Sammy Adebiyi - Exploring the Greatness of God Through the Small Eyes of a Nigerian Pastor

Sometimes you just want to give up on people.

Sammy Adebiyi — Fri, 18 May 2012 10:10:26 +0000

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You don't make it easy do you?

I'm done with you. Done.

[That's what I told myself a month ago]

It's over. Good thing this relationship was only for a season right? I mean, we both knew from the start that we would inevitably part ways eventually.

I guess I'm just fast tracking the process. In my heart. I can't physically be away from you for a while. But emotionally? It's done. I'm done with you.

I give up on you.

But it's not for lack of trying because I've tried. To listen. Love. Pursue. Apologize. Encourage.

But nothing seems to work. You don't seem to get it and from my vantage point, you never will. So I give up.

Don't worry, I won't make a scene. In fact, you might never even know I gave up on you. I'll be cordial and nice but I'm done trying.

I'm done with you.

That's what I told myself four weeks ago regarding a "friend" because I thought I had nothing else to give.

I literally told myself... "I'm done with him" and truth be told, I actually meant it. I was really ready to be done.

Problem is, something weird happened. The moment I said those words, I realized I still had something to give.

Shucks! This decision was supposed to be lead me to a dead end but instead I ended up on the freeway.

I realized I couldn't give up on him. I don't mean to be cliche at all but it's just what happened. I realized I couldn't give up. Not because I didn't want to but because Jesus hasn't given up on me.

See that's where the strength came from. His grace over me is what gave me grace for him.

I'm not saying it's easy. Or even that he deserves it.

I'm just saying as long as I have a blank check of grace from Jesus, I'll always have enough in my account to spot people a few bucks.

All that to say, I can't be done with my 'friend' in spite of all he's done because Jesus is not done with me in spite of all I've done.

It doesn’t sound very spiritual but sometimes it’s just easier to emotionally check out on people (especially those permanent relationships that we can't just walk away from like family, co-workers, neighbors e.t.c).

Sometimes we just want to give up.

But we can’t.  

Because of the cross.

See, the argument for not giving up on others is not that they deserve it but that Jesus never gives up on you.

I know it’s hard but I promise you, the moment you fix your eyes on the cross, you’ll find strength to give a little more.

Have you ever wanted to give up on a relationship? Be honest. You can use a fake name if you want but tell of a time when you've been tempted to give up on someone or maybe you actually did.

EDIT: To clarify, not giving up on people in this context means we can always forgive and extend grace e.t.c. And although I think most of us give up too easily on relationships that stretch us, It does NOT mean we have to continually expose ourselves to toxic/abusive/unhealthy e.t.c relationships.

How do we know when it's time to actually walk away from a relationship?

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How the devil has been encouraging me to be a better Christian.

Sammy Adebiyi — Thu, 17 May 2012 10:10:18 +0000

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Hey you, please go there because it's guaranteed to ruin your life.

"Wanna drive a huge wedge between you and God? Here's how".

"Your kids and family will hate you forever if you just do this one thing".

I'll go out on a limb and guess that's not what your temptations sound like. The devil is not stupid. He's not a 2 year old trying to trip up an adult.

No, he's much more cunning and subtle. He's always got tricks up his sleeves and I think one big way he tries to rob us of God's grace is by encouraging us to:

"Be better Christians"

Yea, crazy huh? Can you believe it? He hinders us from fully experiencing God's grace by encouraging us to be a better Christians.

I know it sounds nuts but it's true. There are so many lies we consistently believed in the name of being a good Christian. Here are a few of mine.

1. Good Christians act like they are good at nothing.

Its extremely painful for me to say "I'm good at _____".

It's not because I don't know I'm good at certain things but rather because every time I want to acknowledge what God has given me, the enemy tells me...

  "Don't do it. Be a better Christian. Saying you're good at something is arrogant. Don't be prideful. No one likes a prideful person so keep acting like you're not good at anything"

How "Christian-ey' does that sound? Very. Problem is, it's not biblical.

The bible DOES acknowledge I am good at some things. Plus you see how this lie robs me right?

If he can get me to never acknowledge my gifts, then I'll consistently bury them and as long as I bury them, I'll never be a good steward of what God has given me.

2. Good Christians pretend God is not really for them.

Ever looked back at your life and thought 'Wow, Gods favor is definitely on me. He's with me. His hands are on everything I do. I can see his sovereign prints in every area of my life'?

Man I've been there. I've been in that place, but not for long because every time I'm just about to let God's grace hit me, I hear the small silent voice of the enemy..

'You can't really believe He's with you like that. You'll get arrogant. Be humble. Act like God is not really that for you. He's there but don't get too carried away or you'll take advantage of grace'

His strategy:

I think what the enemy does is, he takes something I naturally struggle with (in both cases pride) and uses it to prevent me from what God is doing in my life by framing lies with good intentions.

He fools me to think I'm actually doing a good thing by walking away from grace. He plays on my fear of pride and uses it to get me out of the game.

Does this happen to anyone else or am I just crazy? (i.e do you have a hard time embracing what God is doing in your life because it doesn't 'feel' like very Christian-y?)

Other ways the devil uses good intentions to rob us:

1. Marriage:

"You know you get too carried away with relationships. Don't enjoy dating him. You'll make it all about you. Be a good Christian and act like you don't really want this"

2. Community:

"A good Christian wouldn't call for help. Don't bother people with your problems. Strong Christians are mature enough to deal with things alone"

3. Dreaming big:

"You just want to be famous. Don't be selfish. Be a servant. Just focus on the small things. If you dream big, it's all about you"

4. Forgiveness:

"If you believe God really forgives you, you'll take things for granted and keep sinning"

5. Joy:

"There's too much at stake spiritually for you to have any fun or have that much joy. Don't you care about important things? Lost souls? Stop enjoying life. Be a good Christian and get to work"

I could go on and on but I hope you get the point. I hope this post exposes ways the enemy might be lying you into bondage.

I think the key is remembering that following Jesus is never ultimately about trying to be a better Christian by making better choices.

Following Jesus is about responding to God's abundant grace. If we're ever trying to be better Christians by under-mining or understating grace, then we're missing the point.

Avoiding Gods work of grace in order be a better Christian is like trying to get wet in the pouring rain while hiding under a huge canopy.

For me, the challenge today is believing that God by his grace has given me certain gifts AND embracing the truth that Jesus is with me and his hands are on everything I do.

I can't tell you how weird it feels to say that but by golly I want to believe it. How about you?

What do you have a hard time doing or believing because it feels like you're not being a good Christian?

Can you relate to anything on this post or any of the examples I posted above?

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Should wives be hot?

Sammy Adebiyi — Wed, 16 May 2012 10:10:51 +0000

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[Edit: This is a guest post by Nicole (more on her below). Ladies, I didn't write this, a woman did. Just wanted to clarify because some people were offended before reading because they thought it was from a dude]

Dear Wives,

First off, let me tell you that I love you. Each and every one of you. I consider you a sister, members of a not-so-exclusive club, wherein we act as helpers, friends, confidants, lovers, and partners to our husbands.

Wives rules. Period.

Now, that I have you buttered up (but please believe me, I meant each and every word) I'd like to discuss something with you. It is a phenomena that is sweeping the nation. It is ugly, dingy, sloppy, and disgraceful.

It is the unkempt wife phenomena and it ends today.

(Today's guest post is by Nicole Cottrell who is literally one of the best bloggers I know. I'm so honored to have her on today. Please don't be shy. Make her feel welcome and engage her in the comments section. But first fasten your seat-belts :) because as you can see, she doesn't pull any punches which is one of many reasons why her blog is incredible. Agree or disagree, let's hear from you.)

You see, I may be wrong, but I don't think that I am, yet it seems that a whole collection of women have come to believe that marriage is an opportunity to give up and just quit trying.

How do I know this?

Because I have seen them. I have seen these wives, strolling through Target, pushing a cart at the grocery store, out to lunch with friends.

They are women, who from afar, may appear to be zombies of some sort--disheveled, hair in a scrunchie (I mean, a scrunchie, really? It isn't 1992), sweat pants blowing in the wind.

But upon closer inspection, one realizes that these are not flesh eating creatures, so much as women who have fallen into a rut.

I'd like to help some of them out of that rut, if I can and here's why: Your husband deserves it and so do you.

Your husband deserves to come home each day (or see you come home each day, if you happen to work, as well) to the beautiful, lovely, admirable, and even sexy woman that he married.

Yet, this often isn't the case because for some strange reason, many women have fallen victim to the lie that marriage somehow ends your responsibility to remain attractive. Yes, I said responsibility. I know some people might not like that word, but it is fitting. I believe a wife has a duty to look hot. Yup, a duty for hotness.

Let's be honest too ladies, if our husbands hung out in sweats all day, rarely showered, and didn’t care if he had shaved or not, I doubt we would be too excited. Same goes for us.

If you got all dolled up before marriage and then stopped after marriage, well, my dear, that is false advertising.

Marriage is not an excuse to “get comfortable” or “let yourself go.” If ever there were a time to exert a little effort into looking good, it is in our marriages. In a culture racked with divorce, marriages are fragile enough.

We might forget it and hate to say it, but attraction is a key component to a healthy marriage and sex life.

Now, I'm not talking about being a size 12 or a size 2. I'm not talking about wearing scandalous clothing or push-ups bras. I'm also not suggesting that we have to strap on our aprons and heels, a la 1952, while prancing around the kitchen in full hair and make-up (how did they do it?).

But what I am suggesting, is that a little bit of effort goes a long way.

Here’s the thing too, I know life gets busy. I have a 5 year old, 3 year old, and an 8 month old. 'Nuff said. They leave me little time to do much of anything else besides take care of them. But I've made looking good for my man a priority.

Before my husband comes home, I sneak off to the bathroom, comb my hair, swipe on some lip gloss and mascara, and spritz some perfume. Easy peasy. Sure, my husband has seen me ragged, sweaty, grimy, and corpse-like. I have 3 kids, remember? But I try to make that the exception, not the rule.

I know my husband appreciates my effort, as well. I can see it on his face when he walks in the door. He smiles. I smile. And all is right in the world. No flesh eating monsters here, just a wife devoted to looking good for her man.

So, I say to you wives who have given up, thrown in the towel, called it a day: Join me!

Enter the land of the living, make an effort, and throw away those sweat pants and the t-shirt you won at your work conference. Join me. It's nice here. You'll love it here. You'll even leave looking prettier.

So let's hear it.

Are you or someone you know, suffering from the unkempt wife phenomena? How do you intend to pull yourself or your loved one out of it?

Do you think wives are required to look good for their husbands?

Also, If you are single, do you plan on keeping up appearances if you become married?"

Nicole Cottrell is trained in the fine art of button-pushing. She uses her skills daily on Modern Reject where she writes about the intersection of faith and culture as well as the unpopular stuff no one else likes to talk about. She loves her husband, three kiddos, strong coffee, and Him. Please connect with her on Facebook, Twitter and on her blog. Did I already mention how great her blog is?

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Sammy Adebiyi — Tue, 15 May 2012 10:15:13 +0000

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1. You'll sometimes feel like you're running out of time. Relax, breathe, you have time. This is not a race and you're not competing with your friends.

2. Before you say yes, know for sure that he'll pick Jesus over you in a heart beat.

3. God has a part for you in his story. Your marriage is not an end in itself. Marry a man on an adventure with Jesus.

4. Dating gives us massive blind spots. Please make sure you have friends who will tell you the truth about you, him and your relationship. If you're the only one who endorses the relationship, chances are you're missing something big.

