SLIM PHATTY

My Life: Update 2

2020-05-30T11:15:00.000-07:00

Most people know me for my quotes and vlogs about love and life. However, my true passion is helping people; through my quotes, videos, writings, activism, and community service.

Well, what have I been up to? Since I’m a firm believer in practicing what you preach, I have been focusing on my education. I just graduated with my master’s degree (4.0 GPA), and I will be starting my PH. D this fall. So, I hope you guys have not been worried about me, and I hope you guys are okay as well.

2020 has not been a great year at all. So I know a lot of you have suffered and are still suffering from the damage caused by Covid-19 and racism. I’m still not over the Trayvon Martin murder, and I never will be. I’ll never get over the fact that he was hunted down, murdered, and then blamed for it all. It hunts me that his murderer is still walking around freely and taunting Trayvon’s family.

At the same time, I am still fighting for the Delucca Rolle case. Thanks to YOU all, my petition reached over 85,000 signatures, Delucca was released from jail, and the officers were fired/charged. However, the fight is not over until they are convicted. Presently, the officers are filing various motions, including immunity under the Stand Your Ground law. They ‘feared for their life.’ Same story, different day. If you have not signed the petition, sign it now http://chng.it/Zs4xBNKynv.

And just when I thought 2020 could not get any worse, another murder happens. The murder of George Floyd. A modern-day lynching. A cold-hearted racist kneeled down on his neck while he pleaded for his life. While he pleaded for his Mother. While he stated that he could not breathe. That murderer treated him as if he was not an equal, a human being deserving of life. I am sick of it. We are all sick of it. Now, they’ve given George Floyd’s murderer bail. BAIL? A murderer should not be eligible for bail. This is just another slap in the face—a blatant disregard for the lives of black people.

Keep protesting! #BlackLivesMatter

Also, take care of yourself as best as you can, don’t be too hard on yourself and realize that things will get better over time.

XOXO

SlimP

My Life: Update

2019-04-11T20:44:00.001-07:00

Hey everyone! :) I know it has been a while since I've posted anything but I'll be back online very soon with more quotes, videos, and petitions for change. I hope you guys are remembering your self-worth and that you're still chasing after your goals. If not, I hope you get back on the right track soon and that I'll inspire you to do so. I apologize for leaving for so long because I know that a lot of you counted on me for motivation. I feel that I've let some of you down and I apologize for that. I know it won't make up for the disappointment that you feel but on Sunday I'll make sure that most of my self-help Kindle eBooks are free to download.

I'm a firm believer in practicing what you preach, therefore, I have been following my own advice and chasing after my own goals. I graduated with honors and I'm almost done with my Master's degree. Also, this year I'll be applying for Ph.D. programs, so wish me luck.

Plus, I'm working on other goals as well and I just started a new petition about an hour ago that I think will help a lot of people, if I get enough signatures. I'm going to make a video about the petition and an update video (for Youtube).

XOXO

Slim Phatty

Letting Go Of Mr. Wrong: A woman's guide to realizing her self-worth

2017-03-29T22:23:00.002-07:00

When you know your worth letting go of Mr. Wrong is easy. However, until a woman knows her worth she will put up with Mr. Wrong. Mr. Wrong usually has a lot of the qualities a woman is looking for in a man such as confidence, charm, good sex and a masculine personality. One thing about Mr. Wrong is that he never gives a woman 100% of himself, and this leaves a woman wanting more. If Mr. Wrong is giving a woman 60% she will spend months or years trying to get the other 40% from him. A woman should realize that a man that isn’t giving her 100% doesn’t plan on keeping her around or fully committing to her or the relationship. Realize that if a man isn’t giving himself to you it’s because he doesn’t want to, and you can’t make a man do something that he doesn’t want to do. In fact, the more pressure and demands you place on him the more he’ll rebel against you. Mr. Wrong doesn’t give you his all because he doesn’t want to or because you’re not what he wants. Most women are nurturers, and they think that taking care of a man emotionally, sexually, financially, and always being there for him will eventually make him act right or fall in love with them. However, Mr. Wrong never acts right for long. If he does change it will be temporary, and he’ll soon revert back to his same old tricks. Usually, Mr. Wrong acts right just to get back on a woman’s good side, but as soon as his foot is back in the door, and he’s out of the dog house he acts up again. Once a woman realizes her worth she leaves Mr. Wrong because she knows she deserves more than what he’s offering her. She refuses to settle for scraps and bones because she wants the full course meal. Her love of herself and her life is more important than holding onto a man that isn’t treating her right. This guide will go over the different types of Mr. Wrongs, and how to let go of them. In order to let go, you must realize your self-worth, and this guide will help you with that as well.

This is an all in one guide for women

1. Help you realize your Self-worth

2. How to let go of Mr. Wrong

3. Types of Mr. Wrongs

4. How to Avoid Getting Played

5. Best Player Signs List

6. Raise your Self-Esteem

7. Raise your Self-Confidence

8. Motivate you to better your life

9. Facts about men

10. Prepare you for Modern Day Dating

CLICK HERE TO PURCHASE ON AMAZON

I traveled to see this woman, is she into me or not

2017-03-24T22:08:00.001-07:00

Q.

Hi, I have a question a girl is using me or possibly talking to other guys in a LDR. This is someone whom I have known for a long time off and on-or at least I thought I knew her? I went to go and visit her and her family a while back; I really love her children and mother, but I was picking up or noticing things that did not seem quite right or the same? (RF-1) When I was making plans to come see her and then probably could not- she is a ocean away from me, she got a really big attitude over the phone and said, " If you are coming, then come. If not, just let me know. I have plans". I felt really bad and yes I wanted to see her so I made her a priority. (RF-2) When I went to see her she never wanted to hold hands with me or let me kiss her on the cheek- public or private. She said it was due to her children being around and that it was her customs. She was not like that before along time ago. She used to be very affectionate. (RF-3) She was always on her phone texting, reading and receiving messages and was giggling a few times when I was with her instead of talking to me. She tried to explain who it was a friend, but i did not really care about it. (RF-4) At one point when I went to see her in her country, I remember that it was night time and I was talking on the phone to her, she was home and said that she was very tired and said that I should go out somewhere and enjoy myself and have a good time,..by myself. (RF-5) When I seen her sister, there was this look that her sister gave me- only was a few seconds, but it was enough. Her sister would usually smile at me and say hi, but this time her eyes and facial expression was that of sadness, pity or that she kind of knew something that I did not. Can't really put my finger on it? (RF-6) When I was in the car with her and her child, the phone rang and her child said that it is dad mom. She immediately looked at me and told me not to say anything when they were talking on the phone. I thought she was divorced or should that matter? (RF-7) After I returned home what I really noticed was that, before I went to see her, we were constantly talking, video chatting, or sending texts back and fourth. Quality messages. What I started to see happen was that the time that it took for her to reply my texts messages went from hours, days, weeks. And that is if she ever reply's back at all. She told me that she had to move her and the kids to another city and now the frequency of her texts are around two to three months I think- could be longer. I figured well I will give her, her space and quit calling-she will not pick up anyway, even texting or emailing to her. But when I do that she contacts me after two months and ask what is going on? Why am i not texting her, emailing her, or using social media? she starts again with her pet names, like, baby or sweetie and she always says I love you to me. she then demands that I text or message her and when I do, no reply back? She does not text or talk to me on social media, but she is constantly online, either FB or on her phone. like every hour. Also she has her privacy settings set on all her social media so it is very hard to track or see what she is doing. But I know something is going on.

