and for too little return. It will never change until we change our perception of what to expect, when to expect it, how to expect it, and where to expect it. We must change first, lastingly, before we will ever earn a changed world. Is that discouraging to you? Take a moment, then, and change your perspective. In truth, at the same time you are responsible for the world, you are only responsible for yourself. For you are the world. You can only change you. So, you can change the world. Simply by changing you. This is what humans named paradox. The collective conscious believes that if you can't see it first, it is too hard to believe in the possibility. So, humanity as a whole stays on its current cycle. So, what do you do next? You ask questions. When it comes to failed attempts at personal growth or self improvement, why do you fail? For one thing you are not failing. You are perceiving failure. What you are actually doing is experiencing. If you are trying to lose weight, lose ten pounds, then gain twelve back, you have succeeded in losing weight. You have also succeeded in gaining weight. Most people only see one perception: you gained more weight back. Why did you gain it back? Because you stopped putting in the effort. You did not make a lasting change. You only made a temporary change. And you failed to perceive your own success because it didn't look the way you expected. You sold yourself short. Change takes times, patience, self discipline, responsibility, and lasting commitment in every moment. Nothing less. If you happen to be repeating a particularly frustrating cycle it is most likely for one of two reason. You simply haven't seen or accepted all your perspectives yet. Or you have seen them and you are choosing to try to help someone else see them, too, before you move up the ladder. Usually, but not always, it is the former not the latter. (If you are in the latter category, refer back to the paragraph that begins with, "I can achieve..."). For the former's, the more you look outside of yourself and your perspectives for an answer, the more frustrating the cycle gets. Why the frustration? Because that's when the answer is right in front of you. You just don't want to see it for what it is. Those are the answers you are too stubborn to admit, the perspectives you are too stubborn to see. That's when there is a big discovery coming, an epiphany, a huge weight off the shoulders. Those are the perspectives that look way different than you could ever have expected. Amazingly, they are usually exceedingly simple, as well. Either you want to lose weight or you don't. Have you ever had an astrology reading or massage? How did they make you feel? Intrigued and amazed, revived and aware of yourself? When's the last time you got one? Why do we give ourselves a taste of a less than tangible perception, then believe it to be a hoax when it doesn't stay with us for the rest of the day, let alone the rest of our lives? What makes you think you deserve those good, wondrous feelings longer than a day, let alone the rest of your life, when you don't put any continued effort into trusting yourself, the change, or the astrologist, that it worked? When you put no effort into your desires or responsibilities, you lack self discipline. It's time to face the fact that you must earn those good feelings every moment of every day. Nobody gets to put in a little bitty effort and coast for the next twenty years. We can choose to perceive that there are people doing it that way, but that perception gets us nowhere, does it? Copyright © 2009 Rebecca Halstead www.ThinkItOut.net All rights reserved

Thoughts & Insights #14 | Perspective Part 1 | Awareness of Change

Tue, 27 Jan 2009 16:39:54 +0000

What was in my life three years ago is still in my life, yet is not in my life. If I look at it from one perspective, my life is mostly the same. If I look at it from a different perspective, it has changed dramatically. Thoughts & Insights Issue #14 January 27, 2009 - www.ThinkItOut.net Perspective Part 1 | Awareness of Change What was in my life three years ago is still in my life, yet is not in my life. If I look at it from one perspective, my life is mostly the same. If I look at it from a different perspective, it has changed dramatically. If you want to look at surface change, materially nothing is the same. Under the surface, too, within my spirit, nothing is the same. I am changed, yet I am the same. It is simply my current perspective that allows me to see both. I don't worry much about holding on anymore either. It's the things that really count that have stayed with me on my path, not just the past three years, but my whole life. Those important mental emotional constants of love and support, for example. They didn't always come from where I wanted them to, or in the quantities I was certain I needed, but they always came to me when I needed them most whether I was holding on or not. The people and animals I love are here. They have not changed, even those who have passed are still with me in my heart. Even those whose choices took them out of my every day life, they are still here in my world. It doesn't matter if I cannot see them. It doesn't matter if I cannot talk with them. They are here. I choose to believe they are here. It makes me stronger. It makes me happier. What has truly changed? My perspectives. And me. Those portions of my life which I decided needed change have changed, and only as much as needed (or as much as I was able to take). Many areas of my life, I thought at times, were ready for bigger change, more complete change. But those perspectives were self defeating. I wasn't ready. So, it didn't come out looking the way I expected. Smaller steps were necessary. Time and patience were necessary. And, with my change of perspectives, those small steps showed me progress. And, yes, sometimes it could be perceived as frustratingly slow progress. Nowadays I don't mind as much. I trust it is the progress I need and exactly how I need it. I trust my intuitive awareness without question now. How did I attain this state of confidence? I came to realize that I am in complete control whether I feel like it or not. I came to realize, too, that I have no control whatsoever. It's all in my perspective of the moment. Copyright © 2009 Rebecca Halsteadwww.ThinkItOut.net All rights reserved