5. Who you are is always more important than what you do. It doesn't matter if an angel appears to you and says "He is the one" if your relationship doesn't honor God.

6. Daddy loves you. Always. When you make mistakes (which you will) remember you can always come home to daddy. No matter what. Nothing you say to me will ever change how much I love you.

7. By the time you're old enough to date, I'll definitely own a gun.

8. Please talk to mom about boys. She's been there. She'll listen, laugh and cry with you. That's a special season. Please give her that gift.

9. Jesus loves you more than you'll ever know. His love never ever fails and it will never run out on you. The health of your relationship depends on how much you get this truth.

10. There will be plenty of days when he won't be able to give you what you want. That's not only normal, it's the point. Look to Jesus. Be honest. Be raw. Pour your desires to him.

11. Nothing you go through is unique to just you. Seek help. Seek wisdom. Seek counsel. Always.

12. I hope I'm great friends with him. I hope I can be dad to him. I hope he can call me if he ever needs anything. I also look forward to eating some wings and watching the game with him (unless he's an Ohio State fan but I know you wouldn't ever do that to your dad).

13. Marriage is the hardest adventure you'll ever go on. But it's absolutely incredible. The best decision I've ever made was marrying your mom but it was also a decision that I took very very carefully and prayerfully.

Be honest, one to thirteen, which one(s) did you need to hear?

Also, what would you like to emphasize or add to the list? What would you want to tell your kids (or future kids) about relationships?

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Mom.

Sammy Adebiyi — Mon, 14 May 2012 12:05:17 +0000

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"Rock".

That's my mom. She's a rock. I would NOT be where I am today or even close to knowing Jesus like I do without my mom.

She's the hardest worker I know. She loves Jesus with all of her heart and I couldn't have asked for a better mom.

No one has prayed harder or more for me than my mom.

Her faith is unrelenting and if you asked her about any random Psalm from the bible (just pick a number from 1-150 chapters), she can probably either recite you the whole chapter by memory or at least paraphrase most of it.

I hope I can someday love Jesus and know him half as much as Mummy does.

I love you mom.

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How to find God's will for your life in a whale.

Sammy Adebiyi — Fri, 11 May 2012 11:40:04 +0000

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You’re not in a whale.

I don’t know where you are on the journey of finding God’s will but unless right now, somewhere in the belly of a giant mammal, you somehow found a pocket of air where you could get internet connection to check my blog (why?) on your smart phone, you’re not in a whale.

Jonah on the other hand, was not so lucky.

If you’re not familiar with the story, in the Old Testament, God calls Jonah to go deliver a message to the people of Nineveh, to which he says no.

In fact, not only does he say no, but he decided to go in the exact opposite direction of where God wanted him to go. The bible says “But Jonah ran away from the Lord”.

In other words, Jonah was not trying to find God’s will. He was trying to lose it.

17 Now the Lord provided a huge fish to swallow Jonah, and Jonah was in the belly of the fish three days and three nights. (Jonah 1:17)

Long story short, Jonah finds himself praying to God in the belly of a whale. Finally after 3 days and 3 nights, the fish spits him out and God sends Jonah back to Nineveh and um, this time, he said obeyed. Ha!

Moral of the story:

If God redirected Jonah (who was intent on running away from God’s will) back into his plans for him, how much more do you think he’ll make sure that those who desire to run in obedience towards his plans will be in his will?

Look, I don’t have any more nuggets for you on how to ‘find’ God’s will but I do want to remind you that God is God and you’re NOT in a whale.

And even if you were, you can still take a deep breath because you’re not a lost cause.

God is big enough, strong enough and powerful enough to still redirect you in his story.

If God wants to use you, (which he does) age can’t stop him. Geographical restrictions can’t stop him. Lack of resources can’t stop him. Current circumstances can’t stop him and...

Ready for this? Not even your wrong turns along the way can stop him.

We don’t just trust God to help us make the right choices. We trust God that even when we make the wrong choices, he’s big enough to work it out for his glory.

In other words, you’re not doomed to missing God’s plans for your life because you turned right instead of left. It’s not ultimately up to you.

God is sovereign. (Please read this story if you want to get jacked up about God's sovereignty). Time is in his hands. He already sees the entirety of your life. Your marriage. Kids. Jobs. All the things we freak about, God already sees the end of.

Also, He knows each star by name and He holds the entire cosmos in the palm of his hands for crying out loud. Yea, I think you’ll be alright.

So, one more time, take a deep breathe. God’s will for your life is not a divine Rubik’s cube in your hands.
It’s the promise of a good Father to finish what he began in you no matter what.

The will of an unstoppable God who knows the number of hairs on your head.

Just think about that. Wow. The pressure is off folks. The pressure is off. THE PRESSURE IS OFF!!!

I need as many of you as possible (yes you too drive-by reader) to say this with me in the comments and fill in the blanks.

Jesus is unstoppable and the pressure is off regarding ________ (insert area of life where you currently feel pressure to make things happen or figure out God's will).

I know you might not believe it yet but if you leave a comment, I'll commit to saying a short prayer for you today to start finding rest in the Sovereignty of God.

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P:S- Thanks to everyone who has been sharing my posts (via Facebook/Twitter). It means the world to be supported. THANK YOU!

P:S:S- This is Part 5 of a blog series n finding God's will. Don't miss the next good stuff that's coming. Subscribe for email updates to the blog here . It takes less than 5 seconds, you won't get spam-ed and all the cool kids (over ~~600~~ 700 of them) are doing it.

Previously in the series: 1) How to find God's will for your life at Walmart. 2) How to find God's will for your life in one simple question. 3) How to find God's will for your life by listening to the who. 4) How to find God's will between Unibrow Bobby and Ponytail Tom (decision making).

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How to do a poor job in the name of Jesus.

How to find God's will between 'Unibrow Bobby' & 'Ponytail Tom' (decision making).

Sammy Adebiyi — Thu, 10 May 2012 12:41:14 +0000

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Buy house A or rent apartment B?

Med school (big money with a fancy title) or youth ministry (little money with a 30 year old Honda)?

Date 'Unibrow Bobby' or 'Ponytail Tom'?

I just want to know what God’s will is. I want to make the right decision.

No problem. I got your back. Just give me a second to ask my crystal ball, but just so you know, it’ll cost you $20. Small price to pay to dodge 40 miserable matrimonial years with 'Unibrow Bobby' wouldn’t you say?  

Just kidding. I don’t have a decision crystal ball or a special line to the angel in charge of sweetly whispering God’s will to our ears.

If you do then you should be writing this post because truth me told, I get just as confused as the next person with decision making but I have learned a few principles I think could be beneficial if you’re in the midst of an A vs B conundrum.

* I try NOT to make decisions based solely on...  

1. “Open and closed doors”   

(God if if you open the door, I’ll take that as a green light. If you slam it in my face then I know it’s a no)

We’ve all been there, done that. Problem is, God doesn’t always work that way. In fact sometimes God desires for us to walk through shut doors.   Paul getting ship wrecked was a closed door. Moses before the red sea was a closed door.

When Ashley and I decided to adopt Bebe, the door was dead bolted with laser beams and security guards protecting it (video here). It was virtually impossible and yet it was God’s will.

On the flip side, David had an ‘open door’ to kill his enemy while he was 'pooping' but he didn’t take it because it wasn’t God’s will.  

2. "Peace".

(“I feel a peace about it”)

  “And being in anguish, he prayed more earnestly, and his sweat was like drops of blood falling to the ground” (Luke 22:44)  

Jesus’ experience in the garden was hardly a peaceful moment, YET if something was ever God’s will, it was the cross.

Feeling of peace is not always a good indication of God's will.

Besides, I don’t know about anyone else but I’ve never NOT felt a ‘peace’ about something I really wanted. I’ve also never met any Christian who wasn’t feeling ‘a peace’ about the gal or guy they liked.  

3. "The ultimate trump card".

  ("God told ONLY me")

Man, I tell you, there are times when the Holy Spirit speaks to me and specifically guides me (not audibly but through impressions). I can’t explain it but I just somehow (supernaturally) know what I’m supposed to do. I recognize his voice.

Now having said that, truth is there are many other times when I've acted on what I think He’s speaking to me and I’ve been way way off.

This is why I never use “God told me” as an ultimate trump card on many decisions especially if its one I’m emotionally invested in.   

And lets be honest, ‘God told me‘ is sometimes a way to shut up anyone who disagrees with us. It’s a way to put a cross around the neck of a decision that most people see as stupid from 100 miles away.

* I try TO make decisions based on... 

1. Wise Counsel.

Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisors, they succeed. - (Proverbs 15:22)

  I haven’t made any major decisions (and a lot of small ones) in the last 5 years without first calling my father in law. I consistently ask my pastor about parenting. I called 5 people before we even decided to purchase our used van.

I’m committed to seeking godly counsel from older wiser people (not just my buddies who are sometimes as clueless as I am) and I can honestly say it has made all the difference in my decision making.   

Besides, if the wisest men to ever live says to seek counsel, I think that’s worth something.  

2. Asking the best question ever.

  Preached a sermon called “hot sauce mom and the best question ever”. Listen to it. If it doesn’t clarify the grey areas for you, I’ll send you a dollar in the mail. Seriously. It’s not called the best question ever for nothing.  

You can listen here.

3. The word of God.

  I didn’t know for sure if I should’ve gone on tour as a ‘Food for the hungry’ representative but the bible commands me to love orphans and take care of widows so we made the decision to go.

I didn't see a "sign" telling me that the summer initiative our young adult community is embarking on in a few weeks is God’s will but I do know God has commanded us to go into the world and preach the gospel so, we are going.   

You get the point. You might not find verses that say Marry "Unibrow Bobby" over "Tom" but based on what God has said to us in his word, you can probably rule out Unibrow guy since He's not a Christian.

The truth is, most of us are looking for God to speak to us when we are doing nothing about what He has already said to us in his word.

So what do you think? What stood out to you on the lists?
What would you emphasize or add to the lists above?

__________________________________________________________________________

P:S- Thanks to everyone who has been sharing my posts (via Facebook/Twitter). It means the world to be supported. THANK YOU!

P:S:S- This is Part 4 of a blog series in finding God's will. Don't miss the next installments. Subscribe to the blog here. It takes less than 5 seconds and all the cool kids (over ~~600~~ 700 of them) are doing it.

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How to find God's will for your life by listening to 'the who'.

Sammy Adebiyi — Wed, 09 May 2012 10:10:21 +0000

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God’s will is always a who before it's ever a what.

Or to put it a different way, God cares WAY, WAY more about who you are than what you do.

We on the other hand care way more about ‘what’ we do than ‘who’ we are, which is why I think God’s will seems so confusing to us.

It's sort of like when I showed up for a football game a week after I came to the US from Nigeria.

"Wait, why are they wearing helmets and pads? And why is the goal post upside down with no nets?"

Same name but two completely different sports. You can imagine my shock when I realized that football was NOT football.  

I don't know about you but 99% of the time when I think of Gods will, I think of a ‘what’, ‘where’ or ‘when’. Hardly ever a ‘who’.

‘What’ does he want me to do? ‘Where’ do you want me to go? ‘When’ will you do that?

God on the other hand is playing a completely different ‘sport’. When God thinks of us fulfilling his will for our lives, he doesn't see what we've done but ‘who’ we've become.