A.

She's not into you. Most of the 'she's not into you' signs are in your post. She ignores your text for months or doesn't reply at all, she doesn't want you to kiss/touch her in a romantic way, she told you to be quiet while she talked to another man, she doesn't want to spend time with you in person. and most of all your instincts are telling you that things aren't right. When someone is into you, they don't go months without talking to you. Listen to your instincts and stop ignoring the red flags. Find someone that smiles when they get a text from you and replies back to ALL of your text. Find someone that will be happy to spend time with you and show you love and affection. Find someone that doesn't play games by telling you to be quiet while they're on the phone with someone else. You shouldn't have to hide your presence or be someone's secret. You shouldn't travel to see someone that doesn't want to spend time with you while you're there. I hope you realize this and move on to someone that will appreciate you and I hope you're not giving this woman anything else. She blows hot and cold and she keeps you around to stroke her ego or to get other things from you (use you for something). Good Luck.

Are they into you or not, find out NOW by taking my short quiz. Fellas click here and Ladies click here to take the quiz Ladies read 'Letting Go Of Mr. Wrong'
Fellas read ' How Men Can Avoid Getting Played'

Asking These Getting To Know You Questions Can Tell You A Lot About them

2017-01-26T06:54:00.003-08:00

When you first meet someone you like them because you only know the good things about them. They haven't shown you their bad side yet because they are trying to make a good impression. They haven't argued with you yet and they haven't been upset with you yet. Have you seen their bad side? Have you seen them when they are angry? How do they handle their anger? How do they handle their problems? You don't know anything bad about them yet, that's why you like them. You like the person that you IMAGINE that they are. Also, it goes both ways, they don't know you yet. Therefore, their interest in you is ONLY based on what you've shown them so far and what they've IMAGINED about you.

Until you've seen all sides of them, the good and the bad, you don't know them.

Until they've seen all sides of YOU, the good and the bad, they don't know you yet.

That's why you shouldn't rush relationships!

If I only knew good things about everyone, I would like everyone too.

Think about your ex. You liked them until you saw their bad side.

How to see their bad side?

Talk to them about important things in life and have debates with them, not arguments but debates. Ask them questions to check their morals and beliefs. Ask them questions about their political beliefs or other controversial issues. Questions like "What do you do for fun?" are okay but it doesn't tell you anything deep about that person. That question only tells you something GOOD about them. You need to dig deeper, below the surface and find out who they really are and what they believe in to see if you're compatible with them. It's important to talk about issues that you are passionate about because you don't want to get involved with someone that goes against things that you are passionate about. Ask open-ended questions that require deep thought and more than one-two word responses.

What do you think about abortion?
What're your religious beliefs?
What role should a woman or man play in a relationship?
(Insert questions that you need to know)
(Insert questions that you are passionate about)
What do you think about cheating?
What do you consider cheating?

These questions should be asked in person, through video chat or on the phone. Not through text or email.

Enjoy the getting to know you stage but REMEMBER that you don't know them yet and they don't know you either, so you should take it slow. Having sex with someone before you even know their morals or values isn't a great idea but that's another topic. Until you've seen ALL SIDES of them you don't know them and until you've shown them ALL SIDES of YOU they don't know you.

Men click here NOW to see if she's into you

Ladies click here NOW to see if he's into you.

Procrastination ruins Resolutions

2017-01-26T04:53:00.002-08:00

Procrastinators usually get things done but usually, it's at the last minute, right before the deadline. Doing things at the last minute works for some things but not all things and unfortunately, it usually doesn't work for New Years Resolutions. Why? Because when a procrastinator makes a New Year's Resolution they know that they have until the end of the year to accomplish it. Therefore, they do what procrastinators do and that is to put it off until it's close to the deadline. What usually happens is that around October or November the procrastinator realizes that they've slacked the whole year and then they try to get something done before New Year's Eve. Of course, by then it's too late because most resolutions require more than a month or two to accomplish. So the procrastinator pushes it off until the next year and the cycle repeats itself.

If you have this issue the best thing you can do is use your weakness or issue to your advantage. Your issue is that you love a challenge. You love showing off your ability to pull things off at the last minute. There have been times where you've gotten a million things done at the last minute and you even surprised yourself. Since you're so great at doing things at the last minute you've made it a part of who you are. Should you change, yes, because procrastinating causes unnecessary stress. However, that's another topic. Well, to use this issue to your advantage you need to set up deadlines for some of your goals or resolutions and these deadlines need to be placed somewhere that you frequent. A BIG wall Calendar is the best thing that you can get. Amazon has them for five bucks . Place it in your bedroom, office, bathroom or kitchen and look at it every day. It states desk calendar but you can hang them as well. The small calendars don't work because they can easily be overlooked and they don't have enough room for you to write on. Big lettering is best because it can be seen from a distance. If you meet the deadline, draw a smiley face or heart on that day. If you don't meet the deadline, draw a sad face on that day. Setting up deadlines will trigger the part of your brain that ONLY works hard to meet deadlines. Drawing a sad or smiley face on your deadline days will motivate you to get more smiley faces. After all, you like rewards, not punishments. You love a challenge, that's why you work hard at the last minute to get things done. It challenges you and you feel proud of yourself for pulling off great things at the last minute. Another way to use your need for a challenge is to sign up for challenges that hold you accountable for your actions and offer rewards. Basically, you need to understand your need for deadlines and accountability. Having deadlines motivates you to get things done by a certain date, not having a deadline leads to you procrastinating things forever and sometimes it holds you back from accomplishing things that will make you really happy. Get started on your deadline calendar NOW and good luck.

ps. The cool thing about wall Calendars is that you can see your progress and you can save the months that you really like, for memories sake. Also, they are big enough to use for all of your weekly reminders and appointments.

