Serious Sports News Network

Crowd wondering who that white dude next to Michael Jordan is

admin — Sat, 12 Sep 2009 04:04:32 +0000

SPRINGFIELD, MA—Attendees at the 2009 Naismith Memorial Basketball Hall of Fame induction ceremony on Friday, to a person, had no idea who the white guy holding up a jersey with the name “Stockton” is. Further confusion was summarily generated by the fact that none of the Hall’s inductees seemed perturbed by the fact that a [...]

“Experts” unable to clarify exactly what Vick would do with Pats

admin — Sun, 09 Aug 2009 14:06:27 +0000

FOXBORO, MA—As questions swirl about the future of disgraced quarterback Mike Vick, numerous so-called experts and analysts have speculated that Vick will sign with the Patriots, despite the team having an offense that relies heavily on its passing game and already having all-pro Tom Brady. “Vick needs an image makeover,” said Pardon the Interruption host Tony [...]

Ozzie Guillen throws perfect temper tantrum

admin — Fri, 24 Jul 2009 02:49:42 +0000

CHICAGO, IL—Players and clubhouse reporters could hardly have known Thursday afternoon when they filed into the White Sox locker room that they were about to witness baseball history. When asked by a reporter his opinion about division rival Minnesota Twins, White Sox manager Ozzie Guillen launched into a litany of curses, insults, and defamatory [...]

Kobe Bryant using ‘Send this story to a friend’ feature to inform Shaq of Lakers off-season moves

admin — Tue, 21 Jul 2009 16:29:43 +0000

LOS ANGELES, CA—It wasn’t so long ago that saying good-bye to a friend moving to the other side of the country meant saying good-bye forever. Thanks to the internet, however, keeping in touch couldn’t be easier—and one L.A. Laker in particular is reaping its benefits. “I just like keeping guys in the loop,” said an unusually [...]

Tim Lincecum skips post-game interviews to see “Harry Potter”

admin — Tue, 14 Jul 2009 16:29:54 +0000

ST. LOUIS, MO—Immediately following his removal after the 2nd inning during a rather disappointing performance in last night’s All-Star Game, Giants pitcher Tim Lincecum prematurely left Busch Stadium to watch a midnight showing of Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. “Yeah, I know that the NL lost again,” said Lincecum earlier this morning when reporters finally [...]