4 Simple Steps to Set Your 2009 Intentions

Tue, 06 Jan 2009 21:10:28 +0000

At the beginning of the year, you may find yourself stuck between celebrating the success of last year, planning for the New Year and perhaps overwhelmed by everything you have on your full plate. You're not alone. Most conscious entrepreneurs go through this type of celebration, anticipation and yes, sometimes even overwhelm. That being said, the beginning of a new year is the perfect time to take some time to get laser-focused on what you want to experience and manifest this year. 4 Simple Steps to Set Your 2009 Intentions by Christine Kloser At the beginning of the year, you may find yourself stuck between celebrating the success of last year, planning for the New Year and perhaps overwhelmed by everything you have on your full plate. You're not alone. Most conscious entrepreneurs go through this type of celebration, anticipation and yes, sometimes even overwhelm. That being said, the beginning of a new year is the perfect time to take some time to get laser-focused on what you want to experience and manifest this year. For the past 6 years, my husband and I have always spent New Year's Day clarifying and writing our intentions for the New Year. This ritual is a highlight of the year and one that continues to catapult growth on all levels, and help me fully prepare for the year... mentally, emotionally, practically and spiritually. You've probably heard that the most powerful thing you can do to manifest your goals is to write them down! There is something about putting your goals in writing that begins to align the Universe to help you realize them (or something better). The following four step process is one of my personal New Year strategies. I hope you'll print this out and get started with your intentions today! Step 1: CompleteThe first step to setting clear intentions for the New Year is to feel complete with the events and experiences of the last year. To do this, simply reflect on the past year... beginning back in January. In your mind, run through the year noting the accomplishments, challenges, successes, growth, opportunities and gifts that you experienced. Once you've taken time to reflect on the past year, allow yourself to release anything that you may be hanging on to. Take several deep relaxing breaths as you envision completing the year and become fully present to this moment and all the potential that lies ahead for this year. Step 2: CelebrateNext, take out a pen and paper and write a list of everything you have to celebrate from the past year. Focus on all areas of your life, including spiritual (connection to God, meditation, spiritual practice, spiritual community, trust in Divine plan, etc.), personal (health, relationships, fulfillment, family, friends, community, love, etc.), financial (overall financial health, income, debt reduction, investments, money management, etc.), business (new strategies, marketing programs, joint ventures, products and services, client successes, gross income, profitability, support, etc.). Take time to complete your list thoroughly and review it to fully embrace your success and evolution this past year. Step 3: FocusOnce you finish completing and celebrating, now become focused on all that you want to manifest this year. Simply create the picture of this coming year in your mind's eye, getting a clear vision of what you intend to manifest and experience (don't write anything down, yet... just envision it in your mind and feel it in your heart). Again, as you did in Step 2 "Celebrate", be sure to include the areas of spiritual, personal, financial and business. Step 4: CommitThe last step is to commit your intentions for the year by putting them in writing. This is the most powerful step of the journey; it's the beginning of taking the vision in your mind and bringing it into reality. There are two different methods I recommend for writing down your intentions for the year, choose the one that feels like the right fit for you: 1) write a description of your year from the standpoint of January 1, 2010 including all the details of what has transpired during this year... be grateful in advance! 2) Write a bullet point-list of your intentions for the year in each of these 4 areas (spiritual, personal, financial and business). You can write your list on index cards putting one area of your life on a different card. Once you complete this four step process, there is one last BONUS step to include with all of your writings. And, that is to write "this or something better" at the bottom of the paper. Because, as expansive as your intentions and vision for this year are, God/The Universe sees so much more for you. There are gifts waiting for you that you cannot begin to imagine. So, enjoy being clear and energized about this incredible year knowing that you also leave space for miracles to occur. ____________________________________________Christine Kloser, best-selling author of The Freedom Formula, helps small business owners put soul in their business and money in the bank. If you want to discover how to integrate more spirit into YOUR business, then you'll want to get my F-R-E-E_ CD, "The Top 3 Ways to Tap Into the Biggest Trend in Business Ever." You can request this special CD by visiting www.FreeedomFormulaExperience.com.

Thoughts & Insights #13 | Winds of Change

Tue, 30 Dec 2008 16:01:02 +0000

Life is about different things at different times. It is retaining and developing what you learn in each experience that gets you to the next step of your journey, the next rung on the ladder. Thoughts & Insights Issue #13 December 30, 2008 - www.ThinkItOut.net The Winds of Change Sometimes Get Stuck Life is about different things at different times. It is retaining and developing what you learn in each experience that gets you to the next step of your journey, the next rung on the ladder. If you don't retain the lesson you don't move forward, or up. You remain stuck on the same rung or sometimes move up then get pushed back down. You may have noticed the lesson, but you chose to forget it and, thus, quit developing it and need to learn it again. Take the lesson of asking for help, for example. I learned to ask for help when I was a child. Then I forgot the lesson, and how easy answers can be attained with the development of it, when I grew into young adulthood. I, like many others, wanted to do it all my way. I wanted to prove myself, and do great things on my own. I lost a lot of opportunities with the neglect of that learned life experience. Some might call it stubbornness, others stupidity or blindness. It doesn't matter what you call it. Not learning my lesson in experience cost me several rungs on my ladder of life, several years of feeling like the world was beating me down. Then, I finally listened to what the world, and my life, was telling me, trying to teach me (again). I was beating my Self; pushing and holding my Self down. I was learning the same lesson a different way. It was the same lesson through a different experience. And it would have been much simpler, easier, and less painful if I had retained the first lesson I'd been given and developed it. But I didn't. I chose to relearn it from scratch, and it's done me a lot of good along the way, too. That lesson is now quite prominent in my mind, my heart, and my every day awareness. I share it generously with others. What exactly did I learn? Simple. I learned to ask for help when I need it. I learned to ask for help from those who are able to help me. I learned to not ask for help from those who are not able to help me. I learned that just because someone loves you doesn't mean they can help you. And just because someone is an "expert" doesn't mean they are the right expert for you. I learned that just because someone couldn't help you, that doesn't mean you should stop asking or looking for help. And sometimes, quite frequently actually, the only one who can help you is staring at you in the mirror. It is completely and totally up to you to make the winds of change work for you, and not get your Self stuck. I am choosing to learn from my experience, develop my skills from those learned lessons, and make a difference for my Self. Believe in your Self. You can do it, too. Copyright © 2008 Rebecca Halstead www.ThinkItOut.net All rights reserved