5 Reasons Some New Year's Resolutions Fail

2017-01-25T15:25:00.003-08:00

Some people have a whole list of things that they swear that they'll change as soon as the clock strikes 12 on New Year's Day. However, unless you've been planning to make a drastic New Year's eve change and you're MENTALLY ready to make that change it will fail. You can't go from the old you to the new you just because the clock strikes 12. Telling yourself that you can is setting yourself up for failure and disappointment. My advice is to be realistic and follow the below tips

1. Give yourself time to adjust to your new changes. Assuming that you can change overnight will lead to you feeling like you've already failed after about 3 days of the New Year. Allowing yourself time to make changes or take steps leads to less disappointment.

2. People aren't ready to change and they're comfortable with the way that their life is now. Now, I didn't say that they were happy with their life, I said that they were comfortable. When someone is comfortable with their life they don't feel that they need to change NOW or immediately. Why should they change NOW when they're enjoying their life without even accomplishing that goal or resolution? So, they make that goal or resolution wait until they feel like taking action. This leads to years and years of having the same goal or resolution. This type of person is usually SAD once the new year rolls around because they haven't accomplished their goal. Did they enjoy the year that just passed, yes or maybe but did they accomplish a goal or resolution that they really wanted to accomplish, no. Why? The goal or resolution requires them to leave their comfortable box and do things that are uncomfortable or unenjoyable. So, every time they get uncomfortable and things aren't fun or enjoyable they go back to their comfortable box. This cycle keeps repeating UNTIL they decide that they'll stay in the uncomfortable box until they WIN, even if it's not fun or enjoyable. You can't go through life expecting everything to be comfortable and enjoyable. Well, you can but then you'll never ACCOMPLISH things that require you to be uncomfortable, things that are boring and require hard work. Realize that the uncomfortable thing will lead to something that is more comfortable than what you have now. Why do you keep making that same New Year’s Resolution? It's because it's something that you REALLY want to accomplish. Are you willing to be uncomfortable and do things that are unenjoyable? If not, you won't reach your goal.

3. Be realistic. If you've been threatening to cut off that one person for the last few years and you're still holding onto them that means that you're bonded to that person in some way. Until you get rid of that bond or connection that you have with them you won't cut them off. If you've been planning to cut them off for a while that means that they aren't loving you the way that you want to be loved or they aren't treating you right. In my book '25 Steps to Letting Go of Someone You Love' I tell you how to let go of someone that is wrong for you.

Also, if the person is a friend of a friend or a co-worker or someone that you have to see from time to time you can't cut them off. Cutting off someone only works when you don’t have to interact with them anymore. Therefore, instead of saying that you're going to cut them off, you should state that you aren't going to deal with that person on a personal level anymore and that you're no longer going to give them anything that you have to offer. You can't cut off someone that is forced on you, but you can stop dealing with them on a personal or intimate level.

Jasmine wants to cut off Tiffany because she thinks that Tiffany is a fake friend. However, Tiffany is a friend of the family and is invited to almost everything that Jasmine is invited to.

Rob works with Mark and wants to cut him off. However, at work he is forced to work beside Mark.

The above two people can’t completely cut off the people they dislike because they still have to be civil and speak to that person from time to time. Therefore, they shouldn’t make that a New Years Resolution.

4. Some people tell me that they're going to start being a jerk or a b*tch because they are sick and tired of people taking advantage of them and walking all over them. However, a week or so later that person is back to giving people everything they've got. Realize that if you're a genuinely nice person that you can't change your personality, You're nice and you'll always want to help people, even people that aren't there for you or people that don't deserve your help. Instead of saying that you're going to change your personality, you should state that you're going to keep your personality but you're going to stop helping people that don't deserve your help. Users and people that are never there for you don't deserve your help. However, it's okay for you to help those that are there for you and those that are in need. Using your kindness to help those in need and those that appreciate you will make you happy and it will allow you to keep your same personality. Just learn how to say ‘no’ to people that use you and only come around to get things from you. Would they help you if you needed help? Do they break their back for you? Do they call to see how you're doing? Do they care about you? If not, don’t change who you are, just change who you associate with. Be yourself but find people that appreciate you and what you do.

5. If you've had the same New Year’s Resolution for the last few years, it's time for you to reevaluate your goal and figure out WHY you aren't making progress. What excuses are you making over and over again? WHY isn't it getting done? Don't make it a goal if you aren't going to take the necessary steps to accomplish it. Constantly making goals that you don't plan on WORKING hard for leads to you feeling disappointed in yourself, year after year. Make sure that this is the last year that you have that same resolution. No more excuses, no more quitting and no more slacking. Get up and get busy. Learn how to motivate yourself. You can't wait around for someone else to change your life you have to get up and change it yourself? What are you waiting for? A miracle, a hero, a prince charming, a princess, a fairy godmother? Realize that the person that can change your life is looking at you in your mirror! They don't have a magic wand but they DO have all the tools that they need to get the job done. They're good enough, smart enough, strong enough and talented enough to get it done.

Are you holding yourself back in life? Take this quiz to find out NOW

Are you holding yourself back in life? How ambitious are you? Take MY QUIZ to find out now

2017-01-10T22:19:00.000-08:00

Are you Ambitious? Take my quiz to find out NOW!

How ambitious are you? Are you living life to the fullest or are you holding yourself back?

How many days per week do you procrastinate something by saying that you'll do it later?

In 2016, how many times did you quit something because it was taking too long to accomplish?

When you think you can't do something or you think that you'll fail you

Are you afraid to try something because you're afraid of what people will think or say about you?