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who[i] have been called according to his purpose. For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. (Romans 8:28-29)

I know we all love verse 28 but it’s in context of 29. Paul is saying God is working towards an ‘end’... and that end is actually someone NOT something.

In other words, if you drive to the end of Gods plan for you, you won't dead-end into a job or place. You will rather find a person named Jesus.

Jesus... looking like him, acting like him, loving like him... is God’s will for you.

Paul is so convinced of the who before the what that he makes this outrageous statement...

“...if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.” (1 Corinthians 13:1-3) 

HOLY COW.

Do you see what Paul just said?

"Hey guy who just gave everything you own away to the poor because of Jesus. Hey girl who just allowed herself to be martyred. It doesn’t matter “what” you did if you miss the “who” (in this context “who” is a loving person).

How huge is this? It changes everything.

It means when it comes to God's will, it's NEVER ok to sacrifice the ‘who’ in pursuit of the ‘what’.
It means it doesn't matter if we get the 'what' right if we are completely missing the ‘who’.

* I know an angel told you God wants you to buy that house but it doesn’t matter If you are forging numbers.
 
* If you are sleeping with your fiance or girlfriend or touching each other inappropriately, it doesn't matter if Jesus himself told you “he is the one”.

* If you’re single and live a promiscuous lifestyle, your burden is NOT ‘when’ or ‘where’ you’ll find your spouse.

* If you’re not a good student, do you really think sweating picking the ‘right’ major matters?

'What' we do for Jesus doesn't matter if it compromises 'who' we are in Jesus.

Although I gave some extreme examples, I think this principle applies in every day life.

At work, at home. In a cubicle. At our factory. With our kids. Around our families. God is first asking, are you becoming more like Jesus?

I'm not saying God doesn't care ‘what’ we do because he does. I'm just saying he cares first and foremost about the who we are.

So, instead of trying to figure out ‘the what’ first, what if we started trying to figure out ‘the who’ first?

What if the burden in finding God’s will was not so much about wondering if we're doing the right thing but rather if we are being the right person?

We do that and all of a sudden God’s will is not so complicated. In fact it's as plain as day because most of the time when we don’t know what He wants us to do, we know who He wants us to be.

I know you’re anxious to know how to choose between A, B or C (more on that later in the series) but again until we get in our minds that the end goal for God’s plan is being more like Jesus, it won’t matter what decisions we make.

But on the flip side, the more we allow the ‘who’ to take shape, the more the ‘what’ falls into place.

Does anyone else find that listening to the who provides more clarity than listening to the what?

Forget the 'what' for a second, tell me, what are some ways God might be wanting to work on 'who' you are? (love? patience? contentment? generosity? purity? integrity? courage? intimacy with him? better work ethic? discipline?)

__________________________________________________________________________

P:S- This is Part 2 of a blog series in finding God's will. Don't miss the next 5 installments. Subscribe to the blog here. It takes less than 5 seconds and all the cool kids (over ~~600~~ 700 of them) are doing it.

Previously in the series: 1) How to find God's will for your life at Walmart. 2) How to find God's will for your life in one simple question.

The 5th spiritual law: Now you die.

Why I hope all your good dreams (eventually) become garbage.

Why I hope you always say no to good things.

Why I'm leaving my wife and 2 week old baby.

Why Jesus asked us to hate our parents and what parents should do about it.

How to find God's will for your life in one simple question.

Sammy Adebiyi — Tue, 08 May 2012 10:17:01 +0000

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Can I set you free from the endless maze of trying to figure out God’s will in one sentence?

God's will is for you to walk in faith.

Whoa! did you get that? I know it wasn't that profound but I promise it will change your life if you believe it. Let me say it again in a different way.

Following Jesus REQUIRES walking down a path of faith.

Man, I tell you, when it comes to 'finding' God’s will, I honestly don't know if anything has given me more clarity as much as that truth. Here's how Paul put it:

 For without faith, it is impossible to please God. (Hebrews 11:6)

We walk by faith and not by sight. (2 Corinthians 5:7)

How freeing is that? We walk by faith and NOT by sight.

i.e the Christian walk is not about what you know and what you can see rather It's about trusting God (faith) because you don't know and can't see.

To put it plainly, that verse means there are many things you’re NOT supposed to know for sure so take a deep breath.

I know you’re probably hoping for an angel visit or a neon sign but what if God’s will for _____ is that you won't know 100% about ______?

Not because he wants to confuse you but because he wants you to trust him.

You see, I think the reason many of us have problems with God’s will is because we think “GPS system”.

Turn right in 2 miles. Marry her. Move to Cali by train in 13 days. Buy white house with grey roof. Pick 3rd major on 4th page of college syllabus.

Yea, I wish it was that easy too but it's not. The Holy Spirit is not a divine GPS system.

He’s more like dad looking up at a scared kid on the diving board asking you to jump in the deep end.

"I know it's scary. I know you don't know how deep, high or cold it is but you should jump anyway because I am WITH you".

That's more what Jesus sounds like. Yes God might not have told you to do ____ instead of ____ but he is telling you something.

Trust me.

Trust me.

Want to know my will regarding _______? Trust me. That's my will. Walk by faith.

God has used me in some incredible ways but I can honestly say I've NEVER been 100% sure about any of them. Yes that includes my marriage, my job and Bebe's adoption. I have felt a 'nudge' but it was far from a guarantee.

Ever wonder why you won’t see one example of an Old Testament saint in Hebrews 11 that knew 100% what God wanted them to do?

Hebrews 11 is not a hall of “I-knew-for-sure-what-God-wanted-me-to-do”. No, quite the contrary. Hebrews 11 is a hall of "I-trusted-God-and-went-for-it-even-though-I-wasn't-sure".

Do you see how freeing that is?

I mean, maybe it's just me but if Moses didn't always know God’s will 100% then I can sleep at night when I don't know God’s will 100% because that's the point.

But then when I wake up in the morning, I have to go do something because I'm called to WALK in faith.

Christians aren't called to wait till we know how everything will play out. Christians are called to go like we know, even though we don't know.

Here's how my former pastor put it:

Faith is spelled R.I.S.K.

Or to put it differently, faith is not spelled... S.I.T.O.N.T.H.E.C.O.U.C.H.A.N.D.D.O.N.O.T.H.I.N.G.U.N.T.I.L.Y.O.U.A.R.E.S.U.R.E

See, I don’t think we are stuck because we need to know more but rather because we are afraid. We don't want to risk or fail so we ask God for his will, which is often code for an assurance that we won't fail.

“Finding” God’s will sounds super spiritual until we find out that God’s will is for us to risk, try, fail and trust. God's will is that you won't know for sure before you go.

Please don't misunderstand me. I'm not asking you to be stupid. Young guy, don't ask her to marry you after 3 dates because Sammy said we should take risks.

Faith isn't a trump card for stupid decisions so please pee in a cup and don't pull a hot sauce mom.

Also, to be fair, there are seasons where God makes us wait. I don't think this contradicts what I'm saying because when we wait, we trust.

Christians aren't called to wait till we know for sure. We wait because we trust.

So here's what I propose. Rather than constantly asking what God’s specific will for _____ is, what if we started asking...

How does God want me to trust him with ______?.

You do that, you ask that one question and you will have clarity in the unknown. I promise.

We will talk more 'practically' tomorrow, but for now, we have to start by knowing we aren't supposed to know lest we keep asking all the wrong questions.

Great dialogue yesterday. Please keep it going...

Does anyone else find freedom in knowing that we're not supposed to always know for sure?
Also, what's something you need to trust God for instead of trying to figure out exactly how its going to play out?

Previously in the series: How to find God's will for your life at Walmart

Wait.

Waiting.

Why its okay if you don't see spiritual growth in your life.

Why the world needs cocky Christians.

Why we must all learn to pee in cups.

How to find God's will for your life at Walmart.

Sammy Adebiyi — Mon, 07 May 2012 03:35:18 +0000

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Last week, my wife Ashley sent me to Walmart with this list:

1. Mini marshmallows (baking aisle).
2. Coffee creamer (hazelnut- in refrigerator section by milk).
3. Decaf Coffee (doesn't matter what brand...just get the cheapest kind, and smallest box this is in the aisle with the tea).

Don’t worry, my wife doesn’t think I’m dumb :). She just gave me a list like this because I call her at least 22 times every single time I go to Walmart.

Call 1 @12:01: Hey babe, just wondering where the bread aisle is.
Call 2 @12:02: Hey babe, white or wheat?
Call 3 @12:08: Hey, so you want me to get the Walmart wheat bread or the nice one?
Call 4 @12:12: Ashley, It says 10 for 10. Does that mean I have to buy 10 loaves to get the discount?
Call 5 @12:15: Hey babe, me again. Sorry. Did you say wheat or white?

See now why she started giving me a list like the one above? Specificity and simplicity is the name of the game. Don't you wish you could say the same about God’s will?

Isn’t it frustrating that simplicity and specificity would be the last words we use to describe God’s “super complicated” will?

It’s like if God’s will were food items at a grocery store, the list he gave us would look something like this...

1. Brown. Food section. While supplies last.
2. Small. Chunky. Only one left in the store.
3. 10 strangers have 10 different hints that collectively gives you another hint for how to solve the world's greatest 'this is what you're supposed to buy' riddle that is hidden in a cereal box somewhere in the the non-food section of one of 100 Walmart in North America.

So maybe that's a slight exaggeration but have you listened to some of our dialogue about figuring out God’s will?

God, should we move there or stay here? Yes? No? Maybe? Now? Next year? Rent? buy? lease for sale? short sale? listing agent? 

Should I date her? Is he the one? Oh what about him? Or him? Wait.. do you even want me to get married?

Have another kid? Adopt? Foster? Home school? Private school?

Major in Pharmacy? Education? Spanish? HR but go into ministry? Community college or or exchange program? New job? Stay put? Seminary? Doctorate? Fashion school? Be faithful or pursue dream? 

Phew. Exhausting. We've all been there. Figuring out God’s will can feel like trying to find a needle in a hay stack.

But what if God's will is NOT as complicated as we make it?

What if finding God’s will is as simple and specific as finding an item on my wife's list?

Decaf Coffee (doesn't matter what brand...just get the cheapest kind, and smallest box next to the tea in aisle 9 row 3)

My hope at the end of this week is for you to know God's will in every area of your life.

That’s a big check to write but I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised.  

This week. 5 posts. 5 topics on finding God's will.

But I need your help to get started. Please tell me...

In what area of life would you most like to know God's will for your life?
Also, have you ever had a hard time figuring out God's will?

P:S- Don't miss the next 5 installments in this series. Subscribe to the blog here. It takes less than 5 seconds, It's the coolest and all the cool kids (over 600 of them) are doing it.

The craziest thing I've ever heard about Gods love.

The gospel according to washing toilet seats.

Them Hoarders, me, you and 2500 free roaming rats.

Ugly People.

What God wants the most from us.

20 things you'll never hear at your funeral.

Sammy Adebiyi — Thu, 03 May 2012 11:30:40 +0000

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1. You know we really wish she gave less, risked less and served less.