Thoughts & Insights #12 | Being Self Conscious

Mon, 17 Nov 2008 21:24:37 +0000

Self Conscious. When did the term take on negative or weak connotations? I wonder. Thoughts & Insights Issue #12 November 17, 2008 - www.ThinkItOut.net Being Self Conscious Self Conscious. When did the term take on negative or weak connotations? I wonder. It hit me today, that the multitude of healers, energy workers, average Joe's, and seekers of change are all chanting, looking for, and finding the same answer. We need to be self conscious. Not ill at ease. Not an object of scrutiny. Reverse the term and try it on in your mind: conscious self. Take it one step further. Conscious of my self. How's that feel? Conscious equates to awareness, right? Aware(ness) meaning: "knowing, realizing, conscious" in the dictionary. Not Old English. Awareness meant something more like cautious back then. But that was then, this is now. Self awareness isn't even in my old Webster's dictionary, so in my mind that means I get to make up whatever definition I want. It's my life, and I have a terrific talent for deduction. So, self awareness equals, self conscious. Makes sense to me. That leads me to make the statement that perhaps much of the seeming roadblocks to progress, change, and or success in life right now are tied up in simple semantics. What does the word spirituality drum up in you? How about work? Try on live. Is to "live" simply to exist? Or is it an ongoing, malleable process of change and resultant feeling? For myself, I voluntarily opt in for the latter. If you truly think about (and allow yourself to feel) any of these words: self conscious, awareness, spirituality, work, live ... are they not truly, each one, exactly what you make them? Take work for example. I can work on a project, whether it is hard physical work outdoors, or work on a writing project seated at my desk. Either can involve non-stop commitment of large portions of time. I've sat writing at my desk for up to twelve hours before. In my mind, I was productively working. My energies seemed to be self sustaining, and I felt great achievement and elation when I finally put down my pen. What do I make of that? My work came from my heart as a living, breathing, valuable thing; a thing of worth. There's another one: worth. Though my heart's work has not yet made the Oprah show, that doesn't mean that it does not have worth. Perhaps the value in my work is destined to be attained post mortem. I don't know. I hope not, but all I can do right now is believe in its worth to me and to others. Why? Because it feels right. I choose to believe that my work will make a difference for the better for many people. I can't worry or waste energy wondering when or if that's going to happen in a big worldwide way... I know that it has happened in small ways for many people close to me. That makes me feel good, but I still must be self conscious. I cannot let the lack of worldwide acknowledgement put up a roadblock to my continued work. I also cannot let the positive achievements I have attained, and acknowledgements from people I've helped, let me think I cannot do better or more or different than what I've done before, nor let that small kudos be enough to pacify my need and desire to produce more. What came before and what's upcoming aren't here now. If I am self conscious, I know that what's important is that my work feels right when I'm doing it. And when I complete my work, it is good, fulfilling, productive work that makes me feel positive, enlightened, contributory ... So, I choose my view: Work is a good thing, something to look forward to, and enjoy, and embrace for what it can do for me and for others right now. So, why do so many people (including myself occasionally) say, "I have to work," as if it is taking on the plague or a ten ton weight upon their shoulders? Is your work really that horrible? Is mine? No. So, is it the semantics associated with the word? Is it that and something more? Are we often mindlessly carrying on a tried and true habit of trying to convince others of our extreme burdens in the unconscious hope of eliciting some draft of empathetic energy? In my experience, it is much easier and much more fulfilling to generate your own energy from good positive work well done. Really, it's all in your chosen definition of the word. The power is all in your mind. I wonder, if we welcome the light of being self conscious, can we change this problem of semantics and break these old habits? Here's a thought to ponder: Humans are the one creature on earth who seek and strive to control every single thing on the planet ... except themselves. I don't know about you, but I believe good work makes anything possible, even conscious self control. Copyright © 2008 Rebecca Halsteadwww.ThinkItOut.net All rights reserved