When you're chasing your goals and problems come up

After you fail something

How many life changing goals are you chasing right now

How many excuses do you usually make per day? I'm too tired. I don't have time. I can't do it etch

Do you give up on things that are too hard

Are you proud of what you've done so far in life

13+ You're ambitious. Keep it up and keep on pushing yourself to do more. Stay focused and remember that there's always room for improvement or growth. There's always something that you can do to improve yourself or your life
9-12 You're somewhat ambitious. But you need to be more focused and more determined. You've set limits for yourself and those limits are holding you back in some areas of your life. Push yourself past your own limits or better yet remove those limits altogether. You're smart enough and strong enough to go further than you think you can.
5-8 You're holding yourself back in life. If you're unhappy with your life it's because you aren't doing everything you can to better your life. You're justing doing the minimum. Start doing the maximum and your life will improve. Step outside of the box and don't be afraid to try new things. Less talk and more action.
0-4 You're definitely holding yourself back in life and you lack ambition and motivation. Your life won't improve until you believe in yourself and fight for yourself. Less talk and more actions. Stop talking about it and get up and do something about it. Actions speak louder than words. Stop giving up on yourself. Let yourself be GREAT

March Birthdays on Twitter

2017-01-07T14:10:00.000-08:00

MARCH TWITTER BIRTHDAY CALENDAR

On your birthday you will get a GROUP shoutout from me to Wish you a Happy Birthday. Solo shout outs will only be given if you're the only one with that birthday. @SlimPhatty with your birthdate to add your name to the calendar. Must be following me.

.
.
.
.
.@_slimNOTthick
.@DwThaone1
.
.
.@Juliachantel24
.@boyythatssmyaa
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.@honeydunch @JodiiJodii @deungelafields
.
.
@stxrline .
.
.
.@Anebabee_
.
.@keneshajamia
.
.
.
.@xBadderThanYOU

February birthdays on Twitter

2017-01-07T13:47:00.001-08:00

FEBRUARY TWITTER BIRTHDAY CALENDAR

On your birthday you will get a GROUP shoutout from me to Wish you a Happy Birthday. Solo shoutouts will only be given if you're the only one with that birthday. @SlimPhatty with your birthdate to add your name to the calendar. Must be following me.

January Birthdays on Twitter

2017-01-07T13:42:00.000-08:00

JANUARY TWITTER BIRTHDAY CALENDAR

On your birthday you will get a GROUP shoutout from me to Wish you a Happy Birthday. Solo shoutouts will only be given if you're the only one with that birthday. @SlimPhatty with your birthdate to add your name to the calendar. Must be following me.

Is SHE using you or not? Take MY QUIZ to find out NOW

2017-01-06T01:39:00.001-08:00

Is she USING you? Take MY QUIZ and find out NOW

Is the girl you're interested in using you? Take MY QUIZ and find out NOW. quiz by Sonya Parker

She calls me when

I will describe our situation as

Does she ever call you just to see how you're doing, without wanting anything from you

Are you having sex with her?

Does she ever invite you anywhere? Not a self-invite but a real invite?

Does she say 'thank you' when you do things for her

Does she get mad at you if you say no to her request?

Are you paying any of her bills?

Has she ever given you anything

Does she constantly ask you for things

How often do you give her money

Does she kiss you

Click 'Grade Me' to see your score.
Scored 19 or more? She isn't using you, she considers you as a friend that she can count on. She might even LIKE you as more than friends.
Scored 15-18? She considers you as one of her friends. She isn't intentionally trying to take advantage of you. This is mostly a give and take friendship because she isn't just taking from you. She offers you something in return for your kindness whether it's friendship, emotional support, social activities, an ear, fun, advice etch.
Scored 10-14? You're more of an acquaintance than a close friend. However, she isn't intentionally trying to take advantage of you. If you feel used start saying NO to some of her request.
Scored 0-9? Red flags, she's taking advantage of you, start saying NO to her request. Never let anyone use you.

Does he just want SEX from you? Take MY QUIZ to find out NOW

2017-01-06T00:07:00.000-08:00

Are you a booty call? Take this quiz to find out

Find out whether you're a booty call, friends with benefits or potentially something more. Quiz by Sonya Parker
Answer the questions honestly, based on your reality.

Do you know a lot about him?

After you had sex with him did he STOP trying to get to know you?

Does he only hang out with you at your house or his house

Have you been to his house a lot

What does he do RIGHT after sex

Who does most of the calling and texting FIRST

Have you met anyone in his close family, like his parents or siblings, friends don't count

Is he there for you like you're there for him

Does he ever spend Holidays with you?

Does he act differently in public than he does in private

After you have sex with him how do you feel

If you had an emergency right now or you were ill would he help you out in some way

Does he flirt with other girls in front of you

When he introduces you to other people he refers to you as his

Does he only hang out with you at night

Does he ever talk to you on the phone

Does he ever call you just to see how you're doing, without asking to come over?

How long have you been sleeping with him

Click 'Grade Me' to get your score!
If you scored 23 points or more the guy doesn't see you as just sex, he CARES about you on SOME level. If you want more from him have a one on one talk with him and tell him.
Scored 10-22? You're a friend with benefits. He likes your company but he doesn't want to be more than Friends with Benefits
Scored 0-9? You're a booty call. He only wants sex from you.

If you scored low it's time to move on and find someone that cares about you. Know your worth, and don't settle for less. You're good enough you're just wasting your time on Mr. Wrong. Mr.Right will think you're good enough and he will love you and appreciate you.
Share this Quiz with your girls.

Is HE into you or not? Take MY QUIZ to find out NOW.

2017-01-05T16:43:00.000-08:00

This Quiz is for those that are dating not those in a relationship

Be completely and totally honest, go with the first answer that pops into your head.

Is HE into you or not? Take this quiz and find out NOW

Find out how he feels about you. Quiz by Sonya Parker

When you asks him questions he

How does he make you feel

He calls or texts you FIRST just to see how you're doing or what you're up to

How does he act on Valentine's day or your birthday

After you have sex with him

Has he ever told you that he just wants to be friends or some other rejection line

Have you met anyone in his close family, like his parents or siblings, friends don't count

Is he there for you like you're there for him

What do you usually do with him, activity wise. Be honest!

Does he act differently in public than he does in private

Click 'Grade Me' to see your score.
If you scored 11 points or more he's into you
Scored 6-10? They only see you as a friend
Scored 0-5? They aren't into you, drop them if they're using you.
If you scored less than 11 they're not into you and they're wrong for you.

Ladies read 'Letting Go Of Mr. Wrong'
Fellas read ' How Men Can Avoid Getting Played'

Is SHE into you or not? Take MY quiz to find out now

2017-01-05T16:10:00.001-08:00

Be completely and totally honest, go with the first answer that pops into your head.

Is she into you or not? Take this quiz and find out NOW

Find out how she feels about you. Quiz by Sonya Parker

When you asks her questions she

When you ask her to hang out with you

She calls or texts you FIRST just to see how you're doing or what you're up to

What types of hugs does she give you

Do you have to beg for her attention

Has she ever told you that she just wants to be friends or some other rejection line

Can you call her when you have a problem or need to talk about something that's bothering you

Is she there for you like you're there for her

What does she usually call or text you about

How often does she ignore your calls or text

Click 'Grade Me' to see your score.
If you scored 11 points or more she's into you
Scored 6-10? She only sees you as a friend
Scored 0-5? She isn't into you, drop her if she's using you..
If you scored less than 11 they're not into you and they're wrong for you.