2. Mummy and Daddy had a huge impact on my life because they made so much money. (greatest hits)

3. He had by far the best house and the newest nicest car in the neighborhood.

4. Nobody in the world has ever gone through what He went through.

5. You know what's amazing about this guy? He lived life to the fullest and he did it all on his own. He didn't even need anyone. (friendship)

6. She attempted and accomplished so many great things in her life but she never failed once. (fail)

7. My husband was so amazing because he was always right. I never heard him say sorry because He never had to say sorry. (sorry)

8. I wish dad would said he was proud of me less and I never understood why mom wanted to spend so much time with me. (disgraceful dad)

9. She changed the world by pointing out what was wrong with what others were doing. She never played on the team but she was a master critic of the game from the bleachers and the world is a better place for it. (shut up or play)

10. None of us would be here if He hadn't taken life too seriously. We are indebted to the fact that he never laughed, played or had any significant fun. (laugh)

11. It's incredible how she managed to do great things for God without having to first be faithful in the small insignificant things. (waiting)

12. My dad was the best in the world because he always made sure we lived way above our income.

13. She was so skinny and wore a size __. He was so ripped! (him)

14. He tried to be the best in the world at what he did and succeeded. There was none better.

15. She stood for many things and was beloved by everyone. (haters)

16. He was always on fire for God. No deserts, doubts or waiting periods. Just mountain tops. (doubt)

17. Daddy was my hero because I never saw him cry or show weakness . (dudes)

18. (S)he was so happy and lived a satisfying life because (s)he was GREAT in bed and experienced every sexual pleasure possible. (sex)

19. This is the part of the funeral where we judge his or her life based on how they faired compared to those around them. (envy)

20. He had no hope. When we look at his or her life, one thing we can all agree on is, it was so bad, there literally was NO hope left.

One to twenty, which one(s) did you need to hear?

Also, what would you like to emphasize or add to the list?

7 things you didn't know about Easter (3/7): There was a Zombie Invasion.

Just a dude talking to dudes about love.

Just a kid talking to you about God and life.

Orange bags, dog business and broccoli.

Pastors, Beer and Jesus.

*I think I'm better than Jesus.

Sammy Adebiyi — Wed, 02 May 2012 10:45:24 +0000

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‘HE HATE ME'

In spring of 2001, XFL player Rod Smith adopted the name ‘He hate me’ on the back of his football jersey. I thought it was absolutely hilarious.

But I could never do it.

To be frank, the thought of someone hating me makes me want to crawl up in a cave and suck my thumb. I hate, repeat, HATE being hated.

On a ‘how do you respond to being hated or criticized’ scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being brush it off easily and 10 being I go nuts, I’d rank a 15...

I absolutely cannot stand the thought of being hated, disliked, criticized or disagreed with by anyone.

Even strangers.

I’d actually rather be ignored than hated.

To make matters worse... Jesus says I can’t truly follow him without being hated.

"You will be hated by everyone because of me, but the one who stands firm to the end will be saved" -Matthew 10:22

“If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first" -John 15:18

As I read that, I’m confronted with a very sobering thought:

I think I’m better than Jesus.

I actually think I’m better than Jesus...
And so do you if you respond to criticism and hatred like I do.

You know how i know?

Because we think we can pull off what Jesus didn’t pull off. I think I can do what Jesus couldn’t do.

I think I can get everyone to like me.
If i try hard enough, I think -unlike Jesus- I can preach truth filled sermons that won’t offend anyone.
I think I can draw the line in the sand AND be beloved by opposing camps.
I think I can go out on a blaze of applause without any boo's.
I think I can preach a gospel that's not offensive.

I want to do what Jesus didn’t accomplish. Or Paul. Or David. Or Moses. Or Daniel. Or Abraham. Or Esther. Or every spiritual great in the bible.

I want everyone to like me.

I’m an arrogant fool. Or an insecure fool.
Or both.

Lord, allow me to find my identity in you. I want to please you not men. Help me view offenses as an opportunity to gain more of you Jesus. Allow me to grow up. Help me keep my eyes on you.

Be honest, on a scale of 1-10, how much do you hate being hated, criticized or disliked? (i.e raise your hand if you're a people pleaser).

Also, how do you handle or respond to criticisms and being disliked?

*A repost from the archives.

Is it time we finally label ‘Moses and the red sea’ a fairy tale?

Is Masturbation sin?

Why the world needs more Christians who put themselves first.

Why we must all learn to pee in cups.

Your dream is NOT dead.

*B.F.F'S PART 1 [MY BEST FRIEND CAN BEAT UP YOUR BEST FRIEND]

Sammy Adebiyi — Tue, 01 May 2012 12:41:41 +0000

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Meet John. Best Friend Forever. Yes that is really him in the picture.

[Click the image, enlarge it, be in awe of his 'temple'. But ladies, don't look too close or you might stumble].

John was a former body-builder. He doesn’t quite look like that anymore but don’t be fooled, he’s still packing, so if John and I ever got in an altercation with you and your best friend, you’d better run.

J/K. John would never beat you up, not because he couldn’t but because he’s the most loving person I know. Seriously, Its not even a contest.

Don’t get me wrong, he’s not perfect. He’s got hair growing in all the wrong places and I still don’t know how he got Christine to marry him because he’s got the worst ‘game’ of anyone I know.

But what he lacks in ‘game’, he more than makes up for in heart.

I promise I’m not exaggerating when I say that John has loved me in a way that has far exceeded anything I’ve ever known or hoped for in a friend.

He not only walked with me in the ‘desert’ but he was the first guy I ever told things I never thought I could tell anyone. I remember calling John at 2 am, balling my eyes out wanting life to end. He didn’t have all the answers but he always answered the phone.

One time a girl broke up with me and John drove 4 hours to take me home.

Other than my wife, no one else has said “I love you” to me and meant it as much as John.

I could write a whole book of inside jokes that only John and I would find funny.

I’m also pretty sure there’s nothing I can tell John that would ever change how he feels about me.

And oh, remember that scene from 'Lord Of The Ring' where Sam was drowning and Frodo saved him?
Yea, that happened to us. I was drowning in a lake and John saved me. Literally. I could go on and on.

Point is, I wouldn’t be anywhere close to where I am today if God didn’t send me a friend like John.

Someone really smart once said...

‘If you want to go fast in life, go alone. If you want to go far, go with a friend’.

In other words, everyone needs a ‘John’.

Doesn’t matter if you are single, married, 18 or 72 years old. You need a ‘John’ to be all God wants you to be. They don’t need to have 64 pack abs like 'my John', they just need to truly know you and love you unconditionally.

"A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother." - Proverbs 18:24

Do you have a ‘John’ in your life? If so, tell us about him/her? What makes them a BFF?
If not, what's holding u back? what’s been your biggest challenge to having a BFF?

* A repost from the archives.

Missionaries to Burger King.

My circumcision can beat up your circumcision.

Old people are overrated and stupid friends are gold.

One thing I hate about being a dad.

Orange bags, dog business and broccoli.

When complaining is the most spiritual thing you can do.

Sammy Adebiyi — Mon, 30 Apr 2012 10:18:50 +0000

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The other day I complained and it was the best thing that's happened to me in a while.

Christians, let me guess, that last sentence probably sent you in a tizzy. Simmer down (now). Relax. I know why you're bothered by what I said.

"Do everything without complaining or arguing..." (Philippians 2:14)

That's what you were thinking wasn't it? Don't freak out. Reading minds is my spiritual gift.

J/K. The only reason I know that is because that verse hunts me like a little Chihuahua that won't stop nipping at your heels.

Do everything without complaining? Really? Don't get me wrong, it's great advice. Problem is I want to complain. SO. BAD.

But I can't because of this verse. And because some of the things I want to complain about are good things (blessings, dreams and answers to prayers). In fact, some of you would give anything to inherit the object of my complaints.

You: Surely you're not about to complain about THAT are you?
Me: No I'm not. And don't call em surely.

But what now? I'm not "allowed" to complain so what now?

I suck it up that's what. I act tough. I put on a smile. That's how I respond....

UNTIL LAST WEEK, sitting back stage, a few minutes before i was about to preach. I guess I just couldn't take it anymore. I was too tired, so, I did it. I committed the cardinal sin (slight dramatization).

I complained to God.

I told him I was tired and worn out. In fact I'm pretty sure I used the words "I quit". Also something about "having nothing left" and "giving up".

In summary, I said, God I don’t want to do this but I have to so if anything is going to happen, it's going to have to be you because I'm done.

And boom, there it was. In that moment, something crazy happened. Actually, what was amazing was what did NOT happen.

God did NOT slap me over the back of the head with a divine whip. I complained to God and He was NOT mad at me. Rather he wrapped his arms around me and said I know.

I honestly think (as crazy as it sounds) complaining was the most spiritual thing I could do in that moment because it connected me to Jesus in a way I desperately needed.

See, my problem was not that the bible commanded me not to complain (which it does), my problem was I confused complaining with admitting weakness.

Because we're not supposed to complain, I assumed that meant I'm supposed to be superman. I'm supposed to just man up and power through. Problem is...

if we are never weak, how can He be our strength?
If we are never down and out, how can we experience a savior?
If we are never tired, how can we find rest in Jesus?
If we never want to quit, how will we know His grace is enough?

To be clear, if complaining means whining and throwing a pity party just to gain attention then please don't complain because complaining as an end in itself is selfish (what Paul was saying in above verse).

But if complaining means admitting weakness so you can find strength, If it means admitting you're at the end of your rope and need a savior, then please go ahead and complain to God (what David did so many times in the Psalms).

Don't just go through the prayer motions. Thank him but also vent. Pour your heart out to him. It just might be the best thing you've done in a while.

It might feel weird especially if what is wearing you down is a good thing you asked for (your kids, job, home) but don't let that stop you. Tell him you can't change another diaper. Write another paper or work another 8 hour day. Be weak so that He can be strong.

And if it makes it an easier, God already knows what you are thinking and feeling.

Anyone else feeling tired? weak? worn out? Anyone else need to complain about some good things in life? Or am I crazy?

Dear Christian, hang on a sec, I'm sleeping. -Jesus

Dear Christian, I don't hate u cuz of Jesus. I hate u cause you're a jerk ~Non-Christian

Dear Christian, Its okay to be a scared wuss.

Dear Christian, you are homophobic, irrelevant and judgmental. ~Non-Christian

How much does God weigh?

(Re) Dear Reader, You Are Not That Special -God.

Sammy Adebiyi — Fri, 27 Apr 2012 10:15:16 +0000

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Life is like a bully.

She’ll push you around, de-pants you in public, slap you in the back of the head, give you the mother of all wedgies, punch you in the nose, eat your lunch, mess up your hair, steal your pocket money, shoot spit balls at you, zap you with the biggest zit on your nose, whip... okay, you get the point.

Life is mean and sometimes you just want to give up.

But it’s okay cause God says you’re not that special. And neither am I...

We are NOT that special and that's a great thing. Before you cyber-stone me to death, let me explain.

I don’t know about you but I usually celebrate tough times in my life by throwing a major pity party for myself.

First I send ‘my life sucks more than yours’ invitation cards to everyone and their mom.
Then I bake a giant ‘woe is me’ cake and hang some ‘nobody ever understands me’ balloons.
I even register for gifts at the ‘if God is so good, why did he let this happen to me’ department store.

Oh, did I mention its a costume party? Who am I you ask? I’m the ‘fairness’ police.
Of course.

And yes I will give a speech. In fact I’ll give many speeches so please fast before coming cause I’m about to serve you a big fat plate of life’s unfairness. Gonna be a feast baby.

Right Jesus?
No.
Why?
‘Cause you’re not that special Sammy’
You’re not.