Thoughts & Insights #11 | Old Energy

Mon, 10 Nov 2008 20:53:17 +0000

I feel as is if there is some wicked nasty being clawing at my back of late. The feeling comes and goes ... it was horrendously strong last night. What is it? It is the old energy, the old ways, the last throes of those who won't release their grip on the zone of acceptable misery. Thoughts & Insights Issue #11 November 9, 2008 - www.ThinkItOut.net The Grasp of Old Energy I don't know about you, but I feel as is if there is some wicked nasty being clawing at my back of late. The feeling comes and goes ... it was horrendously strong last night. What is it? It is the old energy, the old ways, the last throes of those who won't release their grip on the zone of acceptable misery. These beings like things just the way they are, but they won't admit it, no. To talk to them, they complain about everything, make you believe they are all for change. Misery, unfairness, and negativity permeate their being; but suggest change, suggest action and watch out. The tide will turn so fast, you could get swept out to sea. Words and arguments telling you "that's not the problem," then "that is the problem." "You are wrong" one second, and "you're right" the next. "That will never work," "you're not listening to me," "that's what I just said," "you don't know what I'm going through ...". Talk about talk in circles, these are the masters. Nothing makes sense. And you feel is if you've been hit by four Mack trucks by the time you finally getaway. What they're doing is making up every excuse in the book not to change while building the illusion that they are actively trying everything in order to achieve change. Listen carefully. The words point toward you and the rest of the world as causing the misery, and it is you and the rest of the world who need to change. None of these old energy people knows what to change, but they do know that "somebody must change it for them their way." Yet, in their minds, they have tried everything. They have changed so much in their lives, and nothing good has come of it. What have you changed, you might ask? Oh, do you have nerve. A dialogue of how they have changed their outlooks, their actions, their behaviors, and their opinions often spills from very convincing lips, but look deeply good people. There has actually been no true change at all from the old energy. The thoughts were there, but there was no carry through, no action, no commitment. The words of misery, unfairness, and negativity continue to fall from these irresponsible lips. Old energy beings either refuse or simply cannot see themselves in the mirror. They live a life of taking. They are what I have come to call Energy Vampires. They seek out other people, people who are making their way through the paths of life, and they bleed you dry of your energy. Try talking to one, and you feel it; the energy just draining out of you with every word that spouts from their lips. I don't believe it's conscious, not at all. I believe old energy beings are here to teach the rest of us how to grasp and live actively in the new energy. It is through living with them and only through them that we can learn how to navigate with assurance and action and productivity in the new. The difficult part, lately, is what feels like a continuous barrage of old energy, akin to a tidal wave looming overhead. Just when you think you have made it past all the challenges, just when you feel like you can breathe ... bang! Here is another seemingly old challenge shoved into your gut or thrust upon your shoulders. Just when you believe you cannot take any more, this world throws another lesson, another test down at your feet. And you must take it up. You must accept the challenge in order to move on. Elsewise, you will begin to absorb the old energy and fall backward in your path. Deny the challenge and the despair grows exponentially. It is much, much easier to take on the next challenge, then to allow yourself to slip back. But what do you do when you feel you just cannot fight anymore? The old energy feels so strong right now. Why? What is the point of continuing to take up the challenge when you are struggling in what seems like every moment of every day? What do you do? Stop fighting. Yes, stop fighting. That does not equate to dropping challenges, or falling backwards. By fighting, by rising up against it, you are empowering it. You are giving it energy in your desire to face it down. That in itself is old energy. That is not the way to take up this challenge in this new energy. The path is clear if you let yourself see a new way. Open your mind to thoughts and ideas that seem impossible, yet keep coming to mind. Unlearn the old. These thoughts of not fighting keep coming because you need to trust them. There is a better way. Trust that what you've known before is not absolute, and may look different altogether if you just let it. Most of the time, you can find the way just by turning inward. Silence yourself and your defenses and your need to "fix it." Turn inward and listen quietly. Just the peace of self awareness can open up the dam that has been causing your angst, your frustration, your growing despair and hopelessness. Allowing life to happen can bring the answers and fulfill the needs without a fight. Importantly, do not allow yourself to look outward for the answers. They will not come from the outside. They will not come from others. Your long term answers are alive and well inside of you. Stay strong and trust yourself. Make your decisions, choices, and actions for you. Commit to them. Maintain your personal boundaries, don't try to fix for others not asking for help. Don't overextend yourself. Help when asked for help, ask for help when you need help. Stay balanced in every direction, and you will navigate these turbulent waters of transition and change with much more ease and much less angst. Master your own energy, learn to be, and allow your life to unfold. Everything happens exactly the way it is supposed to happen. Copyright © 2008 Rebecca Halsteadwww.ThinkItOut.net All rights reserved

Thoughts & Insights #10 | Wrinkle Free

Mon, 10 Nov 2008 00:42:35 +0000

If this world was meant to be wrinkle free we wouldn't draw ripples into the water or puffy edges into the clouds. We wouldn't cry over the past or hope for the future. Thoughts & Insights Issue #10 November 9, 2008 - www.ThinkItOut.net If this World was Meant to be Wrinkle Free If this world was meant to be wrinkle free we wouldn't draw ripples into the water or puffy edges into the clouds. We wouldn't cry over the past or hope for the future. We wouldn't feel the agony or joy of each precious moment. If this world was meant to be wrinkle free we wouldn't get to feel at all. It is our choice, it is our will, it is our journey, it is our path to navigate each and every wrinkle we come across in our lifetime. Change is here, change is good, change can be for the better, change can be for the worse, change is necessary to experience, experience is necessary to live. It is our positivity and acceptance of responsibility that makes wrinkles smooth out. It is our determination to overcome and our ability to rise to the occasion that will dwarf the wrinkles to come. It is our trust in the world and in each other that will change the wrinkles into understanding. Copyright © 2008 Rebecca Halsteadwww.ThinkItOut.net All rights reserved

Book Review: Personal Development for Smart People, by Steve Pavlina

Sat, 08 Nov 2008 14:53:50 +0000

All you need is to be smart about your personal development. First and foremost, I have to comment on the name of this new book. Steve hits that nail on the head, for only smart people seek personal development. The fact that the contents then actually focus directly on the most prevalent points in the makings of personal development is just icing on the cake. This is one of the best written personal development books I've picked up. It packs a lot of quality truisms into a well-thought, powerful, and experience-based punch of matter-of-fact facts. Though Steve did lose me a couple of times getting overly detailed, I think that's just me. I know exactly what he's talking about, and I back him up one hundred percent. What he says is quite simply the truth. Regardless of your history, ethics, morals, religion, or other confining characteristics, Steve offers an across the board path to understanding some of the most important principles in leading a successful and purposeful life. His sharing of personal experience allows for a realism not always found in the self improvement genre. Where we often get a repetitive mantra or lecture on how to be good, how to embrace change, or how to initiate conscious living, Personal Development for Smart People takes the reader on a detailed telling of the journey; one that encourages open mindedness to the truly simple process of enlightenment. Simple, but not easy. Though the length of the book resulted in a bit of a burnout factor. I thoroughly agreed with all of Steve's concepts, understandings, and principles. Having successfully developed my own self improvement system through personal experience as well, I fully back the validity and accuracy of Steve's take on the process. You don't need certifications, Ph.D.s, or tens of thousands of dollars in education. All you need is to be smart about your personal development. ~Becky Halstead