Ladies read 'Letting Go Of Mr. Wrong'
Fellas read ' How Men Can Avoid Getting Played'

How to move on after sexual abuse, molestation or rape

2017-01-05T08:25:00.000-08:00

You have a goal but what's your plan?

2017-01-03T18:53:00.000-08:00

A goal without a plan is just a wish.

How many times have you or someone that you know said the following and it never happened

I want to open my own business
I want to start my own___
I want to do this or that
I want to start a project
I have an idea I want to bring to life
I have a goal I want to work on
I want to create this or that
I have a great idea that will make $$

The main reason that some of those things never happened is because you wanted to do it but you didn't make a PLAN. You SAID you wanted to do it but you didn't put ACTIONS behind your words. Always remember that actions speak louder than words. If you're going to do something, don't just say it, prove it. Secondly, you said it but you actually didn't believe that you could accomplish it. In my previous post I mentioned the importance of believing in your goal. Click here to read that post. If you don't believe that you can accomplish something you won't try to do it. Why? BECAUSE you think it will fail or you think it's impossible or too hard for you to accomplish.

People are always telling me what they WANT to do but they are stumped when I asked them the following questions.

How are you going to do it?
When are you going to take the first step?
What is the first step?
What is the second step
What's your step by step plan?

If you can't answer the above questions immediately that means that you don't have a plan. If you're serious about accomplishing your goal make a step by plan NOW. Get busy!

After you make your plan FOLLOW THE PLAN.

After you follow the plan and accomplish it you'll be proud of yourself :)

Good luck and I hope you make a plan and follow it. Make 2017 your year.

Read my Get Back on The Right Track list

xoxo SlimP

How to reach your Goals in 2017

2016-12-31T12:30:00.003-08:00

How to reach your goals or New Years Resolution in 2017

First you have to BELIEVE that you can accomplish your goal. If you don’t believe that you can accomplish it, you won’t work hard for it.
STOP making excuses! Your EXCUSES are holding you back in life. Your EXCUSES are killing your dreams. Your EXCUSES are making you FAIL!
Don't confuse difficulty with impossibility. Is achieving your goal difficult, yes. Is achieving your goal impossible, NO. So, you CAN do it
Don’t let other people’s opinions stop you from being great. Be yourself, be unique, be creative, be free. Do you! It’s your life not theirs
If you mess up don’t use it as an excuse to give up. STOP giving yourself a way out. STOP sabotaging your goals. When you mess up KEEP going. You messed up. So you're going to use that as an EXCUSE to give up on everything that you've done so far. NO, you're going to keep going.
Don’t be afraid to try new things. If it fails, you can try again. New inventions and new things came from people that tried something NEW!
Stop quitting because its taking too long to accomplish. The best goals take time. Learn how to be patient or you'll never achieve your goal
Stop looking for the EASY way to accomplish it. Some goals require HARD WORK. So, if you aren't willing to work hard you won't accomplish it
When you’re chasing your goal PROBLEMS will pop up but don’t use those problems as an EXCUSE to give up. Don’t let setbacks hold you back.
Never give up on something that will make you happy. If reaching your goal will make you HAPPY don't give up on it. You deserve happiness!
If you had a bad past realize that it's over, you were strong enough to get through it, and now it's time to focus on your future.
To reach your goal you have to do things that you don't feel like doing. If you aren’t willing to do things that you don’t feel like doing you won’t reach your goal
When you feel like giving up PUSH YOURSELF and you'll realize that you can go further. You're a lot stronger than you think you are.
Don't give up! In order to reach your goal, you have to be willing to fight for it, giving up will keep you STUCK where you’re at now.
Can you achieve your goal, yes? But the real question is “Are you willing to fight for your goal and do whatever it takes to accomplish it?" YES or NO?
Start NOW by making a 2017 to do list. Writing it down and placing it somewhere where you can see it helps to keep you on track. Another suggestion is to use the app 'Listaway' to make your to do list. If your goal requires a lot of work or steps BREAK it up into mini goals. Breaking it up into mini goals will allow you to see that you are making progress.

If your goal is to Go back to school and get a degree your list should look something like this.

Research schools in my area
Decide what I want to go back to school for
Fill out college/school application
Register for classes
Do all of my assignments.on time for a week
Do all of my assignments on time for two weeks
Do all of my assignments on time for three weeks
Do all of my assignments on time for four weeks
Get good grades in the Spring semester.
Get good grades in the Fall Semester.
ETCH

If your goal is to lose 20 pounds your list should look something like this:

Lose 5 pounds in January
Lose 5 pounds in February
Lose 5 pounds in March
Lose 5 pounds in April
Drink 8 glasses of water for one day
Drink 8 glasses of water 2 days in row
Drink 8 glasses of water 3 days in a row
Drink 8 glasses of water 4 days in a row
No soda for 1 day
No soda for 2 days in a row
No soda for 3 days in a row
No unhealthy fast food for 1 day
No unhealthy fast food for 2 days in a row
ETCH

The above lists are just examples, your list should be specific to you and have as many small goals as possible on it. Anything that you need to work on needs to be added to the list.

Every time you accomplish a task check it off of your list, that will give you motivation to continue.

If you like this you'll love this post

January Calendar

Share this with someone you love to help them reach their 2017 goals

Use Jealousy as Inspiration

2016-12-30T23:26:00.002-08:00

Jealousy is a normal. Everyone has been jealous of someone or something before. However, some people allow jealousy to take over them and they become extremely bitter and hateful towards others. My advice is to use jealousy in a positive manner instead of a negative one. When you're jealous of something it's usually because you want to be like that person or have what they have. If you were happy with your own life you wouldn't be jealous of their life. Therefore, the best way to deal with jealousy is to FIX your own life so that you'll be happy with it.

What changes can you make in your own life that will make you happy with it?
What steps can you take that will allow you to have a similar career or lifestyle that the person you're jealous of has?
What can you do that will make you happy?
Are you chasing after your own goals?
Are you fighting for yourself?
Are you focusing on your own life or other people's life?
Have you given up on your own life or goals?
Do you fight hard for what you want?
Are you chasing after your dreams or have you given up on them?

The person you're jealous of is going after what they want and guess what you should do the same.