I know you feel forsaken. You feel like I’ve let you down. I know you are afraid I will fail you.

But please look at my resume...

I’ve been working in peoples lives all through history and I haven’t ever let anyone down.
EVER.

Do you really think you’re so special you’ll be the first?

You really think when its all said and done, the final word will be...

‘God had a good run for thousands and thousands of years until Sammy’?

‘Shoot! Jesus was doing so good too, on a massive roll. He was having the greatest undefeated running streak of all time... until he met Sammy’s problems’.

No.

That won’t be the final word.

Your problem isn’t that grave.
You’re not that special.

You won’t be the one exception to my faithfulness. You won’t be the bleep in my story. You won’t be a blemish in my nature. I AM good. K?

Now clean up after your pity party. Then come to my party.
Its bigger. Larger. Greater.
History is here. The beginning and the end are here. Time is here.
And so are millions of people who have rested in my faithfulness without fail.

I’m not that special.

Those 4 words held me afloat during the hardest season of my life because right when I wanted to give up on God, I looked at history and reminded myself that I wasn’t special enough to be the first person with a problem so impossible for God to engage.

Psalm 9:10:
'Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek you except for Sammy Adebiyi'

No. it doesn’t say that.

'Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek you' [Period]

In what area of your life do you currently need to remember that you're not that special? [financial...relational...health...academic...marital... etc]

Take a deep breath. God is great and you or your situation are not that special to stump him.

How do you first respond when life gets hard? Do you ever throw a pity party like I do?

Also, how has God proven faithful in your life in tough/impossible/hopeless situations?

Where is God when I'm suffering?

Why having a pet rock is more biblical than you think

Why I hope all your good dreams (eventually) become garbage.

Why I hope you always say no to good things.

Why it matters to you that Jesus battled with sexual temptation Part 1.

Silently Single.

Sammy Adebiyi — Thu, 26 Apr 2012 10:15:59 +0000

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When I started writing professionally, I made a decision. I was not going to write about being single.

Those people who write about being single are annoying.

They are either super happy with being single [and make you feel guilty for the days that you don’t feel equally super happy] or they complain about being single [and that always makes me roll my eyes in annoyance].

I didn’t want to be annoying.

But on a deeper level, I didn’t want to write about something that was so. stinking. personal.

Because when you desire to be married, pray and believe that God hears you, and then buzz by your 31st birthday still single, that junk is personal.

It’s not just about being alone at the dinner table or in the bed. It is about unanswered prayers, and how to face a God who can do something about those unanswered prayers, but doesn’t. I didn’t want to write about that. It gets deep and intimate and all up in my business.

So I avoided it. For years.

Until last fall. I don’t know what happened, but everything changed [except my relationship status… ahem]. It’s like in a moment, this one day sitting in my flat in Edinburgh, Scotland, I knew it was time to talk about it.

I couldn’t be silently single anymore.

I am living a life I never planned. I am, honestly, shocked that I am about to be 32 and have no husband and no children.

But there is this thing in me, deep down in my knower, that is a fireball of hope.

Not necessarily hope in the “I am FOR SURE getting married someday” way, but hope in the “God knows what He is doing” kind of way.

Sure, I could wait until I was married with 2.5 kids and tell all the Christian singles to hang it there because God has an amazing plan for your life. And it would be true.

But I think there is something really powerful about being smack in the middle of the unwanted season and being able to look you right in the eyeball [which I would if I could] and say,

You are going to survive this, friend.

God has not forgotten you.

Your life and your desires are important to Him.

It’s not my job to be the poster child of Single Christian Girls.

I don’t know everything there is to know about how to handle this season – friendships with boys, sex, boundaries, roles, career pursuits, all of that stuff. I am not here to claim ultimate wisdom on how to do this.

[And seriously, those poster people are the annoying ones I already told you about. I really don’t want to be annoying.]

I just want to tell you, from one in the trenches of this season of singleness to another, that we are gonna make it just fine.

God hears us when we pray. God knows our hearts better than we do. There are hard days in this and there are easy days. But there are never days when you have been abandoned.

And it’s good that we talk about it.

So I have. And I am. And I will. I promise.

And here we are. Another 500 words about being single and I didn’t totally annoy myself. Huzzah!

No matter what your marital status is, we have all dealt with unanswered prayers. How do you reconcile that personally?"

. . . . .

For you singles out there, what do you think is the hardest thing about being a Christian and being single? What do you think is the best thing about being single right now for you?

Are you living silently single?

Is there someone in your life that could benefit from honest conversations with you about your singleness?

What do you wish single Christian writers were willing to write about?

. . . . .

Annie Downs is an author and speaker based in Nashville, Tennessee. You can read more of her thoughts on singleness over at (in)courage.me. On her own blog, she’ll stick with waxing poetic about haircuts, coffee shops in Nashville, and other equally important topics.

four, five, SEX part 1: Boobs.

four, five, SEX part 2: Pre-Rapture Sex.

Pimp my trashcan: When Jesus doesn't care if you cuss or tithe

When God picks the fat kid first.

Why having a pet rock is more biblical than you think

Jesus changes hearts.

Sammy Adebiyi — Wed, 25 Apr 2012 12:48:20 +0000

Off

In the words of one of the greatest philosophers of our generation...

'Never say Never'. -Justin Bieber.

13 years ago I said I would never become a pastor.

No scratch that. I screamed I would never be a pastor. Then I slammed the door on my mom. Then I cried for hours. Maybe I even cussed.

Look Jesus, I'm cussing. See, I can't be a pastor.

Please take it back. Please say it ain't so. I don't want to be doomed to a life of making $3 an hour while driving an 85 Honda with 500 thousand miles on it.

I wish that was a joke but it's not.

12 years ago, going in the ministry sounded like the worst idea in the world to me and I was determined to do everything in my power to prevent it. I would rather have bred cats.

I never want to be a pastor.

I said that, prayed that and meant that in the spring of 99. By the fall, my prayers changed started to change...

"There's nothing I'd rather do than pastor. Jesus, I'll do this for free"

Somehow I become a different person without changing my behavior.

I honestly cannot tell you what happened except that Jesus changed my heart. It was like I literally experienced a spiritual heart transplant.

I love looking back at that season because it's a reminder that Jesus can completely change hearts.

Jesus doesn't just tweak or mend hearts. He changes hearts. Complete heart transformations.

I love that truth because often times our hearts doesn't need revived. We just need a brand new one.

We need new desires. New passions. A new love. A new drive.We can pray for behavior modification or we can pray for a new heart.

Create in me a pure heart oh God and renew a right spirit within me. Psalm 51:10

Jesus, please turn a heart of anger into a heart of compassion.

A lustful heart into a pure heart.
A greedy heart into a generous one.
A selfish heart into a selfless heart.
A heart that was abused into a heart that heals.
A broken heart into a whole heart.
A mean spirited heart into a kind heart.

Consider the Apostle Paul. One day his full time job (literally) was to murder as many followers of Jesus as possible. The next day, he was preaching the gospel of Jesus for which he’d end up being beaten, hated, stoned and imprisoned for.

Think Jesus can’t change you? Think again!

It doesn’t often happen over night (well, most times it's over a long period) but Jesus changes hearts and if you ask, He'll trade yours for a better one.

²⁶ I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. (Ezekiel 36:26)

Right now I'm asking him to give me a heart for those who don't know him. To be honest, I just don't think I care that much for the lost.

I pray that my (new) heart will start to break for those who don't know Jesus. What about you?

What kind of heart do you need Jesus to give you?

Also, in what areas of life have you seen God change your heart?

How to look God in the eye.

How to pick your friends and their noses.

How to turn your most embarrassing moment into a legacy

I'm a disgrace to fatherhood.

Your life is NOT lame.

Sammy Adebiyi — Tue, 24 Apr 2012 12:49:19 +0000

Off

I love my life.

Not like I love rice, Dr Phil or sardines (don’t judge!).

And not in a 'it's really my only option so I'm with it' kind of way. No, I mean, I really do love my life.

There I said it. Wow. You have no idea how much guilt I feel for saying that. To be honest, most days, I feel bad even “thinking” about how much I love my life.

For some strange reason It feels more natural to think and believe the opposite.

I hate my life.

See? That was so much easier to type. In fact I feel like the angels just gave me a standing ovation and upgraded my crib in heaven from bronze to silver because I said that. If I keep this up, I could go gold really soon.

Why does saying I hate my life make me feel more spiritual than saying I love my life?

I think it’s It’s because I bought into this lie that says denying myself (to follow Jesus) means I have to literally oathe my life.

I’m realizing that nothing could be further from the truth. Yes Jesus calls us to die to ourselves as we follow him and the bible says God opposes the proud (not a fan of me first type people) but that doesn’t mean he wants you to literally hate your life. Let me put it this way.

Jesus hates your life.

Go ahead and say that to yourself. Jesus hates my life. He fearfully and wonderfully made a life worth hating. He knit lame in my mothers womb.

Does that sound right to you at all?

No it doesn’t, and that’s because it’s not true. Jesus doesn't hate your life and neither should you.

I believe that every person was made with the best life for them. I believe your life is the best life you could have ever had. Anything less and God is NOT good.

I know you can name a million people whose lives seem better than yours but I promise you, you are the best you that you could ever experience. Your life is NOT lame. It's a uniquie display of Gods greatness and there's none else like it.

Don’t get me wrong, when I say ‘life’, I don’t mean life’s circumstances (your financial status, relationship status. Broken dreams, trials, addictions).

Those things might be a big part of your life but they don’t define you.

I can honestly say that even when I experienced the worst times of my life (dad dying, dreams dying, seasons of loneliness and depression), I still would not choose another life.

Yes I still have to fight envy and jealousy and sometimes I still get sad that i’m not a worship leader, a pro athlete, a relative of Steve Jobs or Louie Giglio.

But most days, I’ve learned to love who I am in Jesus. How God made me. The gifts he gave. My quirks. My calling. My role in his story. My personality. I love my life.

But you know what the weird thing is? You’d hate my life.

I honestly believe you'd ultimately hate my life if we switched places because it wouldn’t be your life.
It wouldn't be the YOU that God uniquely formed in your mothers womb.

Please don't get me wrong, I don’t love my life because I think I’m awesome. I love my life because I think God is awesome.

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. (Psalm 139:13-14)

I love my life because I see it an incredible gift from a great God. The best “life” he could have ever given me. A gift that makes me worship Him.

Oh my friends, if only you could see a fraction of the you God carefully knit together in the womb cell by cell, atom by atom, muscle by muscle.

If you saw that you, you’d love your life and praise Jesus for this greatness.

If that’s hard for you to believe, it’s because ‘life’ has clouded your ‘life’. I pray that God opens your eyes to see that you’re literally sitting on the greatest life you could ever have.

Stop trying be someone else. Embrace Gods greatness uniquely displayed in you.

Do you ever have times when you wish you could be someone else? What were some other thoughts you had as you read this?

Silly rabbit, Jesus does not smile.

Someone wants your grubs.

When God gives your buddy 4 more talents than you.

When God picks the fat kid first.

When your good life is bad and your bad life is good

Your dream is NOT dead.

Sammy Adebiyi — Mon, 23 Apr 2012 12:30:20 +0000

Off

You have a dream.

I know you do. It might be buried 6 below in a coffin, beneath a pile of 'life happens' but you still have a dream.

You might need to rent some heavy duty machinery just to break down the concrete plastered over it's tomb stone but you still have a dream.