Thoughts & Insights #9 | Solving Problems

Thu, 16 Oct 2008 15:29:52 +0000

Everyday life is full of trials and tribulations. No matter how we look at it, we all face problems. Some are big problems, some are small problems. Some are easy to solve, some just seem to have a life of their own, and keep coming back to haunt us again and again no matter how hard we focus on solving the problem. Thoughts & Insights Issue #9 October 16, 2008 - www.ThinkItOut.net The Problem of Solving Problems Everyday life is full of trials and tribulations. No matter how we look at it, we all face problems. Some are big problems, some are small problems. Some are easy to solve, some just seem to have a life of their own, and keep coming back to haunt us again and again no matter how hard we focus on solving the problem. There are a lot of different types of problems: Relationship problems, financial problems, mechanical problems, health problems, where to go on vacation problems ... What are the qualities of a problem? When you face a problem what do you do? How do you handle your problem? Do you sit down and make a calculated, educated plan of attack? Or do you hit it on the run and hope that you beat it out the door and never see it again? Have you ever faced a really serious problem that just won't go away, no matter how hard or how many times you try to solve it? Life is not about being fair. Most people will acknowledge that, but acknowledging that does not initiate positive, productive thought or action. Have you ever asked yourself, "what exactly are the problems in life about?" Having a clear understanding of purpose can evoke creativity, inspiration, happiness, and long term focus. So, what is a good definition of what the problems of life are about? They are about learning, adapting, and evolving to a higher level of knowing. To do so takes conscious effort. Conscious effort requires awareness alongside time, patience, and a desire to understand. Conscious effort requires active living. Within that concept, what is difficult is developing such a skill in today's world of necessary routine. Repetitive tasks take away conscious active living and therefore dull our awareness. Thus develops incongruencies, impatience, and assumptions, and out the door goes time, patience, and understanding, not to mention creativity, inspiration, and happiness. Think about your verve for life in childhood vs. your verve for life in adulthood. So, how does a person learn to Balance the repetition of routine living with the conscious effort of active living? Through personal growth. And personal growth encompasses the willingness to embrace change within one's self by seeing problems with lucid clarity, by learning, adapting, and evolving, and by applying a very simple rule of fact: If the problem is not getting solved, you are seeing the wrong problem. Learn, adapt, evolve. Copyright © 2008 Rebecca Halsteadwww.ThinkItOut.net All rights reserved

Thoughts & Insights #8 | Live by Example

Sun, 05 Oct 2008 16:45:04 +0000

We've all heard the saying, "lead by example," but not everyone embraces the theme anymore. Seems we're crying out for change. Have you noticed how easy it is for some to tell but not do? And how the listening to those "tellers" seems to be going out the door? Thoughts & Insights Issue #8 October 5, 2008 - www.ThinkItOut.net Live by Example We've all heard the saying, "lead by example," but not everyone embraces the theme anymore. Seems we're crying out for change. Have you noticed how easy it is for some to tell but not do? And how the listening to those "tellers" seems to be going out the door? Maybe we lost sight and purpose in all our details and long dialogues. It's like trying to read a top selling self improvement book, getting all excited with the thoughts and ideas and truths that we identify with in the intro and first couple of chapters, and then getting deflated after the seventh chapter of being told the same enlightenment a little different way than in the first chapter. We need to get the idea flowing, let it flow, then make it happen by taking some action. Repetition is an excellent inducer of memory, especially in the action arena. However, when overused in the telling capacity it effectively undoes the wonder and meaning we're trying to remember in the first place. Productive repetition turns tedious and destructive faster than you think. Be aware. Personally, I'm adapting a new take to the saying "Lead by example", and that is: "Live by example." It fits much better in this day and age of inspiration and enlightenment, don't you think? We could even stretch it, like a friend of mine did, to include praise for "examplory" behavior. Rock bottom is that we, as a whole, are striving to grab hold of our intuitive side, awaken and enlighten it, and live actively once again, rather than so thoroughly living the intellectual. People everywhere are wanting to offer themselves as their valuable commodity, rather than a learned education. Learning is a great enhancement to life, but it is not living life. Experience is the thrill, the spice, the true knowledge and awareness of life ... so why not live by example? Who wants to be lead anymore? The "been there done that" mantra is complete in its eradication of the human race's desire to be lead. It is wonderful, uplifting, inspiring, and freeing to see and be a part of so many individuals joining the growing ranks, embracing the true and honest movement to combine the powers of intuition with our useful but overdeveloped intellects, and truly make changes for the better in this beautiful world. Copyright © 2008 Rebecca M. Halstead All rights reserved www.ThinkItOut.net

Thoughts & Insights #7 | The Secret of Life

Thu, 02 Oct 2008 03:32:45 +0000

Don't shake your head yet! Because, no, this isn't another pitch about the law of attraction, though I do believe in and utilize that as much as I'm humanly able. No, this is a thought process in awareness; one that identifies one of the many facts of life. Thoughts & Insights Issue #7 October 1, 2008 - www.ThinkItOut.net The Secret of Life Don't shake your head yet! Because, no, this isn't another pitch about the law of attraction, though I do believe in and utilize that as much as I'm humanly able. No, this is a thought process in awareness; one that identifies one of the many facts of life. What's the secret? Life is nothing like you are expecting, yet everything that you are needing. When life handed you a stomach full of butterflies at your first day of kindergarten, it was giving you exactly what you needed: a premonition of great and wonderful things to come, along with the inevitable warnings for bumps to watch out for in and amongst your discovery of new experiences. Same thing when your first true love decided to be in love with someone else. Life was building your toolbox: your self awareness, your understanding, your experience based knowledge. And experience based knowledge is irrefutably the most solid, unforgettable knowledge available to you in this world. The funny part is that everyone knows this on some level of consciousness, but humans have the uncanny ability to downplay our own confirmed experience based knowledge ... in the face of emotional stress, or abbreviations at the end of other people's names, or under unfamiliar circumstances ... We tend to instill and embrace self doubt for some strange reason. You don't see animals self sabotage with such amazing repetitive success. They acknowledge that what is good is good, and what is bad is bad. Unlike humans who think, "Well, it wasn't so good last time, but I'm sure it'll be good this time." What? Why do we so often sabotage ourselves with the belief that something better can come of the same repetitious actions? Because we neglect to recall the Secret of Life: It's nothing like you are expecting, yet everything that you are needing. We have the thumb and the intellect. Now can we combine those with our intuition? Copyright © 2008 Rebecca Halsteadwww.ThinkItOut.netAll rights reserved