Also, it's important to realize that you can't always have what someone else has because you're not them. You're you and you're unique and there's nothing wrong with that. You just have to find out what your talent is and what you can do to improve your own life. Instead of focusing on their life focus on your own life and find a way to use your own talents and skills.

Let them be great and fight for yourself so that you can be great too.
The happier you are with your own life the less you'll be jealous of their life.

Starting today, focus on yourself and your own life. Do things that will make you happy with your own life.

When 2016 didn't go the way that you expected

2016-12-30T23:00:00.000-08:00

At the beginning of 2016 you were full of hopes and dreams and you believed that you would finally accomplish your New Years Resolution.You know that same New Years Resolution that you've had for the last few years? Yes, that one. Well, like the years before you actually had hope that somehow you would accomplish it by the end of the year. However, as time went by you kept making excuses and putting it off and you even attempted to reach your goal a few times only to revert back to bad habits a few days later. Sigh! Well, now it's the last day of the year and you're still at square one. You're even slightly embarrassed to even mention your 2017 resolution because it was the same one you had in 2016. What can you do now?

Does any of the following apply to you:

I believe that I can accomplish my goal but I'm just too lazy to do what is necessary.
I think that my goal is too hard for me to accomplish
I don't think I'm good enough, smart enough or strong enough to accomplish my goal
I think that my goal is just a dream that will never happen
I don't have what it takes to accomplish my goal

If any of the above applies to you, realize that your number one problem is lack of self-motivation, followed by low self-efficacy.

In order for you to reach your goal you have to actually BELIEVE that you are capable of reaching it. When a person doesn't believe that they're capable of reaching a goal they don't put that much effort into accomplishing it. For example; if you don't believe that you can actually lose 50 pounds you're not going to put that much effort into losing weight or if you don't believe that you're smart enough to get a college degree you won't go back to school. Therefore, the first step in accomplishing a goal is to actually BELIEVE that you can accomplish it.

Don't confuse difficulty with impossibility. Accomplishing a hard goal is DIFFICULT but it's not IMPOSSIBLE.

Will it take hard work to accomplish it, yes
Will it take a long time to accomplish it, yes
Will you have to fight for it, yes
Will it be a challenge, yes
Will it be boring, yes
Will you have to do things that you don't feel like doing, yes
Is it impossible to accomplish, NO.

1. Can you lose 50 pounds, yes. Will it take hard work, yes. Will it take a long time to accomplish it, yes. Is it impossible, NO.

Will it be a challenge, yes
Will it be boring, yes
Will you have to do things that you don't feel like doing, yes
Is it impossible to accomplish, NO.

2. Can you get a college degree, yes, Will it take hard work, yes. Will it take a long time, yes. Is it impossible, NO.

Will it be a challenge, yes
Will it be boring, yes
Will you have to do things that you don't feel like doing, yes
Is it impossible to accomplish, NO.

3. Can you learn how to do something new, yes, Will it take hard work, yes, Will it take a long time, yes. Is it impossible NO.

Will it be a challenge, yes
Will it be boring, yes
Will you have to do things that you don't feel like doing, yes
Is it impossible to accomplish, NO.

Lack of patience is another reason that people don't reach their goal

How many times have you QUIT something because it was taking too long to accomplish or because it wasn't working fast enough for you?

You have to be realistic! The best goals in life take time to accomplish. You can't get a Doctorates degree in a few months and you can't lose 50 pounds in 2 weeks. Some things require hard work and patience to achieve. Learn how to be patient or you'll never achieve your goal. For more tips read my ebook '29 Steps To Getting Back on the Right Track'.

What to do when your ex is spreading lies and rumors about you

2016-12-13T09:01:00.000-08:00

It's Normal

Well, for starters I'd like to make it clear that it's perfectly normal for an ex to talk badly about you right after a breakup. Think about a time when someone broke up with you or you broke up with them and you talked badly about them or told people why you broke up with them. That's a normal part of getting over someone and most people know that people vent to their friends after a breakup. However, after a while most people move on; they look for someone else to date, focus on their own life and stop talking about their ex. The above is completely normal and most people eventually move on

It's not Normal

Now, let's talk about the person that doesn't move on, the bitter person that's out for revenge. This person is bitter about the past and they can't let go of it. Their mission is to destroy you by any means possible. For some reason they feel hurt or slighted and they want to hurt you. Basically, they went from being someone you were involved with, to being your ex to being your full blown enemy. Most people understand how relationships work and they know that exes aren't always honest about past relationships. Most people know that people aren't going to say nice things about their ex. Therefore, most rational people won't believe the lies or rumors that your ex is spreading about you. Also, most strangers don't care about the rumors unless it impacts them in some way. For example, if I tell you right now that my ex is a blank, you'd be curious but you'd only truly care if it impacted you in some way or you felt a connection to me on a more personal level. Basically, the only people that believe your ex or truly care about the rumors are the people in your ex's circle and people that dislike you. Anyone that immediately believes the rumors about you were already on the fence about you, already disliked you for some reason or are connected to your ex in some way. Excuse my french but frankly you shouldn't give a damn about the people that choose to believe what your ex says about you. Usually, they don't benefit you in any way or bring anything positive to your life, therefore their opinions should be irrelevant. As the old saying goes, if someone isn't paying your bills or putting food on your table then their opinion doesn't and shouldn't affect your life, your life will still go on with or without their 'approval'..

Their Friends and Family

Understand that people in your ex's life believe that your ex is a reliable source of information about you, after all they did date you. In your case, your ex isn't a reliable source of information but to your ex's circle he/she is considered a reliable source of information about you. Also, since his circle wants to support him they will remain loyal to him and be on his side. Just like your friends, family and circle are on your side. Looking at it that way allows you to see why his circle won't reason with you, agree with you on anything or believe your side of the story. They aren't on your side and never will be, they aren't your circle. That's his circle and they will believe what he says and nothing you do or say will convince them that he is the one that's wrong. Therefore, trying to prove yourself to them is a waste of time. The sooner you realize this the better off you'll be. Who cares what his circle thinks, they aren't important people in your life. Don't explain things to them or try to convince them or try to win them over because they will not betray him and side with you. What would your family do if your ex tried to convince them that you were this or that? They'd defend you no matter what and they wouldn't listen to your ex. Well, that's why you should EXPECT his circle to do the same for him. Expect that they'll defend him/her and that they won't listen to you. Don't waste your time or energy on them, you don't need them in your life.