It might be down to bare bones. No flesh. No heart. No blood.

It might not look bad. It might look impossible but you still have a dream.

Living with a closet full of 'i wonder what could (be) have been' can be devastating.

The good news is your dead dreams not really dead. Maybe in a coma or crippled but not dead. Unless you're a Zombie, a robot or you're reading my blog in heaven, (i.e you're alive) then your dream is not dead because you're not dead.

It might not breathe exuberant life like it did when you were 18 but it's there and it's calling out to you.

Her voice might be a faint whisper. Or a thunderous uproar. Honestly it really doesn't matter because our dreams all have the same cry.

Take a step today.

Not tomorrow.

Today.

Do something NOW.

Just take a step.

Step towards your dream.

Move closer.

Do something.

Ask her out.

Type these words "Chapter 1".

Share the song.

Start the song.

Say hi to him.

Pick up a brochure.

Make a phone call.

Write your first blog post.

Pay the first bill.

Look up adoptions.

Apply for a visa.

Tell your parents.

Go on that date.

Initiate a hard conversation.

Save the first dollar.

Just take a step.

Then take another. And another. And as you keep moving, look for the most obvious signs that you're coming close to your dream: Failure and Uncertainty.

When she says no. And you get a rejection letter. And no one likes you music, smile because you're so close.

No one has ever accomplished anything significant in Gods story without face planting in failure and uncertainty.

Be encouraged by that fact but also remember that no one has every played in Gods story without taking a small step.

God's will for your life is a path of faith. Stop waiting for the heavens to open. He already gave you a dream. Perhaps the reason you're not moving is because all the T's haven't been crossed.

Well, I can assure you that will never happen because God has called us to walk by faith meaning you're not going to know 100%... EVER.

So, just take a small step of faith today. I know it's scary but you can do it through his grace.

Your dream is NOT dead but it might need CPR. It might need you to take a step today. You might need you to take a step today because honestly, it's the only way.

What small step can you take today towards your dreams?

Also, if you're up for sharing, what are some dreams you have for your life?

P:S- if you have the courage to take that step and share it in the comments, I commit to praying for your first step and your dreams today.

The most annoying question in the world.

We all end up at the mall...

What God wants the most from us.

When God gives your buddy 4 more talents than you.

When God picks the fat kid first.

Why I don't believe in prayer.

Sammy Adebiyi — Fri, 20 Apr 2012 10:30:41 +0000

Off

Why don't I believe in prayer?

Simple. Because I don't pray. If I really believed in the kind of prayer Jesus spoke of, you would have to consistently pull me off my knees by my dreads.

But I'm a pastor. I should pray because It's in my job description. I know, but that's the problem.

I DO pray, but most of the time, if I'm honest, I pray like I don't really believe in prayer. I pray like it's my "job". I pray because I don't want to go another day without having my quiet time.

I pray because it's a nice transition. I pray to be spiritual.

I don't think that's what Jesus had in mind when he invited us to pray. I also don't believe God is sitting in heaven with a clip board trying to track who said grace before chowing down on his or her ribs.

No people. No Sammy... No. God IS God.

He conquered the grave.

He spoke the universe into existence.

He holds the entire cosmos in the palm of his hands.

He is unstoppable.

He is wholly Holy.

He is always good.

He declares the end from the beginning.

He holds time in the palm of his hands.

His glory at full blast would kill us.

He has no beginning or end. He's the first and the last.

No one can stop him. No one can resist him. There is no one like him.

His knowledge is unsearchable and his paths are beyond tracing out.

And oh yea, He also gave us his son.

³¹ What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? ³² He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? (Romans 8)

That is the God that invites us to confidently come before him in prayer.

Amazing.

Brothers and sisters, its time to stop praying like it's our job and start praying like we believe that God is really God and He is for us.

Starting today.

If you read yesterday's post, you couldn't walk away without feeling the weight of how broken our world is.

You might carry the same kind of burden but if you're reading this, you've got some brokenness wedged somewhere in your life. Today we get to lift that brokenness to the author of life as a community.

So, here we go. The challenge today is simple and everybody is invited to play.

1. Share a prayer request (nothing is too small, too big, too cliche e.t.c)
2. Pray for someone in the comments. (It doesn't have to be wordy or impressive. Just pray to God like He is God. You can even just say "Im praying". Just do it)

7 things you didn't know about Easter (1/7): Angels can dunk.

7 things you didn't know about Easter (3/7): There was a Zombie Invasion.

7 things you didn't know about Easter (7/7): Jesus depantsed the Holy Place.

How much does God weigh?

How to win a gunfight with an unloaded gun

I'm not good at being black

A story of rape, cutting and the redemption of Jesus.

Sammy Adebiyi — Thu, 19 Apr 2012 05:38:36 +0000

Off

I used to cut myself. (If you didn’t, it’s okay, this is for you, too.)

I lived with my grandparents while my single mom worked. At three she married a man that sexually abused me.

Five when my mom said I was going to be a big sister. Five when my mom divorced. Five and a half when I lived with my sister and mom in one room of my grandparents’ house.

Seven when my parents got married. Seven when I started experiencing verbal and emotional abuse.

Nine when the Easter story convinced me there was hope and I decided I loved Jesus.

(This is a guest post from Jill Dejonge. She's a regular part of this community. She's wise beyond her years and I applaud her courage for sharing this story. Please check out her blog here and connect with her on Facebook here)

Ten when my sister was diagnosed with severe ADHD and an anger disorder.

Twelve when my parents gave up. Twelve when I became head of household. Twelve when I started cutting.

Cutting was a way for me to have control when my world was out of control. It was mine and mine alone. Something nobody could take away.

Cutting was a way for me to heal. Like a scape goat, I could take everything I was feeling –the anger, sadness, and loneliness – and I could put it all inside a cut.

Then I could clean and bandage it and watch it heal. And a piece of me felt like I was healing with it.

Sixteen when I was raped. Sixteen when I cut to make myself ugly. To cover my body with scars that no man would ever want to touch.

Twenty when someone told me:

“God will never hurt you, never abandon you, never forsake you, never break a promise He has made to you, never leave you alone, and never lie to you.

He will always love you no matter what you have done, are doing or will ever do. He will look to you when you are full of shame. He will sit beside you when you are full of sadness.

He will comfort you when you are full of anger. He will encourage you when you are full of passion. He will be everything you need him to be and more.

He sent His Son, His child, to this earth to die for you. That is how much God loves you. He gave everything for you – give everything to Him.”

Twenty when I cut for the last time.

Twenty two and I still fight the temptation.

We all struggle.

When we’re faced with doubt, pain, loneliness, disappointment, anger, shame – we turn to something.

We injure our bodies, eat, don’t eat, look at porn, engage in sexual activities, sleep all day, lash out at our kids or spouse or parents, drink, smoke, do drugs, curse, give up. (Have I hit yours yet?)

We blame someone else, make excuses, cover it up with makeup, take a pill, take lots of pills, pretend. (How about now?)

What do you need to hear from God? What do you need to know is true about him? What does someone have to say for you to give everything to Him?

What are you tempted to turn to (besides Jesus) when you feel doubt, pain, hurt, loneliness, shame e.t.c?

For those of you who have given everything to him and overcame one of these things – share your story! It could be the hope someone here needs.

[Note from Sammy: I have a feeling this post is going to resonate with a lot of people. While the weightiness of some of this is clearly too robost for a blog, I think this post and blog could be space for some to take a baby step with some wounds you've been hiding for a long time. Even if you have to leave the comment as anonymous (and in some cases I recommend it), I want to encourage you to take a baby step and bring your wounds to light today. You don't have to hide anymore. Grace is here. Will you step into the light and embrace it?]

7 things you didn't know about Easter (3/7): There was a Zombie Invasion.

B.F.F'S PART 3 [MY BEST FRIEND LOVES JESUS MORE THAN YOUR BEST FRIEND]

Butt-chins, forehead feet and Jesus.

Caution: God at work.

Dear Reader, You Are Not That Special -God

Trade in your capes & spandex for whitey tighties & tube socks.

Sammy Adebiyi — Wed, 18 Apr 2012 05:12:16 +0000

Off

Or why the world needs more internet wimps.

I've wanted to be a superhero ever since I can remember. Not the metaphoric real life mother Theresa type hero.

No, I wanted to be a literal comic book super hero. Spandex, capes, secret identity and all.

I actually remember contemplating sticking my hands in a fuse box in hopes of an electromagnetic-transformation. I can see the headlines already:

"6 year old boy with ninja turtle sheets tied around his neck fries his Afro after bear hugging a circuit breaker"

It's scary to think how far I was wiling to go to be somebody else. Fortunately I didn't kill myself trying to alter my identity. Unfortunately I found a different easier way to be someone I'm not...

THE INTERNET!

It’s like my very own superman phone booth.

Thanks to Al Gore, all superhero wannabe's no longer need to get bitten by a bionic spider. All it now takes to go from a nerdy reporter to the worlds greatest hero is a simple click.

"The internet: Making us look and sound better than we really are since 1994"

What? You don't know what I'm talking about? Stop it. Seriously, cut the malarkey. You know exactly what I'm talking about.

No? Fine. I guess we'll do this the hard way. Let me ask u a question:

“When was the last time u said something online in a way you'd never say it in person?”

Let's dig a little deeper.

Is there more to you online than there is in person?

Would online friends who have never met you in person be a little disappointed if they interacted with you face to face?

Would they find you to be less courageous? Less politically passionate? Less biblically sound? Less funny? Not as in love with Jesus as they perceived from your tweets and status update?

Does what's on your house/room walls contradict what's on your face-book wall?

Did you spend tons of time trying to find the one really good profile picture of you that doesn't quite show all of you?

Do you say things and proclaim things on blogs/Facebook/tweets that you'd never say in person?

In other words, are you sometimes Clark Kent in real life but superman online? Are you much more impressive and cooler online than you are in person?

I don't know about you but answering yes to any of those questions scares me because I never wanna be something I'm not online.

I always want there to be more to real life me than 'cyber me'.

And even though the internet is a great tool for things like blogging and sermons, I have to remember that I'm not called to "cyber-change-the-world" or be ambassadors of Jesus to the internet.

Rep-ing Jesus on face-book can be effective but in all likelihood, my neighbor won't follow Jesus because I had a rocking status that took me 10minutes to come up with. Just like the world won't feel loved simply because we liked their status updates.

And even if those things happen, if we shine our light online, it should be an overflow of an offline reality.

When the opposite happens, we're no longer Christians shinning the light of Jesus, we're now simply online actors playing a role.

Or online magicians trying to pull a rabbit out of a hat.

We don't wanna be online actors or magicians. We want to be us, and in other to be the real us, we have to trade in our cyber capes and spandex for whitey tighties and tube socks.

You ever seen a superhero in whitey tighties and tube socks?

No you haven't. Only normal guys do that. I guess if you're not a normal guy then you can be a super star online.

Me? I'm just a dude. I don't need giant internet muscles because I don't have giant real life muscles.

Yes I've been blessed with a great platform but at the end of the day, I'm still a regular guy who mows his lawn, takes the trash out and struggles with doing his quiet time.

I still get tempted to puff myself up and try to think of "impressive" tweets or updates but usually if I bench press 50lbs onlline, it's because I've pressed 200lbs in real life.

Ok, now I'm just confusing you with the multiple illustrations so i'll stop and summarize.