Thoughts & Insights #6 | 5 Basics Steps to a Better Life

Sun, 28 Sep 2008 22:43:08 +0000

#1 Let go your expectations, drop ‘em right there, mister (this equates to Awareness) Identify, Establish, and Feed your connections to life ... those things that make you feel alive. Thoughts & Insights Issue #6 September 28, 2008 - www.ThinkItOut.net 5 Basics Steps to a Better Life #1 Let go your expectations, drop ‘em right there, mister (this equates to Awareness)Identify, Establish, and Feed your connections to life ... those things that make you feel alive. #2 Be real, take the good with the bad and the ugly (this equates to Balance) Hear, Acknowledge, and Believe in your Self ... it's not all or nothing, happiness is in between. #3 Only move forward grasshopper (this equates to Choices) Commit, Commit, Commit ... you have to consciously make a choice to commit. #4 Remove thy opinions and comments (this equates to Ego) Troubleshooting Life's supposed Brick Walls 101 ... get out of your own way. #5 Good luck, bad luck it's all a state of mind luck (this equates to Consideration) Know that however much time you put into your quick fix correlates directly to your state of satisfaction. Ergo: Instant gratification last only an instant._________________________________________________________________________________ That's probably not what you wanted to hear, but isn't it what you expected? Why? Because deep down you know your answer will come from you, not me. _________________________________________________________________________________ Okay, I lied there are 6 steps ... but The Book of Communication isn't in print yet. Regardless, here's your hint: #6 Revisit the "Let go your expectations" advice with all your newly acquired Awareness in place (this equates to Communication). Learn to Communicate with Honesty, Congruency, Consistency, and most of all Awareness. It will change your life for the better. Copyright © 2008 Rebecca Halsteadwww.ThinkItOut.net All rights reserved

World Topics | Corporal Punishment

Wed, 20 Aug 2008 15:28:29 +0000

More than 200,000 kids spanked at school That title was in the online papers this morning. I don't follow the news very closely. I find the media unceasingly one-sided. I do have CNN and USA Today on my homepage, and glance at the headlines occasionally. This mostly because of the time we were at war and I didn't know it. Anyway, I saw this headline today, and actually had to post a comment on it. The topic is so pointedly ridiculous and blown out of proportion it is laughable to me and many others. When is humanity going to think it out? This was my post, I thought I'd share it with the many individuals who are moving ahead on the right track with ThinkItOut.net and the rest of the holistic movement: World Topics August 20, 2008 - www.ThinkItOut.net Corporal Punishment What a ridiculous world of excuses we live in. Take a look at "families" in mother nature, people. Corporal punishment takes precedence because getting the point across quickly often means life or death. As human beings we have abused our ability to reason and made it our excuse for doing everything opposite to what nature intended. Doesn't anyone remember the term "happy medium?" We should be doing things smarter; taking what mother nature perfected (life over billions of years), and using the knowledge wisely! Why do so many try to fix what is not broken? Spankings are not beatings, obviously, when they are administered correctly. And how can anyone say it's not the school's place to make a decision like that [administering a spanking]? Good grief, the school's have to deal with our children during their waking hours, not while they're asleep like a lot of busy parents out there! Why do you think the kids are acting out in the first place? They are seldom home (home is the safe haven remember?), they are never allowed quiet time (they are continuously told what they are supposed to be doing and getting ready to "go"), and they seldom get one on one with their parents. So many of them are in a life labor camp it is scary! Get up, go to school, come home, put your things down, run to soccer practice, eat a power bar or McD's on the way to football practice or dance, run home, do your two hours (or more) of homework, try to eat dinner on your overworked under-rested stomach, try to sleep for only six hours, then get up and do it again. How does that build peace, happiness, and moral responsibility? It doesn't. It builds up to burnout at age 9. It is a proven fact that an instance of fear is a perfectly healthy stressor in life for animals. Without it they lose their edge. Hint: humans are animals. For some reason we just think we're better than the rest. You don't see any excuses in the wild. They either join the community in a positive and productive way, or they get kicked out. If we'd quit babying ourselves and making excuses, we'd quit burying ourselves in details and do what is right, the right way. Watch the wild kingdom in action. You don't see Mom and Dad beating their kids. You see Mom and Dad teaching their kids what's acceptable, what's not, and using "corporal punishment" the way it was intended to be used: with finesse, self control, and respect for life. Copyright © 2008 Rebecca Halstead www.ThinkItOut.netAll rights reservedBack

Thoughts & Insights #5 | Animal Communication 101

Wed, 02 Jul 2008 17:49:11 +0000

Maybe this should be titled, The Finer Points of Give and Take ... or The Oft Forgotten Finer Points of Give and Take. To give genuinely is to give what the recipient feels and believes they need, not what you think they need. To receive genuinely is to accept what is given as being the best that the giver is capable of giving. To solidify the trust, both must speak honestly from the heart. Here's a very concise example: Thoughts & Insights Issue #5 September 2, 2008 - www.ThinkItOut.net Animal Communication 101 Maybe this should be titled, The Finer Points of Give and Take ... or The Oft Forgotten Finer Points of Give and Take. To give genuinely is to give what the recipient feels and believes they need, not what you think they need. To receive genuinely is to accept what is given as being the best that the giver is capable of giving. To solidify the trust, both must speak honestly from the heart. Here's a very concise example: "I need a hug." "I can and will give you a hug." - or - "I can only hold your hand. It is the best I am able to do right now." Only speak for yourself. Do not speak for the other person. If you are the person being asked for help do not go into reasoning or excuses. Your needs are not the topic. You did not ask for help. Do not change the focus to yourself and how the request effects you. It is not about you. If you want it to be about you, you should learn to voice your needs at another more appropriate time, not subsequent to someone else's request. Here's an example of the oft forgotten part: "I need a hug." "You need a hug? I need a vacation. I'm working so hard. My life is so frustrating right now. You have it so easy. I don't see why you need anything, let alone a silly hug ...." "Okaayyyy ... Thanks for nothing." ... Nice, and yet that is where a good many of humanity's animal conversations so easily turn. Aren't we interesting? Copyright © 2008 Rebecca Halsteadwww.ThinkItOut.net All rights reserved