Everyone that believes the lies has been tricked and lied to by someone that they trust (your ex). It sucks but it isn't your job to convince them that they've been tricked and lied to. Remember what I stated above, they will be loyal to your ex no matter what. As long as you and your circle know the truth that's all that matters.

Revenge

Realize that your ex is saying these things about you because they are seeking revenge and they want to bring you down. Therefore, the best thing you can do is show them that their attempt to bring you down won't work. How? Move on with your life and chase after your goals and dreams. Your ex will be disappointed that you are happy and moving on with your life. After all, that's the opposite of what they want you to do

What Strangers Think

Rational strangers will make up their own mind about you. When a rational person hears the rumors about you they will begin to watch you and see for themselves if it's true or not. Have you ever heard bad things about someone and you kept your distance at first, but after you got to know them you liked them? Well, when rational people hear rumors about you they will keep a slight distance at first, but after they observe your character for themselves they realize that the rumors aren't true. The truth always wins and rational people will be able to tell who's lying and who's telling the truth. Therefore, another thing you should do is put your best foot forward and show everyone your true character. That way they can decide for themselves if your ex is telling the truth about you or not. Think about Judges that listen to both parties, and decide who's lying and who's telling the truth. Most of the time the Judge spots the liar and decides the case on the truthful person's side. It's not hard for rational people to decipher the truth. Basically, show people who you are and rational people will decide for themselves what's true and untrue. Only irrational people, those that are in your ex's circle and your enemies will believe lies without doing their own research or observations.

Unapologetic

Realize that your ex is never going to admit that they've lied or that they're lying on you. They are never going to apologize or say that you're right? They won't have an epiphany or an aha moment or a moment of clarity or even grow out of their bitterness. Therefore, arguing back and forth with them is a waste of time. Most rational people argue and eventually reach a mutual agreement or agree to disagree and move on. However, your ex argues with you to unleash their bitterness and anger out on you, and to connect with you on some level. They don't argue with you to reach an agreement or to get closure so arguing with them is pointless. If you have someone like this in your life you'll soon realize that they constantly want to argue about the same topic(s). Don’t spend the rest of your life having the same pointless arguments with them and don't hold your breath hoping that they'll change or grow up.

Power trip

Why won't they just drop it and admit that they're wrong? Because they are your enemy and they want to bring you down. If they admit to being wrong or lying then that means that they won't get to bring you down or make you miserable. Also, it will make them look bad and they'd rather that you look bad instead of them . They have two choices, tell the truth and lose power over you or tell more lies to keep power over you. Power? Yes, your ex wants to maintain some sort of power over you and your life. Even though they aren't directly in your life they can indirectly be in it by spreading lies and rumors about you. Spreading falsities gives them power over your reputation and your emotions. They love doing things that cause trouble in your life. Controlling your life without even being in it makes them happy. Also, some ex's don't want anyone to like you because they want you to be alone and they think that spreading bad rumors about you will scare off potential partners.

Realize who you're dealing with

You're not dealing with a rational person that wants closure, you're dealing with an irrational liar that wants to keep the past alive and punish you.You're not dealing with someone that wants to compromise you're dealing with someone that wants to win, no matter what they have to do to win. Win what? Win at bringing you down and making you miserable. They don't want you to be successful or happy. Realize that it's pointless to try and have rational conversations with someone that's irrational and full of hatred towards you. Once you realize this you'll focus on your own life and you'll stop trying to reason with an unreasonable person. Every interaction with them will be negative because they are an enemy not a friend. Therefore, if you want to be happy it's best not to interact with them, they will only bring negativity into your life.

Summary of Tips

1. If you have an ex that hates you enough to try to damage you in this way the best thing to do is to decrease your interactions with them- The less interactions you have with them the less power they have.

2. Never engage in back and forth arguments with them, it's pointless, they are not arguing to squash things or compromise. This person will argue about the same topic for years, forever

3. Don't expect an apology or for them to admit that they're wrong. Realize that you're dealing with an irrational person that is out to damage you not help you.

4. Don't react to their negativity- they love when they make you miserable or emotional

5. Chase your goals and dreams- your ex doesn't want you to be successful at anything.

6. Focus on your circle because they're the people that matter and know the truth about you.

7. Don't worry about your ex's circle and what they think, they'll always believe them over you.

8. Focus on your present and the future- If your ex wants to remain in the past that's on them

9. Realize that strangers and rational people will observe you and decide if it's lies or the truth. The truth will win.

10.Don't try to get revenge, this person loves going back and forth with you, seeking revenge will only increase their lies and tactics against you. This person is a liar and will stop at nothing to defeat you. Unless you want to stoop to their level and become extremely negative then don't engage in back and forth revenge.

11.You have better things to do then to worry about what a bitter ex keeps saying about you. Tell everyone in your circle not to relay any of your ex's comments or messages to you. Your ex likes he say she say rumors, don't partake in those. If they're posting on Social Media you can usually report them for harassment. If it's at school, you can file a bully or harassment report against them. At work, you can speak to your supervisor or Human Resources. In some extreme cases you can get a restraining order against them.

12.Cut off their ability to contact you or connect with you. They love interacting with you, whether it's positively or negatively, that's why it's best to cut off their access to you.

13.If you have children with this person, it's best to get a third party involved that will do drop offs and it's best that you only have conversations with your ex about the children. Don't allow them to drag you into talking about your personal life or the past. Emails are best because it allows you to keep records of the conversation. Don't argue back and forth with them through text messages, don't stoop to their level. Afterall, that's what they want you to do.

14.Always remember that you're dealing with an irrational, unreasonable person that doesn't want their battle with you to end. Going back and forth with them allows them to connect with you and continue this battle of theirs. Don't engage.

15.Be happy and move on- Since they are spreading lies and rumors about you to ruin you, you should move on and be happy instead.

The best revenge you can get on your ex is to move on and show them that they can't takeaway your happiness.

When you really love someone you don't want to believe that they're a bad person so you convince yourself that they aren't bad.

2016-12-10T03:04:00.002-08:00

When you really love someone you don't want to believe that they're a bad person so you convince yourself that they aren't bad.

How do you convince yourself?

1.Well, you blame yourself for their actions. Blaming yourself makes you the bad guy instead of them.
2. You make excuses for what they've done. You blame their past, their problems or something else for their actions. Again, blaming something else TAKES the blame off of them. Your excuse is that their past made them do it , someone else made them do it, their ex made them do it, their problems made them do it or something else made them do it, therefore it isn't their fault. Now, they're the good guy and that something that made them do it is the problem.
3. Since they don't always treat you wrong you think that something you've done caused them to treat you wrong AND they might even blame you for their actions. Again, the blame isn't being placed on them. You or something else has taken the BLAME for their actions.