Let's not try to post, tweet, say or do something online that projects a super version of us. Just be regular old you and I'll be regular old me.

Deal?

What are some practical ways that we can trade our online capes for whitie tighties? (i.e be more real online)

P:S- Four new sermons uploaded.

Confessions of a bebe-daddy

four, five, SEX part 1: Boobs.

Help, Play or Shut up.

How to look God in the eye.

What Face-Book tells us about Gods will.

10 things you might not know your pastor thinks.

Sammy Adebiyi — Tue, 17 Apr 2012 05:30:41 +0000

Off

1. Is this really God's idea or is this something I came up with?

2. Do these people really like me?

3. Does God really like me?

4. Oh no, I'm not as good as Pastor _____ and our church is definitely not as good as _____.

5. I wonder how many people will show up today. What if no one shows up? There are so many reasons why people should stop coming here.

6. Am I really cut out for this? Or am I just making most of it up? Will I last?

7. Will they forget this sermon? Is anyone's life actually being changed?

8. Was that God's voice or me thinking out loud? I wish I could know 100% that God was behind this idea.

9. God I'm so tired and I feel like I want to just quit.

10. I'm not alright. I'm broken inside.

"But Sammy, I think all those things and I'm not a pastor."

Exactly. Your pastor is human just like you. I think we forget that sometimes but it's true. Pastors are people too.

Yea He might only work one day a week :) and he might have been called to lead many, still, but don't forget that in many ways, he's just like you.

He wants to be loved just like you. He has doubts just like you. He has insecurities just like you.
He struggles with doubt just like you. He deserves grace and mercy just like you.

A 'great job' will do well for him like it does well for you. Criticism hurts him like it hurts you.

All that to say, next time you see your pastor, please love him as you love yourself.

Tell us about your Pastor. (Brag on him. Share sharies)

Also, what things do you appreciate most in a pastor?

Dear Reader, You Are Not That Special -God

Doubt.

Dr Phil, hot sauce mom and your nosey friends

Fail.

Miracle.

Throwing babies off a plane & other thoughts on grace.

Sammy Adebiyi — Mon, 16 Apr 2012 10:38:55 +0000

Off

WAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!! WAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!

Nothing like a crying baby on a plane, especially on an international flight to the great country of Texas.

I tell you what, it's impressive how a cute baby that was smiling in line 10 minutes ago can turn into Godzilla.

Poor mom. She was trying so hard. See, I could feel for her because I have a 9 week old baby. I know what she's going through.

What really intrigued me on this flight though was people's varying responses to the baby’s screams.

On the one hand, you could tell who was like me. New parents, new grandparents, new uncles, aunts or cousins.

Yea, you could spot them and all the others who have a fairly recent relationship with a baby a mile away because they listened and looked at the flustered mom with great compassion.

Now on the other end, you can tell who hasn't had any recent experience with babies because they had these annoyed looks on their faces as though the mom is supposed to literally throw her baby off the plan to stop the disruption.

Now I can’t read people’s minds but I know thats what they are thinking because that's what I used to think before I had a baby.

It's kind of like grace.

You know how you know if someone has really experienced grace? Watch how they respond when others fail.

I'm not talking about the filtered PC response we give publicly once the dirt has settled.

I mean, what happens in your heart when others continually fail?

Do you feel compassion or frustration?
Do you want to help or do you wish the sinner would just jump ship?
Do you continually see the best in people when they fail or do they simply become a block-head who can't get the point when they fail?

When people fail, do you think "them" or "us"?

Do you think it's ultimately about them Man-ing up or do you pray God will do what only he can do in them?

Do you understand how a good Christian can fail or do you have a problem understanding how a good Christian could do what they did?  

Do you believe people can actually be free when they experience a small victory in a big area of struggle or do you secretly assume they'll soon fail again?

You see, the irony about being on the former end of the questions above is it's a great indication that we don't get grace. Or it's been a while since we truly tasted it.

Just like you can't have a baby and not feel for someone with a baby, you can't live in an ocean of grace and have a hard time responding to others with grace and mercy.

I think a great measure of our understanding of grace is our hearts immediate response when people fail.

Tell me about a time when someone has shown you grace when you failed.
Also, what sins do you have a hard time being graceful with? (when people complain, gossip, lie, cheat, steal e.t.c)

Repent.

Sam and Ashley plus 2.

Should Christians use online dating?

Silly rabbit, Jesus does not smile.

Someone wants your grubs.

(Re) Sometimes you have to go commando to be in God's story.

Sammy Adebiyi — Fri, 13 Apr 2012 14:06:49 +0000

Off

My daughter has tons of funny stories from growing up in an orphanage but the one where someone tried to trade their underwear for her chicken might be the funniest

[She’ll kill me for telling this story]...

See, every sunday the kids ate chicken and rice. Not a big deal to most Americans but to a Haitian, it’s like Christmas morning once a week.

And since the only thing better than having Christmas once a week was the possibility of having it twice a week, the kids constantly tried to leverage sunday meals to their advantage...

So when bebe couldn’t find underwear on a school day [she only owned a couple pairs], one of the kids offered a simple solution.

“I’ll trade you my underwear for your chicken on sunday”.

What a brilliant move. Rob her of sundays best by meeting a temporary need on wednesday.

As I listened to this story, I nervously asked Bebe what she did.

She looked at me like I was crazy and said...

“Of course I didn’t dad. Its chicken. Why would I trade my chicken for underwear?”

Her response made me laugh out loud, but it also made me wonder how often we trade our ‘chicken’ for ‘underwear’.

How often do we trade Gods promises for instant gratification?

How often do miss sundays ‘best’ because we settled on wednesday?

All the time.

We are an impatient bunch. We don’t like to wait for ‘sunday’ especially when there’s something in front of us now.

God on the other hand seems to love to take his time.

Not sure if you’ve noticed but pretty much everyone that was used by God in the bible had to do a lot of waiting, sometimes for a really long time.

Moses waited for 40 years in the desert before leading the Israelites. 40!
David tended sheep for a while before defeating goliath then he waited again.
Joseph could have settled for Potiphar’s wife. But he waited. In jail. For years.
Even Jesus didn’t begin his ministry till he was 30.

These stories are NOT the exception.

Every major character in Gods story had to fight the temptation to trade their ‘sunday chicken’ for ‘underwear’.

They had to go ‘commando’ to be in Gods story.

They had to say no to ‘underwear’ and trust God for ‘chicken’. In other words, they had to wait.

There are no short cuts. If we want God to use us, we have to wait. Not the kind of wait that sits idly with folded hands. No, thats easy.

I’m talking about the kind of wait that exposes our insecurities and forces us to trust in God alone because we have no other options.

I guess thats the point. Waiting is about trusting God. Learning to trust God without taking short cuts.

Be honest, in what areas of life (finances, relationships, church growth, job e.t.c) would you feel MOST tempted to take a short cut if the opportunity arises?

Also, what are you ‘waiting’ for these days? What’s your 'sunday chicken'? [Please share]

P:S- Wrote two posts a while ago called "wait" and "waiting". I highly recommend them if this post resonates with you.

P:S:S- "The greatest chick flick ever" contest continues today. Please go here to vote.

Adoption.

Someone wants your grubs.

The gospel according to washing toilet seats.

Wait.

Waiting.

How to fight sin like Rocky.

Sammy Adebiyi — Thu, 12 Apr 2012 10:30:33 +0000

Off

You've had it. You've had enough. You can't resist the temptation anymore.

You can't say no to the sexual urges any longer.
You can't let your spouse get away with another one.
You can’t take another voice of insecurity.
You can't resist that piece of pie another minute.
You can’t walk away from that purchase.
You can’t keep your hands off him or her.
You can't keep trusting God has a plan when you see a way out.
You've had enough of being single...

So you click, walk, leave, unload, get yours, cut, self medicate, throw it all up, settle for good enough e.t.c

You're done. Sin wins with a tap out. Not a knock out, no, you tapped out because you couldn’t take another hit.

Admit it, you gave up. Yes it was hard, but do you realize how close you were to victory? Oh, you were SO close.

I know you thought you'd had all you could withstand but that's a lie. Gods grace could have taken you further. You could have taken a couple more punches.

Life is a battle. Loving family, staying pure, being content and choosing integrity are battles we all fight everyday.

I'll be honest, most of the time I think we give up at about the same point. We throw in the towel when temptation hits us hard in the face and we feel dizzy.

But the other day I had a thought...

What if we got back up after that first hit? What if we fought beyond the breaking point (where we feel like we have nothing left)?

What if we leaned on grace to go BEYOND our breaking point?

In other words, what if we went Rocky 2 on my temptation?

(Rocky 2: a nobody fighter from the streets of Philly commits to going all 15 rounds with the champ. Click link to watch final scene)

I don't know what battle you're fighting right now. What I do know is if you're anything like most Christians, you probably fight lazy. You give in the moment you take a hard punch.

But what if you fought sin like Rocky?

As in stand and fight all 15 rounds with Gods strength. Take every punch. Don’t tap out. Bleed. Get messed up but don’t give up. Go all the way.

I know it feels like you're going to die if you don't click that link, yell, go there or give in to your flesh, but you won't. I promise you won't.

His grace is enough. It is. You won't die.

You'll only win one AFTER your breaking point and once you do, your breaking point is no longer where it was and before you know it, your breaking point becomes your starting point.

Last week we celebrated Easter. You know why? Because Jesus pulled a Rocky.

Think about it. If Jesus were ever going to give up on the cross, it would’ve been in the garden. He was tempted to give up. He wanted to give up. But he didn't. He fought. He didn't tap out.

In your struggle against sin, you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood. (Hebrews 12:4)

In other words, don't give in so easily to sin. You’ve been knocked down. It's done.

Now get back up and FIGHT. If you’re reading this then it’s NOT over.   His grace is enough.

Seriously. Freaking get back up. No time for pity parties. There's so much at stake.

His grace is enough to take you all 15 rounds, but you'll never know it if you go down easy.

Be honest (even if you have to comment as anonymous), what temptations are you fighting lately? (food? lust? greed? pride? comfort? impatience?)

I think I'm better than Jesus

I want to quit.

I'm a Christian and I believe in Karma.

I'm a disgrace to fatherhood.

I'm not good at being black

7 things you didn't know about Easter (7/7): Jesus depantsed the Holy Place.

Sammy Adebiyi — Wed, 11 Apr 2012 10:45:07 +0000

Off

Injecting a jolt of freshness into Easter by looking at 7 unique stories surrounding the resurrection of Jesus.

Part 1: The angel who dunked.
Part 2: Dead people don't eat sushi.
Part 3: There was a Zombie Invasion.
Part 4: Theives don't fold clothes.
Part 5: Jesus loves gardens.
Part 6: Jesus ate Friday like Pringles.
Part 7:...

Jesus depantsed the Holy Place.

Can somebody please tell me why spell check is saying 'depantsed' is not a word? Seriously. Please look it up and let me know what your research yields. Your effort will not go unrewarded.

For those who are confused by my use of the word, to 'depants' someone is to pull their pants (not underwear) down in public (i.e exposing what was meant to be concealed by wearing of pants).

K. Now that we're on the same page, please allow me to show you a bizarre yet incredible thing that happened when Jesus died on the cross...

⁵⁰ And when Jesus had cried out again in a loud voice, he gave up his spirit. At that moment the curtain of the temple was torn in two from top to bottom. The earth shook and the rocks split. (Matthew 27:50-51)

Let me give you a little context so you can appreciate those 13 words underlined above.