Thoughts & Insights #4 | Who’s Judging You?

Mon, 09 Jun 2008 03:43:32 +0000

Do you feel judged? When you are conversing with people you love, or with a friend, or even a stranger, do the words coming out of their mouths often feel like judgment? Where is it coming from? Why do so many people feel the need to pass judgment? Thoughts & Insights Issue #4 August 8, 2008 – www.ThinkItOut.net Who’s Judging You? Do you feel judged? When you are conversing with people you love, or with a friend, or even a stranger, do the words coming out of their mouths often feel like judgment? Where is it coming from? Why do so many people feel the need to pass judgment? Let’s take a look at it. The topic doesn’t matter. It could be politics, economics, household chores, etc. Let’s keep it simple: Say you’re walking your dog, and pass by a neighbor’s house. Your neighbor is out front and you stop to say hello and chat a moment. Of course, the first topic is your dog. Male or female? What’s his name? How old is he? Is he fixed? No? He’s not fixed? “My dog is fixed,” your neighbor comments. You feel the need to respond. “I don’t let him run loose. I just don’t feel it’s necessary to neuter.” Your neighbor responds with a smile, “Well, I feel a strong responsibility to reduce the overbreeding of domestic animals.” Would you get defensive if your neighbor said this in response to your dog not being fixed? Would you feel you were being judged? that you were being told you should have your dog fixed? And what about your neighbor’s side of it? Do you think they may have felt you were judging them? that you think they’re wrong to have their dog fixed? Why? Take your personal feelings and your negative ego (your need to defend yourself and make yourself right) out of it. Look at the facts: You made a statement that your dog is not fixed. Your neighbor made a statement that their dog is fixed. You defended yourself by saying your dog doesn’t run loose. Your neighbor stated that they feel it is their responsibility to the overbreeding problem. Both of you are simply stating your feelings and your opinion. Neither told the other what to do. There is no need to feel judged. Whether or not you were judged, doesn’t matter. If you felt judged it is because you made an assumption, jumped to a conclusion, and were judging yourself. You let yourself be led by the fear of innuendo. A lot of people let this self judgment habit follow them around all day. Some let it follow them their entire lives. Life is much simpler and happier if we don’t make up conflicts and problems. If the actual words are not said, don’t assume they are being said. Allow your neighbor their feelings and opinion, and allow yourself yours. Assume innocence, live innocence. Now, if instead, your neighbor stated, “That’s just irresponsible. You should have your dog fixed. Haven’t you seen the overpopulation crises at the shelters?” That, my friends, is an honest opinion followed by a direct judgment. Here you would be justified in feeling judged and defending your opinions if you feel you need to. Or you could just smile and nod, and walk away. Moral: Let sleeping dogs lie. Don’t kick them and wonder why they bite you. Copyright © 2008 Rebecca Halsteadwww.ThinkItOut.netAll rights reservedBack

Thoughts & Insights #3 | Are You Guilty of Sin?

Sat, 31 May 2008 01:18:01 +0000

Ever feel guilty? I’m not talking crime. I’m talking everyday human interaction. Maybe it was someone’s thoughtless comment that you’re selfish or did something wrong. Are you Guilty of Sin? Ever feel guilty? I’m not talking crime. I’m talking everyday human interaction.Maybe it was someone’s thoughtless comment that you’re selfish or did something wrong.You know you weren’t being selfish. You didn’t do anything wrong. You really have nothing to feel guilty about but, regardless, your mind feeds on it, you fear that you might be guilty, and you can’t let it go. It’s there at the back of your mind, waiting for confirmation that, yes, you should feel guilty. The one who made the thoughtless comment simply got their feelings hurt. But then, they sense the guilt in you. Consciously or not, they use it to their advantage; manipulating you, pushing the feeling on you, making it’s weight heavier. You’re sure it’s all coming from them. You really start to doubt yourself. Maybe they’re right. Maybe you are guilty. Maybe you were selfish. Maybe you should make amends.But then again, maybe you aren’t and weren’t and shouldn’t…. Maybe the guilt is coming only from you.Learn to recognize false guilt, stop it, explain your emotions or actions to yourself, and accept your explanation as well as your responsibility. Guilt is something like sin. We have been programmed to believe we’re prone to these faults; hence, we expect them in ourselves. Too often we don’t question their legitimacy. And, then, the buildup of false accusations, understandably, turns to apprehension, bitterness and resentment, often without knowing from where the negative feelings are coming.An interesting little tidbit I picked up from Eckhart Tolle in his book New Earth points out that original sin is recognized as the normal state of humanity according to Christianity. He takes that an interesting step further by sighting that “sin”, as written (in Greek) in the New Testament, literally translates as “to miss the mark”. So, in a nutshell, the original definition of sin is potentially and quite simply to miss the point of human existence. It does not necessarily mean you are a bad person. And certainly that wouldn’t translate to Webster’s definition: 1. the willful breaking of religious or moral law. 2. any offense or fault.Even better, Tolle then gives us the definitions for the normal state of humanity according to Buddhism and Hinduism. Get this: suffering, unsatisfactoriness, or misery for the Buddhists; the veil of delusion for the Hinduists. Hmm. They may have something there. This world is chock full of victims of unhappiness or unfairness on every corner. Certainly I can think of several individuals who I’d call self-deluded.If you think about it, you can simplify all this guilt of being a bad person into simply being human and either not getting the point of life or just not knowing your path. So, how you rectify being an unsatisfied or deluded human (or sinner) is completely dependent upon how you interpret your guilty deeds. Moral: When you feel guilty, just flip a U-ee and pull over at the corner called Contemplation.Copyright © 2006 Rebecca HalsteadAll rights reservedwww.ThinkItOut.net

Thoughts & Insights #2 | Dogs take what they get ...