And since you've blamed yourself you feel that it's your JOB to fix them or the issue.

How are their ACTIONS your fault? How are their choices your fault? It isn't but you or them will convince you that it is your fault.

That's how you convince yourself that they aren't a bad person.

BLAME them for their actions. Blame them for their bad choices. When they show you their true colors don't try to paint a pretty picture with it.

The BIG difference between you and a Doctor

2016-12-09T15:09:00.001-08:00

How to add more skills to your list

If you can read you can learn and if you can learn you can learn how to do anything.

One day I asked myself this question "What's the difference between me and a Doctor" and the answer was that the Doctor went to Medical School and I didn't. A Doctor has more education than I have and they have a degree to prove it. Then I thought "Well if I go back to school and follow the same career path that they did then I can be a Doctor too" then there won't be a difference. So I decided to go back to school and get rid of the difference. I have a long road ahead of me but I won't stop until my name begins with Dr.

Again, if you can read you can learn and if you can learn you can learn how to do anything.

I apply the above quote to all parts of my life. I barely hire anyone to do anything for me because I know that I'm capable of learning how to do it myself. Family and friends ask me to fix their computer, including repairs that require me to take it apart. I can do my own oil change and basic car repairs. Recently, I remodeled my own bathroom, just by watching how to videos. My sister asked me who was going to install my new sink/vanity, bathroom lighting and bathroom fixtures and was in disbelief when I said that I was going to do it myself. Ladies I can braid your hair into some neat cornrows. Basically, I've learned how to do the above things and more.

The difference between you and the person that KNOWS how to do it is that they learned how to do it and you didn't. If you take away that difference you'll be on the same playing field as them.

Again, if you can read you can learn and if you can learn you can learn how to do anything.

You have a brain for a reason, use it.

You're smart enough to get it done, don't let anyone tell you that you're not.

If you want to be a Doctor, Lawyer, Engineer, Nurse, CNA or anything else that requires a Degree or license. GO back to school.

Before you hire someone to do something for you, learn how to do it yourself. It will save you money.

If you read this blog that means that you can read and that you can learn how to do anything,. :)

What skill can you learn that will better your life? Learn it, no excuses and no quitting. Get rid of the difference between you and the person that you aspire to be like.

7 Reasons Calls are better than Text

2016-12-08T22:00:00.001-08:00

Say YES to calls and NO to text

Text are great for when you can't talk or for quick conversations but when you're getting to know someone it's best to talk on the phone.

1. When someone reads your text they have to use a lot of imagination, they have to imagine your tone, your mood and your facial expression. However, when they are talking to you on the phone they can hear your tone and based on your tone they will also know what mood you are in.

2. Text lack intimacy. Would you rather hear the words I love you" or would you rather read a message that says "I love you?" Most people would rather hear those words because it's more intimate and meaningful when it's said instead of written. Well, phone calls allow people to connect on a more intimate level because you can hear each others voice and you can actually hear each other laugh instead of reading each others LOL'S.

3. Since you're on the phone with them waiting for a response they can't ignore your questions; they have to respond to you right away. They can't say that they didn't get your message.

4. Phone calls allow you to talk in complete sentences and paragraphs. Text are usually short messages back and forth and they don't allow you to fully explain yourself or go into a lot of detail. Nothing beats a great conversation that allows you to fully express your thoughts and opinions.

5. Nothing beats hearing your SOS's voice on the other end of the phone. Text doesn't allow you to hear their voice. If they're happy you want to hear how happy they sound right? Also, it's great when you actually hear them laugh at your silly jokes or witty remarks instead of them just texting LOL or sending you the infamous smiling emoticon.

6. Phone calls are better at revealing deceptive people. Some people like text because they are good at telling people what they want to hear and they have time to PLAN what they're going to say. Phone calls put them on the spot which leads them to slipping up and getting caught in their lies.

7. When you're just WORDS on their screen it's easy for them not to get close to you. Get closer to them by talking to them in person and over the phone.

Basically, save text for short, quick conversations and call them for long getting to know you conversations.

If you're shy the first phone conversation might be slightly awkward but after awhile you two will be taking on the phone for hours.

Good luck!

They won't keep the conversation going

2016-12-08T10:50:00.000-08:00

What to do when they won't keep the conversation going?

People that don't keep the conversation going are quite annoying and you should never put up with someone that does this.

First, I'll give you the reasons that people do this:

The busy bee. This person was busy when you messaged them but they decided to send you a message anyway forgetting to keep the conversation going. They sent you the message in a hurry not realizing that they didn't ask you anything back. However, this person usually realizes what they've done and makes up for it. This is for people that don't do this a lot.
The Not into You. This person isn't interested in getting to know you. So, they don't see the point in asking you questions. Ouch!
The inflated ego. This person is a Narc that is into themselves. They like being asked questions about themselves, after all they are a Narc that likes to be the center of attention. If you date this person the entire relationship or situationship will be centered around them.
The bored, nice person. They only responded to be nice or out of boredom but they aren't interested in getting to know you. That's why they respond SOMETIMES and not ALL THE TIME.
No manners. This person hasn't learned proper manners when it comes to communication.

No matter what the reason is you should handle it the same way and that is to SPEAK UP. Tell them in so many words that it's rude to not asks you questions back. If they keep doing it after you confront them then you need to stop messaging them. From now on if someone doesn't follow up your question with an answer and question of their own to keep the conversation going, let the conversation die. Afterall, it's supposed to be a conversation not an interview. If you're dating someone that does this then you really need to examine your situationship with them because that person is one-sided.

To sum things up, speak up and tell them to asks you questions back. Bring it to their attention and they'll start to asks you questions back. If they don't then you'll know that you need to stop messaging that person. Some people don't have the same manners that you have that's why you have to tell them how to treat you. Let them know that the people in their past might have put up with it but you're definitely not going to put up with it. The person with the inflated ego is used to people asking them questions like it's an interview and not a conversation. That's why you have to let them know that you're not like the rest and that conversations will be give and take. Also, the best way to communicate is in person or over the phone, text aren't a great way to get to know someone. I'll discuss that in my next post.

Are they into you or not, find out NOW by taking my short quiz. Fellas click here and Ladies click here to take the quiz

Ladies read 'Letting Go Of Mr. Wrong'
Fellas read ' How Men Can Avoid Getting Played'