Before the death and resurrection of Jesus, Jews HAD to go worship God at the temple in Jerusalem and in said temple was a curtain that separated the 'holy place' from 'the holy of holies'.

To keep it simple, only the high priest was allowed to enter the Holy of Holies once a year because it 'housed' the presence of God. The curtain or veil was for concealment so it was called 'the veil of covering'.

Sudden death was the immediate consequence for anyone else who saw past the curtains into the Holy of Holies because none was worthy to see much less stand before a Holy God.

Enter Matthew 27:50-51.

I honestly think this is one of the most dramatic passages in scripture. Think about it. The VERY moment Jesus took his last breath, the curtain separating a Holy God from sinful man was torn in half.

And get this, it happened from TOP TO BOTTOM.

Catch that? Top to bottom.

Bottom to top and you could argue that it was a conspiracy. Maybe Jesus had someone waiting in the temple with a pair of giant scissors with instructions:

"start cutting the veil the moment you get word through the walkie talkie that I died.. It will be SO dramatic."

Possible? Maybe but not likely. Especially since no random yahoo could just waltz into the temple AND don't forget that the curtain was ripped from top to bottom.

I love that Matthew included that. Just another one of those minor details that seems to speak volumes to me.

Top to bottom.

Sounds to me like God was the one doing the ripping. Yes, God just 'depantsed' the Holy of Holies. He exposed the mystery. There is no longer concealment or a barrier between God and man.

The veil has been torn. ANYONE may now come in to the very presence of God because of the cross.

Therefore, brothers and sisters, since we have confidence to enter the Most Holy Place by the blood of Jesus, ²⁰ by a new and living way opened for us through the curtain, that is, his body, ²¹ and since we have a great priest over the house of God,

²² let us draw near to God with a sincere heart and with the full assurance that faith brings, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water (Hebrews 10:19-22)

You hear that? YOU, yes, YOU can confidently enter the most Holy place. You can come as close as you want to God. You can have an audience with the Holy God without any shame or guilt.

Not because you're good enough but because his blood was shed for you and because...

He is Risen.

Why do you think it's hard for us to come confidently before God?
Also, tell us of a time when you've felt really close to God.

How to cure your zits without feeding your dog Chipotle

How to do a poor job in the name of Jesus.

How to pick your friends and their noses.

How to pursue your wife and miss the point

How you can kill envy and jealousy in one step.

7 things you didn't know about Easter (6/7): Jesus ate 'Friday' like Pringles.

Sammy Adebiyi — Mon, 09 Apr 2012 12:20:49 +0000

Off

Injecting a jolt of freshness into Easter by looking at 7 unique stories surrounding the resurrection of Jesus.

Part 1: The angel who dunked.
Part 2: Dead people don't eat sushi.
Part 3: There was a Zombie Invasion.
Part 4: Theives don't fold clothes.
Part 5: Jesus loves gardens.
Part 6:

Jesus ate 'Friday' like Pringles

Good friday was not really that good was it?

Jesus was arrested, beaten and bruised. His beard was pulled out and they placed a crown of thorns on him.

Add the fact that his friends all deserted him and yea, the friday didn’t start out so good and the ending wasn’t any better now was it?

Hung on a cross to die while people spit and ridiculed him.

Yes. Good friday was not very good. The only reason we see it as good is because we know the end of the story. We know Sunday is coming. We celebrate death because we know life came from it.

But in real time? not so much.

Just gloom, darkness and tears. That awful “life-just-kicked-me-in-the-teeth” feeling in your stomach.

If you’re ever experienced a “friday” (who hasn’t?), you know exactly what I’m talking about.

Man, Fridays can sometimes really kick our behinds, but the good news is, Easter proves that there is always hope.

Easter is evidence that for those who place our faith in Jesus, though the sorrow may last for the night, joy comes in the morning.

In other words, friday won’t last forever and sunday is coming. Guaranteed. Sunday is coming.

I don’t know what you’re going through right now, but I can guarantee you that if you hang with Jesus, Sunday is coming.

Book it. Sunday is coming.

Actually, you know what... that’s not true. Scratch that. Sunday is NOT coming. Sunday is already here. It's here. Sunday IS today because Jesus ate up friday (like pringles) the moment these words were uttered...

He is Risen.

In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world. -Jesus (John 16:33)

Translation?

Fridays are real but Sunday is already here. Death has been swallowed up in victory.

Ever wonder how some people can have peace and hope in the midst of the worst storms of life? How a guy like Paul can be on death row and speak of the mercies of God?

Makes absolutely no sense.

Unless you know Sunday is here. Unless you have a promise that death cannot touch from a savior who conquered the grave.

Unless you know that you know that you know that you know that you know that...

He is Risen.

What week day are you currently experiencing? Monday-Thursday (just you and Jesus painting the town red with some of the usual ups and downs), Friday (storms, pain and tears) or Sunday (eating sushi with Jesus because he just brought you out of something)?

If you're in a friday, let us know so we can stand beside you in prayer. Please. If you're rocking monday-thursday, please share so we can learn from your adventures with Jesus. And Sunday people? Bring it. Share the joy.

Spiritual Paralysis...

Stop acting like you're not good at anything...

The craziest thing I've ever heard about Gods love.

Waiting.

When your good life is bad and your bad life is good

7 things you didn't know about Easter (5/7): Jesus loves gardens.

Sammy Adebiyi — Fri, 06 Apr 2012 13:34:23 +0000

Off

Injecting a jolt of freshness into Easter by looking at 7 unique stories surrounding the resurrection of Jesus.

Part 1: The angel who dunked.
Part 2: Dead people don't eat sushi.
Part 3: There was a Zombie Invasion.
Part 4: Theives don't fold clothes.
Part 5...

Jesus loves Gardens.

I’m not particularly a garden guy but apparently Jesus is. In Genesis 1, he planted a garden and put man in it.

"Go ahead Adam, take care of the garden. Trim those rose bushes but don’t forget to put some gloves on first because “every rose has it’s thorns”.

That will make sense in 1988. Band named poison. You don’t get it? Never mind. How about you take a nap so I can make you a naked woman...."

You know the rest of the story. Adam and Eve sin and everything changes.

I think one of the most chilling moments in scriptures has to be when God came in the garden and called out to Adam who was hiding.

"Who told you that you were naked? Did you eat of the tree I commanded you not to eat of?"

Phew.

Genesis 3 ends with God cursing and banishing man from the garden, but what does this have to do with Easter?

At the place where Jesus was crucified, there was a garden and in the garden a new tomb in which no one had ever been laid... they laid Jesus there. (John 19:41-42)

So looks like we’re back in a garden.

14 At this, she turned around and saw Jesus standing there, but she did not realize that it was Jesus. 15 He asked her, “Woman, why are you crying? Who is it you are looking for?” Thinking he was the gardener, she said, “Sir, if you have carried him away, tell me where you have put him, and I will get him.”   

16 Jesus said to her, “Mary.” She turned toward him and cried out in Aramaic, “Rabboni!” (which means “Teacher”). Jesus said, “Do not hold on to me, for I have not yet ascended to the Father. Go instead to my brothers and tell them, ‘I am ascending to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God.’”

THIS IS AMAZING.

So, we’re back in a garden again but this time the tables are turned. There are no curses or banishments. Just blessings and a restoration of relationship with God through an incredible statement by Jesus...

“My father and YOUR father. My God and YOUR God”

The crazy thing is so many of us still live in the first garden. We are still hiding because of guilt and shame. We fear curses and banishment.

Easter is an invitation to a new garden. A new life. A new promise.

Listen to what Jesus tells his disciples after he rose from the dead....

46 He told them, “This is what is written: The Messiah will suffer and rise from the dead on the third day, 47 and repentance for the forgiveness of sins will be preached in his name to all nations, beginning at Jerusalem. (Luke 24:46-47)

Translation?

We don’t have to live in the shadow of the first garden anymore. There’s a new garden with a tomb that is empty. Forgiveness is here. He is Risen.

Happy Easter my friends. Live forgiven today because...

He is Risen.

What do you think would happen if we believe that we are really completely forgiven of all sins through Jesus?

Also, can you please repeat after me in the comments section... "I am forgiven of all sins". Go ahead. Seriously. It's the message of Easter. Say it with me... "I am forgiven of all sins".

Jesus likes crappy gifts.

Just a dude talking to dudes about love.

Sometimes you have to go commando to be in Gods story!

Why being a Christian is exactly like snoring.

Why I hope my wife births an Indian baby

7 things you didn't know about Easter (4/7): Thieves don't fold clothes.

Sammy Adebiyi — Thu, 05 Apr 2012 10:46:53 +0000

Off

Injecting a jolt of freshness into Easter by looking at 7 unique stories surrounding the resurrection of Jesus.

Part 1: The angel who dunked.
Part 2: Dead people don't eat sushi.
Part 3: There was a Zombie Invasion.
Part 4...

Thieves don’t fold clothes.

Years ago my roommates and I got robbed at gun point. I’ll never forget the feeling of having a shotgun pointed at my face and I’ll never forget what my room looked like post-robbery.

It was like a bomb went off. Every drawer was emptied and my clothes were scattered everywhere.

The moral of the story is that robbers don’t fold your clothes for you. Here's how this applies to Easter.

62 The next day, the one after Preparation Day, the chief priests and the Pharisees went to Pilate. 63 “Sir,” they said, “we remember that while he was still alive that deceiver said, ‘After three days I will rise again.’

64 So give the order for the tomb to be made secure until the third day. Otherwise, his disciples may come and steal the body and tell the people that he has been raised from the dead. This last deception will be worse than the first.”

65 “Take a guard,” Pilate answered. “Go, make the tomb as secure as you know how.” 66 So they went and made the tomb secure by putting a seal on the stone and posting the guard. (Matthew 27:62-66)

So before Jesus rose from the dead, there was a plan to prevent a robbery and after Jesus was raised from the dead, there was a plan to fake a robbery.

11 While the women were on their way, some of the guards went into the city and reported to the chief priests everything that had happened. 12 When the chief priests had met with the elders and devised a plan, they gave the soldiers a large sum of money,
13 telling them, “You are to say, ‘His disciples came during the night and stole him away while we were asleep.” (Matthew 28:11-13)

 The problem with the first plan was, well, guards are the least of the worries for an angel who can dunk.

Problem with the second plan was, well, thieves don’t fold clothes. In other words, If his body was stolen at night, you would have known the moment you walked in the tomb and this wouldn’t have happened.

Then Simon Peter, who was behind him, arrived and went into the tomb. He saw the strips of linen lying there, 7 as well as the burial cloth that had been around Jesus’ head. The cloth was folded up by itself, separate from the linen.
8 Finally the other disciple, who had reached the tomb first, also went inside. He saw and believed. (John 20:6-8)

In light of being raised from the dead, it seems like a minor detail that the cloth was folded. I don’t think it is.

I think it’s just another reminder that we serve an unstoppable God. They planned to stop it. When that didn’t work, they planned to blame it on thieves. But he was always a step ahead. He made sure the cloth was folded up.

This ain’t a robbery fools.

He is RISEN.

We serve an unstoppable God. Tell us of a time when you have seen God move in your life in spite of man's plans.

Dear Reader, You Are Not That Special -God

four, five, SEX part 1: Boobs.

Interview with an Angel

Just a dude talking to dudes about love.

When God picks the fat kid first.