Thu, 03 Apr 2008 15:50:40 +0000

Dogs take what they get ... One very important lesson I learned came from the animals in my life. Some people will identify with this, and some won't. People can take it or leave it, but this is what I observed: Dogs take what they get ... One very important lesson I learned came from the animals in my life. Some people will identify with this, and some won't. People can take it or leave it, but this is what I observed:Dogs take what they get. Horses give what they get. Cats give and take as they please. I have one dog, three horses, and five cats, presently. During the middle of my bottom-of-the-barrel, mid-life-crisis experience, I had eleven different stray cats (I'm not joking) coming and going around my property. What on earth did that mean? Well, I'll tell you what it eventually meant to me.The dog represented where I was in my life. I was giving too much and didn't know how to replace my dwindling energy supply. Maybe you've noticed: Dogs give endlessly for next to no return and still stay true. That's a wonderful trait, but certainly not fair for the dog, let alone a human being. So, being a fair person, I limited myself to only one endlessly giving dog. The horses represented what I needed in my life. And evidently what I needed was blatant honesty and a lesson in personal space issues. Again, I was giving a lot to the people around me, and feeling like I was not getting much in return (a glimpse into a dog's life), so I turned to my horses who, for the most part, give back exactly what they get. Now, understand, horses work mostly on an intuitive plane, rather than physical or material. If you walk up to them with a plastered on smile but are feeling madder than hell at someone, they know it and snub you or run for the hills. Anyway, the horses let me stand next to them in return for my feeding them, and gave me enough nuzzles, in return for scratching hard to reach spots, that I was able to maintain the energy level to give and take equally with the three of them. Plus, they are herd animals, so it is much easier for them to put up with our ridiculousness when they have constant equine companions, not just a two hour a week human.The cats, they represented where I wanted to be in life. That's why the message came loud and clear in the form of eleven strays. I wanted to be able to give and take with everything in my life freely without conscious effort or guilt or worry. If I called to my own cats they came when they wanted, or not. The strays came within sight, but kept out of reach if I got too near. If I left for the weekend, none of them cared because they can take care of themselves. They are free. I didn't want all those strays around, but I also didn't want them shot dead to get rid of them. Subsequently, in talking to a very wise friend, she asked me if I had asked them to leave.Excuse me?She said to tell them thank you for pointing out what needed to be brought to my attention, then kindly tell them they could go back to their homes.Feeling a bit ridiculous and a lot skeptical, I tried it the next time I went out to feed. Now, I kid you not, darned if they all didn't disappear within days. Shrug or scoff if you will, but you have to allow that my frame of mind was such that I couldn't see any other way out of the situation. I had tried everything else, so I was willing to try anything out of the ordinary.Afterward, I thought about it and realized many things. Take rejection, for instance. Reject a dog and he will leave you forlorn yet loyal. Reject a horse and she will mirror your rejection and leave you with fear, anger, or whatever you sent her away with. Reject a cat and she will leave you with indifference, for cats take nothing personally. Copyright © 2008 Rebecca HalsteadAll Rights Reserved www.ThinkItOut.net

Thoughts & Insights #1 | Going with the Flow

Tue, 04 Mar 2008 16:55:59 +0000

I don’t know about you, but I’m running into more and more people who aren’t satisfied with the general norm. They are looking for personal answers. There seems to be a quantum shift heading toward more responsibility, more honesty, more intuitiveness, less control. Going with the Flow… I don’t know about you, but I’m running into more and more people who aren’t satisfied with the general norm. They are looking for personal answers. There seems to be a quantum shift heading toward more responsibility, more honesty, more intuitiveness, less control.It can be extremely challenging to live in this world shift. The things that are out of our control are scary: the natural extremes like weather and quakes, the economy (yeah, someone is controlling it, but it isn’t me …), you know what I’m talking about. What’s interesting is, if you know how to not get caught up in the fear, if you simply roll with the punches and go with the flow; it just feels neutral, not so scary. You still hit bumps, but they don’t seem so big.Then, if you watch the people who don’t know how to go with the flow, it is almost comical. They will scramble to come up with every indignation, every excuse, every reason in the world why life is not giving them what they want or expect. From neutrality, you can clearly see that their only problem is themselves.Picture a strong flowing river, and put yourself in an inner tube on it. Imagine floating along having fun with your friends, being aware of your surroundings but not worried. Then picture yourself when you see the big tree across the right side of the river up ahead. You go into scramble mode and try to paddle to the left side, but it seems like the more you paddle the more you head straight for the tree … Your friends, meanwhile, haven’t seen the tree and are still relaxed, enjoying the ride. While you’re scrambling to control the influence surrounding you, your friends simply continue to float along with the flow of the river. They go with the flow and sail right past the tree and all the snags surrounding it. Moral: There is truth to the saying, “what you don’t see can’t hurt you.” We just need to learn when not to look.Copyright © 2006 Rebecca HalsteadAll Rights Reserved www.ThinkItOut.net